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David Bojay Jun 2014
My vision isn't as vivid as before, but I still notice everything.
There's some things that stick to me overtime and my 3rd eye is always open.
My dreams are based on conclusions, on brought to life "what ifs".
I wouldn't say dreams, because I'm afraid to sleep, so I'll call them nightmares.
The first time we slept together, I felt love like I never did.
It wasn't even the ******* causing this confusing feeling.
It was the look in your eyes that made me realize that this was more than just a few love letters.
I haven't felt heavy in a while, my tears don't need sympathy.
My cheeks deserve tides of my tears.
I'm nothing but a lonely star surrounded by tons of other stars that feel like tomorrow will deliberately break barriers in your soul.
im just here, its 9:46 pm and the music on my phone is on shuffle
David Bojay Nov 2017
to think you know someone

until you have them in your bed all figured out

I look into her eyes
(I hope they never lied)

and

see
right
through
her

with nothing to think

and less to say

about how I feel about

(her importance)
David Bojay Jul 2017
out here, within
catch a glimpse
(my tongue on your skin)
thinking of me or thinking of him?
as long as you're pleased, don't matter what you


          (think)
David Bojay Nov 2019
with or without me/
the world will keep change remarkably/
the leaves will sprout and grow into trees gracefully/
And some ******* will later saw it off to build new offices for future graduates that care about the environment when it’s too late/
it’s the pain and joy that bring me closer to life/
it’s experience that separates hope from the all knowing/
you’ll love again/
I’ll sit in my dreadful misery for that time being/
there’s indignity in my temperament/
only you can see through the masks I portray for the mindful and mindless/
the conceptions they throw at me to identify my mannerisms just make me laugh/
Because everything is on purpose/
Played out before I lay it out/
Understand the roles before I play the part/
There’s “freedom” for artists in this world
Inside the heart of imagination that never stops beating/
David Bojay Nov 2019
what happened to reason?/
gone with the wind with every changing season/
the seconds between you realize that moment at ease/
finding my way but I've lose the keys/
deep in the sea, deep in the sea/
is it comfort I seek?/
to break through illusions I create?/
am I just teasing my mind with ideas that easily leave?/
the overlapping conversations between my sensations fill the paper/
they fill the spaces of silence
they might even satisfy the eye/
interactivity in the process
no thought can linger for so long,  a vessel in disguise/
perhaps I'm just a lie, at peace with what I don't like... what happened to reason?/
a reason for this, a reason for that
a reason to fight/
but all that I don't like.... requires judgement/
a thought follows, but I don't/
too many mistakes have been made under this light/
a war to be settled with the untouchable, with a mirror/
there was never a reason to retaliate with my angels and my demons/
David Bojay Oct 2016
SN was sitting away from me
We had gotten into a little argument but I knew things were going back to normal after she left
I can't leave an open wound bleed out
People tell me I overdramatize
I just like to see things from that point of view
Helps me write poems
Like this
To reflect

I haven't written seriously for a while

I don't think it was ever that serious, I just didn't know how to express whatever my mind held inside on to another platform
Now there's YouTube

Everything revolves around you Charlie
I miss you so much my precious girl

White fur white fur
Your house I made makes my mind blur
My throat doesn't think
But I think my brain makes it do something
Not sure what
My eyes begin to rain

Your missing is to blame

Death is only scary when you don't accept

When you don't accept, it will hurt

And I'm still hurt


Because I don't want to accept looking out the window believe you're not ******* THERE

AND I GET HEATED BECAUSE THE DOOR WASNT LOCKED
AND I BLAME MYSELF FOR GOING OUT THAT NIGHT AND NOT DOUBLE CHECKING THE DOOR

AND ITS BEEN 5 MONTHS WHERE THE **** ARE YOU

MY BROTHER IS IN THE OTHER ROOM MINDING HIS OWN
HE HAS IT GOING
HIS MIND IS ELSEWHERE
MY LOVE IS IN HER HOME PLAYING HER DS MAYBE
MY MOM IS PROBABLY PRAYING RIGHT NOW

AND HERE I AM AGAIN THINKING ABOUT YOU

ALWAYS
FOREVER

I LOVE YOU CHARLIE
you are still missing
David Bojay Jun 2014
I might work in construction this summer, and lift heavy things to maintain a one bed apartment payed with labor in what determines your place in society; green paper

I might become a professional cross country runner, and wear my legs out every day to earn a circular carved piece of gold that I'll wear around my neck to feel superior for a few minutes, to feel like I've made an impact, when my own weight can't even make an impact on the concrete I step in with every stride I take, and sweat coming down my face like Pompeii

I might be a druggie to eliminate misery for a number of hours, to crack smiles I don't really feel because the key to my happiness broke in half while trying to open the twelve inch thick steel door in my heart...
So I'm using chemicals to melt away all of the metals in the periodic table that made this door impossible to break down even if I had a positive attitude, and an army throwing grenades at it that won't even leave a scratch on it..

So I'll be sitting next to this door, watching these compounds I took into my helpless body destroy the surroundings that resemble my sadness, and be left alone with an indestructible door, and all that I will want to feel... I wont

I'll become one with numbness, and become a still emotion in a dark place with a big door I will never open...
I'll admire its strength so hopefully my shaky hands can clench, and grow to be as powerful and brave enough to attack as the door defends what I aspire to be..
a human with meaning in showing my teeth and muscles in my face, that are truthfully moving without the help of a substance that deceives my feelings for hours
I might've broken the key, and my fists might be bruised and cracked, but there's no limits to will

But time is digging my grave without me moving a single bone in my body
To be looked back at as a legend that did nothing

I'll be posted on a plaque with my name and spirit in it, on a shaped piece of stone that people will stare at on a sunny day wearing all black while listening to the cries of my mother

"WHY DID HE HAVE TO GO, WHY HIM?"

"WHY GOD, WHY?"

Destiny doesn't exist, neither does coincidence
Time isn't for everyone, but it'll be mine
I won't have to rush to feel "free" from this "freedom" I'm living in
My consciousness will know, when my time is due
So mother, nothing will be your fault
Brother, I don't mind you bashing on me
Sister, I don't get mad when you scream at me for no reason, we all have bad days,
And father, I don't care if you never loved me,
It wont be your fault
Just understand that time gives and takes..
Thats all there is to it...

Time; humans limit to experiences

So now you know why I make bad decisions, now you know why I do certain things.


Now you know to blame time.
David Bojay Nov 2017
black kendrick lamar hoodie
white tall tee
creamy vest
batman sweater with a zipper on the side
grey northface jacket
different (styles)

expressed on a tuesday morning

living in a rainbow

it's good to be a little "rainbow"
David Bojay Jan 2014
She’s so insecure, yet the prettiest girl I know
She walks the halls with her head down when I look up to her
She talks so quiet, I think it’s because she’s afraid guys will far for her beautiful voice
She doesn’t even try to look nice
Her worst days are some girls best days
When she tries, she’s the queen in my mind
She rules my world
If I had the chance, I would take her hand and make her happy
When she says love, she makes it sound believeable
When she cries my world stops
I could think all day about her
But the situation I’m in would not progress
When we text, I have to think
She hides her smile, she shouldn’t
Because I know if she didn’t she could cure a blind person
Such a representation of excellence to me
But here I am doing nothing about it
Again
Im scared she won't believe me
David Bojay Jun 2015
WE'RE SO INCLINED
REALIZE IT
YOU'RE IT
YOU'RE HERE
PUT YOUR PHONE DOWN
BREATHE AND LISTEN
FEEL YOUR SURROUNDINGS
I'M SO PASSIONATE
ABOUT EVERYTHING AROUND
WHAT I CAN FEEL AND CONTROL
THERE'S SO MUCH MORE TO EVERYTHING
YOU ARE YOUR OWN DESTINY IF YOU BELIEVE IN YOURSELF
DON'T BE TRAPPED IN THIS HOLE OF ADVERTISEMENT
THERE'S SO MUCH MORE TO YOUR EXISTENCE I PROMISE
ASK ME WHAT'S ON MY MIND SO WE CAN PROGRESS DON'T BE WEIRDED OUT BY IT
ANSWER ME HONESTLY
TELL ME
BE HONEST WITH ME AND YOURSELF
**** GOES DOWN BUT IT'S SO POSITIVE
IT'S SUCH A LESSON TO LEARN FROM
MOVE FORWARD
DON'T SETTLE
I'M SO INTO EVERYTHING TO BACK DOWN
I CAN'T BE STUCK
APPRECIATE
THIS IS EARTH
WE'RE HER FOR A LITTLE WHILE
BUT FOREVER KEEPS THE VIBE GOING
IF THERE'S NOT A FOREVER WE STOP TRYING
IT'S A BEAUTIFUL DELUSION
LET'S KEEP IT GOING
SPREAD LOVE AND GO WITH WHATEVER YOU BELIEVE IN AND ACHIEVE IT BECAUSE YOU WANT IT SO BAD
I WANT TO BE THE BEST
THE WEIRD IS SO YOU
"WHAT'S ON YOUR ******* MIND?"
IT'S SO SAD HOW PEOPLE THINK IT'S A WEIRD QUESTION
I CARE, I WANT TO LEARN ABOUT YOU TO CHANGE PERSPECTIVE
IT'S BAD THAT I THINK IT'S SAD
BUT THE TRUTH HURTS
YOU ARE NATURE
IT'S ALL AROUND YOU
BE WITHIN YOU
THE WIND AND THE TREES
THIS HAS BEEN HERE FOR SO LONG
ON EARTH
THIS IS OUR HOME
DON'T GLUE YOURSELF TO A SCREEN
GET OUT THERE AND BE ONE WITH WHAT'S BEEN THERE SINCE THE START
David Bojay Apr 2020
Skewed vision when I followed the cynosure//
Beam balancing
Can’t hold my own sometimes//
Made up characters to separate my thoughts from “myself”//
Split my cares in eights//
Off with the indecision//
Fall asleep as soon as the tears hit the pillow//
Head up, delusional//
Unparagoned//
So I think
Perception shields the egomaniac residing in me//
I make it seem as if so, but really with my intentions, I’ll never know how things will play out//
Misterpretating will be my end//
With no one to truly seek, I play with the inconsistencies.... so what about guilt?//
My character doesn’t mind the idiosyncrasies I portray... I do it for the show
Merging with the relentless and the glorious
It ***** to be Sweet, bittersweet//
Pa
David Bojay Jan 2014
Pa
My old man is a good guy
He walks alone, waiting
He has a long sadness
From so much walking I look at him from a distance But we’re so different
He grew up with the century
With streetcars and red wine
Old man, my dear old man
You walk slowly now
As if forgiving the wind I’m your blood, old man I’m your silence and your time
He has sharp eyes
And a heavy build
Old age came upon him suddenly
Without a carnival or celebration
My years are new years, I'm 16
The man’s years are old
He carries his pain inside him
And he has history without time
Old man, my dear old man
You walk slowly now
Old man I’m your silence and your time
Old man, father
I miss you
David Bojay Sep 2019
what happened to reason?//
gone with the wind with every changing season//
the seconds between you realize that moment at ease//
finding my way but I've lose the keys//
deep in the sea, there's no surface to see//
is it comfort I seek? //
am I just teasing my mind with ideas that easily flee//
the overlapping conversations between my sensations fill the paper//
they fill the spaces of silence//
they might even satisfy the eye//
interactivity in the process//
no thought can linger for so long, a vessel in disguise//
perhaps I'm just a lie, at peace with what I don't like... what happened to reason?//
a reason for this, a reason for that//
a reason to fight//
but all that I don't like.... requires judgement//
a thought follows, but I can't//
too many mistakes have been made under this light//
a war to be settled with the untouchable, with a mirror//
there was never a reason to retaliate//
David Bojay Nov 2017
feel every step you take

see everywhere you look

pay mind to your mind

because to be mindless is worthless

and in life

everything has a price

be aware of your awareness

b
r
e
a
t
h
e

nothing has to be a mess

the moment is clear
David Bojay Jan 2019
There is no hope in the “fixations”
This moment is eternal
The “problems” vanish when there is no future or past
The filter limits my mind
How many ways are there to get to the other side of the madness derived from perceptions

When I don’t care
Would it be fair?


My eyes can’t be everywhere
Neither can my mind

Here and aware
Not there
No control
Beyond the lenses that filter

The nonexistent past and future bother my mind sometimes
David Bojay May 2014
“Dear Lord, I know I am the angel you most regret.
Forgive me for my misunderstood intentions.
Forgive me for the drugs I take in just to be right beneath your feet.
Forgive me for the sins I commit without regretting them.
Forgive me if I’m not a strong enough soldier to defend your word when unbelievers bash on your greatness.
Forgive me.”


**stands up and wipes the dirt off his prickly knees
random
David Bojay Jun 2014
does your weight make an impact on the your galaga patterned carpet?
do letters really give your experiences justice?
do cameras really capture moments you'll never see again
they cant capture the feeling you were feeling what's seeing to a feeling?
a visual memory to limited words? limited meaning? limited energy?
what is emotion in a passion? describing motives from your soul into motions?
what is purpose?
what's an answer to a question?
common sense?
whats common sense?
limited senses?
i cant think right now.
questions
David Bojay Jan 2014
what if my skin was really yellow but the vision of your mind is telling you it’s brown and you’re convinced to think it’s brown, what if your lover really didnt love you, what if dinosaurs are still alive… would you want one as your pet? words are very strong, but it also depends how you see them as…. what if “talking ****” was an honest opinion? is there such thing as a perfect error? so many poems to write, i just can’t gather all my thoughts in one so i scatter them out and write one small one. all the yip yap people say is really annoying but it’s a subject of matter you have to deal with, i wake up anew, and do my do’s, through the pain, i’ll always say the truth.. it’s not about it being about me it’s about me doing what the right thing is. life is a religion, and misunderstood art. the poets are the preachers, the words are the scriptures, many things are jejune, that’s why we don’t keep up with it. so much creativity keeping me stable, and writings. the feelings of expression and people being amazed by it is significant, all of the creativity, it’s allowing us to make mistakes, art is knowing which ones to keep. music, is really complex if you really look behind the meaning. simple if you just listen. i’m a curious person, curious about my mind because it’s capable of so much and controls so much, controls your style and taste levels that determine you, at time you’ll feel useless to the world, but then i realize how many lives i’ve impacted. i’m just passionate about different subject, i can’t really explain it all in words, more i’d like to show people. just to show off and to be looked up to, but then again, well die and rot and 10 years from that you’ll be 1 of billions that died… that simple. i suffer from hubris, tons of it, it’d be hard to understand, yet it’d be understandable if you were me. many people have it, but are ******* to show they’re significance, i go to school to learn fuckery, but i already know what i want to know thanks to the little scenarios i go through on a daily bases. i just can’t stand the fact that people always have to look on the negative side, why can’t they just sit back and look at life like i do and admire. greater things come ahead. what if i was the next ******, a loving kind who loved his people. who knows, so many unanswered questions that will never be answered. artistic visions that will never be shown. **** hate, yet so much violence. a lot of love, but much ***. i dont ******* know, just a little thought, got a little lost in the moment. peace. love. "happiness"
David Bojay Jan 2019
Own up to what’s been

Forgive the sins that made the day a dim place in the distance

Princess to a reference, I just play with what could be

Persevere through the steers

Find beauty in the tears

Time passes and all that matters is here

Eyes pealed
Lips sealed
Disregarding my feels
What’s really real?
In the moment I heal

Finally

But whatever.... endeavors flowing out the river

Understood the way I was

Narcissistic

Reading on how to be “that” guy

To realize something that was detrimental to my relationships

My ******* tendencies

To realize you’ve only seen glimpses of me.... pardon my “self”
David Bojay Jul 2014
I'm on the bus going to the airport, the view's pretty cool.
My mind looks like a writers paper when they have writers block.
I'm not scared of much anymore, just faces in my heart turning into gaps.
I'm waiting for a spark of creativity but I can't seem to light anything right now.
I feel like an empty lighter waiting for a miracle to happen, hoping to light a nicotines addict cigarette.
I wonder why time tends to fast forward when I finally realize and cherish.
The plane ride is going to be a *****.
Not the one with big ***** at least .
Nothing a ***** boy can get.
David Bojay Mar 2014
my father used to play the guitar and my mother got tricked into delivering drugs to the u.s.a
im confused from who im destined to be, i doubt I'll inherit anything
so far both of my parents think im weird
i guess its the way i sit in my backyard, and paint the sky with hand motions,  
i guess its the way i lock myself in my room because company distracts me
i guess its the way they conceive my actions as,
i guess its because i never tell them where i go when im out for 3-5 hours on my bike              
i guess its because i like to spend all night awake just to have alone time
its funny how my parents haven't noticed i do such things, to make them proud
are my paintings a little too colorful for your vision?
is my form of writing a little too misunderstanding?
or are you just not as open minded to things
i look back at both of your pasts and feel misery
hoping your child will make you happy
mother, father, you've created a regretful blessing
mother, father, you've created a so called scumbag artist who only cares in pleasing people and his cannabis strands
mother, father, your son is sick of being called crazy at home
mother, father, your son can't tell both of you anything without being judged
mother, father protect me from the kids at school who call me weird, the wound is deep enough
David Bojay Dec 2018
Kiss....me one more time
And maybe once again
And after that once more
Maybe then you’ll say
And I’ll finally behave
Man I never knew
that one day I’ll be begging you to stay
Wish you believed me when I said
That I’ll never be the same
I guess I have to accept this change
And go a little bit insane
It’s okay my dear
You did what you had to do
Either way I’ll wait for you
Even though it was me
That caused this entire mess
I will never forget
Who you were and what we did
Because all that’s said and done
Taught me to simply be
Even though it’s hard
to live through this pain
Must remain aware
of the **** that makes me dare
to end it like I never cared
David Bojay Apr 2019
indulging in something yet to come
wasting “time”
even if it doesn’t exist
it’s so persistent
barriers “I” can’t scale
like water through the cracks
Like the atoms intertwined in everything
the storm has settled
there’s stories to tell
Fragments to share
Bring it into existence without any hope
Art isn’t meant for you to cope
She
David Bojay Mar 2014
She
theres a possibility her emotions are reflections of the city lights she loves so much
the music she listens to is contradictory to what she listens to without headphones
through crowded streets, she just wants to hear someone tell her to not give up with a guitar lead behind that voice
she loves coffee because she's sick of despite
she sweetens up her bitter self with caffè americano
there's a slight chance that being in love at a young could be true and pure
not under my silk sheets for that matter though
she lays her head on pillows that feel like her breast on which I lay my head on
they say the body likes the warmth of sheets in the blistering cold mornings while waking up
when really the sheets cant stand her body not being wrapped in them
i think its safe to say that shes the atmosphere in my world that keeps the bad things from breaking in my broken nice gestures
i think without precaution i can say that ******* is the weakest of addictions in my world that shes in
and her voice I love to listen to is are injections that cure from things I dont want to hear
the taste of her lips take away my dehydrated mouth with taste that fills my buds and fills my heartless body with hearty hearts
David Bojay Feb 2015
Fluid loving
Intellectual touches to my ego makes me feel safe
These faces are similiar and my is mood levitating in the cosmos full of misery
The dreams I've been diving in have been hallucinations of my twisted universe
I wrote a eulogy of a person who made me suffer most
Oneness with the universe, I'm one with you baby girl I still think you're all that's worth
Lost in the prisms
Walking in natures holographic reality
Getting through with this spirit that helps me feel real to deal with these feelings I get when I'm missing you
Wasted love like unfinished letters to my old girl
Like how did we fall out?
Playing some John Lennon to convert tears into melodies
Acidic skies, many why's
The answer to the questions are neither truth or lies so I'll keep reticent and keep my 2 cents
David Bojay Jun 2015
These girlies aint real
Claim they fufilled only when they on the pills
Claim they got it but they missin some bills
Claim they higha when they on some loud
But when they confront all you hear is them meows
**** is you saying
Ain't gotta slang to show you my deal
Don't **** with these cons
I'm shooting these names
These girlies is talk like you run up just for the bronze
Play you in a room full of ******* and all you hear is the yawns
I swear I see you dudes when I mowing my lawns
Snakes in my backyard like you committing a fraud
**** outta here with the weak **** I'm sick of ya bars
i’ll eat you ******* and yall multiply so i’ll never starve
have my heart in my sleeve
you wookies got ya hearts in ya cars
possessions all you living the norm
i bet that **** is corn, you say you cold but you straight looking for warmth
throwing these shots like if these bullets were thoughts
king of these clowns they aint ever been down
you know they cats when they hear me coming they bounce
you know they cats when they shoot me through fake accounts
you know they cats when **** up the deala for the ounce
you know they cats when they roll deep in the city and aint claiming they ground
they flossin what they wish they had, i hear you want them discounts
like whats up your talk?
you just lost and found and soon to be shot with em rounds
with these words so i would back down
im with the funnies so im the clown of this town
David Bojay Jan 2014
I wish I was 18
It'll be officially legal to **** myself slowly, thank God for cigarettes
I am the bad thought that does your son good
I am the regret that does your daughter good
We feel right, doing what pleases
It doesnt look like we can lose
Our intensions will never lose
And I'll probably go hell... bauptized
I just finished showering, but my soul is as ***** as a *******
As ***** as your girlfriend, as ***** as your mom
It's 10:23 pm, and I'm confused between a poem I cant write and a poem I'm writing
I dont know where I'll end up
I don't know much
Much of anything
Anything of nothing
I don't know nothing
The only thing I know is that I'll do good to worms when I'm beneath the ground and they're hungry
David Bojay Jul 2017
silent dreams

trying to be lived while doing physics homework

constantly questioning whether or not I should do it

trying to build something from work ethic

but (slowly eating me away with each assignment)

i'll do it though



so I can try and fit in to let loose (within)
David Bojay Jan 2015
My liver is slowly dying
It's a sign to quit but I don't think I should
Drafts are reminders of what you are to me
I shouldn't let go of what I lived for
I'm fading into my patience
Red grains, red grains, yeahg
I'm all in for the energy
It is happening again, again, again
12:08 and it is happening again
7/11 for the protein, weird huh? Yeahhhh
My friends for the comfort
My mind for the **** of it
Seriously happening again
Dimensions for us again, yeahhh
Are we connected or are social media?
Visions for the blind, you and I
Music for the deaf, love is loud
God for the hopeless so they'll feel even more hopeless after
LET GO LET GO YEAHHHH
We are drowning, we have to learn to swim
Dancing like I'm possessed in my room
Dancing so gay, so happy, so smoothly
I'm having *** with the air
I'm making out with the random
I bet my mom feels weird telling me "God bless"
I am happening again, yeahhhh
Yeahhh
David Bojay Mar 2014
The whips to our backs are mental scars
Not much of physical scars
Scars can rub off easily, bad memories stay with you
They haunt you
Freedom is given to what society thinks is justified to our world
The world of diversity, somewhat we're trapped in a cage being tortured by our own kind of malignant people
We're free from freedom, and our knees are ashy from the ground we kneel in
Our bodies are burning, the sun has polluted our bodies with sweat, its affecting the way we think
We do not belong here
We're supposed to be free, free from slavery, not free from freedom
Our scars on our backs are chants
Chants that one day will be heard
And we'll walk the streets with confidence
We'll triumph together as one
My fellow brothers and sisters
We will be free
sln
David Bojay Jan 2017
sln
How do I seek truth when I can't see beyond the moon
How do I wonder so far when I can touch my head
Inside I wonder with no disguise
Because I don't fear what comes in my day
Accepted a wound to the heart, so I could accept pain everyday
Losing you, like vapor coming from the pax
There you lie, without the soul

Can't even blow
David Bojay Jul 2014
got poetry to show to my friends but im thinking of deleting my twitter
my thoughts aren't as cool as I wish they could be, so bookmark my HP page for the updates
the summer is chillin and im going places my mom doesn't want me to go to
just because a place brings back bad memories doesn't mean I shouldn't be there
Im past all of the stupidness and accepted my foolishness, no need for the reminders my ego is drowning
my link on my insta no need for tweeting my emotions my tumblr is boring but so are your hobbies
im writing for some dollars for more pencils, im running out of them
i got some money but thats for anything that comes coincidently coincidence
no need for some pens because I cant erase mistakes with them
nhom site under construction so give us a few weekends our weeks are productive we hustle until we get it **** what you're doing
there isn't any way but the need way so excuse your missing bikes, we're 16 and we're foolin
we order pizza and write down ideas no time for galleria
we ride for adventure on two weels
interacting for promo no need for hiding behind some screens
my life is a run on but thats how it should be no time for breaks, sleep is an option lead is necessary
rooftops capture sentences paintings illustrate our visions
if you dont contact me then why should I
I should be humble but my account has 4 zeros, my mom dont trust me with it so I dont know the pasword
That child support is piling up, I dont really care
got miles on miles on miles on miles on miles ridden on my bike but I haven't gone anywhere but the city
Im aiming for the carpet so when we go back to school I'm bringing my summer
Got numbers as options but there's no reason to hit them up, got a good one I'm grateful
I'm riding fast my way don't slow me down, is this a comeup? I don't know I'm just going along
Come up from suburbs, I want to live high until my view is the moutains
Im from Dallas but that don't mean nothing, no city defining where I'm going because I was on the 26th floor when I was at my lowest and I wasn't even on coke
these days my grind is so lowkey, im sleep deprived
my paint never dries, my brushes are always getting washed but these projects aren't for the public
I only have a few questions, is love really real? should I sleep more?
i dont know but Monarch dr is gonna be in a book one day
wrote this while my mom was screaming at me
David Bojay May 2014
trouble in the city
no loyalty in your vision
trouble in your mind
no passion in movement

pull the trigger if your life isn't your home
pull the trigger if your home is in someone's heart
if they drop it, lose your feelings

i climbed up the mountains and I havent yet found reason in seasons

dont look for me in your purse like the grief in your heart

gold days are deceiving

and black clouds are refreshing

I've never felt this way about anything significant other than a drawing I still have since I was in 1st grade


I've lost a few feelings along the years

I'll never feel the same
ehh
David Bojay Nov 2018
a bed awaiting my death
remembering moments better left unthought
if it’s for the better, i won't call to say I love you
growing fond of letting go
it's so easy it hurts
without opening my third
it simply has been
the wine consumed
makes it easier to accept my doom
go your way
mine has been betrayed
broken promises
the moments pass
the liquor is still being consumed
the end
is all we live for
every moment flashes
it flashes
it flashes
the run
towards a light unseen
a darkness so keen
David Bojay Aug 2017
away, last night
in the deep blue of serendipity
trying to find
divine light beyond my fright in spite of the terrors in my mind
pursuing my way out the blue
questioning my faith because I never had a clue
swept my shoes away and through the hues of modern sadness
depicting expression with color
red and blue, we only have each other
looking in the mirror
(find my way out of my eyes)
outside with nothing to view
in the zoo with no one but you, wild when it's only us two
find you on my lap when I'm sitting obtuse
gassed up like if I was a Jew
David Bojay Feb 2014
Years will pass, and I will become a man
I've always thought of you as a woman
Your sophistication as a person amused me so much I could study you all day and not learn anything but the love that has always been there
Every step you took, was a line of beautiful poetry
Your life is an endless poem, and everything you did for me dug a whole in my heart and filled it with care and made me feel silly
You were the drug I didn't want to let go of
I didn't care if you made me go crazy, because it was a good kind of crazy
The kind of crazy you're proud to be
The kind of crazy that people envied
I don't remember much when I'm touching Gods feet
But I do remember when I used to call you and I used to talk about the stupidest things
My eyes were red, and everything in my room was blurry, but the sound of your voice made everything so simple, clear, and it soothed the ground I was stepping on
You made my Saturdays worth dressing up and cleaning my room to impress you
My mother told me you were the most joyful person she has ever met, I guess she saw the happiness you brought to my house
When you came over, you made my environment feel like a home
I always thought my room was missing something, now I know it was your laugh and love that filled up the rest of my room
You gave me house a Christmas feeling, I really don't know how those feelings are, but I read on the internet that it those type of feelings make you feel happy
I guess you were my Christmas feeling, I'm sure of it
The way you sat on my bed, the way you laughed at me acting like a fool
You're the poem I'll never get tired of reading
You're the movie I'll never get tired of watching
You're the TV show I'll keep up with every series
You're the social network I'll be addicted to
You're the lips I'd love to kiss every morning
You're the person I want to bring orange juice to when we wake up
People asked me why I let you go, the truth is I'm more of a giving person
Honesty is pain, but someone was dying, and I had to save them
I didn't care If I lost everything, I just wanted her to be happy because I knew we'd be together someday
I'm overjoyed at the thought that she's happy for accepting who she really was
I'm overjoyed that you have someone now
If receiving meant being alone in terms of being with somebody
I don't care
I see both of you smiling in the hallways, and It's fine
I'm more of a giving person like I said
It's 10 pm, and I don't think I'm getting any sleep today
I've been meaning to write this for a while
I can't tell you this in person, neither can I text you it
So I write to the people who scroll down on this website to see peoples vents and forms of expression through the art of writing
I miss you, and I love you.
David Bojay Jan 2014
I will be depressed tonight, and tomorrow
I hate only having split seconds of happiness when I kiss you before I go to class
I wish I could kiss you forever
I wish I could kiss you hello instead of goodbye
I wish I could kiss you when the clock clicks goodnight
I wish I could kiss you when the sun is beginning to show on cold mornings where your kisses are the only seconds that can make me warm
Train rides are really boring without music
I like to play indie chill music while riding
I'd rather hear you whisper in my ear how much you love taking pictures of the city we live in
I really hope we do as we say
On gloomy days, your kisses will make me happy
The day I'm dead
Your kisses will bring me to life
Just a few more seconds alive, enough to enjoy one last kiss of happiness
David Bojay Jul 2014
I reached 25K views on this website
More than I expected since the beginning
I didn't intend anything with anything by all means
I didn't intend to feel so careless these days
I didn't intend to reach this point with driving in a straight road passing stop signs
The stars don't seem so far away, but they are
My reach isn't so far, but I'll manage
This isn't about the views, this is about sadness and happiness being told in stories on paper
This isn't about likes, this is about sunshines and turning off the light before I go to sleep
I haven't watched tv in awhile, and I tend to get off topic these days so much, there's so much on my chest
Just know that the petition I signed about staying drug free doesn't mean a thing to me
From knowing there's secret forces controlling us from knowing you can only **** yourself to get out of it
There really isn't much to do but to suit myself with my scattered thoughts
Lovers can't really tell that faces change and feelings are the same, there's no one to blame but insecurity in this game
And if I can stay in your mind, everything else isn't anything to me, I'll be blind to anything that isn't you
David Bojay Sep 2021
the realm of illusion
not much more illusory than in the physical world
extreme unreliability
impression by the unseen seer
changing forms
glamour
an object seen as it were from all sides at once
the inside as if the outside
inadequate language
frequent reversal
astral light
139
as 931 and so on
capable masters
great hurry and carelessness
all possible forms of illusion
how do i deal with phenomenons like this
few words are needed
death is easier to face than to try and wrap my head around (life)
it's not about seeing correctly, but translating what is being seen
trying to carry my consciousness without it breaking
from physical to astral... and back
possibility of recollections could partially be lost or distorted in the blank interval
experiencing between breaths
the root of this moment to the next
the inevitable now
spirits unfortunately dormant
we'll soon build up the courage
David Bojay Mar 2019
5:33
my attempt to sleep
wandering in the deep
blue see where I weep
speculation from beneath

instances to approach
heat of the moment
like fingers on a stove
until the end like I’m holding a roach
burning until it’s something I loathe



nobody completes you but it sure did “feel” that way
Ways around the mind to see through the lenses

waking up from dreams I thought I’d never wake up from
new beginnings to become
someone who overcomes the struggles instead of feeling glum
Dumb
Dude... rather skim through what’s really worth with the bottom of my thumb


(irememberthedayuleftlikeitwasyesterdayonlytodayiacceptitalitt­lemorethough)
David Bojay Feb 2014
Wake up and smell your mothers pancakes on a Sunday morning before church while your dad is watching cartoons wanting to be a kid again
The childhood he never had is on tv
The food his mother could never afford is on the pan cooking
You wake up and hear the hope birds sing while you inhale the scentless air
Stepping inside; your sister greets you with a hug
Knowing she doesn't mean them, you smile anyways
On the way to church the thoughts of provoking ****** things come up while the bible is on your lap
The bible slowly starts to rise
What am I?
What are you?
What is your purpose?
You stare at the priest with such questionable doubt
Is he lying to me?
You walk out of church with tears rolling down your eyes and suddenly realize you're in a dream, and you have to wake up soon because the questions you're asking  yourself are hurting you
You take the train to the city
Listen to the birds for the last time, take the elevator to the highest floor of your favorite building and throw away your body to the empty air that feels like a million swords stabbing you as you're going down quickly
Your eyes open, and gold gates are opening
Hell is deceiving, you'll die a million more times tonight
I'm alive
David Bojay Sep 2021
there's no reason to remember about what I've desired
just like I forgot about the desire to write
I've allowed myself the freedom to do
(when I want) (focus when it comes)
it's what feels to be, spiritual progress
radiant feelings
coming and fleeting
thought forms melting before all I'm seeing
attitude is vibration
the root of creation
divine formation
through useless information
making sense without mystical procedures
wasted leisure
(false ambitions deriving from unnatural greed)
open myself to persecution
only to realize I my"self" am an illusion
so it begins, the dissolution
calm and ready
secluded in the mysteries of this great theatre
life, a series of memories arranged in the practical
harmonical manner
(if that's a word)
(keep typing)
what do I live for?
a production of symbolism
entertained in the prisms
that so happen to reflect human mischief
live to diminish
built up anguish
a hopeless wish
meaningless stitch
can't manage the baggage
inside the cerebral attic
static between breaths
the moment I'll let
settle in the sun that meant to set
(a wedding in the sky)
lost love so divine
tears rushing down my cheeks at night
reflecting on universal signs
eternal truths
3.14
pie
I sigh
a moment at a time
you can't change, only modify
generous time flies
realizations combined
directions for decisions in mind
(this life)
incline, decline
experiences desgined
in
curves, opposing straight lines
how would we even define....
what truly aligns
the spirit
continue, live like there's no finish
vulnerable
characters to diminish
predict my wishes
my heart
longing for what isn't
what was
no longer there
couldn't stare at what I couldn't bare
missed true love by plenty hairs
mistakes were obvious
I was oblivious
thinking of what could've been
again
Limited trains of thought
All I used to sought for, cost a lot
it was you, who inspired some tunes
formed by the formless wind that creates the dunes
Inevitable doom
Saudade
Under the moon
I succumb to you
act upon intentions and responses
perhaps it's way too soon
flowers yet to bloom
ideas flowing out the womb
mistakes to broom
room to improve
a struggle before you wake
less and less to rake
In and out of fantasies
can't trust in (reality)
question my sanity
study my anatomy
Zoom passed meaningless blues
I’m on my walk...
I feel better now
examine the highs before I drown again
calculate the vitamins
narratives written with my fancy stolen pen
this is.... idk
David Bojay Feb 2014
my mother once told me happiness isn't realized
I guess that's why I never seem to catch myself cherish it
When I was 7 I made out with my sisters bestfriend
I had no idea what I was doing
What I did know is that I was sinning
I knew that I was doing something rated R according to the movies
I sin a lot, but I sin because if I dont, Jesus Christ died for no reason
It's only fair
Sometimes im riding my bike and spit ahead of me and catch it again while riding
Sometimes I eat cold pizza, almost frozen
Sometimes I look at girls and feel nauseous
Sometimes I want to die, sometimes I want to live
Sometimes I remember, sometimes I smoke ****
Sometimes I wear shorts in the cold, sometimes I wear sweaters in the hot
Sometimes I cry, sometimes I laugh a lot
Sometimes I open doors for old people, sometimes I egg their cars
This is not suitable for anyone
This is garbage
This is a waste
I'm going to respond to that text I just got
Sleep well
And dont ******* too much
Love you
tbh
David Bojay Jun 2018
tbh
sabrina has her cartoons on
i keep pouring my drink
my phone is off
my laptop is fully charged
these moments are being recorded
the steak is cooking
my mom is sleeping
i miss listening to her sleep when i kiss her goodnight

i wake up to the sound of nothing
i turn around and look at sabrina
i look at the ceiling and contemplate the day
i walk to the restroom, the mirror tells the outcome

i live the day, and cook for sabrina

my darling

i'll satisfy your stomach

and your mind

my darling

you're watching cartoons

i love you dearly

this moment, until my body shuts down
David Bojay Feb 2014
The oxygen of trees give life to my lungs
But also confuse them
Trees can give and take
The strong branches can swing your body around when a rope is tied around your neck
The shade their hundreds of leaves give me dry my sweat after a long bike ride
I wonder how many cigarettes I've ashed on trees, I hope they dont hurt them
I am most grateful you're there instead of ashing if on my neck when I'm feeling down
I am most grateful you're there when I'm tired of hitting flat surfaces with mt fists
I am most grateful you were too high to climb when I wanted to hang myself that sunny morning
I'm grateful you made me smile when I was 6 at my grandmas house in Mexico, the tire they roped to you and pushed me in made me most relaxed
I didn't have much to worry about, but you took away the little of sadness I had
Thanks for listening to me cry when I ran to the park and sat and leaned by you after my dad hit my mom
You've swung so many bodies
For laughter
For a visit to the room of judgement
For accidents
Ode to you
For giving and taking
You've done both for me, I wished you weren't so hard to climb
But thanks to the altitude, I'm here
Breathing to what you give me
David Bojay Feb 2014
the morning calls
and its waiting for your answer
sleep ignores the rings
the birds sing for you to wake up
the worlds rotation stops
your pillow holds your head closer
your mom doesnt know what to do
the cars on the streets stop
the stop light stays on red
your mom's is questioning Gods graciousness if its destiny for you to sleep forever
she holds you close, and her tears fill the room with emotion that's contradictory to smiling
her tea starts to boil, she doesnt care
she holds you close
everything that made you is still
your moms hours are running fast because the pain stills cherishment
and all the pretty faces you've encountered throughout your whole life are the ones looking at the stone you're under
and all the bad mouths regret how they used to tease your way with words
your school announces your death and the silence around the school is a reflection of how you used to be in class
and your soul shouts freedom in the sky
your carved name on the stone you're under is a sign of victory and the end of bleeding ears
David Bojay Mar 2014
Boy: "Dad i think I'd rather take the bus today, I don't feel like walking, can you pack my lunch right now as I get ready?"
     (Boy goes into room in a stomping movement)
     (Dad starts preparing lunch)
Dad: "Are you staying for tutorials today? Your grades dont look so good, and it's starting to reflect how you're acting at home.
You're always so lazy now."
Boy: "I'm not sure if I want to stay for tutorials, I'd rather go to sleep afterschool.
School is tiring.
I'll be home later than usual though."
     (Boy starts walking towards the door and checks his pockets for money)
Dad: "Okay, well be safe, where are you going afterschool?"
     (Boy turns around)
Boy: "I was about to tell you, I need 40$ for a fieldtrip today, sorry for the late reminder."
Dad" You should've told me earlier, I'll go upstairs and see what I have in my wallet."
     (Dad goes up the stairs rapidly)


There's times where lying creates curiosity in a mans heart, and wonder if the liar is really telling the truth.
Although they know, they dont want to say anything, they'd rather trust.
Sometimes I lie, sometimes can be all the time for some people.


     (rapid steps going down the stairs)

Dad: "Here we go, $40... What time do I pick you up from school?"
Boy: "Around 7:30 pm."
Dad: "Alright, I'll be there.
Hurry out, you're going to miss your bus."
     (Dad grabs boys head, and kisses his forehead)
"I love you son."
     (Guilt glows in the boys eyes)

Boy: "I love you too dad..."

     (walks away slowly not wanting to admit his lie)


     (boy walks into school)
     (greets his friends)

Boy: "Aye, Matthew, you still down for afterschool? I got the $40, my stupid dad actually bought that I was going to a fieldtrip, we have until 7 to get back."

Matthew: "Dude you dont feel guilty? Not even I would lie to my dad face to face."
     (Both laugh)
Boy: " Is your friend still hooking it up with the *****?"
Matthew: "Yeah, he's coming along with us, I hope you brought a jacket, it's going to get cold tonight."
Boy: "I did, dude I'm nervous, what if we get caught."

People have instincts on whether or not they committed something bad, the boy knew he had committed something bad, something he knew he'd regret at the bottom of his heart.
The trust in his fathers eyes killed him the second he went out the door towards his bus stop.

Matthew: "Trust me we wont, give me the $40 right now and I'll get us two grams of white widow, or do you want OG kush?"
Boy: "White widow, I was reading it has "cooler" effects when you're high."
Matthew: (laughs) "You're lame for looking it up, either way thats very true."

     (Both kids walk different directions at the intersection of the hallway)

Boy: "Alright, well I'll see you afterschool by the lunchroom vending machines."
Matthew: "Alright, I'll see you there...
And dude, don't worry, we'll be fine."

     Throughout the whole day the boy was anxious about what was going to happen afterschool, they didn't really plan anything, they just wanted a good time with marijuana and liquor.
Sometimes when I'm smoking I think if its really worth it, then I remember I'm sad for the moment, and these herbs I'm puffing on will make me smile for a few hours.

     (Boy sees Matthew from a distance and yells his name out)

Matthew: "Aye, I was just looking for you, we going? My friends waiting outside."
Boy: "Hell yeah I'm ready" (he answered with slight tone of worry)
Matthew: "Alright let's go, I've been waiting all day for this."
Boy: "Same here."


     (Both walk up to a black car by the side of the school)

Matthew: "Jesus! How've you been? This is my friend, he's going on an adventure with us today, he bought us some widow."
Jesus: (greets himself to boy, and unlocks the car doors)
I've been good man, just hanging out, work is going slow though. Nobody wants to get tattoos right now, maybe after graduation.
I'm so glad I dont have to deal with school anynore though, my mom always ******* at me for dropping out."

I dont think school can make or break your value as a human. I feel like whatever you love, is enough to pursue. I dont think can school can define intelligence. I feel like self perception of value is so low. I feel like people that love you will always tell you your value is higher than what you think it is.

Matthew: "****, mothers can be a hassle, atleast you love what you're doing now."
Jesus: (Looks at the boy) "What about your mom, what does she get on to you for?"
Boy: (looks down) "My mom died in a car crash... she was intoxicated, and didn't stop at the red light, and an 18 wheeler slammed right where she was sitting; the driver seat..."
    
     long silence
Jesus: "Sorry to hear that bro, I wouldn't have asked if I didn't know."
Boy: "It's fine, we should get going now, there's cars behind us and we're causing traffic."
     (drive off)

The boys vibe was killed by remembering the thought of his mom dying.
He asked Matthew to roll up a blunt, he was starting to get sad.
All of them took hits from the blunt, and soon they were touching Gods feet, and laughing so much.

Sometimes when you remember something you dont want to remember, you do things that can put your pain to ease and convince yourself that you're happy. Little lies.
Little lies to make you smile.
Little lies to make you feel relieved.
Little lies to be accepted.
Little lies.

Jesus: "Hey guys, I'm pretty ******* high, lets go somewhere and relax, I know this place where you can look at the whole city from a cliff.
You guys want to go?"
     (both nod yes)


     car pulls up at a cliff
Boy: "Dude this place looks amazing, how'd you find out about this place?"
Jesus: "I was wandering the woods and found it, amazing right?"
Boy: "Hell yeah, the view is great."
Matthew: "Will you guys accompany me to a beer or what?"
     Both smile and start drinking heavily

The boys didn't notice, but they were intoxicated, and higher than the Empire State Building.
Before they knew it, they were in tears expressing everything they wished people knew about them.


Sometimes your consciousness explodes when your body is let go from reality.
Emotions flow like waterfalls, fast and carelessly.
Unspoken feelings are yelled into the oblivion.


It's 7.

Boy: "*******, guys I need to get back to school, and if my dad finds out I'm drunk and ****** he's going to **** me!"
Jesus: "Keep your calm, here take a hit from this."
Boy:" Dude no, I have to go, drive me back."
Jesus: "Fine, Matthew can you drive? I'm too, well you know."
Matthew: "Sure."


All three were sharing laughs on the way back, and telling eachother which girl they wanted to **** from school. Matthew was sharing his roadtrip idea he had for the summer, and Jesus was saying how much **** he'd buy for the trip.
All three were excited, because they knew they had each other.
They were each made from different backgrounds, but they became the same when they smoked and got drunk.

Boy: "Matthew look at my eyes, they look red as ****, look at them!"

(Mathew turns around)
Matthew: "Hahahaha, dude they're so red, we need to buy you some eye drops."

(Matthew accelerates still looking at the boy)

Tire squeals were heard from a distance, but kept getting closer.
(Matthew immediately turns around)


He tries to brake, but it's too late.
His reaction was too slow, his vision was blurry, and didn't know where to turn.

Ambulances covered Jesus's face while on the bed he was lying on.
Matthews face was unrecognizable.
The boy had lost his legs, and half of his head of missing,
His brains was splattered all over the winshield.


Later on, when the dad found out his only son had died, the week after the incident, he hanged himself in his livingroom.
You know, it's crazy how a lie can take away future plans and expectations.
Plans erased.
Expectations like they never existed.
People's footsteps on earth, like if they never stepped on it.


My mom used to tell me it's wasn't good to lie.
I didn't believe it, lying had brought me a long way when I was a child.
I never knew I was going to suffer consequences 5 months ago, when I was suicidal because I was depressed.
I guess every lie I said came back as big drops of sadness raining in my heart.
I guess it's better to feel pain in truth; in the present,
than to feel pain in the future because of something you could've avoided with honesty.
In the end, it all catches up to you.
David Bojay Nov 2017
In and out the forest//
To confess I need to reflect//
Storage in my dome//
Recollecting for a poem//
Have to think out what's important//
Broken like a door hinge/
Hanging from the cliff ends//
Envisioned in memory lane//
Before I focused on the present, living in vain//
Never knowing if myself I'll forgive//
From seeing beyond this suspenseful grid//
To experience and reflect is what I did//
Lying to the mirror, so what if you're a little weirder//
Beyond self-identification, but people are people and judge the surface//
My soul was stolen from a belief that didn't help me see beyond accepting eternity without fear and uncertainty//
Accepted death, in my "eternal" sleep I'll be awake in contemplate//
Experiencing the essence in the present just makes sense//
(walking around Walmart, typing and typing)
Hoping gave me grief//
When I reached within and confronted "myself" is when I was finally at ease//
It's a movie and I'll lead//
I wish, that you could see, through these letters put together, so that we can just "be"//
David Bojay Jan 2014
Tiresome, both rowing the boat with much force, never knowing how long it take for them to reach the shore, she made a mildly funny statement, “our tears have probably increased the amount of water in the ocean..”. It’s been 4 months since they've been lost in the ocean, in the middle of nowhere. They’d stare at the blue skies daily, hungry? Yes, when both of their stomachs growled they glanced at each other and said, “Love requires you and I, not money, nor food, not anything, just you and I, you being here to experience my pain and happiness is more than enough”. Everything in the world could be reducible, but their love was infinite, they could never understand what love was, nor did they ever want to. Sunsets were still so beautiful, morning stretches were still required, and they were tense less because they never wanted to feel crunched and moody. Good nights were still vital; kisses were still heavenly, rich in thoughts, always tranquil, hardly any infliction. They needed no therapist, the sky was always there to hear their loudest cries, they needed no music, the waves crashing kept them sane, and when they were silent they’d listen to each other breathe. They did nothing but enjoy their company, smiling at each other is what they did mostly, they didn't know what being hopeless was, they were each other’s hope. Night skies consisted of shooting stars, they only wishes for another day to live and survive with each other because that’s all they ever needed. They’d come up with little stories for entertainment, laughter was never absent. Sometimes thoughts are better spoken than written, that’s how it was for them. They didn't have to read each other, a glance into each other’s eyes unlocked their thoughts and desires, both consisted of one another, they never knew when they’d reach shore, but what did know was that they were born to die in each other’s arms, whether in the ocean, or somewhere in a mountain range. Night came, the sky was filled with stars, and he thought stars were a reflection of her glistening eyes he often lost himself in. He awoke one morning hungry as usual, but still smiled because he knew he was about to look into the eyes of his love. He thought he had become blind, because she was nowhere in sight, panic ran through his veins, his bones weakened. He yelled and yelled at the sky, at God, asking where did he take her, why did he take her, why would he take his only happiness, the questioning became severe he couldn't find the words he was trying to say, and his beliefs began to disappear. She had fallen into the depths of the sea during their sleep, his soul was empty, and without it he could never look at anything without adding a meaning only he knew. Sea shells didn’t sound like the ocean anymore, coast to coast his chants overpowered the splashing waves, what hard did he do to God for him to do such a thing.. He slept for days, and his cheeks had a salty taste to them because of the tears. He wasn’t sure if it was an illusion or an imaginary place up ahead, but he could see the shore. Keeping a straight face, he pulled himself together with his heart full of hopelessness and took a deep breathe of the fresh air. He knew that it wasn’t his destiny to make something of himself in the world of opportunity and find more forms of happiness. He took a glance at the ocean and walked away from it, from home. The second he turned around regret covered him like the ground in a forest during fall. He turned around knowing he’d never see land again, he took a step forward towards the ocean and felt the sand swallow his feet as if they wanted him to stay. He knew it was his destiny to find her whether in this world, or the other, he knew he’d see her again. He had brought nothing but little hope that he was building up in his soul on the boat. Spending his hope daily, he knew he’d go broke. She wasn’t in sight and his destiny began to depend on death. One night, more than usual he began to question God and the plans he has in store for him. He asked God if he has plans for him to take his life away by himself, the emptiness in his soul was like a lung without oxygen, there was no way he could keep going... On the ledge of the boat where he was standing he heard voices coming from the ocean, the voices felt like a rope pulling him in, they must have known the reason why he was debating to jump off. The voices in the ocean had felt the emotion through the tears that have dripped in it. From all the voices, one sounded distinct and loud, it was asking, “Why are you doing this? Why are you questioning the destiny I have for you?” He responded saying “To take her back from you, if your destiny requires pain, I don’t want it, and I’ll find her and make my own.” Without hesitance he jumped off and for that while, the ocean was filled with reason.
David Bojay Feb 2021
lost in mysterious shades
no aid to what I have played
(myself)
falling into an illusion
the pursuit of love
there's no need to desire if it's all around
yet, I'm alone in bed wanting to hold someone to sleep
the memories are deep
I question what I truly seek
practicing everyday to communicate feelings
art is the result
expression through mediums
I've always known.. this is what I would do
there's no room for people like me, so I'll remain in solitude
(i have so many new posters to hang up)
my week has been weird, I sleep a lot these days... it's not that I want to... I wake up and lay... think... long for her...
my eyes slowly begin to close until...
IT'S ******* 1 PM AND I THINK TO MYSELF... I COULD'VE BEEN DOING ****...
(I reason with myself..."you do work from 10 to 3am...every night of the week)
I'm not used to my schedule
growing up after college kind of *****... where I want to be will take some work
(mostly financially)
a stable job... my own place... solitude... good ****...
soon.. I hope
I've been doing my best to overcome yesterdays "self"
even though I know ultimately there is no "self"
little day by day accomplishments drives the human
let me be human with inconsistent reasoning and carelessnes... I'll learn from it
... and also be nothing.. at the same time?
isn't it all the same
anyway, it's 4:39 am and I always wonder why I'm so drawn to specifying the time in some of my poems
it's not that deep... I promise
maybe I should be the first person to introduce cubist poetry??
could that be a thing??
just write about different times in my life in a "poetic manner" and jumping to when I was 10 years old busting my first nut
the internet was weird for me those days
soccer compilation vids of my idols and ****
(writer later on becomes a monster and commits suicide)
(in my dreams)
anyway
these days... I feel alive, I was talking to this girl but I know... it won't work
time requires some entertainment and I'm just... a ******* when it comes to feeling something for someone other than who I'd want to... start a family with...
I know right
those hopes have evaporated into nothingness and I'm here... I'm capable
different people make me realize different things about myself
that's why I choose to expose myself... their way of being changes when I let them know... it's okay to be, no pressure
no ego
we're just a **** load of atoms... communicating
(I don't want to believe in anything)
I want to learn so many instruments
stringed
percussion
****
I'm on a good track.... I believe
I wan't to write my parents symphonies
and the girl I miss...
I always comeback to that
thinking about what to type
live for my wrongs to make them right
go through the dark to get to the light
fear no repercussions, out of perspective sight
I feel like I've gone off track
it's been a long day
I can't wait to wake up tomorrow
I might go get some kolaches later... my spot opens in 4 minutes
should.. I leave now???
mm.... I'll give it 30 minutes
after I post this I may lay down and fall asleep though
I never have the desire to eat in the morning
gives me more time to plan what I'm going to stuff my face in later on
intermittent fasting bro
I hear you can sell your art via crypto currency...I've also made research about how it's bad for the environment???
weird... but I want to give the future generations more time to solve modern day dilemmas... like that ****
it'd be dumb if I fell asleep mid sentence and my computer died... I'm actually pretty tired... I closed my eyes for 10 seconds and thought 30 minutes had gone by... I'm... hungry though (lol)
I think I will go out for those kolaches after ******* all (as my eyes close slowly)
I'm here... awake...listening to Polyphia
getting hype
this solo
how the ****??
my days are numbered
so are yours
we will all vanish... every word people say about us after we're gone means nothing but will be missed somehow
I'm going to end it here
the poem
hahaha
I have... a lot to live for
finally
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