When silence screams, it deafens all.
For those who listen close shall find,
Mistress darkness beckons to its call,
Seeking to shake up your state of mind.

In darkness lies monsters few dare see,
They encroach from the shadows,
Much taller, much wider than you or me,
Twisted creatures unfold and transpose,

In life there is no greater fear,
To be alone in a cold world,
Means to lose all that you hold dear,
To the point you're nothing but furled.

Mistress darkness beckons her call,
Awaiting her next victim whomever shall *fall.

Like hot rain in early autumn
A hot, thick heavy scent filled the space
Momentos of all she'd shown him
Expressions flashing across his face

A creature as fine as this one
Should be treated with utmost care
Skin turned fire that burns like the sun
Stroked, carefully caressing you my dear

Nothing lewd, if only just as sweet
A formal expression of love
Our future together is right before our feet
Love is free, like that of a dove

You are my one and only little miss
I wrote this poem about our first kiss **

It's funny, the more I hear
These uncertainties need no more fear
All truths become that solely one
Miserable tears question what I've done
I've only ever seen such wounds at war
Not surprised if I catch your gaze on the door

Abusive* & Apathetic
Bashful & Brash
Careless & Corrosive
Depressive & Destructive
Exaggerative & Egotistical
Forgetful & Fake
Glum & Guilty
Horrible & Hurtful
Insensitive & Intimidating
**** & Judging
****-joy & Kidling
Lazy & Lousy
Menacing & Mean
Nasty & Negative
Opposing & Offensive
Paranoiac & Pathetic
Quarrelsome & Quiet
Reckless & Rude
Stupid & Selfish
Troublesome & torturous
Useless & Un-changeable
Vindictive & Veracious
Who the **** cares anymore...Sick of thinking for this...
X...
Y....
Z.....

.

Today marks a very special*  day,
Id ask for a moment of time to  say...

You mean the utmost to  me
I hope after 365 days you've begun to  see
You're the greatest thing in my life that there could  be
Babyboo I love you less than  three!

No one has ever meant as much to me as  you
I am grateful for every little thing you  do
If what they say indeed is  true
Then sweetheart, you and me are stuck like  glue!

I know somedays we feeling like giving  in
When all else fails and our patience is wearing  thin
Just remember that loving you will never be a  sin
After all I was never a man made of  Tin!

This very day is marks the  end
But here's to another year just around the  bend
with gracious words and deepest affection do I  send
To you, the one and only, greatest  girlfriend

You are to me what are moon and  sun
Endless thoughts of you are often why thy head  run
Let us now rejoice and laugh in  fun
Till the day we're wed hub and  ***!

From there comes prosperity and eternal  life
With none other than you as my  wife
Although the road may be full of  strife
We cut through with the sharpest  knife!

So tell me now my  dear
I know our future together grows ever  near
Another lonely night is one we cannot  bear
But I will be here for you always so have no  fear.

I love you,
I love you, you know it,
I love you
*I love you, your baka the poet ♥

They say if you truly love something, you’ll let it go, I never thought I’d be the one to let go...

It was a rainy day in late May, the sky had seen no such rays of pure light, in fact it hadn’t seen the light of the sun in days. Instead ominous dark clouds lurked above. The heavy precipitation did wonders to break any attempt at an eerie silence. *I liked it. The uproar as raindrops pelted on the window, piercing like needles.
We used to sit here, you and I together. You’d be on my lap and we’d look out unto the view. To sit and watch the sunset or as the day passed by, the trees dancing in the wind. The peaceful stillness of life when everything seemed perfect. Now I sit here alone, left to myself and my thoughts. Reminiscing of what once was. Guess that’s why they call it window pane...

I look back, think back further to when we first met. That sweet smile that would always say what words could not. A soft smile that would never cease in reminding me things will be okay. I remember looking upon those pale blue eyes. The way the shone so bright, gleaming in the light of day and sparkling in the dark of night. I always felt a sensation down my spine when they were trained on me. You stood there nervously, shying away as best you could trying to hide your perfect smile. Clad in a baggy hoodie and shorts you awaited for me to approach before throwing yourself into my arms with enough force to send us stumbling backwards. We landed in a heap on the floor. I opened my eyes slowly, and with burning cheeks I find you rather attached to my persons. You're arms wrapped tightly round my waist, face hidden. I could have guessed I wasn’t the only one blushing intently.
Its a memory i'm not likely to forget. It shall remain with me always, a reminder to better times. When we were happy, when we would laugh and play the days away. I miss those days... I miss...you...

We took the world by the throat, we were a team and we could conquer anything. We (like everyone) had our ups and downs, we had fights, we had hiccups in the road but we always worked it out. Thats one of the many things that I loved so much about you. No matter how much we cried, no matter what we said or what we felt, you were always there for me, and I was always there for you. Its how we worked. “The Dream Team” We always came out on top, bonded together with the strongest emotions of compassion and love.

But once again I am shaken from my thoughts, still sitting as I had been, staring out into what could be described as nothing. Into darkness, into emptiness. I think I much prefer living in my head I think to myself, it's so much nicer to me, things are better there...we’re together there...
I think it's on days like these i feel like the world reflects me. Just as the water reflects the sky, a perfect mirror portraying such untruths. Just as water appears to be blue the world appears to be sad. For me.
A selfish thought that had stricken me, left me breathless. The sky has been crying, mimicking my actions. The purest of white clouds had faded to nothing but grey and black, mimicking my once pure happy mind, now plagued with dark greys and blacks influencing my character and behaviour. They say if you truly love something, you’ll let it go. I never thought i’d be one who you who let go some time ago now. I said you didn’t know why I had to, deep down we both knew we did. You (like I) hated to be alone, hated it (like I) when I was forced to leave. One day...i walked away...only this time when I returned. A heavy shadow lingered over me...

She stood up from the bed straight faced, turned towards the door and made her way hastily through it. She neared the door ever quickly tears swelling in her eyes before ripping it open and leaving him sitting in the bedroom motionless and still.
He meanwhile stared at the ground in awe. Trying to piece together the past hour or so and especially what just happened. He remained frozen for a period before snapping too searching round the house for her, calling her name but received no reply. Upon making a round down the hallway, he could hear the door banging against the wall, open and empty...
He rushed outside in a mad panic and bolted to the end of the driveway frantically looking in either direction for her, but by now she was already approaching the entrance to a park she was familiar with, they’d been here before. She was already making her way across the frozen grass, it numbing her feet instantly. They stung as she made each step dressed solely in a jacket and boxers. The cold night air sent her into a shivering frenzy but her eyes were fixed on the pond.
Unaware of the girl whereabouts the boy overwhelmed with guilt and worry sprinted off down the street fueled by determination and adrenaline. Sprinting several hundred metres until he tripped and tumbled grazing his sides and knees, unfathomed and eyes swollen he stood and set off running harder determined not to give up. Through blurred eyes he failed to see a couple taking an evening stroll in front of him. With a loud grunt on the part of both parties he ploughed through shaking his head and continuing as he had.

The girl stood at the foot of the pond walking to the edge of the pond. “This is it...I'm finally leaving this hell I made...” she mumbled to herself as she closed her eyes and taking deep breathes she finished with “there's no going back now...” Taking a single step forward her frame plunged into pond, sinking, body freezing and trembling as it sank deeper into the dark abyss.

The park loomed ahead, with all that was left he pushed forward, hip and side bleeding from the fall. Wincing in pain he burst into the clearing. His eyes darted to and fro’ using the minimal light from the street lights to hopefully make out something, or someone.
His gaze turned to the dark forest suspecting she may have taken off inside, it was his only lead and so the boy made his way towards it only ceasing the adrenaline fueled sprint as the disruption of ripples in water caught his eye. He turned on his heel and headed for the pond, feet numb from the dew ridden grass. Meanwhile just below the surface and falling, the girl’s throat and lungs burned. With that she let out her final breath and begun to sink faster, eyes slowly closing She thought to herself "this is my final goodbye huh....sorry I couldn't make it spark...." The bubbles began to form on the surface of the pond which the boy quickly picked up on.
"Oh my ******* god no....no no no no and no" he began yelling as he sprinted for the pond with a new sense of urgency, ripping his shirt off taking a deep breath before diving head first into the water not caring for the fact he couldn’t swim. The icy water almost knocked the wind out of him as he made contact, eyes burning, swimming faster and deeper. He could make out her pale hand above her head as she sunk. In horror the boy almost screamed underwater but knew better than to. With all he had left he grabbed hold of her hand heaving your body up and grabbing her limp body tightly. He couldn't really cry under water but his eyes started to close and he begun to run out of breath, pushing to the surface he took a breath just before the surface taking in water. He burst through the shimmering wall of black and crawled onto the bank coughing and spluttering, coughing up copious amounts of water dragging a lifeless body, and his own limp one up the steep muddy incline. Spark staggered to his knees resting on his palms, breathing hard and heavy. Gasping hungrily for air he turned to his companion. Her body was cold and pale blue. Frozen. Lifeless.

I dig
You dig
We dig
He dig
She dig
They did

One,
Two,
Three,
Four...
...Watch as sorrow filled tears fall upon the floor.

Five,
Six,
Seven,
Eight...
...Days like these you come to hate.

Nine,
Ten,
Eleven,
Twelve...
...It only gets worse the deeper I delve.

Twelve,
Eleven,
Ten,
Nine...
...It only ever feels like im the only one tryin'.

Eight,
Seven,
Six,
Five...
...Guess higher places, I need to strive.

Four.
Three.
Two,
One...
**...Forgive me if all I do is turn and run.

To the absolute love of my life
You are the epitome of perfection and embody it in everything that you are and everything thar you do.
It's always a bootiful day with you around.
You are the sun to my rise;
The heart to my beat.

I dont know what id do without you
Your loving nature
The purity of your smile and
The kindness of your heart
You are what makes me, me
And why i can truly say I'm the luckiest guy in the world to be your one and only

The path that lay behind us
May be jaggered and bumpy with uncertain corners and paths
But the path that lies before us
Is one in which we're paving everyday

I want to continue this journey with you
The rest of my life
With you by my side
Forever and after
My one true love

There are few times in your life,
That you can say you're close to something massive.
In which you've almost achieved something truly remarkable.
For some, the final moment of college,
The baby countdown, but for me...
Today marks the the beginning of the countdown to the end

This day, 11 months ago I happened to stumble upon someone I never knew would become such an important and big part of my life. Never did I expect the shy girl I'd met online in late December, would make such a tremendous impact on my life.
First came the awkward "hello"
Followed by a sincere introduction
(In which I'd be guilty of miscalculating gender... oh will I ever live that one down hides in shame)
It's one of the most beautiful things to fall in love
Even more so to feel the butterflies in your stomach grow everytime you see them come online.
Talking to you, became the only thing I wanted to do!
I'd rush home from school to jump on and game with you, talk with you and laugh with you whilst getting to know you all the more better.
We would spend hours on school nights, living in the happiness of eachothers company.
It is truly something, when you can look at a name on the screen as they  type, and realize you are
Completely
Utterly
and mind numbingly in love with someone based solely off who they really are
No looks, no sounds. Just personality and who the person is for them
You see I fell head over heels for you my love, you were perfection
It wasnt until a few months later that I caught a glimpse of what you looked like and honey, it was like seeing an angel in the flesh and boy did I fall hard for you. Call me obsessive, call me addicted. You were the only thing on my mind.

March 9th 2015,
"I know I say this alot but thank you. Thank you for always being there for me when I'm down in the dumps, to be quite honest, your the person I've grown close to most in my entire life. Thank you for l-liking me, y-you don't know how much it means to me...I-I'm really s-shy I know and t-this may make you feel a-awkward... b-but...I-I like you too h-hehe and I d-don't say the actual L w-word because it's embarrassing... I just wanted to let you know you mean the world to me..." - Sweet words that changed my life and I'll never forget them

Today marks just, one month from our one year anniversary.
Something I never thought I'd get to experience with anything,
Let alone someone like you.
I love you so freaking much,
You, my other half, complete me and I cannot thank you enough for everything and anything.
I'm sorry that it had to be celebrated,
With you at school
and 4hours of driving between us
But that makes it no less special because wherever you go
You'll always have me in your heart **
                                                              ­                                                *~ Ryan

Why* wont you return my messages
Why do you worry me sick
Why would you disappear like that
Why would you succumb like so
Why...

You promised me
You wouldn't do anything
You would stick whatever may come out, You as well as me
You...

I always knew you weren't okay
I always asked and you'd never let up
I always tried my best to maintain contact
I always would've talked you out of it
I...

We are capable of withstanding so much
We are not immortal
We are fragile, sensitive and weak
We are human
*We...

Guess
Ultimately
It's
(the)
Little
T**hings

There can be no good
Without bad

There can be no light
Without dark

There can be no happiness
Without sadness

But isnt it funny how there cant be a positive without a negative, yet the negative seems to be heavier...?
Humour me

It is better to be good, or for something to be good
That would be, well good.
So to balance out the good, there must be equal bad, right?
'cept the bad outweighs the good you see. Bad is heavier and overshadows the good.

Bad > Good

It is preferable for there to be light
Light is in a generalistic sense, a good thing.
So to balance out all the light, we must also have the dark
'cept once again, the dark overshadows the light. The darkness is worse than the light and presents itself as a heavier presence.

Dark > Light

Last but not least, oh ** **... Happiness, it is the greatest thing,
Thus it is a very good thing.
But to balance out the happiness, sadly there must be sadness, and sadness is one of the heaviest emotions because it outweighs the good, the light and the happiness by so much, the happiness is almost non-existent

Sadness > *Happiness

Beautiful is not a word I throw around lightly
More than pretty
More than gorgeous
You are absolutely beautiful

I love your munchkin height
Think it's perfect
To hug into you in the middle of the night

I love your precious lips
Think they're perfect
To kiss you as towards you my body tips

I love your delicate figure
Think you're perfect
To **** me with your looks as babe you pulled the trigger

I love your adorable smile
Think that's simply perfect
To melt away my problems as the world dissappears for a while

I love you and you as you
Think you're perfect in each and every way
To make me fall this in love with everything you *do

Right here,
In this hollow bed

From weary eyes, these tears are  shed.
Nothing of joy and loneliness  bred.
A torn body, here lay out  spread.
Wondering where every dream has  led

Right here,
In this hollow bed.

From exhausted thoughts, here I rest my  head.
Nothing of candor and engulfed in  dread.
A torn spirit, whose faith seem only a  thread.
Wondering how much more may lay  ahead.

Right here,
In this hollow bed.

From countless cries, here reflection  imbed.
Nothing of remorse and words  unsaid.
An aching heart, this love  embed.
Wondering how long till the day we  wed.

Right here,
**In this hollow bed

Happiness
Happiness
Happiness
Bam *******
Forget your happiness
You dont deserve it

My name is Ryan
Im currently 18yrs old.
I live in a tiny country called New Zealand
Extrovert by nature
I'm happily dating someone younger than me and couldnt care less about societies opinion on her ♡

This is who I am

So I walk a little different
So I'm a little more feminine
So I'm overly charismatic
So I'm into weird things
So I'm romantic and cheesy mixed with cliché

This is who I am

So what I have almost as many photos of Korean boybands as I do my beautiful partner
So what I watch Japanese anime even though I don't speak nearly any Japanese
So what I sit inside all day and game
So what I'm a massive star wars nerd

*This is who I am

Thank you all for the continued
Love and support over the last 9 months

Thank you for the sweet comments
The heartwarming support
And to Nigel Finn who made my Christmas with a sun.

Big thank you for 40,000 views and almost 1,000 likes.
That's phenomenal.
Hope my pieces still bring you joy, inspiration or relation

A little late but here's to a new year!

Don't read this in pursuit of love, happiness or inspiration
I do write this for your admiration.
So I say this once, dont be disgusted nor discouraged by what you see here below
Away stricken with anger I go. . .

Id like to take a second to say ******* you and you
For its because of three yous that this anger ensues
I'd tried to endure it, I tried to be nice
I've now heard it not once but 3 x twice

If you have something to to say keep inside
Otherwise shut the **** up and strap in for a ride
I'm not keen nor willing to find another love
But hey what the hell we'll give him a shove

No other love will ever be better than hers
Dont need no more ******* saboteurs
I will do as I please, and love who I like
Pushy *** know-better-than-yous I thoroughly dislike

So I'll say it now and again and again
From all that stupid *** ******* I'd ask you to refrain
Now thanks for the pathetic waste of time
Didn't know taking back someone was such a ******* *crime

I love being with you.
There is no one else I'd rather be with.
You make me smile in a way no one else can.
You make me laugh like no one else can.
You're the first thing I wanna see in the morning,
And the last thing I wanna see at night.
I've never loved anyone the way I love you.
You're my other half.
My love.
My bestgirlfriend.
My happy ever after.
You're everything I have ever hoped and wished for.

I  love you.
*And only you.