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"blurr" poems
Sleep made her eyes droop Tears made her eyes blurr Stress made her reactions slow Love made her heart heavy Rain made the road slick The crash made her life change
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Mar 7, 2010
Mar 7, 2010 at 12:00 PM UTC
Accident
the carousel played in the carnival park bright music to lure tinkling lights in the dark spirited ponies, animals quaint all snorting and rearing colored with paint the spinning floor stops for us to get on we choose our mounts it starts with a song up and down go the horses the calliope sings as we go 'round we reach out for the rings sometimes we miss them they go on by but there's always a chance for the second try the turning seasons so very like life you get your good job your husband or wife your car and your boat your kids and their stuff you go 'round and 'round but you can't get enough! then all of a sudden death cuts like a knife and you discover you've wasted your life the scenery, the colors just a smear. just a blurr the music passed by your heart was not stirred! you didn't smell seabreeze feel the wind in your face you didn't seek God missed out on His GRACE LIFE IS THE JOURNEY but you forgot you passed up the beauty without a thought LIFE ISN'T ALL GOLD it don't mean a thing so reach for the Rose as well as the RING reach out for GOD He's important as well when you take your ride on the bright CAROUSEL SoulSurvivor (C) 12/15/2015 c
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Dec 15, 2015
Dec 15, 2015 at 12:08 AM UTC
carousel
For the seven lakes, and by no man these verses: Rain; empty river; a voyage, Fire from frozen cloud, heavy rain in the twilight Under the cabin roof was one lantern. The reeds are heavy; bent; and the bamboos speak as if weeping. Autumn moon; hills rise about lakes against sunset Evening is like a curtain of cloud, a blurr above ripples; and through it sharp long spikes of the cinnamon, a cold tune amid reeds. Behind hill the monk’s bell borne on the wind. Sail passed here in April; may return in October Boat fades in silver; slowly; Sun blaze alone on the river. Where wine flag catches the sunset Sparse chimneys smoke in the cross light Comes then snow scur on the river And a world is covered with jade Small boat floats like a lanthorn, The flowing water closts as with cold. And at San Yin they are a people of leisure. Wild geese swoop to the ******* Clouds gather about the hole of the window Broad water; geese line out with the autumn Rooks clatter over the fishermen’s lanthorns, A light moves on the north sky line; where the young boys **** stones for shrimp. In seventeen hundred came Tsing to these hill lakes. A light moves on the South sky line. State by creating riches shd. thereby get into debt? Thsi is infamy; this is Geryon. This canal goes still to TenShi Though the old king built it for pleasure K E I M E N R A N K E I K I U M A N M A N K E I JITSU GETSU K O K W A T A N FUKU T A N K A I Sun up; work sundown; to rest dig well and drink of the water dig field; eat of the grain Imperial power is? and to us what is it? The fourth; the dimension of stillness. And the power over wild beasts.
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2.6k
Canto 49
For the seven lakes, and by no man these verses: Rain; empty river; a voyage, Fire from frozen cloud, heavy rain in the twilight Under the cabin roof was one lantern. The reeds are heavy; bent; and the bamboos speak as if weeping. Autumn moon; hills rise about lakes against sunset Evening is like a curtain of cloud, a blurr above ripples; and through it sharp long spikes of the cinnamon, a cold tune amid reeds. Behind hill the monk’s bell borne on the wind. Sail passed here in April; may return in October Boat fades in silver; slowly; Sun blaze alone on the river. Where wine flag catches the sunset Sparse chimneys smoke in the cross light Comes then snow scur on the river And a world is covered with jade Small boat floats like a lanthorn, The flowing water closts as with cold. And at San Yin they are a people of leisure. Wild geese swoop to the ******* Clouds gather about the hole of the window Broad water; geese line out with the autumn Rooks clatter over the fishermen’s lanthorns, A light moves on the north sky line; where the young boys **** stones for shrimp. In seventeen hundred came Tsing to these hill lakes. A light moves on the South sky line. State by creating riches shd. thereby get into debt? Thsi is infamy; this is Geryon. This canal goes still to TenShi Though the old king built it for pleasure K E I M E N R A N K E I K I U M A N M A N K E I JITSU GETSU K O K W A T A N FUKU T A N K A I Sun up; work sundown; to rest dig well and drink of the water dig field; eat of the grain Imperial power is? and to us what is it? The fourth; the dimension of stillness. And the power over wild beasts.
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47
Whenever they ask me "What Happened" I just look at them and say "It's complicated" I thought it was going so well then all of the sudden, We go back to strangers; as if we never dated, It started off as a simple game I never planned to make you mine, I never thought you'd feel the same, We just started talking; from exchanging half gearted insults to cheesy pickup lines, The thought of us being "more than friends" seemed so sureal, So I honestly didn't know how to feel, Until I finally gathered enough courage to ask you, If you felt the same way about me too, After your "yes", the happiness was basically all a blurr But Like they say, love barely lasts forever, I started to have second thoughts about us being together, I lost motivation, Even to reply to your simplest questions, I didnt keep up a conversation, I took you for granted, Barely gave you things you wanted, Yet somehow I still hate how we ended, Countless nights contemplating my mistakes, Countless attenpts to forget you for every shot I take, Drinking away all the things I did wrong, Reminiscing from a stupid love song, Maybe it is true, That I probably didn't deserve you, I can't believe how fast you found someone new, It kills me to think about my biggest regret; Letting go of a girl I can never forget
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Mar 20, 2014
Mar 20, 2014 at 11:38 PM UTC
Regrets
WHAT A WONDERFUL LITTLE BOY The view gazes at him. The landscape gathers itself about him as if he were a piece of pigment in a painting a blob or blurr of blue or green or something in between. "What a wonderful little boy!" a passing cloud, pauses...muses and says once more in case the hill hadn't heard. "What a wonderful little boy indeed!" a tree agrees...winking...its leaves. A river runs through him alive in his senses. The grass runs all over the field tickling his naked toes. Sunlight throws itself at his feet bows before him in all its glory. A breeze throws his hat high up in the sky and returns it to his hand as if by command. The clouds grazing now upon a hill top fascinated by his presence how he has come to be. "He makes us feel so very much alive!" One cloud nods to another. "Oh, there's a poet in him to be sure to be sure!" the river remarks its voice clamouring over stones. Time that sheep dog barks but the clouds only luahg "See how he lends us his voice in order that we may think and speak. Look I'm talking in human words." "Ballea...Ballea...Ballea!" the farm shouts its name. Again and again and again the river exclaims "Owenabui...Owenabui...Owenabui!" sunlight dancing in its voice. A bird stands stock still upon the air neither coming or going just standing on nothing as if it were a punctuation mark typed upon the sky. Time returns now in policeman mood. "Move along now...nothing to see here move along now!" And the landscape loses a voice the sky its ability to see the cloud has no words the bird become a dot only the sunset whispers to an horizon "What a wonderful wonderful little boy!"
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Oct 3, 2018
Oct 3, 2018 at 6:49 AM UTC
WHAT A WONDERFUL LITTLE BOY
WHAT A WONDERFUL LITTLE BOY The view gazes at him. The landscape gathers itself about him as if he were a piece of pigment in a painting a blob or blurr of blue or green or something in between. "What a wonderful little boy!" a passing cloud, pauses...muses and says once more in case the hill hadn't heard. "What a wonderful little boy indeed!" a tree agrees...winking...its leaves. A river runs through him alive in his senses. The grass runs all over the field tickling his naked toes. Sunlight throws itself at his feet bows before him in all its glory. A breeze throws his hat high up in the sky and returns it to his hand as if by command. The clouds grazing now upon a hill top fascinated by his presence how he has come to be. "He makes us feel so very much alive!" One cloud nods to another. "Oh, there's a poet in him to be sure to be sure!" the river remarks its voice clamouring over stones. Time that sheep dog barks but the clouds only luahg "See how he lends us his voice in order that we may think and speak. Look I'm talking in human words." "Ballea...Ballea...Ballea!" the farm shouts its name. Again and again and again the river exclaims "Owenabui...Owenabui...Owenabui!" sunlight dancing in its voice. A bird stands stock still upon the air neither coming or going just standing on nothing as if it were a punctuation mark typed upon the sky. Time returns now in policeman mood. "Move along now...nothing to see here move along now!" And the landscape loses a voice the sky its ability to see the cloud has no words the bird become a dot only the sunset whispers to an horizon "What a wonderful wonderful little boy!"
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71
Since I met you here, dear friend I began to like this place a lot at first sight it was eerie here and the ground for me too hot As I continued walking upon untrodden paths rotten fruit surrounding me no bees or birds are singing I wonder walking all alone no sign of a living soul all green softness disappeared, and everywhere was stone Wondering all the time, no shame I found a clear chrystal ditch at last if you will ask about the name is that the present or in the past? My head turning, my feet burning they are to blurr my view great bliss that pure water and some dew wish that shall change my head from spinning Then walking all the while with the same view I see from far a green stip slowly coming in seventh heaven am I, since it's a human being I thank Thee on my naked knees, it is you my friend I notice beauty yonder the mockingbird and wren have a duet together I wonder since when After I've met you, friend I like this place a lot it's not so eerie anymore and God's blessings are on this spot © Sylvia Frances Chan       27th April 2013
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Apr 27, 2013
Apr 27, 2013 at 9:56 AM UTC
Since I met you...
Behold the man who terrfies with power, Behold the man who can **** a king with his glower. All hail the man who has it all, All hail the man who cannot fall. Woe to the man who fears judgement day, He paces and turns the clock off in fear driven rage. Woe to the man who hides his pills from the other "eyes", He sits vengeful at his past, masking it with every lie. Woe to the man who doesn't sleep at night, For he regrets selling is soul, he doesn't sleep in fright. Woe to the men who are evil, for deep down they do not know, Their sickness has overcome them, they aren't aware they are suffering, barely able to crawl. Behold the one who sees it all, It is I, the lowly, the injured, the small. Behold the one with the love for the wolves when the world does not, I love what the world only wishes to die and rot. The evil are not born evil, some this truth is no option, For many, "Go to hell, you deserve no love, you are just a toxcin." I have grown to love what you consider "wicked", Despite my life, I am the victim. I can only love and forgive, no hatred after all these years, I still pray for them, behind my bruises, scars and tears. We could both debate, argue and try to pursuade, but I care too much, I will not lie behind hate. Perhaps a weakness, call me pathetic, but I was sent to heal the broken, Even if it makes me just as sick. Without a cure, how can we heal? Without a heaven, there is only hell. I fear the day when I am free, I fear the day this chord is broken, Killing them from me. What will be left is me the murderer, Me to mourn their decay; And what will be left is just a dream, a blurr. A pain I cannot bare to think it, I cannot stomach that, not even for a bit. So, woe and behold, The evil, the sick, Whom society and the mind is their virus, A good soul their antibiotic.
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Oct 26, 2017
Oct 26, 2017 at 6:25 AM UTC
Woe and Behold
Behold the man who terrfies with power, Behold the man who can **** a king with his glower. All hail the man who has it all, All hail the man who cannot fall. Woe to the man who fears judgement day, He paces and turns the clock off in fear driven rage. Woe to the man who hides his pills from the other "eyes", He sits vengeful at his past, masking it with every lie. Woe to the man who doesn't sleep at night, For he regrets selling is soul, he doesn't sleep in fright. Woe to the men who are evil, for deep down they do not know, Their sickness has overcome them, they aren't aware they are suffering, barely able to crawl. Behold the one who sees it all, It is I, the lowly, the injured, the small. Behold the one with the love for the wolves when the world does not, I love what the world only wishes to die and rot. The evil are not born evil, some this truth is no option, For many, "Go to hell, you deserve no love, you are just a toxcin." I have grown to love what you consider "wicked", Despite my life, I am the victim. I can only love and forgive, no hatred after all these years, I still pray for them, behind my bruises, scars and tears. We could both debate, argue and try to pursuade, but I care too much, I will not lie behind hate. Perhaps a weakness, call me pathetic, but I was sent to heal the broken, Even if it makes me just as sick. Without a cure, how can we heal? Without a heaven, there is only hell. I fear the day when I am free, I fear the day this chord is broken, Killing them from me. What will be left is me the murderer, Me to mourn their decay; And what will be left is just a dream, a blurr. A pain I cannot bare to think it, I cannot stomach that, not even for a bit. So, woe and behold, The evil, the sick, Whom society and the mind is their virus, A good soul their antibiotic.
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40
I travel trough the heavy rain I sit lonesome on a lonely train I play blues These days are grey,  these nights  are blue my mind keeps coming back to you I play the blues I travel with desire Past houses lit on fire I play jazz Windows lit by sundown My train-seat old and rundown I play jazz Rainbow roads in colored blurr Pretty little towns I'm sure I play swing Past mirror waves and open sky My stomach tingles, wonder why I Play swing ***** feet on ***** train Skin so white I see my veins I play punk Impatient taps and flickering lights Soon the day will turn to night I play punk Head in the clouds, mind at ease Longing for the morning breeze I play Pink Floyd Memories hanging from branches Passengers sharing brief glances I play Pink Floyd I'm coming home, I'm on my way, but I travel still... I travel not by force... yet not by will Music of choise as soundtrack to the silent film beyond the windowsill
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May 30, 2017
May 30, 2017 at 9:56 AM UTC
Train ride to nowhere
tears fall like daggers my skin- dry and ripped; the sweat drips differently and the blood flow slows. patience and positivity keeps the wheels turning, but there is a breaking point on the horizon. soon i will stand up to depression, but for now, i sit and wait.
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Mar 13, 2019
Mar 13, 2019 at 12:23 PM UTC
blurr
Spinning and spinning Six little circles Flushing a life down the drain Naught but a smidgen of straining, my pidgeon, A blurr to the vision, euphoric, no pain     My brain, Will just shut down I’ll get Out of this town The rain Gonna pour down and wash me away Whirling and twirling My heart in the middle Graphing the pathway to get the right spin Crisp calculation, the subtle equation Causing elation, at last cashing-in Your brain, Will just shut down You'll get Out of this town The rain Gonna pour down and wash you away    You must be THIS tall to ride this ride It’s your human RIGHT to a nice      suicide This celestial plane, ...and all of it’s      strife We can help you jump past it, It’s YOUR ******* life! It’s all in your hands. You know what to do. Now is the time To become the late YOU Your brain Will just shut down You'll get Out of this town The rain Gonna pour down and wash you away    My paradigm’s shifting The veil is lifting What was I thinking My heart rate is sinking And something is stinking My consciousness shrinking And what is that ringing Do I hear choirs singing? - Julijonas Fancy yourself the angel-reaper? Julijonas Urbonas Aren't you your brother’s keeper? Is this just a "what-if", ...for fun? O Julijonas Julijonas Urbonas …What have you done?
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Jan 18, 2015
Jan 18, 2015 at 6:44 PM UTC
Morose Coaster
Her Diamond Mind Rests in Pure Carbon Mine Shining Fluorescence Never left her with obsolescence Light refraction Quite the distraction Ice rink on her finger A monetary stinger Gem best friend How much did he spend? Frozen Pond reflection of the hardest affection Ice rock speaks to only her Don't be a gem amateur Clear crystal quartz won't do Sir with its dim blurr Follow the four C's Scintillation gleams Cut determines its prism At first sight brings hypnotism Color - a rainbow brilliance Smiles with each glance More clarity for radiance All eyes may be romanced Be prepared for a trance Carat weight Might be the bait Year after year Continual glimmer With every light flicker
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Jan 26, 2019
Jan 26, 2019 at 3:04 PM UTC
Diamond Mind
. Light sparkles in the clover, Yellow and blurr of bees Are honeyed in the sun And robins have come, Yanking in the gasses, So green is the moisten Of the painting of the dew And all is lolling in petrichor, The soils running with slow Time so shortly experienced, Oils of wood permeate the air, Lapping brooks bream into light, The loft kestrel swirls in meadow And chipmunks scuttle at base of tree, Even the wind does freshly quiet, crisply, There as a hug waiting for body and spirit, Patches of white are disappearing, they know— That one day we must all return, after winter snows.
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Apr 25, 2017
Apr 25, 2017 at 2:40 PM UTC
Early Spring Morning
Risest thou thus, dim dawn, again, And howlest, issuing out of night, With blasts that blow the poplar white, And lash with storm the streaming pane? Day, when my crown'd estate begun To pine in that reverse of doom, Which sicken'd every living bloom, And blurr'd the splendour of the sun; Who usherest in the dolorous hour With thy quick tears that make the rose Pull sideways, and the daisy close Her crimson fringes to the shower; Who might'st have heaved a windless flame Up the deep East, or, whispering, play'd A chequer-work of beam and shade Along the hills, yet look'd the same. As wan, as chill, as wild as now; Day, mark'd as with some hideous crime, When the dark hand struck down thro' time, And cancell'd nature's best: but thou, Lift as thou may'st thy burthen'd brows Thro' clouds that drench the morning star, And whirl the ungarner'd sheaf afar, And sow the sky with flying boughs, And up thy vault with roaring sound Climb thy thick noon, disastrous day; Touch thy dull goal of joyless gray, And hide thy shame beneath the ground.
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In Memoriam A. H. H. OBIIT MDCCCXXXIII: 72
She is dressed like an unmarked bottle of tequila Smuggled and homemade There's some dirt on your cheek Leave it there Out here looks good on you There is the crunch and scrape of dirt in the threading little pebbles against my teeth I spit them out onto a smooth portion of cement Pray that in the blurr I can read divinity in the way the dirt falls Another swig and I am heart heavy Like scrap metal and old houses like fat sacks of glowing mercy She smiles like a pipedream of twisted shining copper She speaks in head spin This is what it feels like when god talks to you without killing you She says You are not in the business of feeling sorry for yourself Name the year This is the year of the shedding of weight The year of the cutting in half The year of shaking the dust From the fragile places Wiping the dirt from the threading even if you have to use your own mouth so you can finally seal yourself without worrying if it will hurt this time The year of hotmess And young love The year of leaving This is the year Not where everything is lost But a new lightness is gained In the way you can walk away So pull your heart out from the rubble of the past This is the year of being charming The year of fist fights and no regrets The year where you finally understand what it means to be honest This is the year of shaking the dust
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Nov 13, 2012
Nov 13, 2012 at 1:51 PM UTC
In The Year of Shaking the Dust
keep the window open i cant stand to smell your skin, you are shivering. youre cold (you tell me so (you want a response (i nod,))) (but you are still cold) *do you have any fantasies?* this halting voice heaves in my stomach pressing against the walls, making me sick, the snap of your blinking lids a pickaxe to my temple. *i think about fire a lot. i think about forest fires.* filling the tank in a dead town, dark night quiet town, the gas tank overflows (your nervous eyes in your sweating sticky face {your twitching gaze stroking the lighter in the glove compartment} dry dry lips {your wet tongue only makes them dryer}) breathing in her ear you say *tie me to the stake tight tight so rope burn sears my wrist, burn me with the dry kindling,* condensation drips down her neck, sliding down the arm. on the sidewalk in the pit of her shadow a puddle forms, wetting the wings of the unhappy wasps, joints twisted, the gaps in the exoskeleton show something bright, something bulbous, with forceps and needles it could be reached? its delicate skin pierced, oozing thick light (*do you have any fantasies?*) [*so there are two of me, right, clones, equivalent beings but individuals. some sort of sick government secret. human ex periments. its not important. i grab my clone by the neck or it grabs me, its not important, the dust billows when my feet skid, im choking, vision blurr ing, i claw at my hands, we f all, dust bursts into the air, m y fist makes sick thudding sou nds when it hits, bruising my knuckles on the structural bon es of my face, possibly breaki ng the more delicate ones. im straddling my chest and im s pitting out the teeth that i di dnt swallow. then the clones **** im not really sure.*]
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Oct 7, 2015
Oct 7, 2015 at 11:38 PM UTC
L.U.S.T. LUCIFER USING ****** TEMPTATIONS
keep the window open i cant stand to smell your skin, you are shivering. youre cold (you tell me so (you want a response (i nod,))) (but you are still cold) *do you have any fantasies?* this halting voice heaves in my stomach pressing against the walls, making me sick, the snap of your blinking lids a pickaxe to my temple. *i think about fire a lot. i think about forest fires.* filling the tank in a dead town, dark night quiet town, the gas tank overflows (your nervous eyes in your sweating sticky face {your twitching gaze stroking the lighter in the glove compartment} dry dry lips {your wet tongue only makes them dryer}) breathing in her ear you say *tie me to the stake tight tight so rope burn sears my wrist, burn me with the dry kindling,* condensation drips down her neck, sliding down the arm. on the sidewalk in the pit of her shadow a puddle forms, wetting the wings of the unhappy wasps, joints twisted, the gaps in the exoskeleton show something bright, something bulbous, with forceps and needles it could be reached? its delicate skin pierced, oozing thick light (*do you have any fantasies?*) [*so there are two of me, right, clones, equivalent beings but individuals. some sort of sick government secret. human ex periments. its not important. i grab my clone by the neck or it grabs me, its not important, the dust billows when my feet skid, im choking, vision blurr ing, i claw at my hands, we f all, dust bursts into the air, m y fist makes sick thudding sou nds when it hits, bruising my knuckles on the structural bon es of my face, possibly breaki ng the more delicate ones. im straddling my chest and im s pitting out the teeth that i di dnt swallow. then the clones **** im not really sure.*]
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I spoke first to her there wasn't any conversation there wasn't any blurr understanding and all that thing peaceful, easeful never worrying I realized was this wise to give response to her advice…? my man and all stayed standing tall watching us one day to fall a greatest mistake since we weren't rollin' the ball he kicked his head to our wall he was waiting till I'll fall surprisingly I grew tall not the ball nor the wall but I and my all I loved him to the brim I still love him easiest as gym I still do keep loving him since he has learned me to swim when I spoke to him it was war or peace still I filled my tea cup with such ease patiently to the brim I must admit caring for him I still do, I love it but feel great pity leaving her was my greatest woe my life in tears from head to toe she kept calling and writing to me her beautiful poetry I had greatest silence during our absence only my soliloquy I realized I had fallen in love with her poetry if you have read her you would agree with me her poetry is her everything but she became my only thing she said latest days poetry is my everything none understands except thee (Oh, how flattered I was !! In seventh heaven) Then she continued: but my love for thee is above all things beyond eternity and above my poetry (Am crying of happiness) now at last I must confess she is my most beautiful princess  I ever possessed  My Poetess.... © Sylvia Frances Chan
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Jan 15, 2016
Jan 15, 2016 at 8:29 AM UTC
I spoke to he
(((TELL ME WHY???))) Why why why Tell me why? Why you left me? Why you ignored me? With out any means Without any reasons Disappeared you why. Why why why. Tell me why? Why you broke my heart? With arrow and dart. Why why why. Tell me why? Why you came in my life? To give me pains. To bind my life in chains. Still i miss you why? Why why why. Tell me why? Why showed me blurr dream? And left me in breme. Hurt me why Why why why. Tell me why? Why you loved me? Why you promised me? Were you a fake? Tell me for GOD's sake. Blocked me why? Why why why Tell me why? Why you have stolen my heart? And now broked it into parts. Made me cry why.. Why why why. Tell me why? Why you made me sad? I feel now so bad. Otherwise I was too simple lad. Made me mad why? Why why why Tell me why? Why you are angry? Why you went off? From my life. With some little strife. Hate me by you why Why why why Tell me why? Why you have gone so far way? Do you love me please say. You will realize everything oneday. Repent and will miss me everyday. Lost we why Why why why? Tell me why? Why you told me a lie? We will live together. Will enjoy our life each other. And will play with one another. And finally you told me good bye. I don't know it why. Why why why. Just tell me why? Why u left me in grief? And became my heart's theif. Having inside pain & finding no relief. You are mine it was my belief. Untrust me you why. Why why why. Tell me please why? Why you ignored me.? Why you left me? Why? Why? Why? Please tell me why?
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Jan 24, 2016
Jan 24, 2016 at 4:08 AM UTC
TELL me WHY?
(((TELL ME WHY???))) Why why why Tell me why? Why you left me? Why you ignored me? With out any means Without any reasons Disappeared you why. Why why why. Tell me why? Why you broke my heart? With arrow and dart. Why why why. Tell me why? Why you came in my life? To give me pains. To bind my life in chains. Still i miss you why? Why why why. Tell me why? Why showed me blurr dream? And left me in breme. Hurt me why Why why why. Tell me why? Why you loved me? Why you promised me? Were you a fake? Tell me for GOD's sake. Blocked me why? Why why why Tell me why? Why you have stolen my heart? And now broked it into parts. Made me cry why.. Why why why. Tell me why? Why you made me sad? I feel now so bad. Otherwise I was too simple lad. Made me mad why? Why why why Tell me why? Why you are angry? Why you went off? From my life. With some little strife. Hate me by you why Why why why Tell me why? Why you have gone so far way? Do you love me please say. You will realize everything oneday. Repent and will miss me everyday. Lost we why Why why why? Tell me why? Why you told me a lie? We will live together. Will enjoy our life each other. And will play with one another. And finally you told me good bye. I don't know it why. Why why why. Just tell me why? Why u left me in grief? And became my heart's theif. Having inside pain & finding no relief. You are mine it was my belief. Untrust me you why. Why why why. Tell me please why? Why you ignored me.? Why you left me? Why? Why? Why? Please tell me why?
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78
I have to hold back my tears. No one can see me like this, vulnerable and not in control.  They think that i can fend for myself, what do they know? Truth is im in need for their help, for their opnion and inspiring words. For a long time it was me in the middle of the sandwhich. My older sister covering me, and i protecting my ypunger twin. Its funny how the sandwhich turns into how my life is today. My older sister takes up all the spotlight, claimig it allfor herself. Absorbin all the attention until there is none left. I shake at the words she wont utter, like a simple please or thank you. How she would never help my mother how she leaves my mother fighting so hard, as she sits on the couch and jist watches. When my mother asks for her help she will make it more like a burden then helping out of respect. I will do any of those thigs in a heart eat just to take the stress off of my moms shoulders. But again thats how we differ... As for my twin the one that i had felt the need to protect since we had been in the wound together 16 years ago. How can i put in words all the feelings she leaves on me? She is so irritable yet i yearn to watch her succeed. She is as slow as a turtle, yet sometimes shes as sharp as a knife . Some nights ill catch her talking to herself, it pains me to see her over think things. After so much effort of tryin to help her all i can do now is make beleive im sleeping, pull the covers over my head and let the tears roll down my cheek, burning it under their touch. She has this problem and the tendency to ovetthink thongs from the stipidest things to the most important. She lays them all on the same scale not considekg the dfferences betwene them . As muh as she overthinks , when she has an idea she lets it cloud her judgement.l  I remember thst one time in our cribs its blurr but i still feel it in my blood. Diane had my moms attentiom absorbed for she was alsay a cryer even when her head hutt a lottle bit. Michelle  was sick with strep having my moms also and my dads granparents. Then my head throat and whole body was killing .. All i remmeber was keeping my mouth shut. And waitig for someone to come ask me how i was feeling. Which no one did.And still as i cry typing this no one will ask me how im feeling, for i have middle child syndrome
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Sep 13, 2012
Sep 13, 2012 at 6:29 PM UTC
Family
I have to hold back my tears. No one can see me like this, vulnerable and not in control.  They think that i can fend for myself, what do they know? Truth is im in need for their help, for their opnion and inspiring words. For a long time it was me in the middle of the sandwhich. My older sister covering me, and i protecting my ypunger twin. Its funny how the sandwhich turns into how my life is today. My older sister takes up all the spotlight, claimig it allfor herself. Absorbin all the attention until there is none left. I shake at the words she wont utter, like a simple please or thank you. How she would never help my mother how she leaves my mother fighting so hard, as she sits on the couch and jist watches. When my mother asks for her help she will make it more like a burden then helping out of respect. I will do any of those thigs in a heart eat just to take the stress off of my moms shoulders. But again thats how we differ... As for my twin the one that i had felt the need to protect since we had been in the wound together 16 years ago. How can i put in words all the feelings she leaves on me? She is so irritable yet i yearn to watch her succeed. She is as slow as a turtle, yet sometimes shes as sharp as a knife . Some nights ill catch her talking to herself, it pains me to see her over think things. After so much effort of tryin to help her all i can do now is make beleive im sleeping, pull the covers over my head and let the tears roll down my cheek, burning it under their touch. She has this problem and the tendency to ovetthink thongs from the stipidest things to the most important. She lays them all on the same scale not considekg the dfferences betwene them . As muh as she overthinks , when she has an idea she lets it cloud her judgement.l  I remember thst one time in our cribs its blurr but i still feel it in my blood. Diane had my moms attentiom absorbed for she was alsay a cryer even when her head hutt a lottle bit. Michelle  was sick with strep having my moms also and my dads granparents. Then my head throat and whole body was killing .. All i remmeber was keeping my mouth shut. And waitig for someone to come ask me how i was feeling. Which no one did.And still as i cry typing this no one will ask me how im feeling, for i have middle child syndrome
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Risest thou thus, dim dawn, again, And howlest, issuing out of night, With blasts that blow the poplar white, And lash with storm the streaming pane? Day, when my crown'd estate begun To pine in that reverse of doom, Which sicken'd every living bloom, And blurr'd the splendour of the sun; Who usherest in the dolorous hour With thy quick tears that make the rose Pull sideways, and the daisy close Her crimson fringes to the shower; Who might'st have heaved a windless flame Up the deep East, or, whispering, play'd A chequer-work of beam and shade Along the hills, yet look'd the same. As wan, as chill, as wild as now; Day, mark'd as with some hideous crime, When the dark hand struck down thro' time, And cancell'd nature's best: but thou, Lift as thou may'st thy burthen'd brows Thro' clouds that drench the morning star, And whirl the ungarner'd sheaf afar, And sow the sky with flying boughs, And up thy vault with roaring sound Climb thy thick noon, disastrous day; Touch thy dull goal of joyless gray, And hide thy shame beneath the ground.
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In Memoriam A. H. H. OBIIT MDCCCXXXIII: Part 072
Take one for this Take one for that Your mind isnt in bliss Yet as flat as a mat You cant think clearly Everythings in a blurr I almost fainted nearly I thought pills were meant to work? Rush in Rush out My head is felt feeling dazed and confused As though drugs are my only muse Cant think Cant write Cant listen Cant fight Feeling like a vegetable But people dont understand Because to them They just think its all in my mind.
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Jun 29, 2015
Jun 29, 2015 at 11:55 PM UTC
Pills
My dream became my other world so real or is this fake I dreamt of many crazy things like floating in a lake i must be mads cos I dont swim and sink just like a brick my dreams are more reality than I could ever think I pinched myself so I could see the difference from the two but would I really tell apart the dreaming from the truth time will tell when one does wain and all becomes a blurr the dreaming and reality ..I concur
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Feb 12, 2011
Feb 12, 2011 at 9:41 PM UTC
concur
With scratches on her arm Knife mark on neck that harm She got tired and went to the farm Where she used to reduce her souls warm She gave time to a second thought That enough of this pain, it's overwrought, How much she has to tackle , not snot She will heal the scratches, she got Nature started raining in farm heavenly She understood, god is with her, supportively With million of pain she smiled , screamingly Her time will also come, hopefully She covered her body scratches, Went out of the farm patches, The moon gave it's shine batches She slept on the stool having latches The sun smiled gloomingly on her She waked with desire with no blurr She went into the farm and lastly infer She want happiness and peace, err.. Her scratches reminded her the foes This time she ain't cried but laughter goes Her pain reminded her the wrong does This spot she didn't regret but learned lows The girl Started her life again And demanded only gains Scratches has Heal The girl got Wheel
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Mar 8, 2017
Mar 8, 2017 at 6:12 AM UTC
A girl with scratches
I'm not sure who I am yet, I'm sure where I'm going, I don't know if I'll ever be, Really truly me, We spend our time inventing ourselves, And i guess I'm just spare parts, The way my mind thinks, Music is my art, A titles half the story, A picture worth a thousand words, I've spent my life regretting, And feeling no self worth, I've gotten sick and tired, Of being sick and tired, I've felt the way we all we feel, At 3am alone. I've started to stay on the internet, Into wee hours of the morning, Gathering scattered information. I see my week, A flashing blurr of distorted colors, Emotions whirling everywhere, Trailing one another, I'm not sure where I'm going, Or if you'll follow me, I'm not sure of my roots, If I was planted like a tree, I haven't spent much time, Inventing myself, Not as much as wishing I was someone else, But it is time to own up to, The real and true me, And maybe then I'll understand.... Who I'm supposed to be
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Oct 8, 2016
Oct 8, 2016 at 2:41 AM UTC
i'm ready to be me
Each passing time my will to create with words depart from my impulse, The drive and want and passion lost by crippled sense of inner flames. Do you see the dreams blurr the skies of blue to grey, As crimson and hues of purple interplay in the celestrial plain. From the time of land parted from the skies zenith ago And further more the time garden of Eden let Lilith go! It's a place of Queens and Kings with wings, while ladies and maiden play among the swings. With stone and lands with rocks shaped into castle, All those creation crumbled to dust to ashes blown by the wind. Such illustration created by sleeping illusion eludes interpretation, As time elapse our minds will shut to collaspe with no variables. As the strand of hair turn black to white with forgotten songs, One can lose all of their imagination and can only surrender to sleep.
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Aug 3, 2015
Aug 3, 2015 at 11:06 PM UTC
Losing imagination and surrender to dreams!
Invocation flowed by divination on the splat of paints, As the hand move eradically, painting blurr dramatically! Compelled by the vocal expression, with reinforced connotation. Singing with such provocative verbalism with moving utterance! With drop of paint splash of articulation, with inner confession! Fingers post, flow with curves like storm erupting with Passion! He can't stop, he will not stop, as ye move relentlessly like erratic feline. Go forth with his art like a roar of thunder shaking root and foundation! As he gasps and collapses, to his final demise with the finale!
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Oct 30, 2015
Oct 30, 2015 at 10:31 PM UTC
Blood upon the splat of his finger tip