"deleting" poems
Tap tap
Scroll scroll
Click click
Hit like
(they'd probably hit like back)
Excuse me how dare you unfollow me
(here, I'm unfollowing you too)
Um, I really do not like your content
(but I don't wanna lose a follower so there you go)
How did this photo get only 40 likes
(deleting it now)
How did she have so many followers
(all of her posts are *******
Wanna have dinner?
(We can spend 2 hours sitting across each other while our hands are glued to our phones.)
Hey, want to meet up?
(So we can post social media stories to make it look like we're having fun.)
Hi, how was your day?
(Oh wait, I'll just check on your feed.)
Hey, how'd everything go with that job interview you had today?
(Right, I'll just look at your FB status.)
Hi, do you ever wanna talk?
(But you know, on the phone, or like, only online?)
Connect to disconnect
Dec 13, 2018
Dec 13, 2018 at 10:28 PM UTC
You texted me a hello and a Happy New Year
You asked how I was doing and I responded “Doing Well”
I returned your question of “How are you doing”
I followed after with “Did you have a good New Year’s Eve”
You kept your responses simple and vague
You left my second question hanging by only answering with
‘Working a lot’ and stating how happy you were to hear I was doing well
Your short, simple responses gave nothing away
About what has occurred in your life
Since the last time we had a willing and connected conversation
The way you responded left me to wonder
The reason why you contacted me
Your distant responses made it very clear
That this would be the last time you and I would ever talk
This is the end of the two of us
The end of you and I
The end of any possibility of you and I being one
As I quietly sit in the Marketing Room
Thinking about the obvious next step
I waiver on my decision to delete your number off my Blackberry forever
I questioned whether I would regret this decision
Then an old quote by Khalil Gibran came to me:
“If you love somebody let them go, for if they return, they were always yours.
And if they don’t, they never were.”
Believing the truth behind his words,
I proceeded to clearing our messages
And deleting your number off my phone
Until next time..
If there is one..
Only time will tell..
Mar 29, 2015
Mar 29, 2015 at 2:43 AM UTC
A fashion designer has defended models who were labelled as "gaunt and unwell" on Facebook.
Andrea Moore's I AM range is sold at Farmers, and an image from its current campaign was posted on that company's Facebook page on Friday.
The picture features Chiara and Norina Gasteiger, who are twins represented by Clyne Model Management. Farmers customers did not react well to the now-deleted post.
"They so look gaunt and unwell. I'm really disappointed," Newshub says Anna Webster commented.
"You cannot look at these girls with their bones sticking out and believe that they are a good role model for a family store," Jo Austwick wrote.
"I have enough trouble with body image arguments with my daughters without these images being depicted. They do not look healthy."
Moore said the imagery had never been intended to cause offence, and that she felt for the Gasteiger twins, who have worked with the brand for three years.
"The twins are actually healthy, fun models who are busy university students... We love working with them because of their sense of self-worth and uniqueness as twins," she said.
"We have been in touch with the models and they were most upset by the whole thing. Fortunately, they have received a lot of support from their peers.
"The campaign was about preppy grunge, print with an edge. [It was not] about promoting unhealthy body types [or] anything else," Moore added.
Farmers posted the following statement on Facebook after deleting the I AM image:
"Dear valued Farmers customers! We appreciate you taking the time to send us your comments and concerns on a recent post for I AM. Please know it is not taken lightly and we in no way mean to promote an image for women in NZ to follow that could be regarded as unhealthy.
"We understand that no two bodies are the same and we always seek to show a range of body types throughout all our advertising. These images were supplied by the brand Andrea Moore as part of a wider campaign and were published by us. We will endeavour going forward to work closely with all our partners to ensure an appropriate image is portrayed.
"Thank you once again for your valued feedback."
Clyne Model Management have been approached for comment.Read more at:http://www.marieaustralia.com/cocktail-dresses | www.marieaustralia.com/one-shoulder-formal-dresses
Sep 5, 2016
Sep 5, 2016 at 10:30 PM UTC
saw something i can't erase from my memory
yet it's physically deleted from yours.
now there is no proof of your infidelity
besides my word.
you make excuses and tell me to keep quiet
not to start something over nothing.
what is nothing to you
is a lot of something to me.
you care more about the feelings of another
than you do about mine.
you lie to others about our relationship
you act as if you don't love me
as if you will leave me
but the second i say i will leave you
you are crying, with more excuses.
this is an all too familiar road for me
and i refuse to go down it again.
so many tears and excuses now
i could drown in them.
you still fight to keep toxic things
in your life.
you still fight to keep me content
by your side.
what your reasons are
i will never understand.
you never really loved me
you don't know what love is.
i will find a way to expose you both.
the last laugh will be mine.
Nov 21, 2015
Nov 21, 2015 at 12:26 PM UTC
I stopped calling
stopped texting
unfriended you on Facebook (LOL-not even my account....I don't have one) today
We've been friends for more than half my life
more than friends from time to time (FWB....BFF....NSA.....OMFG!)
and now it's like neither of us exists
Because you had to lie
you had to hold out....lead me on
to cover your *** for doing something I repeatedly told you to do ***
So painfully slowly I'm erasing you
deleting you
turning my mind off you (IMY :-( XO)
TTFN
Nov 8, 2013
Nov 8, 2013 at 8:15 PM UTC
I'm tired of deleting my sadness.
Beautiful prose is my pride, but pride can be broken
just like a heart weary with the world, and soft spoken
words can cut me like any other. I bleed. I need
love and laughter and starlight and music in my life.
We all need poetry and dancing in the kitchen and flowers.
Yet... The power of my words isn't a sacrifice,
and this language is not an altar to your smile.
I haven't bared my soul in quite a while, and for you to tell me not to...
Bite me. **** your needs and **** you.
I'm tired. I'm weary. My normal flights
of fancy and music and puns and laughter
are taking a reprieve. Skip over it if need be.
These words are mine to seek for shelter
and this page is mine on which to bleed.
Sometimes my playlist is full of spite
and tonight cliches
Are just what recovery looks like.
I recycled rhymes, penned cliches,
and god help me today I don't care.
Here's the exhibit. My wrists on a canvas.
Feel free to snicker.
Feel free to stare.
Dec 5, 2015
Dec 5, 2015 at 12:58 AM UTC
Penny got married young, she idolised her new man
Penny turned 16, said, I do I do, priest wed them both
Penny was happy, never complained to anyone, too shy for that
She crashed a party once, and met a gal named Sally
They became friends
And she confided in her
Shared little secrets, lips sealed, shook their little pinkies, never to tell
Then hubby walked in with curious smile, said you going to stay awhile
I'm not coming back until sunlight, best thing Penny had heard all night
‘Cause her new beau, wasn’t all that he seemed
But only Penny knows so go go go oh no go
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle-up
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle up
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup
Penny started staying inside, never going past the front gate
Some friends called saying you ok you ok you ok girlfriend
Penny searched websites, looking for a way out, deleting history, nobody got suspicious
While trying to play the good wife, reality started to sink in
Then she thought
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle up
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle up
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup
And I don't want anyone knowing about the abuse, just in case
I've covered up since day one, swollen face
A nightmare, ever since our honeymoon
Childhood dreams were locked in a cell, but kept them alive and still didn’t tell, even while being slammed unconscious
It's like my security blanket, it's the reason that I'm alive
Everyone has childhood dreams, but most will never survive
They don’t always come true, maybe one out of five, be wise
Believing Hollywood tabloids, that they are still very much together, all lies
So go about your ways, put up with the one, that doesn’t love you anymore and continually hurts us and says sorry, again
Always just after they have, again bruised us
Forgetting about the pain and coverups that were made
Thinking it was just a sleeping nightmare, oh no
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle up
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup
Go now, Go now
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle up
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup
Go now, Go now
Jan 14, 2020
Jan 14, 2020 at 1:58 AM UTC
building purist æsthetic
proselytizing solar-powered heliolatry
commemorating historic concert
sensing dark forces
fokken lekker antwoord
pumping sensory overload
featuring high-tech dee-jay
admiring gelato micro-truck
laxing laying lazing
"doing something nasty"
continuing quality content
entering another cathedral
journeying without borders
"exactly one year
since visiting vatican"
appreciating full-time gigasphere
awaiting pyongyang performance
depicting unlikely crowdsurfer
foreseeing exponential improvements
furthering esoteric agenda
sensing profound incompatibility
data-mining people's infidelities
anticipating futuristic caffeine
perfecting invisible propaganda
researching mind-control techniques
polishing psycho-social weaponry
sensing social embargo
flourishing frantic fanfare
admiring longitudinal monument
parodying marketing slogans
cycling through österreich
eyeing dystopian disneyland
streaming crosswords extended-play
herding glass kittens
deleting idiosyncratic fragment
loremipsum-ing laconic loudmouth
receiving ultramodern telegram
eigo-ga wakarimasu ka?
guzzling duck-fat fries
encouraging panic selling
(juxtaposing past incarnations)
getting black-and-white privilege
renewing boutique account
relishing cinema poutine
re-entering hibernation mode
opening old windows
continuing zoo motif
absquatulating excessive excesses
nullifying originality claims
proliferating protean persona
disappearing sidewalk alphabet
shrugging opprobrious moments
enjoying vertical alignment
re-entering cyberpunk paradise
approaching island sun
soaring beyond monoliths
trivializing extraneous argy-bargy
decreasing character limits
dumping generic accounts
uglifying commit message
escaping into idiosyncracy
moonshining great lake
exuding idiosyncratic propaganda
living nineties' dreams
making occidental cuisine
envisioning idiocratic president
expropriating your time
ascending homely helix
singing fat lady
Sep 12, 2015
Sep 12, 2015 at 12:12 PM UTC
my sadness is asking to use the bathroom during class just so I can lock myself up in one of the stalls and break down completely without worrying about people watching me. my sadness is trying trying trying to write but my hands are shaking too much to do anything but bury my head in them. my sadness is typing up messages to friends about what a ****** day it's been, but deleting the whole thing just as I'm about to send it, because no one deserves to be burdened by my problems— this is my struggle and mine alone; and I need to be able to deal with it. my sadness is not being in control of my own thoughts; not knowing how make the screaming voices stop. my sadness is absorbing the pain from people around me and sometimes letting it get to me.
--
my sadness isn't rainy days and a few "sad songs". my sadness isn't "she drank the whole bottle but your name still burns at the back of her throat". my sadness isn't me spending time in children's playgrounds, surrounded by people with thoughts darker than mine ever could be, and a taste for drugs and danger. my sadness isn't "she smokes now, but her mind is still as hazy as the day you left". my sadness isn't flowers in my hair or anything that can be encapsulated in a tumblr photo or quote. my sadness isn't beautiful, nor poetic.
--
it's just sad.
Nov 7, 2015
Nov 7, 2015 at 8:44 AM UTC
lamenting out loud
incoming funk lords
remembering ambient illhueminati
using wrong account
applying lexical snobbery
"using arcane diction
during bamboo surplus"
sinning and redeeming
enjoying manufactured existence
struggling but whatever
transfigurating xenocryptic renderings
scheming paroxystic shipwrecks
dispensing xylophonic wainscotting
revolving number plates
disheartening star charts
upgrading defenestrated system
observing new alphabet
amplifying celestial explosions
trippifying schema migrations
deregulating various economies
befriending code snippets
writing excess minutiae
effulging caffeine consumption
rebuilding grandiose protectorate
uniting our caliphates
collecting projected change
kettling ostalgie hues
collapsing second-world references
traumatizing unrequited follow
making baseball analogies
surveiling little sheep
awaiting various answers
deleting defaced tweet
exciting times ahead
downloading panda consciousness
capitulating rising stellation
Sep 12, 2015
Sep 12, 2015 at 12:05 PM UTC
every heart stops beating
not every man's worth meeting
I can see by the cheesy greeting
this conversation's not worth completing
we could be great, but it would be fleeting
in the end, you'll end up cheating
and it'll be this number you're handing me, that I'll be deleting
Apr 16, 2020
Apr 16, 2020 at 2:09 AM UTC
Her kind of lonely wasn't the kind you just feel
It was the kind of lonely she went searching to resolve
It wasn't out of the ordinary to find her roaming around
looking for traces of him in the dust on the china cabinet
or in inanimate objects around the house
it wouldn't be peculiar to hear the lull of his favorite love songs playing through the thin walls of her one room apartment.
or to see her wipe away a tear as she opened the door
and invited you inside
It wasn't a rare sight to see her folding up the clothes he had left behind
Or typing paragraphs upon paragraphs of things she wished she would've said
Unfolding his clothes
bunching them up
throwing them in the corner
I can still see her hiding that stuffed animal he won for her at the fair
stuffing it in her closet
burying it under a pile of clothes and her own broken promises
entombing it deep enough to forget
Similarly, I still see her hiding the guilt she had found
I see her shoving it under her pillow
burying it under stardust and her own nightmares
keeping it close enough to remember
It wouldn't be bizarre if you caught her refolding his clothes
just 'one more time'
Putting them back in their drawers
Texting him
deleting the text before it sent
debating throwing out his old toothbrush
I remember quite clearly a time when she drank twenty bottles of water
all in succession
just to feel full again
I remember her holding her breath
until she'd turn blue
claiming she missed the way he took her breath away
Her kind of lonely wasn't the kind you just feel
it was the kind of lonely that drove her to insanity.
Nov 14, 2015
Nov 14, 2015 at 10:46 PM UTC
Her long black curled hair
Shoulder blades and collar bones
Naked under a strategically placed towel
Candles and stripper heels.
Seductive poses, he’s thinking about ******* her. Wanting her. He yearns for more. Wondering how this small frame feels.
My heart sank, dread filled my body
I expected to see fields and melting snow in that camera. Blinded while deleting all photo’s of you and I.
I didn’t deserve this, now I’m left with insecurities, anger and grief.
While you are just left with your lies and “erotica”
Mar 26, 2019
Mar 26, 2019 at 1:24 AM UTC
forging sagacious epoch
activating neural station
escaping hokey-pokey jiggery-pokery
transcribing ineffective fragments
digesting bear news
opposing usual exhaustion
deferring oxter reference
cascading style sheets
containing double readings
mumbling lorem ipsum
locating moose jaw
enforcing meticulous patterns
deconstructing vertical centering
manifesting additional destinies
deleting !important statement
craving sleep paralysis
receiving cryptozoological vibrations
lightning fast collapse
distracting tunnel vision
culling deadbeat sequentialists
overanalyzing twitter analytics
acquiring arbitrary relevance
spinning ping-pong sign
floccinaucinihilipilificating
floccinaucinihilipilificated
floccinaucinihilipilification
interjecting ****** holophrase
minifying conventional language
securing downpour refuge
admiring octopus chandelier
resuming party music
taking mental trip
encountering ersatz telesthesia
denigrating bygone grudges
maintaining elevated composure
ignoring neurotypical haters
eliciting cryptic emotions
foreshadowing triple crown?
experimenting acrostic restriction
noticing ubiquitous "threes"
aggrandizing loyal legion
favoring ursine narratives
finding oblique resilience
yielding orchestral undulations
Sep 5, 2015
Sep 5, 2015 at 12:51 PM UTC
.
A friend of mine just questioned
what inspires me to write
They know I'm writing poems
every morning, noon and night
I answered with a chuckle
saying, *“I don’t have a clue
In fact right at this moment
I’m not sure what I will do
I looked outside my window
it’s the same as yesterday
Traffic lights and restaurants
and people on their way
I listened to some music
but I’ve heard that song before
And I don’t really like it
it’s a tough one to endure
I took a walk through nature
past the flowers and the trees
But allergies are killing me
all I could do was sneeze
I typed some words in sequence
to see if they would rhyme
And ended up deleting them
a total waste of time”*
Then I saw their smile
I thought, now there’s a thing
I like when people smile
and the happiness they bring
There’s joy in that expression
like spring will soon arrive
It lifts another’s spirits
and makes them feel alive
Thoughts of sunny mornings
begin to float around
Maple leaves and meadowlarks
and dew drops on the ground
That very special person
who lives inside your heart
And just how much you love them
even when you are apart
I started feeling better
as my face now wore a grin
And when I looked up at the screen
I saw one once again
For now I knew the answer
and I told them oh so true
*“It seems today my inspiration
came from seeing you”*
Aug 25, 2016
Aug 25, 2016 at 7:10 PM UTC
you told me it was over
i hear it loud and clear
but deleting our messages
broke my heart
taking down our pictures on my wall
hurt like hell
and giving back your stuff
was unimaginably painful
until i had no trace left of you but the memories
then i knew, it was over
Feb 23, 2021
Feb 23, 2021 at 8:52 PM UTC
*"Our song came on the radio yesterday and for the first time, I didn't roll down my windows or turn it all the way up or sing along. I forced myself to turn it off."
"I washed your sweatshirt after sleeping in it for so many nights so it wouldn't smell like you anymore and I boxed it up to put in the top of my closet, out of sight."
"Remember when we went to the beach and kept snapping photos? I finally burned them yesterday. I watched as the flames burned out, just like we did."
"Our anniversary passed, and I didn't feel empty like I did the month before. It only took me four months."
"I'm deleting your contact out of my phone so I won't feel tempted to text you when I lie awake at night thinking about what we used to be. I guess I'll be doing you a favor, seeing as you don't care about the past us like I do."
"I hope you're happy with her, because after all this time I'm finally happier without you."*
Mar 29, 2015
Mar 29, 2015 at 10:18 PM UTC
erasing you hasn't been simple
i never will completely
deleting pictures and messages
sorting it all out so neatly
you know i love the rain
listening to it pour
i wish you the very best
but i won't be here anymore
i know you're hurting too
we're stuck feeling so blue
i know you're hurting too
it's what's best for me and you
it's painful for us both
don't let me keep coming back
how can you still love me
there's so much that we lack
you loved when i sang
i'm stuck now singing about you
i hate that it's come to this
it's true
i know you're hurting too
it's hard to go through
i know you're hurting too
it's what's best for me and you
Aug 17, 2021
Aug 17, 2021 at 9:11 PM UTC
I wish I could go back to a year ago
When I thought I was at my lowest low
When I thought everything had gone so wrong
Bet I would be singing a different song
I'd start by deleting that very first line
Maybe then my life would be just fine
I would never have learned how to twist that bowl
Maybe then I wouldn't be filled with this gaping hole
I wouldn't know that you could eat dope
Maybe then I wouldn't be left without hope
I would have said no and walked away
Maybe then I wouldn't be sitting here a **** addict today
May 26, 2013
May 26, 2013 at 12:28 AM UTC
got poetry to show to my friends but im thinking of deleting my twitter
my thoughts aren't as cool as I wish they could be, so bookmark my HP page for the updates
the summer is chillin and im going places my mom doesn't want me to go to
just because a place brings back bad memories doesn't mean I shouldn't be there
Im past all of the stupidness and accepted my foolishness, no need for the reminders my ego is drowning
my link on my insta no need for tweeting my emotions my tumblr is boring but so are your hobbies
im writing for some dollars for more pencils, im running out of them
i got some money but thats for anything that comes coincidently coincidence
no need for some pens because I cant erase mistakes with them
nhom site under construction so give us a few weekends our weeks are productive we hustle until we get it **** what you're doing
there isn't any way but the need way so excuse your missing bikes, we're 16 and we're foolin
we order pizza and write down ideas no time for galleria
we ride for adventure on two weels
interacting for promo no need for hiding behind some screens
my life is a run on but thats how it should be no time for breaks, sleep is an option lead is necessary
rooftops capture sentences paintings illustrate our visions
if you dont contact me then why should I
I should be humble but my account has 4 zeros, my mom dont trust me with it so I dont know the pasword
That child support is piling up, I dont really care
got miles on miles on miles on miles on miles ridden on my bike but I haven't gone anywhere but the city
Im aiming for the carpet so when we go back to school I'm bringing my summer
Got numbers as options but there's no reason to hit them up, got a good one I'm grateful
I'm riding fast my way don't slow me down, is this a comeup? I don't know I'm just going along
Come up from suburbs, I want to live high until my view is the moutains
Im from Dallas but that don't mean nothing, no city defining where I'm going because I was on the 26th floor when I was at my lowest and I wasn't even on coke
these days my grind is so lowkey, im sleep deprived
my paint never dries, my brushes are always getting washed but these projects aren't for the public
I only have a few questions, is love really real? should I sleep more?
i dont know but Monarch dr is gonna be in a book one day
Jul 5, 2014
Jul 5, 2014 at 4:43 PM UTC
Do ever feel like running away?
Disappearing into the night
changing your phone number
deleting your facebook
twitter, instagram, pintrest, tumblr
leaving no trace of where your going
Do you ever want to start a new life?
moving to a new city
and starting over
where no one knows you
Maybe one day I'll do just that....
Oct 27, 2013
Oct 27, 2013 at 7:19 PM UTC
Writing of a poem
Oh! How it can be likened
To having a baby!
With the copulation of fancy and thought,
Comes the moment of conception
It can happen any day
Unanticipated or planned erstwhile
On a star studded night
Or a rain drenched morn
It swims into you as a seed
So tiny… so inconspicuous
Once the pregnancy confirmed
Comes irritation, nausea
Lethargy and loss of appetite
Your stomach rarely growls for food
Clouds of words hang heavy and low,
Refusing to break into showers
They don’t gush or rush.
Ideas dry up leaving the nib parched
Lines crack n’ break
Depression follows
Discouraged, you feel fatigued
But all the while you begin to realize
That a new life
Independent of you
Has begun growing inside you
Then all the care taken
To foster the young life
You read…
You refer the lexicon
You withdraw from other works
Take rest, relax in solitude
Slowly the foetus moves
The first stirring of life!
With fond fingers, as you pat your belly
Your pen pats the paper
The first line…..
The first faint beating of the heart!
Then words….
Like little harness bells tingling
Fall in line, line after line!
Drawing nourishment from you,
The embryo grows limb by limb
The miniscule of insight
Grown after months of waiting
Into a mature body of illumination!
A stretch of your dreams!
A suffusion of light!
After the labor pains
Of scribbling and scrawling,
Writing and rewriting,
Deleting, adding and editing,
With time stretching and contracting,
A baby, no, a poem is born.
Whether cute or ugly
No mother can dislike it
She marvels at its birth
Wraps it in her warmth
She must have had in mind a name
Or seeks to find a name;
An apt name
Thus a poem with a title is born!
She wonders if her baby would lit a smile,
On others lips too
Or from them would flow,
Words of endearment as from a trickle!
Jul 31, 2016
Jul 31, 2016 at 11:39 AM UTC
It’s traumatic not knowing what to type
It’s that edgy feeling till your thoughts ripe
Its difficult to sleep in peace
I place a variety of words on a leash
I sit with a cup of coffee
With my laptop glaring at me
My mind is weakened
My soul is vacant
My cursor is blinking impatiently
And I am deleting each line repeatedly
My hearts not burning with sorrow
My heart is happy but hollow
I don’t feel anything extreme
I don’t feel generous or mean
My mind is at peace
My thoughts are at ease
And until an artist can’t feel
Their thoughts are concealed
So I need to dig in deep
And let this moderate feeling seep.
-Zainab Attari
Apr 20, 2014
Apr 20, 2014 at 2:14 PM UTC
Heavy sleep. Alarm clock blaring. The bus I missed. The way you
looked at me when I sat down. How you liked the shirt I was wearing.
My awkward compliment on your outfit. Your number in my phone.
Paying for the first date with you. For the third. The incredible ***
Paying for the twentieth date. Months passing. Two Anniversaries and
one ring. The apartment we bought. The bed we shared. The things we
said. The moments we had together. Overwhelmed by my feelings for
you. Wrestling in the kitchen. Quiet nights at home. Pet names. A
sense of comfort. The time that went by. The stress from your job. My
overtime at work. Not tonight dear, I have a headache. Arguing over
directions. Nothing to worry about, just a rough patch. Silence at
dinner. The big fight. The divorce papers. Your confession that you
never loved me. The hole where my heart used to be. All the alcohol I
drank. All the women I ****** Convincing myself that I’m past you.
Time at the gym. Wave to the cute girl at the bar. Get a haircut. Start a
diet. Smile at strangers. Buy a new car. Just fine, never better. See you
with him at the grocery store. My silent indignation. His hand with
yours. The tears on the way home. Grinding my teeth. I'm too good for
you anyway. The beer I consumed. The tree I drove into. The meetings
I went to. The way I hated myself. The way I hated you. The way I still
loved you. The way I knew I always would. The way I hated realizing
that. The depression. The ************ Still sleeping on the right side
of the bed. The volunteer hours I completed. The charity worker I met.
The mediocre *** The way she said she understood me. My guard
coming down. Forgetting the way you looked. Deleting the messages I
saved. Sighing. My second marriage. The kids she had with me. The
years that melted together. Hearing you moved a while back from an
old neighbor. Long walks by myself. Everyday seeming the same.
Never feeling right. All the years I woke up
cold,
alone,
still wishing you were next to me.
Feb 7, 2010
Feb 7, 2010 at 8:34 AM UTC