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Rebel Heart Jun 2018
It's unfair
How when people leave
Everything that reminds you of them
Tends to stay
It's unfair
How I can't just move on
Without dying a little everyday
It's unfair
...
~It's unfair how much I miss you and
it's unfair how much I really shouldn't
.
(Haven't posted in a long time and probably won't be posting for a time after this week is over so here's the beginning of a 6 page long rant of the most hypocritically written piece of RH's that I've ever read.. Happy Writing ~BM)

(Front Page 6/5/2018)
Rebel Heart May 2018
...
Because in between the notes
That hum a melody through my veins
I find the overbearing reality
Of the ghosts that scream out
In a rising soprano
So out-of-tune that I'm afraid
The pieces left of my heart
Will shatter into nothingness
And leave me empty
With no music to describe
The burden of these demons I carry
...
Most of all,
I'm afraid
To live in this void
Of infinite silence
That forever threatens
To swallow me whole
(Front Page 5/8/2018)
Rebel Heart May 2018
...
But in the deafening sounds of silence
There lay thousands of silent screams
Never to be heard by anyone
But the ghosts that haunted
The sinners and the ******
...
If only you could hear
The echoing of their voices
In the corners of my mind
In the emptiness of the night
Then and only then
Would you understand
That behind my smiles
And ****** childish jokes
Lies a thousand unheard screams
Demanding me
To let them break out
And finally be free
...
Because I am the Tortured and the ******.
(Front Page 5/6/2018)
Rebel Heart May 2018
...
But the second I chose
To embrace who I was
I plunged into a darkness
So thick
I lost my own reflection
...
and When I finally emerged
I saw a once-broken girl
Turn into the very demons
That tormented her
...
And she then turned
Into the very monsters
That made her suffer
In the land of supposed dreams
...
And that little girl
Was wiped from existence
Just. Like. That.
Never to be found
Ever again
(Front Page 5/5/2018)
Rebel Heart Apr 2018
...
And Yet
I will not seek the forgiveness
I know I don't deserve
And
I will not seek the redemption
My demons wouldn't allow
...
And I will live on
With the heartbreaking truth
Of how someone
With a heart as pure as you
Could never be near
A monster like me.
(Front Page 5/2/2018)
Rebel Heart Apr 2018
Is it wrong
To wish
That for all the scars I own,
I could reopen just one
To let my demons spill out
So as to cleanse myself
Of the torturing sins
I carry as a weight
Within my veins...
But Alas
That would do nothing
But let more darkness in
...
(Front Page 4/29/2018)
Rebel Heart Apr 2018
...
And that was when
I finally realized
My demons made home
In the valleys of where
My wounds ran so deep
They became scars
Full of ghosts and regret
Echoing nothing but
The deafening screams
Of silence once lost
(I'm going to post up pieces of this particular poetry collection in the next few days that RebelHeart never got to publishing from years ago. I just miss her a little extra and I've always regretted not being able to see her hurting in the years past. Now that I do know she's hurting, I can't help her. Funny how life works. ~BM)

(Front Page 4/26/2018)
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