These sands of time
slowly slip through my mind,
Grains that slow and fade,
unable to be defined

Are we really living life,
or are we just living to breathe?
To count the days as they fade away,
softly in the summer breeze?

I want to believe there's more
To life then the eye can see
but my time is ticking away
and soon I won't be me

I'm fading away
slowly
I'm losing time.

I'm fading away
slowly
as I lose myself in rhyme.

These grains of time
have slipped away
up into the breeze.

You won't see me again
I've slipped away
out into the sea.

So tell me now,
now that my time is done
do you miss me at all?

Or are you still lost
within the worlds of time
running towards your own downfall?

If you're a pencil,
then I'm the paper,
We're perfect together,
but not forever.

Lean on me,
tell me your deepest lies.
Show me your true self,
what's under that disguise.

Spill your secrets,
Color me grey
Tear off my edges,
Mean what you want to say.

Fill me up
With your darkest thoughts.
Leave me stranded,
Alone in your room.
Let me down
With your fancy words,
And leave me to my doom.

I'll shrivel up over the ages.
With your secrets locked inside.
But you'll forget me and move on,
For the world I have died.

Because I existed
only for you
for your smiles
and the pictures you drew.
But I guess I was stupid
you never even knew
how much
I truly...
Loved You...

My pencil scribbles
on this empty sheet
defining the story of my life.
Incoherent lines for
incoherent thoughts,
unable to describe this strife.

These useless words dance
on the empty edges of lined pain.
These ruthless monsters rejoice
on  the empty corners of my brain.

My mind is a battlefield
of meaningless words
and demons of the past.
The only hero left
is a sole broken soul
that'll never even last.

But one look at you
and the lost soul is no more.
Something new flickers,
there's some hope for the war.

But the flicker of hope vanishes
as the last straying colors fade grey.
The hero knows it is a zero,
and doesn't want you to stay.

Because I'd let hope in to help,
but it's too late to try.
I have to fight this battle myself
Can't let you in to drown and die.

I'm bad news and a lost cause
all rolled into one
I may smile but I'm shattered,
incurable when the day is done.

Colorless...
Loveless...
Useless...
Like these words I pour out.

Emotionless...
Heartless...
Hopeless...
Chained up by demons, too broken to shout

Another year
has Come and passed
Who knew
this long I would last.

My body is working
But I can't move
My heart is paralyzed
At the sight of you.

And my lips are moving
but words can't escape
Your name stuck in time,
as I stand here agape...

In the back of my mind,
thoughts swirling inside
memories crashing and burning ,
drowning in the deep tide.

The reality you convinced me was true
turned out to be nothing more
than a figment of my mind.

The truth you convinced me was reality
turned out to be nothing more
than a lost paradise I designed.

And a single tear
drops
from my face

And my heartbeat
stops
empty in space

As my realities crash
and tear into pieces
My life crashes
and cries into shreds...
Because you were all left of me
And now that too is dead.

Well I guess we all have
our own versions of the truth
Our own little realities
Mine separate from you

When I say that I'm alright
And you know that's not true
When my smile, its so fake
And I can't hide it from you

So maybe I'm living in an illusion,
Or maybe this is all just a dream.
I don't want you to see my life
how it really is.
You mean too much to me

You barely scratched the surface
of my whole life story
And to tell the truth
I don't want you to know,
Just think that my life's boring

It's better for you
and better for me
If you keep living in this illusion
Because we only see what we want to see
And you don't need to see these scars...
They hide too much of the truth
The truth I myself hide from.

And I hope you'll never have to find
The ugly truth that I call my life
I'll keep it all buried in time
In this pain, in this strife.

I'm trying to hold on
To this little sliver of a lie
that holds the broken pieces of my reality,
Telling myself I'll be alright...
That this pain is just an illusion
And in truth I'll be fine.

But I was never good at lying
And I'm just doing this for you.

Because you're
safe
in your own little
reality
As long as its
Far
from my own little
truth.

Who knew it was possible
to feel so many things at once
as I looked at you smiling
After so many months

I'm glad you found a way
to wipe those tears from your face
I wanted to make you smile
but that's not the case.

I miss you
but you're happy now
Forgive me for breaking
your heart in two.
But we weren't meant to be
That, at least, is true.

We should've lasted forever
Who knew forever was so short.
And you may blame me for the end of us
But let me tell you
You're still my everything
However much I wish that wasn't true.
And after all those memories we made.
It's hard to forget you.

But though I wish to
hold on
to you.
I just had to let you go...

December has come
And time has passed
Who knew without you
This long I'd last

It's weird to think
You won't be here
For Christmas was our
favorite time of the year

Gingerbread houses
and the Christmas trees
Snowball fights
and the cold, cold breeze...

And you won't be here
to save me from the cold
or to wrap me up tight
at night as we grow old

And you won't be here
to chase me around the room
To steal my chocolate cookies
or to escape on a broom

All the nonsense we did
all the jokes we had
are frozen in place
in the Christmas past

And as I set up this tree
and light it up too
I sit here wondering
what do I do

I always love the Holidays,
but I'm thinking of you.
Of all the smiles we shared
and the songs we knew.

And you should know,
I asked Santa for a gift
But I know I won't get it,
I know, I admit.

I even sent a letter
My wish, I couldn't buy,
I wished and I wished
I still had to try...

Because if there's one thing that I knew,
It's that Christmas
Wouldn't be Christmas
Without You

Well,
If I thought you could fix me
I guess I was wrong
Cause all we could
is try to heal ourselves in song

I guess,
We're both broken,
But if you're a wreck,
I'm a catastrophe and
drowning in my own mess

Because,
Now we're apart
and all that is left
Are these unfinished words
and promises never kept.

Tonight,
I'm drowning in my own tears
and memories of you
in a room of broken music notes
and broken hearts too.

And,
I want to run back to you
but I know that will be wrong.
I guess we were never meant to be
anything more than an unfinished song...

Is it a sin
To be so broken apart...
To be so torn at the edges
That there's nothing left but heart?

I'm still beating
Though I feel like I have no soul.
This life I'm barely breathing,
And maybe I've lost control.

Skin torn off by shards of broken promises
Bones withered down by time,
Yet the only thing I have left is this heart
This heart I pour out in rhyme.

Maybe I've lost control
And all sense of direction
I have but nothing left,
Not even an ounce of protection.

These words I spill out,
Written in the blood of my empty heart,
They're the only thing I have left,
Every other piece of me is torn apart.

So I'm begging you,
With this one last thing I have to say,
Take care of these words, my heart,
It's already broken anyway.

The faster I run
The faster these monsters keep
Catching up to me

And it feels like I'm
The only one reliving
My own tragedy

These old poems...
Turn to new songs
As I dream sitting awake
All night long

And the days...
They will go by
As I regret demons past
And saying goodbye

But at least when I'm awake...
At 2 AM and thinking of you
I'll have these songs with me
And something to sing to.

A little girl asked me today,
With her eyes full of hope,
and her face like a dove.

She asked, "Please, I need to ask...
What is the meaning of Love?"

I told her to ask me anything else,
anything but that.

I looked her in the eyes, so innocent and kind.
I could not tell her if I wanted to
She was still yet too young,
with yet too much to go through

Love's for dreamers,
for it really doesn't exist
but in fairy tales and storybooks
and these stupid fat myths.

The true meaning of love?
If you listen I'll say,
But for you romantics out there,
I beg you not to stay.

Love is nothing but an illusion
It messes with your heart
and messes up your brain.
It's nothing but sleepless nights
and causes nothing but endless pain.

It's an ever-growing fire
that's meant to be admired
and cause odd desires
in empty souls just trying to belong
in this empty world of liars.

It consumes you
and spits you out,
till nothing's truly left,
but the ashes of a broken soul
and promises never meant to be kept.

People come,
and Lovers go.
Follow your passion
and strive for your goal.

Tomorrow is real,
and time will come.
But love is reserved
for the naive ones.

Love is for the lonely
or the ones who haven't found themselves.
Not for you, you pretty one
take the world for yourself.

You cannot fall in love,
What falls, breaks.
And you cannot grow in it either,
for the seeds are fakes.

Don't let love misguide you,
for its nothing but a shadow.
It'll linger and fade,
because people themselves outgrow.

I tell you this as a warning.
Steel up your heart, and let it grow cold.
For if you cannot love, you cannot get heart-broken.
At least... That's what I'm told...