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21.4k · Nov 2018
Ask me "anything".
moon child Nov 2018
"I'm an open book"
She says

Written in
code.
3.3k · Apr 2017
Okay I swore. Once.
moon child Apr 2017
Hey
So I'm gay.
Apparently it's everybody's ******* business
While simultaneously being something that
No one talks about.

Oh that's great that your friend's aunt is a lesbian.
You know what we do in bed is sort of private I'd rather not talk about it at the bar.
No, no we don't want a ******* sir please stop asking I'm getting uncomfortable.

Is that normal?
Should it be?
To have questions asked so publicly. So out of line.
So obtrusive.

To have people tell on me as though I broke a vase or pushed my sister.
Oh, no, she's gay. This is my friend, but she's gay. No don't bother, she's gay. Gay gay gay.

I'm gay. Fine. Yes.
I'm not afraid of it.
Please stop giving me reason to be.
2.5k · Apr 2017
Her.
moon child Apr 2017
It's crazy that I lived
before her.
That I went through my days, good or bad or what have you,
and I didn't have her there.
With her,
nothing is meaningless.
There is no good,
no bad,
no what have you.
There is only me
and there is only her.
And that is all we need anymore.
Just us.
every day. forevermore.
2.4k · Jan 2018
I can't think
moon child Jan 2018
Without her
What am I supposed to do?
Words lose their meaning.
Taste
Sight
Sound
Touch.
Without her
What do I have?
Bland
Darkness
Silence
Emptiness.
Without her.
I miss her
2.1k · Nov 2018
Found you
moon child Nov 2018
Gone missing
Last seen
Running
From
Myself
1.8k · Dec 2016
That's you blue
moon child Dec 2016
The only one
That can turn an overwhelming moment
Into a lovely memory
1.7k · Dec 2016
My one. So blue.
moon child Dec 2016
distance can be
difficult
when you
are so far
from your
other
I miss you blu
1.6k · Dec 2016
Come back to me Take me home
moon child Dec 2016
A love like this doesn't need a label.

A love like this just needs to be stable.
1.5k · Nov 2016
Introduce
moon child Nov 2016
Hello,
My name is
Gay.
1.5k · Dec 2016
My look your look
moon child Dec 2016
The only time
That I can say
In all honesty

That I was sure
That I was happy
That I was home

Was when she glanced to the side
And it was me
That she was looking for.

There's no coming back
From that love.
1.4k · Mar 2019
Until we part.
moon child Mar 2019
Falling in love
When you have an agenda
Is so
Painful
1.4k · Dec 2016
My girl.
moon child Dec 2016
I will love her
Forever.

There will never be a night
That I don't dream
In memories
Of her.
1.3k · Jun 2019
Not enough
moon child Jun 2019
I'm
Trying
My
Best.

Crying
In
My
Car
But
Doing
It
Well.
1.3k · Mar 2019
Desperation.
moon child Mar 2019
I don't want to spend my youth
Without
In order to spend my future
With

I am willing to throw my tomorrow
Into the wind
As payment for a better
Today

I will risk what lies ahead
To ensure peace where I am
Right
Now

The future is not guaranteed.
The future is not a given right.
The future is not fair.

Today is sure.
Today is a gift.
Today is what I wake up to every morning.

So I will not stop living
For the future.
I will live on
For today.
1.2k · Dec 2018
He said. She said.
moon child Dec 2018
"You're so ******* ****"
After she got done ****** me.

"Hey you up?"
4am from a man working at the liquor store I frequent.

"If you weren’t such an *** tonight I would’ve liked to cuddle with you"
A bartender at my regular bar.

"Hey I'm not complaining. You can beat my *** anytime."
An uber driver after I jokingly said I would beat him up. He was a retired police officer.

"Come on. You never even gave me a chance!"
A close friend of 3 years who was upset that I started dating someone else and not him. He didn't talk to me for over 2 years after.

"Seems like you're taking whoever's available at this point."
My manager after I disclosed to her a **** that happened to me days prior.

"Come on, can't I just get a hug?"
A stranger in a bar.

"What? What what's wrong? Come on."
A man in a bar when I wouldn't drop the fact that he had just stuck his hand on my **** and between my legs.

"Well you have to be careful that you're not flirting or being too nice to men."
My father after I told him about an uncomfortable situation with a bartender hitting on me.

Do not call me babe.
Don't call me dear
Honey
Sweetie
Love
Do not touch me.

I am not
For
You.
1.2k · Oct 2018
Red. Yellow. Blue.
moon child Oct 2018
Jai guru deva om

The Universe
Has a funny way
Of bringing things
Together
1.2k · Dec 2016
Every thing
moon child Dec 2016
You would think
That every little thing
That reminds me of you
Would bring
A grin
Of nostalgia.

But that fan
That reminds me of the way
Your hair blew in the wind

And the blanket
That reminds me of the times
We hid ourselves from the world

Only further remind me
That I am here alone
With these memories
And you are back home.
1.2k · Dec 2016
My Lady in Blue
moon child Dec 2016
She was so much like a dream

Only with her

I truly believed

That I would never wake up.
Until she left.
1.2k · Sep 2018
No need to get involved.
moon child Sep 2018
I can't do this anymore.
What kind of life is this?

I'm a secret.
A ***** disgusting
Pointless secret.

Who cares if I whisper this mess
In their ear.
To cup my hands 'round the side of their face
And expose myself to them.

No one wants to hear about the hamster wheel spinning round and round in my head.
The tap tap tap of anxious could be's and angry could have been's.
Disappointment chain smokes out my arteries and throws the simmering cigarette butts into the pit of my stomach.
Hoping to start a flame.
To burn me up.
Inside out.

That's not a pretty story.
Not a fairy tale.
People want happy poems or depressing fables.
Ones that they don't have to look in the eyes afterward.

I have no interest in sharing doubts that gnaw away at my fingertips or the fears that grind my teeth.

Everything is fine
Is fine
Just
Like
This.
Just leave it.
Leave it alone.

It will go away
Or it will **** me yet.
No need.
1.0k · Dec 2016
Home is where we are.
moon child Dec 2016
I love her so much
But she's leaving me soon
All my wishes are that she would stay.

And I kiss her so often
My lips are all chapped
But with each kiss
She's moving
Further
and further
Away.
922 · Sep 2019
soul
moon child Sep 2019
You pull away
As if to say
You'd rather leave
Then make me stay.
858 · Dec 2018
Her garden
moon child Dec 2018
I am
Experiencing
This
Phenomena

Where I am ready and willing and
Safe

I feel the capacity
Within me
To move forward
To pursue
To advance

Simultaneously
I watch myself
Dream for tears to fall.

To feel
To express
To experience
The loss that has felt
Far too safe
In the pit
Of my stomach.

See my face,
But listen for the voice that begs to be
Set
Free.
848 · Oct 2018
Falling
moon child Oct 2018
Seems I've been
Missed by the
Rain
806 · Jan 6
You can fly. I cannot.
moon child Jan 6
I am not
doing so well
...
Little bird.
735 · Dec 2018
sleepsleepsleep
moon child Dec 2018
Waking up
Can be
Terrifying
When reality
Is chasing
You down
708 · Nov 2018
Speak up sweetie.
moon child Nov 2018
"You can talk to us"
They say

Duct tape in
Hand.
704 · Nov 2018
Tumble.
moon child Nov 2018
She is not
Here
For
You
She is here
To simply
Be
691 · Nov 2018
A moment of silence.
moon child Nov 2018
Right now
In this moment
I am simply
Me

My anxiety has no hold on me
My depression is at rest

Self doubt and loathing have hidden themselves to give way to calm.

I am at peace.
I am me.
I am free.
612 · Feb 26
Glow stick
moon child Feb 26
"I am
    Broken."

   "Darling,
   That's how you
   Shine."
574 · Dec 2018
Please forget.
moon child Dec 2018
When you first
Saw
Her
Did you
Stop
Breathing

The way you
Stopped
Breathing
When you first
Saw
Me
?
513 · Feb 2019
Touch
moon child Feb 2019
Searching for contact
In each set of eyes
I meet
502 · Dec 2018
Kiss for you
moon child Dec 2018
This love for you
Is floating above me

No chance
Of me
Pulling it
Back
Down
467 · Nov 2018
Drive.
moon child Nov 2018
Giving gifts to
Satiate the
Pain.
451 · Nov 2018
Rest Quinn.
moon child Nov 2018
She's safe in the ground.
I know.
Death has a way of
Protecting you.

Still I wish she were laughing
In the kitchen.
446 · Oct 2018
Arachnid
moon child Oct 2018
Grace and poise
abounding.

Fear instilled
belated.

Lamented life
impassive.

Rationale in
liquidation.

A life without
proposal.

Death in all its
splendor.
Inspired by Billie Eilish
438 · Nov 2018
Not. Mine.
moon child Nov 2018
A kiss.

Used to
Mean
Something.

Used to covet
A kiss.

Desire.
Crave.
Love.

A kiss.
Now?

If it's not for
You.

What's the point anymore.
blue.
429 · Nov 2018
Sleep me off my feet dear.
414 · Feb 2017
Longdistance
moon child Feb 2017
living off of memories
eyes closed
replay
eyes
lips
hands
hips
stop
rewind
replay
blu
395 · Jan 2019
Sexual Assult *TW: rape*
moon child Jan 2019
I remember it
In bits and pieces.

Here and there I catch a sense of
Foreboding.
Of something coming.
Of knowing that
No matter how much I try
No matter how far I go in life,
This will never leave me.

I have been sexually assaulted.
By two different people
In my life.

I was
Nineteen
When I started dating him.

Nineteen and my
First
Boyfriend.

He has red hair and a
Jaded past.
A bad boy with a
Gap-toothed smile.

I was taught
To save myself.
To not have *** with a man
Until I was married.

He showed me
That there is a lot two can get away with
Before marriage.

I thought he loved me.
He told me so just two short weeks into our relationship.

I believed him
Because I had never done this before.

I thought
he would know, wouldn't he?
I suppose
"I love you too."

From there I found that
Love
Had a funny way of
Proving itself.

It was Easter or Christmas
Or some Christian holiday
When he pulled a blanket over us and
Stuck his hand
Down my pants.

His uncle was in the room.
Engaged in a Vikings football game.
His mom and
Sister and
Aunt and
Cousins
Were making cookies
In the kitchen.

I remember the details of the space
I was violated
In a desperate attempt
To forget
The act.

This happened often.
And openly.
In the backseat of his parents car
As they drove us to their home.

In his sister's retired bedroom as I awoke to him
On top of me.
I thought of the jewelry on her old dresser.
How she chose the ones she cared for
And left the rest behind to be
Forgotten.

Years passed with the memory staying in my mind as though it were a song I chose to memorize.

I met her in a bar.
I had known her.
We had flirted.
She stole kisses all night and proudly proclaimed that
I was "here with her!".

I felt safe.
I knew the crowd.
I took care
Of myself.

After threats of renting a hotel for us
I drove her home.
We were laughing.

She lived with her parents.
In the basement.

The upstairs lights promptly shut off
As she drunkenly stepped inside.

She led me to the basement and I turned as the door slammed shut.
Locking her cat outside.
Begging to come in.

My neck
Hurt for weeks.
That's what happens,
I suppose,
When you're caught by the back of your hair and
Tossed
Across a bed.

My head whipped over the side of the sheets and retracted
As she slapped me across the face.

"I like it rough"
She chimed.
I did not.

Casual pleading
Will only get you so far
When you beg
To be let out of this room.
I envied the cat.

I couldn't stop it so I
Took care
Of myself.

Laying empty,
Broken,
And dry
On her sheets
I dreamed I would be allowed
To go home.

Saliva
Can be a lubricant.
Did you know?
Even if it is ripped from your own
Throat.

******* penetrated my lips,
And then,
So much more.

As I staggered out she tossed words
Like
"****"
"Hot"
And
"I'll text to tomorrow"
At my body.

My body
Does not always feel
Like a safe place.

My body
Bruises and
Bleeds and
Weeps.

My body
Shakes
For weeks.

But I
Am not
My body.

And I
Will take care
Of myself.
395 · Jul 2019
Hello?
moon child Jul 2019
Another year
Still here

Once upon a time there was
A young girl who dreamed
That she would
Ride
Around
The world.

I haven't done it.
But for an extra charge
I could
Call
Someone
In China.
393 · Sep 2019
Cant we do this
moon child Sep 2019
Baby
I just wanna
love you
won't you
won't you
Let me
359 · Oct 2018
Painted heart.
moon child Oct 2018
She's red.
Fiery and exciting
Strong and demanding respect
Deserving it as well.

She changes things
She steals the moment
She steals the show

Every time
She smiles.
She's red.
And God
Do I love that color.

She was blue for a while
Sweet and kind and concerned.

Calming music.
Calming color.
They put it up in hospitals and bedrooms.
Baby boy blue.
It's supposed to settle you
Help you breathe.

When she was blue,
Breathing wasn't a chore.
When she was blue
Living was second nature.
She had me at Blue.

She was gray once.
That confusing in between the lines type of gray
Where it might be a nice day.

Foggy
Overcast
Sweet

The sun trying to get through.
She was covering the Sun
But still I knew
Below
That she was Gray.

The first time she changed color

She was orange.

The space between
Different shades.
Not quite sure
What to expect.
Not quite sure
How she should be treated.

So she became Orange.

It wasn't beautiful.
It wasn't soft.
It was unforgiving.

Not a sunset.
Not a
Ripe
Bright
Fruit.
A hazard jacket.
                            BEWARE OF HUNTERS
She was prey.
And the orange
Was consuming her.

When she was
Orange.

She started out so plain.
Unsure of what colors
Might consume her.

Unsure of how they might
Change her.

She may be a rainbow now,
But,
While she seems beautiful,
All the colors others see,
She knows

That the bits of

Orange
              and
Gray
              and
Blue
          ­    and
Red

Mean so much
More.

My heart
Has seen a painter's brush
Or two.

She's changed shades
To suit her suitors.

But the heart
Is Red.

And now that I'm in charge

Red it will remain.
351 · Dec 2018
Breathe deeply
moon child Dec 2018
Mother doesn't want a frantic beauty
347 · Nov 2018
Could've.
moon child Nov 2018
I miss the way
I desperately wanted
My life
To be
329 · Oct 2018
Strawberries.
moon child Oct 2018
So many little
Things have
New purpose
New meaning

Nothing's gonna change my world

But I might.
324 · Dec 2018
Imagination.
moon child Dec 2018
Listen.

I know you're moving on.
You have every right to be and it's none of my business anymore because
//we're not together//
Anymore.

I never cared in the past.
//I've never felt sick.//
I've never lost sleep.
//I've never lost all feeling.//
When previous
Exs
Moved on.

But you were the first.
Of everything.

To me
You were my everything.

First real love //First real ****// First real heartbreak //First real loss//

You
Were
My
First

And it feels like
Everything
And
Nothing

Now you're gone.

And I crave that connection
//And I ******* hate it//
And I fear it
//And I search for it//

But

Without you

All of life
Is
Make-believe.
320 · Dec 2018
You and Me
moon child Dec 2018
Curly hair and
Sweet
Dreams
319 · Jan 2019
She does
moon child Jan 2019
Only the finest of artwork on my walls
Mark Rothko
Gustav Klimt
And countless photos of you
318 · Nov 2018
Just.
moon child Nov 2018
My
Heart
Traced on a
Foggy
Window
Pane
318 · Oct 2016
I love. In love.
moon child Oct 2016
I love
your feet because they take you to me
I love
your arms because they hold me
I love
your ears because you listen
I love
your cheeky toothy smile because it warms me
I love
your lips because you kiss me
I love
your eyes because you really see me
And I love
your heart because you love me
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