Occasionally I inquire what it'd be like to be
A mind as shallow as those around me

They never think of anything unusual
Nothing that they haven't heard before
Nothing they aren't told to, nothing crucial
They never search for keys to unopened doors

How boring it must be to live in such a brain
Where imagination simply doesn't exist
Where all that they dream up is purely plain
And nothing ever has an unexpected twist

They don't ask questions that don't have answers
They can't stand stillness and never stop to ponder
All that they speak is meaningless banter
They refuse to open their minds to galaxies of wonder

But every once in a while I get curious
Until I'm quickly reminded of their invariance

Come on in! Step inside!
Don't forget: try to hide!
Cover your weary face
With soft ribbons and lace.
You'll win at any task
If you just wear this mask.
Don't ever let them know.
Don't let emotions show.
We'll teach you a smooth dance,
So you'll live in a trance.
Your face will never fall
Within this sacred hall!
Life will be a parade!
Come to the masquerade!

I just want to sleep, but I fear my dreams
That always carry me to startling extremes
Where tears and blood flood the streams
Where air's polluted with children's screams

Sometimes, I briefly feel nicer things
I'll feel like a bird with feathered wings
But then I'll remember the puppet strings
And all the turmoil that they bring

Then, at times, I remember nothing at all
And I wake up feeling like a limp rag doll
Staring blankly at an empty wall
Without motivation even to crawl

Ring around the rosie
Red inflamed circles of hurt
Keep them hidden deep because
People are terrified
That pain is contagious

Pocket full of posies
Show the world only beautiful things
Because everything comes with strings
And they don't want to see
The truth and harsh reality

Ashes, ashes
Burn your faults and burn your fears
So that no one will ever find them here
Put on a mask to hide your melted face
So that no one will ever see your disgrace

We all fall down*
Don't ever let them see you trip
Though we all do the same and rip
The only difference between us is our names
For we are *all hiding our shame

Skin made of frost
Hair made of snow
Thought to be lost
But only she knows

Dashes around
Quick as her fox
Never is bound
But destiny knocks

The cold gives life
It pumps her heart
Never caused strife
Love tore her apart

It took her down
Though she was warned
She falls and drowns
When a child is born

And as she melts
Without the cold
She knew she felt
What she had been told

The sun beats down on my boiling body,
Defeating the last morsels of energy left in it.
A concoction of sunscreen and sweat covers my skin,
As I reach to feel the rays beaming into my skull.
My fingertip gently touches my crimson cheek,
Anticipating a needle ***** upon contact.

The heat seeps from the pavement,
Through my sandals, I feel my feet burn.
This concrete is hot enough to host a cooking show,
And it seems I’m being served as the main course.
Hoping to cool my toes, I step aside into the grass,
That wilts with weariness as I do beneath the sun.

The sun causes such misery when the clouds hide,
And yet our mere existence depends upon it.
These precious and plentiful ultraviolet jewels of light,
Possess such a power in their incandescence.
And as the sun’s gravity pulls our planet into orbit,
We must force ourselves to acknowledge its importance.

There's a quality to her smile
That these days is not often seen
One that triggers memories
Of places you'd hate to leave

There's a depth inside of her eyes
Of oceans deep and rivers wide
No submarine could endure
The bottom of her waters

There's a sad ache to her touch
A whisper on her wind
That brings you oh so close to her
Then let's you go again

There's a graveness in her voice
A silence filled with screams
That penetrates your very soul
If you dare to listen

Would you like to know a secret
If you do, this one's for free
If you care to dare to look real close
You'll see this girl is me

Those eyes captivate me
When I look into them
I lose the ability to breathe

Those eyes reach into me
They grab my stomach
And tie it in a thousand knots

Those eyes devastate me
I cannot know about the
Universe that lies inside them

Those eyes are a mystery
But a miniscule clue
Has been left behind...

And I don't know what to do.

Don't cry, don't cry
Not now, not here
Don't let them see it anywhere
Hold your breath and count to ten
Then slowly let it out again
Point your chin up to the sky
Look up and then wipe your eyes
Put a cork in it
No one wants to see
How you're hurting
How you feel

It was late in the spring,
And the flowers had bloomed.
But though the birds did sing,
One thought she'd be doomed.

Afraid of what laid beyond her walls,
She kept closed in a bud, so nobody knew
Of her catastrophic inner-world brawls
Or why her stem and petals never grew.

What if they think I'm too pretty,
And I quickly get picked?
What if I'm planted in a big city,
And my petals are torn up and pricked?

And after so long of nothing but questions,
She'd had enough of that chatty buttercup.
So she took the other flowers' suggestions,
And ever so slowly, she began to open up.

But just as her petals reached for the sky,
A cold wind made her shudder. An early frost
Had snuck into autumn. Yes, autumn, I cry!
And immediately, she became very crossed.

Why did you tell me that I'd see the sun,
And that it would be warm and colorful?
Where did all this cold white powder come from,
And why is the wind so painfully powerful?

But as she panicked she looked around
To find that no other flowers were to be seen.
And with none of them to be found
She wasn't sure what she thought of this scene.

She got angry and decided they were all closed.
Her perception of the outside had been an illusion.
She knew now that she loathed being exposed
And came to her conclusion:

*I will go back to my hiding place,
And never again shall I come back,
Because I so much long to be encased,
Away from this painful and viscous attack.

I often want to tell you,
But, you see, I'm too afraid.
So I go and live my life
The host of a masquerade.
One day, I'll lie in my grave
Buried by the earth and *****.
Regret things I never said
And all the mistakes I made.

*Words left unspoken
Will bury you alive.

While tending to the wounds of others
Crowded emotions seem to smother
Used as a distraction from our own pain
And happens to work out for others' gain
On the inside all we feel is void
Until we are completely destroyed
So do not get lost in the raging flood
And drown in your own pool of blood

What am I to tell my soul,
When the stars are out of reach?
What am I to tell my heart,
When they don’t want my touch?
What am I to tell my mind,
When I can’t understand what’s wrong with me?
What am I to tell my body,
When I can’t feel anything anymore?
What am I to tell you,
When you ask me what’s wrong?
What am I to tell the world,
When they expect achievements?
What am I to tell my soul.
When the stars are out of reach?

on this earth
in this place
things are used
as strings
for the puppet
of the population
the dancing marionettes
to not think
for themselves
they believe what
they are told to
and do not question
but questions
are important
they are a necessity
to our very survival
they want diversity
yet persecute
the truly diverse
what thought is this
that they believe
they call for logic
but do not use it
they call for peace
but start wars
they plead for love
but harbor hatred
they demand equality
and equal understanding
for different opinions
yet they do not accept
those of the people who
don't agree with them
they call for rights
then elect restrictions
and immobilities
into the office
what is this thought
what is this day
that we must live in?

As I close my drooping eyes
I slip into a world
Where time has come to a halt
And everything is still

I was in a room that had three walls
All stretching to the sky
The walls didn't have a color
Visible to the eye

On two walls there were windows
On one wall there was a door
At my feet a doormat
Was resting on the floor

It gave no “welcome” greeting
It sent no sweet “goodbye”
The rug gripping my trembling feet
Only made me sigh

The two windows seemed so silent
Until I carefully approached
I quietly reminded myself
That I shouldn't dare encroach

As I look into these windows
The timeline stretches on
There were visions of things to be
And things that were forgone

I looked over my left shoulder
To the window at my side
The glass was tinted as a rose
On the things I saw, I bide

Sights of memories long since past
Flood into my aching mind
Feelings of nostalgia
I’m always trying to find

I liked what I saw so very much
But I was very curious to see
What was in the other one
But when I looked to my right, I saw me

It’s true this was a mirror
But it wasn't what I thought
When I looked at my reflection
I saw all the things I’m not

My age had increased plenty
I seemed rather fat and old
My face was sagging and sluggish
I didn't fit the mold
I wasn't all that happy
This made me feel so grey
This mirror from a fun house
Wasn't meant for play

Well I turned around again to see
The window I had left
To find a blank and empty wall
Now surely this was theft

I looked again back to my right
Into another wall
Of all the feelings in this room
There were none left at all

I panicked for a while thinking
Where am I going to go?
There’s no way to escape from here
Nothing to guide me home

But then a thought so very vague
Crossed my confused mind
I turned around and saw the door
And realized I’d been blind

I gave the **** a quiet rattle
And the door opened with ease
And once again when I looked through
What I saw was me

But this was not like the mirror
That filled my reflection with dread
I saw myself quietly sleeping
In my warm and cozy bed

The windows had disappeared
They were not what they seemed
For it was then I realized
That this was just a dream

Through the door in front of me
Was the me I am right now
This door was the only option
That was to be allowed

So I stepped over the threshold
To be united as one
By my mind and body together
This battle had been won

**I viewed the past as beauty
And looked to the future with fear
But always lived in the present
For that was what was near

staring at the
plain
page

from inside a
muffled
mind

full of my
empty
efforts

wasting all my
ticking
time

drying my pen's
idle
ink

as I sit here
trying to think