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Nikita Jul 12
In the distance
A light began to shine
Sitting on the porch
We waited curiously

A soft tap was heard
The tapping grew louder
As we exchanged glances
A lady’s voice called out to us

“Stop it” She yelled.

In the distance
The light grew brighter and hungrier
As quick as an engine roared to start
The roar just as quickly, came to a halt

Frustrated murmurs
Fists against glass
He wanted his keys
Leave her alone, please

I imagined the stench of his whiskey stained breath
As possible scenarios invaded my head
Was she safe? Was he drunk?

I asked these questions out loud
But I don’t remember any answers
Searching for them myself
I stumbled closer to the sound

Now she was screaming.
Don’t hurt me
Please don’t hurt me
There’s a baby

I had to help her.

Running back towards the group
No memory of talking to them
I’m sure that I did
I only remember

Gritting my teeth
Closing my eyes
Covering my ears
Trying to block out the sound

Her screams and cries for help
Slowly morphed and twisted
Into my brothers voice
His six year old voice

The tapping on the window
Became the rattling of a bunk bed
The woman’s screams and yelling
Became my baby brothers cries for help

I’ve gone backwards.
10 years.

It’s been three days since
I heard her yell
And three days since
his screams began

It’s been three hours since
I took the pill bottle
And three hours since
I put it down again
It was a painful night. I don’t think I can ever put into words how helpless I felt that night. No experience has ever felt as close to my childhood before. The police were called and I think that she’s okay. I’m okay now too thanks to my beautiful friends and partner.
Nikita May 18
As sweet as candy
Don’t you think watermelons dandy?

It’s got seeds
It’s nice and fresh
It’s green

There’s no other fruit in sight
I’d like to eat
Nikita May 18
Tight in my grip
I feel your nails slip
Digging deep
Digging hard
She says to me
He left me a card
Nikita May 18
As you breathe out
I **** in
Wondering
Where all my life
have you been?
Nikita May 18
Roll forward
Clench the cutch
I look at you and
How I love you so much
Nikita May 18
Push me
Blow against my skin
Ptsd you win
Nikita Mar 28
Push me
Pull me
Shape me
And mould me

Invent me
Destroy me
Create me
Lie to me

Pack me
Wrap me
Seal me
Deliver me

No matter how hard
You try

No matter how much
You hurt

I will always shatter
Your image
High expectations and cookie cutter categories. **** that.
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