-
She said she had a lot of baggage
Running from things she's been avoiding
Since a young age
I told her we were in the same boat
I'm also trying to stay afloat
-
Few days later I was her favourite
Late night calls and early texts
Those park dates were best
Surrounded by a crowd but it feel like
It was just the two of us
We would bearly notice the rest
-
I said with you I don't feel alone
And that my feelings for came like a cyclone
Maybe I came in too strong
But I felt weak after she said
I feel like that too
But we should keep it in the friendzone
-
Lowkie ®

It's temporary, yet we seek it.
It's forbidden, yet we lust it.
It's deadly, yet we crave it.
It's addictive, yet we "experiment".
It's disappointing, yet we never learn.
It's surprising, yet we rush it.
It's tasteless, yet it's fills us.
It's dreadful, yet it's unexplainable.
It's spiteful, yet it's addictive

-
I salute you for raising me on your own
Through blood, sweat and tears
Look mom I'm still here
Look mom I'm all grown
-
I have some issues I have to get through
But I don't want them affecting you
My dreams, my thoughts, my poetry
It may all sound like a mess to you
But I feel like God sent me with a message
And delivering it is something I have to do
-
I'm sorry if I didn't turn out as you expected
But in this world
You always got to make room for disappointments
I'm sorry if I didn't turn out as you expected
But in this world
I felt rejected
I did not become suicidal
Because that's what expected
I became a story teller
Now I feel accepted
-
Lowkie ©
Thoughts Of A Quiet Mind ©

#happymothersday  🌹🌺

Mary Jane here we go again
Just me and you on this private plane
We hit a few turbulents from the ****
But we were able to maintain and came back strong
We should not be doing this
But how can something so right be so wrong
-
And now we are faded
Out of space, this world we evaded
On a new level, we evaluated
Inner peace, we mediated
Inner circle, no blunts rotated
Mental peace, we medicated
-
Mary Jane here we go again
On this journey, you and I
I was lost until you heard my cries
And as we watch how time flies
I no longer feel lonely with you by my side
Take me along on your ride
As you cruise through my mind
-
Lowkie ©

-
I wish I could go back in time
To tell that little boy it's okay to cry
Pour your heart out until
Your tears go dry
Because it will hard to move forward
If you don't give 'letting go' a try
-
I wish I could go back in time
To tell that little boy to practice his rhymes
Perform to your friends in your free time
I know you got a lot your mind
But no matter what the voices say
You never stop the climb
To reach your prime
-
I wish I could go back in time
To commit a crime
By changing what happened in the past
And alter the present
In hopes of a better future
-
Lowkie®

-
Early morning I wake up
As the morning sunlight
Shines so bright
Its time to gather all my might
To make through another day
Morning prayer
Hoping that when I die
I'll see the light
-
During the day
Pretend that everything is alright
Rolling up a white paper
Just to catch a flight
Daydreaming of new poems
That I want to write
-
Every night I lay on my bed
Another battle I have to fight
Can't seem to rest my eyes
Cause my thoughts are loud
All through the night
Another sleepless night
-
Lowkie®

-
"Hey I read your poems
I like how your words rhyme
Are you a rapper and a poet in your free time?"
-
I am no rapper and I'm not trying to be one
Honestly from where I stand
I can see how studios are getting crammed
With people who don't really have the talent
All they know is how to get lit (sh*t)
Which lead to a whole new culture (skrt)
-
Don't get me wrong, I want to be part of this new wave
A poet showing these rapper how to really play this game
I speak with the tongue of your fathers
So you better behave
I speak with the tongue of your fathers
They're probably turning in their graves
-
I am a poet, not a rapper
Maybe I should jump on a beat
And show them I can do it better
Cause this is where it all started, at poetry
But now everyone is throwing words around hopelessly
-
Lowkie ®

-
Hey you
Did anyone ever tell you you're beautiful?
With all your flaws and mistakes
Your imperfections is what makes you great
Your inner beauty is something they can't take
-
Hey you, yes you
Did anyone ever tell you that you're cool
Don't let anybody make you feel like a fool
I know this world can be cruel
Don't let them get to you
Believe in yourself
That's the number one rule
-
I know how it feels to be degraded
The judgment was weighing heavy on me
I started getting faded
I couldn't look at myself in the mirror
All I saw was what the world had concluded
I'm still struggling to let go of that illusion
-
Lowkie ©

-
Why do you chase perfection?
"Because I fear rejection"
So you'd lose yourself
Just for attention
From people who don't really matter?
-
There is no such thing as perfection
She might not be perfect to you
But she's perfect to me
Because you saw her flaws
And figured she's not worth the call
I saw her flaws
And that's when her beauty started to show
-
Love your imperfections
You don't need everyone's acceptance
Trying to be something you're not
Is too much maintenance
Rather be yourself
Then the right people will accept you
Flaws and all
-
Lowkie®

-
I'm grateful for my depression
It taught me compassion
It taught me how to write poetry with a passion
It taught me life is not all sunshine and roses
And in order to heal
You have to let pain run its course
-
I'm grateful for my anxiety
It taught me to overthink things
And that the first decision
Is not always the best decision
It taught me how to draw conclusions
Although to some people it might cause confusion
-
I'm grateful for the voices in my head
Although they keep me awake at night
Whenever I'm down
They motivate me to get back up and fight
-
Accept who you are and be grateful
There's no one else like you so be graceful
Everyday is a gift so be thankful
Better days are coming so be fateful
-
Lowkie®

I'm a poet, but not a conversationalist
All these thoughts going through my head
But really, I don't talk a lot
"Why you so quiet"
My tongue is caught in a knot
I'll probably turn into a different person
After another shot
-
I'm a thinker, not a speaker
If you want to get know me
You'll probably have to dig deeper
Analyzing my every response
Before finding a simple one
That might hopefully reach you
-
I'm a poet, I'm a thinker
I'm not a conversationalist, I'm not a speaker
If you approach me
I'll probably keep it brief
Maybe it's a blessing or maybe it's a curse
But if you want to get to know me
I'll have to let you into my conscious first
-
Lowkie©

Tick tock real talk
How do I get pass this mental block?
I know
I'll have some of this white rock
Crush it up like its white chalk
Up my nose you go
My brain you have to unlock
Pop a pill to get loose
I mean, why not?
-
Tick tock real talk
Where's there's smoke, there's fire
Or a couple of stoners getting higher
I wonder who’s their supplier
Maybe he got what I need
To satisfy my desire
-
Tick tock real talk
I can hardly walk
One shot
Two shots
Three shots
Four shots to many
I can hardly see the door
How did I end up on the floor?
I think I had enough
But there's this voice telling me
"You'll be okay, drink some more"
-
And that's when it hits me
I'm intoxicated to my core
Inside my head, its war
Control over my body
That's what we're fighting for
No more
I want all these substances gone
But it’s too late now
I'm already torn
-
Lowkie

-
I write my pain on a piece of paper
Hoping to forget it later
They told me it would make me stronger
But all it did was get me addicted to the torment
Now all I ever think about
Is how to write my pain in different formats
-
The reactions I get for my thoughts are crazy
Don't get me wrong
I like the attention, it motivates me
Poetry has changed me
People say I'm beast with a pen
But really I'm just basic
I got people praying that I make it
I'm just praying I don't go crazy
-
I write my pain on a piece of paper
Hoping to forget it later
"How do you still feel alone
When people are telling you they're going through the same thing?"
That's what changed me
While others rate me
I pray we don't go past the point of 'no saving'
-
Lowkie®

-
I bet you've heard of drunk texting
I bet you've experienced drunk calling
Now let me introduce you to drunk poetry
-
I'm intoxicated off these words I'm spelling
Truth in my cup and I'm spilling
These thoughts got my head spinning
Double cups filled with my pain
Mumble rappers think they got game
Trouble should be my middle name
Cause I can switch rhyme schemes
Like some people switch lanes
-
They say the drunk never lie (that's a lie)
I don't want to wear a suit and tie
So bury me in a T-shirt and track paints when I die
Promise not to cry
I know its hard saying goodbye
That's why we get high and drunk while we young
We just want to have a good time
-
Lowkie®

-
I'll be freestyling on these verses
And they will flow like I'm writing in cursive
Thanks to the voices in my head
They are a blessing and a curse
Everybody has their own free will
But I love it when you're being submissive
-
Tonight we are young, wild and free
With the spotlight
Of the moonlight
And the morning sunlight
Lights upon us while we dance
Grab your partner
There is more people jumping over the fence
-
Men in blue comes in two
Red and blue lights mistaken as party lights
But we have our hands in the air
So we just don't care
Put the guns down, seize fire
Don't spoil the fun, this is a peaceful fight
We're just trying to make it through the night
-
Lowkie ®

-
Why don't parallel lines ever meet?
Is it because they are too similar
And if they ever could meet
The one will fit the other
And they would be complete
-
Maybe life never intended for them to meet
I mean look at Adam and Eve
Two half's of which made one whole
Made one mistake
That would spiraled the world out of control
God probably saw it wasn't good and he said no more
-
But it leaves me to question
People who found their other halfs
What secret do they know that we don't
Or do they get to happy and we don't
If so then where did we go wrong
-
When I look at you
I see the mirror image of me
When I think of it
Together we can set each other free
But maybe life never intended for us to be
And just like parallel lines
Maybe we're not supposed to meet
-
Lowkie ®

-
How did I end up loving you?
Is it the way you move?
Looks you're ready to conquer the world
-
The same world that bought me pain
The same world that wanted me to change
The same world that made me feel like a caged bird
-
I love you cause you conquered my world
-
How did I end up loving you?
Is it the way you speak?
Your voice acts like my anxiety meds
-
Every time you speak
Another voice in my head goes to sleep
That means one less suicidal thought
That means one more demon defeated
-
I love you cause there's nothing
That heals me like you do

Lowkie®

Lately I've been going through a phase
I got ninty-nine problems I'm not willing to face
Not because I don't want to
I just don't have the strength it takes
Everything I touch breaks
-
Well except for this pen and paper
And the words on this page
-
With every word I write down
The weight becomes lighter
The problems becomes lessor
And for a brief moment
Life becomes better
And I gain my strength again
-
For a brief moment I don't feel insane
And although life is a game I didn't choose
I still press continue and carry on playing
Facing my ninty-nine problems
With just a mere pen and paper
And these sonnets I'm creating
-
Lowkie®

Routine
-
Wake up and brush your teeth
Bath and go to eat
Leave the house looking neat
Cause there's "important" people you might meet
Get home and eat
Do what you have to before going to sleep
Next morning, repeat.
-
This is what life is suppose to be
Live in a routine until your 6 feet deep
Out there, noone really cares how you feel
As long as obey to societies needs
Your life is complete
-
I don't believe in déjà vu anymore
Everyday is the same thing
Nothing is new anymore
Yet life is unique, oh please
Ask yourself this
Are you alive or just on repeat?
-
Lowkie®

To whom it may concern
When I die
Light up my body and let it burn
I wish the tables could turn
I pray I die and return
Because this is not me
This is not who I hoped to be
-
To whom it may concern
Know that I'm going to a better place
A place where I can be free
A place where I can be me
A place with no past
A place with no future
A place with no hate
A place with no jealously
A place of peace
A special place for people like me
-
To whom it may concern
I'm killing myself but not physically
I'm killing the person who they thought I would be
-
Lowkie®

Fake Smiles
-
I tried being happy for a while
Everything was going fine
Until I realized
It was all just a lie.
-
We all come from somewhere
We all got a story to tell
We all try to hide the pain
But does it seem to fade away?
-
I looked in the mirror
And I saw a broken me looking back
I thought the mirror was cracked
I decided to cover the mirror with something bigger
But wherever I saw a reflection of myself
It was still cracked.
-
I realized there's no use
Trying to hide behind
A fake smile,
While I'm broken inside
-
Lowkie ®

One rose for the loved ones we lost
Through memories
You will forever live on in our thoughts
In our hearts
We carry the lessons you taught us
Through our mouths
We speak the language you spoke
-
Another rose for our silent soldiers
With scars that show physically
From wars that they fight mentally
-
People labelled them as crazy
Parents often refers to them as lazy
As they sit under the palm trees
Dazed off the purple haze
Wondering through their mental maze
Searching for a mental escape
Hiding behind a smile and "I'm okay thanks."
-
Lowkie ®

I'm depressed but not suicidal
I'm depressed but not suicidal
I'm depressed but not suicidal
I'm depressed but not suicidal
Why do I say this?
-
I do hear voices in my head
Telling me that I should be dead
Telling me that life is not fair
Telling me that no one really cares
Like come on?
I've been hearing this for years
Am I suppose to be scared?
-
God has bigger plans
That's why I'm still here
That's why I still stand
Life is not fair
It's not fair to anybody
People think they got life figured out
But what happens behind closed doors
Is not my business to say
People do care (in their own human-ish way)
And even if they fake it, I'll be okay
-
I do hear voices in my head
They all starting to sound the same
Whenever I get a glimpse at happiness
They always have something to say
-
Don't let them get to you
They just want to break you down
Don't let them have that effect on you
-
Whenever I hear them
I know I'm doing something right
Something that these demons didn't like
So they come back looking for another fight
But that okay cause I've seen the light
They go silent once I've gathered all my might
After me writing this
And after you reading this
I hope we can both sleep peacefully tonight
-
Lowkie®

-
We all need something
Something to feel
Something that's real
Something that helps deal with pressure of life
Some people pop pills
Some people smoke ****
Some people drink alcohol until they can't feel
-
There are people who think they're clean
People who don't substances
Great life choice
But you're still hooked on something
L.O.V.E
The deadliest drug of them all
-
I tend to think I know life
I tend to think I'm in control
I tend to relapse and smoke ****
Just to escape to my little world
There's too much to deal with
In the real world
-
Lowkie®

-
I see ghosts
No, not the ones you see in horror movies
No, not the ones that possess and use people as hosts
These ghosts belongs to the skeletons in your closet
The ones you try to hide while looking for closure
The ones you wish would just disappear.
-
I hear voices
With your thoughts so loud, it's not like I have much of a choice
Some are crying out for help
Some are telling me how you got hurt by these boys
Some are confused
Some are telling begging me to tell you to stop using these girls as toys
-
I feel things
From a mere handshake to intense eye contact
I feel those feelings you try to hold back
I feel the anxiety attack
The weight you carry on your back
The depression relapse
As you hide behind that smile
So that no one else sees that
-
I feel your happy feelings too
Those butterflies you get when you see your boo
That blissful moments when you're with the crew
I feel that too
But while walking around in your shoes
I sometimes forget I still have to wear mine too
-
Lowkie ®

-
Cross some t's, dot some i's
It's like everyone left without saying their goodbyes
But look at my eyes
Clear as the blue sky
I have no more tears left to cry
Why? Why? Why?
-
Wait, the world just paused for a minute
I tried to smile but everything still feels gloom
Its like I'm trapped in this one room
In this body I am entombed
Resume, everything is fine they assume
-
I had nothing poetic to say
So I came up with this word play
The voices decided to come out and play
A good night sleep they want to delay
Memories of you they want to replay
I'm stuck between fed up and okay
But still praying everything turns out for the better one day
-
Lowkie©

Excuse me while I get this off my chest
You packed your bags and left
That was probably for the best
You probably moved on
And I probably can't be compared to the rest
I guess love isn't really love until you put it to the test
-
Today I had nothing better to do
But to sit here and think about you
Believe me it wasn't something I planned to do
It just happened out of the blue
And it got me wondering
Do you still think about me too
-
We both went our separate ways
But the memories still haunt me
About how close we were back in the days
Don't mind me because I'm just going through this phase
Where old memories start to replay
-
Lowkie®

-
Hold me closer
I feel like I'm losing myself
I feel I'm getting colder
As I grow older
I realise my life has no order
Or maybe it has
I'm just not the controller
-
Hold me closer
I feel my heart becoming colder
I don't see the need to cry on someone's shoulder
I write down my feelings hoping for some closure
People think I do poetry for exposure
Really I'm just trying to numb the pain
And keep the tears away
-
Hold me closer
For years I've been called a loser
Now I'm stuck with the voices in my head
I want them to shut up so bad
Just so that I could go to bed
-
Lowkie®

You and I
We see the world through the same eyes
When you cry, I cry
When you smile, I smile
When you say jump, I ask how high
Together we shine like the stars in the sky
-
You and I
We walk this Earth together
No matter the storm, no matter the weather
In you I found treasure
No scale could measure
Much more valuable than gold
This type of love is rare
Or so I've been told
-
You and I
Me and You
Been praying for someone like you
And now my prayers came true
We both know the world can be cruel
But we got each other so it's cool
-
Lowkie ©

-
U + Me equals to a mathematical problem
Solve for x but there's no answer at the bottom
Believe me I tried calculating the variables
But no matter what, the answer is still unattainable
Y you ask? Because this equation is unexplainable
-
Remember the X you told me not to worry about
Yeah the one you said left a mark
I know you still see him in the dark
He still is the flame in your life
And I guess that makes me just a spark
-
But I'm not perfect
There was a X I had to subtract
I told you I did just so you don't overreact
But as our arguments multiplies
Our attention to solve this problem divides
I am no mathematician but
The sum just don't add up and after so many tries
Maybe it's about time to say our final goodbyes
-
Lowkie ®

I don't perform my own rhymes
Personally I feel I don't have much time
People tell me I'm good at poetry
Man I only do it to unwind
We all need a break sometime
-
After this then I'll be fine again
Until the voices come knocking on my door again
Roll some **** up and get high again
Pick up my pen and write my train of thoughts again
So much for an escape plan
-
I talk but no one is really listening
So I write these words down
Hoping you'll hear my voice as you're reading
Hoping you'll get a sense of how I'm feeling
-
This is just my way of dealing
Calm down, stop worrying
This is my way of healing
My thoughts haunt me at night as I look up to the ceiling
But my heart is at ease
Because I know God is seeing me
My soul is at peace
Because God is still blessing me
-
Lowkie©

-
Excuse me Miss
May I please have this last dance
Before your favourite song ends
We can take it slow
I will hold you close if you give me the chance
-
Excuse me Miss
May I please have this last dance
Pardon my stance
I'm not really good at romance
Practice makes perfect
But this is my only chance
-
Excuse me Miss
May I please have this last dance
Before your man comes
And I'll never get to see you again
You're looking for something different
I could tell when we both stole a glance
To be honest
You have me in a trance
I am yours
But only for one last dance
-
Lowkie®

-
Sometimes I want to drown my sorrows with *****
But then I realize its not worth a shot
Sometimes I want to get so high
But then I realize I can't smoke my problems away
Sometimes I want to take all these pills at once
But then I realize it won't take the pain away
-
Sometimes I want to rip my heart out of my chest
But then I realize its not mine to take
Sometimes I want to put a bullet through my head
But then I realize its not that bad
Sometimes I want to write down all my feelings
But then I realize I don't know what to say
-
Sometimes I don't know how to handle all the pressure
So I ignore it hoping it will go away
Sometimes I don't know what to do
So I break down and pray
-
Lowkie®

-
I built walls so high
To keep the ones that hurt me outside
And ended up being alone on the inside
After a while I got used to being alone on this side
Afraid of hurting again so I hide
-
I pushed people away
So that they don't see the real me
Keeping all these feelings inside
Because I don't know who to trust
Eventually it started eating me up inside
And I felt empty inside
While smiling on the outside like everything is fine
-
I lived in my own little bubble
Minding my own, I didn't want trouble
But you noticed me
And the walls started to crumble
You wanted someone to talk to
So I lend you my ear
You said all the right words I needed to hear
And all I could do was mumble
-
Lowkie ®

-
Let me take you down memory lane
Before all the scars and the pain
Before all the love in me was drained
There was a time when I had no shame
To say I love you the same
-
We both needed some company
Until she said
"I give you my heart, please no funny games"
We both had no intention to fall in love
But all that changed
When I said
"I love you and I hope you feel the same"
-
Sadly this is no fairy tale
No happily ever after
No wedding bells
Because you walked out of my life
And I was caught with my tail in-between my legs
-
Lowkie®

-
I'm sorry that we're not the same
You enjoy the sun
While I prefer the rain
You enjoy early morning runs
I play video games for fun
-
I'm sorry we're not the same
Everybody knows your name
Very few people know me
And they think I'm clinically insane
You live for the fame while
I try to hide my shame
-
I'm sorry we are the same
The mirror is dividing us, you and me
I am you and you are me
To the world we are two different people
But in this mirror we are equal
-
Lowkie ®

Yeah I have family
Yeah I have friends
But what's the point
If it feels like none of them cares
Maybe I'm in my head again
Maybe it's just a figment of my imagination
-
I could be alone for hours long
No human contact
No sense of belonging
Not feeling the need to please people
Or reach out to people
Some might say this sounds evil
But I'm fine with the monsters in my head
Sometimes they can be peaceful
-
I feel alone
I live in a bubble of my own
That's how I've survived
That's how I've grown
Surrounded by tall walls that hardly crumble
Some days feels like the Royal Rumble
Some days feels like my life is about to tumble
Yet I try so hard to be humble
-
Lowkie®

Lately I've been having some off days
Lately I've been feeling dazed
Physically I'm here
Mentally I'm in a different space
Walking around with a blank face
-
Socially awkward
I don't mix well in a crowded place
They ask me
"What's on your mind"
I tell them
"If I told you, you'd be left with a bitter taste"
Cause the truth is a hard pill to swallow
So, I keep it in a case, just in case
-
Leave me be
In my head space
It's my safe space
Although my depression and anxiety
Took up most of the space
I still think of you when I look at that blank space
-
Lowkie ®

Smile because

Someday everything will be okay
Might not be today but one day so
In the meantime
Live life and
Exist in the moment
-
Lowkie ©

-
They say humans are social beings
Thats how we survive on this Earth
But I've realized some people will treat you like dirt
But that's cool
Because others will make you feel like you have worth
-
Being asocial does not mean
I don't communicate
I just don't want my life
To complicate
So I observe everyone
Trying to figure out who's real and who's fake
-
I know what you're probably thinking
"He's judging a book by its cover"
I don't judge, I do a simple reading
Kind of like skimming
Trying to figure out is the book really worth reading
Or am I gonna waste my time
Trying to complete it
Choose wisely
-
Lowkie©

"I'm Okay"
-
Woke up today
With a smile on my face
Life was moving at a steady pace
And I was in my "happy" phase
"Today is going to be a beautiful day"
Until you came out to play
-
See I thought I was okay
And that I finally got you to obey
But I guess you were patiently waiting
To escape with your sneaky ways
You've always been good at that
You always seemed to get your way
-
Don't ask me how I'm doing
I'll just say "I'm okay"
When really I'm trapped in my own head
And I being tortured on most nights while going to bed
-
Don't ask me how I'm doing
I'll just say "I'm okay"
When really I don't want you to become sad
When I tell you that things upstairs are pretty bad
But that's okay
Because tomorrow I will wake up again
With a smile on my face
Hoping life moves in a steady pace
While I enter my "happy" phase
And carry on
On my Mary ways
-
Lowkie ®

-
I tried to forget about you
But you are all that seems to be on my mind.
I thought I lost myself in you
But the closer I get to you
The more I feel like myself.
-
I don't believe in love
But with you I feel something special.
This feeling is beyond ******.
This feeling must  be unnatural.
-
I can write poetry about you all day
But sadly you won't notice
Because you don't feel the same way.
I wish I could stay
But the more I see you
The harder it becomes for me to love myself.
-
Lowkie ®

-
Life is moving at a different pace
Physically I'm here
Mentally I'm in a different place
A place where everything makes sense
A place where there's no rules to bend
A place where I feel safe
-
Lately I've been in a different space
Lost in my thoughts
I don't want to be traced
Because outside
Outside
All the bad things are waiting to take place
Things that I'm not ready to face
But inside
Inside
I feel safe
You left me alone
But I found my happy place
-
Lowkie®

-
I look outside
The gentle breeze of ignorance
Stimulates my brain cells
Some of these thoughts
I can't tell
So I write a poem
And hope it knocks at someone's home
I am a artist
And I write what I see
-
I look inside
The walls are covered in ink
Its not graffiti
I just needed to think
The untrained eye is too blind to see
All my hopes, goals and even my darkest dreams
Please don't open the red door
Please don't start that war
For I'm only human
And I can't take much more
-
Lowkie