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"sedate" poems
People stare at me with confused eyes They ask to know where my secret lies They wonder where I found my gait They love the way I articulate The softness of my arms My captivating youthful charm: This is my woman The woman I have become All these and more, are my woman I walk with a quirky poise People whisper, and it's a delightful noise The smile on my lips The curve of my hips They say I've always been this cool But honey, do not be fooled: This is my woman The woman I have become All these and more, are my woman They see fire in my eyes They say I'm for keeps 'cause I'm a prize There is a grace in my vibes Something good to imbibe The warmth I bring The joy I bring: This is my woman The woman I have become All these and more, are my woman There is something about me How did I come to be? The reason behind my womanly pride The reason for my sedate stride My aura, as that of a beloved emperor My shoulders high like that of a conqueror: This is my woman The woman I have become All these and more, are my woman They say I am a mystery There's definitely more to me In the stillness of my mind In the presence of my kind I become more of the woman I am meant to be The best of me you are yet to see: This is my woman The woman I have become All these and more, are my woman
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Apr 14, 2015
Apr 14, 2015 at 3:29 AM UTC
I AM MY WOMAN
Brain, brain go away Don't want to listen one more day Already lonely and afraid Feel insecure and full of shame Brain, brain don't act this way You're always angry; Filled with hate You know we're joined; Can't separate Yourself your punching in the face Brain, brain what can I say To make it so you see things straight Don't know how much more I can take Of constant warring and debate Brain, brain it's getting late This journey's not some endless race Life's flying by and at this pace Forget a win; Not gonna place Brain, brain let's medicate I'll feed you drugs and we'll sedate The only way to mitigate Discrepancies we generate Brain, brain we sadly waste This outcome feels like it was fate But never was there a sealed date Fulfilling what we self-create Brain, brain so much we faced Success so close could almost taste Instead our tail we always chased We'll die alone sad and disgraced
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Mar 7, 2019
Mar 7, 2019 at 9:48 AM UTC
Brain, brain go away
Arrange my mind's galaxies and planets. Sedate angry asteroids and burning comets. Align for me my heart's constellations. Clear the clouded nebulae in my intentions. Turn the moon gently to look upon me, So I may find the sea of tranquillity...                               Tonight.
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Oct 10, 2014
Oct 10, 2014 at 12:20 PM UTC
Tranquillity
Your suffering is always greater than mine, you claim your fears are bigger. Whine your feelings are better than mine, insist my feelings are simpler. Try to laugh my feats away like a joke, but my will is more forward than yours. Now don’t expect any warmth from me, my spirit won’t be ignored. You think you can quiet my defiance? But I'm used to standing alone. Your ego trips never get old they only harden my resolve. So you timidly try and silence me, then make excuses to escape. ‘Cause your wits won't handle me long, I’m the one you can’t sedate.
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Sep 18, 2017
Sep 18, 2017 at 9:54 PM UTC
Sedate
tiny glowing squares penetrate my retinas and spike into my brain quick-fix pleasure migraine [a drug, almost] six-inch screen turned shrine temple television: be my proxy mother father friend and lover digital aura glow comfort and sedate me: tell me i'm beautiful tell me i'm right tell me you love me tell me you'll never leave my side
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Apr 29, 2014
Apr 29, 2014 at 8:03 AM UTC
::pixelate::
Like a toddler taking maiden steps The narrow stream moves through the woods Tripping and falling over pebbles and boulders Chiming its silver anklets Forcing itself in irrepressible flow It thrusts and shoves its way down Through thickets and a line of ferns And the tangle of creepers and thorny brambles Drowning the whisper of bamboo leaves Its sweet murmur falls in my ears As an eternal living melody The cosmic song heard over eons As the water sluices down the rocks It becomes a frothing braided torrent Producing a harsh grating roar Like the crescendo of a tribal symphony There it forms into a small pool With its waves gently rippling Where birds merrily come to take a dip And sunning their feathers, fly back refreshed Sometimes travelling unseen It suddenly emerges into the open Cutting its way through cracks and fissures Never willing to surrender before hurdles With a bearing immaculate in grace It sends out waves of pure delight What joy it is to watch the dilly dally Of this sedate pilgrim moving to its destination
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May 9, 2016
May 9, 2016 at 10:07 AM UTC
A Stream in the Woods
I am a fœtus Swimming in darkness Oblivious to the world around me I am a new born Opening my eyes for the first time Taking my first breathe Crying the first of many tears Confused by my sight and the light around me I am a toddler Crawling my way across a universe made of shapes sounds colors Overdose of senses Too many things happening simultaneously I Just stare around and try to make sense of this madness I am a child Taking my first step into childhood by standing upright And walking around the world on my own two feet It's the first of many steps I will move forward to take over the world With my eyes ears hands nose mouth Overdose of senses I am a teenager Feeling my heart break for the first time A broken friendship A broken love Deception in human kind For the first time I wonder why Why are we here? If we suffer so much and so intensly My heart breaks and I cry and I shake and I have no idea what is happening Overdose of senses I am a young adult Wondering about the future for the very first time Where I fit in Will I fit in How do I fit in What will I do for the rest of my life? Overdose of questions I am an adult Worrying about taxes and marriage and kids I have settled down I have a career and I look back On the days all the things that mattered were grades and friends I am happy but is this the life I dreamed of? Or did I settle for less than I wanted? What would happen if I left it all now? Overdose of questions I am an old grandma Relaxing eveyr morning with a cup of coffee Next to the man who shared my life for so long I look back on life and realize I am happy I have made choices that lead me here and now I Am happy Overdose of emotions I am a senile grandma No one claims me anymore I am in a care home where most people don't care I am one of many and I look back on my life everynight when the demons come and visit me So I yell out in hopelessness and they sedate me I am faced with loneliness and there are so many things I wish I had done Overdose of emotions Heart attack No heartbeat I am dead.
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Oct 6, 2014
Oct 6, 2014 at 8:10 AM UTC
Life in a poem
I am a fœtus Swimming in darkness Oblivious to the world around me I am a new born Opening my eyes for the first time Taking my first breathe Crying the first of many tears Confused by my sight and the light around me I am a toddler Crawling my way across a universe made of shapes sounds colors Overdose of senses Too many things happening simultaneously I Just stare around and try to make sense of this madness I am a child Taking my first step into childhood by standing upright And walking around the world on my own two feet It's the first of many steps I will move forward to take over the world With my eyes ears hands nose mouth Overdose of senses I am a teenager Feeling my heart break for the first time A broken friendship A broken love Deception in human kind For the first time I wonder why Why are we here? If we suffer so much and so intensly My heart breaks and I cry and I shake and I have no idea what is happening Overdose of senses I am a young adult Wondering about the future for the very first time Where I fit in Will I fit in How do I fit in What will I do for the rest of my life? Overdose of questions I am an adult Worrying about taxes and marriage and kids I have settled down I have a career and I look back On the days all the things that mattered were grades and friends I am happy but is this the life I dreamed of? Or did I settle for less than I wanted? What would happen if I left it all now? Overdose of questions I am an old grandma Relaxing eveyr morning with a cup of coffee Next to the man who shared my life for so long I look back on life and realize I am happy I have made choices that lead me here and now I Am happy Overdose of emotions I am a senile grandma No one claims me anymore I am in a care home where most people don't care I am one of many and I look back on my life everynight when the demons come and visit me So I yell out in hopelessness and they sedate me I am faced with loneliness and there are so many things I wish I had done Overdose of emotions Heart attack No heartbeat I am dead.
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63
i. Tis, tis, the first Christmas With mine queen; Tis, it is, mi amour And her king. ii. Tis, though distances Shalt separate; Verily I sayest Mine Reyna, Thou art Right in mine Heart and soul. Tis this is ourn Fate. iii. Soon O' soon, we shalt Hath a dinner date; With yellow roses to Wrap thine neck, And mine kisses To become to thee, As peaceful sedate. iv. As tis, I wilt wait In death, or in life To bow on one knee, To court thee mine queen; To maketh thee in person v. Mine queen and mine wife..... ©Brandon Nagley ©Lonesome poet's poetry ©Earl Jane Nagley dedicated ( Filipino rose)
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Dec 25, 2015
Dec 25, 2015 at 4:16 PM UTC
Pasko una uban kaninyo( Christmas first with you) cebuano tongue
~Your lips sedate me~ and your arms Your arms provide Comfort as my body My body provides Security
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Aug 2, 2013
Aug 2, 2013 at 3:22 PM UTC
Cuddle
Probe me antagonists, For I am no longer afraid- Of your shunning or your lynching, Or stoning, or blade. You all stare with luscious eyes, Jealous, cruel-fiends. Malicious and vindictive, Hating by all means. Under the sheets- Gasping beyond belief, You kick me, I can not breath. No longer am I easy, No longer  tease to please. Sick with rage and frustration, Consumed like a disease. I know when you lie to me, The only question is why? Who said you could judge? Who made you GOD when they died? Stare at me, look into my eyes! Oh how I trusted you and you made me cry! Let down, alone I crumble by his side. Running from reality, he holds me at night. When silent sobs seep from inside. I wanna scream, but instead I hide. And sedate myself from your hellish wealth, And your perfect life, And your easy ride. I'm alone and I'm fine. I do not need you to pry. Or to pity me as I die. Twisted and dismayed; I am ****** but definitely unafraid. Foolish and used, Ill live to see another day. And the pain you caused will finally fade. And the love we knew will be replaced. I'm moving on and out of place. I don't need you, or your approving face. And all of its grace. Your drama and chilling pace- Graphic and slow, savor the chase. God what a waste. People just love to hate. 'Round and 'round, Stuck in their rut of a mental state. Dyeing, hell-bent on leaving a trace, On hurting and watching me break. Karma neither is predictable, Nor is it fast. One day you'll bear the burden And the pain of an outcast.
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Jun 22, 2010
Jun 22, 2010 at 2:35 PM UTC
Outcast
Probe me antagonists, For I am no longer afraid- Of your shunning or your lynching, Or stoning, or blade. You all stare with luscious eyes, Jealous, cruel-fiends. Malicious and vindictive, Hating by all means. Under the sheets- Gasping beyond belief, You kick me, I can not breath. No longer am I easy, No longer  tease to please. Sick with rage and frustration, Consumed like a disease. I know when you lie to me, The only question is why? Who said you could judge? Who made you GOD when they died? Stare at me, look into my eyes! Oh how I trusted you and you made me cry! Let down, alone I crumble by his side. Running from reality, he holds me at night. When silent sobs seep from inside. I wanna scream, but instead I hide. And sedate myself from your hellish wealth, And your perfect life, And your easy ride. I'm alone and I'm fine. I do not need you to pry. Or to pity me as I die. Twisted and dismayed; I am ****** but definitely unafraid. Foolish and used, Ill live to see another day. And the pain you caused will finally fade. And the love we knew will be replaced. I'm moving on and out of place. I don't need you, or your approving face. And all of its grace. Your drama and chilling pace- Graphic and slow, savor the chase. God what a waste. People just love to hate. 'Round and 'round, Stuck in their rut of a mental state. Dyeing, hell-bent on leaving a trace, On hurting and watching me break. Karma neither is predictable, Nor is it fast. One day you'll bear the burden And the pain of an outcast.
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54
a quote of Bernard-Henri Lévy ~~~ the divers’ recovery, diverse, shipwrecked salvage from different locations, auctioned to the highest bidder, tho the excised excerpts are exceptional, none come to do the bidding, for the provenance of words belongs to all, and to none ~~ “so oft we trifle words, expel them from the country of our body, without passport and earnestness, as if they were the cheapest of footnote filler, day tourists, to be treated as leavings, refuse for daily discardation, barely noting their fast comings and faster disappearance, but leaving not, a mark of distinction” “the addicted pleasure words granted to we privileged few, like every enslaved soul to the mind, which I am, I am, evening dreams, midnight thinkings, sunrise seeings, how can I infect and thus protect the young to the liberty to love the crafted content of our human essence to better comprehend that a moment caught on tape of our shared words is a holiday, a celebration for the ages...and every molecule, becomes a human tuning fork in concert, in pitch identical, in blood tainted with the simplicity of we are all the same, only words, this will transmit” “murmur me, with soft downy charms, these words discovered recoursed and intended well to pointedly offset and contradict their very own tumultuous discovery uncovering, tear tongue me with calming, lapping word  wages, hymns harmonious and fine homilies, a call, a request, a bequest to sedate my shrill life “some cells, microscopic, preserved digitally, aged to imperfection, thrash my eyes, making me speak in tongues I do not recognize, but fluently possess, no wonder there, the memory place fairly empty, room aplenty for passerby's and the imagery                                                          ­ of the vaguest of dearly departed skin is not the only mot shed,                                                 sloughing of woeful words” “speak them slow and distinct, for they arrive slow to you, a trickling of refugees for your sheltering, harbor them as full companions, protected by natural law, provision them well, prepared and ever ready for a quick departure, moor these words at the embarcadero, for the next restless leg of endlessness, which they themselves will inform you will last longer than eternity, long after there are no humans to speak them”
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Mar 27, 2019
Mar 27, 2019 at 4:55 AM UTC
“diving into the depths of my words”
a quote of Bernard-Henri Lévy ~~~ the divers’ recovery, diverse, shipwrecked salvage from different locations, auctioned to the highest bidder, tho the excised excerpts are exceptional, none come to do the bidding, for the provenance of words belongs to all, and to none ~~ “so oft we trifle words, expel them from the country of our body, without passport and earnestness, as if they were the cheapest of footnote filler, day tourists, to be treated as leavings, refuse for daily discardation, barely noting their fast comings and faster disappearance, but leaving not, a mark of distinction” “the addicted pleasure words granted to we privileged few, like every enslaved soul to the mind, which I am, I am, evening dreams, midnight thinkings, sunrise seeings, how can I infect and thus protect the young to the liberty to love the crafted content of our human essence to better comprehend that a moment caught on tape of our shared words is a holiday, a celebration for the ages...and every molecule, becomes a human tuning fork in concert, in pitch identical, in blood tainted with the simplicity of we are all the same, only words, this will transmit” “murmur me, with soft downy charms, these words discovered recoursed and intended well to pointedly offset and contradict their very own tumultuous discovery uncovering, tear tongue me with calming, lapping word  wages, hymns harmonious and fine homilies, a call, a request, a bequest to sedate my shrill life “some cells, microscopic, preserved digitally, aged to imperfection, thrash my eyes, making me speak in tongues I do not recognize, but fluently possess, no wonder there, the memory place fairly empty, room aplenty for passerby's and the imagery                                                          ­ of the vaguest of dearly departed skin is not the only mot shed,                                                 sloughing of woeful words” “speak them slow and distinct, for they arrive slow to you, a trickling of refugees for your sheltering, harbor them as full companions, protected by natural law, provision them well, prepared and ever ready for a quick departure, moor these words at the embarcadero, for the next restless leg of endlessness, which they themselves will inform you will last longer than eternity, long after there are no humans to speak them”
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58
Making deliv-eries, drugs of every kind. Got some that will sedate you, and some that will blow your mind. Making deliv-eries, just trying to ply my trade. Since i started selling drugs, can't believe the friends I've made. Everyone is eager, bound to big you up. All in a selfish, downward spiral, trying to get ****** up. The glamour and the tragedy, of people in the gutter. But now I'm selling drugs, it is my bread and butter. Got to turn it over, and try to make a buck. Couple of quid short, here and there .. but I don't give a **** Making my deliv-eries, police not far behind. Put my **** on the line, in a bid to blow your mind. Flashing lights, neon blue, right upon my tail. They're about to pull me over, I'm about to go to jail. ( (c) P Skez 04/01/2014)
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May 2, 2014
May 2, 2014 at 2:33 PM UTC
Deliveries
Prologue casual glance at my notifications while driving even though I’m all ready a bad bad boy, cruising at a sedate, cruise-controlled 70 mph  vs. the bureaucrat bifocals 55, a remnant regulation of the Eighties, all the while humming with Gilligan “a 3 hour tour, 2 passengers set sail that day” then execute a four lane 180, gotta get highway sideway grassed , cause i’m gassed... by a Poem Breach of the poems promised by me, to write of thee, you, my best inspiration, the list grows longer, faster than the hours provided pull over fast emergency for my composure breached, my vision wetted, my eyes hit by an unplanned unexpected, sudden summer thunderstorm <•> The Poem Breach ***once more into the breach thy words breeze through my chest, like on a flamed stick, night roasting, toasting beach summer marshmallows, that cut direct to the ineffable sadness that resides resists within, that sticky, white mess, a human heart melting a thank you message that I’ve read before, many times more than once, how my unasked poem, a sun unique, arrived at the precise time and place, to lift and even save, how could I’ve know? I did not know but these messages collect on my chest, unsought words of purple ribbon metal that make a less burdened cowardly lion, grown man cry, do crazy things for it is a possible solution to his age old quest Why do I exist, is this my purposed plan, don’t understand, all but the answer peaked and peaceful accepted in the breach unreasoned, my port of entry, a gateway to the scales, a bridge it is, over a time-life river styx and unstuck, yet certainly always confused...*** “It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known.” thank you so insufficient
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Jul 21, 2018
Jul 21, 2018 at 11:56 AM UTC
that poem breach
Prologue casual glance at my notifications while driving even though I’m all ready a bad bad boy, cruising at a sedate, cruise-controlled 70 mph  vs. the bureaucrat bifocals 55, a remnant regulation of the Eighties, all the while humming with Gilligan “a 3 hour tour, 2 passengers set sail that day” then execute a four lane 180, gotta get highway sideway grassed , cause i’m gassed... by a Poem Breach of the poems promised by me, to write of thee, you, my best inspiration, the list grows longer, faster than the hours provided pull over fast emergency for my composure breached, my vision wetted, my eyes hit by an unplanned unexpected, sudden summer thunderstorm <•> The Poem Breach ***once more into the breach thy words breeze through my chest, like on a flamed stick, night roasting, toasting beach summer marshmallows, that cut direct to the ineffable sadness that resides resists within, that sticky, white mess, a human heart melting a thank you message that I’ve read before, many times more than once, how my unasked poem, a sun unique, arrived at the precise time and place, to lift and even save, how could I’ve know? I did not know but these messages collect on my chest, unsought words of purple ribbon metal that make a less burdened cowardly lion, grown man cry, do crazy things for it is a possible solution to his age old quest Why do I exist, is this my purposed plan, don’t understand, all but the answer peaked and peaceful accepted in the breach unreasoned, my port of entry, a gateway to the scales, a bridge it is, over a time-life river styx and unstuck, yet certainly always confused...*** “It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known.” thank you so insufficient
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46
I am The Funny Man I'm here to make you laugh I'm the clown behind the sentence It's the one disguise I have I am The Funny Man I'm on at your request The keyboard spreads my message I'll try to do my best I don't know who I am though Am I funny or sedate By the time I find the answer It may just be too late I am The Funny Man On strings that you control I am your funny puppet Being funny makes me whole I am The Funny Man Dancing at top speed I live to hear the laughter It"s the laughter that i need I don't know who I am though Am I funny or sedate By the time I find the answer It may just be too late I am The Funny Man I crave to be on top I don't know how exactly To make the funny stop I am The Funny Man Yes, that's just who I am Half clown and half man And you don't give a **** I don't know who I am though Am I funny or sedate By the time I find the answer It may just be too late
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May 12, 2012
May 12, 2012 at 8:59 PM UTC
The Funny Man
i. Cap-a-pie I loveth thee; Mine own, mine self Mine whole, mine queen. ii. Lashes and eyes I loveth thee; Mine home, mine help Best friend, and dream. iii. Leg's and thighs I loveth thee; Mine girl, mine world Mine living, breathing. iv. Spirit and mind I loveth thee; I giveth mineself, To thee in sickness Or wealth, in good Times or bad health. v. Marry and sedate Me in passionate Meed; thou art Mine want, thou Art mine yearning, Mine longing, Mine need. vi. Cap-a-pie Mine Queen; ©Brandon Nagley ©Lonesome poet's poetry ©Earl Jane Nagley dedicated ( Filipino rose)
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Jan 1, 2016
Jan 1, 2016 at 2:51 PM UTC
Cap-a-pie ( Head to toe) Shakespeare toungue
The twilight turns from amethyst To deep and deeper blue, The lamp fills with a pale green glow The trees of the avenue. The old piano plays an air, Sedate and slow and gay; She bends upon the yellow keys, Her head inclines this way. Shy thought and grave wide eyes and hands That wander as they list -- - The twilight turns to darker blue With lights of amethyst.
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3.3k
The Twilight Turns
I wonder whats so appealing about demons and their temptations Or about characters who don't quite have their stories straight Claiming the day is to come but never actually sets a date Lost in a trail of their own confusion In the hopes they might sedate it But with the path of destruction left in their wake They couldn't help but feel ashamed, right? I mean, don't you? You couldn't be so foolish Or be so heartless To realize this isn’t right You only surpass me in age by a year and yet You’ve become quite bitter I try to understand but to be this lost Is simply lost to me I'm told to just try to understand that we all have demons But must they manifest in this nature? Then demand the respect of your allies with disrespect It makes no sense Do you see how vulnerable a piece is when the pawns are gone Don't you hate feeling like you're all alone? I truly wonder if you get it though, Because its truly sad to see Especially that day you spoke to me I saw someone who wanted to become accepted You just went about it the wrong way and I can’t help but wonder what lead you so astray? Whether it be a troubled past or you just like to be a pain in the *** I hope you find some peace In this chaotic battlefield you call life.
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Jul 8, 2014
Jul 8, 2014 at 1:03 PM UTC
Unspoken Words
Walking into the Reception Hall, they stole the show away, A regal pair they were, with a little bit of Butch and Sundance swagger shown. A confident air, not at all underserved. Dressed with just enough elegance. Their posture and hue , sleek and silky golden, like a duet of Cheetahs. Eyes alert and searching for prey. Alert for danger. Like a herd of antelope, all heads turned to look, The men perhaps out of desire, the women staring envy at them, Like the twin bores of a loaded gun. Mother and fetching daughter, From twenty feet, hard to tell which, one was one, or the other. Long blond hair, full and fine, both women tall, statuesque, moving with grace and ease. The mother my old friend, the daughter all grown up now, each having a smile that would light up anyone's darkness of mood. We greeted one another, hugs and hand shakes shared. A little conversation in the crowded room, Many pairs of eyes upon us there. Enchanted is the word that best describes my impression, this duo as intelligent and charming as they were beautiful to see. The mother sedate, classy and yet open and free, no pretense, no games just naturally at ease. As lovely as I remembered her to be. Her offspring, vivacious, spirited and bold, smart as whip, with a tongue that could draw blood if she desired it to. Chatty and funny, sure of herself, in the manner of beautiful people, yet not in a pompous way, merely Confident in self and her place in the world. She possessed all the character traits you would wish your own daughter to have. Her Mother had done well is raising her. Too soon they moved on, meeting and greeting others', out of my hearing and seeing. Some weeks have passed, a month or two and yet their strong impression has lingered, I can't keep them out of my mind. The Mother, my friend most of all.
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Nov 18, 2013
Nov 18, 2013 at 3:11 PM UTC
Mother and Daughter
Walking into the Reception Hall, they stole the show away, A regal pair they were, with a little bit of Butch and Sundance swagger shown. A confident air, not at all underserved. Dressed with just enough elegance. Their posture and hue , sleek and silky golden, like a duet of Cheetahs. Eyes alert and searching for prey. Alert for danger. Like a herd of antelope, all heads turned to look, The men perhaps out of desire, the women staring envy at them, Like the twin bores of a loaded gun. Mother and fetching daughter, From twenty feet, hard to tell which, one was one, or the other. Long blond hair, full and fine, both women tall, statuesque, moving with grace and ease. The mother my old friend, the daughter all grown up now, each having a smile that would light up anyone's darkness of mood. We greeted one another, hugs and hand shakes shared. A little conversation in the crowded room, Many pairs of eyes upon us there. Enchanted is the word that best describes my impression, this duo as intelligent and charming as they were beautiful to see. The mother sedate, classy and yet open and free, no pretense, no games just naturally at ease. As lovely as I remembered her to be. Her offspring, vivacious, spirited and bold, smart as whip, with a tongue that could draw blood if she desired it to. Chatty and funny, sure of herself, in the manner of beautiful people, yet not in a pompous way, merely Confident in self and her place in the world. She possessed all the character traits you would wish your own daughter to have. Her Mother had done well is raising her. Too soon they moved on, meeting and greeting others', out of my hearing and seeing. Some weeks have passed, a month or two and yet their strong impression has lingered, I can't keep them out of my mind. The Mother, my friend most of all.
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54
I think I understand hookups and one-night stands now. The key to moving on is to replace all that stood before until there stands nothing that may cause you to unravel. Moment by moment, conversation by conversation,   I replace the replays, I can't bear the thought of another touching me, like I'm not yours. I got another ring today, all big and loose. It's funny how I picked this one, it keeps slipping off my fingers like you did. It's been two months since I last wore your ring. I don't see a difference between them, it feels the same on my thumb. and that should be the end of it, but oh well, I guess it isn't. I walked to the grocery store, paused at an aisle, took my time frowning over chocolate bars. You used to get me Munch, and so I picked the Mars bar. I don't skip meals now, (well, most days I don't) and in place of our routine conversations, I play a random show. I drown noise with noise. My days are decent. I'm surrounded by mindless jibber jabber. I participate. I paste a bright smile. “You look well now,” they say, “Well, I am” I reply. And I am fine. (I think I am?) 9/10 times I am. Then in a random mundane moment, memories of you resurface like a ring light and in that single moment, I let myself crumble. “I don't want him back. He's changed now. So have you and so what? If it's meant to be, it'll be. He's the love of my life. Well don't let him in, when (not if) he comes back. Do it from love, not for it. You deserve happiness. Both of you do. You want love. You are love. The ocean doesn't look for its water, Why will you look for what you have? It is what it is. and this too shall pass.” So on and so forth my inner monologue goes on, and I stare at my phone wondering if I can conjure you from my thoughts. I am kinder now. With myself, and everyone around. I wish I were kinder to you, but I was just a child. I know you're proud, and I am of you too. Do you think I can sculpt my favourite version of you? Wait, no. I already did that, I loved all of you and then everything fell apart. My thoughts swirl and I let them play. Incantations in my head Obligatory 3 am, weary sighs, contempt and rage. Oh, so much rage. Where is the calming lull of sleep, when you need it to sedate your despair? Resignation sets in, I play a familiar game. I ask the universe and unbiasedly it delivers the same day. "Universe, give me a sign, I'm really done this time. Yellow flowers if he's coming back, Dandelions if he's not. Universe let me move on. This is the last time, " In my version of He loves me, he loves me not I break flowers, not petals. I look for answers in colours and not action, And then I saw a dozen Dandelions.
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Jan 17, 2024
Jan 17, 2024 at 4:40 PM UTC
Sunflowers and Chrysanthemums
I think I understand hookups and one-night stands now. The key to moving on is to replace all that stood before until there stands nothing that may cause you to unravel. Moment by moment, conversation by conversation,   I replace the replays, I can't bear the thought of another touching me, like I'm not yours. I got another ring today, all big and loose. It's funny how I picked this one, it keeps slipping off my fingers like you did. It's been two months since I last wore your ring. I don't see a difference between them, it feels the same on my thumb. and that should be the end of it, but oh well, I guess it isn't. I walked to the grocery store, paused at an aisle, took my time frowning over chocolate bars. You used to get me Munch, and so I picked the Mars bar. I don't skip meals now, (well, most days I don't) and in place of our routine conversations, I play a random show. I drown noise with noise. My days are decent. I'm surrounded by mindless jibber jabber. I participate. I paste a bright smile. “You look well now,” they say, “Well, I am” I reply. And I am fine. (I think I am?) 9/10 times I am. Then in a random mundane moment, memories of you resurface like a ring light and in that single moment, I let myself crumble. “I don't want him back. He's changed now. So have you and so what? If it's meant to be, it'll be. He's the love of my life. Well don't let him in, when (not if) he comes back. Do it from love, not for it. You deserve happiness. Both of you do. You want love. You are love. The ocean doesn't look for its water, Why will you look for what you have? It is what it is. and this too shall pass.” So on and so forth my inner monologue goes on, and I stare at my phone wondering if I can conjure you from my thoughts. I am kinder now. With myself, and everyone around. I wish I were kinder to you, but I was just a child. I know you're proud, and I am of you too. Do you think I can sculpt my favourite version of you? Wait, no. I already did that, I loved all of you and then everything fell apart. My thoughts swirl and I let them play. Incantations in my head Obligatory 3 am, weary sighs, contempt and rage. Oh, so much rage. Where is the calming lull of sleep, when you need it to sedate your despair? Resignation sets in, I play a familiar game. I ask the universe and unbiasedly it delivers the same day. "Universe, give me a sign, I'm really done this time. Yellow flowers if he's coming back, Dandelions if he's not. Universe let me move on. This is the last time, " In my version of He loves me, he loves me not I break flowers, not petals. I look for answers in colours and not action, And then I saw a dozen Dandelions.
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It's such the contradiction the way you make me feel like the earth has drunk the whiskey, the sun's sober spill. Tilted on my axis, weaker in my knees I don't exactly grasp the spell you put on me. You sedate me oh so smoothly, like ***** in a glass, My morning mug of coffee, you keep me clear, fast. like clockwork, your lips find mine, and my heart is in your hand sober and intoxicated just like you had planned
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Apr 16, 2014
Apr 16, 2014 at 11:11 PM UTC
Soberly Intoxicated
. I know this place, light stone avenues, fig, pear, apricot and apple, trees that line in rows, cut paving with neat gutters **** white granite buildings, as ferns and creepers cascade from roof gardens, the green shining vivid in appreciation of being alive. And I connect across the aeons, this place was my home, from centuries long passed, yet reaching out to be found. The avenues mimic my mind, long straight and narrow, broad and winding, leading to sedate squares to sit and feel the sun, to bathe in beautiful isolation. And the trees sway casually in a breeze so soft, it caresses the branches, enough to tickle the leaves and cool the ripening fruit. Here, the forest erupts, circles around this sanctuary, forming a natural hedge to this garden of tranquility, this oasis in the maelstrom, this home in my heart. Flowers of honeysuckle, jasmine, of clovers and lily, adorn walls and buildings, bright in contrast to the shadows of the trees, bloom with the intensity of colour, riotous in hue and arrangement, yet, ordered to Nature's Law. Paradise wrapped in image, slicing through time and space, my place a thousand years ago, my place to claim forever, and the wind carries me home, I know this place, because it lives inside of me, because I made it. © Pagan Paul (06/06/18)
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Jun 7, 2018
Jun 7, 2018 at 1:09 PM UTC
Secret Garden
Eventually we'll get implants to sedate and make us compliant. There is no choice here we have to fight them, be defiant buck the system.
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May 7, 2017
May 7, 2017 at 3:32 PM UTC
Pacifiers
It was the early days of the organic food craze and my wife, ever a slave to the latest fads (which disposition sometimes benefitted me pleasurably but mostly cost me dearly) made me run on an errand (like: “Fido – go, fetch!”) to get some organic vegetables and arriving, I blurted out to the produce guy, stumbling: *“Some ****** for my wife”* – and that wise guy, Oxford-educated as he was (though a failed Professor, so ended up at the greengrocer’s) he said: *“That you must induce or encourage in your wife, Sir; I cannot and will not be of service in that connection.”* And I slowed down and I said: “Well, dear fellow – for my wife, have you any organic vegetables?” And Oxford-educated as he was, he did not understand such fads having mostly a sedate and Classical demeanour and he pointed his most English nose to the air; and so I attempted again to sensible-phrase my inquiry: *“Are your vegetables - and this I ask on account of my esteemed wife - sprayed with poisonous chemicals?”* And the Oxford guy apprehended now, and he pronounced: *“Poisonous chemicals for your spouse you must procure yourself, Sir”* Now, that was an idea. I knew Oxford-educated guys were smart in some way or other. And since then I have been free of my wife. I have no need to run on errands for no baby, no more; though I do have to count bars, limited as my numerical skills are, as is my verbal proficiency. And the Oxford guy, meanwhile, I have it from the grapevine, has set up an ******** Food Chain Store*, worldwide; I knew he’d go places, sooner or later, far and global
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Jul 9, 2013
Jul 9, 2013 at 8:06 AM UTC
organic food for my wife
It was the early days of the organic food craze and my wife, ever a slave to the latest fads (which disposition sometimes benefitted me pleasurably but mostly cost me dearly) made me run on an errand (like: “Fido – go, fetch!”) to get some organic vegetables and arriving, I blurted out to the produce guy, stumbling: *“Some ****** for my wife”* – and that wise guy, Oxford-educated as he was (though a failed Professor, so ended up at the greengrocer’s) he said: *“That you must induce or encourage in your wife, Sir; I cannot and will not be of service in that connection.”* And I slowed down and I said: “Well, dear fellow – for my wife, have you any organic vegetables?” And Oxford-educated as he was, he did not understand such fads having mostly a sedate and Classical demeanour and he pointed his most English nose to the air; and so I attempted again to sensible-phrase my inquiry: *“Are your vegetables - and this I ask on account of my esteemed wife - sprayed with poisonous chemicals?”* And the Oxford guy apprehended now, and he pronounced: *“Poisonous chemicals for your spouse you must procure yourself, Sir”* Now, that was an idea. I knew Oxford-educated guys were smart in some way or other. And since then I have been free of my wife. I have no need to run on errands for no baby, no more; though I do have to count bars, limited as my numerical skills are, as is my verbal proficiency. And the Oxford guy, meanwhile, I have it from the grapevine, has set up an ******** Food Chain Store*, worldwide; I knew he’d go places, sooner or later, far and global
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1170 Nature affects to be sedate Upon occasion, grand But let our observation shut Her practices extend To Necromancy and the Trades Remote to understand Behold our spacious Citizen Unto a Juggler turned—
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2.2k
Nature affects to be sedate
Stung by an angling fad He took a fishing rod And sallied onto the nearby stream That leaped down a rocky shelf Forming small cascades But running down into plain ground With a placid demure face Uttering soft murmurs sweet Aiming at the darting Trout That made the still waters into spiraling whirls He swished the rod in the air With the alacrity of a practiced bowler Looking at the line sinking low He waited for the fish to nibble at the bait Meanwhile, inhaling the salubrious air And watching the limpid movement of the stream As the hook line went taut in his grip Hopefully he pulled it up But alas! With no ***** to boast! Patiently sat he there for hours Like a sculptured God upon a rock Oh! It requires immense patience With adroitness to boot To be an angler, no doubt That sure is a sedate man’s pursuit! Angling rarely fetches any major luck Except now and then a fresh fish upon one’s plate Yet following one’s heart’s pursuit Is worth more than all tangible reward it brings!
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Jun 8, 2016
Jun 8, 2016 at 12:14 PM UTC
Angling