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.Sanctuary.
I offered it to you
And everyone
Anyone
When it was meant for me all along
.

Someone save me from my own understanding
I let the words pour out of me
Like slicing open a vein
Blood letting, to rid me of the disease
In repetitive disdain I’m dissed again
What a lewd thought to think it would let me go

Still, a flailing hope
A grasp of desperation
as my essence drains from the inner highways of my heart
A hope that it may heal the hurt
That maybe somehow the delivering and uttering
of pen and paper will relieve me
Please, just a little relief from the agony within
A cathartic reverence that will send me into a seizure
For a life that’s seized is my daily torment
A ravage beast who tore through men
and me just a boy
A white rabbit for the slaughter

And with Dr. Lecter psychotic patience
You did not devour me quick
Took your time
A new toy
Minutes turned into hours
your playful taunt and tease
To the unknowing
A provocative game entrenched in innocence and desire
I know, to juxtapose the two is almost paradoxical
Only a dark spirit, a shadow wraith, an entity of the night
can deliver such torture and delight

A delicious tour makes me quiver
both with fear and excitement
Fire and ice
Drops of hot wax while bathing in ice cubes
You bath me with your love
You burn me with your spice
When I wince or flinch
I see upon your face
With satisfaction a smile appears
Grinning broadly from ear to ear

Wrapped around your finger
as if there ever was a doubt
Eons gone and warped through space
my mind you warp
my thoughts you erase
Like a hunting trophy hung to dry the flesh
Both arms and legs are bound up tight
There I’m hung, served up for you upon a dish

Blood cut off, feels like atrophy in my tissue
I am your servant offering no service
A visceral charge within me
The rushing thrill of fear
I see the blood in your eyes
the fangs in your teeth
but I do not cower away
Lunging towards you for relief
A parasite inside my brain
Narrow sighted
and choosing sides
Forever by your side
Do it now!
I want to feel your fangs sinking deep into me
and drain me of my life force
Taking every drop I have to give

Offered up, I am your nectar
Dancing the line between life and death
A euphoric Hell
wrapped up in your spell
Enslaved to you for eternity
Inserted into the ignition you turned the key
the motor roars
with thunderous sounds
Screams and cackles like wild animals
Deafening shrills
and the most unnatural of notes
until a resounding silence

The storm has passed
but the clouds still remain
The ominous is drifting about
uncertainty with such certainty
A certification given
with a two-ton weight
****** upon my chest
from where you ripped my heart
and now on your pain I live
An accepted compromise

Like an oscillating frequency
or a voyager forever caught between two storms
This is the fate I choose
I will endure the pain and abuse
A tribute to you my love
to show how much I care
Infinite reassurance I must fulfill
but upon fulfilling the role of assurance
No insurance needed
A guarantee
I am splayed out and crucified for you
and our delightful game we play again

My reward; your gifts
A ward to you
at beckoning call
My beacon
My lighthouse
The world had turned black
Living each day in horror
Pulled me from that abyss
only to throw me back in from time to time
but I bide my time
for the time in between
when I’m in between you
The taste of your kiss
A Utopian bliss
You retract
take it away
Like a fiend needing a fix
In agony I miss
No limit
Tear me limb from limb
Rip me apart and make me die in agony!
No price is too great
would pay anything
Give up Kingdoms
for this
Written: February 20, 2018

All rights reserved.

I'm re-releasing this. It was written a while ago and at some point I took it down (I honestly don't know why). I like it and thought I would share. Hopefully you enjoy it.
Amanda Sep 24
Sanctuary found
Support and recognition
Second family
I have been encouraged and appreciated more by these people than I have ever been by my own family. I love every one of my Roadhouse family members from Trisha the owner to Josh the maintenance guy and even all the foreigners and other workers who didn't make it to the end of the season and I am so grateful for the overwhelming love I receive there every single day.

Day 4 of the 30 day poetry challenge (because I was a day behind) write a haiku

Now I am caught up once again
AsianTapWater Aug 21
Ever since that Incident,
My forests have been on edge.

Once gentle vines have turned to snakes,
And attacked all the men who came near.

Child after Child was tortured and killed.
Hole after hole was formed in my heart.

Man after man I hunted down,
Player after Player I forced away.

All that remains of my large family
Is the smallest darling I carry close

Pale mint scales overlap
Smaller, brighter jade.

The scarlet of her irises
Brightens the world around her.

The light of my world.
My sunshine.

I will let nobody hunt you
Or take you away.

There will be nobody to corrupt you,
To mislead you like the rest.

I will keep you safe,
Where nobody can hurt you

Where not even those boys
Can "help" you, as they claim.

I will keep you safe,
Until the Players leave.

Until we can return
To the sanctuary we call "home".
Poem about Volla and her youngest (I believe) Child from the Last Reality series. I don't actually know if the Child has scarlet eyes, maybe it mentions later on in Otherearth, but I guess it's just a headcanon for now.
I feel really bad for Volla, she and the Children didn't deserve any of what they suffered through.
The boys she mentions are Simon and Elvis.
Mamolefe Aug 30
I lay my scalp to rest.
The cushions below it comforting my thoughts and caressing my dreams.
The mattress allowing my guardians and demons to sweep away the dust between my ribs
the webs under my skin.

Home, is where my spirit sleeps.

Where my thoughts become a whimsical fantasy
Where my reality is engulfed within the galaxies

Home, is a place that I cannot see.

A foreign land that feels like my great grandmother's hugs and my mother's cries.
The sphere where my screams match the symphonies that echo through the thick breath of the unknown.
A place where my tears match the rumbles of Kwamata's abode.

A realm where I touch God,
where he kisses my cheeks and reorganises my destiny
through every snooze
every snore.

Home, is where I humbly die and rise.
Home, is where my colourful insides fly.
Home, is the sanctuary between my eyes.
Meghan Aug 1
This is my place of peace
The ocean meets the land after the same interval of time without delay
The steady controlled breaths of a stable planet
The leafy shields of the trees protect me from the fiery glare of the sun
But I still see its light dance across the water in a beautiful ballet of joy
I watch the clouds as they adorn the sky with their abstract art
Red wildflowers sing out through the passive murmur of blue and green surroundings
Their vivid contrast is welcome
There is a stump where I can sit
Where I can read, dream, sing, write, or just be present
There is a stump on either side of me where I can invite a trusted friend or two
To sit with me and appreciate the view
But I know that this place is for me
No one can intrude unless I allow them to
The trees are my guardians
They stand at a respectful distance but never leave their post
I know I’m safe here
I paint this scene to life in my mind whenever I need a sanctuary
Chris Neilson Jul 29
****** of gentle clear running water
over multi coloured mishaped pebbles
after the incessance of yesterdays rain
intermittent leaf drips on my capped head
pleased I left my anxiety bed

this is how it feels to be happy
content to breathe in the moment
surrounded by protective trees
wooden guards abating trouble
strife and worries at the double

a friendly dog stops and joins me
five seconds together watching the world
the owner says she must like me
I assume she's talking about her dog
as we follow the track of a floating log

the stream has evolved to a river today
swelled by the tears of our planet
hurting from humanity's evil toxins
our natural world's existence in doubt
my fears from within meet a future without

late July's heatwave then monsoon
symbolise life's ever changing moods
a graveyard brings timely perspective
to spurn a tempting devil's dance
to live each day as a last chance
I awoke in a dark mood this Monday morning so headed to my local walking sanctuary and wrote the above.
solc liveson Jun 21
on the Earth, some need a heaven and hell above,
which suits the powered up reigning status quo rulers,
promising that by being just and docile,
one will earn frequent flyer life miles
to a destination ticketed & named,
but not by actual visitation,
a return confirmation, never

some take your self-love as their own idea,
reselling it over and over again back to you
but know that when you sing your own song,
the discoverable truth is we all
get to go to sort of a sanctuary,
especially if you record-keep your flaws,
in order to constantly reinvent yourself
in order to

reach some kind of agreement with yourself

human gravity is hard enough to escape so travel light,
shed those skins over and over again,
each a modest  improvement sequentially,
leave your exited charred speech behind,
knockoff the blackened flaking edges, a discarded cutaway,
this way to transcend phony notion redemption requirements,
redemption
is a toxic emblem, a symbol unrequited and a sucker’s play

I am the spirit of another’s name, who, here to teach,
this being today’s lesson;
how to reach your unique
truth sanctuary,
where the stronghold of who you yet-to-be, can-be awaits,
the reinventing ones, successful, some call poets,
they do not confuse redemption requests
with sanctuary
only provisioned
by yourself,
for yourself
ZWS Jun 14
Faux Play

Webs of remorse cover my bed as I stumble back into brambles
A place that acts as a sanctuary but looks like a crumpled napkin
A recluse ******* that concerns no cordials
But those that comfort a king who bellows in his castle
Built high out of stone and assured to one day be ruins
A faux ploy to thou I’ve surrendered built on all of those who I’ve sundered
A war within my own; where ballast meets ballast
And blunder meets blunder
holly Jun 11
my body is sanctuary—
my body is built of stone.
my body is always with me—
why im never alone.
and while it may be
a part of me,
this place is not my home.
this structure of bone and
mysterious matter is truly nothing
but a place to house my mindless chatter.
the rest is but dust,
taking up space to prove I exist—
to show i am more than my madness.
I am a heartbeat,
a brain wave,
a breath.
I am a sister,
a daughter,
a friend.
but I live in a body that
is not my own—
this is not my home and
therefore I may roam.
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