Good Morning World, I See You Haven't Changed,

I See Your Skies Do Not Offer Blue This Morning,

And Your Pavements Are Cold And Grey,

Good Afternoon Heart, I See You Are Heavy,

I See You Are Dragging, Just Like Everyday,

I See Butterflies No Longer Kiss You,

Good Evening Sunset, I See You Are The Same,

Opening The Gate For The Stars To Shine,

Whispering The Day Gone,

Good Night Milky Way, I See You Still Loom,

I See You Are Still The One Who Harbors The Angels,

Who Have Given Me The Kiss Of Sleep,

Good Morning World....

Blesses Joni

among the greatest songwriters and voices

her words:

I came upon a child of God
He was walking along the road
And I asked him, where are you going
And this he told me...
I'm going on down to Yasgur's farm
I'm going to join in a rock 'n' roll band
I'm going to camp out on the land
I'm gonna try and get my soul free

We are stardust
We are golden
And we've got to get ourselves
Back to the garden

Then can I walk beside you
I have come here to lose the smog
And I feel to be a cog in something turning
Well maybe it is just the time of year
Or maybe it's the time of man
I don't know who l am
But ya know life is for learning

We are stardust
We are golden
And we've got to get ourselves
Back to the garden

By the time we got to Woodstock
We were half a million strong
And everywhere there was song and celebration
And I dreamed I saw the bombers
Riding shotgun in the sky
And they were turning into butterflies
Above our nation

We are stardust
Billion-year-old carbon
We are golden
Caught in the devil's bargain
And we've got to get ourselves
Back to the garden

hi. my name is mia.
i’m 5 foot 7 and a half and i weigh 132 pounds.
i have blonde hair and blue eyes and i wear a lot of grey.
on my good days i’m great
but never quite as great as your average 18 year old
and on my bad days
on my bad days
i’m barely human at all
i’m a bloodless vessel with panic running through my veins
it’s not just your average anxiety
no i don’t have butterflies in my stomach
i have birds of prey flapping their wings against my throat.
on my bad days my heart races like it’s late for the train and
i swear i must be two hundred degrees
on my bad days my entire body convulses
like a demon is fighting it’s way out of every inch of me and honestly i wish it would
just to make all of this go away
on my bad days i pull on my hair and i pick at my skin
because my hands don’t know what to do with themselves
i spend my bad days on the bathroom floor hugging a toilet bowl and
thinking of any excuse to get myself to the hospital
i can’t open my mouth to speak but if i could then i wouldn’t be able to beside between
“please help me” and “go away”
it’s hart to tell if i’m sweating or if i just didn’t realize i was crying
on my bad days i’m 99% sure i’m dying
on my bad days i swallow a xanax with my pride
and the thought that i’m completely incapable of fixing myself
on my good days i’m great
but i still can’t shake that i won’t get better
and i can never have kids because they’ll just end up like me
but who could ever love someone like this anyway?
even on my good days i always seem to be complaining
and on my good days i still pick out my own traits in everyone that i hate
so i’m really never great. and there’s really no such thing as a good day
i only have not so bad days

This little girl,

she always thought
that life's filled with happiness
and joy.

She always thought
that her parents loved
each other, and there
wasn't a single problem.

She always thought
that wishing on
wishing stars
worked.

She believed
that one day her
prince charming
would save her from a tower.

She trusted
anyone
just because they said
they'd keep her secret.

But she was wrong,
so very wrong.

This darkness soon
grew inside her;
drowning
her.

Her teddy bear
was no longer
a friend, but an
enemy.

She stopped believing.
She stopped dreaming.
She stopped trying.
She stopped living.

But do you know what happened?
This little girl
who once thought about
butterflies and dolls?

she grew up.

I don't need your sympathy,
just someone to see the haze I see,
I don't need my memories,
just a reality that believes I'm not crazy,

I don't need your golden caging,
just an education that's costing money,
I don't need your loyalty,
just some stability to keep us happy,

I don't need “factually”,
just a true, honest identity,
I don't need anxiety,
just some butterflies to keep it exciting,

I don't need a friend,
just a person wanting to smile with me,
I don't need your love,
just the dog lying by me as I'm dying.

i am no longer afraid when the butterflies fly away because butterflies only fly to help flowers grow

All the voices in my head whispering that I should run and hide,
Cause we both now this love won't survive but at least I tried.
And I saw you walking down the pavement hand in hand with someone new,
I couldn't help but feel like a dark shade of the colour blue.
All those butterflies you feel I'm sure she gets them too,
Makes me wonder if you felt it too back when it was just me and you.
                   Every time I watch her cross your mind,
                                                                ­                           I'll find the words to say **goodbye

Love, you told me once that
Butterflies don’t lie
So I knew I was in love
The moment I met your eyes

Love, you told me once that
You can’t solve all my problems
But I knew you were fibbing because
Standing next to you, the hurt is forgotten

Love, you told me once that
You want my arms around you
But I knew you were just kidding because
You were gone before I could hold you

Love, you told me once that
You don’t always think when you talk
So I knew you didn’t want me,
Yet I still sold you my heart.

Love, I’ll tell you once that
I love you so **** much.
Love, I’ll tell you twice,
Three or four times if you want.

What's happening to you?
Your face blushes
making red roses jealous of your hue

What's happening to you?
You start shaking like a leaf in autumn
weightless and easily moved

What's happening to you?
You never look him in the eye
for fear of being to obvious

What's happening to you?
A single hello makes you curl
like a shy teenager on the verge of experiencing
"emotions"

What's happening to you?
Your old enough to have mastered such things
Your the maestro of your own heartbeats
but there's something different

What's happening to you?
Your shell has hardened enough
to be affected by butterflies
inside and all around

What's happening to you?
are
you
feeling
again?

capture wings of butterflies
sunsets roses, moons and stars,
resolve around elegant tapestry
woven white doilies.
Rearrange
the synaptic fireworks ,
compose Beethoven's next symphony
study Freud's last dream.
Echo, echo....
make the new love
an urgent poem,
play it from imagination
'til realization.
echo......
into eternity.......

The innocence that remains inside of me
Darla, is what her name shall be
Running through the forest as if she were free
Wearing an old fashioned white dress with scrapes on her knees
The lightest shade of blonde hair that you ever did see
Dirt on her hands while her seat for supper remains empty

Darla, oh Darla, where might you be...
Chasing the butterflies and buzzing with the bees
Napping in the meadow is where you may find thee
Dreaming of Darla, she and I are dancing
Away with each other, where I wish I could be her and she wishes she were me.

Here I stand
With lips too clumsy to make sounds that create words,
that form sentences
that ask questions
like, "Would you like to grab a cup of coffee?"
So I stand
And silently offer you this box of conversation hearts.
Not because I think you have bad taste in candy,
but because I think you're pretty great
and I'm hoping that the rattle of the candy inside my box
can translate these words imprisoned in my head into ones
that are easily read
in small print
on tiny hearts
that we hold in our palms
and carry to our mouths
and swallow the way I swallow my words.
Cause if I set them free they may fly around your head
like butterflies made of lace and lead
like a little girl trying on her mother's high heeled shoes.
Awkward
Unsteady
I must look that way to you.
So I'm gonna smile and stand
With my candy in my hand
and hope that these hearts can break the ice.
I'm not asking for the rest of your life.
Just tonight.
The rest of the weekend might be nice.

Be it from happiness or depression
From butterflies in your stomach
Or from secret frustrations
From your sanity intact
Or from your dark hallucinations
From your broken heart
Or from fresh or healing wrist wound
From love letters you write
Or journeys to the moon

Continue your poems
Let it be the ink of hope
Let everything, good or bad, be your inspiration
To write one more poem tomorrow
To look forward to tomorrow

Just keep on writing
Keep on rhyming
Continue your poetry

My recurring dreams typically involve myself running in slow motion
being chased by butterflies
their wingspan as wide as the atlas mom stores on top of filing cabinets
on the section labeled, “General References”.
Those humongous creatures with their sinister looks
protruding eyes as if breathing a life of their own,
their wings containing poison powder
a speck proven to be fatal.

Sometimes my dreams involve myself hanged upside down
being pecked to death by crows
those hungry devils feasting over my flesh
my innards slipping into their mouth like spaghetti
some of them even sharing a strand like that classic scene
in Lady and the *****
never in my life have I seen such a lovely spectacle
caressing feathers, rubbing beaks, sharing warmth
So lovely I could have written a fairy tale out of it
except that, of course, they’re crows.

I have deactivated my nocturnal juices
allowing every monster under the bed to trespass my innermost thoughts
Clawing their way out of the depths to take form
in all sizes and shapes
screeching for attention, strangling, suffocating,
“My body is not yours to own”, I protested.
Led me to the edge of the cliff, those devils
Pushed me into the abyss, nothing to hold on to
called out for help, somebody save me.

Woke up screaming, rushed to the kitchen
emptied the bottle of melatonin
those **** pills, minions of menace.
I don’t want to sleep anymore.
Keep me awake. Keep me awake.

-

After work we meet for a drink
I’m as nervous as I can be
I want so badly to kiss her
She was right there across from me

Tonight was the very first time
And all I could do was stare
When she spoke, I heard sweet music
Like love songs flew through the air

Here in the booth of this crowded bar
One or two drinks break the ice
I'm wanting so badly to kiss him
I'll bet it would feel really nice

Rock n roll blasting behind me
Lights turned down low, very dim
I'm hoping they'll play something slow soon
So that I can dance slowly with him

I should just lean over and kiss her
But what if she gets upset
I don’t want to ruin the evening
That I would truly regret

Finally a slow song is playing
This might be my only chance
I reach for her hand and I take it
Then ask her “Would you like to dance?”

My heart starts to race at his touch
I let myself get carried away
I follow him onto the dance floor
Where our bodies so close start to sway

His arms hold me tightly close to him
My arms hold him just the same
I feel his lips brush past my ear
Then his voice softly whisper my name

Her fragrance is so mesmerizing
Her touch makes my smile ignite
Dancing with her on this evening
Oh what a beautiful night

The feel of her arms wrapped around me
As we move slow across the floor
I sing to her now as we’re dancing
You are the one I adore

I think I am falling in love
I can't think what else this could be
Butterflies inside my belly
My knees start to feel very weak

My eyes meet his for a moment
When he stopped for a moment to look
Now I'm lost in his eyes forever
That moment is all that it took

So many months we’ve been talking
Now finally we get to meet
I’m holding the girl of my dreams in my arms
I feel my heart skipping a beat

My heart is now beating much faster
Never knew it’d feel something like this
I’m in love with this beautiful woman
A dream that I still haven’t kissed

We both want this moment to happen
Up onto my toes I lift for a kiss
His lips open up to meet me
Finally knowing all I had missed

My lips part a little bit more
His mouth covers mine with his
I feel his tongue brushing mine
Never has it felt good as this

I must have landed in heaven
Her lips feel so soft and divine
Now feeling like we are both flying
I can not believe she is mine

We’re soaring high over the dance floor
We spin in the breezes above
That’s just how this moment is feeling
As head over heels I’m in love

Now what of you
from a place in my memory
from a memory in the past
from the past I barely remember
anymore

Is there
any more you will be to me
than a phone number I cannot call
than a photograph in my computer screen
than a newspaper article I've read and reread again and
again

Are you more of a loss or
a gain- like the profit from falling for love
and the debt from falling apart
in love
and all its constituents from
butterflies to monsters
to daydreams to tear drops to
fireworks

Because this want works like
fire works
to burn then burn out
but never like the fire in your eyes
of passion and compassion
that builds fire then stays
burning up
unless in exchange of more
match sticks you have for
today

Will you forever be a thought from night
to day
from all the merriment I encounter
to all the melancholy after
a thought I'll remember
more striking than a bad news typed in
boldface

This might be like all the others where I put on a
bold face
to pick up one by one
the torn pieces of hope I set up way too high
but not to fix any part of my heart
fully secured
from similar events from before
tick tock tick tock
there, like time, like them, off you go

Off you go

In the moment that I knew,
I had fallen for you,
I could feel the butterflies churning,
As my stomach started turning.
In the moment that I felt,
My heart begin to melt,
I knew I had no control,
That I felt it deep in my soul.
In the moment that I could see,
How much you meant to me,
I was lost for so long,
That because of you I feel strong.
In the moment that I knew,
My heart belonged to you,
Just please keep it safe, don't let it break,
The pain is too much to take.
In the moment that you stole my heart,
Yours was still torn apart,
That for so long I kept my distance,
And I'm here if you ever want to give us a chance.

There's a poem about you that's waiting to be written
There are words that circle your lips
Falling, slipping, spilling from my fingertips
Into late night confusion and moments of nothingness
You're a page in the center of a book with a prologue that I haven't read
But I'm still imagining the way the ink stained paragraphs would lend themselves to film
Because every story can be told through so many mediums
There's a poem about you that is waiting for the right words
I wouldn't call it attraction
I would call it an admission that having you at my side is oddly comfortable
I would call it a confession that I wanted to reach for your hand a few times
I wouldn't call it more
I haven't been lost in the starlight of your eyes
I haven't scattered butterflies from my chest
I haven't longed for lipstick stains and inside jokes, sharing, and falling apart to rebuild each other, listening, loving, forgetting the past
I don't think you and I are a would be could be should be
But I do think that you deserve something different and that I want to be someone new
Funny how those match
I think that even though you haven't sparked music in my soul
You have poems about you that are waiting to come to light
Because you have ink in your veins to tattoo words on your bones
And you're a table of contents out of context pointing to a chapter left untitled
You're a hardcover book, but not one to bother with the slipcovers
And you've got a spine that's been bent but is not easily broken
You're a story I want to read, not one I'd want to live
But I do want to write poetry about you
Because you're spilled ink that might as well be a Rorschach test
You're paper pages that act like kindling
You're words that shy away from being spoken
Or written
And there's poetry floating through the air that is sure to rest on your shoulders
Because I'm sure that your heart is shelter to thousands of words left unspoken
And your pulse is sewing together the phrases that you never said
But I'll never really know why my hands warmed up at the touch of yours
Because some poems just aren't meant to be written by me
But they're still out there waiting for you

I got dizzy sick rolling down hills in the mist
In the heart of a city desperate to exist
I understood that longing gaze of the abyss
An endless summer, well, when will it quit?

A stitch in time between two uneven seams
A finger in the socket of Tesla's dead dream
Come dance in the current of electric memes
Talk me out of my money with sweet polysemes

Dawn's hair was a sunbeam, she dyed it fire
It wouldn't fall straight, time is a spire
Out of sync with fate and strung like a lyre
She was an apex of innocence and desire

She left with a preacher all doom and gloom
I came with a stripper in a darkened black room
She said I'm a good kisser, I assume it's true
You can laugh at me if you want to

This dancer's a waterfall, turning all slowly
Trying to show me how intimacy's lonely
Piercings on her back like the ones Anna showed me
Lost time swirling in whirlpools below me

I tried to be gentle but I just turned out weak
Cursed by my angels, Hope and Release
My mediocre mind, my consistent hobgoblin
She said "Don't fall in love," that won't be a problem

Haylee got angry at the skip in each heartbeat
Anxiety burning in every breath of our sleep
She held every moment of the life I never had
Then released them like butterflies in our confab

My tongue tied, un-nimble, into infinity symbols
Swirling in the kiss of strangers so simple
Peeking thru needle's eyes into heaven's riddle
Wound up with Thumbelina living in a thimble

Tumbling down a faucet stream, twisting with ripples
Her hair caught in my mouth, it tickles a little
Her eyes scream with thoughts of playing my fiddle
But I feel the life released from my middle

My heartbeat's compulsive, my shivers convulsive
Her tatoo at an angle, her complexion olive
I called it a nice moment but I hope it lasts
A thousand memories trapped in my gasp

A thousand nows
just
out
of
my
grasp

please be strong the summer breeze
breathe green into my wilting
leaves
my tulip kiss
my sunflower rush
bring bees once more
make butterflies dance again
tame the sun drench with tears
her lifeless form
alone in the dirt
alive her garden refresh
the grass
to stand then bow at
her resurrection
make whole the best
of nature's creations
or blight me then
in deference

As an infant there was always more tears than laughter and despondent empty eyes from people who were supposed to look at me with eyes full of future and love. The first thing babies automatically know how to do regularly is not smile or laugh, but cry.  
I'm not sure if we all cried for our sins in our past lives or for the ambiguity of the life we were entering.

There were empty rooms in that house, too many for me to count. It always smelled like coffee in the mornings and we made shadow puppets on the walls, he taught me how to make butterflies with my hands before I knew how to love.

Maybe the shadows were made out of needles instead of hands.

Our first best friends are rarely the ones we see beside us on our graduation day or cheering us on at the altar. The ones who kissed our skinned knees with such innocence when our parents weren't around during our first year of school are not the ones that kiss our bruised hearts and broken minds when we lose our stability later in life when nobody is around.

I remember your eyes.

It wasn't the ocean, it was a knock off. It was the most beautiful piece of something cheap compared to a million dollars of crystalized beauty, maybe you saw that thing you love(d) so dearly within it and that's why we went there so much, but it will always be framed inside of my mind. You left the car when I looked at the trailer trash sea from the back seat like it was the most golden beach. The sunset reflected the pulse from the bodies that would be close to mine later in life. I've never felt a sunset like I did on that day. The highway was a different shade of gray on the ride home. I haven't seen that color since.

The first insults feel like bullet holes and sound like nails on a chalk board. You learn with age that you are only what you see yourself as, you are not these combinations of letters and sounds and syllables used to make yourself turn against yourself.

I remember the light on the front porch and the way the air felt. I remember the way I barely saw your face and the way your voice cracked. I remember I kept my body in the warmth and my head outside in the cold where your entire body was, and maybe that's why my head hasn't been right ever since. I remember feeling something sad and not understand why and realizing almost every day since then that goodbye's can be forever and not just see you later's.

We will throw our caps in the air, and there will be a barrier with many cracks in it between me and what once was. There will be an open road with forevers laced like a dotted line straight down the middle in front of me and I will scream goodbye to the sound of my favorite songs,
and I'm sorry, but I don't know how long I'll be gone.

People have told me
For every year since I could talk,
That when you find THE ONE,
You'll forget your own name.

But if I forget how to talk,
How can you help me sing?
If I forget how to breathe,
How can I laugh?

If my heart skips a beat,
Will you make sure it doesn't **** me?
If the butterflies get too out of hand,
Will you be there to get rid of them?

If my voice shakes,
Usually, I'm scared.
If I'm shyer around you than without,
You're probably not THE ONE for me.

I need my heart to stay steady,
And butterflies in my stomach make me nauseous.
Lucky for me,
I have someone who will sit with me until fear leaves.

Someone who will stand and watch changing fall colors,
Or debate about the more beautiful sunset,
Someone who listens and responds,
Even when I think I'm too quiet.

I have someone who I can tease,
Someone who teases me back.
I have someone who makes me laugh
Instead of taking my breath away.

I have someone who lifts me up,
And I'd trade that for THE ONE any day.