"I'm broke."
Why?
Why are we broken?
Who broke us?

I'd like nothing more  
Than simply everything.

It's early,
And yet I see the faint glimmer of the future,
It's undulating just over the horizon like a sea cow;
Adorable and ignorant.
A heavy beast, capable of violence,
And in need of protection.
I hope I have the strength.

The enlightened say
violence has no place,
But do they value it
anyway?

You admitted a weakness,
A sweetness in your honesty
But I never imagined it could be.

A glance caught,
A laugh shared with ease,
A fool, that's me.

So simply self convinced,
No chance for this.
But then, a light touch to knee...

And like that day you shook my hand,
We met.
And now I see.

So much to learn for
This is your world,
This language is is not me.

But I'm a fool
who wants to learn,
Teach me.

Drawing my hands through the soft, wet flesh of the Earth.
I know already
It will emerge no chalice.

Cowards will bother,
they will force what isn't there.
They will plead something from nothing.
They will praise their hands.

The Earth is something I repeat,
Dipping hand into water, pressing pedal tenderly.
I wipe my brow like a farmer, returning sweat to the land.

Why are things never enough?
I see the form in the form I'm given.

Wind is cold and the sky is grey,
And it just so happens that I'm leather bound.

Fortified for when the weather breaks,
Or the rain falls to the ground.

The snow may fall or the leaves decay,
But no cracks in me can be found.

I like to take time out of ever year to test the waters of mediocrity.

I want to see if I can make the transition, take the easy way.

And every **** year I put myself through it and come out the other side a little proud to see I can't take it. I wont sacrifice any part of myself for the so called rewards.
I wont make your doughnuts, I wont shine your shoes, please step aside I'm on my way to the food bank.

They sell slavery
It's dressed in selfishness
It's called a treat.

We are worthless so we
purchase.

The gym teachers face,
the glare of the flames' light in the glass of his eyes.

The panic is so real, one by one each turning,
where did they think the flames would go?

A beat and then the  alarm washes in like a riptide,
carrying the sock-clad feet out the door so orderly.

It's only heat I say, it's only destruction in all it's mess and perfection.
It's only what I've been wanting to tell someone forever.
That while we balance on these bars, I fall twice as often.

Right hand outstretched, a fist of the gym teachers simple encouragement, the left holding only every fear I've known.

crops on the badlands
I do not yield

hot, pressed fingers
no diminishing resolve
and yet curiosity prevails

the mist in the morning
the sigh at dusk

it wins out against all thought
nam myoho renge kyo

I hear you fiddling about and it's like listening to thoughts.
Not sure if they're yours
or no ones.

Fingers travel awhile on one piece and then just as quick
they're searching for something; like the path isn't clear,
or not there at all.

And you'll mess up or miss something and laugh
and it fits right in.

Break my voice
Take it away, it is of no use to me.

Let my lungs feed only my body, and starve this beast that claws its way to my tongue and bursts into the air around me, poisoning everything.

Let the quiet that surrounds me be enough.

That voice that commits each lie to truth.
Trapped in the circle of "am I awful?"

"I am awful."

I hit the button before I start
Not so clouded I can't see it for what it is
But knowing I'll want to continue

The closet anarchist,
Full of fire, choked with smoke.
Look how that light plays up against all that chaos.