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Jan 2017 · 1.1k
Be me
Aiman Jan 2017
Feel my pain, bare my burden
Let me give you the suffering that you've created

Feel my insecurities, explore my mind
In the deepest darkest part
you will find

Can you get through the night?
It's a dare you should try

For my mind is a never ending maze
A constant battlefield

Be me I will say, get in my mind
Go ahead

You'll survive, you'll get out
But feeling a bit sane after that?

Oh I doubt not
Aug 2016 · 1.2k
Numb
Aiman Aug 2016
These burst of emotions
deep inside, trapped within
suicidal thoughts, full of sins
i'm drowning with emotions
that i do not understand
make it stop i begged
but it won't heed to my command
so i stare at my reflection
of what had i become
i am a slave to my own feelings
i am numb
Nov 2014 · 816
A Broken Angel
Aiman Nov 2014
She's losing hope, she had lost her way
Every path that she takes turns
dark with a shade of grey
It seems like everyone she knew
never stayed, left words unsaid
Her heart just sank to the thought
of how easily she was forgotten
Somehow all the promises they made
meant nothing but to be broken
People who once she knew
were now strangers
Were they the ones who had changed
or was it her who pushed them away?
She's no longer capable of trusting anyone
because the person that she once trusted
betrayed her, she was bitterly gutted
The only person left to trust is herself
but the dark soul inside her
kept on whispering bad things
telling her she's no longer needed
that she's not worth it
and she was just a big mistake instead
Constant battles with her mind every day
the nights were the worst
she was always wide awake
Trying her best to make the thoughts stop
the pain she felt was unbearable no doubt
She was alone, no one to care for her feelings
It's better that she's gone maybe then they will notice
She found a way to make her problems disappear
and on the last day, she said
her goodbyes to the ones she loved
That night sat a broken angel waiting to be rescued
then she said farewell and away she flew
Oct 2014 · 1.0k
Feelings for sale
Aiman Oct 2014
I wish to sell my feelings for a dollar or two
Because I don't know how much longer I can go through
It's better not to feel then dealing with the pain
All it's good at is making your heart ache
I'm trying my best to act like I don't care
but in the end I'm the one that ended up feeling despair
"It's okay. I'm fine, there's nothing to worry."
Things you say to them when they tell you "I'm sorry"
So the same question I ask myself each time
What did I do to deserve to be treated like this?
Or maybe they have forgotten that I even have feelings...
Oct 2014 · 1.0k
Wasted tears
Aiman Oct 2014
when there's something wrong
she listens to sad songs
and sits on her bed
holds her pillow
wraps herself
and cries

when the whole world is against her
she has no one to be on her shoulder
so she sits on her bed
holds her pillow
wraps herself
and cries

when she's too scared to say a word
she thinks it's better to hide
because people like to judge
so she sits on her bed
holds her pillow
wraps herself
and cries

she tried to be tough
trying to face her life
but she's not strong enough
she can't hold the tears
so she sits on her bed
holds her pillow
wraps herself
and cries
though it's my birthday i don't feel happy. so i just cried. it's ****** i'm sorry :(
Oct 2014 · 1.8k
Dear Darling
Aiman Oct 2014
i don't have much
but i'll give you my heart
though it's broken not whole
but darling i promise you
i'll love you with all my soul

i don't have much
but i'll give you my loyalty
and love you unconditionally
i know how it feels like to be cheated on
so darling trust me
i would never do you wrong

i don't have much
neither i'm beautiful nor i'm pretty
i even have scars on my body
and darling you don't have
to change for me
when i look at you
only perfection is all i see

i don't have much
but if you need someone to talk to
even at 3 am
i'll be there for you
to make you feel better
tell me your problems
and darling i promise i will listen

i don't have much
but i'll try my best to make you happy
feeling your world
with joy and laughter
no more troubles
no more worries
just you and me darling i promise
wrote something happy for a change :)
Oct 2014 · 2.1k
A Haunting Past
Aiman Oct 2014
My past is haunting me still
Harassing me against my will
If only i could erase my past
Wouldn't my mind be much happier perhaps?
But it's still there, it's going nowhere
Imprisoned in my mind
Waiting for the right time
To torture me again and again
Pain after pain till i'm going insane
If only....
Oct 2014 · 2.2k
Trapped inside
Aiman Oct 2014
When loneliness consumes you
that's when your true feelings
and thoughts start
to push through

In the deepest darkest part
of your mind
Questions after questions  
begin to feel up inside

What's worse is you still hope
for them to go away
But the harder you try
the longer they stay

You've lost your sanity
you've lost all control
What's left are your awful thoughts
*and your numbing soul
Oct 2014 · 1.3k
Turn back time
Aiman Oct 2014
Give me a time machine
I want to go back to
the beginning

All the things that were
left unsaid
Now they are just thoughts
in my head, lying dead

All the things I should
have done
To avoid being the person
that I have become

And all the people I would
wish to never meet
They are the reasons why
I cut deep

If only I could turn back time
I would undo all these
mistakes of mine

But now it's too late
my heart is full of regrets
Seems like my future and
everything is pitch black

Take me back to the time
before i became a wreck
Can i please have my old self back?
Sep 2014 · 453
Untitled
Aiman Sep 2014
There are so many things
*i wish that i am

*and i wish that i am not
Sep 2014 · 1.4k
Suicide
Aiman Sep 2014
According to society,
you need to have a flawless face,
pale skin,
skinny stick figure,
long legs,
nice hair,
and attractive eye brows
to be called beautiful

What a ****** up world we live in
Labeling god's creation as pretty or ugly
Who are you to judge they say
but the suicide rates keep on increasing
each day

Yes *******.

You don't believe me?
Well suicide is never just about
killing yourself
To make yourself something less
than what you are--
that too is a form of suicide

Suicide does not mean that
there's no killer
Words are like weapons,
they ****
They leave scars that can
never heal

Don't be a killer. I've warned you.

Next time when you feel like
insulting someone,
Put yourself in their shoes,
what would you feel
if they did that to you?
What if someone called
one of your family members bad names,
wouldn't you feel hurt as well?

Have a heart,
please care about other people's feelings
Got a brain?
well think wisely before you hurt someone
Got feelings?
then you must know how does it feel
to be hurt by someone right?

*It's all up to you.
Sep 2014 · 7.0k
Your voice
Aiman Sep 2014
Your voice* is my addiction
my drug, my ******
the only person i want to listen
that sound is my current obsession

your voice is my lullaby
the melody i hear every night
the sweetest voice
that tucks me in
you're the one to help me
get to sleep

your voice sounds like home
to accompany me when
i'm alone
and every time we're talking
on the phone
somehow it feels like
you're sitting close

Even though we're so far away
hearing your voice could
light up my day
cause right now i miss you dearly
and i can't wait to hear your voice, baby.
It's not that good, but i've tried. Specially made for someone i love :)
Aiman Sep 2014
I was on the verge of falling
into pieces
telling myself there's nothing
for me to hold on
thinking to myself i was better
off dead
rather living in this world
that's full of weeping and
sadness

There i was on the edge
of breaking
feeling suffocated
i can barely breathe
then came an angel reaching
out his gentle hand
"Hey, nice to meet you", he said.

I was full of doubts but you
convinced me
I've never trusted anyone but you
changed it
slowly my feelings towards you
blossomed
and as i got to know you
even more
each time i fall even
harder

You were there for me
in every step of the way
when i'm lonely
you would accompany me
when i'm feeling down
you were the one who would
turn my frown upside down

And when i needed a shoulder
you'll be the one
no matter what i do
you'll always be there to
help me through

You showed me your flaws
so i showed you mine
we shared secrets that we swore
to forever keep inside

You began to appear inside my mind
too often, too much
your smirks and smiles drove me wild
your stares and touch gave me
butterflies

This feeling was new
i was really confused
so i asked myself
"is this what love does to you?"

so i kept this love buried
inside my heart
for my mind was still full of doubts
will your love for me be
as strong as mine?
or will my love for you
only stay in my heart and mind?
Sep 2014 · 941
Thoughts
Aiman Sep 2014
It's 3 am but she's still wide awake
no matter how hard she tried
she couldn't stop the ache
the night was dead and so were her feelings
the pain in her heart was terribly hurting

Pacing back and forth in her room
trying her best to let the feelings loose
all she could think of right now
was her pills and razors
to her that's the only way,
the only answer

And with all her might
she avoided the suicide
she closed her eyes and prayed
for the demons inside her
to subside

Torn apart by the people
who treated her wronged
she's just a girl who wanted
to feel belonged

Her eyes were swollen and burning
from the tears that had fallen
as she lied on her bed
with her pillow clutch tightly
by her side
eyes closed but her thoughts were
still running wild

All she wanted was to fall asleep
because to her that's the only
place where everything
is still all right
no problems
no sorrows
no pain

As she stared at the empty ceiling
of her spacious bed room
at this point she was
already numb
the clock started to ring
it showed 6 am

She got up out of bed and went
straight to the toilet
the mirror showed her face
looking absolutely tired
as she looked closer she saw
dark circles appeared beneath her eyes
so that's when she said to herself
*"I've lost to my thoughts again this time"
Aug 2014 · 748
Let it out
Aiman Aug 2014
those nasty thoughts linger
in her head
sitting there alone in her room
on her bed
she wanted it to stop but it
kept on going
it's driving her mad, her mind
is insane

she's getting restless, her patience
grows weaker
she's a loner with no friends
or a foe
she needed to find a way to
let it out
and writing on her skin was
the only way she knew how

and so her beautiful skin became
her diary
all the marks of her misery
each lies an untold story
where she kept it secretly from
*everybody
Aug 2014 · 333
Light
Aiman Aug 2014
and suddenly, nothing feels right
these uncertain thoughts lingering inside
pretty please just for tonight
please be my saving light?
#alone  #light #thoughts #lost #depression #sad #help

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