"outed" poems
strike my eyes lovely
for S. B.
by way of introduction,
when you have gone to confession,
freely admitting you have nothing left for others to harvest,
no seed to plant a new crop, and lies and laughter, interchangeable,
there is no poetry left, not even raisin scone crumbs,
one good friend informs that a forgotten five month old poem,
a computer has selected & resurrected, for distinction
so months later you snicker for you have been seriously
self-kicked away from writing, all your vocabularies,
trite and yellowed overused, and you read
really good poetry and are
slapped-seen-outed by the impoverishment of
your own no-winsome word-smithy,
no delusions, even this, but a-quick script, more a thank you note,
and it’s the only lasting quality is the
genuine nature of its intent
but the poem itself falls bottom of the cliff, short on quality,
a victim of your dissatisfaction
let me explain better
she messages you while the time difference works in her favor,
she reads while you sleep the sleep of the soul-exhausted,
she, scoffing at your claims of motivation deprivation,
as she cherishes this forgotten one,
with words that cannot be ignored
the poem**
strikes her eyes lovely
daggered, this morning phrase cannot go unchallenged
for this a compliment that any poet would
weep for, be inspired by, stung into action,
provoked, ego flattered and challenged to-do more-better,
what writer could want for anything more!
who can own this ability
accept this ultimatum of success, a cross-word crucification
to strike down lovely
the readers eyes, almost all once,
almost excuses me forever
for trying and failing so many times
you smile
but not in the chest where
lovely
needs to strike you
for if you cannot strike the readers eyes again and again, then...
let the moment gleam, and then disappear,
again and again, stored but not restorative
11/21/18
Miami
Nov 22, 2018
Nov 22, 2018 at 7:49 AM UTC
Different strokes for different folks, but if I stuttered when I spoke, there is a reason why I wrote, and if you think that I'm a joke, then stroke me, stroke me...
Empirical lyrically virile and viral a warrior reborn like he's gone out of style,
a rage unabated both non-syncopated and internal/external no meter's abated!
You wanted an anthem?
You wanted a cause?
You wanted a figure to even the odds?
You thought I was kidding
but now you're admitting that
I am the chosen whose broken the clause!
Rising in status, my main apparatus, the attitude: platitudes lack the finesse!
I'm searching for perfect not anything less!
I'm raring to stage an incredible coup, there just ain't a limit to what I can do!
Melding the milieus of millions and millions of masses who clash for the chance for the cash,
when all that was needed was truth to believe in, significance outed, you puppet let's dance!
No bragging, no lagging, and no more sandbagging, the hustle is over, your tussle is weak!
For soon we will savor the end of your flavor, fifteen minutes over, your outlook is bleak.
I'm nobody's pigeon hole, nobody's fool, I've seen quite my share of arrogant tools,
but here are the statements that lead me to greatness:
love me or hate me, go on instigate me, ignore me and gasp when you hear of my rule!
I'm raring to stage an incredible coup, there just ain't a limit to what I can do!
Now join me in raising a fist to the sky,
and pound upon pressure to powers that lie.
Make diamonds of rhyme-ends and squelter your silence
to pierce through the casket that left us so quiet.
Their reign is run dry, and nobody buys it, let's hit this at home so they cannot supply it.
Prepare the artillery pack in your fire, you're gonna need it , if the bars get any higher,
now hear from the jokee, I dare you provoke me, you still talking **** well stroke me, stroke me.
I'm raring to stage an incredible coup, there just ain't a limit to what I can do!
**I'm willing to take it for me and for you, THERE'S NO ******* LIMIT TO WHAT WE CAN DO!**
Dec 3, 2012
Dec 3, 2012 at 4:41 PM UTC
Society is powerful.
It is mash-up of ignorance and fear
Everyone assuming the other knows more
Terrified of being outed
But they all know nothing and they bounce their nothingness off of one another and call them “ideas”
We’ve become a people so lazy that we no longer need to think for ourselves
We read headlines & let the suits do the rest
Letting their bias become ours
Letting their agenda become ours
Who can speak for the people if the people don’t speak?
My glasses didn’t use to be this rose-colored
It’s funny what blood will do to things.
Society is powerful.
We all recognize we shouldn’t be ruled by it, so we go to bed cursing it
but the glimmer catches our eye just we drift off
And I wake up kissing the ring.
Sep 10, 2020
Sep 10, 2020 at 12:35 AM UTC
Even I cannot find this care anymore.
I’ve run vague and dry of all moist thought,
Brittle will scores this round,
All life is best endured no more,
I will not bend to peek at joy,
Each smile a twist, all laughter ups to snort and ugly choke,
Time strides by, a hustler, a tomcat, a victim on the run.
At last the end of dreams, such bold relief.
Not more takes or edits done,
I breathe in whole, without the worry of dismal hope,
Each expectation outed now and free to fade,
I court the hours without a scheme,
Death will pace until my shift is done,
This warm friend who sentences but can’t condemn,
Staid promise, an infinity of next for all.
Soon enough this now is gone,
Rejoice
Mar 2, 2016
Mar 2, 2016 at 9:09 AM UTC
WHO ....
Do you ... " Trust " ... ???
and ... Who are your mates ... ???
cos' people these days ...
MOSTLY ... are Two Faced ... !!!
They .....
Talk with you ...
Like Everything's ... " COOL " ...
But ...
Watch Them .... CLOSE .... !!!
You May Get ... FOOLED ... !?!
I've Fallen .. FOUL ...
of ... " Fiendish " ... Cows ...
Who've tried ... Their BEST to ......
Bring Me .... "down" .... !!!
But I'm ... STILL HERE ...
while they ... STILL CLOWN ...
TRYING ... to judge ...
Like ... Simon Cowell ... !!!!!
I'm ... NO JUDGE ...
and DON'T Wear ... Cuffs ... !!!
But ... Two Faced Liars ...
WILL GET ... Touched ...
by words I ... Write ...
That ... HUFF and PUFF ...
and EXPOSE ... Those ...
Made of ... FAKE STUFF ... !!!!!
So ...
DON'T ACT ... " Tough " ... !!!
If You DON"T WEAR ... " Glove " ... !!!
I'm the ...
" Lord of The Rings " ...
WITHOUT ...................................... Gandalf ....... !!!!!
Guys Tell ... LIES ...
DON'T Be ... Surprised ...
They Normally have ....
A ... " Two Faced Wife " ... !!!
"under" ... The covers ...
They LIE to ... Each Other ... ?!?
HOPING ... Their Fraud ...
Will NOT Be ... UNCOVERED ... !!!
But ..
Big Brother's ... WATCHING ...
Check Out Channel 4 ...
That's where we ... NOW SEE ...
These TWO FACED ... Female ****** ... !!!!!
Who will ... LIE Their *** Off ...
To STOP being ... " Poor " ... !!!!
THIS ....
Is An ..... " ACT " ....
Two Faced People ... PERFORM ... !!!
Now That's JUST ... " TV " ...
But This IS Now The ... NORM ... !?!
From Work ...
to the ... Pub ...
to ....
This Thing We Call .... " LOVE " ....
These Days We NEED ... " Guidance " ...
From WAY UP ..... ABOVE ..... !!!!!
These LIARS ...
DEFY Us ...
By GAINING ... FALSE Trust ... !!!
But ...
CAN'T STAND ... The Heat ...
When Their Ways are ... Discussed ... ?!?
"What did she tell you ?"
"YEAH, what did he say ?"
"He said you're a ****** !"
"He said I was gay ?"
It takes one to know one !"
"Wait what did you say ?"
"You may have a girl,
that don't mean you're not gay !"
These are ... " Examples " ...
of those who ... DISPLAY ...
A Level of ... FAKENESS' ...
In ... MULTIPLE Ways ... !!!!
So WHO ... Amongst you ...
is Simply ... LIVING PROOF ...
That Humans tell ... LIES ...
MORE THAN They tell ... truth ... !!!
I'm Trying to ... Show You ...
to have some ... " Good Taste " ...
Before you ... "Embrace" ...
Someone who's ... TWO FACED ... !!!!!
cos' These Days ... These People ...
Are in ..... EVERYPLACE ...... !!!!!!
From Houses that ... GOVERN ...
to places where people ...
CLAIM ... " Poetic Grace " ... !!!
Some Poets are ... LIARS ...
Who NEED TO .... " Retire " ....
It's Simply ... MY VIEW ...
I May Not mean ... YOU ... ?!?
DON'T Get it ... " ConfuSEd " ... !!!
or ... Try to be ... SMART ...
In The End ...
Time will ... TELL ...
Who speaks TRUTH ...
Through Their ... ART ... !!!
cos' LIES Will Be ... OUTED ...
By ME ... The NEW ... " Shaft " ... !!!
A Brother who's ... COOL ...
and Building My ... CRAFT ... !!!
Don't Think that i'm scared ... !!!
I'm ALWAYS ... Prepared ...
to ... Back UP ... My Words ...
with ACTIONS ... BEWARE ... !!!!!
I'll take you to places ...
Where Eagles ... DON'T DARE ... !!!!!
I'm writing ... Like THIS ...
to Prove i've got ... GIFTS ...
and DISMISS These .............................................................. This FAKE People ...
who speak with a ..... Hissssssss........... !!!!!!
and SLITHER ...
Like ... SNAKES ...
The TRUTH They ........................................................... Forsake ... !!!
and These Are ...
The People ... You KNOW are ...
............. " Two Faced " ...........
Aug 6, 2018
Aug 6, 2018 at 7:48 PM UTC
Why does it have to be this way?
Why do I have to spend years of my life in fear?
There is so much hate for something so natural.
Is it the misogyny?
That I, a woman, dare defy males the pleasure of having me?
Is it religious hate?
That I, a lesbian, dare defy God's image of mankind?
Is it the fetishization?
That who I love is more akin to a **** category than a real relationship?
It could be, or it could be other causes.
The fact is, it shouldn't matter.
We've all heard it, I'm born this way.
After a while, the same argument doesn't mean anything though.
I don't know how else to convey to these idiots I didn't choose this.
I didn't choose to lose my childhood best friends,
Or to be outed to my high school because I trusted the wrong person.
To live in fear that my parents would not accept me for who I am.
To have such a fear of myself, I sabotage any relationship I begin.
I know I should have pride,
and I do.
I just don't know if the good outweighs the bad yet.
All of the good are hypotheticals.
Thinking about my future wife, and house, and relationship dynamics.
I fantasize about a shapeless form that will one day be someone I love.
But for now, that is all it is, a fantasy.
I want it to be a reality,
I want my parents supporting and loving me to be a reality too.
I want to find the person I am brave enough to hold hands with,
in spite of the rage that it causes.
I just want to be happy.
Jun 15, 2021
Jun 15, 2021 at 9:16 PM UTC
The Muted Commoner
You don't see them,
......Just past them......
Speak but unheard,
perforce, thus, muted,
against their will
blogs bread unread uneaten,
poem orphans better than us,
vine ripened unto death
Truly dare you say I/you the better?
Shamed heat, you spit,
outed, no penance offered,
non granted,
the forgivers are muted too
**so this be your charge,
so this be your salvation:**
free the mutes from the trance -
exhume, exhort find them
in the back pages, then
acknowledge that we are all
Muted Commoners.
find the poem unread,
revive it with a read, a heart,
and then you can speak your
Peace.
Jan 28, 2014
Jan 28, 2014 at 9:41 AM UTC
Introduction
_____________
some words
chase you around
infiltrating and winking,
in emails and poems to
your attention dispatched
undeniably messaging
a wanting to be
realized, completed,
teasingly speaking
you know
a poem newly birthing
in your left brain,
tender pleading,
love me already,
just write me
like you would
make love to a woman!"
messages from others employ
the self-same word r e p e a t e d l y,
you start to get the hint
very very v i g o r o u s l y
the rumbling,
the back-seat tumbling,
you're driving
bipedal composing,
guitar and piano
gas and brake
pedals to the mettle,
and the speed limit
was 15 mph under
where your brain is fermenting
all tuning you up to
meet the guild's
product quality standards,
yet unlike an automobile,
a poem, like a life,
has a unique DNA,
cannot just be
recalled,
for repair
and additional tinkering,
jes' because
once it is out there,
it has been outed
sure enough in my
my "started but *** file,
a lazy layabout,
overlooked and undercooked,
the poem below,
a dabble and a muddle,
so ignored, so berefted
for so long
it got this
special introduction
by way of an apology....
Incarnate
She is my poem incarnate
She is the carne of my body
She is the innate of my soul
She is my woman incarnate
she is all I need
in form realized and invisible imagined,
angel and thank god,
devil as well...
Jun 26, 2014
Jun 26, 2014 at 11:06 AM UTC
count thy words
like you count your breathes -
not!
the estimable statisticians
can estimate
the proximate number
of breaths
our lives will take,
the inventory of words,
we shall on average aggregate
we breathe recklessly,
never stopping
to slow down the rate
with which we tirelessly
consume ourselves
think of the
mess of words,
a brain store,
like a breath,
use it and then
purposeful lose it,
once employed,
nevermore,
so write often,
even longingly,
as in,
write long,
write hard,
every word expelled,
a treasure,
returned to
brother poets
for their
consumption and reutilization,
the monoxide,
of a shared oxide
when thy stock of
words in trade,
almost all used up,
perforce,
must write only
short little sweet nothings
well,
in happy desperation,
compose
alliterative allegations,
nonsensical noises,
aiming to pleases
summation of essential humanness
remain few breaths,
issue rhythmic sounds,
colorful grunting noises,
outed
one last intelligible poem
that cannot ever be read
Jan 3, 2015
Jan 3, 2015 at 5:31 AM UTC
Seven New Poems For Seven Days #4: Judgement Day
After you put in some time on this planet,
You kinda know what the world thinks
About you, your rep, what they don't say to your face,
Sure, thingies, time and incidence and circumstance
Can sometimes cause makeovers external,
But each of us know the quality of ourselves,
Self-certification,
you can out your internal self,
Better than anybody else.
So I inquire of myself, about myself,
what will you be remembered for,
if at all?*
Why do I ask, today, now?
Do we not ask ourselves this
On the low down, subconsciously everyday?
Is this a poem?
Most assuredly...
And a trial.
You, the judge the jury and the prosecutor,
The defender, if u can, if u will.
For seven days my mother was adjudged,
Family, friends, hers, her children's,
Almost an 100 years of live, in color, HD, looking back video,
Tales told, memories dug up, old photos explicated,
Who what when where of the details of one women's voyages,
Creations.
I cannot, I will not, do the details here.
Suffice, acts of kindness, faith in people,
Feminist in a strange land, a chance taker,
Gifts of memories, streaming of adoration,
Many strangers are witnesses to me,
This trial a runaway train.
I am outed. There will be no such verdict for me.
I am outed. There will be no trial needed, just a
Summary judgement delivered.
Out yourself.
What will you be remembered for,
if at all?*
Aug 1, 2013
Aug 1, 2013 at 11:25 AM UTC
You raised them
You should keep them
And pay all their bills;
What you raised spills
Over into the common weal
And fears become real
As they are ignorant
Greedy and mean
Worst we’ve ever seen
And no hope of salvation
From your creation.
Are you afraid of your kid?
Is that what you did;
Let him or her do whatever
And you never told them
What is wisdom or whim?
Let them do what they please
As long as they don’t sneeze
In church or belch loudly
Then you can go on proudly
Bragging about your good child
Until they run totally wild
And get themselves arrested.
Then your lies are bested
And your laziness outed.
No wonder you pouted.
When things go wrong
You want someone to come along
And take care of things
And pay the fines that brings
Because they are sweet, down deep.
Then you go back to sleep
Because life should be easy for you
And the things your kids do
Are not your fault, so back out to buy
More magazines about movie stars
And slobber over newer cars
And ***** about the schools
Not teaching them the rules
And how to pursue them
Then you go out and sue them
For teaching what you do
And not what kids should do.
Mar 23, 2017
Mar 23, 2017 at 6:13 PM UTC
I saw the news of that night,
I saw the people cower in fright,
I felt their love fall to the ground,
I knew the fear would spread around,
Down in the place called Orlando
The outed, the loved, the brave,
The ones in closets, dark like a cave,
The lonely, the lovely,
The ones like dogs stomping muddily,
Down in dear old Orlando.
No one had expected what came next,
It was something like text,
You read from a book,
Now don't ever look,
Down in Orlando.
What was once a place,
A very special space,
Space for those different than him,
He thought they were a sin,
Now it's no more in Orlando.
All they wanted was love,
But their souls flew like a dove,
No more of their musical,
Wonderful, beautiful,
Lives in Orlando.
To all those,
Who rose,
To the next place,
I give you good grace.
I am sorry for all that's been done,
I know sometimes life hasn't been fun,
But you didn't deserve,
To be served,
The final, the last,
Place. I'm sad that you passed,
Into death.
Feb 10, 2017
Feb 10, 2017 at 12:20 AM UTC
Still more, in words
In experience
Confusing Familiarity with Comfort
Confusing Comfort with Peace
Reifying confusion, but not successfully
Yielding, on my knees, heart to the sky
Forgetting
Seeing through, a single pinhole in a perfectly realistic backdrop
Pinholes everywhere, more than can be contained
Not containing
Torn all over
Dispelling everything
Stripping away the Stripping away
Trying to stand very still and very quite so I can feel, hear, sense
Perfect realism
Wanting to be convinced by rage
Agitation, but only conceptual
Feeling tight
Feeling rehearsed
Feeling like an imposter
Wanting to impress
Wanting to be convinced of Self, of Realness
Fortified by others knowing, or preferably- admiration
Like being constructed out of sets of other peoples' eyes
Like being made real by propagating in more minds, many more minds, specific minds. In countless beating and virtual hearts, likes, thumbs up
Not wanting to be forgotten, while alive, while dead
Taxed by maintenance and constant imminent collapse
Compassion, like collapsing into a safe lap
Relinquishing
No pretense
Bare being
More naked than when unclothed
Total exposure
Outed, in the light of knowing
Self forgetting and glimpses of freedom
Trusting sighing
Always loving Sad, not despondent, just sad
Feeling continuous
Feeling fragmented
Feeling like motion, like flow
Feeling like thousands of still frames, constant flickering
Grasping at impermanence, visceral
Resting in the middle
Dancing down the tightrope
Knowing perfect poise, brief equilibrium
Reifying stability. Gone.
Everything is hysterically funny
Hysterically
But also, sometimes, just plain humorous
And absurd
Crying
Loving people
Grateful for people
Seeing beauty everywhere
Encountering this, intimate, me, indistinguishable being, but everywhere
Ouch
Awareness
Always coming back
Like an epic
Like a great love story
Like the last wring of that silk dress you weren't supposed to squeeze dry
Feeling like I shouldn't know what I know, like I couldn't. This must be illegal, cosmically illegal
Knowing the inside of my hand
Knowing teenage shame
Knowing being yelled at, towered over, by my dad, in a narrow hallway, eyes glued to speckled floor tiles, feeling small
Loving with my body, with my hands, with my mouth, with my whole entire strong softness
Loving with understanding
Loving with teeth and nails
Music, lacerating
Crying with tears, and snot, and heaving
Becoming one single, concentrated point
Wanting to envelope everything. Really. Actually. Like physically with my body.
Knowing I am not this voice
Or this writer
Or this narrator
Though I am also all that
Aug 6, 2022
Aug 6, 2022 at 12:07 AM UTC
First impression, first date.
You come late, a major sin in your own lexicon,
tango dancing redesigns your hair to curls atwitter,
despite remedial ministrations in taxi,
you text apologies profuse en route,
but you have been outed, and
I am charmingly amused
A warm December eve,
a local Italian eatery,
table by the window,
red wine floes melt your defenses,
allowances made, you're intrigued,
enjoying our dinner of
charming amusements
But really you like my understated swagger.
I like that you like my understated swagger.
Walk home armed, arm in arm,
your paintings I must come see,
Immediately (!),
You offered this as desert, instead of biscotti,
a tour of your new apartment, sleek/simple,
messaging that this is me,
if you ever want to be invited to stay
Inspection over, my smile is a knowing
that this first foray deserves a concessionary accolade,
So in a mode so gallant at the front door,
Adieu you are bid, and devilishly clever,
I merely shake you hand,
leaving you delighted by this gallant, modern,
charming amusement
Looking at my watch, three and half hours
have passed.
Maintaing that in your ways set,
Early on, I challenge your rigidity,
Turning your hair from curly,
Into spun straight Rapunzel gold liquidity,
By asking politely, humbly, on bended knee,
You give in happily,
Charmed, amused at my ferocious insistence
Looking at my watch,
I too, am delighted, charmed, amused, to discover,
It seems my watch is running slow,
For it is now three and a half years later
Jul 4, 2013
Jul 4, 2013 at 3:42 PM UTC
~~~
Testimony & Majesty: Oh God, Why Do You Inflict Me?
~~~
Morning dawning...
Thickened whitened whipped cumulus
come crossing,
no frenzied froth,
moving slow royal, stately,
as if they are the pride of a
celestial navy,
peaceful ships,
crossing from my portal to your port,
traversing from my shade
of the blues,
over to you, poet,
to your personal screen-adapted
CinemaScope version sights
This wind buffets,
re-directing my
morning~borning hallelujahs
this wind, nameless,
call it chipper, fulsome and volatile,
a proud pusher selling a waking up
near-chill pill,
to accompany the real+imagined
armada of nature
it, near and nearer
to you,
to the sky we inhabit+share,
its ***** stiffening energy,
makes some
hide inside,
not me,
I'm outed by the
harsh welcome~touch of this
realized reminder -
who is the master,
who is but
an obedient servant,
choicelessly writing his
psalmist morning devotions...
another poem of sky, cloud and wind?
*Oh God why do you inflict me?
with this time after time obeisance
when I am
metaphor drained and disabled,
abject of adjectives,
simile frowning upside downing,
have we poets not done our dutiful
illuminating your bountiful works?*
yet here I am,
a soul surviving,
incapable of resistance,
your frosted creatures persistent,
wrest my visions into prose,
to add to your overly full Facebook page,
with more fawning praise...
*Angered have I, you, for now nowhere,
tropical rain squall tells all,
humans are toys,
born to serve,
silence your complaining~explaining,
and from nowhere with
rapido intensity rising,
down pours drops of scornful
water whippings,
demarcating our
incoming existence inequality...*
and yet with your
yang and yang,
a reproach for me,
for as it waterspout pours,
it also pours sunshine,
a mystifying warning
to the put-upon poet,
that in the admixture
of nature and life,
all is conflicted,
all is tremulous beautiful,
and now is the
due time...
*due, you,
to complete this treatise as
testimony to majesty...*
~~~
Nov 26, 2015
Nov 26, 2015 at 2:02 PM UTC
you left with no signal,
flying high, eagled eyed,
peering down at
all the towns
you passed over,
blue through burning
but never stopping, stilling
to listen but not hearing
those other throbbing tunes
playing in back of black rooms
oh, how you concealing
the ambiguous depths,
of ***** deals squealing,
the mess of contradictions
you can’t help revealing,
leaving rust, dimming dust
full in on the chokehold
of others hands upon my heart
still
your hearts are throbbing
in synchronization to
the river flowing of my
words needy & begging
for a timely releasing by,
in anticipation of ending
the sun’s confinement
on the other side of the
dark perimeter of the planet
where poets dare to tread
knowing the jeopardy to
themselves when their truths
are outed by the light shedding
come the morning’s birthing
11:44pm
2/28/25
can you guess what movie I watched last?
Mar 1, 2025
Mar 1, 2025 at 1:04 PM UTC
Why do we hurt each other
Why does reputation and ego fuel conflict
Good and evil
We have both—but why
Fear
Spray paint *** in pink on that kid’s locker
Back-bitten turned backs seek satisfaction
The closet
Closets churn monstersecrets
Hypocrisy’s scarf weaves deliberately around two hangers
The gay kid is the first to scream ******
And louder than the others
Do you know the gay kid’s heart
when the outing is seen coming—it’s the worst
the time between ‘getting caught’
and
being ‘outed’ is the most fatal
heart and soul in throat then writhe
a darkness that’s curdled and sour
tears follow their predecessors tracks
on a twisted, wizened face
red lightbulb eyebrows
the chispa releases fear and tension
choked spine back bend in bed
--and social media
Displaced reality
Magnified consciousness
Reread, recheck, redo
Perpetuate and recreate the wound
Contagion medium
everyone has to come out somehow
in some way
drop the hate
drop the leather belts
rope
blade
pills
gun
alcohol
cough syrup
… house hold products
we have too many outs
shed the closet and shed your doubts
Mar 7, 2013
Mar 7, 2013 at 11:46 PM UTC
The sun~poem also rises every evening…
*A.P.U (as per usual):
this testimony~phrase tilts me sideways,
to relieve the condition, needy to be righted
one must expel the belly kicking seedling,
looking to be outed as a full fledged tree,
a poem planted, a gatherer of insects,
giving shade, perhaps shedding fruit
the sun bids adieu, self~same~centrifuge
of our solar system, is indeed alway rising
somewhere, though the light of our naked
eyes weak, incapable of trajectory bending,
to follow its course’s curvature, nonetheless,
we know it but struggle to believe just as we
struggle to complete, compare, and compose
replanted words in your heart, words that trigger,
are the notions inherent, of a center, rarely eclipsed,
that never ceases to offer up nouveau hope in each
of the days, a placenta to fret you blood and oxygen,
once purposed, discarded into darkness,*
b u t
**the words rise again, offering what you seek,
diurnally, need, to find within them, for my child,
is now
our child**…
May 12, 2024
May 12, 2024 at 9:22 AM UTC
(Or, really; ********* me?)
“I know your name
I know your password
I know the **** you rut in
$7000 in bitcoin or else:
I’ll ruin your life!
You will be outed
To friends and family alike
As you view humans
Doing what humans do!
Everyone will know!“
That you are human
That you have base desires
That you pleasure yourself
That you are Everyman
Well, if it’s show and tell time:
Sure, don’t you?
She knows. Not news.
Won’t play this shame game–
Nothing really to lose. Phew!
No longer an extortion ******
(this just happened to me)
Nov 15, 2018
Nov 15, 2018 at 2:51 AM UTC
bathtub overflowing, the kitchen sink a-running,
water water everywhere, everybody, getting a wordy
Saturday po-em, ahem, so only, lonely, love poetry,
high pitches, whimpering, like a three year old chillun,
why not me babe? why not me babe?
words uttered somewhere, everywhere, hourly,
maybe even screamed, sung, shouted outed,
with total justification, incredulous incomprehension,
my ticket unpunched, this fate, an indeterminate sentence,
if only I had a penny for every utterance, be a multi-billionaire
and still dissatisfied
*the isolation au courant makes it a thousand times worse,
sometimes, I hold my own hand, remembering what is touch,
just not to forget, like a lazy eye, a missing limb needy for
scratching, a sensating, sustaining pleasure that sorely
disappoints, for the brilliance of it, is in its eclectic electric,
and a solitary spark fizzles, swallowed up, into disappointing reveries
my eyes wet themselves when I see letters airbone, floating, reforming,
why not me babe?
if mine eyes cannot catch another’s, no across-the-room thermometer saturating stare of farenheightened heat, what good this vision?
left with a single despicable desperate cri du to my conurbation,
why not me babe?
my banana bread aroma flies out the open window to meet
and be greeted across the street, with applause and affection,
but our nostrils cannot taste, our lips forbidden, in this hell,
why not me babe?
the quietude so great, I hear the rhythmic breathing of one who
could be my chosen, my one and only, my love poem, exhaling too,
why not me babe?
but the see-through curtain prohibits strangers exchanging ****** fluids, glances of possibility, and enraged, unengaged, smash all my mirrors, cause they don’t answer my question,
why not me babe?
it’s a reverberated echoing, a slap across my face, married to my cryout, a singular sensation of exasperated silence*
pick up my brass decorative magnifying glass, with twisted ivory handle, examine my hands, my lips, my nose, my credit scores, my personal spaces, my declining weight and bank balance, each excuse, belief,
the white spots decorating my sticking out tongue, thinking there’s another sense I’m forgetting, but all I recall is,
why not me babe? why not me babe?
and that is why only love poetry did not get a love poem today...
May 16, 2020
May 16, 2020 at 11:00 AM UTC
Alone is my operative word.
It works well in a Republic,
With all those booths and secret ballots.
In Autocracies we are wise to keep to ourselves.
I'm relieved to be on my own
With what I think and what I do.
With others, I'm never alone.
I don't have far away looks;
I'm not fully engaged with me;
I can be spotted in a crowd.
I'm part of the gathering, and so,
I repress alone thoughts and actions.
If you're not looking my way,
I'm still not alone.
Some say they're alone in a crowd.
I don't get it.
I so get:
Shunned. Outcast. Alienated. Isolated. Fringed. Outed.
I knew when someone had the cooties.
But I'm not. I'm beside myself. Next to an idiot.
I'll never leave me alone.
Jul 9, 2021
Jul 9, 2021 at 9:11 AM UTC
Tuesday, July 16th
To my darling ex boyfriend, whom I thought was divine but instead was a divine joke:
*It feels like ****** being shot through my addicted veins.
Like I'm on a high and I can't come down.
It feels like I'm flying above the clouds,
Through the stars and into extraterrestrial territory.
It's almost a sick feeling.
So good that I might just throw up from it.
I'm woozy and light headed but I can't help but smile
At the thought of your panic.
I've outed you.
Your secret is known to the public world now.
You've already lost at least one friend,
and now I wonder how you'll feel when you lose more.
You can call me petty if you want to;
cold-hearted, even.
But you should've known never sneak up on a Black Widow.
If you do,*
It's clear that you'll be bitten.
-The Spider
07/16/19
Jul 16, 2019
Jul 16, 2019 at 3:38 PM UTC
I see the lot, denominated in slots, automated in spots, weakest to the plot, and I'm not, convinced it is wrong, nor minced in my longing for a song, a song to the sum, to the sun, to the one unto the ones unto none, nada, nothing, but a hum from beyond, a rumbling from a haunt, stumbling from a heart, belonging to a spark that departed a long-long time ago, where it started, and I'll go-go back there for the harp, for the halo, for the art of it, standing on the stars, apart, but a part of it, I'll go for the horns, for the dark, and for the parts discarded, I will, try my hardest, to remain in progress, a battery that charges for the harvest of the starkest of the larvae unto the fiercest flies, unto spider webs in fragile skies, finite lines up high, where I'll die knowing I flew, die knowing the truth, the use, the abuse, the ruse, the heights of my sight, igniting in the lie, in the cries, so distant now, but a distinctive growl from yesteryear's child so mild, so wild as to be outed by a new sound, so profound as to drown the complexity out, and simply shout from anyone's mouth, reading out-loud and clear, my cloud, my thoughts, my fear, left right here on a single space, where I placed it and saved it away in the seventh day of this resting case, that is all but closed, a screen saver transposed as knowns exposed, and I'm aroused in knowing the doubts are clothed in lace, soaked on display for my placation's of our days, the daze, hazily grazing on the safe, the fates, locked in a slate, for later placement to a shape, I'm hate, wrapped in a hopeful taste, waiting for a saying to say it all, ~ I'm spaced.
Apr 20, 2014
Apr 20, 2014 at 2:31 PM UTC
today in class
i was reading a short story
for American Lit.
The Sculptor's Funeral
by Willa Cather.
it's about a man who has died
and his last wish was to be brought
back to his cruel hometown
to be buried.
"It's not a pleasant place to be lying while the world is moving and doing and bettering," he had said with a feeble smile, "but it rather seems as though we ought to go back to the place we came from, in the end. The townspeople will come in for a look at me; and after they have had their say, I shan't have much to fear from the judgement of God!"
a man that worked under him,
Steavens,
brought him home in a casket.
everybody had something
bad to say about him.
Laird,
a corrupt lawyer in the town,
had enough of it.
he yelled at the townspeople
and outed all of those who had
asked him to bend the law.
he made them realize that
they had done more wrong than
the man who was now dead.
"Well, I came back here and became the ****** shyster you wanted me to be. You pretend to have some sort of respect for me; and yet you'll stand up and throw mud at Harvey Merrick, whose soul you couldn't ***** and whose hands you couldn't tie."
"Harvey Merrick wouldn't have given one sunset over your marshes for all you've got to put together, and you know it..."
this story makes me
want to believe that,
if i'm ever lying in a casket,
someone will stand up for me
and try to clear my name.
even in small, ****** towns,
like the one i live in,
maybe there's at least
one person
with a kind heart.
Jan 25, 2019
Jan 25, 2019 at 4:14 PM UTC
for she who loved me vainly
vainly
*in a way that produced the result she undesired,
my response harsh and swift,
her fan-tasy has no place on serious battlefields
those poem are battlefronts mine,
that are the numbered chapters in
My Revelations
still, she still reads my poetry
think on it, it’s confusing,
my unkind cut that came from deep anger,
it was outed but not for her, because of her
but for me
for to love
permission must be asked and both
given
and the line is wavy but 100% solid.
but reading my poetry, is that a violation as well?
my poems are me inside out.*
but if you look in me deepest,
forgiveness is there,
not seeking contact,
but hate
is inconsistent
with walking a
path humble
Dec 10, 2019
Dec 10, 2019 at 5:14 PM UTC