I wanted to tell you.
Of all the heart aches and tearful nights I've had
and you never noticed.
Mother, I'm breaking.
Mother, I'm shaking.
Oh Mother, I'm the son you never acknowledged.
Mother this world is corrupting me.
I tried to be the good child
To live in peace and harmony and to love others with all my heart.
But I'm tearing myself apart.
I'm falling apart at the seams.
And it's all I can do to keep myself together.
Mother it's getting harder to drag myself out of bed.
Mother, I'm drinking the pain away.
Mother, I'm starting to drown.
Mother, I need someone.
Mother, please save me.
Mother... It's over. I'm through. I've had enough.
I'm damaged. They've damaged me, mother.
Good night, mother, Good bye. I love you. I'm sorry..
Only years could wash away these feelings.
because ive spent a millennia memorizing
how your eyes light up when you smile, the dimples surrounding your cheeks.
how you look down when you're flustered or ashamed.
or the way you laugh, hiding the action with your hand in front of your face.
but you're gone.
You're gone and there's not a single thing I can do to change that.
Dark and light, cool and bright,
Sun and moon, the princess and the fool.
The only story I'd wanna hear
Is the one where we could disappear
To a faraway land
With milk and honey
And if we could see the rings of Saturn,
That would be enough.
You and me
Me and you.
Black and white. Dark and light
Stark contrast of colors and emotions.
Into the heart of my soul
I wish to grow old
And live without regret
with memories I will not forget
Tomorrow is filled with chance
Love, pain, art, sadness, dance
So bring your wishes
Bring hugs and kisses
Because today is beginning
Happiness is winning
Let the morning sun
Guide you to adventure and fun!
Rising through demolition
They scream for my submission
And I refuse to lose
My identity is me.
Not my "ideas."
Not my "beliefs."
But who you see before you
Is who I am.
And not one thing you do
Will take that away from me.
Hours and hours, I paint flowers without many cowers until you came and opened my heart.
Now I'm falling apart.
I wished and hoped for forever, but we never even got together.
I was a fool.
A miserable fool filled with the illusion of love and believing you were an angel sent from above.
I loved you.
I loved you more than the soft sketches on my skin, more than the morning sun.
Now, my love, look at what you've done-
You played my heart and I played the fool.
I was a great distraction wasn't I? A wonderful tool...
I've said goodbye.
But I won't lie,
I'll never find someone like you
But if only... If only we had been true.
Not that it matters. I don't matter. It's fine and I understand that now, I was the one pushing and rushing.
You were the one ******* and fussing.
And that's fine
By the end of this rhyme
I'll find someone new.
Someone unlike you.
Sorry to disappoint you, mother, father
But I'm not your daughter
Sorry classmates, I'm not a her
I'm a sir.
I've spread these wings, I'm ready for flight
And if necessary, I'm ready to fight
I'm sick and tired of hiding
I'm through with denying
This is me
I will be true to my heart
Nothing will shatter my pride apart.
I'm a boy. I'm a man.
And someday family, I hope you understand.
I wrote this and I'm gonna start posting more trans and queer related stuff woo!
Those who know me, have read the words I've written in black ink and can physically see me
Have told me
Though my writing is depressing
And my suicidal thoughts obsessing
Have mentioned that glimmer of hope that hides behind my demons screeching inside
I feel like Pandora at times
While darkness reigns the depths of my mind,
I'm letting go of that hope.
There's nothing for me,
Because I'm nothing and the only thing that will fulfill me is the fact that one day I'll stop breathing.
Sad and boujee
Slow soft melodies
Floating from the sound
Of your lovely voice
Is the sweetest music
That's ever passed my ears.
And I put my brush down
Because I know that
I'll never create anything
Half as wonderful as you.
But I'll try as I paint your eye
And forge this picture in my mind
That someday you'll find
The love you lost for yourself
And you'll be at ease, darling.
You'll be the person you
Want to be.
I love you
I love you so
I love you so much
And I'd give the world
To make you smile
So darling please, realize
You're worth more than all of
Hades' wealth and the galaxies
Realize, you're precious to me
So many amazing people don't realize how much more they truly are... It makes me sad sometimes to think about it
They've clipped my wings, darling
I want to soar through the heavens
And land in your arms
Like old times
But I'm earth bound and alone
Miles away from your love
I'll find a way,
No matter the cost.
No matter the length.
Even if it takes me a millennia,
I'll find my way back to you,
Listening to I love you so by the Walters and in my feels ****
She's never thought she was beautiful
She saw beauty in everything
From the tall pines
To the withered down bricks on the side of our home.
She saw beauty in me
She encouraged and supported me,
When no one else dared.
All I've ever wanted was for her to love herself as much as I do.
Because she's shown me so much along the years,
From what it means to love and be loved,
To how it feels to run my hand down her hair,
And have a true promise of eternity.
I hold her tight through the nights
And chase her fears away
As she does for me.
And I will love her until the day comes
Where we're withered and gray
And the feeling of her insecurities go away.
And even after our final breaths,
I'll love her after death
The rising anxiety
Flares my insecurity.
I clear my throat,
The words just
won't come out right.
And I stutter and avoid
Staring at my audience
And I bit my lip,
Of memorizing my topic
Only to forget it
Right on the spot.
I gather my courage and do my best
I finish my presentation
And they clap politely
And the relief is my refuge as I sit
With something of pride in my eyes.
Pretty sure everyone cab relate to feeling really nervous while presenting a presentation
"Are you okay?"
Some ask while I fall into shambles
Am I okay?
I ask myself as I tear my flesh apart
"You look so tired..."
Some say as they look at me, concerned.
"Didn't get much sleep."
I try to smile and mumble.
So utterly exhausting as my pillow bears more of my tears,
Staining it's soft fabric.
Drops of salt and water, how I cling
To this pillow and wonder
Why I'm always alone when I cry.
But who knows
and who cares.
"I'm a boy," he mutters away from the others and winced as he looked in a mirror, his reflection not what he wanted.
"I'm a boy," he said quietly, almost ashamed to say as he came out to his best friend.
"I'm a boy." Tears filled his eyes as he announced to his parents, surprised when they accepted him fully.
"I'm a boy." He can proudly say, years after he had kept it all in, he can show who he truly is.
Just a small story of an accepted boy
A soft sigh escapes my lips
My fingers run around across the sheets
Of a springy bed
This home is not a home
As things are thrown
And screaming is heard through the walls
And I can feel my mother crying
And my little sister clutches onto me
Asking me why daddy's mad.
I have to be strong for her
I can't let her know that our father
Isn't all there.
"He's just tired," I tell her
And sing her a lullaby
In small hopes that when she grows,
She won't remember theses days and
That our father will be okay...
That smile isn't real, is it darling?
How you put a front up to impress those around you
How you long for them to love you.
But I can see right through you.
As your mascara runs, was it worth it?
Was it worth all your time, all your effort, sacrificing your identity to please them?
When all along you just wanted to be accepted
So you left your individuality
And fled your beautiful reality
To blend in, well you've done it
You've become one of them.
But you no longer feel free
Oh, darling, is this what you wanted to be?
Just a little something that came to mind while talking to an old friend.
The water is clear
Unlike my mind.
It's murky, foggy, and
as my hand touches the surface,
Breaking the perfection
And I sigh as my face
reflected back to me
How I wish I could be lovely
Like the setting sun
Or the endless oceans
And I feel my face plunge
Forward into the water.
Struggling to breath underwater
The liquid fills my nostrils
And I've drowned
But out of self loathing
Rather than unconditional
Not everyone drowns themselves in love
'This is bad,' I think
And in a blink
Your smile fades
To a cold gray
And I swallow hard
As you turn to leave
And I want to scream and
find a way,
A way to make you stay.
But you're out of reach
And my heart pounds
To the steps you take
And I feel like I'm going
I just want to stare at the ceiling
While music blasts into my ears
And colors spill from my ribs
And the world dissolves around me
With the image of who you used to be
Taking control of my mind.
Where did you go, my love?
The closer we get
the farther you seem.
My heart pounds from
And you're smiling
that sad smile.
Your eyes twinkle,
my breath hitches
But oh my gods
im falling in love all over again.
The lines smear
On a sheet
of notebook paper
Is a cup of coffee
Waiting to be devoured
What am I doing?
Slow breaths mixed with secret smiles.
A galaxy of stars over our heads
The planets align in our hearts
We float through the milky way.
With total ease, just you and me
Me and you, leaving this world out of the blue.
We soar past the meteor belt
Far past Jupiter, whizzing by Neptune
Soon the beauty of our universe is gone.
its just you and me.
At the edge of our celestial body
— The End —