Is this what love was meant to be?
This overwhelming feeling in your company
Undeniably true, unfathomably right
Becoming my everything in the blink of an eye

How is every touch so perfectly placed
Mindful and distinct
Yet absent-mindedly performed
Like second nature

Every word written or uttered from your lips
Fills my heart to burst
You've been fulfilling my young girl fantasies
Those of which I never thought could be brought into this reality

When you ask me, "where did you come from?"
While staring into my eyes, bewildered
Or breathlessly gasp, "what the ****?"
During and after every passionate night

Every time I'd blow your mind
Knowledge of some obscure childhood memory you hold dear
I was there to share it
Though I was nowhere near

Our beginning started on a shattered base
Each of us unaware that the other
Was precisely meant to be in this place
Convoluted events leading us here
At the same time
For our beginning

It's been 4 years in the making, you and I
And even longer than that still
A perfect set of circumstances
That it took to reveal

You're what I've been wanting
You're what I've been seeking
I'm what you've been yearning for
I'm what you've been needing
May we continue to grow this happiness
Grow this family
Meld these lives
Expand our spirits

I cannot explain why I feel this way
But I promise to love you every day

My lungs grow weaker with each stifled breath, my heart with each offset beat. My feet no longer  hold on to this little piece of rock we call Earth. Mother is summoning me back to her. I will test her patience before I yield to the overwhelming call...

like Mother nature, herself
i am unpredictable and beautiful
but also Ugly and stagnant
i am chaotic and destructive
magnificent and Tenacious
growing and learning
like mother Nature
i can be destroyed
only to come back Stronger
full of raging love
and Arcane fury

How do you even like me? What do you even like about me that makes you keep saying you love me everyday?

How do you keep those thoughts at the forefront of your mind as you watch my daily failures?

How do I also attain this level of love for you?

While everyone is busied chasing the light
I take my strolls in darkness
Yes, I wish I was like you...
I wish I was that positive light shining
Attracting those around me like moths to the flame
A shining beacon of hope and love

But I will forever be a shadow...
Delight myself in the dead and dying
The sick and twisted and hurt and broken
I contain just enough light to lead them
A flickering candle to follow
Until you see the light at the end of the tunnel
The opening to this dark cavern
The silver lining past these dark stormy clouds

Follow that light, but I remain here
Knowing my place and my purpose
I am in limbo between the dark and the light
I am like the ferryman, the gatekeeper
I am the shadow that can sometimes be
Barely perceptible, or darker than nightmarish dreams...

The feeling of a hot cup o' joe
In my cold winter's hands
Doesn't matter the flavor
Be it magic, be it sand
I'm a slave to its warmth
Though it stains my teeth
Couldn't imagine a morning without
That hot cup o' joe and me

I just want to be noticed
For the talents that I hide
I want to be remembered for my light
But it'll most likely be my lies
Negativity becomes sticky in the mind
A tar that won't wash away
Like the bitter taste of a rind
Hatred grows inside and poisons
Each thought that should arise
Gratitude is lacking this day
Only resentment is seen in their eyes
Forget the rules and the happiness
That's been the goal of my life
There is no fairness in this struggle
I carry alone, my brittle bones and strife

I've often thought I was out looking for perfection
Neat and clean. Interesting. Clear sense of direction.
But the course of these last four years have opened up my eyes
There's no such thing. Still no ring. Happy breathless sighs.
Wisdom and grace have cleared the fog and though love blooms in spring
Words will sting. Hearts will scream. And TRUE love is a messy thing...

it is inside of us all
this feeling, this intuition
weaved through the strands
stitched in every chromosome
this knowingness, this superstition
it is given no more than a glance
as fleeting as deja vu
it is inside of us all
inside me
inside you
believe it
to be
true