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"unworthiness" poems
I may write about you I may think about you But it doesn't mean That I still dream about you Or that I still want you I don't even think it means that I love you These poems These extra ramblings Are my way of ridding my spirit of your toxic presence I'm liberating myself of the constant feeling of rejection I'm relieving myself of the tremendous feelings of guilt But most of all I'm shedding away all of the feelings of unworthiness and ugliness that you caused me to feel You ripped me in two These poems get rid of the brokenness While I attempt to puzzle myself back together You left me a mess That's how I know you're not the best I'm moving on now And you'll be sorry Because there will come a time When you'll really need me
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Dec 23, 2013
Dec 23, 2013 at 1:12 PM UTC
Moving On
Your mind is an abyss sated with emptiness,spore of an ink-jet, the heart is erupting with repugnant repulsiveness. Your conscience ravage by your impulsive act. You indulge in savagery shackled by misery creativity is a mystery . You diverged from an honest life and now you're perjuring in art you dark-prowlers. Converged with parasites marauding, Proud-Writers. Cursed with uncertainty you're embracing lies, in the realm of thieves there's a decaying crown.
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Sep 6, 2014
Sep 6, 2014 at 4:41 AM UTC
worthy of Unworthiness
Everything in my body is weary, my bones don't feel like mine anymore, or real anymore, just simple slugs in my limbs begging me to move slowly and slime upon everything. I'd rather hide in my sweater than face the world today, and I daren't try to hide my yawns and my sullen, sunken face, bare to the world that I am broken and sad today. I want to be asleep, where I have a chance of waking up and this being gone. But I cannot do that, not yet, I must fight and live to die another day. How somber. My hair is a frizzy mess and my makeup must be a disaster, I am sure. The lights dance just out of reach, out of touch, out of my way as i wander along the lonely dark path today has for me. Tomorrow. I want tomorrow, where I can sleep and dream and beg for a life more than my own, to beg for some magic that will magic away these feelings of sorrow and unworthiness. I just want to be better. At least my sweater keeps my cold heart warm.
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Jan 22, 2015
Jan 22, 2015 at 12:28 PM UTC
Sweater
A Kiss Is Not a Kiss A kiss is not just a kiss …A kiss can be the key That unlocks Love Life And countless of other Limitless Possibilities A kiss is not just a kiss …A kiss can be the cure For loneliness Unworthiness It can be Confidence For the unsure A kiss is not just a kiss …A kiss can be Recognition That you deserve love That you deserve life It gives you Permission So until you find someone That will show you Love And Affection ...Look in the mirror And blow a kiss To your own Beautiful Deserving Reflection
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Jan 6, 2013
Jan 6, 2013 at 12:31 AM UTC
A Kiss Is Not a Kiss
O, from what power hast thou this powerful might With insufficiency my heart to sway? To make me give the lie to my true sight, And swear that brightness doth not grace the day? Whence hast thou this becoming of things ill, That in the very refuse of thy deeds There is such strength and warrantise of skill That, in my mind, thy worst all best exceeds? Who taught thee how to make me love thee more, The more I hear and see just cause of hate? O, though I love what others do abhor, With others thou shouldst not abhor my state. If thy unworthiness raised love in me, More worthy I to be beloved of thee.
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Sonnet 150: O From What Power Hast Thou This Powerful Might
all the oil is gone from the gulf all we have to worry about are vampires YOU GO AWAY FOR A DAY AND WHAT IS HERE? VAMPIRES....AGAIN simple images of ourselves and what we do to eachother images of our false love disquised as imagry....in imaginary terms YOU GO AWAY FOR A DAY AND WHAT IS HERE? VAMPIRES....AGAIN you try to truly love but the "people" want VAMPIRES to **** their stinking blood and give them excuses for the blood they **** YOU GO AWAY FOR A DAY AND WHAT IS HERE? VAMPIRES....AGAIN AND LOVERS.....AS SUCH come beyong the imaginary grief we feel beyond the imaginary images of revenge that thrill us to the core of our unworthiness beyond the death we worship we are truly dead YOU GO AWAY FOR A DAY AND WHAT IS HERE? VAMPIRES....AGAIN and so sad to say WE ARE HERE VAMPIRES! ******* death as such pretending that the oil is gone from the gulf!
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Sep 7, 2010
Sep 7, 2010 at 12:31 PM UTC
oily ****
17 | 31 Poems for August 2017 Let me whisper those sweet words that held together the shattering glass you think you’ve become. I know that through their utterance you will finally feel your heart beating to the rhythm of our love. I want our long late-night conversations and phone calls to come to life again. Because I miss hearing your voice on Wednesday afternoons and the joy in your sporadic bursts of laughter. Sometimes you feel as if you’re running away from the constant pang of unworthiness that your heartbeat has become. The world has made you feel like an abandoned church, but in my eyes, you’ll always be a cathedral. I just wish you’d stop running away from the fear of finding something so genuine and just run into my arms. I want the chance to breathe love down your spine; I want to be with you until the love runs out. In a world ravaged by cold wars, our love and happiness is what we should be constantly fighting for. Life will bend and stretch the both of us into painful shapes, but I know that we will eventually be okay. During cold winter nights and warm summer mornings, I long to have the presence of your body next to me. I know that we didn’t come this far, to only come this far.
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Aug 17, 2017
Aug 17, 2017 at 1:02 PM UTC
August Reminiscing
All my life I have kneeled down at your altar Sacrificing my innocence and self worth A lamb who's blood would gain me favor "the Father, from whom are all things and for whom we exist" Yes, I worshipped you like a God I was afraid of Old Testament wrath brewed in our home And I readied myself to **** what I loved As Abraham would, as sheep do for their shepherds For I knew my creator loved me, and called me love "For he disciplines those he loves, and he punishes each one he accepts as his child. " By the stripes inflicted upon me I would be freed Of this shame and unworthiness you bestowed But it turns out "Father" does not mean "God" Sometimes it just means "alcoholic" Sometimes discipline just means abuse My faith is now placed in me, and the God that made us both.
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Jan 27, 2019
Jan 27, 2019 at 11:20 PM UTC
Born Again
My heart can not lie and say your are the one. But I can not seem to remember how I got to loving you. So can we please start over ? Can you romance me all over again so I can feel the moment I fell in love with you ? Can you write me poems again so I remember the feeling of losing my breath at the emotions they brought ? Will you whisper those sweet words that held together the shattering glass I had become and through their utterance I could feel your heart ? Can those long late night conversations and phone calls come to life again ? Cause I miss the smile I held while falling asleep and the sense of hope and love you brought to my world of loneliness. Don't misintepret me when I say it all seems to be a distant memory. What I feel is real but A point came in my life where detachment became a way to cope. Even in loving you I was not really there. Perhaps I was running away from the constant pang of unworthiness that my heart beat had become ? The skeletons which kept me up at night ? Or just the mere fear of finding something so real because I tends to "exude the illusions of perfect, yet I fail to commit. I seem to ruin anything good going for me". But give me a chance. Can we start over cause my heart says you're the one.
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Mar 22, 2016
Mar 22, 2016 at 5:20 AM UTC
Start Over Perhaps ?
How do I mend my relationship with my body? How do I hate myself, less? How could I? How dare I? The world doesn't. It tells me all the reasons why I shouldn't.                                                                            I mustn't. I must hate myself. I must hate my body, that is what I deserve. What my body deserves Love is reserved for the thin.                                 the beautiful. The beautiful. I could never be beautiful. It's a lie, when they say it. It's a lie. when they say I am. I am beautiful from the neck up. but you'd never use that word,                             designate it to my body.                                                              to the rest of me. The rest of me should be tossed away.                                               discarded. Please sir, can I keep my head? It's the only place I live, the only place I am allowed to be. I am not allowed to be beautiful. not allowed to be thin. that was not the hand I was dealt. not my lot in life. I exist in the world with my shame exposed.                                                               On display. Do you know how that feels? No hiding. No escaping. No pretending. I am fat.   My body is fat. and from first glance, you can see my unworthiness.                                                         My lack of deservedness It's always there.
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Sep 23, 2020
Sep 23, 2020 at 10:53 AM UTC
My Body, Continued
How do I mend my relationship with my body? How do I hate myself, less? How could I? How dare I? The world doesn't. It tells me all the reasons why I shouldn't.                                                                            I mustn't. I must hate myself. I must hate my body, that is what I deserve. What my body deserves Love is reserved for the thin.                                 the beautiful. The beautiful. I could never be beautiful. It's a lie, when they say it. It's a lie. when they say I am. I am beautiful from the neck up. but you'd never use that word,                             designate it to my body.                                                              to the rest of me. The rest of me should be tossed away.                                               discarded. Please sir, can I keep my head? It's the only place I live, the only place I am allowed to be. I am not allowed to be beautiful. not allowed to be thin. that was not the hand I was dealt. not my lot in life. I exist in the world with my shame exposed.                                                               On display. Do you know how that feels? No hiding. No escaping. No pretending. I am fat.   My body is fat. and from first glance, you can see my unworthiness.                                                         My lack of deservedness It's always there.
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circumstances changes the man-you-al neglects you, negligence a criminal offense against a young woman’s every essenced senses, neglect is regret coming the unthinkable that I guess is the “not me joke” neon sign winking and buzzing endless by doctors orders(!): stop being a macho idiot, get thee to a nail salon, redo updo thyself from toes to fingertips in a remarkable stunner of a pink, that says to those glaring untruths of unworthiness I am beautiful and I will be loved if you only think pink
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Oct 19, 2024
Oct 19, 2024 at 8:35 AM UTC
Think Pink Nail Salon
Despite my unworthiness. Despite my waywardness. Despite my wretchedness. You choose to love me. Despite how many times I grieve You. Doubt you. Turn to idols, putting them over You. You choose to pursue me. Despite my brokenness. My blindness. My weakness. You choose to embrace me. Your love is beyond any Love I have ever known. For it has no end. It has no limits. Your Love is compassionate. Merciful. Fierce. Tender. It draws me. It woos me. To stay close to Thee. To stay. Safe in Your arms. To be the wounded sheep. Held in the healing embrace of her Shepherd. To be healed. By His Love. Thank You, Lord. that despite all that I am. Despite all that I've done. You choose. To love me.
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Apr 16, 2017
Apr 16, 2017 at 8:06 PM UTC
You Choose To Love Me
“Just comply with a smile,” he says. It’s as if he owns you. To comply means “to act in accordance with a command.” Commands are what you give to a dog. That isn’t what you are—for one second, don’t believe that that’s what you are, my friend, But what he implies is that you are. Comply. Submit. Lie down. Don’t move. Shut your eyes. Stop breathing. “But smile while you die,” he says. And you say “yes” because you love him, But love is not mean to take life, It’s meant to give. Say no. SAY NO. And make him believe it when you say it. Breathe again, Open your eyes, Move, Stand, Shout REFUSE. And make him believe it when you say it. He needs you. He needs you and he hates it about himself. He needs you and you are woman and woman is the opposite of masculine so He hates you. Or at least he acts like he hates you, but really He loves you. And maybe he feels unworthy of your love, sweet, unconditional love, so he pushes, fights, quarrels, hits It all out of you. Reflects his unworthiness on you. Doesn’t want to melt, to sink, to unravel, to be loved To be taken into your arms and held and told, “it’s okay to be weak.” so he tells You, “just comply with a smile.” he tells You to be weak so that he is strong, or at least he thinks that he is. really his strength is a projection of the anger that he is human, mortal, weary, going to fade, and he’s angry that he’s not the hero of some fictional story— FICTIONAL story— where the man who destroys life is the one who lives forever. what the world needs is not heroes and their damsels in distress. what the world just needs is Humans. You are a Human, my friend, Of the softest and sweetest variety. And humans deserve to feel loved but it is not Your responsibility to Love him. He will go out looking for love when he realizes he’s worthy of it, When he stops hating himself so much that he Kills others. And you cannot wait for that to happen. Smile, my friend, but smile because You want to, Not because he wants You to comply like the kicked down & scared little dog that he feels like. He wants You to feel trapped because he is trapped, But You are not. Your capability to love, and love endlessly, is what makes You free. Smile, my friend, and say no. Breathe again, Open your eyes, Stand, Shout, Live, And be free. Please, be free.
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Sep 30, 2013
Sep 30, 2013 at 10:13 PM UTC
For Women,
“Just comply with a smile,” he says. It’s as if he owns you. To comply means “to act in accordance with a command.” Commands are what you give to a dog. That isn’t what you are—for one second, don’t believe that that’s what you are, my friend, But what he implies is that you are. Comply. Submit. Lie down. Don’t move. Shut your eyes. Stop breathing. “But smile while you die,” he says. And you say “yes” because you love him, But love is not mean to take life, It’s meant to give. Say no. SAY NO. And make him believe it when you say it. Breathe again, Open your eyes, Move, Stand, Shout REFUSE. And make him believe it when you say it. He needs you. He needs you and he hates it about himself. He needs you and you are woman and woman is the opposite of masculine so He hates you. Or at least he acts like he hates you, but really He loves you. And maybe he feels unworthy of your love, sweet, unconditional love, so he pushes, fights, quarrels, hits It all out of you. Reflects his unworthiness on you. Doesn’t want to melt, to sink, to unravel, to be loved To be taken into your arms and held and told, “it’s okay to be weak.” so he tells You, “just comply with a smile.” he tells You to be weak so that he is strong, or at least he thinks that he is. really his strength is a projection of the anger that he is human, mortal, weary, going to fade, and he’s angry that he’s not the hero of some fictional story— FICTIONAL story— where the man who destroys life is the one who lives forever. what the world needs is not heroes and their damsels in distress. what the world just needs is Humans. You are a Human, my friend, Of the softest and sweetest variety. And humans deserve to feel loved but it is not Your responsibility to Love him. He will go out looking for love when he realizes he’s worthy of it, When he stops hating himself so much that he Kills others. And you cannot wait for that to happen. Smile, my friend, but smile because You want to, Not because he wants You to comply like the kicked down & scared little dog that he feels like. He wants You to feel trapped because he is trapped, But You are not. Your capability to love, and love endlessly, is what makes You free. Smile, my friend, and say no. Breathe again, Open your eyes, Stand, Shout, Live, And be free. Please, be free.
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It never saw itself as much,              a rough coat...   but underneath that where              its true potential lay. But when It looked deeper           all it saw was conflicting layers.     Then the unthinkable, others saw his uses but he just cut into himself. Tears feel as the feeling of unworthiness              was cut away as layers fell.. but this was like every other                      onion depressed at its worth. but everything is special in another's eyes,      Were all like a onion, layers of dignity. But even though we don't see it,       We all have a worth, were layers of an onion..
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Dec 30, 2017
Dec 30, 2017 at 9:26 AM UTC
The Depressed Onion
All your smiles and sweet words, Feel a bit like an ice pick In my aching chest. But I get it your scared, And I’m not the best you could ever do, I hope that’s true. Just know knowing you is an echo Of my past and empty promises that couldn't last. You chose wrong, I’m not on any throne And you've always known I stand on no pedestal, We didn't have to be alone. But I was worth more, than to feel That I constantly pester you. I don’t know whether I’m disappointed in Myself , Or proud that I was so brave, Even if you walked away And let me drown in that moat of unworthiness While you mutter repetitively in your untouchable tower That “she isn't worth the risk”. Go ahead and merge with the shadows, I’ll think of everything and hate that I miss, Every bit of the things that cease to exist. You won't even let aPrincess in After ascending those walls in the face of great rains, and murmuring bandaids over old scars and fresh pains. You coward.
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Feb 13, 2013
Feb 13, 2013 at 9:42 PM UTC
Coward
For I am a fool Blemished By comparing distinctive venues My judgment As exquisite and so untrue To whom I once trust The people Of unworthiness Imprison thee From a wedding between A suitor and a darling cousin But blindness cajole me With a different appeal Tantalizing every move Caught in a snare of entrapment The family, I once honored But shamed Beneath me As the stones began crumbling Sounding To a level of crush bones
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Dec 11, 2009
Dec 11, 2009 at 6:29 AM UTC
Judgment Like No Other
I cup your ears in my hands then I kiss your forehead, your eyes, tip of your nose, your cheekbones and finally your lips systematically removing your doubt & fear of my love for you. Ten fingers embrace your shoulders; trace your spine undressing the unworthiness while kissing entire center of your being sealing just how much you mean to me ; yet your eyes tell me a different story every time possessing a thieves glare as if you've taking mischievously what was giving So I lifted & uncleave from you yet before leaving I held your hands turning them palm side up I kissed your palms unlocking the shackles of guilt that you thought no one noticed giving you freedom to live freedom to be .
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Feb 27, 2014
Feb 27, 2014 at 6:58 PM UTC
Freedom's Affection
He was born from the darkness of man's sin- a monster, a vengeful spirit, and a barter of death A whisper of an end resides in his breath; and swallows   up all in it's deathly grey cigarette stench You'll find him at the edge, you'll hear him creeping in every corners crack He will follow by day as a shadow of every lonely previous night He'll shine on all your fears before you sleep; he'll chase you in your dreams—cutting the images of all your imaginations, a constant knife in your spine A blade of grass, he'll valley around your heart and water it's weeds He'll brittle your skin, belittle you in insecurities, and beneath his towel of hand- he'll wrap his darkness around your neck You'll wish upon a star, as he's the darkness surrounding You'll pray to a god, he'll prey on your doubts like a pouncing predator. His fingers are a remote to channel your anxiety- a device of your depression Placing unworthiness in your hand, as a weapon of your own self harm. He'll cut you from hopes, and pierce a dagger of misery into your soul You'll run, run into his arms that he lied a trap for you An uncomfortable long hug, he'll ***** you until you feel too ashamed to scream for help He'll promise you heaven, but give you a whole lot of hell first he'll give you his curse, he'll curse your very worth, and leave you bare and unholy—his unworthy curse He'll disguise his red hand with a bouquet of black roses, but beware his thorns, beware his thorns He'll treat you fairly in the abuse he gives us all. He'll attack you singlehandedly, but he has a hand in us all His goal is to raise an army of his slaved cowards, be weary- _fear wears red, in the devil's flowers_
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Jan 12, 2023
Jan 12, 2023 at 12:40 PM UTC
Fear wears red, in the devil's flowers
He was born from the darkness of man's sin- a monster, a vengeful spirit, and a barter of death A whisper of an end resides in his breath; and swallows   up all in it's deathly grey cigarette stench You'll find him at the edge, you'll hear him creeping in every corners crack He will follow by day as a shadow of every lonely previous night He'll shine on all your fears before you sleep; he'll chase you in your dreams—cutting the images of all your imaginations, a constant knife in your spine A blade of grass, he'll valley around your heart and water it's weeds He'll brittle your skin, belittle you in insecurities, and beneath his towel of hand- he'll wrap his darkness around your neck You'll wish upon a star, as he's the darkness surrounding You'll pray to a god, he'll prey on your doubts like a pouncing predator. His fingers are a remote to channel your anxiety- a device of your depression Placing unworthiness in your hand, as a weapon of your own self harm. He'll cut you from hopes, and pierce a dagger of misery into your soul You'll run, run into his arms that he lied a trap for you An uncomfortable long hug, he'll ***** you until you feel too ashamed to scream for help He'll promise you heaven, but give you a whole lot of hell first he'll give you his curse, he'll curse your very worth, and leave you bare and unholy—his unworthy curse He'll disguise his red hand with a bouquet of black roses, but beware his thorns, beware his thorns He'll treat you fairly in the abuse he gives us all. He'll attack you singlehandedly, but he has a hand in us all His goal is to raise an army of his slaved cowards, be weary- _fear wears red, in the devil's flowers_
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Gross exertion, infatuation     Flagellating the root Of embellished insecurity     Begging for a meal of ashes Early morning pain, infatuation     A ****** companion's invective Reminder of our unworthiness     As we consort with teardrops Inquisitor's interview, infatuation     Smiling torture chamber Turning idly in hand the implements     That will extract the truth of our ugliness Gravedigger's labor, infatuation     Burying our faces in clenching fists Knowing our hearts have finally done it     And sold us out for a smile
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Dec 27, 2014
Dec 27, 2014 at 7:33 PM UTC
Crush Sufferer
Lilies mean I dare you to love me, Yet no one ever dared before. She wore unworthiness like armour, Too afraid to ask for more. But then their souls collided softly, A feeling whispered, old yet new. As if their atoms once had danced, As if her heart already knew. Stargazers were her favourite flowers, Pink petals stretching toward the sky. She never thought she’d be deserving, Yet he brought them—without a why. He told her love was hard to give, That words don’t spill from heart to tongue. But every act, each quiet moment, Spoke of love he left unsung. The day he gave her stargazers, She learned that she could bloom as well. That love was not a war to fight, But something safe where she could dwell. Still, they have never said the words, Three small ones locked behind their lips. But love is felt in all the ways That words may falter, break, or slip. And if they never pass through her, Then may they come from him instead. For she could never bear to hear “I love you” from another’s breath.
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Mar 15, 2025
Mar 15, 2025 at 12:47 PM UTC
stargazer lilies
Echoes of rejection skip the beats of my heart Negative thoughts attach to my reasoning like swarms of unrelenting gnats as I drown in the swell of unworthiness I am blinded by severe self judgement Covered in the monotony of shame I cower on feeble hands and skinned knees trapped in my own prison of nauseating filth I succumb to the assumptions of your silence weighed down by bricks of uncertainty My breathing ever so shallow as I choke on the asphyxiation of despair Longing for the communion of acceptance but unwilling to beg for your approval I suffer in the abyss of formless chaos Projecting desperation onto a mirror with no reflection
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Oct 24, 2018
Oct 24, 2018 at 3:53 PM UTC
formless chaos
Savor the sweetness of bad poetry, the crooked and cockeyed words, the lame and bumpy thoughts of oblivion Skip out the jumbled rhythm, and just roll with it The road is not smooth, the jargon misplaced Swift the **** pace by its carcass, caress your stiff neck, your strained eyes the pen killed the message, the hands tremble in its confusion It isn’t good, it isn’t sensual or soothing It clumps in your throat, making disgust, flopping out of par swing and miss, capture the drive, the stamina to make it through Make the trudge, delve in the derelict Can you make out the message, the theme? or is it so bad you want to scream, or just cry from the injustice of bad lines Do not line your thoughts in the flow, the swift, but let your soul sing the confusion of its blunted voice, let it bask in its commonality of bad taste Do not pen out, but pen in Do not bleep out, but bleat out Scream your unworthiness, your crooked smiles, your cockeyed convulsions Give us your bad poetry, God knows I have.
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Jan 25, 2012
Jan 25, 2012 at 4:42 AM UTC
Give us
Aberrant bloom, you doggedly ungrow- once scarlet, now a pale and formless bud (much tidier to nip when drained of blood) writhes grimly down into the earth below. O! fruitless vine, you hide yourself away, ashamed to drink the stars' sufficient light- and so, though worthy in another’s sight, unworthiness begets a sick decay.
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Feb 18, 2016
Feb 18, 2016 at 6:45 PM UTC
Disgraced (or merely ignorant of grace):