This strange soul calls to mine,
Alluring, fascinating, vexing.
This strange pull, as a rapid wind,
Somehow pushing, still pulling, and taxing.

Strange spirit speaks a foreign tongue.
I speak with no tongue at all.
I would give my soul, my heart, a lung
To stop its decay. Here leaves in fall.

Strange spirit presses soft, then firm.
My spirit falters often.
Strange spirit ever lives and learns,
Cradle, sky, to coffin.

We are not born with fire—
we choose it.
In the silence of doubt,
in the ache of waking pain,
we reach for a flame
that doesn’t burn,
but builds.

Some of us burn
not to destroy,
but to light paths
no one dared walk before.
We carve names into time
with trembling hands
and unwavering hearts.

Creation is not in limbs,
but in vision.
In the breath that shapes words,
in the mind that dares to dream
even as the body folds.

But even fire,
no matter how bright,
must one day soften
into ember.
Even warriors
deserve a gentle sunset.

So when peace calls your name—
when stillness becomes the goal,
not the obstacle—
may you rest with pride,
not regret.

For the world remembers
those who chose to live
with courage,
to create in the dark,
to love in the storm.

And to my friend,
who walks with wisdom and weight,
know this:

You are not fading.
You are finishing—
and every step leaves warmth behind.

oh, the bliss that must come with
the ignorance to your own actions
the knives you spit with vehemence  
whether involuntary or by choice
a deaf man could’ve felt
the disappointment in your voice

**** me, kindly
With your gentle hands
Save me, oh so sweetly
For in your tender grasp
Lies the only cure
To my ugly.
Undesirable.
Unsalvageable pain.

                                                    𝐹𝑟𝑜𝑚 𝑦𝑜𝑢—
                                           𝑀𝑦 𝑐ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑠ℎ𝑒𝑑 𝑓𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑑—
                                                        𝐼­ 𝑏𝑒𝑔—
                                                         𝐽𝑢𝑠𝑡.
                                                         𝑂𝑛𝑒.
                                                        𝑇ℎ𝑖𝑛­𝑔.


                                                      𝑆𝑤𝑒𝑒𝑡𝑙­𝑦.
                                                       𝐾𝑖𝑛𝑑𝑙𝑦.
                                               𝐾𝑖𝑙𝑙 𝑚𝑒—𝑝𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑠𝑒.


Gentle hands
We've already established
Could never do any harm
So clearly—
No harm shall be done
As you
Oh, so kindly
Wrap your gentle hands around my neck
And oh, so sweetly
Squeeze.

                                               ­                                             𝐻𝑜𝑙𝑑 𝑚𝑒 𝑐𝑙𝑜𝑠𝑒𝑟.
                               𝐿𝑒𝑡 𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟𝑦 𝑑𝑒𝑠𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚 𝑑𝑖𝑠𝑠𝑜𝑙𝑣𝑒 𝑖𝑛𝑡𝑜 𝑠𝑖𝑙𝑒𝑛𝑐𝑒.
                                                        ­                                    𝐷𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑙𝑒𝑡 𝑚𝑒 𝑔𝑜.
                                                             ­                         𝐹𝑜𝑟 𝑤𝑒’𝑣𝑒 𝑙𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑒𝑑.
                                                        ­                       𝑇ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑤𝑜𝑢𝑙𝑑 𝑏𝑒 𝑡𝑜𝑟𝑡𝑢𝑟𝑒.
                                                        ­                  𝐻𝑜𝑙𝑑 𝑚𝑒 𝑡𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑡 𝑎𝑠 𝑦𝑜𝑢 𝑐𝑎𝑛.
                                                            ­𝐶ℎ𝑜𝑘𝑒 𝑚𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑠𝑢𝑐ℎ 𝑔𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑙𝑒 ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑠.
                                                          ­                      𝑃𝑟𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑖𝑛𝑛𝑜𝑐𝑒𝑛𝑐𝑒.
                                                      ­              𝐼𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑓𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑙 𝑎𝑐𝑡 𝑜𝑓 𝑑𝑒𝑣𝑜𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛.

𝐀𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐦𝐞—𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐲—
𝐀𝐬 𝐈 𝐛𝐞𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮—
𝐓𝐨 𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐲—
𝐎𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐨𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞.

Cradle me in those loving arms
Attached to such gentle hands
With such fateful grace
Hold my head close
To that half-loving heart.

                                                𝐼𝑓 𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑐𝑒𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛 𝑖𝑠 𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑎𝑚𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑡 𝑡𝑜 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑦—
                                                        ­                𝑇ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑘𝑖𝑠𝑠 𝑚𝑒—𝑠𝑜 𝑔𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑙𝑦—
                                                         ­                 𝑊𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑠𝑒 𝑑𝑒𝑐𝑒𝑖𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑙𝑖𝑝𝑠.
                                                           ­                               𝐿𝑒𝑡 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑏𝑒𝑙𝑖𝑒𝑓𝑠.
                                                        ­     𝐵𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑐𝑢𝑟𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑚𝑦 ℎ𝑜𝑛𝑒𝑠𝑡 𝑚𝑖𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑦.
                                                         ­                  𝐿𝑜𝑢𝑑𝑒𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑛 𝑚𝑦 𝑠𝑐𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚𝑠.
                                                        ­                                   𝑆𝑜 𝑠𝑜𝑓𝑡𝑙𝑦—𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑔.
                                                   𝑊𝑜𝑟𝑑𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑏𝑒𝑎𝑢𝑡𝑖𝑓𝑦 𝑒𝑚𝑝𝑡𝑦 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑡𝑠.
                                                       ­     𝑃𝑟𝑜𝑚𝑖𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑗𝑜𝑦 𝑜𝑓 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑚𝑒𝑟𝑐𝑦.

𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐠𝐫𝐢𝐩—𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲—𝐭𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐧.
𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞.
𝐓𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐬—
𝐀𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐲 𝐧𝐞𝐜𝐤—
𝐈𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞.
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐞—𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐨𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐫 𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞.
𝐇𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐫—
𝐂𝐡𝐨𝐤𝐞 𝐦𝐞—𝐬𝐨𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫—
𝐔𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐥 𝐦𝐲 𝐮𝐠𝐥𝐲.
𝐔𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞.
𝐔𝐧𝐬𝐚𝐥𝐯𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬—𝐟𝐚𝐝𝐞.
𝐋𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐜𝐚𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐧.

I am so feeble beneath your counterfeit love
So weak
That even your tender caress—strips me of breath
Strip me fully
Until I am—nothing more
Let me be—breathless—in your hold
For it is this breath—that brings me pain
It is this life—that burdens me
Torments me
Brainwashes me—into loving you less
Fools me—into loving other things—instead.

                                                ­                               𝑌𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑖𝑛𝑛𝑜𝑐𝑒𝑛𝑡 ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑑𝑠—
                                                          ­           𝑊𝑟𝑎𝑝𝑝𝑒𝑑 𝑎𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑛𝑑 𝑚𝑦 𝑡ℎ𝑟𝑜𝑎𝑡.
                                                         ­                    𝑆𝑜 𝑘𝑖𝑛𝑑𝑙𝑦—𝑦𝑜𝑢 ℎ𝑜𝑙𝑑 𝑚𝑒.
                                                             ­          𝑊𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑦𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑑𝑒𝑐𝑒𝑝𝑡𝑖𝑣𝑒 𝑔𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑒.
                                                          ­                             𝐾𝑖𝑠𝑠 𝑚𝑒—𝑠𝑤𝑒𝑒𝑡𝑙𝑦.
                                                     ­           𝑊𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑡ℎ𝑜𝑠𝑒 𝑙𝑖𝑝𝑠—𝑜𝑓 𝑟𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑖𝑜𝑛.
             𝐺𝑖𝑓𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑚𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑓𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑦 𝐼 𝑦𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑛 𝑓𝑜𝑟—𝑡ℎ𝑟𝑜𝑢𝑔ℎ 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑏𝑒𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑦𝑎𝑙.


𝐍𝐨—𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐞.
𝐈𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐈—𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮.
𝐅𝐨𝐫 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐮𝐫𝐞—𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭—𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞—
𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭 𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐬.
𝐂𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐬.
𝐊𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐦𝐲.
𝐔𝐠𝐥𝐲.
𝐖𝐞𝐚𝐤.
𝐔𝐧𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐲 𝐬𝐨𝐮𝐥.


**** me—kindly.
Please.
Save me—sweetly.
By teaching me—the art of dying.
With every soft hesitant word—
Cheap enough—for me to afford—
Smother me—in the silence—
Where my torment—can finally—vanish.

                                        𝑑𝑒𝑎𝑡ℎ—𝑖𝑠­ 𝑛𝑜 𝑓𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑜𝑚.
                               𝑏𝑢𝑡 𝑓𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑑𝑜𝑚—𝑙𝑖𝑒𝑠 𝑖𝑛 𝑜𝑢𝑟 𝑐ℎ𝑜𝑖𝑐𝑒.
                                        𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑖𝑓 𝐼 𝑚𝑢𝑠𝑡 𝑐ℎ𝑜𝑜𝑠𝑒—
                             will you—
                                                            ­     oh so sweetly—
                                  save me—
                                                             ­               by
                                                 killing me—
                                                     kindly?

Use me—
whatever you need,
I’ll bend, I’ll bleed.
Take the best of me
and then the rest of me—
I won’t make a sound.

Be selfish,
be ruthless,
drain me drop by drop.
I won’t ask for kindness,
I won’t ask you to stop.

My heart is not a temple,
it’s a tool in your hand.
Worn and splintered—still,
I’ll try to understand.

You don’t owe me softness,
you don’t owe me grace.
Just don’t disappear.
Just don’t erase
me.

I don’t need love,
not even your name,
just let me exist
as a player in your game.

I’ll carry the weight,
I’ll silence the ache,
if you only let me
be something you take.

Don’t return a favor,
don’t pretend to care—
just keep me around,
just leave me there.

Use me,
bruise me,
I won’t mind.
I’d rather be broken
than left behind.

I like to pretend the storm that's been raging around me isn't man made, I like to think you're still sleeping on the other side of the bed, I always hope I wakeup to your lips instead of drunken phone calls & empty threats, I think about your hands more than I should and I think about nights in your bed more than I do anything else. I like to remember how you'd smile when you woke up & how you'd pull me closer while you were sleeping. I hope you know your steady breathing was the only thing keeping me sane. I see you in my dreams and I can feel you on my tongue. I wake up to a clenched jaw and grinding teeth, & missed calls from numbers I don't recognise with voices I don't remember. the only number I can remember is yours.

i envy the stars,
the way you would stare at them and smile
how you looked so longingly toward them
you wanted to join them
and then you tried.
in your trying, you did not reach them.
you stayed here, on this rotting rock, stuck with me.
your smile has gone away forever. you dont laugh anymore.

i wish i had never let you envy me.
like i envy you
and envy the great shining lights that surround us.

Lies, deceit
truth stowed away
kept behind clenched teeth
and locked lips
all the while the lies spill
unbound, from desperate mouths
oozing out like honey dripping from
a liar's tongue
Lies, deceit

Please be kind
Have patience with others
They may not be like you

Please listen
Take time to understand others

Please be careful
Your actions may affect others

Please don’t harbor anger
It doesn’t help
Step away if you have to
Please have an open heart
Instead of a closed mind
Please offer love instead of hate
It lifts us all up
Offer someone a smile

Please stand in the light
Instead of the darkness
Lift up the world
With your special light

We walk awkwardly
down the stairs,
that creak.
Don't look back,
and when I say,
pick up the slack,
make a good dash.

Out the front door,
snapping of her pores,
of the bruises
and the brown,
the tightening and soring,
His eyes raging with a crown,
and I become dizzy
the hero to the tale of lore,
is brutalized suddenly.

little ms. perfect,
has a little secret.
She's a big fat liar,
and you can't trust her words.
She cries,
yet she lies.
So whats the point in her?
Her words are like honey,
but be careful,
They sting!
she'll drain you till you drop,
so leave while you can!

These gossamer wings
Have nowhere to fly today
Folded on my back
So, I sit and watch the sky
Waiting for the wind to change

Alone she waits where waves won't sleep,
The sea her grave, the sky her keep.
For love, for hope, for what can't be,
Just bones adrift in memory.

No voice to cry, no soul to see,
Yet still she waits eternally.
Time turned her into bone and air,
But still she lingers, as if one cared.

She spent her time with Mary Jane
     And diamonds in the sky;
She skipped with joy down Penny Lane
     As Rita passed her by.

I am the walrus yesterday
     Tomorrow never knows
Whate'er became of Lucy Gray
     And where her bonnet blows.

I’m tired of hearing people tell me “there are plenty of fish in the sea”
When I’m underwater drowning
I’m tired of hearing people tell me “love will come when you least expect it”
When I’m tired of waiting
I’m tired of hearing people tell me “you need to focus on yourself first”
When I’ve spent so much time alone
I’m tired of hearing people tell me “you need to learn to love yourself and love will come to you”
When I feel like I do love myself
Stop telling me there are plenty of fish in the sea
When I’m drowning.

I'm writing this for fun
am I?
I started thinking that at first
but now do I?
This was just to let my feelings out
but now I second guess
Is this just me,
or my anxiety.

Etched in our faces
The life we played
Everything was loving
never afraid.
Hand in hand we lay
In the sand
Listening to music
From our favourite band.
Couple of old rockers
On beater blockers with a
Smoke and a drink
Etched in our faces
We are living  life
And then it’s over
In a blink.

Let us be happy
Please don’t be sad

Try to be positive
It can’t be that bad

When things go wrong
Try to be strong

Don’t be too proud
Ask for some help

Shout out aloud
And let someone know

Get things put right
That’s the way to go!

I stayed waiting for you to call,
to solve our problems.

I stayed with my lipstick on,
waiting for you to take me to the beach.

I stayed all made up,
waiting for that romantic dinner.

The bed was completely messed up,
from that Fifty Shades of Grey night.

Everything would have been over,
if I had come closer to talk to you.

How hard expectations are.

they see your light
luminescent and burning with pale shades of pink and orange
they love to bask in its warm glow
but they could never sustain it so far

silly girl, always mistaking her own reflection as another's glow
when will you ever learn?

perhaps when your whole world is dim enough
and all the mirrors have fogged up
you will trace that sliver of light
on your own fingertips
in the iris of your eyes

painful, but necessary for you to finally realise
you are what you seek in everything.

'Do or Die '
said I
'Why¿?'
queried they
'Ikigai '
I murmured in reply

Find your place,
a thinking space
you can call your own,
inside your mind
it’s important to find
a private zone,
where you can be you
and first in the queue,
for good mental health
take some time for yourself

Desnuda eres tan simple como una de tus manos,
lisa, terrestre, mínima, redonda, transparente,
tienes líneas de luna, caminos de manzana,
desnuda eres delgada como el trigo desnudo.

Desnuda eres azul como la noche en Cuba,
tienes enredaderas y estrellas en el pelo,
desnuda eres enorme y amarilla
como el verano en una iglesia de oro.

Desnuda eres pequeña como una de tus uñas,
curva, sutil, rosada hasta que nace el día
y te metes en el subterráneo del mundo

como en un largo túnel de trajes y trabajos:
tu claridad se apaga, se viste, se deshoja
y otra vez vuelve a ser una mano desnuda.

Jesus has risen,
Rejoice, He told us He would,
Promised, just did it!

It's a story untold,
A story unheard.
Keep it under the bush, and it shall become common,
Accept it as any other problem, and it shall become uncommon.

Mistreat it, and it shall block progress,
Treat it well, and it shall counter stress.
Mistreat it, and it shall turn the happy gloomy,
Treat it well, and it shall turn the sorrow bloomy.

Attempts were made, she tried to express,
Ignorance she faced, she had to suppress.
Unknown of the fact that it grew,
The society termed it to be a taboo.

A necessity, rather our greatest wealth,
In good shape we all need, our own mental health.
She dared to speak ,
We stated her to be weak.

Thinking

I’m always thinking about

Every word you say
To me

I scrutinize, dissect, gut

Every word you say
To me

I’m thinking that maybe
I’m over-thinking

Every word you say
To me

Maybe I need

To
Just
Silence
your
voice.

Honor reality.❤️ Whatever is happening.

It was not but a secret
Her serenades are asleep.
Yet the breeze carries it,
Toned through wild hills.

It is no secret she remains worn—
Perhaps a thing of the past,
Where she lay—carolling
To winds of her wonder on surface.

A way is but a path to life,
Yet death doesn’t feel any less desolate.
The same lone lyre, played the very same.
Though, when truths to be told—
Being one with the mother seems
Quite peaceful.

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Eternal time to Re-Group +

the loneliness glides over my skin
burrows deeps
and settles into my bones
no matter what I do
it never leaves
I could talk all day to everybody
I could have a million friends
but I would still feel the same
lonely
soul chilling loneliness
never ceasing

the eyes
that glared
daggers
into my heart

the lips
that spilled
sweet words
but left
a scar
on my mind

the hands
that inflicted
pain
that seems
to be
everlasting

why do i
bless the hands
that hurt me
over
and over
again