When I first saw her, she was like an enemy infront of my eyes,
As I kept growing in her presence and understanding her,she became my obsession,
For I grew old in love and young in hatred,
For she became my source of life,
Like the freshness of the ocean she purely remained in my thoughts,
For I without her I am purely dehydrated,
For at night she becomes my own vission and at daylight she becomes my ambition,
For she became my need of life and love,
For she is truely my determination of love..

sitting across from you in this quiet library
while we do homework,
i look at you and wonder-
how did i get so lucky to be loved by you?
6 months ago you asked me out.
6 months of pure happiness and love,
6 months of never once questioning if you do love me,
only knowing that you do.
and now, we look forward to the rest of our lives,
together.
loving someone has never been easier,
it's like second nature,
as simple and innate as breathing.
your fluffy brown curls,
stunning hazel eyes,
and adorable silver and navy glasses;
unparalleled intelligence,
kindness, goofiness, dorkiness,
lovability- my golden retriever boy.
you always take care of me,
especially when my adhd and anxiety get bad,
and i always take care of you,
especially when you're tired and dehydrated.
i love you

He couldn't stay for tea
He was afraid he might feel something
Upstairs instead of in his
*****
If he had been thirsty
I would have shown him a metaphor
For dehydrated relationships
Gallium spoons dissolving in any hot liquid
Solubility tends to complicate things
We lose pieces of ourselves
At body temperature
Boil down impurities
A reduction of our leftover parts
Our leftover lust

i miss you
steady guitar riff in a loop
tucked behind my ear
you trace your fingers there
i fall asleep with a smile

Water is a transparent fluid from which the world streams, lakes, oceans, and rain and is the major constituent of the fluids of living things
Water gives our lungs the moisture we need to breathe.
Water, therefore, is breath to life.
You cannot have too much of it.
Drinking too much water too quickly can lead to water intoxication water intoxication occurs when water dilutes the sodium level in the bloodstream and causes and an imbalance of water in the brain.
Although, you need it to survive.
People can survive no longer than 8 to 10 days without water
When our cells are starved for water, they become parched, dry and more vulnerable to attack by viruses.
Water is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills uncounted thousands of people every year.
Water constitutes, regulates, flows through, cleanses and helps nourish every single part of your body. But the wrong kind of water -- with inorganic minerals, chemicals and other contaminants -- can pollute, clog up and turn to stone in every part of your body.
3.4 million people die each year from water related disease
That is equivalent to almost the entire city of Los Angeles.
I think water is all around us in metaphoric ways
For instance, water damage to a cell phone, computer, a book, or an entire city.
Water creeps into places where it is not supposed to be, where it is not meant to be and destroys things.
Suddenly, your screen goes white, words are smudged, people's belongings and treasures are ruined.
Water breaks things.
Water is a lot like pain.
It creeps into our life like a serpent in tall grass and fractures things that were once in perfect condition.
But the miraculous thing about it, although it is a demon, we need it to live.
Without pain we would not know pure joy.
How can you appreciate stepping to the sunlight if you have never experienced the shade.
Water is a lot like people.
70% is a person is water.
31% of our bones are made up of water.
Only 1% of the world's water is drinkable.
Some contain toxins that can be fatal to the human body.
Not every person may be able to quench your thirst.
When they leave they many leave you dehydrated and dizzy.
Not every person is drinkable.
Some people carry demons that they will introduce you to and you cannot rip them off.
These demons are not in relativity to the band-aids in your childhood.
People can cause damage like no other.
Some say that loneliness is killer.
Isn’t funny to think that the one thing you need most can leave you with more scars than you had in the first place.
Water is a lot like love.
Something we crave when the exhaustion from all of our day's work gets too heavy.
Without love we feel empty
When the body gets dehydrated it has already lost over 1% of its water
When we thirst for attention it's as if we lose an inch of security
Love is unlocking the door and flooding
Love causes destruction
But love is at the absolute brink of all things desired
Love is different temperatures
Love can boil, love can freeze, love can be just right
Love can be the one thing at the end of the day that refreshes the mind
Water is used frequently by firefighters to extinguish fires helicopters sometimes drop large amounts of water on wildfires or bushfires to stop the fire from spreading and limit the damage that it can cause
Love is the antidote to pain and the virus itself
Love is limiting damage
Love can calm the wildest fire set in someone's soul using only words
Water is such a generic liquid
Water is the only thing that hold each of us together
So when you reach the end of your journey
Remember water and all of its different forms
Remember the invigorating taste
Remember the abuse
Remember the revival
Remember it all
Because it is all there
**We simply do not look close enough

addicted
turning on you
you’re more toxic
than ******
scroll fluid
in my veins
you're dangerous
a sweet poison
harmful to my health
I fill myself with you
of your essence
every fiber of me
wants to feel you
your voice
your words
your smell
your hands
your mouth
light me up
and raise me
to dizzying heights
and they throw with me
in adrenalin
descents
that leave me breathless
you’re never enough
darkness takes you away
and I’m  in withdrawal symptoms
you’re  hot oil
in my veins
burn
my nervous system
my heart
is covered with pus
a thin and  unquenchable
itchy
crawls under my skin
my brain cells
seeking frantic
satisfaction
in wrinkles of memory
dig every corner
crave a drop of you
forgotten on  the bottom
of an empty bottle
you’re toxic
abstinence
doesn’t give me  peace
I’m alienated in a whirl
of strobe lights
sweat
dehydrated
confused
find me
take me
save me

I’ve walked on the tiles made for kings
many times I’ve been in the house of luxury
but it has never belonged to me
I am but a visitor in the palace of Eden
I could describe the opulence but I cannot tell you how it feels
to posses, to own, to carry your weight lightly in such states
I am not a beholder and I’ve never felt myself worthy of such affluent
and often unnecessary necessities
working class woman on the weekends
to clean the savvy bungalows of the ludicrous and almost laughable
wealth of Beverly Hills
it felt almost like trespassing, like jumping over train tracks
As soon as you see sight of headlights getting closer and the
earth beneath you tumble, shaking it’s veins
I would wear a uniform, a knight’s armor of invisibility
upon arrival, there was that shift in the air
That momentary feeling that you’re not in Kansas anymore
There are more trees here, the bugs even seem more alive than they did
down there below the hills
the pedestal of the hungry, greed sitting humbly on its’ throne
smoking expensive colored cigarettes
rings blowing in your face of cool breeze
Although every residence was architecturally different
it was always the same, the same austere patterns
the redundant originality, the commonplace pretension
The gates always had codes but the entrance was always open
Whenever you stepped inside the first thing to notice
were the Rorschach walls, the mirror image of whoever resided there
the hollowness it evoked, the sterility of a life that although lived
wasn’t honest
dare I say unhappy
There were usually film posters signed by movie stars long ago dead
Art that said nothing, whose lips had been glued shut by clean dollar bills
the brash ****** it tried to display lacked controversy in dusty rooms
the irony being that it had become everything it tried to displease
and yet I was envious
the violent comfort it imposed was far more inviting than
living in rations, in the poverty that ate at your skin
it was friendliness with a clenched fist, like the hostess at a
party that smiles too wide and moves her eyes too quickly
sloshing her champagne glass but never quite spilling it
I remember once stumbling upon one the owners of a house
she was sitting in a wheelchair, there were diamonds on the wheels
I thought I was meeting god for the first time
she looked like she had lived ten lifetimes, wearing fox fur around her neck
the paws resting defiantly on shaky shoulders
age spots congregating around her eyes like whispering spies
wrinkles weaving and unraveling from her forehead to her chin
small nose inhaling sharp gulps of smoke, dust, reason
she wore a translucent egg-shell colored gown
that cascaded like a waterfall down to her tiny feet
it was as transparent as her skin making her look like a
one of those see-through fishes
all organs and blood, bone with the marrow withering
her eyes were closed but she spoke, piercing the room
“so you’re the new girl. We don’t take kindly to strangers
so she must’ve thought you were trustworthy, but I know
someone’s true intentions. I can smell it. It’s a gift.
It’s always the foreigners that wear masks. That’s how
they survive and who can blame them I would do the same.
I’ve been all over the world; the tips of my boots have been
polished while there are others that fester like rats in their
own caves. I know the contempt they must feel, I’ve never
been held down by others more powerful than me and yet
I know that it only creates misunderstanding.
I didn’t ask for this. I earned this. All of this.”
She pointed around the room.
“I am the only one that can decide my fate. When you
want something bad enough it is given to you. Most
just want things for free. They want it handed
to them in a silver plate with a golden spoon. ****
will always shy away from the light because there
is a sickness in their brains that don’t let them see past
their disgusting oppression.
I assume since you haven’t interrupted, I take
your silence as a sign that you don’t believe what I am saying.
That this piece of advice has flown over you.
I very well could have written these words on a letter
at the bottom of a stack of mail that will never be opened and
that’s okay. I don’t expect you to believe to my truth.
But the emperor you see before you was not conjured out of dust
and thin air, I swear it.” She ended with an angry laugh.
I wanted to say that her environment was polluted with
cotton ***** and the furniture was contaminated with soot
and dead skin cells
that once everyone dies they turn into dirt, into
the sand from which we seemed to have been composed of
but I realized that she didn’t see herself as dying
Seeing her there in the dark room with the shades drawn
I realized if that’s what it took to become a god
I didn’t want to be any more than human
but all I said was
“ma’am your plants are in need of watering.”

the glitterball in space
wrapped in wormholes
caressed by distant quasars
peak at optimum speed
before floating falling
toward the muted aromas
of space age earth

the bile of industry
smears the planet in neon
one giant shinning marble
city lights stretch
in the haze from pole to pole
whatever hemisphere
whatever timezone
whatever continent

aqua is the precious mineral
few places exist where
hope springs life eternal
rivers were rerouted years ago
run by power corporations
who package it in sachets
with dehydrated memory

a planet of consumption
tectonic plates stitched
stapled, bridged and woven
the fabric of the world

we unzip to consume
revel in the electronic tune
that breeds our contempt
for the the lost seasons
our reason dilluted, polluted
by the tune that remains the same;
beautiful stranger
dream a dream for me
because now all we have
between us
is acid rain.

Demon from Depressed Depths
Horror lurking in the murk, squirting myself through liquid nightmares, paranormal animal portrait
The walls of my bedroom are black, the ceiling navy, ****** sun above me winks in mockery
My friends are few in this frozen almost-society; I wander the briny fog in boredom, purposeless
Eyes swollen from swimming, swallowing so much salt: dehydrated underwater, skin pasty and ill
I hide from starving sharks and their terrible tiny teeth, but duel the diving whale: he I can drown
I can ***** forth literature; the pens of Whitman and Carroll were filled from my blackened innards
From fingertip to toetip I am nearly biggest, in a world without fingers or toes, primitive appendages
I am all knowing: I commune with the dead: I can operate a Ouija board alone with all these arms
I was killed off by Tennyson after just 14 lines, but Lovecraft made me what I am: heathen deity
Wonderful creature, yet I find myself here: battered next to chips in a polystyrene tray: Beach food

Take nothing for granted, little kids,
It was library day for our kids,
Lateral epic lit. for the kids,
(The kids' librarian was off her ****),
Reading new wave kids' lit.,
Such as "Paddington was ******",
Then there was a new book for tots,
Titled "RIP Spot",
And an epic for libraries to fill,
Called, "Bye, Bye, Blinky Bill."....

Now it's story time for tots,
Here's our new one, "RIP Spot',
(Lift the *****, there's the chaps),
RIP Spot, the street dog,
We dehydrated Spot,
(Life the *****, there's the chaps),
Froth, Spot, Froth,
Yes, read along, tots,

Read along, little tots,
We all starved Spot,
He was a street dog,
(Lift the *****, there's good chaps),
Rot, Spot, Rot,
Now we can count his ribs, dear little kids,
(Lift the *****, there's the chaps),
Happy maggots, Spot,
Spot is mort, poor Spot,
He was a street dog,
(Lift the *****, there's the chaps),
Mort, Spot, Mort,
Now Spot's on his way to Heaven,
His ribs were more than seven,
(Lift the *****, there's the chaps),
Have some flies, Spot,
Rot, Spot, rot,
They opened up the Pearly Gates,
Poor Spot wasn't too late,
(Lift the *****, there's the chaps),
Look at Spot's halo,
There's two more books to go,
Spot has sent us a card down here,
"F.U., Society, you didn't care,"
(Lift the *****, there's the chaps),
Rot, Spot, Rot,
You were a street dog,

Ooh, are you all sad?
Two more books in this bag,
Here's "Paddington was ******",
(The kids' librarian is off her ****),
We'll all read along  now, kids,
Paddington was ******,
The tots were, by now, totally miffed,
He was their childhood hero,
Now a drunken old dero,
Rolling around in the gutter,
An alcoholic ******,
Society didn't care,
He was only a homeless bear,
Now the tots are totally miffed,
Paddington was ******....

Now, here's our last epic book,
This one's worth a look,
"Bye, Bye, Blinky Bill,
His mother forgot the pill,
Perched on a tree up the hill,
Blinky Bill ran under a bus,
****** on Eucalyptus,
His mother forgot the pill,
So, Bye, Bye, Blinky Bill.

We took nothing for granted, let's say,
Kids' librarian got the sack that day!

white wisps
of bird
linger leisurely
before me,

until they're shot

by the fan
out the window.

there is no curtain rod
but a pillow case
thumbtacked
in place.

the window opens upwards,
held ajar by a jar
of dehydrated
algae.

we spin around the center
and the center spins back.

everything
revolving
round
everything.

another bird is born
and floats gingerly
around with
newborn
curiosity,
riding
the fan wind
round the world.

if an egg hatches
under a lampshade
a volcano is born.

Natures dilapidated rhythms
Carves itself into the trunks
Leaving only an omen
To be enchanted by a passer by

This fellow lone traveler
walking into ceilings of emerald delusions
The saintly stones and the creaks of trowlbrooks
He can not help but to gasp even to deafened ears

Lulled into complacency by decades of broken legends  
The anointed ones and their fractured promises  
Still somehow a harmony of one lonely leaf called out to him

Echoes from an apocalyptic cavernous wasteland
All the worlds suffering adjoined in one single note
With the agony and punishment
of all the dehydrated souls  

The traveler was resurrected by the choice to live in a world of sensation
Rather then some brick containment
He chose to let suffering be fall his confessions

With a symphony in one hand
And a chain saw in the other
He belted the incarnation of freedom

They all tumbled for the rocks
he , the saw and the beauty
The clashing cascade
A blessed rapture and necessary harmonic sacrifice
all to the gods of that ensure we never have silence

I look up to the sky and realise how large this universe is and how endless the possibilities are and how minuscule I am in comparison, and I am dehydrated. I am dehydrated with a thirst for life that no man could ever quench.

I've decided to end my life
he wrote in a note
and pinned it to
his laid off clothes.
It isn't as bad as it sounds.
He turned up three weeks later
in Singapore,
alive and well
if somewhat confused
and dehydrated.
As for where he had been
he wouldn't say
but to those who knew him
his smile
meant that something had changed.

Revelatory refractions held in the disco ball’s reflection, glancing off the wall.
Dim-lit dreams tilt forward, spilt into a paper cup, bounced backward and sprinkled up.

******* synonyms from the cold, dead pages of the riddle’s mask.
Breaching spatial avenues left for those who understood the task.
Taking hits from a dry-lit flask, leaving windows closed to bask

Clapped the snap back bass kit as it turned Wallace snitch.
The Wire drawn and laid on lawns boundless in the ditch.

Deaf to congruencies of affection, brought about by an adolescent *******.

Blind spot in the centre of view. Rhythmic dancing, oblivious to the pew
Unplugged mixing, interlocked twisting
Pulsing in tune with distorted computation
Dehydrated seizures next to the watering station

Molly Mary caught in the flashing lights, blinded by the car’s brights.
A necklace found, nothing else around.
Body grasped for fun, stuffed, mounted, late night pokes meticulously counted.

Thirst

Yes I know what it means to thirst I hiked across the mountains to a friend’s distant ranch one possible reason I didn’t just go down the road was when returning by jeep from the same ranch I ran into literally thousands of these little guys they were following a mating call I guess to the ladies they really looked fine but for me it was a little hair raising no pun intended as they say since they were hairy themselves if little fuzzy caterpillars come to mind I only wished that was the case I was going about thirty and they were crunching and flying up behind the jeep as I drove through their intended love fest. I suppose if the jeep had shuttered or died as the one did in the San Antonio River as the driver crossed the slab in the river while the water was rising and drowned out the carburetor and was carried so ignominiously down river. I don’t know maybe a thousand Tarantulas could carry a guy off that was why I was going across the mountain and they had the road to themselves.

First I miss calculated I thought after going past the San Antonio mission across the San Antonio river up the mountain that I would find water at the building that stood on the top nothing but an old abandoned corrugated shed. I had no intention of going back the hour or more getting to the top then the five or so miles and mountains aren’t smooth clear across up and down in the baking sun in that arid semi desert country when I finally looked from the top of the mountain down on the long road that led back to the ranch I was hot and dehydrated maybe those tarantulas were over rated I don’t think so well any way look a pond right next to the lane looks can be deceiving I finally crashed and banged my way down to the pond oh great dog days of summer **** to bad move over **** I buried my face in it and drank **** and a whole bunch of moss that was right under the water and it was hot I wasn’t complaining.

By now you know my interest isn’t in natural thirst I seriously doubt that any one is thirsty naturally speaking but we all are in a dry and thirsty land without spiritual water. It shows by the unhappiness expressed by so many they don’t get it the soul is not craving water of this world it is seeking the one who met the woman at the well so many women deride the bible when it speaks about man being the head nowhere is there more consideration giving to women than in the pages of holy writ to this woman he came see the water glistening as it spills from the clay jar inviting yes but multiply it a thousand times when he said if you drink of that water you will thirst again the water I offer will satisfy your deepest longings it is the highway that ends in joy forever more would you be foolish and take trinkets from a stranger when you are with the very fount that all things proceed from and have their being I promise you a river of living water that will never cease a spring that has started its over flowing this very day in your presence waters that are pure and will quench all thirst drink with abandonment he stands before you his words haven’t chaged.

"i'm Rookie"

maybe i'll say it someday when I'm driving
naked skin burning on a sun kissed motorcycle seat
past old fruit stands,
toward some shadowed, dehydrated strangers arms,
in the texas heat.
i'll show them my homemade tattoos,
and recite some poetry to them.

i'll be wearing nothing but a feather headband,
and thigh high socks,
with a flask of throat burning
fire
trapped to the side of my leg.
i'll have nothing, and i'll need nothing,

but the open road,
and strangers hands caressing my candlelit skin,
when you can softly hear the rain at night,
like warm sweat of the
desert sky.

Seeing you for the first time -
you fill me with warmth and affection,
those I pushed away when all was surreal

Meeting you for the first time -
you have a magic wand
and scare away the dragon that instilled my fears

Hugging you for the first time -
you show me the pond
that could easily overflow with all my tears


Us becoming one undermines all our doubts


Your kiss is a drop of water
in my dehydrated mouth

Your hug is the warmth I need
in the icy months of despair

You were supposed to be here now
Our hands intertwined

If only
If only you had dared to love me

So maybe he touched my soul
And claimed it was old
Stole it
With honest intent
To never return it to my body

So maybe he touched my hips
And sank his teeth into my lips
Ripped them
With honest intent
To never hear me speak

So maybe he drank my tears
And extracted every fear
Before walking
With honest intent
To leave me dehydrated

"Every time I look into a mirror I see the eyes of the devil".
The perpetual flame of life
A new dawn, an enlightening dusk;
The translucent sun
The convection of eternity,
Abysmal adversary,
The convocation of co-eternal legions!
''Every time I cry I see the face of God".
Influencing twilights perfection,
Hells paradise devouring
The ardent fervour of the carmine flame
Piercing the atmosphere,
Constantly tantalising the air- fuelling.
The forests engulfed, bellowing from the apse shaped canopies
Violet blue threads of of ribbon;
Wofting unto nothingness
Vapourising smoke.
Natures delightful beauty, casting a shadow
The conflagration immanently consuming lands;
Raging across the earth
Dehydrated and scorched.
Baptismal tears vanquishing the fire,
Heavens standing ovation, applauding
A contained flame,
The sound of rain the fires lamentation.



1997 ELEETE J MUIR

Have  I ever told you- I still have your boutonniere?
Perched proudly upon my poetry books~
All of the memories of "Us" may have been stored-
hidden-
in a box solely for those memories
but that flower stands proudly,
untouched from the date- May 3rd

Fragile as it may be ( now dehydrated )
It remains a symbol of our love -
Filled with beauty, and fantasy-
but now dried out-
yet I still have it

Should I throw it away?
Forget and abandon it-
Or keep it as a memory?
and risk it growing on me
The longer it stays
the more questions arise...

Do you still have yours- Or is it gone forever?
*Do withered flowers lose their beauty?

I use to worry, sitting at home lying on the couch wondering just how long I could go before drifting off into some psychedelic slumber. Wondering how long it would take for you to find your way home from a bed two towns away. I use to think of all the ways I could maybe, for a while, get you to stay. That I could try and make you remember the cold January nights when sleet covered Philadelphia's streets and icicles hung from windows, yet we stayed outside, because for the oddest of reasons we were happy out there.

I use to stay up late, sitting on the kitchen floor against the fridge, staring up at the yellow fluorescent light above the sink watching fruit flies dance to some unknown rhythm. Shoulders drooping, arms laid haphazardly at my side like fresh snow shoveled from a driveway. I guess I found some comfort gathering from the tired warmth that blew from the fridge vent, some stale form of heat, that if I closed my eyes and dreamed seemed almost like passion. Almost like acceptance, almost peace, almost satisfaction, almost like you weren't gone.

I use to be so cautious. Cover my shoulders, keep to yourself, don't let them stare as you cross the street. Just come home, just come home where you belong, you were there. At least you use to be. Then sometime under the dehydrated September sky I settled at the front step. I let myself stay free for a few more moments, and it grew. Everyday I would stay outside the front door a little longer - as I began to not flinch at every creak coming down the street because I knew it couldn't have been you. You were in some other city, down on some other street, in another house, with some other fool that let you be their everything.

The simplest things are the first to change.

You eased out of my life like the slack of a power line, coasting away a little every day till I could only see you as a horizon, and then beyond. No sooner had every piece of you eased out of my house, life drifted back in. I sat on that couch and little by little every day, yellow dripped from the ceiling. The smell of lilac flowering from the walls, and for the first time in a while, an empty apartment felt filled. Occupied. Present.

In the Dead Sea I met you
sinking in the mud, I waded
between this pool of fish
I was ***** and unkind
quick sand, swift drought
laughing with a closed mouth
like noon spilling into a water cup
my eyes dried
whispering my secrets into a
country with no name
in the Dead Sea I met you
caught in a caravan
caught in your headlights
49 reasons to uncurl your fist
and lay something breathing there
like my thoughts dehydrated
but this is about you
in the Dead Sea I kissed you
lazy eyed, drooling over sunken ship
like sunken lovers, like
sunken friends
nothing grows
except the skin around the
exit wounds
around the tattered lungs
the ravaged cartilage
but you know that
but you know that
in the Dead Sea I loved you

my lips try to hold
the lingering taste

of your
love you, love you, farewell

cactus holding water
from a rainfall

that happens only once
each year

I am thinking Arizona

when you suggest
we start seeing other horizons

tumbleweeds where words should be

sandy tongue apologies

dehydrated and hallucinating

I mistook you for an oasis

You sit there
In the corner of my too neat room
Arms crossed behind your head

While I shoot daggers at you
The memories of what we used to be sear the inside of my eyeballs
And I remember how when we would touch nothing else mattered
When we were together we were unstoppable


And I wonder how you ended up in my bed room
After 8 months of having you out of my life you’ve somehow wormed your way back in
After 8 months of living oceans away from you you’ve somehow convinced me we should be friends
After 8 months of recovering from the tornado called you that wreaked havoc on my life you’re back
And you’re sitting there like you own the place
You’re sitting there and your confidence and sense of self fill the room
….it’s overbearing

You look up from your iphone
I’m practically huddled in the corner of my queen-sized bed afraid of what you may do and you ask
‘So there’s no chance of us having *** tonight?’

Really?
Wait, really?
That's all you have to say?
After the tears
After the fights
After everything
That’s what your interested in
I shake my head no
And I hope that will be enough to make you leave

This is my safe haven
This is my home
This is the place I don’t have to hide, usually
I hope you’ll go home
Just stand up and walk away
But no
Tonight you want to talk
You ask me why
WHY?
Are you serious?!
Did you seriously just ask that?
Here’s why
You drank me up like you were dehydrated and I was the only fresh spring in miles
I opened up to you
I gave you my soul
I shared with you my emotions (the bits and pieces I don’t generally give away)
And you drank them up
You gave me nothing in return
I was empty
All that was left was useless mud

The way I feel about you is not the way you feel about me
So why should I do this to myself
What’s between you and me, it isn’t healthy for me
So, no, we aren’t going to have ***
Finally you get up saying it’s time you should leave
I’m silently thanking God

And as I’m walking you out from the corner of the basement where my room is you grab me
We’re on the dark steps and you hug me
You hold me so close
And for every bit of that closeness that you're holding me next to your body I’m holding my happy dolphin pillow pet
And you hug me
And I touch its soft fur
And you breathe into me
And I remember just how blue my dolphin is in the light
And you’re breathing in my ear and I’m thinking BLUE BLUE BLUE
And you say in my ear that I was wrong
You feel the same way
When we’re together we can move mountains
We can do anything
And you whisper it
Even though no one’s around
And I’m focusing on my breathing and just how blue my blue dolphin is
And you kiss me
And you kiss me again
Then you kiss me once more and I…
I kiss you back

The air dries my scales, crisp shards flake from my fins
Like a dehydrated gift shop trinket
The same air keeps me alive
Circling a goldfish bowl, artificial blue
Like my seaworld but anything will do
I reach the bottom of the pool and touch the floor
But my chest panics for the oxygen above
If I breath in will it drown me?
Will the water pressure crush me?
Is the ocean really out to **** me?
Pacific, tropical, reef of aqua, the mermaid's domain
But I need the dry air and the ground under my feet
As much as the lure of the sea
Makes my tail swish expectantly