i suppose it's sad
The business of open hearts
so many just leave

shield me from the world
never let go of my hand
keep me in your heart

but i'm too naive
you hurt me, i'm still bleeding
i believed in you

the expectations
the small hope of you and i
has strayed too far

i'm self-destructive
if i push you away, please
don't listen to me

erase the sadness
cleanse this ungodly pain
i can't breathe alone

i let you back in
even though it's so stupid
i still missed your voice

i just wanted love
why is it so hard for me
no one feels like home

how do i let go
give back the heart i wanted
it can't be too late

i taught you of these
these demons i hold inside
yet, you stayed

there's no oxygen
my lungs are burning, and i
can't say anything

"𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦."

"Even if they love you back?"

"𝘌𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬."

you looked as a friend
yet spoke as a lover
talking futures with me
but going home to another

I can't understand if this is love
not yet

all I can make sense of
is the emptiness I feel
when you're not with me

I thought I had fallen for an angel
but
didn't angels fly?
I thought I saw your halo slip off
and
don't angels live in the sky?

I never thought much of the way
you asked me how my day was
every night
and when I'd say "fine"
you'd ask me again
and again
until I told you

I never thought much of the way
when you found out I was sick
you showed up at my door
an hour later
with a thermos full of soup

I never thought much of the way
we'd end every phone call with
I love you
even if you were on your way to pick me up

I never thought much of the way
we've never been
just friends

I never thought much of the way
I've been in love with you
long before I knew it

She carves craters in her skin
hoping the light
she so desperately wants
to find
will spill out.
there is moonlight
trapped
inside of her
begging
to be set free
she can’t help but try
to reach it

and I can't blame you, really
the gods too, were envious
you were never meant to stay

I once wrote about
being written into existence

how I longed for someone
to put pen to paper
fingertips to keyboard
to tell me who I am
to give me worth

how could I have
forgotten

I am my own poet
and I can write just fine

i am haunted by myself
every version of the person
i was
or
could have been
gently stands at the door
waiting for me to join them

yes, love comes in many forms
but you're my favorite

sometimes the only person there for me
is the one I know shouldn't be
I know it'll burn again
I know It will ache just as
the last time

I keep myself in the cycle
but what else am I supposed to do
when on our worst nights we were
the only ones who held each other til
morning

even if it was for only an instant
at least I was wanted

imagine wasting three years of your life
on someone who leaves your most
vulnerable and fragile emotions on
Read 8:27 PM