Lonesomeness is in the beautiful sounds of birds in flight,

Lonesomeness is in the way the blue of your favourite sweater ages by welcoming a solemn grey presence,

Lonesomeness is in the monstrous whiff of a corpse,

it is the most powerful when woven into memories of a loved one, forever gone.

Midnight lonesomeness, hath becometh mine best friend
Midnight lonesomeness, verily I telleth thee shalt be mine end....


©Brandon nagley
©Lonesome poet's poetry

Now mind is clear
as a cloudless sky.
Time then to make a
home in wilderness.

What have I done but
wander with my eyes
in the trees? So I
will build:  wife,
family, and seek
for neighbors.

                     Or I
perish of lonesomeness
or want of food or
lightning or the bear
(must tame the hart
and wear the bear).

And maybe make an image
of my wandering, a little
image—shrine by the
roadside to signify
to traveler that I live
here in the wilderness
awake and at home.

If I feel tomorrow like I feel today,
I'll try again Anyway
What's to be but what's to lose,
There's too much haze, too much snooze,
I sleep it off,
This heavy cloud,
The break of dawn. I win.
Another day another light,
Another date another sin.
If I can feel tomorrow this sad abyss
I might just die of lonesomeness...

Hello any of Eddie's friends on HP or even you Christians who don't know Eddie from eddiestarrpoetry most know him and his wonderful writings on Jesus Christ ..  Eddie has been a friend to all of us, as he's been trying to show you the real way to live, life and love and forgiveness. And show you there is eternal life in Jesus Christ alone!!! A loving merciful Savior... Eddie wanted me to tell everyone why he hasn't been on HP lately. Reason is he got into some type of accident long ago don't know how it happened just know it messed up his brain, causing brain damage.   So he's been healed of having his life restored to him praise God!!! Though he still has been getting horrible head pains and it's making him sick and in pain... He's always praying for me and you and those he hasn't met on here to know yehsua ha'mashiach- ( meaning Jesus the Messiah) in Hebrew tongue... Jesus Christ!!! Eddie is truly a man of God and a loving forgiving man... Whether you respect him or dont respect him. Put that away for now and pray for his head is all I ask you that God may heal his headpains sorrows. Lonesomeness and that God made show Eddie gods will for edds life..   I hope others will pray for him and continue to pray for this man. Because he prays for all of you even ones he don't know he prays you come to know the one and only Savior a loving Jesus and forgiving Lord and king of kings... And God's only son who died for me and you... So this is why Eddie's not been on HP lots... Please pray for him if this message touches your heart and you want God to heal Eddie...for all things are for the good to those that love god...and God will do stuff in his time not ours... Humans always want things our way. We seem to forget were suppose to live for God's will and choices not our selfish wills. Hope and pray others may pray for eddiestarr. Thank you and by ending with that wanna write poetic prayer for Eddie not really poem. Lol just quick prayer for you Eddie!!!

Dear God, heavenly father ... I come to you today to ask for your healing and mercy upon my brother Eddie , God I ask you may touch Eddie's head... That you may heal whatever's happening with the pains in his brain and head .. I pray dear God you can heal Eddie from his toes to the top of his head. I pray Lord God for your anointing over Eddie. That your angels may be upon him, as well as your holy spirit may be sent to him in his times or lonesomeness, sorrow, pain physical mental emotional spiritual. God please give Eddie peace in all aspects of his life and I come to you today God. To heal Eddie fully that his life may be abundant and as once was... And God please show Eddie his purpose here on this earth before you take him LORD... Show Eddie you are in control and there's no reason to fear even in sickness. For you are the great healing physician dear God.  I beg ask and pray for your loving kindness over Eddie and mercy and grace. And your healing will come whether in Eddie's time or in your own. For me and Eddie know all things work together for good to those that love you dear God. Please guide Eddie in his hard times right now and sickness. I ask and pray and thank you Lord for hearing my prayer ...

In Jesus name I pray
Amen!!!

Dear Jane Sardua Nagley;

Hello dear queen, I just wanted to write you a love letter just in case anything is to happen to me. I'm trying not to sound nor be a pessimistic being mine love, though with all the health issues I have going on right now and worries on mine mind,it's truly hard to be positive. When daily ( literal demon's attack me) as they do you mentally and emotionally and me physically spiritually and in all form's, ( as who cares if others believe in that or not!!!) As tis you have seen the proof physically and what happened with us the one time face talking on Skype. The breathing coming through the line. Yeah as you and I more than know!!! Anyways what I'm writing to say is though things haven't been most positive for me health wise and things im dealing with as you are dealing with alot; The true positivity that I do have is you Jane. YOU!!!! Yeah I said it queen. YOU ( mine soulmate), YOU ( mine life) YOU ( mine all) YOU ( Mine love) YOU ( mine air) YOU Earl Jane Sardua ( Nagley)!!!!!!! See you always say to me that you don't do enough for me, that you say you aren't good enough for me, that I deserve better is what you tell me.... And that you are worthless you say at times...... !!!!!! Jane nagley!!!! LISTEN TO ME OK? Loll... You ARE MORE THAN WORTHY OK? MORE THAN!!!!! You are PERFECT!!!!! MORE THAN!!!! You are ****!!!! MORE THAN!!!! You are the positivity that surrounds me!! You are gods light and his messenger to me!!! I don't even deserve someone so spotless and beautiful and pure and angelic and amazing!!!! And someone so godly beautiful inside and out Jane!!!! Your inside is more than wonderful and attractive!!! And glowing!!!! Why do you think all people circle around you Jane? *** there's a bonfire!? Lol NO!!!! Because you are bright and a light and everyone from here to heaven can see that!!!! People adore you!!! God cherishes you!!!! I want,need, yearn, and desire only YOUUUUUU!!!! Not thy friend's, not noone here not noone anywhere!!! There's one queen who owns me and who I'm with and need and want hear me yet! Listening? Lol the Queens name is earl Jane nagley!!!! it's YOU!!!! Noone else YOU I'm in mad love with!!! and I don't care who doesn't like us.. And I don't care who sees our love!!! Because our love is something others wished they'd have yet do not!! Yet I pray others can find a love like our's!!! Because I've never been so happy in mine life!!! I've never known love before, fact is as I told you!!! Before you I reached out for any quote ( love and affection I can get) ànd I was never truly loved!!! I never truly felt love from anyone nor did I actually ever love anyone else!!! It was out of lonesomeness I reached out to others!!! Because as human beings we reach out in our loneliest hour's, as the amazing part I told you I cried and prayed to God even with others to send me mine real true soulmate!!! One who will love me for me and me inside and me for mine mistakes and faults I have because I'm far from perfect as you say im some perfect being haaa! lol.... But you know how amazing God is Jane? See people always question God asking him why isn't their prayers answered by him? And why isn't he listening to them.. Or hear them? He does hear us. and alot of times God gives us the ànswers back right in front of us and we don't even know it or he'll give his answer not the way we want it meaning not on our own time but his and not always the way we want our prayers answered.. As I kept praying for years as many do and pretty much gave up!!! Then after I got out of prison in mine loneliest lowest time!!! That's when it happened SLAP BAM!!!! On mine doorstep!! Mine angel God sent me!!! The soulmate I learned for years.. Since before mine birth was sent to me Jane. The one who's look's mind soul spirit and voice hair eyes lips thinking all I ever wanted... YOU!!!! And you are always so afraid I'm going to leave you because you feel I deserve better and that you aren't good enough? Are you kidding me? YOU are MORE than worthy and good enough, and I'm never leaving the answer to mine prayer that God finally gave me!!!! Even in death I shall find you... We will meet in this life no matter how long it takes and no matter if we can't talk for a while at times.. I'm NOT leaving you mine Filipino rose!!!!! I'm going nowhere Jane!!!!! I'm so happy with you, I've never known happiness until you fell from the heaven's!!!! You are mine only peace other than God!!! You are mine comfort, best friend, soulmate, mine lover, mine ALL!!! and this is a letter for all to see to bend on mine knee's for mine queen, in front of your throne: to tell you....

THANK YOU FOR SAVING MINE LIFE
FOR LOVING ME
for doing all for me noone else has or ever could....
You are me
I am thee.
I'll forever Love you earl Jane nagley
And honestly daily mine love grows for you.. Dont know how when I'm already madddddddd for you!!! Lol this hearts gonna pop because I love you sooo much and I wanted all to see this to show you that you are worth more than anything on earth!! You are many other's angel to not just me!!!!
Especially mine!!!!!!
And mine other half
Mine half
Me period
As I am you.. ..
You are me!!!!


With love forever and always
Your king
And soulmate and lover.....

Brandon Cory nagley





©Brandon nagley
©Earl Jane Nagley dedication ( Filipino rose) soulmate
©Lonesome poet's poetry

I don't write of amare
Out of boredom or dying thought's
I write for mine mi amour'
Because it's mine heart she hath got.

I don't write of amour'
Out of lonesomeness or to get attention
I write out mine souls truth
Because I loveth a godly invention...

I writeth for mine ELSA
Because that's where love taketh us...
I writeth for mine ELSA
Because it's her who to me is a must.

I writeth for mine ELSA
Because many ages for her I hadst to wait...
I got lost from her before
Yet met her at heaven's gate...

I writeth to mine soulmate
Because she's all to me,
And though tis she canst seeith it all right now...
Trust me, I do see....



©Brandon nagley
©Lonesome poet's poetry
©Elsa angelica dedication

Spacing out, allowing my mind to wander far, far off,
Into the distance, into a dream out of reach, my personal heaven,
A distorted world where meaning has no meaning and time stands still, space is instable and the melancholy of lonesomeness prevails,
Clouds, everlasting, ever orbiting floating islands and upside down waterfalls, yet I cannot share this pleasure with anyone, I'm alone,
If I were to believe I could fly, I would be free.
Not bound by physics dragging me down, not bound by gravity,
I keep this place dear to me, for it is a world made for escape,
Only if I could lose myself in the fragnance of this dimension,
My poor body calls my soul back to where it thinks it belongs,
The dream of pleasure, with a carefree attitude is burning away,
Reality is cruel and dark, with no comfort a place with no heart,
But certainly I can hope with all my might even though weak,
That this place I am carried to when my mind is giving away my soul,
Will take me in forever one day, so I won't have to wake up.
After all, I don't have to die in a dream..

~ Umi

She knoweth what I'm going to sayest
Before I sayest it;

She understandeth mine heart and pain
Before mine blood displayeth it;

She layeth me to sleep
When I get sleepy;

She layeth her head virtually upon mine chest
When I'm in weeping;

She Whisper's she loveth me
Before I canst speaketh it back;

When I'm on the wrong road, losing direction to mine soul,
Her and God get me back on track;

When I feeleth lonesome
She filleth up that lonesomeness;

When the anguish get's noisome
She giveth me her all, her best.

Earl Jane nagley is mine soulmate
Tis I'm more than blessed;

We art both preordained, from the beginning, eternal flame's
We art life, life is us, we art soulmates.
Indeed......

We art soulmates!!!


©Brandon nagley
©Lonesome poet's poetry
©Earl Jane nagley dedication ( Filipino rose) soulmate of mine
©Hari and Reyna incorporated

When I set out for Lyonnesse,
A hundred miles away,
The rime was on the spray,
And starlight lit my lonesomeness
When I set out for Lyonnesse
A hundred miles away.

What would bechance at Lyonnesse
While I should sojourn there
No prophet durst declare,
Nor did the wisest wizard guess
What would bechance at Lyonnesse
While I should sojourn there.

When I came back from Lyonnesse
With magic in my eyes,
All marked with mute surmise
My radiance rare and fathomless,
When I came back from Lyonnesse
With magic in my eyes!

my mind tends to ooze with a negativity

that leaks out & into my already searing

and prolonged wounds;

within this ragged & treacherous steam of consistency

I find myself laid out upon the very gravelish grounds

that I goofishly juggle with on a lazen basis

sometimes there

sometimes here

but a lot of times just nowhere at all.

where I disappear to I couldn’t be sure,

the empty screen in front of & behind me

don’t speak of much

but they do tend to catch my demiseful falls

every now & then;

seems these cavernous valleys have a soothing touch

to them,

a loosely held comfort that I know

better than I seem to know myself at times

and at times I wonder

what I am supposed to be protesting

within these grotesqueful lines

of a beautifully laid out tragedy,

for even here I do not feel

within the bounds of my own mental safety nets

but maybe an unthoughtful falling & tumbling

will do me some good?

to be comfortable with my own deathly summons,

I write to edge the demons within

to a borderline of both peace & content,

for truthfully no set of letters

can taint me as much as I might allow them too

although I can tend to lean towards the waywards

of an apathetic crustacean

through my own carelessness & ill suited

self brought upon lonesomeness

…

sometimes I cannot tell what is right,

or maybe best is a better way to put it.

for I long for a connection of connections

and equally equivalent siphonings,

but many a times I seem to find

that my end of the line has gone stale,

quiet, a desperate yet eerie monotoned scale

of solemn notes left to ring in the ears

of those who are strongly enough

to take the time to hear,

and for those that are not afraid to stare

deeply into their own darkened & blazeful caverns,

I am forever grateful.

i.

O' mine asawa, mine novel put away for millennia,
Brute man hast hidden thee from view, thou hast been burdened by men's crucifying, thy fear's art of lonesomeness; as many hast left thee, As I've known thine tears. I've seen and watched thy fear's, over the year's thine heart was bleeding.

ii.

Though whilst thou was leaking from thine wound's, I was keeping track on high, from the moon, and universal sky, from the nebula they calleth God's eye; I made plan's to cometh near. Thither below where I hadst none purpose, other than thee; I asked ourn maker to pusheth me into the sea of the great Pacific ocean, I hadst come with mine love, and incorporeal potion's.

iii.

Afore thine nativity, I hadst known thee a whilst, though as an angel thy falling to the atmosphere madeth thee forget thy memory; and divine self. Though I remembered thou, as thy soulmate from ages passed: I waited, with the great originator, I hadst beseeched him to seeing thee again; mine beloved, mine consort of other realm related. As Elohim kneweth thou was mine Filipino rose, mine all, and best friend: he granted me back heaven, as I landed into thy hand's.





©Brandon Nagley
©Lonesome poets poetry
©Earl Jane Nagley-Filipino rose dedicated

We stopped talking weeks ago
except for the occasional “hi”.

How I wished we could’ve hung out more and been friends.
For some reason you stayed in your bedroom
Every time you were here.

You’ve moved out without a “goodbye”.

If we meet in the future I’m sure it won’t be more than a “hi”
if even that.

My friend you’re gone
in your lonesomeness
with no ears for me,
escaping conversation
so that you may fulfill your desire.

I beseech and implore for just one kiss
I crumble to the ivory walls around me;
I seeketh and explore in the darkly abyss
And noone is near to fully arouse and supplyeth mine need's.

Just a simple Bonjour, to haveth an opera of amour'
To be as simple infant's, climbing mountain's and shore's;
Forgetting the world, lost into ourn own dimension
Yet that's not what I'll findeth, I've excepted mine jail sentence.



©Brandon nagley
©Lonesome poet's poetry

perhaps it is the weather
a prolonged absence of the sun
or presence of the winter cold
or just a temporary fashion

the media as well as many webbéd sites
simply abound with dreary blather
     of lovers lost and death so cold
     the lonesomeness of every single soul
     and how s/he suffers when s/he writes
spelled out at length with no discretion

we know that people suffer from depression
or unquenchable anger at the world
and how through proper treatments
you can considerably relieve the pain

fix them in words is one of them
    but may not be enough
sometimes a mix of pills and pen
may do the trick and help you
    write yourself through your misty prison walls
    discover unlocked doors hidden in plain sight
    step out into the sunshine
        from the darkest night

you are the sun
    whose radiance illuminates the world
    lends brilliance to your life
    sheds light on everything you’ve done

and soon you’ll notice
even the weather is getting bether …

Dedication:

Nectare bred of an artist's haught testament—
        brings only stunted buds of tastelessness.
Be it naught for the height in numerous tidal of Muse—
        to cause the strike of warmth in bruise.

Upon the cheeks shadow'd in might—
        strength of amour upon near-sight.
You!—Blossom, are of a frightful power—
        to journey nestled mind of dark tower.

As though a hawk perched higher than the peak—
        of mountainous and controlling streaks,
Colourblind by potent affair lost—
        by centuries of sicken'd fever crossed.

By and by another name, honeyed pursuit—
        yearning that cause a poet becoming mute.
Meagerly, he instead scribes his burning allegory—
        that shall cause a life—eternal fragmentary.


Dangers of Kimberleigh

“Love Jo all your days, if you choose, but don't let it spoil you, for it's wicked to throw away so many good gifts because you can't have the one you want.”
― Louisa May Alcott, "Little Women"

I.

When the morning demands you and I—
        our ghosts shall pass empty resides,
Against fields where lines opposing light, force and bind—
        of Angel's breath and Dæmon's spine.

Of shrieks louder than their first meeting's kiss—
        residing now—perfection upon midnight's bliss,
Abiding near the tender gardens upon the blinding dark—
        creating haste of love-song made by grave Skylark.

Who in joyous play—should cause collapse—
        towards serene, augmented lapse.
Lapse of falling, of where gentle screams—
        of every child that's ever been,

Who stroke themselves against empty glass—
        and where visions pray upon the grasp,
Of wind—Of blinding—Of melody—
        to hold faint—Immortality.


II.

This shall be where morning seeks—
        no longer calming of beauty's cheek.
Instead to lash with vain and hostile mount—
        crimson over dashed and harsh doubt.

Until image engraved by forgiving rite—
        speaking neglect of fiend or fiendish blight.
In-versed—coole angelic heart to passéd—
        passage beside Lilac's memory in mortal castéd.

In the unwashed Earth, where the unwashed play—
        'till they unfairly capture it from younglings— Away.
Lonesomeness of watchtowers in gossamer's breast—
        when airy words strangled from bless.
  
Reachéd by the hand—abide in fable—
        quiet tho—in fruitation, a single silver Maple.
Shyly envisioned inside salvation's solitude—
        where tenderness drowns tenderéd concludes.


III.

The sister was lovely—inside my sight—
        in our union—created Nature's first night.
Through our throats rendered fragile lullaby—
        which slaughtered silence and made soldiers cry.

Her bristles—exploit in darkness—I could not see—
        or merely recollect in memory.
A mouth moving inside of mine—
        creatures in mawkery of untouched divine.

Eyes whom beatéd harder than the breeze—
        to remind me—gently of the ease.
Of being caught in cognitive stance.
        which leaves surrender to in traditional, disciplined dance.

Upon the backs of universal forestry—
        and inside their stomachs to where we would meet.
Offended to death by requiem—
        made inside our faint dream's drum.


IV.

Where dreamer's would lash upon in endless screams—
        innumerable Rubies ruin'd before their first gleam.
Upon reflection in lover's loss—
        diminished to demise before their first gloss.

It is upon the fool's finest end—
        where lies his fantasy—condemned.
The jester who remains as undefeat—
        before death shall cause lackluster's retreat.

Unaware tho, in current mode—
        as body by body closely will hold.
And messages of Gold conspire in streaks—
        immersed—affection in mind eternally correlates oblique.

Ringing and humming throughout what laid—
        against blonde grass from Sin was made.
Refraction's cast that betrayed—to promise me—
        endless nights of haunting harmonies.


V.

Held tightly in grieving bourne—
        broken—in new blood is sworn.
Across the snow-cover'd Evergreens—
        where the temptress grave is left unseen.

Not upon her kiss—did darkness fall—
        alone—in shining pieces did crawl,
Against creator—and thus creator hence—
        bitter loving shrouded by bare defense.

As her finite skin had laid eternal flesh—
        of what laid inside Pine's parting mesh.
Holding and crying out for uncertainty—
       feelings moaned into sudden Mercenaries.

Morose and fledgling in their stand—
        spiritéd to Death's light misunderstand,
Of peerless eyes and broken brooks by the sea—
        casting ruined cloth over our Evergreens.


VI.

Unfurnished dawn may scour for length of furnished night—
        quick—until mirroréd ebbed ocean does wrong.
To consume the idles of Man's afraid mind—
        fairest—lest His idles struck into divine.

Exclaiméd none tho, in archaic lust—
        deceased—firmest in high robust.
Where pleasure finds comforted pause—
        inside arched-back in neglected cause.

Betray the shallow grimace flee—
        and ethereal composed by the breeze.
Lies delicate delusion before sorrow—
        that shall thieve away the Artist's morrow.

And in thievery is where the Angels lie—
        angelic beasts with unlawful guise,
In courts—castrated by the throat—
        hardened in assumption by blackened elope.

You were my first boyfriend.
I was smitten over someone liking me.
I didn’t even care that I was your rebound.
You compared me to the blonde character in an anime because you wanted me to be perfect.
You treated me badly and broke up with me for other girls
who seemed better than I.
Then, you’d come back to me,
because no one but me had low enough self-esteem to date you.
Sure, they didn’t know the real you; like I did.
They knew the goofy nerd who was in the friendzone.
Finally, I left because I knew I deserved better.
You cried.
Lonesomeness,
is not fun after you’ve been next to someone after two years.
What could you do?
Pitiful, shameful, *** with your ex.
I always regretted it.
Whether it was right when you came over
or right after
or when you left.
One time you said that I “didn’t last long”
because when I regretted it halfway through I told you to stop.
A year goes by.
I pay a visit to your house.
I mostly miss your mom;
ya’ll were my second family.
I had nothing to do before making an hour drive to my niece’s for babysitting.
I dropped in.
I stopped by.
One of my biggest mistakes of my life on that February afternoon.
I watched TV with your mom.
You were sleeping.
She made food so I went to wake you.
We went downstairs and ate.
I asked if you wanted to come outside while I smoked.
You did.
I told you about someone I was seeing,
about how they enjoyed the way I gave head.
Big deal.
To you
because
you said that my head “*****”
I should “prove it” to you that I was good at it.
I refused because I don’t need to prove myself to anyone
especially you.    
Flash forward to your room.
Here’s the part where you can blame me if you’d like.
for going to your room.
How was I supposed to know what you wanted to take from me?
A friendly tickle fight turned into you on top of me.
Force kissing me.
I pushed you off.
Gravity was against me.
When you finally rose
I said “What the **** is wrong with you?”
Why were you doing this to me...?
Without skipping a beat.
I got my answer
that’d replay in my mind
forever.
“You can’t turn me on without turning me off.”
Shock.
Complete Shock.
You wanted my body
and according to you
I was only there for your pleasure.
That’s all I was.
An object for your enjoyment.
I immediately left your room.
You tried to stop me,
you tried to say sorry,
but the damage was done.
You marked yourself.
I had to pretend
in front of your mom
that nothing happened
until I left.
I cried many times that day.
Tears behind my eyes while watching TV right after with her
counting the minutes until I was supposed to leave.
Wailing on my way to my brother’s
Thoughts that it was my fault
that I caused it
while my niece slept peacefully.
And more tears when I told my mom
and even more when she told me to stay quiet
because your mom was already going through a lot.

I was objectified
disrespected
and silenced that day
in February before Valentine’s Day
2016.

He was there with
me, now he's there
with her. Or him,
them, maybe all alone.

He makes things better
by slipping endorphins and
stimulants of all different
shades down his little-boy throat.

He used to tickle my
sides and put kisses on
my shell, that held my
cerebellum in all nice and snug.

We would go no where;
Never get anything done.
We would make small
talk about growing up.

I would think about him and
think that he wasn't enough.
He was nice and gave
me all that he had got.

All of the lonesomeness, all of
the sad, all of the mad crept about.
Past my hazel irises and
began to erupt, mushing out.

Out of my ears, my pores, some right
out of my mouth. That day in March
my hypothalamus flip-flopped and
resigned from its job.

The boy who was there fell
right out of touch. An automatic
reflex kicked in quicker than
a frog catching a bug.

My legs lay criss-crossed and
bony, unshaven as I picture
him picturing his old best
friend, who he left and lost.

He day dreams of being aged and
playing Go Fish. Crackling at me
to draw, I grab his prune-textured
hand. In real life he starts to cry.

He sets down his room temperature can
of Mountain Dew. Grabs a couple of different
colored pills and goes out to party
in attempt to help him not remember.

The day I left, I forgot to pack self-consciousness.
It was all too easy to reach into the mirror
and pull out my imperfections like saltwater taffy.
Then I ate them.
I wondered as I boarded the plane,
I wondered why my hands weren’t clenched in unrevealing fists,
I wondered why my eyes didn’t flicker to the person
behind me in front of me to my left to my right over here over there.
Perhaps my eyes were now focused on the clouds above and new lands below.

The day I left, I neglected to pack loneliness.
I roamed a new city, so alive, my lungs made room for more crisp
cigarette-infused air and I sat on the steps of a grand opera hall for hours
watching people walk, talk, listen, look, shop, love, learn, pretend, remember.
I understood why my arms did not ache
from the strain of carrying this lonesomeness,
I understood why there was so much beauty
in being a person submerged among thousands of people.
I realized it was a privilege I had been abusing for far too long.

The day I left, I refused to pack fear.
It unsettled my stomach and dampened most of the fun.
I left it there, tucked and stowed neatly away under my plane seat,
sending it back to where I came from and hoping
that the flight attendants would do a thorough cleaning.
I realized why some people got lost on purpose,
that there was fearlessness in not knowing
your north from south from west from east.

The day I came back, I carried
another missing piece of my vagabond heart.
I found it drifting in the strains of a street musician’s Vivaldi,
found it etched into the wooden signs above cafes and bakeries
found it in the spitting passion of lips and linguistics.
I recognized the part of me that was scattered across continents
and I brought it back home.

Tis
Weds
June 24th
Seeketh mine queen
mi amour of mine dreams,
No I do no seeketh her or loveth her out of mine own
Lonesomeness,

If I sought one out of lonesomeness
It shalt not be love!!!!!

But she's mine true amare
I needeth on this chilled wed's night
Because she's once again disappeared
Into the moon's light....

Tis I think
I shalt go to bed
Wherein
I canst dream
Of her
Tonight!!!

What doth thou invest thine time into?
Is it watching sports?
Is it t.v?
Is it *******?
Is it lust?
Is it media in all forms?
Is it money?
Food?
Drink?
Is it memoribillia?
Is it the metal car?
That wilt just rust and ruin and not last........
Is it mansion, home or shack?
Is it dope?
***?
Money orders?
Checks?
Is it hatred?
And greed?
Cutting others down?
Crying?
Is it lonesomeness?
When thou aren't really lonely?
Is it a fake smile
To please the phonies?
Is it thinking of tommorrow
When we've only today?
Is it thy looks?
Pride amazed?
Is it shopping?
Clothes?
Silver?
Gold?
Hath thou tried to focus
Not on these wordly things..............
But focus on thy lovers!!!!!!!
Husbands,
Wives,
Sons
Mothers
Daughter's
Pets(anima­ls period)
Brothers
Sisters
Aunties
Uncles
Cousins
Neices
Nephews
Fa­mily period
Or the one thou art in love with
Romance wise?
Hath thou  done this today?
Or keeping that love secret???
Tommorrow might not come
Better make the move,
Husbandman
Wife
Father
Son
Lovers
To be one......
Tis
Tis I sayeth
Tommorrow
Might not cometh....
Tis I do believe
Tommorrow don't always cometh!!!!!!

Bon anniversaire, brother Eddie,
Continue in fondness;
To those in hurt
And blood
Shedding.

Felix natalis, compeer in Christ,
Showeth his mercy, love,
Sacrifice.

eyd mawlid saeid, man of God,
Like the Messiah hadst died
For thee; dieth for other's,
Spread the gospel as seed.

Charoúmena genéthlia, Edward
The star, a light amongst the darkness,
The soul to those lost to death's kiss;
Teacheth who the man was who hadst
Come in the flesh, to hath his hand's
Nailed, and head crowned with thorn's;
Mocked and scorned, his heart
Didst mourn, giving up his
Holy ghost, for thou and me.

Penblwydd hapus, disciple
For Yeshua, mayest another
Year of thy birth bringeth
beatitude not curse, as
Yahweh is thine church,
As the spirit is thine weapon.
Against Satan's doubting's
And question's, against the
Lonesomeness and heaviness,
Against the sin's and burden,
Against those who know thee
Not, whom hath not loved thee,
But thee they forgot, remembereth
Dearest saint, one day thou shalt
Hath a Robe pearlescent colored
White as snow, knowing heaven
Is thine place and home. Happy
Birthday O' happy blessed birthday:
To thee man of Yeshua ha'mashiach.
Man of the creator, creation and rock,
Wherein thine foundation is built
Upon stone and not sand...



©Brandon Nagley
©Lonesome poet's poetry
©Edward star birthday dedication

Eyes of golden fields,
And hair of flaming sun,
Beauty of Aphrodite,
Voice of a siren.
Her sad gaze
Grasps you soul
And rasps your breath.
She's an unknowing temptress
Claiming lonesomeness
And strength of solidarity.

Dramatics fill her life
While tears penetrate her ducts
Only to be wiped dry
By her smooth white digits.

The opinions she illuminates
Are half always harsh
Half always right.
Yet in the gloom
She watches the man
She bows her song
And swallows the shine
Of that which she gazes upon.

She drinks softly
Falls to the cotton
Falls into self realization.
Her karma awaits
Sticking to her endo
Like fresh golden cream,
****** from the hive of greed.

She puts the unwanted to obscurity
And places her dreams in a bottle
To be carried from safety.

Her pain goes unnoticed
As she presses the glass
And downs its purity
To reach her haven.

I truly wish to save her,
For her beauty astounds me
And her love is secretive
Hidden to all those who seek it.

If only a door existed
For the key I posess.

When you love, and you can't bare it any longer, when everything you shared became toxic waste and your body fills with the fluid of unknown pain. When sadness sinks into you, its weight crushing your chest and lungs. When sadness weighs you like your own flesh but more of it, and that weight of lonesomeness and pain.. You think.. How can I withstand this? Then you will hold love, like an unclaimed newborn in your arms and you'll say, Yes, I will take you and I will love again.

when in piles of tiny heaps
shapely mounds beneath our hands
seasoned stand on grainy shores
arduously may grasp the sands

wavy spikes of flapping sea
thrown to castles terror bound
are screaming yet so perfectly
tranquil as may silence sound

the grip of august imagery
while storms upon or crash its faith
dwells in floods of eddies lost
to empty fancies abdicate

laid in sea of solemn voices
do twilights flush in garb of light
narrated by swirling chords
shivering break apart tonight

albeit the ebbs of moments rife
drench may dreams of saline pain
shovel tides preserved in drops
slip through fingers, dissipate

venturous as lonesomeness
of scarlet night's insomnia
stubborn hunts the night's last star
in delusion finds panacea

the elixir of destiny
solace in carnal myths of dawn
and joys which heart incarcerates
in barren cages of a conch

The bluest of oceans
Reside
In your beautiful eyes
Your gaze speaks eons
Of your hermit heart
Yet not one speck, I sense
Of lonesomeness
In your life
All I can pick
Is your joyful vibe
Your horsepower mind
Intrigues me
How you solve mysteries
That bind you in a world
Smaller than your universe
How you escape, lost in an expanse
Where you feel more at home
How with the darkening of the sky
As the snow reflects moonlight
Your energies rise in unison with the tide
How your howl feels more like a hymn to meditate on
What are you, wise soul?
Such beauty wrapped in mush and fur

and again, the gritty path,
for visiting the houses, ruined.
time fled and life stood still,
strangled in suspension points.

i come, to collect lonesomeness,
feed my senses upon bygones.

window sills to inner spaces.
motherhood.

there, the place of a fire,
the grime inks a flame in black,
silhouetted.

crock pots, iron pots,
cracked, bumped.
soup. boiling.smoking.
cendrillons wrinkling
by the fireplace
in yellowished orange blossom gowns.

a skeleton of a bed.

leaning roof.

a wall in blue.

the view from the back window.
the door to the backyard.

houses grow blind.
i come
to lend them my eyes.
willingly.

eventually they'll have me,
bind me, seed me,
a tree-creeper to sight
the swallows, tell them
we have a vacant eave
in a falling roof.

The entrance shows a light, shines so bright
But over the fence there lies, something not right
a crumb of disgrace, caught in a rat race
down rated to your face, i can't keep pace

why do your eyes, break me down in time
they are just lies, im of weak mind
cursed to suffer replays
of my greatest blunders,
game on the line i fumble,
trip up and stumble,
but on my lips your soft kiss,
has me convinced my shot didnt miss

they say life is for pleasure
but ive yet had my measure
of a peaceful humble home
your boisterous figure,
your blossoming presence,
written in my tome,
taken to the tomb,
lost in your essence,
a billowing plume
of pyroclastic passion

then you're gone,
where have you gone?
how long, oh how long,
will i wait to hear,
your quaking voice,
quelling my fear,
i never had a choice.

the power of one
the game ive won
a song unsong
its time for fun
take it and run

the playing field is *****,
oh god my visions blurry,
im seeing double trouble
a blinding rainbow puddle
hidden amongst the muck

my heart's come unstuck
my headless body collapses
lost in your seaweed romances
twisted and tightened around my ankles
pulling me down til the water sound kills
the song of an ocean set sail
on a ship soggy and frail

who knew out there for me
was waiting a queen bee
ruling the effervescent roost
of a wondrous world juiced
and blended to a paste
ripe to smear and taste

on your supple skin
lick and suckle sin
tuck me in
with your grin
the tidal force
free of remorse
can't get any worse
than lonesomeness
let us transgress
sky etherized
re-materialize

the power of one
the game ive won
a song unsong
its time for fun
take it and run

I'm not in figedty and in perplex manner
whenever thine populace aren't in sync
onto bridging in the gaps
  that's not so befitting--
well-intentioned unique individuals
and somehow finding uniformity,
ways to connect, naturally,
--lies into thinking, sweetly,
of the welfare o' others firstly.

whilst entitled to do as
he pleases with himself
so far as it in no wise,
interferes with one's
rights to live at peace
with himself, otherwise!
in haste o' the modern-day- pressures,
is such a waste
in the Truest deepest sense,
we ought not missed eternal ideals
o' t'is' life's difficulties,
whoso, nonconformist,
mine earthly near at hand.
as we all set ourselves to bite a bit
o ' that and apiece
o' life's lion-shares
alongside pie in sky-
biting the hand that feeds us,
[ so to speak...]
for an average joe,
Suchlike give much thought....
Unbeknownst, waiting and longing
As yet benighted throughout the mooning
darknest and cloudest dilemmas
ALAS, lest alone, coincides
with dread o' e'ery dusk
smothering haziness
in love -when-it melts...
AS nightfall subsides
up the ole buttermilk sky- full o' star's twinkling - sighing and tearing apart..
unyielding enough unto my innermost
along with the falseness o' being trick
partly because o' being majestic
practically - realistic
In life's perpetual wisdom I so carry by far. .
Thereby,  we, but learned the storms o' life:
how anyone conducts-as-antagonistics?.
Pessimistics
Agnostics
solely wound up to grievous lull,
and wish to conquer undesirable
tendencies and kiss o ' death!
UPPERMOSTLY, vastly regained,
moreover, abreast-again
Oh my good gosh, it's therapuetic!
HENCEFORTH unto
picking
myself up after I have
been knocked - down-
TO KEEP on when e'erything seems to be against all odds o' the "blame game"...
back into nothing which spells boundlessly..
so can I right away pick up the pieces?

and overcome these unsettling uncertainties
o ' living life from day in and day out.
truth o ' the matter of - fact- of thine ingratitude world!
People in general get entangled
with busy-nest-web
amidst foreboding fretfulness
that unravels fleeting worries
about to and fro-
uproaring ebbs of tides
o ' the seafaring winds - blowing..
just as it is happening nowadays
up to cold-hearted - shoulders
moment full o' melancholies
thus thou,  one don't reach out
nor canst not care out and about
but just be on their own self
DOOMED himself ungrateful spirit!
seen as egotistical maniacs
contrary to my beliefs
and my faithfulness..
LET alone -Thee bestows
unceasingly triumphs
just because it's okay
not to be okay
to say the least
It's un-manly
and play- decoy
YET LIFE,
moves forward under
DIVINE CONVOY!
INASMUCH,  manipulative PLOY
to mind one's beauty
or disguise chaste morals
for the uttering dews to
injure or harm a'other
in turn to get "square even-steven"
SOWITH holds true with beguilement
think for a moment,
I'll meet that person
halfway between the lines
with patience and its silver linings. .
hasty words that slows any anger
whereforth, oblivion takes over scar!
that's luring to a smiling brood...
Imperfections are what we are made of,
Hey, the noblest prettiest
yeah, at bay with silence
I LOOK within....
First off, God on my side. ..
For He heareth at my bedside..

Within thine foundation
o ' thine goodness
Sure that ne'er fails. .
Hopefully, get rid o' the evil!
While I was dancing with the devil!
So does thereby,
wilst ever bubble up
if thou languish
to each its own rights
to dig his own heels..
and the outright layer of its color, creed,
and value from stern course o ' self-discipline,
such and such a rearrangement o' character
whom stands to live a sane contemplative state o' the mind..
launching anew,
better on higher-end
level o' spiritual
aspirations;
glamouring stance
Bestowing light to others
Sharing - LOVE for others
shouldn't be in rash,
indecisiveness,
rather, intellectually
with good reasonings,
good judgements
passed thine genial compliments,
WHEREIN, thou soled- loving-heart dwells
insofar as mere,
happy-ness-charms,
Mine thy lonesomeness
-the-soul-into - satisfying
at ease the love I deserve
hankering and longingly-
Even tho' forever-waiting
in its stillness-
I'd bewriting it down
and speak my mind
in any shape form,
aforesaid
and done
bewailing free verses,  
thus,
soul-lonest-mine swells
A LA MODE
Essentially,
at my Fervent HAVEN!

The boy was alone
alone while surrounded
by the phantoms of what was,
a torturous lonesomeness
which hardened him
what was once warm and vibrant
was slowly cooling
like the Earth
after the cosmic soup of the big bang
He wasn't quite ready for it
to be tossed into the pit
of living and breathing
he never asked for it
but he knew he had to be tough
stiff lipped
deadly,
so he quelled the complaints
tucked them down in his heart
which had adopted the pace
of war machines
his view had shifted
a world once of wonder
was now infuriating
he wanted to end it
one great final bang
to end all bangs
so that he might be left
to whimper
to be warm again
to miss everything
he had just sent
flaming into oblivion
he was on the reaper's path
a dead man walking

Redemption came forth
and hit him
like a moment of adolescent embarrassment
it wasn't the girl herself
rather,
what she stood for
in his eyes
she was afflicted by the same world as he
and yet she found ways to dance
and sing
and love
he admired that most,
little by little
she coaxed him forward
back from beyond the brink
of primordial passions
back from beyond the tipping point
between helping and hurting,
slowly his anger changed
from something bitter and lifeless
into a fiery explosion
splitting the night sky
a second sun
she showed him how to shape it,
direct it,
sharpen it,
she showed him
how his aim may stay true,
and she made him deadlier
because she gave him a purpose
and a target,
somewhere to go.
And before long
he could remember
what it was like
to still have innocence
his rage simmered down
and became healthy passion
healing and assuring
no longer a sword
but a shield
and he had the notion
that maybe one day
this creature from on high
could even allow him
not to just give love
but to accept it
which was the greatest
gift of all

Leaking through my veins,
Seeping past my heart
It freezes my soul,
Can’t get past the cold
air of the dark-
ness
that I breathe in,
Scream to fight off
But it won’t stay off
I’m betrayed and I’m frayed to shards of
an old ghost:
Lost my glow
Lost that elected touch.

Oh I want the goodness,
But the goodness don’t want me.
Or could it be I’ve fought
for too long, now it
seems i’m not as strong due to
desensibility, ******* the passion out of me
I’m made to resonate kindness
Emulate a bright bliss
But I grab for transience,
Trading that omniscient light for a couple cents
In comparison, where’s that dream of intelligence
busting from my heart and spirit’s senses,
Now I spend my days hopping fences,
breathing relentlessly heaving from thinking,
endlessly drinking, my mind has been sinking
and I am seemingly drowned out,
Found out,
I’m nothing without some fearlessness,
I called out some where in the Out There
My ears shut out the world,
at last, my last inch of hope is straining
to pick up a sound,
gracefully deigning to
reach me:

I’m not a lost soul,
adrift in some dark cold
sea on an isolated glacier
composed of only lonesomeness,
and ice water.