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677 · Nov 2018
Addicted to you
Iska Nov 2018
Ragged breaths
Dilated eyes
The sweet truth
The hazy lie
Breathy laughter
Loving the high
Sensual embrace
As I chase
After you
Addicted
through and through
673 · Oct 2017
The Shadow Warrior
Iska Oct 2017
I am not the brilliant leader, I am the fearless dreamer.
I am not the one with all the facts, I complete all silent acts.
I am a shadows face, quite often out of place.
I am not a standout individual, in fact I'm quite invisible.
The shadow warrior, on a hidden battlefield.
My secrets, my stories, remain concealed.
I am not an overachiever, I am a firm believer.
I believe in loyalty, spirit and trust,
someone to fight for you, dawn til' dusk.
I am not a shining knight, riding off into glorious battle,
I am but a lowly soldier, fighting a raging war.
A war against your demons, the ones you fight inside,
a war against your fears, the ones that make you hide.
And still, my fight remains unseen, there is no one to witness.
And this is because,
I am the shadow warrior, the soldier who remains unseen.
And while you openly worship your heroes,
your heroes silently worship me.
626 · Jun 2018
Stormy Sea
Iska Jun 2018
Free as the wind,
Changeable as the sea,
The beach holds memories,
Of you and me.
Sands that shift
changing our lives
Sunlight glints,
blinding eyes.
Oh free spirit spread your wings
And fly above this stormy sea.
Far as the winds will carry you
To wherever the moonlight leads you
May the blush of dawn bless you
May the fire that burns inside
never flicker or die.
May the stars bare witness
As you chase the horizon
And fly above the clouds,
Over the sea and
To the place where your home may be.
And When you have found your place among the stars
There you shall wait for me.
Kissed by the mornings dawn
Blessed with the fiery sea.
Free spirit spread your wings
And one day return to the beach with me.
For Juliee,
May you never face the stormy sea alone.
618 · Oct 2017
Ode
Iska Oct 2017
Ode
An ode to a girl I used to know, whose world was a gift  all wrapped up with a pretty red bow. Who knew not pain nor sorrow and sin. Ready for this life she was destined to win.

An ode to a girl I used to know, whose family rules made a line she kept to a toe. Testing herself through ignorance and sin, learning to pick herself back up again.

An ode to a girl I used to know, who learned to love the sinners row. All wrapped up in a disorientating mist, it was the devil's lips she longed to kiss.

An ode to the girl I used to know, who continued along with the devil in tow, until one day instead of a kiss.... it was Death's angel that touched her lips. A secret sorrow she left unknown,
a grave, she had wished, was her own.

An ode to a girl I used to know, who now lives so far from home, marching as one well oiled machine, hoping to pass through life, unseen. As a last stitch effort to stand apart, she only accomplished to break her parents hearts.

An ode to a girl I used to know, whose love was found in a secret best left alone. All I shall say is it shot her heart when her lover decided they were better apart.

An ode to a girl I used to know, whose families disappointment seemed to grow. A failure at love and life and smarts, trying to mend a shattered families heart.

An ode to a girl I used to know, who played Russian Roulette and lived to feel the survival guilt flow. She was the one who dared to live, after shooting so many in the heart again and again.

An ode to a girl I used to know, whose overdose seemed awfully close. Though tempting seemed, the pills may be, she continued on, with the weight of her life buckling her knees.

An ode to a girl I used to know, whose siblings left behind in the blow. And as her wounds smarted and her cuts began to sting, she gave her siblings the last gift she could bring. A freedom from her world of fear, a sacrifice to remain behind, here.

An ode to a girl I used to know, who was kicked out of her very home. Whom pain and sadness have tormented and torn apart, leaving her unsure if she still had a heart.

An ode to a girl I used to know, who walked this world all alone, who bore the scars that marred her skin, as she vowed to never, herself, love again.

An ode to a girl I know, who looks in the mirror, as if the reflection is not her own. All sunken eyes and cracking fears she lives and breaths but is no longer here. But a husk she remains, haunting her very own marred skin, wondering what it would be like to feel again...

An ode to a girl I have yet to know, who's future once shined brighter than any I have come to find, I know, because that future was once mine. now it is drifting, balanced by a drop of the hat, a slice of the knife, where nothing is planned or precise. All that she has is the hope of her fate, that maybe, some day, she will be free of her self inflicted chains of hate and fly free of this place, a chance to change her future, her fate.
611 · Nov 2017
Wandering Souls.
Iska Nov 2017
we are the lost souls,
wandering this lonely world,
searching for each other,
for the place where our dreams
collide with reality.
we are the dreamers,
daring to look to the sky
knowing in our veins
we are destined to fly.
we are born of storm and wind and fire.
created from chaos we are
meant to rattle the stars
we will bow to no one
apologize for nothing
and answer to none
save for the pounding
of our wild hearts.
carved from diamond
we are unbreakable,
with the taste of forever on our tongues
we burn so bright that the sun grows envious  
we will never be chained,
refuse to be contained
and may the gods help those
who dare to tie us down
for you cannot tame
that which is wild and free,
therefore you will never tame me.
597 · Oct 2018
Writers Block
Iska Oct 2018
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CANT
THINK
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577 · Jan 2019
The Misplaced Grave
Iska Jan 2019
There once was a girl
Sitting all alone
Beside a grave
She wished
Was her own.

And as she shuddered
And gasped for breath
She realized
all she longed for

Was death.

“Silly girl”
Death said to me
“How can you exist
So selfishly?”

“For her to die
And you to live
Is the curse that
You deserve”

And as I lay there
In a pool
of blood
And tears
I realize the truth

It’s not my place

Not to live
And not to die
Not to give up
And not to try

It’s not my air to breathe
And yet who am I to deny
It’s not my food to eat
Yet how can I not?

How can I waste
What was hers to claim?
And how can I die
When she lays in my grave?

She didn’t deserve it
But I...
I do
And so I am forced
To consume her food.

It’s not my air to breathe
It’s not my place to greave
It’s not my food to consume
It’s not my life to remove
I am to blame
569 · Sep 2020
Sinking bubbles
Iska Sep 2020
There is a forest,
Under the sea,
To which I desperately
Long to see.
I’m back :) been ages
568 · Nov 2017
My loving mother
Iska Nov 2017
My dearest mother




















do you see it?
that's the space put between us,
filled with unspoken words and heartache.










can you hear it?
that's the defining silence,
filled with quiet disappointment and shattered dreams,
because I'm not the girl you hoped I'd be...
568 · Jan 2018
Nighttide
Iska Jan 2018
It is easy to love and laugh under the sun.
It is at night when the challenge will come.
The sun's rays keep the darkness at bay
But what's to protect you at the end of the day?
When the darkness consumes your world?
When your thoughts begin to spin and swirl?
The stars shine both cold and bright,
Bathing my moonburnt tears in earthereal light.
The moon turns my skin to marble and glass
And the ground I walk on turns to ash.
Such crule beauty that does reside
When the dark makes the light subside.
561 · Dec 2018
Frozen bubble
Iska Dec 2018
Starring at the world
through a fractured freeze frame
Splintering my skin as I draw closer clawing to the faded paint only to end up on the other side
To a world as bland and gray as it was on the other side.
555 · Jan 2019
Life
542 · Jul 2019
Wishing weeds
Iska Jul 2019
Wisps of whispered words float away on the wind
Up to the moon like dust on the stars
And nothing is more beautiful
then when I look at you
Wishes slip past my lips
and much like dandelion seeds taken root in the sidewalk  
they grow,
and sprout without me noticing,
not until they have become white plumes to be blown and carried away by the wind. Dancing and floating free to the horizon
they carry the wishes of a silent soul

So long as you are here
I can do anything
With your fingers entwined in mine
I can hold my head high
And dance like a wishing **** on the wind
541 · Feb 2018
Eyes That Lie
Iska Feb 2018
A chance encounter,
from cross the way.
If you had spoken,
what would you say?

My eyes darted to yours,
Though they were disguised,
I thought for sure what they saw
was a lie.

Should I have smiled?
Should I have cried?
Instead I looked on,
For I couldn't decide.

Could you read the words
that I can't find?
Read them in my sunlit eyes?

Does distance and time
obscure your sight?
Or is it that I didn't
say the words quite right?

Should I have yelled?
Should I have screamed?
I couldn't tell,
For nothing is as it seems.

My heart beat faster
what is it I feared?
I continued to walk
as if nothing was amiss
But my mind wasn't clear.

I know it's not fair,
To ask who your with
But I can't help but wounder
Was I so easily replaced?

You seemed so happy,
So bright and alive.
To take that away..
Is not my place to decide.

Should I have kept walking?
Should I never have looked?
But I couldn't help it.

She was quite pretty,
Your new little friend
And I'm glad that your happy.

Because we were only just friends.
Yes.
Not star-crossed lovers
But the best of friends.

But that doesn't stop me
from missing you,
It doesn't make me not want to cry,
It can't hold back
the dread of replacement,
Or the jealousy at
the spark in your eyes.

I used to make you laugh like that,
It was my job to make you grin
I held the title best friend
With pride,
Is it hers now to win?

We all speak of lovers
And hearts that won't repair.
Yet when it comes to
the parting of friends,
I doubt it could compare.

The timeless days
that slipped away.
The giddy grins
And thoughtless things
That make up a
flawlessly flawed friend
Is what we miss dearly in the end.
It's not just breakups that cause us to break
538 · Sep 2020
Temptation
Iska Sep 2020
Today a devil
crept from the shadows
and whispered in my ear
“you are simply not strong enough to survive the storm.”
So I looked her in the eyes
with a set jaw and steel for eyes and whispered back
“darling can’t you tell? I am made of stars and storms and you are simply not strong enough to survive ME”
524 · Jul 2019
How easily we fit the mold.
Iska Jul 2019
I have always advocated that we must push beyond merely existing. We must live. Unapologetically. With out hesitation or reservations. “To be the spark that ignites the fire within all we cross paths with.”
How foolishly hopeful that seems now.
I have become exactly what I despised.
Fallen into the lull that is stagnation. Hushed by the silence of acceptance and helplessness that has draped over my existence.
With no hobbies or goals to speak of I have seemed to lose the drive to burn like a flame. And worse yet, I cannot seem to convince myself that it is something I can escape, or that I should even attempt to break out of this trance.
I had fancied myself to be unique. Fearless to the rules that society has placed in attempt to squish us into the mold of complacency. When really, I have been fooling myself all along.
Right now, as I am,
I am not unique.
I am not brave.
519 · Sep 2020
Passion
Iska Sep 2020
Meanwhile I’ve just sat by and wrote poems about her passion pretending it was my own. Little did I know, a seed was planted and she was watering it as it grew into a dream I never knew that I had buried.
502 · Apr 2019
The crash
Iska Apr 2019
The world is teetering
Tethered by a withered string
And gravity is pulling it taught

And now it’s crashing
Louder and louder
The shards splinter my skin
And rivulets of blood
Turns to rivers

You hear a sigh
Of relief
Of regret
Of release
As you find me
Drowning in a pool of my blood
A broken story
Old as time
You dream to live
I long to die
500 · Dec 2017
SOS
Iska Dec 2017
SOS
Sos
Shining
On
Smiles
Sos

I am sinking, yet I don't have a ship to sink
I'm drowning, yet I do not have lungs to breath
I'm alone, yet I know I am loved
I love, yet I feel so numb
I'm mute, yet I can't stop talking
I'm talking, yet I have no voice
I have no voice, yet still you hear
I don't deserve you, yet you won't leave
You won't leave, yet I still fear.
Why is it like this?
I love you. And I know you love me..
So why can't we bask in peaceful simplicity?
Why must it be muddled with muck?
Why do I feel so stuck?
I should be happy.
I should be proud.
Yet I'm sitting here,
And this silence is way to loud.
"Crawling in the dark for you
Do you Burn amoung stars for me?"


Sos
Screaming
On
Silent
Sos
488 · Sep 2020
Sunsets
Iska Sep 2020
The sunset was the kind that was like syrup dripping from the skies and if you were to drink it it would be the ambrosia that tasted like a life time
479 · May 2019
Liar Liar
Iska May 2019
I hate that I am eating.
I hate every bite, every swallow.
I hate every taste, every wrapper.
I hate the bile that raises in the back of my throat every time
I try to consume food.
I am so so very sick of it all.
So sick of needing to be high to even want to eat.
So sick of the feeling of being full
And I hate my need to be rid of it.
Of trying to force it to stay down
But secretly wishing that my ***** will drown me.
I hate myself when I do *****.
But I hate myself so much more when I don’t.
But they say I’m pretty
But they say I’m better
So why is it so hard
When every swallow is burning me alive
And every ***** makes me a liar.
And every skipped meal makes me a coward.
471 · Sep 2020
Sister, dear
Iska Sep 2020
There was a girl I loved
But that girl is no longer here.
She had a nerve of steel
Yet was bound by her fear.
Her hair was silken gold
Her eyes alight with passion

But then... she turned cold.
And form that moment on
The girl I loved was gone.

But then as it always will
The universe caught her soul
And breathed her back to life
And I met the girl
Who had been set free

And I realized
that while the girl I loved
Was now no longer here
This woman that she’s become
Is the one to be revered.

He soul is filled with stars
Her smile like the spring
Her nerve of steel remained
And her heart was still the same
You have grown in the best way possible
469 · Dec 2018
Cookie Cutter
Iska Dec 2018
You stick us all together
And declare we are the same
As if we all don’t have a different
Tolerance to pain
466 · Dec 2018
Paper cut
Iska Dec 2018
I feel as if I have paper skin
Fire for eyes and water
that swirls And sloshes inside.
And the water is rotting my moldy skin as it begins to douse the fire within.
448 · Dec 2017
The Deafening Silence
Iska Dec 2017
They say that death is quiet. That it comes so fast and sudden that it is a surprise to the world. Because the world keeps going, as if it never happened.

I disagree. I have never known a silent death in my life. For me, death is so loud, that it deafens me. Until all I hear is ringing and muffled sounds. Like a bomb just went off, and in a way, I guess it had. The world moves to a slow motion until it is measured by nothing but a heart beat, and even that will stop eventually. Until your breath gives out and your knees crumple before you. "Its beautiful" they say, "the way that life and death entwines in an eternal dance." Yes. This is beautiful, me lying here beside you as you struggle for life, fighting to keep your heart beating. I watch as fear consumes you, you don't want to die, that much is plain to see, because you think your too young. Well let me inform you of something. You will ALWAYS be too young. It will never be enough because you don't know what happens next. For some it is a relief, they hope that this is it, the end of the line. That they cease to exist. Those are the ones who live life they way the want to. Or their are those of you who dread and fear it. Believing that God is waiting on the other side. Those are the ones who live their lives doing good, trying to make it to heaven. And then their are those of you who push it aside. Who hide from the fact that one day your hear, then gone the next. You are the ones who live in mediocre boredom forever chained down by your fear, as you waste away inside of these four paper walls, in front of the screen of some form.

I am here to remind you that I exist. I am death. I am release to some and horror to others. And I am here to tell you that your time is fast approaching. I may be at your doorstep right now, or I may be waiting on the sidelines for years to come. But I am here. And one day you will find me beside you, embracing you as you fight to keep your fire burning. You may evade me once or twice but you will see me one day. And I shall ask you this, have you lived as you wanted to live? Or have you squandered away your days? Will you be remembered? And if so how? Will people laugh and say "you won't be missed" or will they wail and pull at their hair, gnashing their teeth as they cry for their loss? Are you loved or hated?  if you are loved, you shall not be forgotten, and that is the immortality you are all seeking, just as my immortality is here, among the words I write. Who knows? By the time your reading this, maybe I have passed to. Because even death is not immortal.
436 · Oct 2017
Deaths Angel
Iska Oct 2017
Boiling blood,
Dagger eyes.
Hateful mind,
Both cruel and sly.

Brave façade,
Daunting lies.
You look to me,
"Its time to die."

I hear you,
And watch
you scream
And plea.
Yet its not anger
That i see,
Only...

Aching muscles,
Tired eyes.
A weary heart,
A mournful sigh.

"Hush my child,
Its not time yet.
If you do this now,
There's much you'll regret."

Shallow breaths,
Teary eyes.
Shaking hands,
You sob and cry.

"Can't you see?"
Again you plea..
"Its time to die.
Nothing left for me."

I look on,
And I feel your sorrow.
A broken heart,
With no hope for tomorrow

"Be calm my child,
Just look around.
With a bit of effort
Happiness can be found."

"You don't understand!
How can you know?
Who are you to decide
When I'm ready to go?"

Bleeding smiles,
Plastic masks.
Hidden scars,
You've gone too far.

"Be careful my child,
Or you will be consumed
And then there will be
Nothing more I can do."

Sun kissed smiles,
Moon burnt laughs.
Bright future,
Dark past.

Wedding bells,
Pure love.
White shells,
Caged dove.

Sticky hands,
Tiny feet.
Sloppy kisses,
Hearts complete.

Weary smiles,
Wizened eyes.
Snow kissed hair,
You've grown wise.

Calmly you stand,
Before me once again.
With a full heart,
A long life.
With Faded scars,
And smile lines.
I hear you repeat,
A long lost line,
With a sad smile,
"Its time to die"

I greet you,
Arms open wide,
Embraced in me
You quietly die.
And as you fade,
I hear you say...
"Thank you,
For helping me
Hold on til today."
436 · Feb 2018
Effortless friendship
Iska Feb 2018
Misplaced smiles, awkward laughs,
The silence stretches on for miles.
Wandering eyes, shuffling feet,
Something's missing, incomplete.
What happened to the brighter days?
When hours seemed to slip away?
Now the seconds are more like years,
And minutes seem like eons of fears.
I miss you dearly, this I know,
But I wounder if it's you I miss,
Or something I created, romanticized,
Either way, it seems so faded,
What happened to the friendship we so effortlessly created?
431 · May 2018
Happy...
Iska May 2018
One slips down
Smile lasts a little longer

Two slip down with a gulp
Now I am giddy and feeling stronger.

Three go down one after another
Now I wonder
have you noticed me stutter?

Four go down
And maybe one more...

Five go down with a gurgle
I wonder..
When do I start feeling alive?

Six is a struggle
But it’s worth the trouble

Seven go down
Yet I still drown

Better be eight
And you won’t feel the hate

Then goes nine
To feel this time...

Ten go down
And I start to D R O W N
In giggles and gurgles
In chimes and rhymes
In sad and hate
In numbing pain

Happy pills why do I still feel the same?
428 · Oct 2017
One little pill
Iska Oct 2017
One
Oh what fun this has become.
Two
So much life in me and you!
Three
So this is what it means to be free?
Four
Maybe one more behind closed doors....
Five
I can't quit, without it I don't feel alive...
Six
"You need to stop, your addicted and soon it'll be too late to fix"
Seven
"Do you wish to die? Because we both know that's where your headed."
Eight
More then just pills, they are an escape. An escape from all this depression and hate.
Nine
You've changed, you've taken it too far. How could you be so blind?
Ten
The monitor goes silent, your heart stops it's beat, never to start again.
412 · May 2018
A melody Of Melancholy
Iska May 2018
.
.
.
.
.
.
Can you hear it?
This sweet and sorrowful serenade?
This melody of melancholy.






Of course you can’t,
How selfishly presumptuous of me.
To assume you see the solitude I see
Day after day
.
.
.
.
.
.
404 · Apr 2019
Fuzzy Fades, but Scars Stay
Iska Apr 2019
I feel so foggy
Limbs feel heavy
Thoughts feel thick
Eyelids stick
I don’t feel sick
So it must be ok..
No matter the way
Self medicate
To placate
This morbid mirror
This demonic fear
403 · Sep 2020
Perspective
Iska Sep 2020
Life is all about perception. The people we meet, the memories we create, the chances we take. Every story is a thread. And every thread is, in some way or another, attached to a different string of threads. This goes on and on until it all weaves together into a massive tapestry that is our reality. Therefore, to you, I am only as you perceive me to be. no more, no less.

I’ve met many a person who picked up my threads and twirled them around, claiming to recognize the colors and the feeling of the strings in their hands, only to realize what they thought was purple, was green all along and they simply felt cotton when it was actually a mess of silks and twine. All those threads they believed were theirs to hold through out all of time, belonged to no one at all, because they were mine.

And so too have I met, the quiet few, who glanced at the threads we weave with our lives and instantly knew, there was no “mine” or “theirs” or “you” because perception is blind and we are all new. Not one story is the same, and yet not one is unique, for we are all the same tapestry
and I am the you, that you seek.
I am only as to perceive me to be.
Who are you?
398 · Jan 2018
Pressed flower
Iska Jan 2018
If you cracked me open, would you watch me bleed?
When you cut through my disguise, what do you see?
Will you leave me alone, to wilt and wither away,
Or will you save the bloom to last another day?
397 · Jun 2018
Indifferent
Iska Jun 2018
Boys or girls,
to the bathroom scale we all look the same.
Muscle or fat
the numbers won’t change.
Pair shaped, square shaped
the mirror will show it all, and the broken soul will count the flaws...
390 · Jan 2018
The Sad Little Man
Iska Jan 2018
My life is just like anyone elses ya know.
The alarm goes and you wake up.
You get dressed,
You eat.
Go for a morning stroll and
basically you go about your normal day,
The difference was
I was not like every one else.
There was always...
something else around.
This... Sadness.
I was living on the edge of existance,
Waiting for time to catch up with me.
Always chasing after beautiful things,
Only to fall out of reach.
At times this sadness,
this... monster was small,
At other times,
it surrounded me in it's darkness,
And occasionally...
It consumed me completely.
But it was always there,
Watching me,
Waiting for me to slip,
To break,
To completely fall apart.
And after awhile....
it seemed like it just might happen.
This sad little man almost won.
Until I met you.
It was like suddenly,
I found out I've been missing out on.
And I found it in you.
You saved me that day.
You sheltered me from my monsters
You kept me safe while I was lost in the dark.
And without you I am no more than
the sad little man in my head,
but with you I am a girl who is free.
I think that we all have a sad little man prancing around in our pretty little heads.
Some are big, and others small.
Some are darker than the inky night
And others shine in the sun's light.
But it's always there in all of us
And some of us see ours more than others.
So be careful because one day you may be taunting someone under control of their sad little man
Only to find the next day your sad little man will be haunting you.
388 · Apr 2018
Missing you
Iska Apr 2018
I find myself missing you,
Your company and friendship,
All the little things that make you..
Well, you.
384 · Mar 2018
The pain of the living
Iska Mar 2018
I amBOLD
I am STRONG
I am HAPPY
Nothing is WRONG

I am BEAUTIFUL
I am GLASS
I am RESILIENT
I live through the CRACKS

I am splinterig
I’m Falling apart
I am shattering
My splintered old heart

I am faint
I am frail
Am I even here?
Who can tell?

I am a flicker
A faint blur
Is this pain worth it?
I’m no longer so sure
376 · Aug 2018
What if?
Iska Aug 2018
What do you think would happen
If I decided I no longer care?
Not for the smile I show
Nor for my need of air?
My pearly whites line in a row
And the pain inside slowly starts to show..
375 · Oct 2017
Seize The Day
Iska Oct 2017
Do you have what it takes?
Is it burning inside?
A warriors heart,
a leaders mind?
Now is the time, lead the way.
Ride off to battle, seize the day.
They look to you, your spotlight shines,
so push on through, test your lines.

You've got what it takes,
I see it inside;
a warrior's passion,
a leader's pride.
you've got the heart, you've got the soul,
you've got the will, so take control.
Don't ever break, don't you dare walk away.
finish what you've started, seize the day.

You've got the skills,
they lay inside;
a warrior's dedication,
a leader's determination.
you've got nothing to lose, step up to the plate.
Fight in the battle, before its too late.

Though lose, you may,
the chance still stands,
to lead with victory's upper hand.
to fight your way, and in the end,
to seize the day.
372 · Sep 2018
Pain-ters
Iska Sep 2018
Scattered words
Broken frame
Was once a lovely picture
Now just faded paint.
360 · Oct 2017
Together We Rage Louder
Iska Oct 2017
You always think of yourself as the storm,
and I've come to believe I am as well.
Together we are our storm,
And everyone will always tell us we are
terrible for each other because of it..
But together I want to brave this chaotic storm with you.
We will be a chaotic beautiful mess of a storm together,
even if we tear everything apart along the way.
357 · Sep 2020
Adopted
Iska Sep 2020
I was a broken branch grafted onto a different family tree.
357 · Sep 2020
Grow
Iska Sep 2020
All things grow. I want to be the catalyst to so many things. To be the spark that breaths the fire back into your lungs. I want to entice others to chase their biggest dreams. I want to be the spark that ignites your soul. To cause you to fall in love with life it’s self.
Burn so bright you can't remember what the dark felt like
349 · Oct 2017
Portraits
Iska Oct 2017
So many portraits of people i once knew,
so many opportunities that i blew.
i think about them nearly every day,
but some i wish, would fade away.

broken fragments of the past,
so much love that never lasts.
scattered memories frozen in time,
a shiny picture, a beautiful lie.

Variations of time long past,
i left them at the bay, when i let loose the mast.
i think about them nearly every day,
but some i wish, would fade away.

Its a beautiful painting, as old as time,
heartache and pain mixed in with the die.
scattered memories frozen in time,
a shiny picture, a beautiful lie.


plenty of love, plenty of heartache,
I'm still alive, no need to remake.
i think about them nearly every day,
but some i wish, would fade away.

can you see beyond this splintered frame?
these bleeding smiles among the colorful array.
scattered memories frozen in time,
a shiny picture, a beautiful lie.

All of the time that has passed with them,
don't compare to you, my one and only gem.
now those old memories remain portraits.

when im with you, these colors glow,
i can put down the camera,
leave the pictures alone.
as pieces of a broken past...
ready to find happiness at last.

I thought about them nearly every day...
scattered memories frozen in time,
but when im with you they fade away...
that shiny picture, the beautiful lie.

because when im with you.....
because when im with you,
the world just shines.
This was written by two people. Not just me, but my best friend Raiden Crow as well. We wrote it together a while back. And I just had to share.
348 · Jul 2019
Mortality is a fickle thing
Iska Jul 2019
Can I tell you a secret?

I am terrified of death.
Think about it, before I was born,
How many lives had ended?
How many names were forgotten?
How many stories never made the history books?
So many people have come before me, and yet it is as if they had never existed at all. so many lives will follow mine, and will never know I was here.
Because even as they come to an end... the world will just keep going. Unhindered by the loss. She will not pause just because I stopped going.. no, Earth will continue to turn on its axis as She always has, without favoritism or prejudice. Unending and uncaring. And let’s face it, what have I ever done to deserve otherwise? What changes have I undertaken for the better? I have nothing to show, when this is all over. Undeserving of the immortality that memories create.
347 · Feb 2020
Wilting
Iska Feb 2020
It’s so weird... discovering how fragile ones mentality is...I have always expressed that it’s ok to need to live for something else when you can’t find the ability to live for yourself. So you do your best to build stability and optimism all while you feel like you are shattering one crack at a time.  So what were to happen if what you are living for is jeopardized? Would you break completely or simply find something else to live for? What if it was the ONLY thing that you could live for in that moment? At times when I cannot bare to live for myself I live for my plants. They would not survive without me therefore I must keep going or they would not make it. The problem for living for something that’s alive is what would happen if that thing were to die? If the petals were to wilt and the stems drop and the flowers fade? What happens when your life has crashed and imploded at catastrophic proportions and the only thing to survive the disaster turns out to be dying? When every thing is going wrong and you are shattering one crack at a time and all you can live for are your plants then a massive crack splits you into a thousand little pieces and the only thing holding you together has began to shrivel along with your mentality. What am I to do now?
336 · Oct 2017
Im fine.
Iska Oct 2017
I am a liar
I'm not "OK"
its a painful mask i bare
behind my smile is a broken heart
behind my laugh I'm falling apart
look closely at me and you shall see
the girl i am, isn't me.
Everyday i smile
and act like nothings wrong,
its called putting everything aside,
and simply being strong.
and now i wear this smile i don't believe in,
inside i feel like screaming.
we carry these things inside of us,
that no one else can see,
they hold us down like anchors,
they drown us out at sea.
I did my best to try and be
the mirror of society,
but we both the mirrors cracked,
and everybody's in the act.
so with torn and bleeding hearts we smile,
and force a bubbly laugh,
hoping that no one can see the truth behind our masks
but there's a monsters in the mirror,
and when I lean close,
she comes nearer,
she looks into my eyes and sees my fear,
"hush" she whispers,
"your the only one who knows I'm here."
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