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Nemo W Dec 2016
Flashed across the dark veil of night
He lit up the sky like my God
but only for a brief second
then he was gone

I roared my thunder
and he responded in bright epiphany
how i wish he would stay to light up my sky
but he's too afraid to stick around and
be consumed by my roar

I'll wait for him in my storm
Response to Sean Scribbles' poem "She Is Thunder"
540 · Dec 2016
We are chemicals
Nemo W Dec 2016
Emotions are chemicals.

Are we drawn up simply by scientific means?
Do we actually control ourselves?
Can we have a say of what resolves in our own minds?

Dopamine,Oxytocin,Serotonin.
This is what determines your happiness and sadness.

Are we simply masses of cells that are just dying to live?
Do we really have a clue what living is?
We are cells, tissues, chemicals.

Is that it?
Can this be all?
Can fate be determined by your efficiency in creating
and releasing these chemicals?
501 · Dec 2016
Fake hugs
Nemo W Dec 2016
he penetrated my heart with his own will
and separated were we
reunited but it's changed
life stood still for me but his moved on
now i'm stuck with what's left
a broken heart and fake hugs..
Life ****** me over.
438 · Dec 2016
Words
Nemo W Dec 2016
i'm in love with your words
maybe its the way in which you write them
or how you share them
or when they fade how they are stuck in my mind
or how i wish they were mine
426 · Dec 2016
Bad News
Nemo W Dec 2016
Air is filled with the stale breath left by a minute passed.
Sobs caress the sound waves like soft feathers.
Writhing in the pain placed in your mind.
Ears feeling deceived hum with unrelenting white noise.
Visage blushed with confusion and depleting tolerance.
Tingling from head to toe, hurt stretching to every part of the body.
Thoughts roaming to dark places, a moment of insanity.
Wishing you were anywhere but here.
422 · Aug 2018
Making love
Nemo W Aug 2018
secretive and sweet
your eyes are pIeRcInG
slow movements
sensual looks
you know my all
and i know yours

unveiled and vulnerable
your smell is iNtOxIcAtInG
slow movements
sensual looks
you know my all

passionate and rough
your body is eNtWiNeD
quick movements
hungry looks
you know my all
and i know yours
Haven't written in a while but it's so addicting now.
394 · Dec 2016
My Love
Nemo W Dec 2016
Return to me  my love
I know I've done you wrong
but is there still a chance
to be with me at last
I wish you well if not
but return to me my love
334 · Dec 2016
Unkind Savior
Nemo W Dec 2016
can i be punished for this life
you gave it to me
unkind savior
i punish myself for what i have
strife with a knife
unkind savior
you punish me for what i've done
you take it from me
unkind savior
326 · Dec 2016
The Porch
Nemo W Dec 2016
There she is,
Sitting on the steps of the back porch.
It's the time of day when birds head home to nest,
the sun is dying down- a candle burnt to wick.
She's all alone, staring at the tree that rustles softly in the wind.
It would be quiet, except that the music in her headphones-
Blaring.
She's crying.
Droplets of feeling sliding down her face.
Her sobs make hardly a sound, yet her eyes are full of the deepest sadness.
Even on a beautiful night like this, she weeps.
It's been like this for years.
Crying, sobbing, weeping.
It's all the same.
The sadness surrounds her.

To her the world is a blur.
nothing has meaning, she tries everything.
Anything to feel something other than sadness.
The knife holds no threshold over the absolute sorrow,
yet she can find solace in it.
It won't be long until death takes her, or an even more forceful
human family pushes to help her.
She's dangling by a thread,
but human morality won't let her cut that last string.
324 · Dec 2016
Standing out
Nemo W Dec 2016
i'm standing out
and you not with me
but instead alone again
solitary forced to be
321 · Dec 2016
It's better that way
Nemo W Dec 2016
I need to give in
just sometimes
I've been told I hide things
but even now I can't let go.

I will disappoint you
so don't hold your hopes up high
I ignore what's real
just to cower.

I would let you in
If I trusted myself
but I don't
so think I'm unkind.

It's better that way
319 · Jun 2017
sadness
Nemo W Jun 2017
empty halls and
lifted feelings
drugs aren't enough
and always too little
and sadness creeps in
almost always too quick
before you know- you're on the ground
crying loud as hell but not a sound
What's the matter?
What's wrong?
songs from little birds
and you cry
and cry
and cry.
318 · Jun 2017
Anxiety
Nemo W Jun 2017
that feeling in your chest
in your legs, in your  neck.
the tingle in your toes
in your fingers, in your soul.
in and out, in and out
one, two , three
in and out, in and out
calm down
in and out, in and out
faster now
in and out, in and out
in and out, in and out
SCREAM
312 · Dec 2016
Curiosity Killed the Teen
Nemo W Dec 2016
So I'm hanging
Clutching onto the edge to save myself
A part of me wants to let go so I can experience the drop.
But others urge me to hold on.
My hands hurt..
A cramp in my baby finger,
A strain in my palms.
It's hard, I've never really been one to be physical.
But this takes all my strength.
At anytime my curiosity could make the best of me.
At anytime I could let go and be fine with it.
But others tell me not to, to just keep trying.
But it's hard.
299 · Dec 2016
Blessed reaper
Nemo W Dec 2016
Gnawing and crunching
The reaper scrapes out your insides.
Chatter in your brain, rattling
Clattering, battering
Reverberating your insides.
Heart jumps eyes falter.
Consuming the haze that surrounds you
The creature inside you never subsides
Writhing and heavy breathing
Horror and revenge mix in the mind
The noise is driving you insane
Shut up
The reaper laughs at your struggle
294 · Jun 2017
By What?
Nemo W Jun 2017
i was diagnosed-
a disease of the mind
a senseless surreal sensation
sent my way
by what?
GOD?
BIOLOGY?
FATE?
i sometimes bite my tongue
till it bleeds
the taste like copper in the sun
i sometimes curse my brain
for lying to me
it laughs
HAHAHA

i've been told so many
different theories-
so which do i believe?
i feel crazy
am i crazy
no i can't be
but i might be
HAHAHA

my perfect preacher
in a starched-white shirt
tells me it's GOD
i need to believe
follow his ways and you will succeed
my pill pushing psychiatrist
in his jet black suit and tie
tells me it's BIOLOGY
study and you will succeed
the free spirits
say it's fate
be loose and you will succeed
but which one is right?
i laugh at myself
HAHAHA

this is all too hard
i guess i'll give up
my twinkling tears
will never stop.
286 · Jun 2017
I write
Nemo W Jun 2017
I write for the hurt kid in me,
the one that cowers from the world
I write so maybe she'll hurt less
so maybe she'll share more with me
so maybe I'll feel a bit better.
278 · Aug 2017
Little Fire
Nemo W Aug 2017
I see it in your eyes
the fire of your life
and how it excites mine
my heart dances wildly at the flame
as for this longing, the fire is is to blame.
my little fire,
do you want my heart?
or do you wish me to burn under your blaze?
the only thing that will comfort is your gaze
you're all i want and its clear
you're my little fire, dear
For the one I care about.
274 · Dec 2016
Revolting
Nemo W Dec 2016
Crunch, gnaw, slurp, gulp, grinding.

Disgusting.

Why must we sustain by eating other organisms?
Our body lusts for sustenance.
Disturbingly obscene.

We mash what we have into tiny parts to be swallowed,
and dissolved in the acid of our abdomen.
We glutton and hoard what we don't need much of,
indulging in what we should view as sad.

We envelop too much and that sustenance once used to sustain,
is depleting our life battery, our mass grows making us not accepted by our own kind.

The process is foul,nauseating,gruesome.

Is this why i hate eating?
270 · Dec 2016
I hope I live
Nemo W Dec 2016
Hold someone close
cherish the sun setting
smile for yourself
laugh because you feel like it
cry when necessary
love unconditionally
I hope I live
269 · Mar 19
WOMAN
Nemo W Mar 19
an INDIVIDUAL
unbound by standards set
a POWERHOUSE
driven and driving
a CREATOR
conduit of unabashed life
a LOVER
passionate and nurturing
an INTELLECTUAL
keeper of solutions and remedies
a MODERATOR
just and reasonable
a FRIEND
shoulder for tears, ears for support
a SECRET
unbeknownst and ignored
a GODDESS
being of unlimited prowess, divine, absolute beauty
made for a celebration of women im involved in
265 · Dec 2016
Madam Darkness
Nemo W Dec 2016
Madame Darkness,
Why does your ***** press hard against mine?
Why does your word linger in my ear?
Why does your fingers trace shapes on my heart?
Why do you taint my eyes so that i might not see?
Why do you laugh at my struggle yet coddle me when i obey?
Why does your love fall upon me?
Why must it be me?

I wish for love- true
but not from the Queen of Night.
265 · Dec 2016
Muttface
Nemo W Dec 2016
stuck in infinity
i'm a beaten dog.
call it animal abuse.
i'm injured yet forced
to chase the stick.
following my tail in circles.
i never learn.
a stubborn animal.
unworthy of the bone.
constantly following my master.
doing exactly as told.
but still facing the scold.
never perfect like the goldie.
i'm a mutt in a place for champions.
a disgrace to the hierarchy.
yet i'm forced to keep trying
Please, just put me down.
Let me rest.
255 · Jun 2017
lying to myself
Nemo W Jun 2017
tear me up
slice me open
bleed me out
impale my flesh
squeeze out my eyes
it would be better than lies
I tell myself
255 · Jun 2017
Rockford Eggs
Nemo W Jun 2017
It's cold out
but he's so warm
ands inside holds a storm
emotions and thoughts
ecstasy in the lot
but she's lonely
self esteem an all time low
she tells him to go slow
or else she may break
tears turned to a lake
caught in the act
said she has no tact
stuck in the dull and grey
eating Rockford eggs
252 · Aug 2017
i know where the knives are
Nemo W Aug 2017
hey
hey you
i know you're in pain
why not let it all go?
you can do it
you know you can
it's right there
just grab it
just do it
the knives
they're right there
just do it
just do it
just do it
just do it
struggling with this so bad today :'(
237 · Jan 2019
You're Blue
Nemo W Jan 2019
Trapped
in an infinity of struggle and hardship.
Eyes open just to see the whirlwind
and colors of our pain.
The world is shaded in blues and deep purples
like the bruises left all over.
Everywhere the hurt washes out the other colors
what was once vibrant grows dark.
Innocent, ignorant faces change
smiles melt into frowns.
Children grow too fast in this pain
the blue smeared on their sneakers.
We have to run
from the pain and the devastation.
Blue wind whipping your face
tears stream down from your eyes.
You're blue.
I feel the blue.
232 · Dec 2016
Depression
Nemo W Dec 2016
What's mine is the deepest sorrow
living for the past- stuck on tomorrow
surrounded by light
white as snow deaf as night
ripped open and exposed
but they pretend not to know
Nemo W Dec 2016
The ***** that lies inside is tainted.
Pulsing black ink through my every vein.
Intoxicating my brain - unholy being.
Obsidian eyes.
I will breathe plague.
My only friend is shroud.
Skin so cracked from the dry and cold.
Crashing into Angels.
I am a Demon.
230 · Dec 2016
Stars
Nemo W Dec 2016
the stars swallowed my eyes
as i gazed off in the skies
and to my surprise
i didn't die
228 · Jun 2017
New Life
Nemo W Jun 2017
A new life ahead of me
working so hard
i'm scared i'll be
pushed down, strung out,
wrecked up, all again.

A shiny new chance for me
trying all anew
worried now i'll see
turmoil, destruction,
death, all again.

A new life ahead of me
working so hard I know I'll be
strong, confident,
successful, all new.

A shiny new chance for me
trying all anew
happy now I'll see
success, beauty,
life, all new.
226 · Dec 2016
Deep
Nemo W Dec 2016
a solitary room
a lonely desert
a vast ocean
a deep hole

lost connection with the world
you tied me down to not see anyone
my heart surrenders to my captor
which so happens to be depression
225 · Jun 2017
Emptiness
Nemo W Jun 2017
A hole in my chest
bigger than my heart
blow right through me
i'm empty
nothing to see
wind breezes through
whistling a tune
look right through me
i'm empty
nothing to see
221 · Jun 2017
my early life
Nemo W Jun 2017
A Motherless child,
one who cries in the night.
A God-fearing, child rearing Father,
one who tries with all his might.
Two younger, unlike each other.
Vying for the attention, Father.
Crying for the Mother, Father.
Trying to tend the younger, Father.
Flood the house now, save it for later,
Dear Daughter.
216 · Aug 2018
You
Nemo W Aug 2018
You
My heart
it aches for you
the soft linens of your skin
the way it envelops
my paper thins
My heart
it yearns for you
the white wind of your lips
the way it soothes
my black wisps
My heart
it pines for you
the pride of lions of your eyes
the way it penetrates
my blank stares

My heart
come home to my heart
Nemo W Dec 2016
tearing up what's left inside
left to cower and to hide
i'm left with what is mine
a torn heart and ****** wounds
all from you my friend
but i hope i'll see you again
Must be crazy right?
199 · Dec 2016
Spun Sweet
Nemo W Dec 2016
spun sweet
but mislead is she
******* up and spitting out
her life'
watching the falling leaves
tears streaming
heart aching
simply wishing to be free

heart true
but look how blue
wandered and lost
her smile
stretched far and few
love losing
strength fading
wanting something new
199 · Dec 2016
Sometimes
Nemo W Dec 2016
Sometimes
I wonder if life is worth living
I hurt myself to see how much i can take
I stop breathing
I cry until i can't anymore
I attempt suicide
198 · Jan 2019
Undesirables
Nemo W Jan 2019
We are the undesirables
they've tried pushing us down
yet we bounce back to the surface
see us on the streets, at the parks, library, or riding the bus
Our currency is cigarettes
because when all you have is
the monotonous cycle of the day,
those drags are the only thing that takes your breath away.
The undesirables
swim in the tank of society as the sucker fish
feeding on the scraps left behind by others
Driven to madness
they turn to an addiction for an escape from all the horrible experiences in our everyday "life"
****, coke, ******, norcos,
any of it would work for the undesirables
Forced into the stereotype and role that the free put on us, we wallow
we wallow in our own sickness of body, mind, spirit
while they laugh.

After all, we're the undesirables.
Wrote this based on my experiences being homeless.
193 · Dec 2016
Square One
Nemo W Dec 2016
A candle burnt to wick
seeing makes me sick
the clock goes tick tick
a cut,scrape or nick
and i'm back to square one.

i try, try again
but darkness is my friend
the time i had to lend
but i'm nearing to the end
and i'm back to square one.
181 · Dec 2016
My Dream
Nemo W Dec 2016
Walking around in mist
the forest, now an ocean.
So deep, so frightening.
The creatures invite me in,
so i go.

The ocean is red.
Why is it red?
Dazed, i look around.
Holding my breath.
Scared.

When i look down, i know.
All the faded, healed marks-
they're now open and gushing.
Such a beautiful scarlet.
So horribly lovely.

Why didn't i notice?
Why didn't it hurt?
I'm freaking out?
Is this my end?
Why?
179 · Jun 2017
life
Nemo W Jun 2017
The purpose of life
I can't say i'm sure.
Most days i'm too tired
too tired to sleep
if you know what i mean
and the ocean keeps calling
the ocean of sweet demise
my knockout is certain
but only in time
so hard to keep going each day
but i do
so that one day
i'll make it okay for you
176 · Aug 2017
this empty bed
Nemo W Aug 2017
in this empty bed i lay
lost in my thoughts
all in disarray
as i look up to the ceiling
my mind begins reeling
what is this feeling?
all the mistakes
all the hate
all for me
how can it be?
174 · Aug 2017
pain
Nemo W Aug 2017
my mind screams
in agony
so much pain
nothing to gain
my pulse quickens
in stride
so much pain
nothing to gain
173 · Dec 2016
Questions i've been asked.
Nemo W Dec 2016
On a scale of one to ten?
homicidal/suicidal?
hearing things/seeing things?
name three emotions.
how does that make you feel?
increase or decrease?
purge/restrictions?
172 · Dec 2016
Lost in the Notes
Nemo W Dec 2016
close your eyes and breathe in the haze
live for the now and love the days
you missed
you, Ms.
let your ears soak up the sound
a beautiful tirade of noise
spins you right round
and get lost in the notes
170 · Aug 2017
Sock
Nemo W Aug 2017
There's a hole in my sock
and it reminds me of well - me.
168 · Jun 2017
Sleep
Nemo W Jun 2017
O sleep
wrap me in the comfort
of your covers
envelop my sadness
with your warmth
O sleep
bring me with you
into deep dreams
run with my imagination
and keep me clean
O sleep
be my keeper of peace
never fail me,
hide me at the least
from what ails me
O sleep
167 · Dec 2016
Desire
Nemo W Dec 2016
Rip out my heart.
Punch holes in my chest.
Tear flesh apart.
**** pupils with needles
Crumble bone to dust.
Then leave me to rest.
167 · Aug 2017
how id love
Nemo W Aug 2017
how id love to be by your side
how id love to enjoy the ride
how id love to be yours
how id love to be sure
how id love to hold your hand
how id love you to be my man

but distance has us apart
and how it aches my little heart
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