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"suffices" poems
reaching the back of you not sure I could.      not sure i would.        scent of the crime uncommitted uncovered the meandering is the man demigod demagogue taking time          pleasured mercy                                          the remaindered searchingly                                                                                                  suffices you don’t speak plain english the only tongue i got insert the coin in your slot commencing researching the way in and don’t think i want to find the way out to the back of you hiding in the inside learning the way you visualize playing amy winehouse as an overlaying graph to the autoroute to the south of france, sur-la-mer, why ever leave and you come in my mouth poems new each time no exit. no back of you.  stuck in a longingly heaven this house is my home and I know the sun brightest when i put my coin in the slot of play and press the new tune button at 4:10AM
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Mar 18, 2018
Mar 18, 2018 at 4:17 AM UTC
reaching the back of you
It is over. What is over? Nay, how much is over truly!-- Harvest days we toiled to sow for; Now the sheaves are gathered newly, Now the wheat is garnered duly. It is finished. What is finished? Much is finished known or unknown: Lives are finished; time diminished; Was the fallow field left unsown? Will these buds be always unblown? It suffices. What suffices? All suffices reckoned rightly: Spring shall bloom where now the ice is, Roses make the bramble sightly, And the quickening sun shine brightly, And the latter wind blow lightly, And my garden teem with spices.
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Amen
On this tan cutting board You earn your corrupted name: “Alligator pear.” The serrated blade Punctures your hide—a balloon Under a pin’s pressure, Shades of green furling out. I’m sure you’d prefer Vegetable status if you developed Self-awareness; or maybe You’d withdraw from knowledge Of the human type. I trust my cooking songs— Slowdive and Chaka Khan— Can’t hurt you anymore Than your predestined obliteration; Mastication via your domesticators: It all ends in fertilizer. (Where you began!) O, avocado, phantom “fruit” Born of the self-same Life Source, Schopenhauer’s Will, My transient enjoyment of you Within this vegetable salad— An Achaean enclosed by Trojan blades— Suffices for a life of sanctity.
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Apr 7, 2015
Apr 7, 2015 at 1:48 PM UTC
Alligator Pear
traffic in dreams the deeper the love the longer it will be to pay it off deeper the diamond to carve from your heart the darker the desire the more cold cash the harsher the wind in the lonely night take sandpaper to your luxurious soul but you keep its stain from your pretty eyes pretty face barter for fish n chips pretty words barter your bed and breakfast dress it all in fashion from magazines the strange combination of gloss and paper thin disguise the strange combination of truth and lies the greasy haired stranger peers with all his might into the mirror trying to find the man hidden within he traffics in dreams will sell you a plot of land and the rainbow that comes with ten by ten souls wide ten by ten deep sell em to you for a taste of the pretty sell em to you for a touch of the tender so rancidly reflected in his greasy smile you thought the weight was easy to bear thought that the lie you tell yourself suffices but dreams are brittle thin walls you hide behind watch the cracks spread across the pretty picture it is painted with watch the colors fade like sweet summer sunshine the sweet wine turned bitter like tears he sells you a dream that must be forever replaced with an ever darker version he sells you a lie that you will come to see vividly it won't taste so sweet for so long it will taste like dust it will taste like loss you seek him out once again in the dark city passage his greasy hair fallen long ago skin gone gray he found the man in the mirror he found his answer in all the chaos tastes like dust tastes like bitterness seek him out to find he is gone only a shell remains a brittle shell no-one gets cheap seats without paying the price
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Apr 6, 2017
Apr 6, 2017 at 6:20 PM UTC
barter for fish 'n' chips
traffic in dreams the deeper the love the longer it will be to pay it off deeper the diamond to carve from your heart the darker the desire the more cold cash the harsher the wind in the lonely night take sandpaper to your luxurious soul but you keep its stain from your pretty eyes pretty face barter for fish n chips pretty words barter your bed and breakfast dress it all in fashion from magazines the strange combination of gloss and paper thin disguise the strange combination of truth and lies the greasy haired stranger peers with all his might into the mirror trying to find the man hidden within he traffics in dreams will sell you a plot of land and the rainbow that comes with ten by ten souls wide ten by ten deep sell em to you for a taste of the pretty sell em to you for a touch of the tender so rancidly reflected in his greasy smile you thought the weight was easy to bear thought that the lie you tell yourself suffices but dreams are brittle thin walls you hide behind watch the cracks spread across the pretty picture it is painted with watch the colors fade like sweet summer sunshine the sweet wine turned bitter like tears he sells you a dream that must be forever replaced with an ever darker version he sells you a lie that you will come to see vividly it won't taste so sweet for so long it will taste like dust it will taste like loss you seek him out once again in the dark city passage his greasy hair fallen long ago skin gone gray he found the man in the mirror he found his answer in all the chaos tastes like dust tastes like bitterness seek him out to find he is gone only a shell remains a brittle shell no-one gets cheap seats without paying the price
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50
I do not question whether I am happy or unhappy. Yet there is one thing that I keep gladly in mind -- that in the great addition (their addition that I abhor) that has so many numbers, I am not one of the many units there. In the final sum I have not been calculated. And this joy suffices me.
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Addition
It started with a kiss Hand in sand He swept me into the mist That wasn't the plan The music rang through both our ears Playing & playing Delaying, delaying. What was this Not dominance But a mutual self-inflicted full oneness Acting out not a doubt Gain some control While the body suffices & one feels whole. Wholeness or numbness one will never know Whilst playing & playing Delaying, delaying The inevitable
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Jan 13, 2021
Jan 13, 2021 at 1:40 AM UTC
Games amongst narcissism
I. Sunday mornings in Vancouver even pigeons sleep in till 10 A.M. Undaunted, I walk down Granville shortly before 8 seeking lox bagels with capers, red onions and cream cheese, two breve lattes, and a newspaper. In truth, panhandlers on the corner of Robson have far greater chance of scoring. An unexpectedly sunny February morn suffices to spur me on. I am attuned to all vibration. Breath of the awakening city exhales manna upon the shop awnings. Bagels rendered superfluous, I scarf images instead --- trolley buses, an umbrella shop, falafel stands --- delicious Canadian visual cuisine.                                  II. Vancouver is a nymph. Of that I'm sure. I hear flirtatious giggles trill from darkened alleys between hotels. Spotted her once across the street on Dunsmuir, seated on a walk bench reading a Margaret Atwood novel. Bus passed between us and she vanished. Caught a later glimpse through the window of a walk-up dim sum restaurant in Chinatown. Flew the stairs, only to find an empty table and discarded napkin smudged with candy pink lipstick. She watches me.                                                 III. Turns out there are no Sunday morning papers in Vancouver, but I locate the bagels and espresso backtracking on Helmcken. The barista smiles as I approach, sets down her Atwood novel. I leave a Toonie in gratuity. B.C. wind pushes hard on my turned back, as I rush our breakfast back to the Executive. A nymph goes roller-blading by toward False Creek. The Gastown Steam Clock whistles that it's 10 A.M. A flock of pigeons lifts in flight.
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Feb 21, 2012
Feb 21, 2012 at 2:04 PM UTC
In Search of Cuppuccino
I. Sunday mornings in Vancouver even pigeons sleep in till 10 A.M. Undaunted, I walk down Granville shortly before 8 seeking lox bagels with capers, red onions and cream cheese, two breve lattes, and a newspaper. In truth, panhandlers on the corner of Robson have far greater chance of scoring. An unexpectedly sunny February morn suffices to spur me on. I am attuned to all vibration. Breath of the awakening city exhales manna upon the shop awnings. Bagels rendered superfluous, I scarf images instead --- trolley buses, an umbrella shop, falafel stands --- delicious Canadian visual cuisine.                                  II. Vancouver is a nymph. Of that I'm sure. I hear flirtatious giggles trill from darkened alleys between hotels. Spotted her once across the street on Dunsmuir, seated on a walk bench reading a Margaret Atwood novel. Bus passed between us and she vanished. Caught a later glimpse through the window of a walk-up dim sum restaurant in Chinatown. Flew the stairs, only to find an empty table and discarded napkin smudged with candy pink lipstick. She watches me.                                                 III. Turns out there are no Sunday morning papers in Vancouver, but I locate the bagels and espresso backtracking on Helmcken. The barista smiles as I approach, sets down her Atwood novel. I leave a Toonie in gratuity. B.C. wind pushes hard on my turned back, as I rush our breakfast back to the Executive. A nymph goes roller-blading by toward False Creek. The Gastown Steam Clock whistles that it's 10 A.M. A flock of pigeons lifts in flight.
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38
I'm consumed in the thought of my dear As i stare at the vast ocean and lay here The cool breeze that softly brushes my cheek Reminds me of your touch that makes me weak This glimmering star is like your smile at day Such beautiful sight that removes all my dismay How I long to have you in my arms again To be with you till the very end Won't you come and be with me my dear Remove this pain and all I fear For it is only your presence that suffices above all In this love for you I'll always fall Please embrace me as i close my eyes tonight You're the only one i need my shining light Bless me with a kiss from your soul I'm always yours my darling I call
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Feb 25, 2017
Feb 25, 2017 at 10:15 AM UTC
I'm Always Yours
Everything has become so  irrelevant. I'm searching for an explanation but it doesn't add up. Nothing does.   I stay Comprehensive but nothing suffices.  Its a case of reversionist logic.      A impending cycle with no absolute meaning. Fog seems to cloud my judgement so my conscious doesn't comply. Loathed anti prescription swallowed daily, while the white walls and blue ocean make it's scenery. The voices try to compromise,  but it's a debate that holds an never ending rebuttal. Always forced into the unknown.   But a understanding of me, my voice, my demeanor, and my place in this bounden life circle is lost. So you must believe that no one will understand me.   I consider my self a ancient relic. I'm one of a kind but not rare. Cause once someone sees something extraordinary over time, it looses it's taste and someone becomes tired of seeing the same thing over time.. logic at it's finest. We all soul search to fill life's embrace of these mixed emotions. To experience what keeps my sanity afloat.   My vices keep me intent. In a way of keeping my head up and realize what power Im withholding that makes me immune to unknown circumstances. But the path to the void is too simple. My courage consumes and corrupts my will of giving up. But yet again,  it all seems irrelevant. Maybe your point of view on these lines I speak is a clear one. But then again maybe manipulative resources blind you. Or do you see my point?
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Nov 1, 2015
Nov 1, 2015 at 5:23 AM UTC
Irrelevant Relic
The perfume of your body dulls my sense. I want nor wine nor **** your breath alone Suffices. In this moment rare and tense I worship at your breast. The flower is blown, The saffron petals tempt my amorous mouth, The yellow heart is radiant now with dew Soft-scented, redolent of my loved South; O flower of love! I give myself to you. Uncovered on your couch of figured green, Here let us linger indivisible. The portals of your sanctuary unseen Receive my offering, yielding unto me. Oh, with our love the night is warm and deep! The air is sweet, my flower, and sweet the flute Whose music lulls our burning brain to sleep, While we lie loving, passionate and mute.
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2k
Flower of Love
368 How sick—to wait—in any place—but thine— I knew last night—when someone tried to twine— Thinking—perhaps—that I looked tired—or alone— Or breaking—almost—with unspoken pain— And I turned—ducal— That right—was thine— One port—suffices—for a Brig—like mine— Ours be the tossing—wild though the sea— Rather than a Mooring—unshared by thee. Ours be the Cargo—unladed—here— Rather than the “spicy isles—” And thou—not there—
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How sick—to wait—in any place—but thine
It seems that nothing suffices anymore.                                                   I discard everything as useless, don't pay attention to the screaming in my dusty brain. Seems I                                                   can't endure the simplest tasks, I break and feel as if the world is swallowing me whole. It's so hard to get out of bed, let alone                                                   stand up and face whatever lies in store for me that day. Feels like                                                   this rollercoaster is stopping soon, coming to an end. *[My stomach can stop lurching now.]* The fun is done, the                                                   ride is over.
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May 19, 2013
May 19, 2013 at 10:10 PM UTC
Look Closely
Beloved earth covers me so it covers my longing with time eats everything but just excuse this heart my heart is like gold although my body stinks because here lives my beloved and my hope of being one with him at last how can I give my heart to the earth my heart is with my beloved what will I show on the judgment day I have nothing special only this heart is all I have earned no prayers and no meditations my heart is His, and I am His and His is my longing/ thirst how do I ask for Him from Him When nothing else suffices
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Jan 23, 2014
Jan 23, 2014 at 2:23 PM UTC
Story of a heart (translated from Urdu)
A drop of sunshine i sneak glances when i know not to look for one glance would leave me blind and broken behind the nook A drop of moonlight i search for light, in vain by clouds you're as hidden as a winter night and as far away as the wind allows A spark of darkness i light up only to have you fade out silence suffices one to harken and i hear nothing in her shout
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Oct 11, 2018
Oct 11, 2018 at 10:44 AM UTC
I feel you are
Some converted industrial uptown space $20 brunch at a table for one Nice and filling it seems, no room in my gut Nor wondering why I walk gasping for breath Pouring water, wishing it were alcohol Too dumb when the check comes to add a figure Some deep lasting sustenance from that, I figure Stumbling home down block past shop and vacant space Nothing sanitizes quite like alcohol Great to see strangers holding hands one in one Except I'd claw them and beat out their breath Wrenched and stuffed I'd kick them in their stupid gut That's not very nice, I know it in my gut But somehow don't care much more to figure Which story to tell or the smell of my breath When tables for two require just as much space And a spot at the counter suffices for one Despite the sadness and lack of alcohol I think lager, Malbec, other alcohol And there is some deep craving still in my gut For drunkenness or eternal truth, which one? What luck, I'm rescued by a dashing figure Some vibrations in my pocket fill the space Imagination comes up to catch its breath But that's about it, no handsome man with fresh breath Just me standing in line to buy alcohol Squeezing past the register makes for tight space But maybe it's all the sausage in my gut There's no lasting sense in minding my figure So long now resigned to the comforts of one The alternative is an uncertain one And to explain I feel I'm wasting my breath But there's no harm in ogling a nice figure And there's no harm in a little alcohol Oh, poor decisions, I feel them in my gut Forgetting prescient matters of Time & Space Perhaps there is one, sipping on alcohol Inhaling deep breath, with a fire in his gut Awaiting a figure to write lines in space.
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Mar 12, 2015
Mar 12, 2015 at 6:23 AM UTC
Sestina, or Hard Lonely Lines
Some converted industrial uptown space $20 brunch at a table for one Nice and filling it seems, no room in my gut Nor wondering why I walk gasping for breath Pouring water, wishing it were alcohol Too dumb when the check comes to add a figure Some deep lasting sustenance from that, I figure Stumbling home down block past shop and vacant space Nothing sanitizes quite like alcohol Great to see strangers holding hands one in one Except I'd claw them and beat out their breath Wrenched and stuffed I'd kick them in their stupid gut That's not very nice, I know it in my gut But somehow don't care much more to figure Which story to tell or the smell of my breath When tables for two require just as much space And a spot at the counter suffices for one Despite the sadness and lack of alcohol I think lager, Malbec, other alcohol And there is some deep craving still in my gut For drunkenness or eternal truth, which one? What luck, I'm rescued by a dashing figure Some vibrations in my pocket fill the space Imagination comes up to catch its breath But that's about it, no handsome man with fresh breath Just me standing in line to buy alcohol Squeezing past the register makes for tight space But maybe it's all the sausage in my gut There's no lasting sense in minding my figure So long now resigned to the comforts of one The alternative is an uncertain one And to explain I feel I'm wasting my breath But there's no harm in ogling a nice figure And there's no harm in a little alcohol Oh, poor decisions, I feel them in my gut Forgetting prescient matters of Time & Space Perhaps there is one, sipping on alcohol Inhaling deep breath, with a fire in his gut Awaiting a figure to write lines in space.
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39
*it only took the gherkin to take modern into modern via pickle, but the cabbage pickled dome of the albert hall opera was lost to foe foe foo dub step pluck the plucker of twang of drop d uncool; ah wait, gherkin acne pimples roughage missing on the cabbage suckled, with the flush into oyster moisture past the sexed up morbid cupping of the five fingers telling pistons from pistons? i said as much about my ******** as i did about her mouth, just now, and i wash it off and wash it down shaking hands rather than kissing my children goodnight excusing the **** talking sweet chock choke goodnights; well, it's hard to be credited with womanising when only "polygamy" with prostitutes suffices; but i'll just tell you... swan lake was too loud thanks to the ballerinas' stomps... hated ballet... god curse i will be cursed with sisyphus' labours... i rather roll that stone than hear ballerinas dance once more!* let the male cat roam and lay rampage to the night, the she-cat sleeps in, then on the third call for ginger: quarus! quarus! nothing... quarus! it begins to rain... shamanism without the safety-net of psychiatry for post-colonial nations trying behaviourism without anger, with anger sterilised, and certain french thinking of fascination with death and suicide with suicidal thought censored for no reason other than not worked with... well, that better be wellington thick rubber on the phallus when i ask for my money back guarantee nine months later.
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Jan 6, 2016
Jan 6, 2016 at 10:15 PM UTC
i hate ballerinas
Pain's accretion--black snaked with royal purple-- therewith and more of, in cold case of less-- pain inexorable. Fear's favorite pet spoilt with handling. Pain's redemptive quality is repulsed by plain sight, it must mobilize malignancy, purloin the jury, condemn, palm hope to hopelessness. Fixity--its host must remain in firm attendance. Enough is ready...a ripened type of monologue... the crosshairs of silence. To grow demented from overstimulation, breaking the same news to what needs dying. Fetal position suffices...warm, a spinning vinyl record scratching toward dawn. The woodwork calls a name--as a woman hoarse... with labor pain...rebirth.
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Mar 2, 2015
Mar 2, 2015 at 2:02 PM UTC
Pain's Accretion
I want the love familiar chords promise as I smoke by the windowsill and think about quitting. Hair doused in seawater and drying out in the sun, a conjured reality suffices to salt my food, to revive my senses. I want the love of an angry mob, revolution on every tongue and violence never far from the centre. The removal of myself from society coincided with my brief insanity and I should say that I am never coming back. I want the love that remains after that. In the absence of Jesus, in the absence of Fact.
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Jan 2, 2015
Jan 2, 2015 at 8:36 PM UTC
In the Absence of Jesus
half used left side remains empty although dreams are filled with company reality sets in upon wakening when you realize the pillow next you rests unwrinkled nights are cold no body to warm up to nobody to warm up with so an extra blanket is the compromise needing music to sleep when normally silence suffices a bed can be one of the worst reminders
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Nov 2, 2011
Nov 2, 2011 at 9:48 PM UTC
a bed
even a week is sometimes      not enough to recuperate from a novel -     something has borrowed too much time and expects its worth a miracle of a penny found on the road of the eternal walker: long the road toward a majesty of the riches...           whatever novel it might be - and with it,    a paralyzing ****** of doubts - whether sober or intoxicated, not even when: wine and music and a book of poetry suffices... just like now: Beethoven, kalimotxo, and the preferred gems by Frank O'Hara to suit the music... chez jane and blocks... if ever there is something missing in terms of Beethoven: it's a voice reading a poem,   but not reading it, not like a Beatnik who would read in the furore of jazz in the past century...    anything more than what is still not a whisper... and like some farce of the sword of Damocles... the pen of Dickens...         not the labours of a novel, no... not the month's long journey into the labyrinth... music and drinking simultaneously with a novel will never work... but a poem can... my god... some wine some classical music and... words...    when there's music and wine who needs words like labyrinths when:   just on the tip of the hour's passing: a bird in the form of a poem... all i can say in the most mundane phrasing...    but i have capitulated all prior to thrill and audacity for a novel...    a month's labour: and silence...    a soul in such hiding... feels hardly a thought necessary to reinvent itself in its prior activity:    an mingling of wine and music and words: come and go... like all novels:   as much an accomplishment of the writer, as an "accomplishment" of the reader... and is it so wrong to not be agitated with emotion that: a month's worth of base arithmetic sentences - the logic of: once upon a time                as the logic: the end... sanctity of prose:   that sensible nature of that sensible afternoon   of that sensible life,    of that: unlived crucifix       of a shadow's confiscate; routine and sitting akimbo on some far removed stage:   of a sea knocking on the door of earth - seeking rhythm -                           or a heart. as mundane as this language: i'm not going to find a different language to change this evening, even though not awe: or relief... but a paralyzing doubt has overpowered me... and, come to think of it: that's still much more than a heart's worth of sitting's comforts in         the armchair of apathy.
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Jan 16, 2019
Jan 16, 2019 at 7:25 PM UTC
the Quill of Dickens: an observation by Ibai Dalit
even a week is sometimes      not enough to recuperate from a novel -     something has borrowed too much time and expects its worth a miracle of a penny found on the road of the eternal walker: long the road toward a majesty of the riches...           whatever novel it might be - and with it,    a paralyzing ****** of doubts - whether sober or intoxicated, not even when: wine and music and a book of poetry suffices... just like now: Beethoven, kalimotxo, and the preferred gems by Frank O'Hara to suit the music... chez jane and blocks... if ever there is something missing in terms of Beethoven: it's a voice reading a poem,   but not reading it, not like a Beatnik who would read in the furore of jazz in the past century...    anything more than what is still not a whisper... and like some farce of the sword of Damocles... the pen of Dickens...         not the labours of a novel, no... not the month's long journey into the labyrinth... music and drinking simultaneously with a novel will never work... but a poem can... my god... some wine some classical music and... words...    when there's music and wine who needs words like labyrinths when:   just on the tip of the hour's passing: a bird in the form of a poem... all i can say in the most mundane phrasing...    but i have capitulated all prior to thrill and audacity for a novel...    a month's labour: and silence...    a soul in such hiding... feels hardly a thought necessary to reinvent itself in its prior activity:    an mingling of wine and music and words: come and go... like all novels:   as much an accomplishment of the writer, as an "accomplishment" of the reader... and is it so wrong to not be agitated with emotion that: a month's worth of base arithmetic sentences - the logic of: once upon a time                as the logic: the end... sanctity of prose:   that sensible nature of that sensible afternoon   of that sensible life,    of that: unlived crucifix       of a shadow's confiscate; routine and sitting akimbo on some far removed stage:   of a sea knocking on the door of earth - seeking rhythm -                           or a heart. as mundane as this language: i'm not going to find a different language to change this evening, even though not awe: or relief... but a paralyzing doubt has overpowered me... and, come to think of it: that's still much more than a heart's worth of sitting's comforts in         the armchair of apathy.
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96
I’ll keep my fingers crossed That fall back will see me back In your arms for the hour we lack Give us back the hour we tossed We spring forward between the flowers We don’t notice the hour that passes But somehow that still suffices To make us slaves to time and hours We’ll pretend nightly ghosts are our enemies But I’ve learned the opposite in my twenties The sun can be just as cruel and mean If you get caught in all its timely schemes So turn off the lights and hide with me We’ll build a temple where we are free From last minute and a second too late From years forgotten and maybe our fate
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Nov 4, 2012
Nov 4, 2012 at 12:01 PM UTC
Spring Forward, Fall Back
*Hey over there you gods of the earth and other planets Your creature like I, a human mold suffices knowledge not, As you mightly rove all over the sphere and share domains amongtst thyself To reign over the whitenes, Jewry, negritude, sinotude plus yakeetude of mankind, Enjoying your ethereally eyeview onto the earth at your creations, Permit me to shoot up a guestion to you over there in your deitly realm Be you jehova of the jews or amadioha of the igbos,god of the english or anything dogmatic, What happened to your clay mud and tools pertinent in trade of human ****** creation, So that you of late on umpteenth scale have created men who are women And beautiful women who are aggressive mefolk and then ubuguitous earthwise ? What has gone heywire with your human architecture ,when *** organs and feelings Are center stage beckoning for their traditional orientation ? Is homoeroticality your new creation technology ? Or it is man recreating himself ? Don’t you have enough clay ? If material matters do you honourable deities Come to Africa , chief Mugabe bob will guide you to copper-belts Of chimurenga fields were clay is beyond any control, In such quests you will go back to goldenly old Human ****** creation topography That will glorify your deitiness In the old manner of hetereoeroticality.*
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May 21, 2014
May 21, 2014 at 11:58 AM UTC
*WHY CURRENTS gODS ARE CREATING MEN WHO ARE WOMEN VIS-À-VIS*
I'd like to think, That, From the moment I met you, I fell inlove with you. But reality is, I didn't. I fell in love with you, When we couldn't stop texting. I fell in love with you, When we spoke for hours on the phone. I fell in love with you, When the sight of you made my heart jump and my palms sweat, Like it does this very day. I fell in love with you, When I started acting all cool and awkward so I wouldn't make a fool of myself In front of you. I fell in love with you, When you laughed at my jokes and smiled at me. I fell in love with you, When you listened to me complaint about everything under the sun. I fell in love with you, When you put your hand on my shoulder and told me it would be okey. I fell in love with you, As we said goodbye for the first time. I fell in love with you, When you rejoiced everytime I came home. I fell in love with you, As we fell asleep in movies. I fell in love with you, Through the times you loved others. I fell in love with you, On the day you told me you loved me. I fell in love with you, As "I Do's" rolled away from our tongues and we shared out first kiss. I fell in love with you, Holding our babies watching them grow up. I fell in love with you, As you hold my hand, And breathe your last. So I guess, It suffices to say, I fell in love with you, When I first met you, And we smiled at each other.
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Mar 15, 2012
Mar 15, 2012 at 8:31 AM UTC
A Love Letter
my beautiful body is killing me, it longs to seek no rest. even without weighing myself every hour is a moral test. do i even want to be here? could i be here and just be me? but every minute is an endless sea reminding me that i'm never free. most days i feel like i was never meant to be because my beautiful body is killing me. my beautiful body is killing me, it keeps me as cold as ice. i no longer feel my fingers from the moment i arise. and even when i want to eat, looking at a plate of food usually suffices'. and i don't want to be this way anymore, i don't want to be alone. i don't want to wonder for the rest of my life wondering what its like to have a home... but no one holds me close enough anyways, so alone is usually the best way to go. when i fade away from everything i have ever known, my beautiful body reassures me its okay - that its probably better off to die this way. that i was a failure when i was around them every day. that i couldn't ever keep up with any game life ever tried to bestow to my name. and its just better this way. its just better this way. my beautiful body calls so much attention, but never any real recognition. no true understanding of how strong a mission it afflicted me with for total abolition. to leave my mother with all of my favorite sweaters, in an empty room with empty boxes, packing away her daughters necklaces and lockets and praying that it never ended up this way. that her daughter could just come back one day. that she had never become a spiritual stray. that i had never become an apparition with no face, or no name. my beautiful body is not beautiful, it ravages me whole. every day that could of been happy that anorexia stole. i can't help but face the reality that i'm no longer on parole i'm back in it again. and i don't want to be. so don't call me beautiful please. you just have no idea so you really can't see how much of a waste of life i grew up to be.
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Jan 22, 2025
Jan 22, 2025 at 3:58 PM UTC
my beautiful body
my beautiful body is killing me, it longs to seek no rest. even without weighing myself every hour is a moral test. do i even want to be here? could i be here and just be me? but every minute is an endless sea reminding me that i'm never free. most days i feel like i was never meant to be because my beautiful body is killing me. my beautiful body is killing me, it keeps me as cold as ice. i no longer feel my fingers from the moment i arise. and even when i want to eat, looking at a plate of food usually suffices'. and i don't want to be this way anymore, i don't want to be alone. i don't want to wonder for the rest of my life wondering what its like to have a home... but no one holds me close enough anyways, so alone is usually the best way to go. when i fade away from everything i have ever known, my beautiful body reassures me its okay - that its probably better off to die this way. that i was a failure when i was around them every day. that i couldn't ever keep up with any game life ever tried to bestow to my name. and its just better this way. its just better this way. my beautiful body calls so much attention, but never any real recognition. no true understanding of how strong a mission it afflicted me with for total abolition. to leave my mother with all of my favorite sweaters, in an empty room with empty boxes, packing away her daughters necklaces and lockets and praying that it never ended up this way. that her daughter could just come back one day. that she had never become a spiritual stray. that i had never become an apparition with no face, or no name. my beautiful body is not beautiful, it ravages me whole. every day that could of been happy that anorexia stole. i can't help but face the reality that i'm no longer on parole i'm back in it again. and i don't want to be. so don't call me beautiful please. you just have no idea so you really can't see how much of a waste of life i grew up to be.
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Your smile bewildered my thought Trapped somewhere between fantasy and reality Kept by a throbbing emotion being fought All I ask is for you to be with me Your embrace is my air A subtle irony is what I feel Oh destiny let you be fair And concede time stand still Your touch alleviate uncertainty Unburden feelings that suffices to confound Your love is my symphony A music that is forever bound I won’t let it go
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Jul 4, 2012
Jul 4, 2012 at 9:25 AM UTC
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