The army is here my friend.
Can you hear the songbirds?
I'll rise again and overflow.
I'll haunt the corners of your mind.
Set the flesh on fire, strip it down
Grease your insides with my guts.
The belly of the beast holding my hand.
What are we even good for?
Don't scream anymore.
I can taste the air. I can taste the flame.
Moment by moment we will find it.
Second by second we will descend
Ascend.
Begin again.

In a different time
a different place
I died at 19.
Alone in a room so
sterile.
The phone never pierces
into my black, rotted heart.
You never remind me
Of who I am.
Of what I mean.
I slash my wrists
and an echo remains.

But
You did.
I'm here.
Alive.
In love.
Our hands intertwined.
You saved my life,
and now it is ours.

Thank you.

Oh to taste the sensation of the sun,
its crystalline embers upon your back.
Embrace the baby blue warmth with a glow.
Soon the cocoon shall burst its full array.
and the moment will begin to decay
until all that remains is gray and fun.

A sunbeam tans the hide.
It crusts the blood to scab.
The flesh and marrow dried.

Pour absinthe on the wound.
Scalp the ***** to bone.
The rest will be consumed.

A final cracked tongue lolls.
It waits the vulture's eye.
They've reached the final cull.

I want to lie on the rocking chair.
Long-forgotten dread drifting off to the side.
I don’t remember the love we had, but I lied.
All in my head, detailed illusions lay bare.

I ******* and cry and disgust the heavens.
Slice deep into the chest. Heart in my hands.
For now we must carve out my final demands.
Until now in the din, I die, and so goes the raven.

Why do we do the things that we do?
Why is it always just me and you?
I wonder, I ponder, I play in the sand.
I look for the answer on the back of my hand.

Tell me your secrets, tell me your lies.
Tell me why we never really say goodbye.

At the age of nineteen I fell in love
with a girl that I thought was just like me.
But she was better, not bitter or broke.
And so my mind whispered that she was of
a lesser kind, a twisted evil folk.
And there was nothing but red in this sea;
I sought her soul, and she sadly obliged.
And I told myself it was her not I-
Her that fell in love,her who wept for me.
But I knew I lied,told a toxic joke.
With a dun sigh, she'd wilt and die.
To bloom again, another day and time.
I pray she lost my name and toxic love.
But still I'm sorry, my dear friend Jodie

I want the mud to cushion my fall
and the moonbeams to whisper
inside of my bones and scream out
"MY BOY MY BOY COME HERE AND BEGONE
NOTHING IS MERRY
NOTHING IS WON"

and I will cry tears of bloodstains and crystal
and you will look down from your perch and
shriek
"MY CHILD MY CHILD THE END IS NEAR
LOOK UP AT THE HEAVENS
WHICH YOU HOLD SO DEAR
WHISPER HER NAME AND SPIT OUT YOUR
FEAR"

I have seen the lines in the sand.
Perhaps you understand.

God in the machine, weeping,
Perhaps you understand.

A furrowed brow upon the back of my hand,
Perhaps you understand.

A final hasty sigh, unto the void creeping.
Perhaps you understand.

Ethereal bubbling from below
pressed together rosebuds drifting down
as silk snakes into the soul.

Millions of matchsticks ignite your bones
and a crashing wave of goosebumps invades
while the wide world begins to glow.


And you don't know just where to begin
so you lay back and let your mind flow.

Oh to love the chilled touch of winter turned to spring.
Slush dusted slabs containing multitudes of grey.
Recollections of Summer, form mist brushed past ones lips
as the air idly dances, across another morning missed.

A faint whistle breaks through a preview of green,
and somewhere strangers don one final jacket.
Long-aching bones grow less brittle moment to moment,
and finally, friends one and all feel faintly more fantastic.

The toad looked to the sunset,
greeted it with a weary croak.
It nestled in, starting its night.
Mundane and filled with peace.

I wonder what it means to be
a toad. Green ridged with gold.

Do his hops hold a destination?
Do his tears hold longing?
Or is it blood, cogs, and gears?

A mind filled with static.

I do not know, and perhaps I never will.

A final hum of the furnace quivers;
its flame casts solitude in sharp relief.
A pondering pledge of endless bitters.
The final moments of endless belief.

We arrive at the dawn of the sixth moon.
Seven and twenty years frozen in time.
A hatchet comes down, its time shall come soon.
Finally, we reach the end of this rhyme.

Live beyond the limits and
if you say goodbye they find
obtuse ramblings in your hand.

So pucker up buttercup
damnation to your consent;
you must now sip the queen's cup.

Or die trying, they don't mind
whether a bloom or wither
it's all sport to the confined.

A life held softly, briefly in my hand.
Tantalizing, sweet, composed of my dreams.
Oh what I would give to taste it again.

Look me in the eye and whisper the word.
Tell me everything you want me to hear.
Two truths and one more lie, it matters not.
For the end I fear is becoming clear.

I do not long for moments lost.
I long for losses yet to come.

Tell me darling, can you taste upon your lips
the ashes of a million moments missed?
Do the memories still cry out your name?
Can you still recall the last time we kissed?

You once said lightning comes in a bottle,
while handing over my heart in a jar.
To this day I still hold it in my hands,
nestled to my chest, I wonder where you are.

I may never again taste life's sweet honey.
Weave the wicker basket's ringlets through the air.
Cigarette smoke offers a simple echo.
And I question what left I have to spare.

I would very much prefer it
if
the color of your eyes were
not
etched so vividly into
mine.

Storm the beach with sand-filled eyes.
Burying hatchets along the way.  
Let the turtle dove rest in your palm.
Hum the hymn for the sinful demise.
Bless the butcher and embrace the calm.
Lay in the gravel, embrace the newest day.

Driftwood and briar leaves, brambles and hay.
Dance with your demons, sever your earthly ties.
Destroy all around you, burn down the psalms.
Just turn off your mind, your balance, your sway.
It is time now dear child, you shall retire your qualms.
It is time now young darling to release your final sighs.

I ponder the thought of an empty moon.
Candlelight snuffed, thoughtlessly they consume
the thoughts of the mind, endless periled doom.
Do not fear, for we too shall join you soon.

Happily take the bullets in my hand.
Red wine poured out, trickling along the path.
Eyes wide in fear, survey the aftermath.
My knees buckle and I sink in the sand.

The slice of silver pierces my rib cage,
and the moonskin peels back, sighting my rage.

Shakily take a drag; swallow the smoke.
Own up to your sins or else die trying.
Respectfully decline the subtle joke.
Rejoice, as the time wilts and you're dying.
Yes, you are a ghost, naked and alone.

I have held love in the palm of my hand.
Sifting it through my fingers cautiously.
Holding its sweet down against my skin.
Tightening my grip, to squeeze all it has.
Lost within the confines, my world collapsed.
So, beating the door, I begin again.
Another moment, another soft sigh.
Another cycle, another way to die.
Embracing the lavender, I slip to sleep.

Frost-coated blueberries litter the garden wall.
Birds hover overhead, offering silent guffaws.
Through the looking glass the ***** observes it all.
In a nosedive the bird snags the berry in its claws.
A cheer, a screech, and it begins to rise.
But with a bang and a snap, its whole world dies.

My memory's memory will whisper your name
as our spirits take hand, drifting through stardust.
Civilizations will rise and fall, and so too shall man,
but your name will be uttered, echoed across the land.

I will sketch your eyes amongst the clouds,
Purple mountains unveil your silhouette
For a world without you is but mud on my feet.
Your beauty transcends time and my heartstrings take hold.

We find ourselves in the inky black of the night sky,
a vacuum of nothingness as far as the eye can see.
But still my imprint turns and it catches your gaze,
and whispers my love, as we journey on.

I wish that I enticed and inspired.
That your life might no longer be mundane.
I wish to see your hand pick up the pen.
Place it on the parchment, whisk me away.
But alas, this fortune I shall not find.
Whispers of the dead-end sparks only remain.
And ever cautiously I sit and stare
at the light that may have once been for me,
at the shadows that now remain in you.

Bahamut, splinter my ribs into dust.
Carve your scripture into my scalped skullcap.
Brand me with the shame of fool-hearted lust.
Tear me limb from limb in your tangled trap.
Spit my name into the annals of Hell.

Laying down on asphalt.
Burnt embers on your lips.
A taste so nostalgic.

Hands joined, baked by the sun.
Onyx speckled visage.
The crackle of lips chapped.

Whispers tickle my ear.
Your nail gently clawing.
Our hearts finally free.

"Spin the wheel!" cries the rat in his tin cage.
While the shopkeep sits, polishing his rage.

The lights cut out and I was lost.
I screamed into the void and it
screamed back
and
I really
wish this memory was not lost.
I wish
I could taste it in my ******* soul.
Instead I live.
Instead I love.
So I write this letter to my brother.
I may not remember, but I will not forget.

Please, listen.

Time dilates and your smile remains.
I dream of the day you'll hold it again.
Free the swallow from your throat.
Take my hand and put on your coat.
I guarantee, we shall find a better place.
I guarantee, we shall find a better time.

Bring me out back with a gun in your hand.
Dreary Jack stapled down to the pavement.
Cocked and loaded, smoke pouring out the frame
his head rolls gently, resting in the sand
in an instant that life came and it went,
you reloaded, looked at me, and took aim.

I may not know what the future holds.
But I love you now,
and that's good enough for me.

Honey laced milk chocolate nestled in pearls.
Onyx woven silk in ringlets and curls.
A sideways glance and the heart's string unfurls.

A kiss, a tug, and whispered words and sighs.
An enigma, a bond in blood never dies.
A moment held dear, life's ultimate prize.

As two but one, entwined, soaring free.
A trap sprung, yet we've no intent to flee.
Jodie, I love you. But do you love me?

The cobweb crusted floorboards creak
as my leg's weight crosses the earthly plane.
I breathe in and shudder, "Yes this will do."
Moonlight teases the rafter's silhouette.
It calls my name, urging me to draw near.
The fibrous snake stirs beneath my jacket,
gently leaping from within its depths.
It twists and curves looking for its new home
before wrapping tightly amongst the wood.
It drops down, and it beckons me to come.
It whispers my name as I grow closer.
It kisses my neck in a warm embrace.
Finally it grows taut and I am slain.
Never again to cause this world my pain.

Softly spoken secrets, scattered and stained.
A thorn’s thoughtful gaze casting its judgment.
There is no moral here left to be gained.
She may try, but no more shall she repent.

Seconds, minutes, brushstrokes drawing the dawn.
Each moment wasted by her hesitance.
“What does it all mean? Is it truly gone?
Or perhaps it’s just cheap happenstance.”

A facsimile. Mere memories of you.
She blinks her eyes, and greets the morning dew.

Can you ******* sincerity songbird?
Can you hear the truth quaver from my lips?
Can you smell the ash of our long gone sins?
Can you see the water welled in my eyes?
Can you touch the love, at least what remains?

I want the ash to descend upon my corpse.
Bury me where I lie, cover me in silt
forget the hearse and just let me ******* go
Why oh why must the sunset not come today?
I love you so deeply WHY AM I SO ******* AFRAID?
I will never lose this heart, this love, this dream,
but why?
Why?
Why?
Do you not understand what these words mean?

Love once
And
Never
Again

Come home
Darling.

A whispering brook drifting by my ear.
Tells me all your secrets, shows me your curse.
The songs it sings embrace this fetid earth.
Oh what I would give to rest in its depths.
Lay my head down gently, and treasure its worth.

The idle hum of crickets
Singing static in my ear.

Helium's silent snake-like hiss
cutting deep into my scars.

I look up at fading winter's star
and hold each moment
tight within my arms.

I am the culmination of your sin.
The ***** wearing your past's blood-stained furs.
Through greed, gluttony, lust,
I am what remains.
Pride, wrath, envy, sloth
all soak my skin within their reign.

I am the shadows of your teenaged rebellion.
I am the first and final bricks within the wall.
I am the ash burnt, rotting your lungs.
I am the unfired gun left rusted at your feet.
I am the final words uttered through your lips.
I am the silhouette etched in your sheets.
I am God of all that I am.
I am nothing.
I am everything.
So, please take my hand.

Tonight, I took some time to stare at the moon.
A chalk-like beacon showing the way.
Invading my shadows, invading my brain.
A foolish man, I took a smoke.
Yes, I let the parchment numb my lips.
Igniting my windpipe and returning a kiss.
I drove in circles, neverending,
Second by second crawling by.
Another drag and I'm returned to this plane
With a cough I continue to move again.
But still, there remains one thing that did not change.
Tonight, I took some time to stare at the moon.

Away at arm's length sat the window pane.
Thoughts glistened, staring into my mind's eye.
And I stared back, and whispered in hushed tones.
Nothings, noises lost to the shifting sands.

But perhaps unearthed one day we shall sit.
Hand in hand, piece by piece, we too may wilt,
but wilt together, wilt at peace, by peace.
So hush now and let us embrace the beast.

Perhaps my thoughts have come to pass
along this mildewed mile of misery.
To leave her sighing, "alas, alas..."
and hear the good times; gone in a flurry.

But bitter though this fruit may taste,
by golly by god, I'll see it through.
Using all the hardships we have faced,
this battle I'll lose, for me and you.

I sang a simple song today.
Fingers laced together,
honey-soaked marbled whispers,
lost photographs drifting down a forest creek.

Silence sank in.
Static tore at my beggar's brain.
Ink blots stained his cheek.
I looked down on him yet again.
He looked at me and smiled with relief,

and uttered

"I must ask.
Are we the lock?
Or the key?"

Alone in the dust a blind man ponders.
Ash dusting his beard, he solemnly stares.
All memories fade in constant wander.
A single wish, allow him one last care.
Please sir, please, bring her back by his bedside.
Please sir, please, just tell him she hasn't died.

He screams, an achy breath lost to the wind.
He pounds his fists and cries to the heavens.
Oh lord, in what ways must this man have sinned?
To awake this wrath-filled Armageddon?  
He does not know, he cannot say, but yet
He truly loves her, his heart's lost life's bet.

Pray for this man, in your dreams, in your sleep.
Pray for lost love you never got to keep.

At our core we may be rotten and unkind.
Unveil ourselves as beggars in the sheets.
Saving our skins and twisting vicious lies.
Greed covered, greased with idle gluttony.
Hearts of marble and minds of back-filled knives.
We ponder the future, and become its prey.
Carve out our skullcaps and set them at ease.
Nevertheless, we hold a miracle.
Despite our brutality, love remains.

The maggot-stained husk of a human nestled on my hand.
Whispered words of worry, and dauntless shades of grey.
And I bellow to the void, "Mother Mary may I be ******!"
and I swear to gods, this bit I remember to this very day
the wind spoke back, with a bitter, pain-soaked reply,
"My child, your time has come, now grow still and die."

I can still taste the scent of yesterday.
The supple marmalade within your eyes.
A half united, a half sweetly divides.
Concrete angels, hands held, spirited away.
I will begone, I will climb this rock alone.
I will pray, for my sins I must atone.

No one understands the lone *****'s song.
No one visits the grave sat in the sand.
No one covets the cancerous man's hand.
No one imagines a feeling so strong.

Remember these words, and please, wear them well.
Remember these words, and descend into hell.