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Jan Jan 17
I think I understand hookups and one-night stands now.
The key to moving on is to replace until there's nothing to unravel upon.

I mean, It's fair.
I do it too.
Moment by moment,
conversation by conversation,  
I replace the replays,
and that is about as far as I'll go.
I can't bear the thought
of another touching me, like I'm not yours.

I got another ring today,
All big and loose.
Funny how I picked this one,
it keeps falling out.

It's been two months since I stopped wearing yours,
I honestly don't see a difference in the way it fits on my thumb.
That should be the end of it, but oh well, I guess it isn't.

I walked to the grocery store, paused at an aisle,
took my time frowning over chocolate bars.
You used to get me Munch, so I picked the KitKat.

I don't skip meals now, (well, most days I don't)
and in place of our routine conversations, I let a random show run in the background.

I drown noise with noise.

My days are decent.
I'm surrounded by mindless jibber jabber.
I participate.
I paste a bright smile.

“You look well now,” they say, “Well I am” I reply.

And as a matter of fact, I am fine.
9/10 times I am.

Then in a random mundane moment, memories of you resurface like a ring light and
in that single moment,
I let myself crumble.

“I don't want him back.
He isn't the same person anymore.
I'm not even me anymore.

If it's meant to be, it'll be.
He's the love of my life.
Well don't let him in,
when (not if) he comes back.

Do it from love, not for it.
You deserve happiness.
Both of you do.

You want love.
You are love.
The ocean doesn't look for its water,
Why will you look for what you have?

It is what it is.
and this too shall pass.”

So on and so forth my inner monologue goes,
and I stare at my phone wondering if I can conjure you from my thoughts.

I am kinder now. With myself, and everyone around.
I know you're proud,
and I kind of wish you'd say it to loud.

Can I possibly wrung out my favourite version of you, this time?

My thoughts swirl and I let them play.
Incantations in my head
Obligatory 3 am, weary sighs, contempt and pure rage.

Where is the calming lull of sleep, when you really need it to sedate your despair?

Resignation sets in, I play a familiar game.
I ask the universe and unbiasedly it delivers the same day.

"Universe, give me a sign, I'm really done this time.
Yellow flowers if he's coming back,
Dandelions if he's not.
Universe let me move on. This is the last time, "

In my version of He loves me, he loves me not
I break flowers, not petals.
I look for answers in colours and not action.
Hi, I hope your well. Know that I'm extremely proud of you and you're in my thoughts.
All my love to you,
~Jan
ky Jul 2023
We never really knew each other.

Sure, we texted nonstop.
You stared at me in the halls.
But missed chances and glances were all we had.
We never had a real conversation.
(Maybe things would have been different if we did.)

All my memories of you
consist of my face lit by a bright screen,
sitting in the darkness of my bedroom,
wishing for you—desperately—at 11:11.
RyanMJenkins Aug 2021
This is me now, coming forth from the clouds.  Recharging in silence, fully-powered I follow sounds.  Taking on a new form - had to once I outgrew the space allowed.  I've truly bloomed since my heart was locked in the dark and hostile underground.
Hades once hated me but never tried to vanquish me.  He tried to force nightmares on his subjects that I would replace with sweet dreams.  His ears would steam from not understanding.  I found the key, and my heart was released. I broke free and floated away with Persephone, happily.  Be wary of intentions behind the pomegranate seeds.  Listen to your heart, that beat lead me to where I needed to be.  True story.
Happy Eleven11
Sawyer Feb 2021
what did I wish for
at 11:11?

A million things, maybe, but none of them real.
They were barely wishes at all, just half-baked
whispers on this dead tongue.

what wish came true
at 11:11?

None of them, I think, for all of them
were said out loud. My mouth can only hold them
for so long before it bursts.

who heard me speak
at 11:11?

No one, I think, or everyone.
I can’t be sure (if it matters) who
was still awake.

“I wish,” I said, but I never finished.

what voice wished their half-wishes
at 11:11,
and was quiet again at 11:12.
Mystic Ink Plus Nov 2020
No one knows
What love is
Until the freefall
Genre: Minimalist
Theme: Nothing to everything
Stevie Nov 2020
We remember the fallen,
The generation that fought,
That answered the calling,
Giving each generation after the war,
A mind, a voice of a second thought.

We won't remember the fallen,
Of this generation, respect them not,
The answer to the offensive,
Lies and giving each other fake hope,
Who in this generation can scream I will stand on the defensive line,
In War and not on the we are insulted line.

Yes, born 1990, known as a millennial,
I have no respect for most of them,
Even most of the Generation Z.
Respect for the Boomers and Generation Alpha's,
They have a hard life, no Technology,
Educated and well traversed,
Survived and shaped the World, as we know,
With mistake made and learned.
Where the technology age,
Leaves the uneducated and cursed,
Creating and shaping the world into a wasteland,
Mistake are maded and not learning.
dailythoughts Oct 2020
the moon burns brighter glaring at me
shamelessly shying away on your name
my only wish
do you believe in it?
if this time around,
you knew it would come true,
what would you wish for?

it never hurt anyone to try
and believe so you tell yourself,
“even just a sliver of hope
in it won’t **** you.”

wishes are meant to be kept secret
so i’ll whisper it to myself
wishing you all the happiness and love in the world
with or without me in it.

i love you enough to want the best for you
and here i will always save my wishes for you.
I think of you every time. Shooting stars and 11:11, it doesn't hurt to believe in something even for a little bit. I care for you more than you know, I will always make my wishes for you and I always hope for my wishes to come true.
fray narte Feb 2020
My 11:11s were made for sleepless nights
playing back all these scenes
when your heartbeat still melted against my ears,
every sigh that lingered on my temple,
every touch that lingered on my skin
11:11s were made for asking
this dimmed wall sconces what it would be like
to feel your body close the spaces,
to feel it next to mine once more,
of what it would be like to kiss you in the dark,
with complete abandonment,
like a wolf howling its heart out
to the moon after a sunset that lasted forever

It was 11:11, and now, I know
I should’ve closed my eyes
and kissed you that drunken April night,
and melted in your arms when I still had the chance.
Now, I close them, without you around,
wrestling with these fixations
trying to convince myself
that one more recall of the memories would be the last;
one more make-believe,
one more fantasy wouldn't hurt.
One more,

and one more,
and one more,
I said,

and it was 11:12
and suddenly,

it did.
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