PROLOGUE
               Hyde Park weekend of politics and pop,
Geldof’s gang of divas and mad hatters;
Sergeant Pepper only one heart beating,
resurrected by a once dead Beatle.
The ******, Queen and Irish juggernauts;
The Entertainer and dead bands
re-jigged for the sake of humanity.
   The almighty single named entities
all out for Africa and people power.
Olympics in the bag, a Waterloo
of celebrations in the street that night
Leaping and whooping in sheer delight
Nelson rocking in Trafalgar Square
The promised computer wonderlands
rising from the poisoned dead heart wasteland;
derelict, deserted, still festering.
The Brave Tomorrow in a world of hate.
The flame will be lit, magic rings aloft
and harmony will be our middle name.

On the seventh day of the seventh month,
Festival of the skilful Weaving girl;
the ‘war on terror’ just a tattered trope
drained and exhausted and put out of sight
in a dark corner of a darker shelf.
A power surge the first lie of the day.
Savagely woken from our pleasant dream
al Qa’ida opens up a new franchise
and a new frontier for terror to prowl.

               Howling sirens shatter morning’s progress
Hysterical screech of ambulances
and police cars trying to grip the road.
The oppressive drone of helicopters
gathering like the Furies in the sky;
Blair’s hubris is acknowledged by the gods.
Without warning the deadly game begins.

The Leviathan state machinery,
certain of its strength and authority,
with sheer balletic co-ordination,
steadies itself for a fine performance.
The new citizen army in ‘day glow’
take up their ‘Support Official’ roles,
like air raid wardens in the last big show;
feisty  yet firm, delivering every line
deep voiced and clearly to the whole theatre.
On cue, the Police fan out through Bloomsbury
clearing every emergency exit,
arresting and handcuffing surly streets,
locking down this ancient river city.
Fetching in fluorescent green costuming,
the old Bill nimbly Tangos and Foxtrots
the airways, Oscar, Charlie and Yankee
quickly reply with grid reference Echo;
Whiskey, Sierra, Quebec, November,
beam out from New Scotland Yard,
staccato, nearly lost in static space.
      
              LIVERPOOL STREET STATION
8.51 a.m. Circle Line

Shehezad Tanweer was born in England.
A migrant’s child of hope and better life,
dreaming of his future from his birth.
Only twenty two short years on this earth.
In a madrassah, Lahore, Pakistan,
he spent twelve weeks reading and rote learning
verses chosen from the sacred text.
Chanting the syllables, hour after hour,
swaying back and forth with the word rhythm,
like an underground train rocking the rails,
as it weaves its way beneath the world,
in turning tunnels in the dead of night.

Teve Talevski had a meeting
across the river, he knew he’d be late.
**** trains they do it to you every time.
But something odd happened while he waited
A taut-limbed young woman sashayed past him
in a forget-me-not blue dress of silk.
She rustled on the platform as she turned.
She turned to him and smiled, and he smiled back.
Stale tunnel air pushed along in the rush
of the train arriving in the station.
He found a seat and watched her from afar.
Opened his paper for distraction’s sake
Olympic win exciting like the smile.

Train heading southwest under Whitechapel.
Deafening blast, rushing sound blast, bright flash
of golden light, flying glass and debris
Twisted people thrown to ground, darkness;
the dreadful silent second in blackness.
The stench of human flesh and gunpowder,
burning rubber and fiery acrid smoke.
Screaming bone bare pain, blood-drenched tearing pain.
Pitiful weeping, begging for a god
to come, someone to come, and help them out.

Teve pushes off a dead weighted man.
He stands unsteady trying to balance.
Railway staff with torches, moving spotlights
**** and jolt, catching still life scenery,
lighting the exit in gloomy dimness.
They file down the track to Aldgate Station,
Teve passes the sardine can carriage
torn apart by a fierce hungry giant.
Through the dust, four lifeless bodies take shape
and disappear again in drifting smoke.
It’s only later, when safe above ground,
Teve looks around and starts to wonder
where his blue epiphany girl has gone.

                 KINGS CROSS STATION
8.56 a.m. Piccadilly Line

Many named Lyndsey Germaine, Jamaican,
living with his wife and child in Aylesbury,
laying low, never visited the Mosque.   
                Buckinghamshire bomber known as Jamal,
clean shaven, wearing normal western clothes,
annoyed his neighbours with loud music.
Samantha-wife converted and renamed,
Sherafiyah and took to wearing black.
Devout in that jet black shalmar kameez.
Loving father cradled close his daughter
Caressed her cheek and held her tiny hand
He wondered what the future held for her.

Station of the lost and homeless people,
where you can buy anything at a price.
A place where a face can be lost forever;
where the future’s as real as faded dreams.
Below the mainline trains, deep underground
Piccadilly lines cross the River Thames
Cram-packed, shoulder to shoulder and standing,
the train heading southward for Russell Square,
barely pulls away from Kings Cross Station,
when Arash Kazerouni hears the bang,
‘Almighty bang’ before everything stopped.
Twenty six hearts stopped beating that moment.
But glass flew apart in a shattering wave,
followed by a  huge whoosh of smoky soot.
Panic raced down the line with ice fingers
touching and tagging the living with fear.
Spine chiller blanching faces white with shock.

Gracia Hormigos, a housekeeper,
thought, I am being electrocuted.
Her body was shaking, it seemed her mind
was in free fall, no safety cord to pull,
just disconnected, so she looked around,
saw the man next to her had no right leg,
a shattered shard of bone and gouts of  blood,
Where was the rest of his leg and his foot ?

Level headed ones with serious voices
spoke over the screaming and the sobbing;
Titanic lifeboat voices giving orders;
Iceberg cool voices of reassurance;
We’re stoical British bulldog voices
that organize the mayhem and chaos
into meaty chunks of jobs to be done.
Clear air required - break the windows now;
Lines could be live - so we stay where we are;
Help will be here shortly - try to stay calm.

John, Mark and Emma introduce themselves
They never usually speak underground,
averting your gaze, tube train etiquette.
Disaster has its opportunities;
Try the new mobile, take a photograph;
Ring your Mum and Dad, ****** battery’s flat;
My network’s down; my phone light’s still working
Useful to see the way, step carefully.

   Fiona asks, ‘Am I dreaming all this?’
A shrieking man answers her, “I’m dying!”
Hammered glass finally breaks, fresher air;
too late for the man in the front carriage.
London Transport staff in yellow jackets
start an orderly evacuation
The mobile phones held up to light the way.
Only nineteen minutes in a lifetime.
  
EDGEWARE ROAD STATION
9.17 a.m. Circle Line

               Mohammed Sadique Khan, the oldest one.
Perhaps the leader, at least a mentor.
Yorkshire man born, married with a daughter
Gently spoken man, endlessly patient,
worked in the Hamara, Lodge Lane, Leeds,
Council-funded, multi-faith youth Centre;
and the local Primary school, in Beeston.
No-one could believe this of  Mr Khan;
well educated, caring and very kind
Where did he hide his secret other life  ?

Wise enough to wait for the second train.
Two for the price of one, a real bargain.
Westbound second carriage is blown away,
a commuter blasted from the platform,
hurled under the wheels of the east bound train.
Moon Crater holes, the walls pitted and pocked;
a sparse dark-side landscape with black, black air.
The ripped and shredded metal bursts free
like a surprising party popper;
Steel curlicues corkscrew through wood and glass.
Mass is made atomic in the closed space.
Roasting meat and Auschwitzed cremation stench
saturates the already murky air.              
Our human kindling feeds the greedy fire;
Heads alight like medieval torches;
Fiery liquid skin drops from the faceless;
Punk afro hair is cauterised and singed.  
Heat intensity, like a wayward iron,
scorches clothes, fuses fibres together.
Seven people escape this inferno;
many die in later days, badly burned,
and everyone there will live a scarred life.

               TAVISTOCK ROAD
9.47 a.m. Number 30 Bus  

Hasib Hussain migrant son, English born
barely an adult, loved by his mother;
reported him missing later that night.
Police typed his description in the file
and matched his clothes to fragments from the scene.
A hapless victim or vicious bomber ?
Child of the ‘Ummah’ waging deadly war.
Seventy two black eyed virgins waiting
in jihadist paradise just for you.

Red double-decker bus, number thirty,
going from Hackney Wick to Marble Arch;
stuck in traffic, diversions everywhere.
Driver pulls up next to a tree lined square;
the Parking Inspector, Ade Soji,
tells the driver he’s in Tavistock Road,
British Museum nearby and the Square.
A place of peace and quiet reflection;
the sad history of war is remembered;
symbols to make us never forget death;
Cherry Tree from Hiroshima, Japan;
Holocaust Memorial for Jewish dead;
sturdy statue of  Mahatma Gandhi.
Peaceful resistance that drove the Lion out.
Freedom for India but death for him.

Sudden sonic boom, bus roof tears apart,
seats erupt with volcanic force upward,
hot larva of blood and tissue rains down.
Bloodied road becomes a charnel-house scene;
disembodied limbs among the wreckage,
headless corpses; sinews, muscles and bone.
Buildings spattered and smeared with human paint
Impressionist daubs, blood red like the bus.

Jasmine Gardiner, running late for work;
all trains were cancelled from Euston Station;  
she headed for the square, to catch the bus.
It drove straight past her standing at the stop;
before she could curse aloud - Kaboom !
Instinctively she ran, ran for her life.
Umbrella shield from the shower of gore.

On the lower deck, two Aussies squeezed in;
Catherine Klestov was standing in the aisle,
floored by the bomb, suffered cuts and bruises
She limped to Islington two days later.
Louise Barry was reading the paper,
she was ‘****-scared’ by the explosion;
she crawled out of the remnants of the bus,
broken and burned, she lay flat on the road,
the world of sound had gone, ear drums had burst;
she lay there drowsy, quiet, looking up
and amazingly the sky was still there.

Sam Ly, Vietnamese Australian,
One of the boat people once welcomed here.
A refugee, held in his mother’s arms,
she died of cancer, before he was three.
Hi Ly struggled to raise his son alone;
a tough life, inner city high rise flats.
Education the smart migrant’s revenge,
Monash Uni and an IT degree.
Lucky Sam, perfect job of a lifetime;
in London, with his one love, Mandy Ha,
Life going great until that fateful day;
on the seventh day of the seventh month,
Festival of the skilful Weaving girl.

Three other Aussies on that ****** bus;
no serious physical injuries,
Sam’s luck ran out, in choosing where to sit.
His neck was broken, could not breath alone;
his head smashed and crushed, fractured bones and burns
Wrapped in a cocoon of coma safe
This broken figure lying on white sheets
in an English Intensive Care Unit
did not seem like Hi Ly’s beloved son;
but he sat by Sam’s bed in disbelief,
seven days and seven nights of struggle,
until the final hour, when it was done.

In the pit of our stomach we all knew,
but we kept on deep breathing and hoping
this nauseous reality would pass.
The weary inevitability
of horrific disasters such as these.
Strangely familiar like an old newsreel
Black and white, it happened long ago.
But its happening now right before our eyes
satellite pictures beam and bounce the globe.
Twelve thousand miles we watch the story
Plot unfolds rapidly, chapters emerge
We know the places names of this narrative.
  
It is all subterranean, hidden
from the curious, voyeuristic gaze,
Until the icon bus, we are hopeful
This public spectacle is above ground
We can see the force that mangled the bus,
fury that tore people apart limb by limb
Now we can imagine a bomb below,
far below, people trapped, fiery hell;
fighting to breathe each breath in tunnelled tombs.

Herded from the blast they are strangely calm,
obedient, shuffling this way and that.
Blood-streaked, sooty and dishevelled they come.
Out from the choking darkness far below
Dazzled by the brightness of the morning
of a day they feared might be their last.
They have breathed deeply of Kurtz’s horror.
Sights and sounds unimaginable before
will haunt their waking hours for many years;
a lifetime of nightmares in the making.
They trudge like weary soldiers from the Somme
already see the world with older eyes.

On the surface, they find a world where life
simply goes on as before, unmindful.
Cyclist couriers still defy road laws,
sprint racing again in Le Tour de France;
beer-gutted, real men are loading lorries;
lunch time sandwiches are made as usual,
sold and eaten at desks and in the street.
Roadside cafes sell lots of hot sweet tea.
The Umbrella stand soon does brisk business.
Sign writers' hands, still steady, paint the sign.
The summer blooms are watered in the park.
A ***** stretches on the bench and wakes up,
he folds and stows his newspaper blankets;
mouth dry,  he sips water at the fountain.
A lady scoops up her black poodle’s ****.
A young couple argues over nothing.
Betting shops are full of people losing
money and dreaming of a trifecta.
Martin’s still smoking despite the patches.
There’s a rush on Brandy in nearby pubs
Retired gardener dead heads his flowers
and picks a lettuce for the evening meal

Fifty six minutes from start to finish.
Perfectly orchestrated performance.
Rush hour co-ordination excellent.
Maximum devastation was ensured.
Cruel, merciless killing so coldly done.
Fine detail in the maiming and damage.

A REVIEW

Well activated practical response.
Rehearsals really paid off on the day.
Brilliant touch with bus transport for victims;
Space blankets well deployed for shock effect;
Dramatic improv by Paramedics;
Nurses, medicos and casualty staff
showed great technical E.R. Skills - Bravo !
Plenty of pizzazz and dash as always
from the nifty, London Ambo drivers;
Old fashioned know-how from the Fire fighters
in hosing down the fireworks underground.
Dangerous rescues were undertaken,
accomplished with buckets of common sense.
And what can one say about those Bobbies,
jolly good show, the lips unquivering
and universally stiff, no mean feat
in this Premiere season tear-jerker.
Nail-bitingly brittle, but a smash-hit
Poignant misery and stoic suffering,
fortitude, forbearance and lots of grit
Altogether was quite tickety boo.



NOTES ON THE POEM

Liverpool Street Station

A Circle Line train from Moorgate with six carriages and a capacity of 1272 passengers [ 192 seated; 1080 standing]. 7 dead on the first day.

Southbound, destination Aldgate. Explosion occurs midway between Liverpool Street and Aldgate.

Shehezad Tanweer was reported to have ‘never been political’ by a friend who played cricket with him 10 days before the bombing

Teve Talevski is a real person and I have elaborated a little on reports in the press. He runs a coffee shop in North London.

At the time of writing the fate of the blue dress lady is not known

Kings Cross Station

A Piccadilly Line train with six carriages and a capacity of 1238 passengers [272 seated; 966 standing]. 21 dead on first day.

Southbound, destination Russell Square. Explosion occurs mi

wanna beer wanna beer wanna beer

the aussie thing to do

then they go off to the pub and say wanna beer to you

i didn’t know what to say at first

these people do like me, yeah

they think i am cool very very cool

yeah they enjoy my company a lot

wanna beer wanna beer wanna beer

ya see the aussie thing

wanna beer wanna beer wanna beer

and a hamburger with the lot

ya see ya go to the footy and the first thing you hear is

wanna beer wanna beer wanna beer

the aussie thing to do

then you go off to the city

to a nightclub, a man blows his cigarette smoke right in your face

you say what, are you doing, then

you say

wanna beer wanna beer wanna beer

the aussie thing to do

you see you think your a man but you look like a hooligan

yeah, your aussie mate true blue

you look rough and ready to punch the guy next to you

and then you say

wanna beer wanna beer wanna beer

the aussie thing to do

wanna beer wanna beer wanna beer

better being a true blue

you see they look ***** and very very rude

as they say

wanna beer wanna beer wanna beer

the aussie thing to do

you go to the footy and then the cricket

and then off to the pub and park illegally and you get yourself a ticket

the police have arrested you, then they let you go

and the first thing you say is

wanna beer wanna beer wanna beer

the aussie thing to do

you see there is nothing wrong with the australian way of life

as long as they just leave me to do my own thing

i would love to have a packet of crisps

but i hear this

wanna beer wanna beer wanna beer

the aussie the aussie the aussie thing to do, MATE

hi dudes this briano alliano up here on saturn to welcome richie benaud and i can guarantee

the cosmos is blessed to have a great man, and here is richie singing come on aussie come on

hi everyone, i say hello to saturn

you see lillee pounded down like a machine

taylor was the best captain you’ll ever seen

brett lee got a hat trick, merv, kim and phil hughes were pretty rad yeah

till phil hughes died last year oh yeah

thommo is pounding like another machine

as a bowler he was very fast and mean

you see he will pick up wickets, while the outfielders clearing pickets

and the chappell eyes, have got their eyes on the green

then pascoe is making divvits in the green

border ordered his players around like noone you’ve ever seen

and rod marsh took some catches like healy and haddin, to win those matches

and i remember joel garner and micheal holding cleaned us out, oh yeseree

we still went, come on aussies come on, come on, come on aussies come on

after that small song, ritchie benaud took phil hughes on the cosmic turf, where my dad and mark jones

and tony grieg and rob douglas and stan niemic and phil hughes and many many more, and crocus’s earth body brian allan

played cricket at john knight memorial park, i made some great hook shots, it was cool, dad who had bias long legs

hit 34 runs off 45 *****, yeah and dad gave a methane smoothie to richie, saying welcome to the cosmos, and

mark jones hit 23 off 34 ***** and gave richie a new earth drink coca cola life, which is a drink which will put you

in touch with the cosmos, congratulations richie, marks my name, you will come back to earth when the cosmos is ready

to let you return and tony grieg scored 123 off 112 ***** and after that, he gave richie benaud a methane smoothie

and rob douglas got 87 off 100 *****, but rob said, good on you richie, you’ll a fine player, and tipped methane all over

richie saying, good job old pal, and stan niemic scored 123 off 123, and going at a run a ball, stan was happy, and when he finished

he poured methane all over saying welcome to the cosmos, and phil hughes scored 56 off 56 and went over to richie tippe

tipped a keg of methane on him and said thanks mate old chum old pal for those kind words and the other players together averaged at 123 off 122 *****

and richie benaud had methane smoothies all over him and at the end every player went into saturn club rings

to have a great celebration for the great richie benead with a lot of bottles and kegs of coca cola life, which will,

improve the quality of their lives on earth, and everyone was dripping with methane and might i add malcolm marshall bowled

very well as the official bowler getting 34 wickets, now malcolm marshall is matty b, on youtube, but this game was in honour

of the great richie benaud, welcomed to the cosmos and malcolm poured a bit of coca cola life on richie saying you love life, dude

and briano alliano came out and said

ritchie was the best commentator you’ll ever seen

you see i watched him on channel nine congratulate the gold and green

you see here everyone, welcome this great man

to the cosmos, he’s the happiest in the land

welcome ritchie benaud yeseree

the world will miss him, oh yeah you see

because you hosted nines coverage, of the cricket, well done mate

now what will buddha do with you

come on aussies come on come on, come on aussies come on

well done, ritchie benaud, WELCOME

see you next time, this was a great cosmic cricket match, dudes

now the saturn club rings was filled with methane, PARTY ON, to next life, ritchie

Yeah! - we win!
We Aussies win
the CoreData 2011 award:
each household will spend
an average of more than $1000
on gifts, food and deco for Xmas
Yeah! - we win!
China? $400 only
The French? $600 only
The Kiwis? $631 only
America? $644 only
The British? $815 only
Britain beats France - but
Yeah! - we Aussies beat 'em all!
Yeah! - we win!


We Aussies also win
the IBISWorld 2011 award:
Australia will spend $1.2 billion
on ***** just in December
Yeah, we win! And throughout 2011!
the UK? they drink only 10.58 litres
average year round
the USA? a paltry 8.42 liters average
And Down Under? - 10.61 litres this year
Yeah! - we win! we win! we win!

COOL TENTS WITH HOT FOOD
From the 10th diary entry of Stewy Lemmon's childhood adventures.

Finally, the day Smoochy and I had been waiting for had arrived. It was Saturday the 7th of March. The day we were heading off to the, 89th Boy Scouts & Girl Guides, combined World Jamboree. The jamboree was held this year in the Nevada desert in Las Vegas, USA.

My dad Archie, was the local scout leader for the Shimmerleedimmerlee 1st scout group and my mum Flo, was second in charge of the Barefeet Mountain 3rd Girl Guide group. Mum's friend was the Barefeet girl guides leader and she was named, Miss Alice Springs. Dad was making the trip with other local scout leaders and 11 of us boys. Mum and Miss Alice Springs were taking 11 girls from the local Barefeet Mountain girl guide group, including my two much older identical twin sisters, Emma and Jemma. Also coming along was my much younger brother, Lemmy and of course my grouse pet mouse, Smoochy.

Dad has been in the local boy scout group since he was very young and his father, John Lemmon, my grandfather, was also in the same scout group when it first began, all of those years ago.

There were boy scout and girl guide groups from all over the world attending the big camping and adventure event. People from far away places like Norway, France, Egypt, Australia, Holland, England, Brazil, Thailand, Hong Kong, Italy and of course the host nation, the United States of America.

Every group, brought with them their home nations own colourful flags and individually designed tents, based on their countries culture or famous landmarks. It was like having all of the countries of the world, all in the one place at a time.

The boy scout and girl guide group from Thailand had a tent that looked like a Buddhist Temple and also had an outdoor kitchen where they would make, such great tasting, but ever so hot and spicy, food from.

The Egyptian guys and girls had a massive high tent, that resembled the world famous giant Pyramid of Giza. It must of taken them ages to make the angles so perfectly straight and with extreme precision.

Holland's tent was a large and fully operational, colourful windmill. It, even had it's very own water tank. The windmill tent was painted with colours and designs that even impressed my very artistic dad.

He said, 'He might even have to redecorate his unusually built, outrageously painted, outback, backyard shed and use some of the bright paint colours and fancy designs the boys and girls had done'.

The next tent was very big and long from the boy scout and girl guide groups of, Australia. It had been designed to look like the, Sydney harbour bridge. But it didn't have a roof to protect them from the weather, while they slept shoulder to shoulder, across the wooden bridge road. But, like most Aussies with relaxed and casual attitudes they said, 'She'll be right mate, Rain, Hail or Shine'.

The guys and gals from Italy, had a tent that was leaning over to the right, just like the, famous Leaning Tower of Pisa. They assured us all that it wouldn't fall over. 'Trust us, they said'.

Hong Kong had a very long tent that was based on the colourful, cultural inspired dragon. It had a lot of tent pegs on either side, to keep it's ever winding position in place. It was the most colourful and coolest tent of all. But at the same time, the most scariest tent of them all.

England's tent was based on the very historic, Tower of London. It even had two very serious looking guards on patrol out front, made out of paper mâché.

Norway's tent was in the shape of, a Vikings fighting helmet. It had, two large horns coming out from the left and right hand sides. It looked like a raging bull, in a bizarre sort of way.

Brazil came up with a giant yellow and green football, based on their national sport and colours of the country, for its design. All of us just hoped, 'It didn't get a sudden hole in it and start to knock over all of our tents, just like a giant pinball game'.

France went for a super, duper structure, that was wide at the bottom and became thinner towards the top. It was in the shape of the Eiffel Tower, of course. It was the tallest tent at the jamboree camping grounds and provided the best views from atop.

While the host nation the USA decided to honour the, Native American Indians. They, had a large tent resembling an original and colourful Indian Teepee, with a hole at the top. The scouts and girl guides from, the USA, sent out messages to everyone nearby, using the old, but still very effective, smoke signals way of communication. They said, 'Who needs the Internet, Facebook and Twitter, when you can send messages and cook a meal on a fire at the same time'?

After looking at all of the great tents made by all of the participating nations, we sat down to eat. Everybody had made a favourite dish from their home country. All the girl guides from Australia made the famous and delicious dessert cake called, Pavlova. But, it wasn't any ordinary Pavlova, for it was in the shape of the very large outback rock named Uluru. Which, by the way, is located in the middle of Australia, near a place called Alice Springs.

So my mum's friend has a very famous name indeed. The girl guides from Australia named this creation, 'The Alice Springs Rock'.

The Egyptians had made a dessert out of shortbread, that took them hours to make. Each piece of shortbread had to be skilfully cut, with exact precision or the creation just wouldn't stay in place. It was named, 'Pastry Plate of Pharaoh's Perfect Pyramid'.

The Italian Boy Scouts, prepared a series of huge leaning pizzas stacked on top of each other, on very acute angles, just like their tent. They named their creation, 'The Leaning Tower of Pizza'.

The host nation of the USA, made some yummy hotdogs with tomato ketchup, mustard and cheese. They made the hotdogs, pop up from each end of the roll and placed wooden sticks on either side to look like American Native Indians were rowing their canoes.

Norway had created a tasty snack made with salmon and biscuits which looked like little boats flowing down the Fjords. Also the impression of large rocks in the water that were in fact meatballs for all.

Thailand had served up several spicy dishes, including the famous Pad Thai dish with chicken and the hot soup named Hot and Sour with Prawns in Thai you pronounce it as Tom Yung Goong. It was so yummy in the tummy the dishes from Thailand.

In the Brazil kitchen they made us their nations famous Churrasco or BBQ. It uses a variety of meats like pork, beef and chicken which was cooked on large metal skewers stuck into the ground and roasted with the embers of the charcoal.

France baked up some crescent shaped flaky pastry named the Croissant. They added some great tasting almonds to a few, while some others had dried fruits such as sultanas, raisins and even apples.

Holland had an assortment of plates consisting of Gouda and Edam cheeses with mayonnaise and mustards and other plates had a rich variety of fruits, freshly cut meats and nuts placed upon them.

Hong Kong had very traditional Chinese meals prepared for all to enjoy. They had everything from fried rice, to Chinese noodles to my dads all time favourite Peking Duck, so when he saw the duck he said he was in luck. Also they had a plate full of Dim Sums and a Hong Kong favourite snack called egg tarts and another of my dads favourite drinks named milk tea.

Finally England had whipped up my Friday night special, which is Fish n Chips with tomato sauce. It was so good that a lot of the other nations said they would make it for their families, once they got home.

In the morning we had such great fun and adventure while trying every nations favourite sport or recreation. We started by having team races on the river in Native American Indian canoes, Norwegian Viking ships, Italian Gondolas, Egyptian river boats and Chinese dragon boat races in the nearby river. The winning order was Hong Kong 1st, Italy came in 2nd and third of all was Egypt.

We even had competitions to see who could do the best smoke signals and we even had fun rope climbing events to the top of the Eiffel Tower, the Leaning tower of Pisa, and walking and climbing events up the Pyramid of Giza and the Sydney Harbour Bridge tents.

Then some countries had a football game after lunch with teams from Brazil, England, Italy and France playing for the Boy Scouts and Girl Guides World Cup golden trophy. Brazil beat England in the final 3-1, to hold up the golden cup.

Some other nations had bike riding races, which Holland won with ease. Australia did really well in the boxing competition. Everybody laughed when Smoochy came out 1st, wearing a pair of boxing gloves, before they brought out a plastic blow up of their mascot wearing gloves "Big Red" the boxing kangaroo which was placed near the ring for good luck.

Thailand dominated the Judo and the USA couldn't be stopped in the 100m sprints and also the mixed basketball matches. So overall, everyone had such a great time and we all loved the tents, food and different sports to watch and perform in, from all of the world.

The week went so fast and it was sad to say goodbye to all of our new friends from all over the world, but we promised that we would stay in touch either by using smoke signals or the new generations way, which is either by Facebook or Twitter.

I was trapped lured into lie by a clever evil mastermind .
Lost in a strange land locked away in a basement guarded by some twisted hamster on steroids known as a kangaroo.

Sure I had been tricked by evil means by the mastermind known as Helen hey look she told me there was a huge **** down in the basement with tons of strippers and ******* who wouldn't fall for that? Duh everyone knows you never let strippers in the good part of your house .

So here I was living in the basement like some sad nerd who probably posts on a web site everyday thinking they are totally awesome cause they have five hundred followers when in reality they'd be lucky if they had even one human friend in real life.

What ?
I was talking  about one of those star wars nerd sites cause everyone knows I'd never bash a site like Hello that is ruled by a evil cult leader who moved to the states after collecting money under guise to help the site when in reality it was for his *** change .

Yeah Id never pick on someone like that .
Frankly I'm hurt you'd think that  I'm kidding and as long as I'm breathing I will always be your favorite ruthless ******* slash ****** with a heart of gold.

I sat there in my new cell wondering just what the hell I was to do all the while kangaroo jack kept his beady little eyes locked onto me .
Yeah I knew he was sitting there mentally ******* me with his eyes I felt so naked course id probably feel better if I actually put some clothes on.
Duh who wears clothes at a **** *******?
Had I known this was all a lure I would have kept my clothes on and kept my trusty **** whistle and not got into this mess to begin with.

I was ready to scream for help when all the sudden I herd a sound .
Muffled as it was still I herd it the kangaroo hopped as it approached me oh dear lord man I was far to fragile to be assaulted by this weird *** overgrown rat .

The sound was so strange it sounded like the men at work song land from down under but where the **** was it coming from!
The Kangaroo was getting far to close it leaned over into my face and being a true man I did what any other true man would do.

Began to cry and beg this ****** up gerbil not to **** me.
Answer the ******* phone mate.
It said to me as I was stunned .

Hey ******* answer the ******* phone .
It said again  incase your to high or didn't read it the first time .
You ******* talk and what ******* phone I asked trying to hold back the tears let me tell you these animals were known killers they were like Canadians on crack with incredibly strong legs yeah imagine what nickel back could do with powers like these those heartless ******* would be unstoppable .


I was lost naked and afraid minus the camera crew and some ***** chick who smelled really bad and ******* at me for not having great hunting skills why not call that show what millions of people wearing clothes call it .
Marriage yeah now there's some scary ****!

Look **** for brains snap out of hit .
The kangaroo said as it kicked me upside the head .
Answer the ******* phone so we can get on with this story you *******.

I swear those kangaroos really had a mouth on them who knew such cute looking standing rabbit could be such a *******.

Okay so where the hells the phone and never kick me again you got it!?
I have no clue where your furry foots been.
Up your grandmas *** mate and where else would I keep my phone in my ******* pouch .

Look You can insult me how ever you like Gerbil but I'm not putting my hand in that pouch besides that is the oldest trick in the book you know how many times I fell for that with grandpa ?

What?

This steroid fed mouse asked as it looked at me like all other people and some who read this might think.
What the **** is wrong with me?

Yeah that's a whole other write in itself .

Answer the ******* phone in my pouch now *******!
Umm no .
Why not ?
Cause I don't want to .
Look you ***** if  I had long enough arms I would do it but I cant okay
you know how ****** up it is to have arms this short now you know why the T Rex was the most ******* dinosaur of them all .

Yeah I had to admit my new friend slash captor had a point imagine being a total badass that cant ******* boy that's some ****** up **** but enough with the foreplay hamsters.

After some back and fourth  debate I against great protest reached in this hopping *******'s pouch and found a cell phone .

Hello ?
Well Gonzo how you like your new digs mate?
I knew that voice anywhere .

Helen !

My friend turned evil super villain explained to me her evil plan to keep me hostage and force me to co write for eternity in this basement guarded twenty four seven by Ursula her trained evil kangaroo henchwoman .

It was clear all hope was lost how could I ever escape the clutches of such twisted evil?
Then it occurred to me I would simply bust the window in the basement and get the **** out of here .

I had to act fast cause it's almost happy hour at the bar kids and this hamster is thirsty.
  
Hey Ursula I really got to use the bathroom .
Well go ahead mate the toilets in the corner .

Yeah but you know I really like my privacy you know I mean I tell you those burritos are really talking back if you know what I mean but hey if you can stand the smell be my guest I mean sure the oder alone will strip the paint off the walls but I'm sure after you pass out from the fumes you will be fine.

Fine you stupid ******* just make it quick Ursula said as she bounced her grouchy *** upstairs .

It was my only shot and thank God they had left a trusty boomerang around so I could bust the window to make my escape its almost like it was planned that way being I'm writing the story.
No **** Sherlock!

I was free as a bird if a bird had a really bad drinking problem and twisted sense of humor and was totally naked .
I looked to the front gates but there was no way I could escape that way barbwire and flesh didn't mix that well besides without there draw bridge down the crocodiles would eat me alive yeah these Aussies were total freaks .

So like some naked ninja I made my way around Helens Compound of evil making my way upstairs I slipped into a room in hopes of finding just where my clothes had been taken to.

Hey help me .
I herd a mans voice say as I flipped  on the light to find a horrific scene a strange man chained to the wall no wonder this evil woman was such a prolific writer .

Hey mate help me please get me out of here .
I knew this woman was evil but after some deep discussion I learned this poor man trapped in this upstairs *** dungeon was secretly her husband  I know how weird who has there *** dungeon upstairs ?

I don't know what I'm going to do I'm never getting out of here Gonz .
I unchained my knew friend after he told me he knew how to find a way out of here and after finding my clothes and grabbing my trusty case of bourbon we put on some music caught a killer buzz and totally forgot  why we were trying to escape the clutches of evil to begin with.

The party was great we laughed we cried we watched some really freaky homemade movies once only made me love my knew Aussie brother more Shawn was ******* awesome a bit of a freak but ******* awesome.

The party was going full swing when the doors few open and there she was my evil long lost sister Helen and her demented *** evil henchwoman  slash house pet kangaroo Ursula who although a animal had some great legs I have to admit .


The gigs up Gonz it's off to the basement with you forever !
I looked at my new best friend thought about how sad he was when I found him and thought of the great times we could have roaming the wasteland looking for gasoline like in mad max just being totally drunk instead.

Yeah then Helen yelled in her outside voice inside and bout made me **** myself so I said **** this and left my brother behind and hauled ***  

I made it to the kitchen but was trapped by Helen and her evil **** minion .

Give it up Gonz  Helen said .
At that moment I grabbed a knife .

Oh cut the crap Gonz stop being silly what are you going to do with that ?

She thought she had me but I had one last trick up my sleeve .

I opened the fridge and grabbed her trusty box of wine
You ******* don't you dare hurt my baby!

Yeah you want this back I said as walked forward and out of the kitchen towards the veranda .

You get back Helen or I swear the box of wine gets it.

Oh  yeah you stab that box then I will drop this fifth of your bourbon over the rail Helen said with that devilish look in her eyes.

You heartless ***** !
She dropped the bottle I swear it cried daddy as it fell to the ground shattering to a million pieces on the concreate beside the pool wow I had to admit she really had a nice place.

I mean sure she was twisted evil heartless had a awesome husband she kept in a upstairs *** dungeon but enough about Helens  good quality's  .

I looked as my pour bottle lay shattered upon the floor  .
I laughed you know that wasn't my only bottle .

I know that mate then reached to Ursula grabbing yet another bottle from her pouch dam you Australia why must you have so many ****** up animals in one place its like a zoo on crack.

Helen went to drop yet another bottle over the rail when I cracked.
Okay enough!
I will put your box of wine down just don't hurt the bottle okay .

Deal mate Helen replied .

We both slowly put are true passions in life down .
I'm glad you could see things my way Gonz now time for you to get writing .

Yeah Helen I don't think so I said pulling the trusty boomerang from a location I rather not disclose hey I been to prison before you be surprised the stuff people smuggle in.
Dam that hurt.!


I threw the boomerang with all my might this was my one truly  last chance at getting out of here.
But like some Aussie ninja Helen just ducked the thing  as  it flew past her head went flying around the house and turned direction coming straight towards me hitting me in the skull.

As I fell to my death music played as I took that long dramatic one story fall .
I hit the pavement like Lindsey Lohans career.

I laid there broken my new best friend speaking to me no gonz don't leave me we could have are own spinoff if only you didn't die .
Shawn my brother I will never forget you but I have just one last thing to say to you are you listening .

Yes mate I am.

And at that moment of dire sadness I ripped the biggest **** .
Shawn busted up laughing as above Helen looked at Ursula
Men are so ******* disgusting .

And later as they all sat looking down upon me from the veranda Helen furious at her man slaves betrayal told her partner in crime slash killer kangaroo .

Ursula go fetch the battery out of the car and the ****** clamps someone is going to be punished .
Shawn's face lit up with joy yay he exclaimed .
Helen shoot him a look .

I mean oh no such horror please don't torture me mistress   .
But hey don't judge them there not freaks there Australian.

Ursula shook her head as she made her way to fetch the car battery .
Jesus Christ why couldn't I have been Mel Gibson's pet.

Helen looked down one last time at her dead brothers body .
But to her surprise he was   gone .
The dramatic Halloween music played as Shawn looked to his evil temptress slash wife .

Mistress was that the boogeyman?

She slapped the **** outta him **** no its just that lovable perverted misspelling ***** across the water everyone calls Gonzo.

She shook her head and laughed to herself .
We will meet again my friend .


Until next time kids or Helen finds and actually kills
me stay crazy.

Gonz

If you do come to Australia
don't think just of the kangaroo--also the dugong
the koala, the platypus, the wombat and the Tasmanian Devil
and learn to sing Waltzing Matilda the nation's most-loved song

far superior to  Advance Australia Fair (believe me)
our uninspiring national anthem (most Aussies would agree)
and the lyrics were so badly
written-- no wonder Aussies could never sing the song properly

My Muse had a strange concept,
Aussies could spread Test cricket,
Global peace from this precept,
Middle East with a new diversion,
Test Cricket's mesmerising stupefaction,
No shots daily, narcotic absorption,
"Resume hostilities at the end of the next over..."
They'll say, "New bowler's called Grover.
We'll see if he bowls a maiden over."
Large LED screens on constant display,
Test Cricket, Ashes every day,
Hours sitting in the hot sun, that's the way,
That's why there's Peace in Australia,
Without Test Cricket, Peace is a failure!
Yes, Aussies could preach Test Cricket,
My muse and its weird concepts!

JANUARY, THE TIME OF YEARS OF ASH, BASH THE BALL, AND NET COURTS






YA SEE EVERY TIME JANUARY COMES,, WE GET MIXED MESSAGES

THERE IS ALWAYS SOMEONE BASHING PEOPLE UP

AND THERE IS ALWAYS A LOT OF ASH WHERE BUSHFIRES MUST BE

YA SEE BUSHFIRES ARE ALWAYS IN JANUARY, BECAUSE IT’S SO ****** **** HOT

AND THE CRICKET, WELL THE AUSSIES ARE WINNING

AND INDIA, ARE DEFINATELY NOT

YA SEE MEN HAVE THEIR BEERS IN THE ESKY, OH ****** BETCHA DO

AND LLEYTON HEWIT LOST YESTERDAY, BOO HOO BOO HOO BOO HOO

I DID A RAIN DANCE, WHICH BROUGHT A THUNDERSTORM TO ADELAIDE

I HOPE, A LOT OF YOU DUDES, THINK OF HOLDING COOL STUFF

TO RAISE THE AMOUNT OF MONEY NEEDED

YA SEE, I AM WILLING TO ATTEND ANY EVENT NEAR ME, AND GIVE DONATIONS

OH YEAH, THAT IS SO COOL

YOU SEE, DUDES, I WAS YOUR SAVIOUR, CRONUS DID IT AGAIN

FORCED, THE FIRE TO GET UNDER CONTROL

THANKS FOR MY LITTLE RAIN DANCE


UMMMMMMMM IT WILL RAIN UMMMMMM IT DID RAIN, UMMMMMM I AM GLAD MY COSMOS OPLAN WORKED

UMMMMMMM THEY NEED $13,000,000, PLEASE DONATE UMMMMMM PLEASE DONATE

OR HOLD VARIOUS SOCIAL GATHERINGS IN YOUR AREA, PLEASE GIVE GENENEROUSLY

I HELPED A POOR MAN WHO WAS SLEEPING ON THE CEMENT IN THE CANBERRA CBD

ASND HE WAS ASLEEP, SO I THREW $2 HIS WAY, FOR A DRINK OR FRUIT OR WHATEVER HE WANTED

I WANT TO BUILD A HOMELESS HOTEL, I CAN’T HELP IT, I FEEL SORRY FOR PEOPLE LIKE HIM

I GIVE MONEY, WHEN I CAN I STRESS WHEN I CAN, TO POOR PEOPLE

SO THEY CAN HAVE A LIFE TOO, BUT I STRESS, WHEN I CAN, I DON’T WANT TO BE AN EAST TARGET

WE ALWAYS HAVE BUSH FIRES IN JANURAY, I AM GLAD I DID THAT RAIN DANCE TO HELP

NOW, I KNOW, THERE MIGHT BE TROUBLES, BUT MY MATE STEVE SAID TO ME, **** HAPPENS

I MEAN THIS IN THE NICEST POSSIBLE WAY

I AM CRONUS, BUT I AM HUMAN, I CAN’T SAVE EVERYONE RELIGIOUSLY, BUT YA CAN ****** WELL TRY

CAUSE HELPING PEOPLE, HELPS THE FUTURE GET BRIGHT, YOU HAVE TO WEAR SHADES

I STUDIED MESSIAH SCIENCE, AND I LIKED THOSE CLASSES

I WAS A BIG FAT MAN WHO WORE GLASSES

WE WATCHED NEWS, BUT ONLY WIN

AND STAND UP COMEDY, AND BECKER AND FOOTY AND HEAPS OF OTHER COOL THINGS

HE TAUGHT ME A LOT ABOUT BEING TREATED LIKE A PERSON

AND I COOKED DINNER, LIKE A PERSON

YA SEE I STUDIED MESSIAH SCIENCE, I LOVED THOSE CLASSES

I KNOW FROM THAT, I LEARNT HOW TO REALLY HELP THE POOR, AND UNDERSTAND

THEY NEED MORE C ARE, OH DEARY ME, WHAT AN ACTORS LIFE FOR ME

I WILL BRING THE NEW YEAR TIGER INTO TELEVISION

HE’S ON AAA YOUTUBE TV AND AARON CLAYTON

YEAH. AUSTRALIA LOOKS SET TO WIN CRICKET, TENNIS IS NOT AS PROMISING FOR THE AUSSIES

AND I DID A BUDDHIST RAIN DANCE, TO CALM THE SA BUSHFIRES

I AM RADICALLY AWESOME, DUDES

Can anarchy have empathy?
Yes, in our land of Aussies,
We say no wucking furries,
Always more snags on the barbie,
Still listen to a bit of Acca Dacca,
More burgers and fries from Maccas,
Frocked up in trackie dakkies,
Yes, it's the land of Aussies,
Our form of anarchy has empathy!

This is the game, set and matching end-piece to what is known as:

http://hellopoetry.com/poem/385266/poetry-round-find-your-self-within/

by way of an introduction....

T'is season to move forward,
back to old acquaintances renewed,
sand, water and salty sun,
three lifelong friends who,
Auld Lang Syne,
never ever forget me

I get drunk on their eternity,
their celestial beauty,
and they, upon my tarnished earthly being,
muse and are bemused

unreservedly and never judgingly,
share shards of inspiration unstintingly,
we share, never measuring
this captain's humanity, his human efficacy,
by mystical formulae of reads or hearts

grains of sand, water wave droplets and sun rays,
and his beloved words, derived there from,
all only know one measure...
immeasurable
http://hellopoetry.com/poem/699991/adieu-my-crew-my-crew/
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Pilgrimage (Reunion)


at last to begin,
to begin the 'at last,'
this reunion occurs
this first day of June
where on my
body's flesh colored calendar,
X red-marked,
deeper than any real cut of despair


this morn, leave for familiar parts,
embarking 100 steps to that
Adirondack chair,
my name, my self,
(oh god at long last)
so often, long lovingly
revealed unto you


the garden's sundial welcomes me,
Prince, Guardian, of the gate to the green,
the green steppe way to bay and beach,
a brief song of "ring around the irises,"
blooming around him,
he issues,
to celebrate his own glory recalled,
his own purpled prosed long ago one ecrivez'd,
by having the third mate
ring the greened worn,
bronzed ship bell
upon conclusion of
his raising of the gate


shorts and T white hair shirt,
costume de rigueur
of this Peconic pilgrimage,
turban and baseball uncapped,
stepping humbly
toward that worn wood throne
where carved are
the initials of
my poetic friends,
and his vast modest,
Concordia of poetic essays


Those odd disordered
collection of aleph bets
that have been prepared for this hour,
are sun dappled,
breeze caressed,
wave watched,
a fresh redressing after a
dum hiems,
a long dark winter


all rise up welcoming with voices
tremulous yet oratory,
sing with a love so spectacular ,
Handel's Messiah Hallelujah Chorus,
au naturel


the armies of ants declare this a
Truce Day,
parading before me in formation,
the rabbits race
in elegant uniforms,
white tailed bemedaled, dress grays,
announcing their  showoff arrival
with a new across-the-lawn
land speed record


the dear **** deer,
familiar families and generational,
look upon this human and
grumble while chewing our shrubbery,
an act of sherwooded lawn high robbery
but perforce acknowledging our entrance,
by uttering a Balaam blessing/curse,
a neutralized
"****, they're back"


the seagulls on the dock,
sovereign state observers from
Montauk and the far island city,
sent by the mother winds superior,
observers and reporters to nature everywhere,
Summer Season of Man Has Begun


a few white wakes disturb the water's composure,
the early low arc'd sun has not peaked in strength,
at 10:00am, the temp just breaches 60 Fahrenheit,
the beach sand untrod, no unlasting human impressions,
no children's red pails yet to them decorate,
amidst the sea life's detritus and smooth licked pebbles


Enough.


each tree ring and grass blade demands a verse,
an all my own tributary accolade,
this too much to accommodate


a year ago I issued an invitation,
do so again for my word is my bond
my responsibilities, my *******,


there are chairs for all
on my righted round and my motet left,
here, there are
no Americans,
no Canadians,
no Aussies or Brits,
or Indians and Fillipinos,
no African or Asians present,
East nor West,
None Invited here,
Only Poets


even those hardy pioneer
West Coasters, a proud lot,
and my Southern family drawling,
and perhaps lessening the mourning
just a touch, a minute modicum,
all sit quiet in the admixture
of poets come to celebrate
the blessing to have been tasked,
to write from and of places we visit
in the cerebral,
and to imbibe each other's words


Three Hundred and Sixty Four Days ago,
I wrote :

We sit together in spirit, if not in body,
You join me in the Poet's Nook,
A few frayed and weathered Adirondack chairs
Overlooking the Peconic Bay,
Where inspiration glazes over the water,
And we drown happily in a sea of words...

I am exhausted.
So many gems (poets)
to decorate
My body, my soul

I must stop here,
So many of you have reached out,
none of you overlooked.

Overwhelmed, let us sit together now
And celebrate the silence that comes after the
Gasp, the sigh, that the words have taken from
Our selves, from within.

Once again, in your debt

Again,
I await your beckoning wave of hello,
greet you in your mellifluous native tongue,
iced drinks at the ready,
the opening ceremony already started,
when all are seats taken
we commence officially,
with a blessed

*"Now, let us begin"

It was good to have Lumb in the side,
South African birthright aside!
  Though we must be fair,
  Shane Warne got him there,
He smashed all the bowlers with pride.

Our bowlers used plenty of thought,
Even Broad who often dropped short,
  He did it with style,
  And showed us his guile,
And everything hit up was well caught.

The Aussies expected to chin us,
They didn't think we had it within us
  In that final meeting
  We gave them a beating.
England the T-20 Winners.

We made them look like beginners,
Or old forgotten dog's dinners,
  The Aussies got thrashed,
  Their bowling was smashed.
*England are T-20 winners!

THE TRUMP CHRONICLES WILL BE
A VERY BEST SELLER FOR SURE
50 POEMS ON THE RISE OF TRUMP
CONTROVERSY INTRIGUE AND MORE


THE AMERICAN PRESS WILL BE OVERWHELMED
ON AN AUSSIES POETS VIEW
THE AMERICAN PEOPLE MAY NOT AGREE
THE BOOK WILL NEED A REVIEW


BUT ONE THING IS FOR SURE
THE TRUMP PRESIDENCY WILL CHANGE THE WORLD
AND PUT US ON A DIFFERENT TRACK

SO LETS HOPE AMERICA WILL STAY FOCUSED
AND PREVENT A WORLD ATTACK

i am a happy happy happy dude

if you say i am not happy your being rude

cause i am a happy happy happy dude

every single day of the year

computer people can be happy too yeah yeah yeah mate yeah

i am a happy happy happy dude

i can’t stand negative *****

cause even in times i don’t look happy

i am the happiest dude around

happy happy happy dude, as i do my art

my art makes the world really positive

and that is what i try to be

fruit salad yummy yummy

right now for my tummy

people who tease me are negative *****

who use their big boy power to get what he wants

cause i am happy individual; as happy as can be

i don’t have a job but i still am so happy

if your happy and you know it do a ****

if your happy and you know it do a ****

if your happy and you know it

and i rather stop bothering me

cause i am a positive person every day

come on negative and truthful ***** show us your cool side

partying is only for positive people like me

if your happy and you know it do a ****

if your happy and you know it do a ****

if your happy and you know it, and negative ***** should *******

away from me, with their negativity

cause i am a positive dude, better than being all rude

i hate you if your negative, ya stupid old loomarri

i am so positive, i am really positive

the messiah is the messiah of death

and i am the king of living life

yummy yummy yummy i got love in my tummy

i think that saying i am a bigger boy is negative

and i am positive, really really positive

dad a tad negative until he grew old, but he still believes in fighting

i don’t believe in violence i am too positive for that

i believe in being nice to everyone we meet

come on aussies be positive like brian allan

come on buddhists be positive like brian allan

the messiah teases like a negative ****,, AND I AM NOT NEGATIVE

I AM EVER SO POSITIVE, NEVER BE NEGATIVE IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO BRIAN ALLAN

I CAN’T STAND IT, dudes

Tucking Dostoyevsky’s
Crime and Punishment
into the bedside cabinet
of the cheap

Paris hotel
having cleaned
the greasy sink
and bidet

you walked out
on the street
breathing in
the Parisian air

smelling the perfume
of the restaurants
on the side walks
seeing the sights

taking photographs
as memoirs
drinking the wines
and beers

and that fish
with eyes still there
putting you off
you tried to get out

of the cheap cafe
but paid for the meal
you couldn’t eat
the fish eye

gazing up at you
dead eye
battered fish
and the Left Bank

and night
and you taking in
the sights and lights
and those ******

sitting in windows
like gifts
to have wrapped
but not take home

or the **** films
you never
went to see
in those cinemas

you just walked by
or the Eiffel Tower day
right to the top
the view splendid

the sight historical
or those rides
on the Metro
riding the wrong carriages

looking out
for the train inspector
pretending to be Aussies
giving it the yak

and later
in your hotel room
taking out
Dostoyevsky

and entering
the Russian world
of ****** and deceit  
and being followed

you imagined
by the detective
looking out
onto the Parisian street

from the open window
of your room
gazing at street corners
and shadows  

or remembering
that French girl
in the cafe
who served you

with bright eyes
black and white dress
and white apron
the fine long legs

and wiggling behind
recalling the old priest
who once said
too much ***
will make you blind.

they are treating goodes like ****, just because he speaks up for himself

you see people tell him off or call him monkey or anything else like that

and he is copping that much flack,

why does anyone do something like that to a great player like him

he is better than any player that has ever strapped on a boot

and it would be a shame to have him leave the game like this

i know they are just using biff, and they think it’s alright

but Goodes is the best player that has ever played for the mighty swans

i love the swans like it’s my life, and i love life

you see i will party with no man who hates Adam Goodes

the fiucken racist ****** they are, i don’t want to get fought over that

because i like people being nice to one another

cheer cheer Adam Goodes is the best

he can put the other teams right to the test

he will lift up his ****** banner high

right to the centre of the sky

what are the odds of Goodes getting treated right

by those stupid Melbourne ites

lift up your banner so high

and shake down the thunder from the sky


sydney sydney sydney

goodesy goodesy goodesy

why are people racist *****

i haven’t any idea, no why get ******

please treat Goodes with respect

because his origin founded this land

and let his loyal hand stand high

onward to victory

Immigrants THIS And Immigrants THAT ... !!!
    
All This Government Talk's Helping Hatred SOAR ... !!!!!    
      
Meantime They KEEP ON ... !!!!!    
Making Plans And Setting ... "TRAPS" ... !!!    
      
We've Already Been Fed THE …. ” Internet "….    
      
Now It's ... " TV SHOWS " …    
Where CASH Is The GOAL .... !!!!!    
      
“For a cheap rate call,    
you could earn yourself, a cash windfall !”    
      
I Suppose They're Designed ...    
By … " IMMIGRANT MINDS " … !?!    
      
Take A Minute And ……….. ” THINK ” …………..    
Because Immigrants AREN'T The ... " WEAKEST LINK ” ... !!!!!    
      
Many Immigrants Yup DO NEED A Shrink …..    
Because of LIES And ... " Colonial Tricks " ... !!!    
      
” So Let’s Get This Straight !!?!! ”    
      
It's Okay To ... " ENSLAVE " … !!?!!  
      
But When It Comes To IMMIGRANTS ...    
Who ... USE THEIR BRAINS ... !!!!!!    
We're Deemed To Be A Waste of Space … ?!?    
      
And Like The ... ” INSANE ” ...    
Should Join The CRIMINALS And Be LOCKED AWAY ... ?!?    
      
Okay That's Cool ... !!!    
But Let Me Air MY VIEW ... !!!!!    
      
Immigrants Who Choose To Break Life's Rules …..    
Are A DANGER TO ME Like They Are To ... YOU ... !!!!    
      
I Believe They SHOULD BE LOCKED UP TOO … !!!!!!!!    
      
But DON’T Just .......................................... Ignore ... !!!    
Suited GENTLEMEN Who Keep Passing Laws ...    
That Are CLEARLY FLAWED And Cause PROBLEMS ... !!!    
      
It's EASY TO ATTACK ...
New Immigrant HOARDS … !!!    
Instead of Knocking On Doors ...
of The COMMONS or The LORDS ... !!!    
      
And Doors Where Men Make ….. ” INVESTMENTS ” …..    
For Themselves AND Their RICH FRIENDS … !!!!!    
      
I’m An IMMIGRANT Well ... The Son of One ... !!!    

Who Broke NO LAWS ...      
As Far As I Know ABSOLUTELY NONE ... !!!!!!!!!!!!!    
But He's Still A SECOND CLASS Citizen ... !!!    
      
He's A Man of Medicine ...    
Whose Wife Was A TEACHER And A Nurse ... !!!    
    
In Other Words A WORKING Mum ... !!!!!    
      
Until SICKNESS  … Reduced Her Fitness ... !!!    
      
See Some Immigrants Are FAR From DUMB ... !!!!!    
We're NOT ALL Criminals On The RUN …………………. !!!!!    
      
I DON'T Give A **** About WHAT YOU SAY ……      
Who The Hell Are The English ... ANYWAY … !!???!!    
      
A Breed Who PREYED On IMMIGRANT SLAVES ... ??!!!??    
To Bring Them Here For A ... Minimum Wage … !!!    
And To TOLERATE ... IGNORANT Race Hate ... !!!!!    
      
While Aristocrats KEEP HOLD of CASH ... !!!!!    
And KEYS TO CHAINS From COLONIAL Days … ?!?!?    
      
“Ahhhh but that’s okay !    
Old boy, I say, these darkies' still have got no shame !    
Let’s flush them down the drain again !”    
      
Well I Have To Say They've Got A CHEEK … !!!!!    
To Sit And Complain When The Home Office Seems …    
To Have Made Mistakes With Immigrants They …    
SHOULD OF ... "LOCKED Away" ... !!!?!!!    
      
And What About Those of Different Strains …    
South Africans, Aussies And Americans ... PLEASE ... !!!    
Let Me Take A Guess They're ALL Crime Free ... !?!    
      
Can Someone PLEASE Explain To Me How This CAN BE ... !???!    
      
When Those Who Are of The DIPLOMAT CLASS ...    
REFUSE To Pay The … “ Congestion Charge ” ... !!!!!!    
      
And There Seems To Be A RISE In Afrikaaner' Bars …..    
And The Aussies DON'T Seem To Have Gone TOO FAR … !!?!!    
      
It's Okay For THEM To Be ….. IMMIGRANTS  ….. !!?!!    
Because In Truth They're REALLY ENGLISHMEN !!!!!    
So Why Were They Sent From ... ENGLISH Prisons … ?!?    
      
Are They NOT DESCENDANTS of CRIMINAL Men .. ?!?    
      
MURDERERS, RAPISTS And ******* TYPES ...  !!!!?!!!!    
      
Who Knows What They've Done To Australias' Sheep .... !?!    
... Aussie Immigrants England CAN KEEP ... !!!!!    
      
I’m JOKING Folks Just Like Mr. Manning And J.D. ...      
Jim Davidson Remember ... " CHALKY ” … !!!!!    
      
So DON'T Even TRY To Pick FIGHTS WITH ME ... !!!    
You NEED TO CHECK Your  … ” Hisss-Story ” … !!!!!!!!    
      
From COMEDY To INDUSTRY …..    
To Simply Walking English Streets ... !!!!!!    
And Let's NOT SPEAK About … " POLICE " … !!!!    
      
If We're Not ATTACKED You Claim To Like Blacks ...    
But Then Call Us Names Behind Our Backs ... ?!?    
      
That's How Things Are ... !!!!    
And In MY OPINION This Is FACT ... !!!!!    
      
Which Is Why IT SEEMS The Record IS .... STUC- KKK .……………………………………….    
Back On That Track …… OF ………….    
      
" IMMIGRANTS THIS And IMMIGRANTS THAT... "

Let us imagine, we write together!

You come for a visit,
From Germany, the Philippines, Singapore,
India, Nepal, even from industrial Leeds,
Bring me some Aussies and some Kiwis,
Green Tennessee, Nevada City (Ca?), the Canadian Plains
Hampshire & Haverford, where the H's get lost,
Even London, where everything is pensive expensive!
Cannot forget Minnesota, hotbed of poets restless.
If you are crosstown, let's meet on the Great Lawn in
Central Park, by Shakespeare's castle,
Let us turn my, now our, town into a belle-ville!

Side by side,
Stride for stride,
Manhattan, we connive
As our source, spring waters
For inspiration.

You come to me not as tourist,
But as explorer.

Ever-after twenty blocks,
Movement ceased, halted,
The mile, approximately travelled,
We then stop-sit.

Park bench, museum steps, bus stop,
Street curb, ok ok, Starbucks!

We each write a poem.
Exchange fluid words.

No proceeding until each have
Completed composing.
That's the rule.

A poem per mile.

I see this lovely island,
As home,
The sidewalk cracks, my veins,
The harshest of noises, my siren harmonies,
The dirt, my soul food.

But you, fresh eyes for me to
Discover what's been missed, for
Familiarity breeds cataracts,
Clouds the visionary.

I need you beside me
To be my teacher
To see my city
Anew.

About time,
I've paid my dues I've crossed the line,
This moment I thought would never come,
Is in my grasp, the deed now done.

Don't get me wrong, I loved my Mum,
But all that passed would surely stun
Even a saint or the Lord above,
So tiring being an aimless dove.

Now I'm ready to take the world by storm,
Show them my worth, no longer act forlorn,
The wife I always wanted by my side,
I can finally get into my Kingly stride.

The Little ****** that remains,
Harry's willful character that pains,
I've summoned experts to hear what they might say
To finally obtain a sample of his mysterious DNA.

I'm not claiming he's not mine,
But as Americans would shout, ‘I wouldn't bet a dime’,
Thank goodness I've got my other boy,
A stand-up chap that brings me nothing but pure joy.

As to Camilla, my soulmate from the start,
From whom they never could tear me far apart,
She now stands by me as my Queen,
You saw me beam with joy like a lovestruck teen.

Don't get me wrong,
I'm painfully aware my reign may not be long,
But while I'm here, I plan to make my mark,
Understanding this job is no cakewalk in the park.

I've got the Aussies wanting to jump ship.
The Canadians on their own perennial trip,
The Scots plotting for a Clansman King,
And Parliament seeking me do next to nothing.

Yet I've got a plan,
Something that will surely stun,
Become a multimedia star,
And thus take them all across the bar.

I can jig, dance and sing,
Fly helicopters, do pretty much of anything,
Plant trees, help save our World
How can all of this be thought absurd.

Politicians just blow smoke,
Send their countries near flat broke,
I instead bring Billions in
Collecting smiles from wheresoever I have been.

That said let me enjoy my moment in the sun,
Reflecting on all that's been and done,
My resolve is firm, my duty clear,
My life's work is aimed at all, both far and near.

So rest easy, enjoy the ride,
Sailing smoothly on a flowing tide,
Over a thousand years in the making
My oath is one of giving and not taking.

Plane Poetry: I go to Barber*

aisle seat C 14,
an emergency exit row,
forced to solemnly swear
that for the extra legroom,
I will solemnly assist to open
the exit door, me first as my reward,
and keep my terrified screaming
below an elephant's trumpeting mating call

what hast this to do with a trip to Barber?

you Brits and Aussies, ever economical,
say went 'to hospital,'
leaving we Ameddicans
to dignify that august institution
as going to
The Hospital

Thus advised, be apprised, a
Nota Bene Benidictus:

I go to Barber,
Not
I go to the barber.

Samuel Barber,
Adagio for String Quartet, Barber

If unfamiliar with this piece,
you will recall it well
if "Apocalypse Now" registers at all

If not stop immediately,
return to Go,
start here,

www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRMz8fKkG2g


be prepared to surrender your mortality,
listen and if effected,
if you find yourself on your knees
weeping, recalling the days of loss,
the early empires of hope,
the first kiss
of your firstborn
and unknowingly,
the last you gave
a loved one

if you have the courage to
be touched and impacted,
as I,
then welcome back to
right here where why...

I go to Barber
where violins soar me heavenwards,
where violins rip open sores long since scarred over,
I go to Barber
and float, eyes sky'd, as water
fills and departs my body simultaneously,
I go to Barber
to know that art can rise beyond,
that my weakened, wrecked human flesh, surpassable  
I go to Barber
to harmonize my disconcordia,
romantic lyricisize my waning days,
I go to Barber
to voluntary confess, admit my impoverishment,
to acknowledge that they, my days, yet are capable,
I go to Barber
to remember and to forget,
to mark and unmark time
I go to Barber
to be created and recreated,
to be destructed and despaired
I go to Barber
to acknowledge, as human, better is forever possible,
for of the god spark, yet unextinguished
I go to Barber
because there is no plane as fast as his slow adagio,
to transport me to the who I am and should yet be

It'll all be over in about eight minutes,
Give or take, depending on your side of the Earth,
Plasma therapy for the masses.
Just like that, we're all crispy critters,
Pork rind skins flavored with dehydrated sea-salt.
That beautiful aurora-generating magnetosphere,
Shrinking daily, as the planet's poles reverse,
Will puncture like a too thin prophylactic.
The Christians will have just minutes,
Reminding us that we were prophesized
To all go out in fire and overlooking
That we're actually being ionized with radiation ---
A mere trifle to the True-Believers.
Will the Dow-Jones sell off in those final moments?
Will the Russians attempt to launch a Soyuz?
The Brits will take it all in stride with another pint;
Aussies venture on their final walkabout.
As for me, I'm gonna saddle up a pony
heading straight out to greet the Joshua trees.
I want to meet annihilation on my own terms.

you know one thing i hated as a kid, is not being included, because every kid

wants to be included, i love life, i love to PARTY, i love being normaL I hate nothing

nothing at all, you see i had this friend named patrick back in those days, and he

never yelled at me, i hear him  yelling at me  in my head, but that is the cosmos, you

see i tried to be like him, because he helped me more than anyone else, took me to jimmy barnes

concerts, and i liked him, and he took me to nye parties, and we certainly partied all night

even when i crashed over his house, cause i didn’t want to show dad how ****** i was, pat

never yelled like a *****, but i turned out to be a ***** in the end, because i had too much

creative energy i had to get rid of, and i was a ****, until i started seeing carers, they have all

helped me by making me understand that he ain’t my daddy, but i still wanted to see him

but i have to realise, we are adults now, and we have to grow up, when i am watching chris rock

i am hearing nonsense voices of my mates hating black people but i learnt from the messiah that

black people are good comedians and good athletes, there is a lot of knowledge in black people

more so than in white people, blacks are struggling day in and day out, while us whites get it easy

and i am saying patrick was the nicest white person i have ever met after meeting a few aussies at

the cricket, i liked patrick back then because he helped me understand a bit about my family, to whom

i used to get cranky with, well, mainly he was showing me what my family was doing with them, ya know

the other kids, anyway, i have no ideas what patrick is doing now, but i hope he is working in a top high class job

because i am an artist, and writer and youtube entertainer, when i go to bed, i ain’t like canary bird, and i ain’t

a koomarri man, i just fall asleep on the bed with the radio on to keep me company, and when i yell at my voices

i am basically saying, i AM THE BIG PARTY PERSON, I PROVIDE PARTIES FOR ALL, i have moved out now

so come on DUDES, because going out is fun, patrick taught me that, my head is saying, he didn’t wanna do that

because i don’t like yelling at people, i prefer if i yell, i yell at the cosmos, because bailey from the show NEIGHBOURS

‘when he yelled, he looked like a CRAZY person, making the man say ‘YOU’RE CRAZY BAILS’ and that man who said

that told bailey he was crazy, reminded me of patrick, in the way of saying, patrick was a very nice person, he didn’t have to yell

if i meet patrick again, i will explain i am an artist and writer and youtube ****** and then i will tell patrick, i have always liked the computer

it’s just that i like going out having fun too, i have been thrown out of houses or flats, but patrick never did, so that makes him

number 1, out of school chums who i mucked with at school, and i like the joke by chris rock, men can’t go backwards sexually while

women can’t go backwards in lifestyle, i know we said imagine what lylle would do, here, imagine what lyle would, there, imagine

what lyle would in any place, yeah mate yeah, i am cool, i remember playing heavy metal music loud with patrick, as well and playing

basketball as well,  now patrick, whether he liked christmas or not, he still put his xmas tree up, i can tell you one thing though, i am

a buddhist who loves christian holidays, and i had fun teasing the old army men, who fought and died for this country, you see

this year is the 100 th year of gallipoli, and it’s an oldie thing to tease with music now, because young army codgers are in it

to be there for their country, patrick is a heavy metal ******, mainly liking jimmy barnes and me, as cronus put dad in barnesy’s family

as his little granddaughter betty, so dad, the old army codger from way back can learn the nice parts of jimmy barnes

i remembered patrick singing when your love is gone, and i liked him singing it, but i was looking at his legs, i was CRAZY

because i shouldn’t look at people’s legs, i am not gay, i am a man with problems, i have changed from all that nonsense of my minds past

i am now the new and improved brian allan, but i realise that patrick might not like me saying this, but he helped me, by not getting cranky AT me

i just want to make peace with my good mate, opatrick, because, he might have been ******* with my criime

and because of that crime, and because he was nice, when i saw he was cranky, i left him to head down the mall to be big bad brian

and the best way to get a guy over to a girl’s house, is put a ***  on the stove and you will have every man breaking down your door

you see, i was hearing crazy teasing in my head, and patrick’s voice was saying, is he trying to be like mr allan, i thought he was trying

to be like us, tease him, fight him, bully him around, and patrick still doesn’t know that channel 9’s karl stefanovic reminded me of patrick’s cool kid

to my mind but i have to tread to carefully there because patrick might have been trying to be like craig from kingswood country, he might hate

karl stefanovic, it’s just he reminded me of patrick, what is wrong with visions, pat might hate karl stefanovic, well his cool kid does anyway

and my cool kid is ***** hogan and sam marshall, patrick is a young dude figure

Writing in HP today from Melbourne

End of spring, hot weather makes its unpleasant appearance--heat will consume Aussies for 3 months. Old people in poor health are vulnerable and some would die--common knowledge. Bush-fire warnings. Black Friday would be long remembered--many were killed and Queen Elizabeth sent her condolences to the mourning nation. A few arsonists caught nearly every year!

The beaches will be crowded--Down Under has wonderful beaches.  Bare-chested females will attract curious eyes of males, especially the young ones'
(I am an old man but casting a look costs nothing and my wife doesn't mind the least--she would say--Your eyes might fall off if you gaze too long!). But I love to look at the kids playing on the beach or dipping their feet in the water.  How avidly do they look for pebbles
and shells!  Mothers' shouting---Kids, don't venture too far--wear your hats! We have the largest incidence of melanoma  Couples rest under coloured umbrellas (the stalls that lease these make good money!)--we are a nation of beer-drinkers and our pubs with history dating to the early 1800's ! Billions spent on grog--we produce great wine (thanks to nature and the pioneer-growers and wine-makers from Europe)--foreign tourists must visit our vine-yards and wineries--they would not regret--great restaurants
exist alongside, mostly owned by the winery-owners.  A$ 50 to 60 pp
starter, main and wine of your choice but sadly no music...

How dreadful is our transportation system! Not the place to discuss this. Sydney has a quick tram to the airport but we poor long-suffering Melburnians  have been left out--yesterday the authorities announced--work will begin within A DECADE--****** off, I would be long dead!  50% of trams to where I live don't have air-con (we use the term Air) and I dread travelling to the city--I don't have a driving-licence--tests are very demanding--one woman took 60 times over 30 years and failed--true story!

Don't wear flowers on your hair when you come to Australia--Aussies aren't romantic people--too frank, abrasive, caustic (not all), with
dry humour, they love to swear, women included, everyone is a mate
(pronounced as MITE), BTW, English is quite out of date here-
we have our own lingo--Stringe....unique in the English-speaking world... Newspaper editors should take English tests-
its (the genitive case) is written it's; in REGARDS** to, spectacular? fire for ferocious--people die in fires--what's so spectacular?
don't know the word schadenfreude?,  forecasted??? (business news),
I shouldn't go own lest I weep....

don't read sonnets to Aussies--don't talk literature or philosophy-
talk about beer, footy, the bets on horses, they dislike the intellectual-
everyone is MITE, FAIR DINKUM, LARRIKIN....

We have a national anthem-ADVANCE AUSTRALIA FAIR with tune that's un-singable and lyrics so bad that you would spew....
Those Olympic winners of ours mumbled when they were expected to sing)
Another national anthem? Have a national poll on a new one?

A Republic without the Queen? But many still adore her...politicians who favour a R. are unhappy.

Why did I come here from another land?  
It's fate--I am a fatalist all through.

Somehow, Down Under has its charms..its quirky features apart.
Made many good friends.

I live the day--I write in HP....I live a very simple life in the eastern suburbs, keep a rose-garden...no rearing of pigs, chooks...
Quarrel with my long-suffering wife about once a week.. it has become a habit but we forget in 5 minutes!

I have little to complain about life in Down Under

11 am, Melb time, 27th Nov

So that was what all the mystery was about! and the reason why we were kept in the dark, Task Force Antler was set up to test Atomic weapons!
I don't think Gordon and me had missed anything exciting, the early days of the task force were just a matter of preparation for the real events that were to come later. The tests were scheduled to take place in October and November, It was rumoured that we would be home for Christmas!
I was impatient to get back home, I worried about my dad's poor health.
I was beginning to put a bit of weight on now, after the spell in hospital,
The food was excellent. There were some Aussies stationed on the camp perimiter, they lived in air conditioned  aluminium units,
we of course,(being British,) roasted and froze on a daily basis, and thought little about it! The days passed quite slowly at first, until we were ready to carry out the first test, It was on a site forty five miles away. We were all assembled on the day of the test. We all wore our sunglasses, and were assembled for the countdown, If memory serves me right it was supposed to be a seventy two hour countdown, but I think the catering staff may have been excused some of it. We all needed to eat, after all!  The first test was like a damp squib, we hardly noticed it. It consisted of a little thunder and a cloud of black smoke. Rumour had it that the touch-paper was damp!
After a week or two the second test loomed. This was much bigger but less than we had expected, both  of the atomic devices had been mounted on towers, the next and final test was to be the biggest.
They asked for volunteers to observe the test from a roadside position some six miles from ground zero, forty five men out of six hundred plus volunteered, I was one of them! Maybe you can work out the percentage ratio, idiots to normal cautious men, It might prove useful to the military. On the day of the test, we were transported up to the roadside position where we began the countdown linked by radio to the headquarters. Half an hour before ground zero, several wagons  full of troops left the forward area. The corporal in charge radioed headquarters, "Has the test been cancelled?"  "No hold your ground, the test is imminent, you know the drill- we are commencing the final countdown."
It was rumoured that there were a number of soldiers in the forward area, in slit trenches, An officer told me later that Dr. William Penney, the chief scientist in charge of the whole test, did a quick calculation on the back of his *** packet, and said "This may be bigger than we expect!
Better bring those troops out of the trenches." It was certainly a wise decision,(probably the only one,ha ha.) We were now the nearest to the bomb! The bomb- or device, was suspended in plain sight, hanging under three barage balloons, (I kid you not),  which were tethered about one hundred and fifty feet above the  desert. The count down continued, Ten, Nine, eight,!!!!

Why don't more Aussies go and give blood
It's all very easy there's never a flood
Of life giving fluid always it's short
And as all will know life can't be bought

In other parts of the world to-day
There are some folk who bleed for their pay
It's got to be much better our way
So let's keep it free forever to stay

A pint's all you give for some poor ill soul
The feeling you get is like kicking a goal
They'll test you too for all manner of sin
And that too is free each way it's a win

When all is done you'll lie around for a while
With biscuits and tea fruit juice and a smile
A stick you'll get to whack on your car
A white bandage too to show what you are

A donor of blood it's said you are special
To give of yourself and not take a shekel
Pleased be with yourself and all will admire
The giver of blood let no life expire

I hate life insurance commercials
They drive me up the wall
I know they focus families
Helping each other
But you have to pay a heap
You see this lady with her poxley old smile
I know it shows the happiness she feels using life insurance
But she looks so ****** poxley
I am getting sick of those commercials because the world
Won't improve if we got it
In fact the world will be losing more money time after time
They just try and rip your money from you and plan to never give it back to you
Even if they say they will, they won't because the life insurance people are big rich ****** who don't give a hoot about us
I wish they would get rid of life insurance adds cause they can drive a good man nuts
When they ring you they try and keep you talking on the phone until they sign you up
It drives you nuts and there is the fact those conversations never happen unless you think you are going to die
No, any insurance is a scam
To get ordinary Aussies to spend all the cash to suppossingly make their after life better for the people they leave behind WHAT A LOAD OF CRAP there is a chance that something will go wrong
You see your family might be put in debt waiting for the money no,
Life insurance is a total scam
Please dudes, don't get ****** in

What do Australians do well?
At the football we really yell,
All sports have cast their spell,
We are all quite laconic,
With work, it's really platonic,
We love a long weekend,
We wish holidays never end,
We even have a public holiday,
For our horse racing day,
Yes, that's Melbourne Cup Day.
What do Australians do well?
Well, we welcome all, do tell,
One multicultural southern land,
Progress changed us to helping hands,
We can work hard, and play hard,
Looking for weekends too far,
We Aussies do lots of stuff real well,
Yes, Australia has cast its spell.

I move in ... " The Dark " ...
Like ... Deep Sea Sharks ...
Therefore ... " My Bite's " ...
Worse Than ... " My Bark " ... !!!
  
Why HATE ... because ... ?
My ... skin tone's ... DARK ... ?!?
  
Racists ... NEED ... !!!
A change of heart ... !!!!!
  
"Some Aussies" ... seem to ... ?
Think they're .... SMART .... !!! ....
  
Well ...
It's ... NOT WISE ...
to make me ... START ... !!!!!
  
"Sydney" ... NEEDS ...
..... My Poetry ..... !!!!!
  
What makes them think ... ???
it's ... " Their Country " ... !?!
  
"Rednecks" ... NEED TO ... !!!
" Leave " .... The Beach ....
and check back through ....
  
.... " Their History " .... !!!!!!
  
I'm DARK ... like ...
.... " Aborigines " .... !!!
  
"Who" ....
Just like ... ME ...
will ... NEVER SEE ... !!!
  
A time where ... we ...
are ... FREE ... to live ...
and ... NOT ... Witness ...
  
HATRED .... from ....
" Redneck " ... RACISTS ...
  
Trust in this ... !!!
My Darkness ... HITS ...
A ...  Rednecks' Lips ...
with ... POTENT ... scripts
that would .... " Befit " ....
  
A day where sunlight
is ... " ECLIPSED " ... !!!!!
  
Why are ... So Many ... ?
AFRAID of ... " The Dark " ...
  
Yet seem ... Afraid ...
of ... "Truth Filled" ... light ... ?!!!?
  
" Party Times " ...
are .... YES .....
  
.... At Night ....
  
and ... ****** Highs ...
Usually ... take flight ...
Long After ... YES ...
Sunlight Shines ... BRIGHT ... !!!!!
  
Darkness ... Rules ...
My ... " Inner Mind " ...
and helps ... Design ...
  
..... " Poetic lines " .....
  
My use of ... rhyme ...
is ... " WELL REFINED " ...
  
to speak on ... " Darkness " ...
WITHOUT ... Harshness ... !!!!!!!
  
Reality's ... BITE ...
is ... STARK and
.... HEARTLESS .... !!!
  
Racism ...
I DO NOT ... " Harness " ... !!!!!
  
But ....
Darkness ... now ...
is how ... things are ... !!!
  
that may seem ... Harsh
but is ....... " THE TRUTH " ..... !!!
  
So ......
Don't you ... start ...
to say ... My Mind ...
is ... Primed to write ...
Rhymes that send out
  
" NEGATIVE " ... vibes ...
  
I'm shedding ... LIGHT ...
On ... " Racist Fights " ... !!!!!
and ... Other Things ...
Within ... My Sight ...
  
while ...
" Most " ... Ignore ...
Until ... They Fall ...
down to where the ...
  
" Dark Ones " .... CALL ....
  
" DARK " .....
Black Holes ...
to ... BUY ...
  
" Your Soul " ...
  
Don't get ... "Caught" ... !!!
you may get ... " Bought " ...
and find that life ... is just ...
  
..... TOO SHORT .....
  
to ... Reject Light ...
  
OPEN ... Your Eyes ... !!!!!
  
and ... REALISE ...
Walking ... "blind" ...
Won't Help ... " Mankind " ... !!!
  
Darkness reigns ...
in skies ... these days ... !!!
Especially when ... Oil Depots ...
  
.......... BLAZE .......... !!!!!!
  
BIG ... " Dark Clouds " ...
across ... Our Towns ... !!!!
  
Things like ... this ...
are causing ... FROWNS ... !!!!!
  
"Darkened" ... MOODS ...
as fuel .... " POLLUTES " .... !!!
Our ... Atmosphere ...
and Peoples' ... food ... !!!!! ...
  
Oil is ... CRUDE ...
and in ... " The News " ...
  
I'm Saying ....
Can't ... " These Fools " ...
  
... " COMPUTE " ... ?!?!?
  
or ... " Manage " ... things
that need ... TIGHT SCREWS ... !!!!!
  
Clearly ... NOT ... !!!!!
  
They're ... Needing Clues ...
on how this ... Started ...
in the ... " DARK " ... ?!!!? ...
  
Things are now ...
Falling .... apart .... !!!
  
Like i've ... said ...
Reality's ... STARK ...
  
" REALITY " ....
  
Sheds Light ... for me ...
on things ... " Most Folks " ...
DON'T WANT ... "to see" ...
  
..... " Poverty " .....
Breeding ... More Thieves ... !!!
.... " Violence on "
Our ... Darkened Streets ... !!!!!!!!
  
Cash Scandals ...
from ... Companies ...
who have ... "Close Links" ...
with our ... " MP's " ...
  
Armies ... who ...
now ... DESTROY ... Peace ... !!!
and leave more ... " Broken Families " ... !!!!!
  
These are ...
  
" DARK TIMES " ... !!!
  
I think you'll find ... ?
  
Unless you ... " Choose " ...
to be .... inclined ....
to ..... look away ......
and turn ... " blind eyes " ...
  
You may find ... that ...
You'll be ... surprised ... !!!
because ... " Such Actions " ...
are ...... " UNWISE " ...... !!!!!
  
Walk in ... " The Light " ...
NOT in ... " The Dark " ...
before ... Your Life ...
Gets Ripped ... APART ... !!!!!
  
Don't play ... " Smart " ...
cos' ... Nature Now ...
is ... Hitting ... HARD ... !!!!!
and .... NOBODY ....
Can Pull ... " It's Card " ... !!!!!!
  
" Big City " ... Lights ...
are ... NOT SO ... bright ...
  
Just like ... " Class "
Life's Now  ... A Farce ... !?!
  
Do what's ... NEEDED ... !!!
Show Some ... HEART ... !!!
  
It's NOT ...
That Hard ... !!!
  
Before our hopes
and dreams ... and world
  
become a place ...
  
That's COLD ...
........ and .......
  
..... " Dark " .....

old poem from the 90s


Sitting patiently atop his tree camouflaged
against the enemy, the ****** waits.
For three days and three nights he has waited
to do his duty for Imperial Japan.
Along the trail walks the enemy. Alert and ready
but not looking up, for this is where the ****** is,
waiting, watching, ready right now.
Levelling his gun, he takes careful aim.
The Aussies swim into focus in his x10 telescopic sights.
Soon it is over as two fall dead, their comrades fleeing
as the Nippon terror strikes,
for he is the ******, amongst Japan’s best,
taking his war to the enemy.

i can see it, a small town on the west coast, not a far drive out of perth, and a tiny little house that’s plenty enough room for the two of us . a wide open verandah and the big windows always open , the salt smell of the ocean drifting on the breeze and all the floral scents of the garden - which is messy but well loved; tall sunflowers ***** between patches of strawberries, endless carrot stalks, iceberg lettuce in the winter, little bushes of tommy toe tomatoes and thyme all year round, an accidental pumpkin patch thriving from a few random seeds left in the compost. a bed like the one we first made love in, memories of that pretty white queen mattress, but it didn’t stay stainless for long -  modest jobs for the both of us, i’d happily spend my days waiting tables by the beach and making coffee for the locals , eclectic and friendly aussies - that spirit can’t be found overseas, that accent will always sound like home - and then to come home to that cosy little bungalow by the beach and cook new foods every night, mostly a disaster but always fun, a mix of all the vegetables from the garden , whatever is in season and we can eat it outside while the sun sets on the day and you compare my eyes to the water of the coast while yours are more like the sky on a cloudy day and i remember how you always said our kids would have ‘the ocean in their eyes’  and  our hunger left unfulfilled after dinner we’ll make a meal out of each other  let’s make love all night  every night  until one day nine months later we may find ourselves blessed with a third pair of eyes to observe the blissful life we’ve created for ourselves in this town  far away from everything we’ve known just comfortable and safe and happy with something physical now to hold us together for a year and 18 more and the rest of forever

~for betterdays, and all Aussies~


the fires massifs all around, the smokes surrounds,
the house invaded with closed-out-of-college students,
mother and father who are similarly workless, a fire bounty,
all this a treat to an nine year old (no school) boy and his dog

newly self-appointed ringleader, the little boy,
in his fire heaven, with a gang to command, to entertain,
some adults, silly college students, who don’t know “no,”
when he says this is the game we are playing next

this vignette, is not a Manhattan variety^
but an insight story heard, unwitnessed, but of
those who tell the tale, unwittingly, of finding small joys
amidst sky-full clouds, all grayed bunting of burning stink

few wiser than my old, tired and smokey clouded eyes,
though, one yet detects those who are truly not lost,
those who are found, and those who will find them all,
and lead them to the safest places inside themselves

and my heart and brain, at last in unison,
forgives the restless adults who with grownup worries,
yet can! just barely detect those mini joy-rivulets among the whiffs
of destruction and bravery, losses and new hands extended

So I ask, Mum, what game shall we play next?

Perhaps, Noah’s Ark?

Yo, Earth, this is Australia calling,
Oz has decided to stop stalling,
We have finally sent you our bless,
We've agreed to share our feral pets,
Yes, it's time at last Oz did its share,
Feral gift pet sets from Australia fair,
First, to enable total world peace,
We're mailing crocodiles to the Middle East,
You know, "Never smile at a crocodile,"
They'll eat your ISIS guns with a toothy smile,
Next, we'll donate Red Back spiders,
Look out militants, they'll sit down  beside yer!
Our third gift is some great white sharks,
All programmed for Peace in their hearts,
Finally, funnel web spiders and Taipans,
We're sharing our pets with hostile lands,
All your wars shall be a failure,
Peace on Earth, from Aussies in Australia!

These Days I'm AMAZED ... !!!
In .... " SO MANY WAYS " ... !!!

People Seem To Think ...
That Things Are OKAY ... ?!?

A Law Passed Today ...
Has Left Me ... AMAZED ... !!!

The Government Say Adoption's Okay ...
For People NOT Married And Those Who Are Gay ...

Now Let's Look At THAT ...

If You're A Man Who Likes To *** MAN ...
Where Does A Kid Fit INTO Your Stance ... ?!?

Unless Things Have CHANGED ...
In How Kids Are ... " Made " ... !?!

It Must Be ME ... !!!

But Now It Would Seem ...
Some Women Have A DIFFERENT ... " Dream " ...
of Having A Child ............. WITHOUT A Man ... ?!?

OFF To The ***** Bank To FILL UP Their Tank ...

Women Like THESE Now AMAZE Me ... !!!

They Say There's NO MEN So Become Lesbians ... ?!?

So Where's The Logic Behind Their Actions ...

But CLEARLY Some Men Have ... "little sense" ... ?!?
Here's A Story About ... One of Them ...

A Guy I Once Knew Will Give You Some Proof ...
So Check Out This Story Cos' This One Is TRUE ... !!!

We're Drinking One Night And Jokes Are In Flight ...

He Tells Us About A Night On The Town ...
He's Out In A Bar And Having A Laugh ...
But Felt Down Below Was Ready To BLOW ... !!!
He Looked For The Toilet So That He Could Go ...

He Then Saw A Sign So Moved DOUBLE TIME ... !!!!!

As He Got Close A Man Then Approached ...
The Closer He Got The Man Tried To BLOCK ... ?!?

My Mate Stepped .... ASIDE ....
When He Thought They'd COLLIDE ... !!!

Then The Door OPENED It Was Made of ... GLASS ... !!!
It Was His REFLECTION He Tried To Let ... Pass ... !?!?!?!?!

It's NOT That He Did It ...
That Made My Sides ... S P L I T ... !!!!!
  
But That He Had ... " Let " ...
These Words Pass Through His Lips ... !!!!!!
My Mates And I Sat There And Burst Into ... " FITS " ... !!!!!!!

See ... Some DO AMAZE With Things That They Say ... !!!!

It's Clear That Some Drugs Are Worse Than ******* ...
And CLEARLY Make Some People Act Quite INSANE ... !!!!!

Now Check Out This Script For More Proof of This ... !!!

My Friend's In A World With A ... " Coc'd Up Girl " ... !!!
She's Now Had His Child But Lives Pretty WILD ... !!!

She Used To LAP DANCE ... You Get The Profile ... !!!

One Night She Decides To ...
Jump In The Car But DOESN'T Go Far ... !!!

The Top of The Road To Pick Up A Curry ...
But When She Gets Home She's Clearly Quite WORRIED ... !?!

She Says To My Friend ...

"I went in the car, but when I came out, forgot where I parked !"

My Friend Said To Her ... "You're having a laugh !"

They Walked Up The Road And What Do You Know ...
The Car Was There SNIFFING A FAT LINE of Coc' ... !!!!!

Of Course That's A JOKE But Think of It Folks ...
SHE'S Raising A Kid AMAZING But ... SICK ... !!!
That's Child Gonna See Some ... AMAZING Things ... !!!

I'm Now Quite Amazed By TV Today ... !!!
And By Modern Music That FILLS Our Airwaves ... ?!?

Violence And *** Are Now The NEW FLEX ... !!!
From TV To BIG SCREEN ... To CD's With Decks ...
I'm Wondering Now What's Coming ... Next ... ?!?!?

Alcohol Now Is Fed Til' Some ... "DROWN" ... !!!
While Governments FROWN On Drunken Louts ... !!!

What Is THAT About ... !?!
Whom EXACTLY Are They Trying To Kid ... ?!?
That Laws Like THIS Will Make Young Drunks ...
Wisely RESTRAIN From Drinking Til' They Drown Their Brain ...

Things Like THIS Truly Amaze ... !!!
Cash Is CLEARLY Such Laws AIM ... !!!

Here's One More Story About A Nightclub ...
South Africans ... Aussies And Kiwis ENTER ...

An Englishman Told Me He Was Quite AMAZED ... !!!
By Things That He SAW INSIDE This Place ...

He Told Me Straight He Felt So ASHAMED ... !!!!!

He Liked A Good Drink ...
But What He SAW Made Him FEEL SICK ... !!!!!

He Witnessed Some Things He Could NOT BELIEVE ... !!!

Last Orders Had Gone But Some Wanted MORE ... !!!!!
Believe It or NOT He Said He Was SHOCKED ...
With What He THEN Saw ... !!!!!
Some People Resorted To LICKING THE FLOOR ... !!!!!!!!!!!

AMAZING ... INDEED ...
A ... DISGUSTING BREED ... !!!!!

What Kind of Germs LIVE In ... " THEIR JAWS " ... !?!?!
Be CAREFUL BEFORE ... You KISS Them Fa' SURE ... !!!
You May Get MUCH WORSE Than The  Odd COLD SORE ... !!!

See ... That's What I Mean ...
Some People Do Things That Are BEYOND Belief ... !?!

AMAZING Indeed Like ... SLAVERY ... !!!
Or LUSTING For GREED When Most Are In NEED ...
of Finding A Way To AVOID ....... Poverty ... !!!

I Guess It's Just ME Who Chooses To SEE ...
Things Such As These In How People Be ...

And INCLUDES Them IN ... " My Poetry " ......

Well I'm One of A Few Who's Quick To USE ...
AMAZING Things That People DO ... !!!

They May Seem FUNNY In DIFFERENT Ways ...
But STUNTS Like THESE Are .... REALITY .... !!!!!

Government Ways And FOOLISH DISPLAYS ...
And NOW Who Will Raise Our Children These Days ... ?!?

Sometimes Leave Me Feeling Bemused And ........

............................. " Amazed " ............................. !?!

we i was young
and perpetually broke

and equally bored
there was a place
i would go...

with towel in hand
and a bottle of red cordial,
a book to read
and reef brand coconut oil,
in a cotton shoulder bag.

i would set off down
to the beach,
a mile or so away.
filching, apples and milk
money, along the way.

once there, would find
a spot up near the dunes
and stay and read and broil
away.

breaking my sunbaking
only to go buy
"three dollars of chips
and a chiko roll"
with money purlioned
and a guilty grin...

ocassionally i would fall
asleep and wake up
lobster red....and suffer
the burn for days..
but the more you suffered
the deeper the tan..
nut brown was the desired look.. or in these days
parlance cafe au lait....

now i pay for that innocent
delight...
with checks,three monthly
on sunspots and the lurking
fear of melaloma always near ...

i am not the only one,
there is a generation,
of sun bronzed aussies.
who now pay dear,
for those earlier
ignorant years.

GABBY Waller lives around the corner from Owen Wilson, down the road from Julia Roberts, walked past Seth Rogan at the grocery store last week and sat opposite Liam Hemsworth and Miley Cyrus at dinner the other night.

The LA lifestyle is a big change for the former Rockhampton girl who currently calls California home after leaving life in Australia to get her foot in the fashion industry door in one of the world's fashion capitals.

The 22-year-old packed up her life two months ago, sold her Australian clothing label and followed the gut instinct she said she always had to move to Los Angeles.

"I've always been drawn to America, I've always felt this pull towards it, LA in particular which is why I visited LA last year to hold an event here for my business at the time," she said.

Gabby In fashion week in Sydney in 2014.

"The event was a huge success and I got hooked on the creativity that screams from this city. I suppose I got a taste for the fashion scene here and decided to make the move here in May. I sold the business in January as I felt I got STR8 UP to exactly where it needed to be and it was time for me personally to move on to my next venture.

"I'm working as a designer's assistant with a brand based in Downtown LA called BILLY, a brand Justin Bieber regularly wears, and work closely with the designer who reminds me exactly why I do what I do and love this industry. I also do fashion styling on the side and am putting together my own photoshoot for the Australian label Isabelle Quinn. This is my year to really push my knowledge and get involved in as much as I can, LA makes you so hungry to work and I've never been more motivated to dig my claws in."

Although the former Cathedral College student thrives off the hustle and bustle of catching that big city break, Gabby admits to missing the small town 'hey mate' attitudes she grew up knowing and said she doesn't think she'll ever get used to seeing celebrities in their jeans buying milk and bread.

"I feel LA has a huge 'I don't care about you, I just want to know what you can do for me' kind of attitude and you'll very regularly get asked what you do before being asked your name," she said.

"I miss that small town community hub that Rocky has and I really miss how friendly us Aussies are but for now this is home for the next 12 months and I'm loving every minute of it.

"It was a scary leap to take moving here but I really do believe anything is possible if you put your mind to it.

"The absolute dream would be to work in the fashion houses in the design department of the big designer brands that you see on the runway.

"But I've still got a lot of learning to do.

"It's exciting to see what the future holds."Read more at:http://www.marieaustralia.com/formal-dresses-2016 | www.marieaustralia.com/formal-dresses-sydney

AUSTRALIANS ALL LET US REJOICE

AS WE DRINK A BEER, AND HAVA BBQ WITH MATES

SURE WILL, BE MIGHTY FINE

ACROSS THE CENTRE, OVER AYERS ROCK

AND OVER SYDNEY OPERA HOUSE YEAH

AND DON’T FORGET TO LEAVE A MESSAGE FOR ABBOTT

AND PARLIAMENT HOUSE OH YEAH

I JOYOUS STAINS ON MY CARPET YEAH, WE’LL HAVE TO CLEAR IT UP

AND MAKE YOUR WIFE ENJOY THE ENGLISH WAY, BEER FROM A PARTY CUP

PLEASE YOBBOS, PLEASE REFRAIN, FROM BASHING PEOPLE UP AGAIN

AUSTRALIAN’S ALL LET US SPEW AFTER WE HAVE OUR BEER

OUR MIGHTY PART OF BUDDHAS REIGN, IS SHOWING US HOW TO PARTY

JEEZ, OH GOD OR BUDDHA PLEASE, GET ME A CAN OF BEER

AND BOINCE IT AROUND ON MY BELLY LIKE A FULL BOWL OF JELLY

DADDY IS COMING TO PROTECT ME, IN THE FORM OF AN AUSTRALIAN GIRL

SIX WHITE BOOMERS, SNOW WHITE BOOMERS, RACING BRIAN ALLAN THROUGH THE AUSSIE SUN

TO GET OVER TO THE LAKE FOR THE FIREWORKS, BABY

AND PARTY, ON INTO THE DAY

IN SOUTH AUSTRALIA I WAS BORN YEAH THE WAY, HE HE THE WAY

IN SOUTH AUSTRALIA, PARTY YEAH FOR AUSTRALIA DAY

WE’RE ON THE TRACK WINDING BACK TO THE OLD FASHIONED SHACK

ON THE ROAD TO BEETALOO, WHERE THE KFC IS THERE FOR FINGER LICKING TASTY CHICKEN

BENEATH OUR SUNNY SKY, MY DADDY IS DEAD, BUT STILL MY MUM, STILL LIVES DOWN MY WAY

NO MORE CAN I ROAM, CAUSE I AM HEADING STRAIGHT FOR HOME

ON THE ROAD TO BEETALOO

SINGING, HEY BABY HEY BABY HEY, BOYS SAY, GIRLS SAY

HEY BABY HEY BABY HEY, BOYS HIT THE GIRLS IN THE BACK, WHATS YA GOING TO SAY ABOUT THAT

WHEN I WAS YOUNG LAD I SIT ON THE COUCH

AND WATCH THE AUSSIE DAY FIREWORKS ON THE TELE

YA SEE, ALL THE GREAT AUSSIES WAVING THEIR FLAGS

AND MY BEER GAVE ME A FAT BELLY

THEN AT QUARTER TO 5, THE COUNTRY SAID SON

NO TIME FOR BLUDGING, THERE IS WORK TO BE DONE

COME ON MATE, CLEAN THE BBQ FOR US

SO WE CAN HAVE AN AUSTRALIA DAY CELEBRATION WITH FAMILY

I AM A ROAST POTATO ROAST POTATO YEAH MATE YEAH

I WRITE THESE STORIES DRINKING MY COKE

YA SEE, THE SUGAR IS COMING THROUGH MY BRAIN

AND DRIVING THE WORLD COMPLETELY INSANE

HOT TOMATO HOT TOMATO, PARTY AT THE MALL

PARTY AT THE SITE OF THE OLD SWING HALL

WHERE I LIVE NOW

I AM MENTAL, I AM CRAZY

I DON’T DO NORMAL, I AM REFORMED FROM MY EVIL

BUT DUDES, I DON’T DO BEHAVING EITHER

THOSE MEN IN CANBERRA WHO TOLD ME TO BEHAVE, CAN GET A LIFE

I HAVE TO BE CAREFUL, ABOUT SAYING THEIR JEALOUS, BECAUSE OF WHAT HAPPENED TO ALLANBY

BUT I AM POOR, I DESERVE THE RIGHT TO BE COOL

IF YOU RICH ****** CAN’T HANDLE IT, WOLLOPOLOO

IT’S NOT A WORD BUT IT’S A COOL THING TO SAY

PARTY PARTY PARTY, TILL THE END OF THE DAY

.                             mono     automaton
                          q  u  a  s  i  o  m  n  i;
in­to root of the crux
                                                i will
                       invoke,
a black cardinal,
  that challenges
  all self-righteous popes,
and all self-imposing
popes;
   are my words not bread?
are my words not wine?
then who claims authority
over the justification
   of the authenticity of
            recruiting people
toward the position of "power"?
   who's if not the dead borthers
feed your near cannibalistic mouths?
        who feeds the living,
when who feeds the living,
are dead?!
          necrophilia; rampant!!!
cry...                 asylum! asylum!
who's over-reacting?
   some irish will tell ye'...
    i hate the irish...
   i have a fetish for hating them;
esp. those
settled in england;
  those ******* i hate the most;
why?
    i was wearing a german army
shirt in an irish pub, and
what did the bartender say?
i can't serve you.
   you engaged in the second
world war, paddy?!
******* potato harvester
     ginger-dangle-bell of
a hope... that never comes...
just the drowning ginger ***
who's abode was and will
           be the belfast dim-wit
known as
                              the titanic;
**** me, i'm not even born &
bred english and i already find
the irish worthy of considering
genocidal tendencies...
scots? **** me, shoot me
to a pub for a whisk,
and some 'aggis neeps 'n' tatties...
the welsh?
      what, the ultra-german spelling
machine that's not even
comparable to germans?
   i'll just talk to charlie prince, y'all...
rrrr... (i just had to make it obvious)...
the ear-ish?
       i ******* hate the *****...
and i'm not even english to begin with...
some people you immediately get
to love...
   aussies, the finns...
                 and some people you
immediately get to hate...
                       the irish, the germans;
it's a shame though,
   i learned this pathos
   from acquiring the english language...
i.e. "assimilating" into
  the culture, p.s. the i.r.a. attacks,
so yeah, peedee pi dee p'oh,
   and a paedo to ring
             the bell for friday's mass...
   f
                            uck
             me,
            coming off the rocking chair,
next you'll find me so much so
assimilated that i'll be calling
it the irish and the northern monkeys...
vs. the loondish
               and the southern fairies /
                                                   pansies;
i suppose if you're ever
going to assimilate, hold to the local
customs (when in rome,
         do as the romans do),
**** me, it's great,
at least i can finally realise that
   there's no greater "racism" than in
the intra- realm, as oppossed to
the inter- realm...
    once again... it's not racism,
   it's "racism"... or a way to get along;
s.j.w.b.g.l.t.q.t.+ sycophant?
    drunk like a skunk... you walked
into my bedroom, you'd get an aura
of a brewery...
                  i can't believe i had
to learn english, and have to succumb
to outer-london prooper english
stereotypes, that i was trying to avoid;
but at least the irish made it plainly
obvious for me to establish,
   giving my transcendental approach
to diacritical marks, which made me sound
posh english, and them,
  my synthetically inherited enemy;
which is nice, breaking away from
hating the russians and the germans;
if i go to a pub?
   i only drink guinness...
  why? it doesn't taste the same in a can
or in an export bottle...
    you need to drink guinness in a pint glass.