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Jan 4 · 145
Eternally Yours
Christina S Jan 4
I was lying in the fetal,
begging to be a memory-
But you saw worth
You saw potential in me

Thank you for being part
of my life, my story
You gave me hope in a void
In my darkest hour you were there for me

I remember a time when
life had no color scheme.
Drained from all it's worth,
It was becoming a regular theme

Now I see brightly lit skies!
My senses are tickled and more
You've rescued me from the abyss
And I will be thankful evermore!
Dec 2020 · 123
Christina S Dec 2020
Hope perches on a branch in my heart

waiting patiently for spring to come;

She looks out of her broken window

wondering where the cold comes from.

Love is a tired old woman in the

depths of my soul, fatigued and dismayed;

Not knowing what should come naturally,

she sits in the dark afraid.

There outside an empty corpse

love tries to breathe life into me

Almost unwillingly, hope accepts just

enough love to survive, just barely

Because all that is within her

knows that love ends with pain.

the voice inside reminds her that no one

can ever take away her stain.
This was a long time ago.....
Dec 2020 · 125
Wrapped Up In Christmas
Christina S Dec 2020
I'm all wrapped up in Christmas
but I'm not wrapped up in me
I like to help other people
and delight in my family

I'm all wrapped up in Christmas
Every Christmas activity you can foresee
If I had my druthers, I'd help all
my friends put up their Christmas trees

I'm all wrapped up in Christmas
Armed with wrapping paper, boxes and bows
Although the gifts don't make the holiday
It is fun to watch the kids open toys and clothes

Yes, I'm all wrapped up in Christmas
The Spirit has a strong grasp on me
And as I sit by the glow of the fire, I
remember my fondest Christmas memories
Nov 2020 · 236
My Joy
Christina S Nov 2020
Leaves drained of their vibrant green
Snow gently falling on the ground,
Deer sneaking around in the meadow
All without making a sound.

Winter is here with slick icy roads
With COVID and others to boot
Thanksgiving is around the corner
And then we get our Christmas loot

Family is the name of the game
Friends are welcome too
Friends are family we pick
Bonds stuck together like glue

Joy beams from my heart
I love this time of year!!
For the birth of our Savior
My family, my friends and my dear
Just some thoughts about the season......
Mar 2020 · 120
Christina S Mar 2020
There's an unseen invader
waiting to make me sick,
Lurking around the house
time goes by-tick-tock-tick

Scared of the unknown
Not much left to do
If it's as bad as they say
I haven't got a clue

I'm doing all I can
against the unseen enemy
I dream of the day when
once again I can roam free
The virus has us all on edge....
Dec 2019 · 176
A Christmas Poem
Christina S Dec 2019
That special season is here
With Christmas love and cheer
And the children are full of laughter;
they help decorate the tree
as they're filled with glee
It's the spirit of giving I'm after!
There's lists of things to do
And shopping lists, that's true!
All for the magical month of December;
And for the good girls and boys
we'll buy them clothes and toys
And donate to those in need--we'll remember!
When Christmas finally is here
And our loved ones are near
We'll open our gifts and thank the "One";
Without Christ there would be no special day
So we honor Him in our traditional way
We gather 'round the tree and have so much fun.
Each Christmas is special for old and the young
If family or friends we're among
Then we're truly blessed this joyous day!
My favorite time of year
Oct 2019 · 681
Beauty Surrounds
Christina S Oct 2019
As the autumn leaves whirl around
I sit quietly listening to the sound
And look outside, struck by what I've found
The beauty that surrounds

Now fall is not my favorite time of year
Christmas is, and for good cheer
I get to spoil my kids, and my dear
And love abounds

I love my husband and he loves me
There's no arguing, we live happily
I'm awestruck everyday by what I feel and see
Like his queen, I was crowned

So as I'm faced with autumn, and the cold
I'll surround myself with love and beauty untold
I have my love and he has me to hold
As the leaves fall all around
For my love
Oct 2019 · 696
Crying Earth
Christina S Oct 2019
Rainy days, they are the worst
Gloomy skies, disheartened sighs
I know the trees, they have a thirst
And to summers end we'll say goodbye

Thunder in a lightning storm
There are no birds melodies today
Outside it is too **** warm
A sign of our societies decay
Sep 2019 · 289
Finding Moments
Christina S Sep 2019
I savor our moments
And long for your touch
It's me you enrapture
I need you so much!

Can't tell you just how
I quiver when you're near
Just need to hold you
And have you with me here

I know I'm missing a
descriptive metaphor or noun
But you just read the words of
this poem where my love can be found.
Sep 2019 · 546
Thank You
Christina S Sep 2019
Thank you for reminding me of my beauty
Thank you for doing what you do to me
Thank you for being there at just the right time
Thank you for setting my soul free!

I wanted to write this poem
Not that it had to be done
But rather that I appreciate you
And to let you know that I have fun
Sep 2019 · 516
Christina S Sep 2019
The autumn winds roar like
my inner goddess does for you.
Although the leaves change, love,
I promise that I never do!

Sep 2019 · 294
The One
Christina S Sep 2019
A smile that matches my own
The look in my loves eyes
it is enchanting to say the least
this comes as no surprise

A heart unbridled with passion
The knowing that we belong
Being held in his arms
Listening to our song

A gentle touch between lovers
that brings his dimples out, you know
the beautiful smile that touches my soul
The one that brings me up when I feel low

A hand to hold when times are hard
Someone to listen and wipe away my tears
The person that lights my fire
The one that takes away all my fears
Sep 2019 · 403
Christina S Sep 2019
like the oceans tide
vast cerulean blue
my love goes on forever

Aug 2019 · 374
Seasons Change
Christina S Aug 2019
Cool autumn breezes blow
Soon cascades of colors will be upon us
Once blooming fields are now faded
Winters kiss we'll soon know
It's that time of year again, leaves are just starting to turn
Aug 2019 · 264
Christina S Aug 2019
Twins lost several years ago
still on my mind
my nightmares remind me
there's no solace to find

To never hear those giggles
To never hear one cry
I must've asked a thousand times
"God, why'd you take them, why?"

They were only in my womb a while
But I think about them still
I have to believe there's an afterlife
Because I will hold them. I will!

Some people say "It was for the best!"
I would like to know how they know
because to me that comment
hits lower than the low

I know my angel babies
have wiped the tears where I lay
And they are playing with the Almighty
In the Awesome Kingdom where they stay
Lost twins in utero several years ago but never forget
Aug 2019 · 194
Christina S Aug 2019
Though my path is not always clear
sometimes it takes a hard look in the mirror
I need to know where I've been
to know where I'm going and then
It's up to me to overcome all the strife
That I've been through in my life
and never lose sight of my dreams
For my kids and my family--we're a team
I grew up without hope and so much more
I'm glad my kids can be happy. They are adored!
For them to grow up free of fear
Is something I hold especially dear
I wonder how I avoided the pitfalls of this earth
But as I grew older, people saw me and found worth
Now I am free to live and love as I please
The times of enduring and persisting have ceased
Had a rough start to life..
Aug 2019 · 924
Christina S Aug 2019
I love you and unlike Shakespeare
I cannot count the ways....
Being in your arms, it's like heaven
with the passing of the days

Cherished are these moments
spent lying next to you
Without you by my side
I don't know what I'd do

Because no one can compare
to the sweetness of your soul
And no one could ever fill
that void and make me whole
Lets just hope we have many years together :)
Aug 2019 · 242
You Saw Me
Christina S Aug 2019
You looked in my soul and saw
who I really was and could be,
So much potential and love to give
You were the one with eyes to see

-that there was strength in my soul
you took what was broken and made it whole
my love amplifies because of you everyday
the beginning of my life didn't take it's toll

-that there was pain in my soul
and you carefully mended and cared
it's been so long since I've been hurt
it's because of you that I've been spared

God sent me an Angel and it is you
After all these years you still hypnotize
I'm so happy to wake up next to you each morn'
And you still look at me with love in your eyes
Aug 2019 · 327
When I Think Of You
Christina S Aug 2019
hearts entwined
in passion
and chemistry
the verbs
just on relay
but my heart
skips a beat
every time I
think of you
Aug 2019 · 376
Nocturnal Love
Christina S Aug 2019
Please embrace me tighter
as we kiss madly and deeply
Lets allow the jealous moon to watch
while I give you the best of me

Aug 2019 · 390
Christina S Aug 2019
Today I wear a facade
so you can't see my pain,
you won't know my loneliness
but my tears will still fall like rain

Christina S Aug 2019
There is beauty in everything
your voice,your eyes, your smile
everything else around me adds to the
beauty and makes this life worthwhile
If you are wondering if you are beautiful too
Of course you are, you are one of God's creatures
No need to paint yourself all up because
you already have stunning features

O God's creatures, know time is a teacher
I've been wondering for so long
What's the meaning of beauty
Is it what we see?
Is it that flower you wish to pluck
And save in a glass?
Is it what you are wanting to be?

I answered myself

It's that moon standing still in darkness
Plenty of holes and yet, its so bright

Its that fruiting, shading palm tree
Sitting in empty desert lonely

Its that sound no one heard and its that side
That shallow persons had never seen

I told myself
Beauty is that warm heart residing in your heavenly caring chest
Loving from east to west
Its you being you

I asked myself to define beauty
And I realized it's a divine beauty.
Aug 2019 · 190
I Thought I Knew
Christina S Aug 2019
With careless and wild eyes
you unleashed a big surprise
you didn't love me anymore,
I thought I knew what love was
but surely I didn't 'cause
I wasn't the one that you adored.
My mom cried more than i did
as I was the one that you got rid
leaving permanent emotional burns,
you used me for my looks
grasped in with your hooks
and yet for you I yearned.
You were just a bump in the road
to catch my prince I kissed a toad
I'm so grateful you set me free,
I know you're still alone now
karma works that way somehow
And now I have my own family
A breakup from forever ago. See? Breakups hurt but sometimes they really are for the best!!
Aug 2019 · 273
Bated Breath
Christina S Aug 2019
She melted like a scoop of ice cream
soft in his capable strong arms
thoughts danced in her head like a dream
while he grazed his hand against her *****

Faster and faster went her bated breath
as her heart almost leapt out of her chest
he came and gave her a little death
simply by giving her loves stolen kiss
Aug 2019 · 165
Christina S Aug 2019
Honey, you make me feel alive
like all my dreams came true
as if I'm completely electrified
my body screams for you

When I get to thinking
What we are capable of
I get all hot and sweaty
and search for my love

Honey, now I know I'm alive
I'm aware I rush to satisfy
I would slow down but
dear I think I might die!
I took out a stanza that I thought might be 18+, so I hope the last stanza makes sense. :-)
Aug 2019 · 328
Christina S Aug 2019
Your mocha skin against mine
such a contrast if there ever were
love songs on the radio heats up the
room and passion begins to stir

Visions of time long past, blended
with feelings of loving you more each day
It's a mix of desire I so much enjoy
And far away from everyone, we play

Wrapped up in bed sheets, but not for long
You transport me to a place that's timeless
You know the combination to my body
And I am lost in you, I confess

When the steam dissipates, I see you
with a wild grin upon your face
You know what I'm thinking
That no one could ever take your place
Aug 2019 · 380
Haiku (Broken)
Christina S Aug 2019
promises and hearts
frail and fragile they are just
made to be broken

Aug 2019 · 221
Poetry Is...
Christina S Aug 2019
Poetry is a part of my heart
I dare say a part of my being
Without the release of emotion
there is nothing else so freeing

It's not just words arranged
No, its more than that I say
It's emotion and experience together
In a mesmerizing mental display

I've always written so personally
about my life and details, that's true
but I think that for me, poetry is
a culmination of feelings I can't undo

Words are born on a blank page
and my pen dances to the song of my soul
Unleashed and exposed, each word
forming stanzas until I feel whole
Aug 2019 · 136
Thoughts On Love
Christina S Aug 2019
"It is what it is! " Says Love
"This is insane!" Says Reason
"You'll regret it!" Says Caution
"It'll cause you pain!" Says Fear
"This is ridiculous!" Says Pride
"This could end badly!" Says Experience
"I'll be left in pieces!" Says the heart
"It is what it is!" Says Love
Aug 2019 · 289
A Gift
Christina S Aug 2019
The past is the past
I just want to grow
The present is a gift
I want to take it and know

That I've lived fully and that
I've loved with all my heart
I think in the end that's what matters
Is the love you gave from the start

For years I felt stuck
In my pains and sorrows
I'm not a victim, never was
I look forward to my tomorrows

I've come to terms with some
things that have happened to me
I am a very persistant person, so
I will live happy, unburdened and free!
Never take today for granted
Jul 2019 · 220
Holding My Breath
Christina S Jul 2019
Sometimes I can't find the rhyme
Feels like I'm running out of time
Trying to find the source of my anxiety
Wondering what the hell is wrong with me

Feeling like I'm drowning alone in a lake
No one to help me but me for my sake
I like to write of love and though true
It's hard to do when you're down and blue

I'm scared to death, I don't know why
Just holding my breath, I can't even cry
Scarier than any horror flick you've seen
That is what panic disorder for me has been
Panic Disorder is widely suffered and hardly talked about
Jul 2019 · 262
In Your Arms
Christina S Jul 2019
In your arms I know everything
is as the way it should be
When times are uncertain,
your strength consoles me

In your arms I find love
The kind that doesn't run away
In you I have found faithfulness
What I can count on from day to day

In your arms I find forgiveness
instead of judgement or fear
From you I get what I need
For that I love you so much, dear

In your arms I've found my soulmate
The man I crave night and day
I'll forever be yours 'till the end of time
And when that is, who's to say?
Jul 2019 · 541
Greatest Love
Christina S Jul 2019
My greatest love of all is
right here sitting next to me
I feel like I owe him everything
Without him I don't know where I'd be

My love for him is like trying
to capture the ocean's tide
I feel full to bursting when I think
of him-only in him can I confide

And no matter what I tell him
He won't judge me in any way
True to his loving nature
I can count on him to stay

People said our love wouldn't
ever stand the test of time
Well, it has, and through my struggles,
he still makes my life sublime.
Jul 2019 · 315
Christina S Jul 2019
Need for you is a primal desire
Bodies in the dark finding their way
Mine is so hot in your fire
Until the ******* sun turns to day

Our bodies fit together like lock and key
I wonder who likes it more, you or me?
And you continue this assault on me daily
I love crumbling under the weight of your body
Jul 2019 · 142
Waking Gently
Christina S Jul 2019
The sun rises in the east
with loud colors of orange, yellow and red
waking gently the sleepy birds
that come and peck at my window

Vibrant life begins as nocturnal
animals slink back into their homes
The sun proudly shows off her heat
and beauty as she has been in hiding

Today I will bask in her warmth
and enjoy life's little miracles
As she warms our lakes and rivers
I will swim in the living waters
Last attempt at free verse....i think :-)
Jul 2019 · 103
An Extraordinary Afternoon
Christina S Jul 2019
A gentle sun peeks from the clouds
as we go in the water to wade
We hurry to our favorite spot
before the afternoon begins to fade

No swimming for me today
Not warm enough to take the dive
this place~surrounded by sand
dunes, makes me feel so alive

Minnows flash over my feet,
A dragonfly flies by me,
Natures majesty in full display
An afternoon extraordinary
Had a great day!
Jul 2019 · 375
Christina S Jul 2019
In a field of wildflowers
I feel touched by God
As if heaven descended
upon this forgotten earth

The sky is a perfect blue
Well, you know the kind
This place untarnished
Awarded to no person

Time crawls by here
As I take in the aroma
And the bounty of color
I leave them, wild and free
Trying my hand at writing free style. I think it would have been easier to rhyme....LOL
Jul 2019 · 265
Sweet Rendezvous
Christina S Jul 2019
I recall our sweet rendezvous
When love was so blind
Passions erupted under moonlight
With our bodies entwined

My flesh against yours
Adrenaline pumping like crazy
Your lips foreign but intoxicating
This pleasure was so new to me

Meetings would take place here and there
Mostly in places so exciting and new
Those times I'd wait for you were torture
I'd like to think it was torture for you too
I was trying to write a free verse and yet it rhymes!
Jul 2019 · 502
Broken Heart
Christina S Jul 2019
Didn't mean to break your heart
Didn't mean to make you cry
Wasn't prepared for the look on your face
When you turned to me and asked "why?"

Sometimes things aren't meant to be
And I wasn't trying to be cruel
Seems like we were more friendly
I wasn't taking you for a fool
Sometimes it's just best to be honest even when it hurts. This seems like a lifetime ago.
Jul 2019 · 200
Manic Monday
Christina S Jul 2019
I have to get up very soon
Why am I still writing poetry?
Tonight the thoughts keep flowing
from that creative side of me

I think about life and love
and everything in between
I marvel at all the wonderful
things that I have seen

But deep down I
wonder if I'm manic
And gonna be up all night
"I should sleep" I say and panic

I think of all the things
I could be doing but I need to get to bed
It's crazy how I fight sleep
and how fast ideas go through my head
It's amazing the stigma that is still attached to those that are bipolar, etc.
Jul 2019 · 663
Christina S Jul 2019
How much of you can I forget?
Can I erase you from memory?
The heart isn't as easily tamed
In there you will forever be
Jul 2019 · 226
Calla Lily
Christina S Jul 2019
In my sacred place I spy you
How dare you flaunt like you do?
I watch you grow from seeds I've sown
Your curves superior to my own

Your *** is plain to see
Drawing the humble honeybee
in with your succulence
watching as you dance,

freely with the wind and rain
I stand by like a hideous bane
Jealous of something I'll never be
Fertile, purple, strong and free

Dare I pluck you here and now?
Keep your splendors to me somehow?
Put you in a vase and imprison thee
Flaunt your beauty only to me
I make myself sound quite unappealing but I was trying to capture the beauty of the flower.
Jul 2019 · 95
Among The Stars
Christina S Jul 2019
As your gaze fixes in mine
I can feel the world stand still
For a moment, as you kiss me
my life and heart are fulfilled

You have given me a love
that is both amazing and kind
This is such a blessing 'cause
true love is so hard to find

You are my destiny
and all my heart desires
I spend all day and night
putting out your fires

And when we are no longer,
when we are among the stars,
our love will be a legend
No matter where we are!
Mar 2019 · 190
Daddy's Gone
Christina S Mar 2019
Day in and day out I pretend
that when you left it was the end
of hurt feelings and your lies
Wipe the pain from my eyes

You never were my Daddy
You didn't even try to be
No matter how old I get
Your words and deeds I can't forget

There were always things that were
more important, like drinking, for sure
So I thought the pain of you wouldn't last
When you moved away and became my past

Though my future is full of positivity
I can't help but ask what is wrong with me
Everything that Dad said is so wrong
My love, my life, proves that I am strong.
No one call fill the void a Dad leaves behind
Jan 2019 · 145
A Love So True
Christina S Jan 2019
Once upon a time my heart
was broken and defeated
The pain I endured had
broken me and I retreated

A heart in shambles from
mistreatment and despair
Had left me feeling alone
and with no one to care

But I found a man who I
thought would be like the rest
Alas, he repaired my heart
and filled it with zest

And now and again to this
day when I feel blue
He reminds me how adored I am
and that we share a love so true!
Nov 2018 · 177
Christmas With You
Christina S Nov 2018
Stockings lined up with care
The garland wrapped up the stairs
No place under the tree is bare
Christmas is heaven with you

Cardinals and bulbs climb the tree
Gorgeous heirlooms out for all to see
Watching this together with me
Christmas is heaven with you

Each Christmas is better than the last
Maybe its just appreciation as time passed
I'm just cognizant of how it goes by so fast
Christmas is heaven with you

My Saviors birth marks the day
When people open gifts and kids play
We all remember Jesus, this I pray
Christmas is heaven with you
Nov 2018 · 1.8k
Your Tears Are Beautiful
Christina S Nov 2018
I stood there, posed at a photo shoot
The sun was shining in my eyes
not knowing why all eyes were on me
The photographer caught me by surprise

"Your tears are beautiful," he said
I quickly patted them away
The sun made my eyes fill with tears
I'll never forget that summer day

It was my first time being the sole focus
And having my hair and makeup done
There was pride and accomplishment
In knowing what I had become

But in those days my deep brown eyes
Could not deny the camera the pain
So naive and young I felt that I just
had to force the dimpled smile and feign

For the people who would see those images
The pictures are a stark reminder of a lost place
But a picture really does speak a thousand words
If I only knew what they could see written on my face

But better times were ahead
I let go of some baggage first thing
The modeling career didn't last but a year
And I met the man who would make my heart sing.
True story of a younger, lost, more naive me.
Nov 2018 · 193
The Hurt
Christina S Nov 2018
It's not as easy to talk about the
love for some reason, as it is the hurt
It's not as easy to remember all the
kind and beautiful things said, than the curt

It does get easier as time passes by
But some days are just so hard to get through
For me, I choose to forgive and forget
all the bad things because I need to

It's taken me many years to get this far
And many tears, I've crossed a deluge of them
But I'm not immune to new pains
Or sadness from which this poem stems

As always, I will be fine, I will be okay
I must press on in the usual way
Maybe the snow left me with the blues
But it won't keep me down one more day
Nov 2018 · 161
Healed My Heart
Christina S Nov 2018
You've comforted me through the rain
Been there for me when I was a bane
Saved me from the oncoming train
Because you know my heart

You've watched me climb to precarious heights
And talked me down till I see the light
You were there for me in my darkest night
Because you know my heart

When the barbed wire encompassed my heart
You were careful to untangle it from the start
Bloodied yourself but did not part
Because you know my heart

Finally, the clouds lifted, and there was you
The injuries and emptiness were gone, it's true
You walked in to hold my hand, on cue
Because you healed my heart
Oct 2018 · 189
His Prowess
Christina S Oct 2018
I acquiesced to your prowess
There was not much I could do
Gave myself to you before the sun rise
All I can do is think of you

Knowledgeable fingertips traverse your body
Every muscle memorized carefully
As if playing a fine instrument
tuned and made just for me

We made beautiful music together
Sounds as old as time
Can't wait for the next symphony
You make sleepless nights divine!
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