Each step, feels like shes walking in
quicksand
Last chance, it feels like shes got nothing
left

She was once the ocean...
You were a sailor at sea
Alive with excitement of her mysteries
Till you finished your chart and took your leave..

A song, was the thought of your voice in her
head
A demon, you've left scars buried deep in her
chest

She was once infinite space
You were an astronaut exploring
One small step for love, one giant step for the bed
Once your flag was planted, you packed up and left.....

Looking back on the past
Your mind not allowed to rest
You had forgotten all the reasons you fell
And years after the end you remember it all...
Seems like you've fallen again...
What a *******.

I see the sun
I see the sun......again

When the wind blows
When the wind blows, I smell you

Overcast, my emotional weather
I thought it would always last
I thought it would never pass
Couldn't break free,I was stuck in the past
And all the advice I was given
I crumbled it up like wasted flyer paper
Fell out​ somewhere between my hand, pocket
And garbage cans
Couldn't move these clouds if I tried
Shadows and rain falling only on and around me
Kept my head down to keep the water out my ears...

Just kidding, they were tears

Cuz who am I fooling
If I wasn't overthinking my next step
I was contemplating sui...sin...

Till a light.....shined



and I
I could see the sun
I could see the sun again...

I looked up and saw you.

It's easy to lift you up, without possessing your heart
You aren't born this cold, it's something you learned after
Had you crossed that street, you may have avoided disaster
Atleast from the beginning I warned her
But those warnings were drowned out with laughter
Fingers like smoke touching skin
And a stroke that felt like loving
Sweet words whispered in silence
But lack of fulfillment
brought forth corruption

"Jaded eyes, are the hardest to soften."

If I had known
would I still be on a throne?
One created in which I held such,
A beautiful world in the palm of my hands

I've turned everything to sand
this is the home on which my castle stands
My actions have become the waves creeping
up the shore
washing it all away

I'm too stubborn to make things better on a re-do
There'd be so many memories to lose
A good decision for me, is like searching for a needle in a haystack
Regret is an emotion, you cant take back

When you regretted your love for me, that's when I knew I went so far, I couldn't come back.....

I feel like a ghost
wanting more
Can you warm my cold soul
I've seen you smile
and light up a room
I've seen you make cheeks go from pale to rose
can you flash that smile on me
I've always seen it from afar
I bet your laughter reaches the furthest star
causing supernovas
can I just hear it if I speak about the nonsense I feel myself
to be

I fell into discord
got used to this hole
But when you sang, your song
I realized
I could never go back
oh no no
no no no no....
I don't want to be here anymore.

When you spoke
I listened to your words
And against my better judgement
Let them sink into my heart
And believed every single part

Call me naive if you want
I just opened my heart
Call me a fool if you want
I've felt it often enough


Well...that was just my mistake...
I should have read between the lies

I feel some of the fog has lifted
a moment of clarity

I love you
I love you
I love you

I feel some of the fog has lifted
I can remember why I'm doing this

I love me
I love me
I love me

If nothing else makes sense
I can at least turn to these feelings

oh how much they've kept me
grounded in reality
when everything and everyone else
feels like make believe

Like an empty cavern
This hollow secret place was once barred and closed off

Till you stepped in like a miner
with your lamp of words and touch

You turned this place into your home
little did I know, day by day
You'd dig in close
And chip away at me
more and more

Till the day you cast me like a die in a game
I couldn't yet know I was to be a pit stop
on your road to find a place to go
I was not the knight that had come to rescue you, if only it were so
I went from being a lonely soul
To now understanding what more the world could hold

I know it wasn't the end goal
But my naivety
Left me without a way to know that I would be
a paper castle in a storm....

We'll judge you when we're high
when we're high
You're a creature, you're divine
You're my comfort love
you are fine

I will judge you in my mind
I will judge you in my mind

You're a story you're a lie
Educate me when you smile
Beauty thank you that I'm high
Darling thank you that I'm high

So I could judge you
in my mind
Sort of like a magazine photo
I'll stare at late at night
So I could love you till I die

Fully in my mind when we're high
when we're high
You're a creature you're divine
You're my comfort love
you are fine

I will judge you in my mind
I will judge you in my mind

You're a story you're a lie
Educate me when you smile
Beauty thank you I'm high
Darling thank you that I'm high

So I could judge you
in my mind
So I'll convulse you
In my mind
So I could love you till I die

Fully in my mind

The faults of men (males)
And the sadness they create
With the words on their tongue
or tone in their voice

The way he touched her hair
how his hand lingered there
as nostrils flared
and you knew when he was close
It wasn't the scent of you he inhaled

The sin in his eyes
and how you could see it begin there
Before anything awkward began

The fault of man and how his soul glittered in the back in his eyes as you wept and stared
and let you know......

You were no longer mine.

You're only as real
as the amount of your soul I see.

I never said I was - she said
on hitching breath
while two knuckles deep,
can we go three with three

Guttural moan

Against this, so don't - she purred
A lick of fire against my lips
In a moment like this
I want more
Can I at least
for once
be
Icarus

"It wasnt the same as they describe it in the books.

Its not like watching a movie and getting teary-eyed because it connected with you in some way, shape or form.

There was a deeper sort of pain,beyond the physical spectrum.

A feeling they don't describe.
It was akin to those weird feelings you get while listening to music.

And Ill tell you this.
It wasnt easy to get over.

It didn't go away fast.

It HURT.....

It hurt every **** day."

The hardest part is the start
when you're unsure
as you stare into their eyes
are their feelings pure
are their intentions honest and clear

what kind of bed do your words rest on?
am I just another life to be led on
another soul to be fed on
another heart to be stepped on
which side of the scale will we ride on

it's hard to question the good
it's hard to expect the bad
it's hard to give up on the past
it's hard to wonder if this sweet feeling will last

I think I'm ready to heal
I think I'm ready to feel your words
I think I'm ready to heal
I think I'm ready to open you up to my world

So here's your ticket
Fly in, fly in, fly in
don't you dare make me regret it

There was a sun
Not enough time to wonder where the clouds went
My friends said I still don't hang
I picked time with you over time with them
Only because this was a different kind of light
I got a chance at a different kind of sight
A world where hope wasn't just a word others told you to hold
I ended up swallowed in what was and not what it had become
The clouds returned
And then again, came the rain.

What keeps us believing in eternity
in different places, surrounded and separated
by millions of hearts in between

What keeps us believing in forever
with this glass right in front of us
all that's left for us are numbers as words
to express our love, our love

Well that fire we've created upon meeting is
still burning, we feel it flickering
warming us in it's heat
bringing warmth to our hearts, when we're
alone....

What keeps us believing in finally being happy
while suffering so much at home
this few words we share across the screen
mean more to me...then you will ever know

Look at me again
with those guarded eyes,
freckled with bitterness
like glitter, and the forgotten love you can still taste on your tongue.

Do you breath a sigh of relief, now that you're gone?

My want is an ungranted wish
Since my words shot down all of the stars
That you once cast your gaze upon.

A many miles seperation
can't be what you want up close
everything about this exist
the way it does in binary code
Probably the best way
cuz there's no way
everything that's said could mean a thing
If we ever meet
the fantasy is always better than reality

I've walked miles in these shoes
Not many destinations were places I'd choose

Hard to say exactly who I was back then
When footsteps disappear in the sand

A mirage of an oasis in the distance
More like a long ago wish

I can never shake this feeling
That I'll ever truly obtain an outlet

So I just type out confusing puzzles
In order to get out feelings in words

Just to explain who I am in a world like this

....No one really makes me happy anymore
More like half smiles to a face broken in many places
by unfallen tear streaks
and frowns
Emitting noise just to see if it would be heard
Saying I love you, just to see if
I believe the words
coming from my own mouth.
I said I'd stick around
but those machines inside are running
down
down
down and soon the energy
keeping me up
is going to run out
So I should start running now....?

Words, they're stuck and stumbling, from the tip of my tongue
numb lips unfrozen
when your image runs across
My tear stained reddened eyes!
Can I call this love a cancer?
Can I call this love a cancer?

Cuz I breathe in your laughter and smiles like smoke!
And I'd happily smile and choke!
If its the last thing I see, before I croak!
Can I call this love a cancer?

My heart its been so cold!
If I had a dollar for everytime someone told me they loved me, Id be broke!
What makes me so special, an abundance of self-doubt
Can you rip out your eyes and trade with me?
Ive ripped out mine so I could take yours
and see what you say you see
What you seem to believe
you see.....
In me!

I ask myself so many times,
"Why are you here and what do you stand for?"
To have someone so good and amazing in my life
just seems so wrong but how strong, how strong
You must be to stay here and stay as you are

There's no reason for me to admit the obvious
who am I to deserve such a miracle in the form of you
In the real world, it's never supposed to work out like this, am I dreaming it this?
I mean you told me you love me!
How real could this be? Im suffocating in my disbelief... I'm suffocating in what you've called nothing special, when I've seen nothing short of perfect...

I've been sick with this fever of confliction
Wanting to say the three words, the same three words you've whispered in your sleep, and in my dreams, but what holds me back is my fear

The fear that you won't react the same way I do
When I hear them, not that you'd reject them
but soon that you'll realize I could never amount to the man you believe I could be, no
never do I believe that could be me...

I remember every moment we shared
every time you showed me you cared
I tried my best to be the best I could for you
I'd drop all of my life to prove what I mean

I'll somehow overcome my gears
I never want you to go, I never want you to leave
I want you to stay with me
I want to hold your face in my hands and admit even though I'm nothing
I'll fight to be everything

Just so you can hear me say I love you
You'll tell me you love me
and we'll both believe

I dream of witches
And when I would find them
They'd always cast a spell.

But never would I fear
I should not be here
Demons belong in hell....

Her screaming says it all
someone must fall
blood moon please save us all
As vision turned to black
there was discord and bells
heavy lust as we all fell....

but never fear
we should not be here
demons belong in hell...

Echoes in the deep
sounds like screaming
sounds like pleading
feels like bleeding
every single thought is stinging
I want it to end
not like that
maybe
it's not like that
but maybe...

If I'm quiet enough
I can hear your heartbeat
I'm not just living for me

But baby every single thought is stinging
echoes in the deep
it feels like I'm bleeding
echoes in the deep
can you hear me pleading
echoes in the deep
it sounds like the screaming is
coming from me

I can hear you
stumbling there in the dark
but I can't see you
and it just tears me apart
I feel you there, every day
I'm still not sure, what gets in the way
I have been somewhat okay
and I'd rather not hurt
Just to stir something awake
I hope that isn't the way to find
my miracle words from pain

if I were asked , are you okay
I would know not what to say
The way my feelings work
the way they ebb and flow
turns my headspace into an auditorium
full of noise
full of sorrow
full of love
with hopes for a better tomorrow
I guess I'll say I'm okay because
I've got to chase this wolf away
It breathes down my neck
It haunts every step
it salivates at the thought
of sinking it's fangs in again
and again and again
I'm hoping the meds take effect
like a huntsman
please release me from this beast
Until that time comes
I won't stop believing that I can be
free