floating around
just realising i am the afterthought
not the initial
essential
first thing to hand
front of your mind
that is where ego resides
but why must i demand
to be there
the centre of it all?
i expect too highly
i expect that of myself
but to expect that of others
is cruel

my heart has been my achilles’ heel more than a time or two
but I can’t help but be grateful that after everything, the world hasn’t been able to harden it
human nature is selfish motives
but empathy and I have become well acquainted
let my tombstone read “she was soft”
let me give love like I’ll never run out
let me be your resting place
and if you need the air in my lungs
or the organs in-between my bones I’ll give you those too
and if all I ever do is make others feel loved, that will be enough for me

"What would you do for loved ones?"
"Anything."
"What would you do for yourself?"
"Nothing."
"Why not?"
"It's selfish."
"Why is it selfish?"
"Because I'm okay being alone.
They're not."
"First, just because you're okay
Being alone doesn't mean
you should be.
And second, you're not alone.
You have me."

He devoted his whole life
To people he called his friends... his family

He spent his time
His energy
His loving care
To listen and offer guidance

His family
Was perfect
From the outside,
Looking in

But no one ever
Gave a thought
To the pain that he was in

Through all of his struggles
He stood strong
The years had been ******* him for far too long
And he bore his burdens alone, time after time

Not a single friend
To confide

Not a single kin
To offer him wisdom

They were there
But they never cared
As they were always complaining selfishly
Of their petty qualms
To which he listened
Selflessly

It's not that he didn't try
To seek refuge in them
They were too consumed
Basking in their own greed

To hear

His

Cries

For

Help...




They never could see
How broken he was
Until it was too late

They should have
listened...

They should have
cared...

But they simply had no time to spare

They all see it on the news,
They all turn the TV off
“Poor girl, poor thing
Too sad, too bleak.”
They ignore all the worries
And put on a smile
But when it happens to Them, it’s everything.
They shout on the rooftops and cry so people know
But the rest of Them don’t listen at all
“Poor girl, poor thing
Too sad, too bleak.”

No one could ever dream to have you beat
in self destruction, self pity and defeat,
it’s almost bittersweet.
But you get by, it’s you not I,
you get by with a plan to only die.
Yes you get by, with any chance to cry,
never noticing another’s sigh.

You know with all the licks you’ve been taking,
we’re both surprised that you’re still waking.
Oh and with the hits you’ll keep taking,
don’t be surprised that you’re still shaking.

Let’s get straight to the root of the problem,
slam our heads together; we’ll forget if not solve them.
So what’s your story you’ve got for me today?

I am no stranger to your sad tales,
though you push them right off the rails,
and my own attempt is exempt and always fails,
I’d have better luck pitching them as sales.
As you’d get by, just for a high,
only to try with your plan to die.
Yes you get by, it’s always you not I,
claiming life’s got you in it’s eye.

You know with all the kicks you’ve been taking,
it’s a wonder you’re still not breaking.
Oh and all the tricks you’ve been making,
are you shocked we think you’re faking?

Let’s get straight to the root of the problem,
you act the saint and cast I as the goblin.
So what’s your story, exaggerated allegory, today?
Let’s cut right to the root of the issue,
my hands are full but do you need a tissue?
I’ll say sorry, just ignore me and what I have to say.

So open up the bursting flood gate
direct the flow to where I seem to wait,
it’s truly my ears that suffer the most,
I abandoned thought not my post, though I now am late.
But you get by, and still yet defy
magnify on your plans to die.
You’ll always get by, call it a lie,
focusing on rain ignoring you’re dry.

Oh with all the trips you’ve been taking,
It’s no surprise you’ve been strongly flaking.
And with the drips and the lies that have been caking,
you can’t comprehend anyone else aching.

So let’s get straight to the root of the problem,
I’ll start a list and another separate column.
So what’s your story, for attention or glory today?
Let’s cut right to the root of the issue,
hands on your neck and checking your wrist too,
it’s mandatory and obligatory, but morally grey.

Disgusting
Unpleasant
Rotting
Selfish
Materialistic
Disrespectful­
Weak
Desperate
Rude
Arrogant
Controlling
Racist
Deceitful
Vermin­ous

I have come to realize that the hardest thing
to do is not picking out an option from two that
are very similar in nature, but rather putting myself first.

how can you love someone
and trust in them,
when you only carry love
for anyone but for yourself,
because you don't trust
in you,
and you can't love you.