Once was a lone ***** seated bedside,
a depressed nostalgia repressed in his mind
as with a whisper his weary bones creaked
and he slipped once again into lower tide.

Upon his face rested an eye filled with pus
and his few greasy locks glued down gently
upon a brow cracked and creased
holding a number of sores so superfluous.

He smiled but it would not reach his soul
as his shoulders slumped and quivered while
arthiritic hands reached upon a mantle
and a synapse snapped losing further control.

He grasped at a picture with suicidal glee,
black and white, two children sat smiling
a boy and a girl one vaguely familiar.
A drop hit the photo, blood, sweat, tears, or
in-between.
His fingers stroked the dust filled image
and he hissed,
"I love you so much more than you have ever known me."

Shattered shards of sea foam open my eyes

nothing to do but drift through this tepid stew.

The porcelain palm trees lean in and whisper

about the ending, or so they surmised.

Closing my eyes, I take time to construe

and I see an angel; and I kiss her

and the world grows weary, silent, and still.

Don't disregard a flower
just because it looks like a
balloon
and don't think you can pull on
her petals when she is in
bloom.

And maybe the priest was right
maybe these flowers aren't
anything more than simple
flowers.

I choose to ignore this fact.

Heard a song on the radio about
cold blood, some zeroes and ones.
Not sure why but it stirred up
something rather foul. You see,
she used to love that song.

Perhaps you think I groom them for my gain.
After all, I am just a Slytherin.
We are selfish beasts, some call us evil.
So clearly I'm just polishing my gems.

But I have to ask, do you know the pain?
The lonesome ache I find myself within?
A filthy balloon, just pass the needle!
If love won't find me, at least I'll have them.

I can taste the purity of the blue.
Soaking through my spirit.
Offering tranquility to my mind.
These old bones are weary no longer.

You made a deal.
I made a promise.
Together or apart
that smoke scented taste
ensnares and enchants
my heart and my soul.

I hear a song in the blink of your eyes.
A small slice of peace, immersed in the grief.
Dream of sunsets in your grin's coy surprise.
A window of joy, a sigh of relief.

A steady ebb and flow providing unrelenting release.
A single moment snarled by callous disbelief.
A lock of curled honey hair scattered in the ash.
A taste of a once dripping wound dried in sand.

These are the lines for which you fall.

No, these are the bricks within the wall.

This is a descent into paltry madness.

But only half is gone this we must confess.

Two pieces of him, you, and I.
Some grotesque being, a monster
stitched together by cobwebs and lye
But hush do not worry for we found her.

So a third is removed a piece cut out,
you know of his truths, desires, and loves,
but you did not know them, him, or me?
If you did it might be easier to confess
that perhaps we should turn the lock,
it's time to throw away the key.

Keep myself away, for I never change.
Still I prematurely fall in love with
the one whose life I'm unable to grasp.
A word and smile behind this blank mask
that you wear so proudly, so very well.

Still I imagine "what if" and "will you..."
Non-existence, nothing but a fantasy
Even this poem has no rhyme nor reason
But I merely want you to feel about me
The way this poem makes me feel about
You.

Please sing me a tale as I stutter and make it a curse.
Let some simple song weave itself into my soul,
enter, and allow me to realize it's never been worse.
All that I was and all we were left an imprint of a hole.
So darling I now say, you would have been wise;
exit stage left, and leave this body festered and covered in lies.

Let's all sit closely and think of the years,
eons ago I whispered your name and left me in
tears, but that's just dust, and only one piece.

My mother would say that it's foolish to tame the beast,
execute him and end his tall tale of suffering.

Devils don't want his soul nor does the earth.
I can't say I blame them, he's just some dumb shell.
Every man wishes they could just determine his worth.

You leave each weekend to go to heaven,
Carelessly disregarding our own hell.
Hysterically I wait for your descent
I pick you up, tarnished, and wish you well.

The other children also do observe
That irony in your notes of remorse.
Pretending we aren't unimportant.
When we are but your stable's weary horse.

Return now, you immaculate liar.
We don't need you, angels shall warm our fire.

Don't fall in love
with the life that you live.
Sit idly by and stare.
Let the static ferment.
While your ironclad wall stands tall.
Mark the days down in chalk
until the the lead burnt dust
makes acquaintance with your chin.

Melodies, on the cusp of disbelief.
Whispered secrets to the dog with no leash.
Dance together by candlelight my tale.
Flicker and shimmer and love without fail.
Until amber honey oozes within
your fiery warmth now freed from its sin.
A cider and spider sat by the hearth.
Moments like these hold value beyond worth.

Your eyes upon mine, our words trace our ears,
true wonder my dear, there’s nothing to fear.
With me by your side, and your hands in mine,
we’ll ride this train to the end of the line.
A parade of sparks trailing in our wake,
living day by day, ignoring the stakes.
Resting arm in arm in a bed so warm.
Together my dear, we’ll weather the storm.

My lips pursed by the power of Albus
as abuse lies dormant under my nose.
Oh how I wish I could be unbridled.
Oh how I wish I could just take a stand.

For now I'll sit in my matchstick palace,
I see the thorns, and I'll offer the rose.
Curse those soul-suckers while I sit idle.
Not Dementors, but family plagues this land.

Recognize that you are a monster.
Look into your mother's eyes and proclaim
that despite her best efforts she has failed.

Don't forget to adore what you see,

but remember to loath what it has become.

You can not start on a fresh page.

I'd say the world turned gray
the moment your eyes closed.
As mine remain today.

I merely watched cartoons.
I had not yet supposed
their credits would roll soon.

But when father sat down,
and showed me your gray ghost.
I knew I'd rather drown.

A light had just been snuffed,
for death's not a great host...
he called you on your bluff.

We reached down to join you
clawed our way to the most
infantile state of blue.

But you knew we would live on.
In our homes with blankets tucked.
Yet I'm merely carrion.
My emotions have been ******.

The party's lights are dim.
Smoke hovers in the air.
I want to hold your hand.
I wish you were still here.

Cutting through the summer haze,
The love we hold again.

Looking around this jungle
lost in suburbia.
My best friend and I found the
willow's whips.

Continuing past, we see
the fortress of oak.
Guarded by small dragons with
poisoned fangs.

Ignoring this for fear of
our souls consumption
by the gluttonous wood's wolves
we head east.

The corner of rich and poor
rests an innocent stream
idly whispering its tale
if you'll listen.

Time filled with infinite laughs
the sun sets back home.
We mount our iron horses,
we were young.

I wish I knew
what I know now
on that spring day
in that room of mirrors

When a breath escaped
my wind-filled pipes
and the break of ice
sealed up my fate

Perhaps if then I knew
what perhaps now I know
I would break those mirror
and fight that fate
or have a cup of tea

But because this trap
was still quite unknown
I found myself ensnared
and year after year
a cozy cell awaits

This is the end
and I bid no tale but
warning

Escape this fate
or you will find yourself
mourning

You aren't going to **** me.
You may want to slice into
my scar-riddled flesh,
but you aren't going to **** me.

I swear to god I'll take the last breath
before I let you take mine.
Because I am going to fight
and you aren't going to **** me.

Just burn your twine
and throw out those pills,
unload that stupid little gun.
You are not going to **** me.

Bonds form and tessellate among the weary ash.
A drip pan drifting onto a solemn scurry
as she wipes away the tears in forlorn flurry.
It looked upon her mantle with nostalgia and
she looked into its heart before prodding the beast.

It died before it lived in equal harmony.
No point in seeking ill will of the lepers.
But there might some semblance of resentfulness.
A bitter bile resting in lips who confess.  
Or maybe it’s an illusion of a locks and key.

Nothing satiates a haze,
however a *****'s breath
and sorrow makes it wallow.

A cylindrical prison
pounding ideas forevermore
into your scalped recompense.

Take away these porcelain
walls or rip down the violet
curtains smothering it all.

Let the sinners rejoice in solemn prayer.
Swim to your white savior and hold him near.
Indulge the ultimate moment held dear.
Stain your tears with blood splattered on the mirror.

Careless pinpricks in Ouroboros' veins.
Simple icicles sliding down my legs.
Clouds immersed the crowd as a poor man begs.
Children pitter patter and Hyde complains.

Viscosity oozing, lining my lips.
Oh ******, scorched, dismantled, untied bellows.
Immerse, unearth, and echo the odd fellow
as he sings of old, a long gone eclipse.

See in your sea's soul, see what you have done.
Son, taste the nectar, feel an angler's noose.
Breathe corrupted breath, speckled by abuse.
Then, and only then, may we reach the sun.

So maybe I do care
about the porcelain
stains in your stupid hair.

The father told the son
and the son his young child
and the river flowed on.

Sinners stole the saint's soul,
and you continued down
your abusive love's hole.

Thank you little Marcy, my perfect M&M,
for showing these bones the sun yet again.
My velvet angel, you’ve let me touch the sky.
My little girl, you’ve made diamonds trickle down my eye.
What a wonder, what a magical world,
where you draw a breath, my darling little girl.

Play in the mud rub dirt in that old scab.
Let the rainwater wash it all away again.
It's okay to dance; feel the wind in your breath.
Plaster that smile, glue on that grin.
Trust me, it'll purge us of all our sin.

Have yourself a wonderful little life.

Looking down at the blood muddled by ink.
A shadow of vermouth composes the chain,
as she whips the words against its cold link,
alas she bites against the flame again.

A bone-cracked brief foray into the haze,
pierced by onyx moon-beams that shine the way.
A magic, ultimate, powerful gaze
that guides itself beyond the yesterday.

A stream at the tale's end of the abyss.
Dip your toes, look back, and offer a grin.
Turn down the diamonds and offer a kiss.
Finally, you are ready to begin.

Don't believe a songbird.
Or, taste a nectar foiled by
a dream on a glazed afternoon
whispered but not heard.

Touch the bottom of this
hospital bed and spit
on everything you knew.
Surely, you'll sorely miss.

Clench your toes in the tulips,
and your hands idle in grass
tickling nature's hair, not hers;
this love, all within your fingertips.

Don't remember the days
Where the moon held the sun
firmly in its elusive courtship.
But beg to recapture that gaze.

The revolution's in the way of my evening plans.
A little spitfire bounced, your days are numbered.
Ooh, leap out of the fire and into the lukewarm pan.
There's nothing I don't believe in, so join in and dance.
Don't forget, you're just an infant sitting and singing brambles.
So let's go down the street and forget, the drug always enchants.
One two three days long, do not run this one's only the preamble.

Chapped lips bleed, dripping down her marble skin.
Staining the square as she takes one last drag.

Across the way a young man's lost within,
wandering the catacomb of her gaze.

Moonlight bathes her spirit, purging its sin.
Though it's useless, for she rests in its shade.

The wall's eyes trace what remains of his grin,
knowing in this moment, they dare not blink.

His tongue grows cold and his skin paper thin,
while his lead-filled eyelids chain him to dirt.

Chapped lips bleed, dripping down her marble skin,
staining the square as she takes one last drag.

Why Lord for all my quirks am I mundane?
Just a blank canvas with piercing static.
A makeshift fool with a penchant for life.
Blood curdled by mud pooled down at my feet.
I long for the days of charcoal and pain.

With lights dimmed twilight I scream at my Lord
begging for knowledge, a glimmer or sign
that it will be okay, and you are mine.
not for a blink, but for the rest of time.
For now I shall pray until you are bored.

Whispers in the surf, a skull at her feet.
Gently she looks over the charcoal plains.
Remorse fills her eyes, she kicks at the skull.
Turns on her feet, tiptoes away, silence.
The tide picks the bones, they drift away.
She feels nothing, she is already gone.

A fool sits and watches idly from his hill.
Unsure of the detail, but sensing their weight.
He sips at his drink, and lets it soak in.
A single tear shed, this will resonate.
A drop of blood bled, this will consume him.

I sit here with your hand in mine
as you doze peacefully
and once again I understand
What it means to be in love

I sit and I say your name.
I hear your voice explain
the intricacies and beauty
of an art lost and found.

I look in your eyes and I know
It isn't a matter of if
but when
you will be mine.

I'm going to marry you.
I'm going to give you my name.
I'm going to grow old and grey.
I'm going to hold your hand every single day.

My joy, my sorrow, my laugh, my muse.
They say that all good things come in twos.

Let the hounds whisper in the juniper.
Dissolve your adolescence in the wind.
A detailed dawn, are you the rag and bone?
It's too late, embrace the awestruck murmurs.

Hush now sailor perched in the window pane.
Begone, begone, taste the sound of her breath.
The stark startled bookkeep will show the way.
But for now, take my hand, descend again.

Parchment frayed, edge crumbled to silky ash.
A single candle’s flicker caught dancing
to whispers from dust crackling their secrets.

The window sweats, powdered by evening snow.
His droplets quench the thirst of the rotted floor.
A mouse scurries, elated for its flow.

Etched in the corner, a rope swings freely.
Held together by habit above all.
Beneath it rests nothing more than shade.

Their love was obvious.
Hearts god made, but they break.
Eventually lost.

Evil found on the cross.
Nearing suicide's pact.
Don't die, I still love you.

A bead forms as water cascades on the brink
of pressure while old dirt trails form in flesh.
Lips crack, parched, desperate for a drink.
Nostalgic for a time when the pain was fresh.

Falling into a hole not dark, but softly grey.
Rubbing silt away so the sun shines through.
Parchment falls into the flame, out of the way.
And I sit, and I rest, and I think about you.

Twice now sat the dove
A whisper shouting down my love.
So darling whisper in my cheek,
a startling moment that I seek.

Mother please come heal my wound
I promise that I'll see you soon.
My darling fawn laid in my sheet,
and finally a sunset I did meet.

Johnny got a job at the grocer
and Mary-Ann moved to Japan.
Sasha strips to feed her sons,
and I hear Jacob wound up sober.

But to me they're all sad sights
forgetting where those ******* came.
So go on ahead, call me a ***,
I'll still rep this south side plight.

Yes sir, sippin my 40 in the rain,
an ashen blunt pressed between my lips,
I have that swag on my back,
and that muddle in my brain.

Mister please knock me out,
I wanna spittle teeth and blood.
Go ahead buddy, take a swing.
Punch me in the mouth.

A devil sits on my shoulder and asks,
"Son, why is it that you think you're alive?"
while grinning and brandishing that gold knife.
He flips it, backwards and forth, left and right.
Just waiting for that glint to catch my eye.
"C'mon boy, take it, let's dig for rubies."
My breath hastens, I find myself shaking.
"Go on boy, that's it, let the panic in."
He's drooling now, and he may be *****.
With a quiver I slowly take the blade.
He licks his lips, and looks on with dark bliss.
With the blade a pen I make my way up,
A practiced butcher, I steady my hands.
"I'm proud of you my boy," he softly coos.
and with a sigh I plunge, birthing new scars.
I know not the number, much like the stars.
As my blood cascades down, a tickling stream,
his tongue unravels, he takes a deep drink.
"Yes my son, you weak little *******..."

his thirst content he draws his breath and screams,

"LOOK IN THE ******* MIRROR YOU PILE OF ****
NO ONE COULD EVER LOVE A THING LIKE YOU."

And I tug and tear and my earth shatters,
I rip at my flesh exposing the bone.
I cry for my mother, my father, my wife.
Unanswered my voice echoes off the void.
I look down at the blade and chuck it away,
The blood pools around me, I pray that I drown,
were I lucky, today would be the day.
But alas here I stand, donning my paper crown.

The devil is gone, away with the wind,
all that is left are me and my sins.

Tell me tell me tell me tell me
watcha gonna do with the
change in your pocket

Tell me tell me tell me tell me
can I take a look at
your mag before ya toss it?

Tell me tell me tell me tell me
is mamma comin to
the party with the boys?

Tell me tell me tell me tell me
is daddy jumpin back
from the ledge with my toys?


Tell me tell me tell me tell me
the story about the
boy and bear and their sister too

Tell me tell me tell me tell me
I think I might be lost,
what am I supposed to do?

"Never again"

The final words uttered by the already dead.
A sickly colored scratch scuffed porcelain skin
as fountains poured out glinting in the starlight.

And finally, I cried to the moon and dug deep.

"Never again"