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Amoy Apr 2019
gravitational pull
falling debris
water escaping sand
it loosens at my feet, it's only an illusion
slowly I sink wondering when will I float
darkcloud Mar 2019
tears fall like daggers
my skin- dry and ripped;
the sweat drips differently
and the blood flow slows.
patience and positivity keeps the wheels turning,
but there is a breaking point on the horizon.
soon i will stand up to depression,
but for now,
i sit and wait.
going through a couple things and i want to get my message across through poems. to those who are struggling, i hope to reach out to you through my work. enjoy.
Nikki No Love Feb 2019
Growing up is finding out the real world is cruel
Growing up is finding out what you once knew isn't real
Growing up is realizing a movie or fairy tail
Growing up is learning to hurt, and learning to fail.

Growing up is truly learning how to fake a smile
Growing up is finding out your grandfather is a *******
Growing up is finding out your family hates you for something you cannot control
Growing up is going to the mines so you can support your hateful family by mining coal

Growing up is coming to terms with death
Growing up is learning your mother does ****
Growing up is realizing your father is abusive
Growing up is forever being inconclusive

Growing up is pain
Growing up is hate
Growing up is raze
Grown-up is a four letter word.
For anyone who follows me regularly I apologize for being gone so long, I just wasn't as inspired to write. Also, I am not really back, I'm sorry if you really like my work, but I'm just not as inspired as I was. But thank you so much for enjoying my work and I hope you like this one
ThatBrokenOne Dec 2018
It is as if there is no life at all
It is as if it is here just to be nothing
It is as if it does just exist to hurt
It is as if it knows your weaknesses

But one day it will be okay
But one day you will see the best of life
But one day it won't hurt anymore
But one day life will give you what you need

Just hold on a little while longer
Just don't give up yet
Just try to keep going
Just flip that page in your book of life

Do I want to keep going?
Do I want to find out what else life has to offer?
Do I want to keep pretending every thing is okay?
Do I want to fake my life?

When life feels this bad
When life makes me feel dead
When life is not great
When life feels so hollow
Emma Highlander Nov 2018
There is no more painful love
than unrequited love
A heart that is open
pouring out to another
but an empty space
like a vacuum
with nothing in return

Like giving a gift
‘Tis better to give than receive
And the heart offers freely
all of its wonderful presents

Free of expectations
when truly filled with love
It blindly releases itself to another
With a simple creed
‘I am for you’

Like the wall of a dam
suddenly letting go
A deluge of emotions
Thoughtful, interest, caring, warmth, love
A flowing waterfall
of Niagara proportions

However, without intention

which goes without saying
since the truer the love
the blinder it be

The vacated space
creates a sudden vacuum
A sharp, deep pit left
where once all of itself was housed

For a brief time
the heart is unaware
still glowing in the warmth
from the happiness and joy
of the love it gives

But slowly the glow fades
And the presence of the empty space
becomes more obvious
and apparent

A coldness sets in
An addict looking for a fix
The heart desperately seeks
in return what it has given

Never intending to give with strings
but so it finds itself
now tied to another
with the strongest of bonds

The intense fulfilling feeling
once experienced
Replaced with anguish,
longing, loneliness and pain

The mind and heart begin
an epic civil war
Feeling the torment
and seeing the destruction
the mind invokes all its resources
to break the bonds
the heart has created

But with hope that is
almost sad and pitiful
the heart refuses to let go
So sure of the ties it made
And fighting back with all
of its might to defeat
any attempt
the mind has
to remove the bonds of love

A man at war with himself
will find himself at war with others
And so, the inner conflict
resonates outwardly
displayed aptly with defiance
and destruction

Like a pebble in a pond
each action creates ripples
Slowly at first
but then with exponential speed
a life is destroyed
leaving only a broken
and beaten shell

And after all the destruction
and loss
All of the pain and suffering
The tears and sorrow
At this moment
standing on a pile
of nothing but debris
The mind,
with a sense of arrogance
and certainty,
confronts the heart
and pointedly asks,
“Do you see now?!
Do you see the
error of your ways??
Look what it has cost us!
Do you see the
mistake you’ve made?!”

Without hesitation or waiver
the heart responds
with a steady certainty
that is calm and cool in nature,
“No. Love is a risky venture.
One always, ‘takes a chance at love’.
But I will not admit
fault for trying.
When I love
I love freely and openly
I offer all of myself
without expectations
It’s only when you get involved
and create conflict within
that we have problems
To love is to love
It brings joy and happiness within itself
If it is not returned
then it is not returned
but an open and loving heart
can not feel emptiness and pain for it is filled with love
And there is no greater reward
than finding that love in another
and having another
find that love
in you
Life *****, Because there is to much Unrequited love
Nikki No Love Jul 2018

False with identity,
I am the enemy,
The false human,
The imitation alien,
A curse upon our sweet Terra,
A false partner under Herra.

I am unlike the rest,
I am a fake,
I do not matter,
And I shall fade.
This is how I feel a lot. I hope it helps someone, maybe..
Aa Harvey Apr 2018

You have no ******* idea,
What it's like to be me.
You simply couldn't comprehend,
That this is the way things have to be.
Every day feeling more pain,
The pains getting worse, it gets no better.
Every day is now the same
And it will be this way forever.

No regrets due to no memory,
Except the things that scarred our lives.
No new life can there be for you and me.
I overdose nearly every night;
But they keep keeping me alive,
And for what?  I just don't know.
Just to continue this daily punishment;
I'm still alive, so on with the show.

I'm walking through the town,
Careful to never make eye contact.
Never being recognized by anyone
And I'm never coming back.
I hate everyone in here
And I hate every stranger I meet.
I hate everyone I left behind
And I hate anyone who knows me.

I have to make small talk,
Whilst they have nothing left to say.
Their deepest conversation is about makeup
And who they ****** last Saturday.
They’re lucky they'll never feel this;
This bitter hatred in my soul.
If they walked only one day in my shoes,
They would pack up shop and they would go;
To wherever the journey ends.
Maybe the fiery pits of Mordor
And they would jump like angelic lemmings,
Just to end this life; this bore.

You meet a beautiful girl,
But you can't go up and speak to her;
Because your heart has been torn from your chest before.
You've now become a beautiful bore.

You fancy them all, yet you don't want any of them.
You could love them all, but you can't take the risk again.
So you throw in the towel
And become a celibate monk in a monastery.
Now you can't get hurt anymore;
No ******* woman can ever harm me!

But you'll never find love,
Get married and have children;
But you’re resigned to a life of struggle,
And you wouldn't want them anyway.

What?  Have a kid grow up to be just like his father.
The guy who doesn't know his family,
Has no job, but loves his baby’s momma.
The woman he'd die for is just using him for cash;
Because the kids real father, has gone and packed his bags.

She's in the last chance saloon,
Because she can't afford a kid;
But this must be her lucky day,
Because she's going out with Stupid.

So come on now boys and girls,
Please slit my throat as I sleep;
Because tomorrow is just another day
And believe me, you don't know me.

The man you used to know,
Died a long, long time ago.
Now the heart is dead inside,
But the body still moves on.

His girl has ripped his heart out,
After selling his soul.
He was convinced she was his girl,
But she's just another '**.

His brain is in pieces, his energy gone.
He no longer has faith
And he will no longer fight on.

He finds happiness in depression,
It's always been this way for him.
It's all ****** up, his life is chaos;
This is normal life for me.
But if everything’s alright for him
And the world and he spin as one,
He packs his bags and darts through the exit;
Heading back to the norm.

Chaos and pain and tragedy and suffering;
These are a few of my favorite things.
Peace, love, friends and family;
No longer mean anything to me.

I crave for nothing,
So there's nothing I need.
I don't require any of the products sold on T.V.
I don't need a wife and a kid, or a million pounds.
I'm happy alive in a world of nothing;
It's the other people who bring me down.

(C)2005 Aa Harvey. All Rights Reserved.
staysha Apr 2018
As i watch the tears fall from my sister's eyes as she is dragged by her hair

Her whimpers as her face gets scraped on the concrete.

The ****** elbows, ****** knees, ****** face all covered in her salty tears

The hazy yet sorrow filled look in her eyes, As each step the officer takes brings more tears down her face.

The one who was holding me back so i could not go save her.

My tears OUR tears splashing on the parking lot.

The look on the policeman's face as he shoves her in his car.

My mom yelling because he hurt my sister and she did not deserve it.

Just let it go  
it’s over now.
It was years ago
Don’t be a baby
She probably deserved it
Thats all thats the reason you dont like cops
The things people say all running through my head making me confused.
It reminds me of the time when i did not share just kept the hurt inside
The hurt of being touched and feeling really bad
Of ****** harassment in my own bed
At the tender age of  6 my childhood began to crumble
And from there it was as though if i tumbled i would fall
Fall into a life full of sadness and depression
So at the age of 15 i decided to grab a knife and punish myself
Punishment for not helping my sister at the age of 7
Punishment for being a burden
Punishment for my pain
Punishment for the pain i have caused the tears that paved the way
And the thing i carved right in my leg was
Be happy
I had to be happy about today and about tomorrow
Happy about the pain
Push through it was all so long ago anyways
I had to make myself ok
Make myself better so i could be a hero
And rescue my family forever
As it continued i began to remember the things i have gone through
My mom moved away was it my fault?
My sister is addicted to heroine is that my fault?
My heart feels as though a tap would make it crumble.
And with that i continue to stumble
Stumble through my life pretending everything is normal
Worried that i will hurt someone and make them feel alone
Worried about what their lives are like at home
I cried myself to sleep night after night
And what i go for proof is the scars from that night
Oh yes i cracked eventually i broke down a sobbing mess
But in doing so told about the painful thing i did to my leg
I went to a therapist the 4th the 5th the 6th? Who knows what number this one is?
But what i do know is this
My pills seemed to stop working quite as well and know i feel as though my life is a lot like hell
I can’t fix it on my own
But why would i want to tell
I talk to my mom,my dad , both pairs but not together i talk to my sister who is doing fine but could always be better
I guess there is a redeeming part in the end
My family does not blame the way i did then
My family tells me they love me and they care
My family says they will be here for me even when i want to run
They will follow me for sure
When i say i'll run away
They all come run with me.
My family loves me this is true
But why i ask myself
But when i ask my question aloud the answer is yes
Yes we love your quirks yes we love your faults.
This is my story it is about me and it is true
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