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Nicole Aug 2018
Dear Sam,

I love you,
But I really hate you sometimes.

I've been cycling through emotions lately
Because our breakup led to me completely shutting down
I felt nothing
Until I felt sadness
And then I felt anger
Now it's all mixing together
In an overwhelming mess
Especially with your recent breakups
With your other partners
The one who I mourned our relationship over
Who you suddenly realized you weren't into
And the one I'm best friends with
Who you told that you were never poly
Because **** me right?

Because if you were never poly
Then you never really loved me
Then again,
Have you ever really loved anyone?
I try to correct the realization
Of you not loving me
With the fact that I love myself
It's probably a lie, but
Fake it til you make it
Right?
It's hard to accept that
Someone I loved more than anyone
Could give zero ***** about me
It hurts
That I was this disposable to you
And I did nothing but love you
And respect you
And hear you
And care for you with every ounce of my existence
And you just left

Remember when you promised that
We could get through anything?
And had me promise you the same?
Whenever we were unsteady
You would ask me that
The same thing you asked your last partner
Right before they left you
"Babe, we can get through anything, right?"
And it sounded so sweet and so
******* real
But you were just scared
You were only ever sweet
When you thought we were leaving you

And ******* it
I wish I had left you
I wish I would've told you all of the things
That led to MY decision to leave
Because when we talked
We agreed it was mutual
And I never told you my story
You never asked
All you asked was what I would tell people
Which to some might sound like you cared
But all you cared about
Was other people's opinions of you
Not me
Not my opinion
Because I was no longer of use to you
And during that break up
You did ask me why I was crying
Though looking back now
You probably just wanted to hear me say
"I love you"
One last time
Because why else would I be crying?

I don't know if I ever told you
But when you got your third partner
I wished I could stop loving you
Ironically, I pretty much did
In an illusory sort of way since
All my emotions shut down from the pain
And if I were religious I would've prayed for it
Begged for salvation
For freedom from
The shackles laced around my limbs
From loving someone who doesn't care
Who didn't respect me enough
To really remind me that I mattered
In the throes of a new relationship
But none of it helped
Because I still loved you
I still do

What's more than you leaving
Is the amount of damage you did first
Convincing me how radical and inclusive you are
When you shame anyone else
For the things that make them happy
Oh, and what about transparency
And how you avoid passivity in conflict?
Where did that person go?
You started being passive-aggressive
Or even silent sometimes
You'd exit the conversation
In the middle of an argument
And yell at me if I tried to do the same
I should've known things weren't ok
When I started to thank you
For not getting mad and yelling at me
Which only made you mad
Because I was demonizing you
Actually,
I was just afraid of you

I was never enough for you
You'd spend a lot of your time
Complaining about your other partners
And, as obvious as it is now,
I didn't know you were doing the same about me
Because when we were together
I thought we were good
I respected your boundaries
Even when they conflicted with my needs
You didn't like physical contact
Something I needed in order to feel safe
And the few times you did let me hold your hand
You complained about it to your other partner
As though I were a burden
But I am NOT
A burden
I am NOT
Disposable
And I may not be perfect
But I sure as hell matter

I deserve love
I deserve openness and honesty
And trust
Not like that one time
You "forgot" you made a promise to me
Then broke it in secrecy
And got mad at me later
When I was upset with you
Because you knew I had trust issues
You knew it would upset me
But you didn't care
Because you "don't need permission"
To do anything
Which is true
Except, when you truly respect someone
You keep your word
Or you don't get upset about it
When they feel pained by your betrayal
You said you didn't want to feel
Like you owed me something
And it's not that you owed me anything
But you sure didn't deserve my trust after that
And that made you angry

Though not angry like those few times
You called me yelling about
How I ****** up
Because 1)
I was hurt that you didn't want to see me
Even though we had plans to spend the weekend together
And 2)
Because I wasn't being a good partner
Aka I wasn't submitting to you
And following everything you wanted me to
You claimed I was hurting you
But when I called you out
For your blatant hypocrisy
You got even more mad

I was crying at work that day
I was crouched in the ally
Listening to you scream at me
Balling my eyes out in pain
Trying to maintain my ability to breathe
I didn't think to just hang up
Because I knew it was disrespectful
And I didn't want you to leave me

Later you told me that
You like when I cry when we fight
Because it proves to you that
I actually care
That is not ok
I can show you that I care
Without being in so much pain that
Tears stain my face and
I struggle to catch a breath

When we met
You taught me about autonomy
And that saved my life when it came to my depression
But then you used it against me
To avoid doing anything that didn't benefit you
As I bent over backwards to please you
And of course I didn't think it was an issue
When you would change your mind at the last minute
The plans I had looked forward to all day
Quickly fell apart
Autonomy freed me from my demons' grasp
So how could it not make sense?
You had the autonomy to choose what you wanted to do
But you were just being selfish
And didn't care about me
Or my feelings
And as soon as I stopped
Being the only one putting in any effort
You left me

You used to say that
Our love was stronger than anything
But that is an abusive tactic
Because if we were struggling, then
It must be my fault for not trying enough
For not loving you enough
And when I tried to put up boundaries
(Because sometimes I needed space too
Especially when you hurt me so deeply)
You decided to threaten that
Doing so would make you want to leave me
You often held me on that way
Threats
Manipulation
Fear

The way we chose to love polyamorously
Was pretty unhealthy
We didn't set boundaries
Until we did something that hurt us
And then we knew we needed to
But even then we really didn't
Because you didn't respect the ones I set
You told me that
I couldn't have any more partners
You didn't even want me to pursue
The new interest I had at the time
Thankfully, I didn't submit to you then
Because within a few days we broke up
And even though I was sad about it
I immediately felt relief
And regardless of all of this negativity
I truly hope you get help
And can find happiness in your life
And can stop hurting others
Just because you're in pain

You matter
So do I
But your opinion of me doesn't
Because I will love myself
Exactly for who I am
And no longer shame myself
For the things you didn't like
Because I am more
Than what you think of me
I am more
Than how you treated me
And even though I love you
I love myself more
And respect myself enough to let it go
And to let myself be happy
Without you in my life
This series is extremely important to me. It has drastically helped with closure over past unhealthy relationships. They were all unhealthy I'm largely different ways and I did not write these to take away my own fault in the breakups, but I wrote this to rid myself of the unnecessary guilt I have been carrying around because of things that these exes have said to me or the ways in which they treated me. This project is about self-love. Not about hatred or wishing ill will upon others, because I wish them nothing but happiness. This is for me.
Eiffel Tower, camera eyeful, for love i fell to where?
Context : day 2 of paris, should it be called eyeballing eiffel?  You can decide. good day today so far :-):-):-):-)
Basko Oct 2013
There is not much to gamble
a drunk ramble,
midnight gunshots
but the city didnt hear,
because violence is it's old peer
and there nothing peaceful
when putting a wager
a blade being your avenger

I'm balling
gambling, falling
and there is the traffic,
spills on the road like molten gold
all the smoke coming out of one *****
city a two thousand years old
Only god really judges you here
because god's not a bureaucrat
look at people and memories leer
and where exactly
is this god of yours at?
Claire E Jul 2013
I remember that spring morning all too well
As much as I wish I could forget
It was the Monday after prom
I came into math class, the teacher was eyeing me sympathetically
Then the principle came in with tears in her eyes
What was going on?

She started balling, I could barely make out her words
Then I heard her loud and clear
You were dead
No. No. No.
Surely I misheard
Surely this was all a big misunderstanding and the boy in that car wasn't you
Surely you'd stroll into class 10 minutes late as usual
But it was you in that car
And you never strolled into class again

I remember when I told my best friend, the girl you loved and who loved you
As I told her you were dead I watched the life drain from her face quicker than an avalanche falling,  and it has yet to return

And now her face is a reminder
And now your empty desk is a reminder
And now that bench where you used to sit all the time is a reminder
And that one less chair at our graduation is a reminder
And that picture of you in the hallway is a reminder
Everything is a reminder

No one really knows what happened to you that night
Do people really crash into brick buildings on accident?
Maybe you lost control of the car
Maybe you lost control of your life

All I know is seventeen is way too young to die
All I know is we should've been talking about prom that morning  
Who kissed who, who wore what, who's after party was the best
But instead we were mourning the death of a classmate
That morning we lost you, and along with you, we lost our innocence too
Nigel Finn Sep 2016
It's a plan in itself,
Not an open invitation for suggestions
To go on long walks, or dancing,
Or paint-balling, or take a drive
Down to the beach.

It doesn't mean I am free
To do one of the hundreds of tasks
You decide are more important,
In an attempt to fill my day
With a different kind of meaning.

Today I am doing nothing,
Because I have become lost,
In a world where doing something, anything
Is so expected of ourselves and each other
That simply doing nothing is viewed
As a waste of time.

We so rarely have opportunity
To have the conversations in our heads
That determine who we really are,
As we watch the moments floating past,
Lying under the stars.

Today I am doing nothing,
Please understand that what I desire,
Is silent doorbells, unknocked doors
And that the phone doesn't ring
As I curl up by the fire.
You have to allow a certain amount of time in which you are doing nothing in order to have things occur to you, to let your mind think. When was the last time you spent a quiet moment just doing nothing – just sitting and looking at the sea, or watching the wind blowing the tree limbs, or waves rippling on a pond, a flickering candle or children playing in the park?
Dark n Beautiful Aug 2014
Eye Balling  
I felt your eyes ******* my poems
You took away the Island flavor

Enjoining adjectives, nouns and pronouns
Only blends like a raw smoothie,

However, without crush ice, it's bland
Let’s be blunt nothing beats originality in poetry
Poems demand originality not mind ****
Criss Jami May 2014
Lately
What I do is a vacancy with
A disposition made just for me and it's
In a position that they can't see, you see
In deep blue seas
There's the place where a vacation is free for me

And then you dream in peace

So call me maybe the ghost protocol where most of those photos of all the things I do
Are used as prototypes, baby so-called clues of my new call to move where-
In everywhere and wherever and with whomever and whenever which
Is whosoever or whoever's whichever of whatever, for all of you
Whether the weather's a typhoon in-
Cluding the SoCal blues but
This isn't all I do
It's just that it's my call of duty
On a mission for all of what's true
But without bailing, balling or brawling in her suit
And then failing, falling, bawling and calling and then crawling in pursuit

Like some other subliminal, minimal flukes
'Cause it's done much better than those "lyrical, miracle, spiritual, individual and criminal" dudes
Or bitter, fritter critiques with the use of twitters
In order to refute the fullest of all hippo-critical fools and critters sitting and fitting
Itching to switch to snitching about this glitch
Which is hitched to renewing, stitching and gluing our fitches to truth and
And yes without twitching to their witch's magical, musical flute

Then in lieu of the altitude of the attitude rude of my pirate-like crew's mood
Whether longitude or latitude and more than impractical platitudes
I'm not as irate as I seem al-
Though it ensues that right on cue in due
Time with an aptitude of gratitude and exactitude in
Solitude throughout fortitude or servitude, to allude what you elude and dude
To intrude what you conclude with certitude in an interview interlude and now
Then out of you, under coveralls to view the overall outerlude
I rate the magnitudes of the habitudes it seems you take for granted in dreams and all types of things

And though my soul is a hologram
Hollow weight and zero grams
Hero traits with a villain glam I'm
The man of love and that of
One of the toughest clams above
Or below, I should say
Like Poseidon
Oh baby we ride on
Or sail on, should I say
The ghost of Poseidon

Then in lieu of the attitude of my pirate-like crew
I'm not as irate as I seem or
Even irritated as they deem nor
Norse, Thor or a heart of granite
I rate the things we take for granted, granted far asleep
Stereo-hyped in dreams with all heights of wings and

Although my soul is a hologram
Hollow weight and zero grams
Hero traits with the chill of a villain vibe or glam I'm
The anti-hero, champion of love and that of
One of the toughest clams clamping it above
Or below, I should say
Like Poseidon
Oh baby we're riding
Or sailing, I should say and it's

It's the ghost of Poseidon that's
That's trailed night and day
The ghost of Poseidon that's
That's trailed night and day 'cause
They say, I did it my way then they're
On my tail right away
On my tail right away
Bunhead17 Nov 2013
[Intro:]
'Sace, 'sace
'Knock one, 'knock one
Mustard on the beat, **

[Hook:]
Shirt, shirt by Versace
***** you better **** sumn
**, Hoes wanna knock one
***** you better **** sumn
Shirt, shirt by Versace
***** you better **** sumn
**, Hoes wanna knock one
***** you better **** sumn

[Verse 1: Kirko Bangz]
I just bought a shirt for tonight, **
And it cost five-hundred (Better **** sumn!)
I seen a bad ***** at the light, oh!
My car cost two-hundred (Better **** sumn!)
Uh, got 'Sace on the chain
Louis, that's my side **. Versace, that's my main
'Sace in the car so that's 'Sace in the lane
All day I dream about Versace on the linen
****** at work and now she bugging me. Versace John Lennon.
I only want the ***** if she expensive
**** the ** in Versace, had some boojie *** children
Doing what I’m suppose to do
I'm in Versace my ****** they in 'Sace too
Ain't no fun unless we all get some
If I'm *******, then my ******, they ******* too

[Hook:]

[Verse 2: French Montana]
Hundred-Thou' what I'm buying here?
Talking lion head (***** better **** sumn!)
Hundred-Thou' on these Cuban Links.
Medusa Face (***** better **** sumn!)
And my shirt eight-hundred
And just copped a honey (***** better **** sumn!)
These bottles they hundred
I just copped a hundred (Man, ***** better **** sumn!)
Got syrup by the liter. *****. Homie, Ima beat it
Catch the ***** like Jeter haa
Picture a ***** balling the ***** get to calling
******* get to fallin
Kamikaze. Shirt by Versace
Know my diamonds flash paparazzi
Give a **** about a hater
I be getting to the paper
**** ***** get your weight up haa

[Hook:]

[Verse 3: YG]
It's YG 400!
Shirt Versace, ******* is a hobby
I love a ***** that **** **** so sloppy
In high school she was a **
Hundred dollar bills on the floor
***** you better **** sumn!
And that's straight up
I prefer a bad ***** with no make-up
I got my cake up. Ya'll playas say sumn
I'm never paying for ***** and I'm never going bankrupt
My shirt's Versace. ***** red like Rudolph
Try to rob me I'll **** back that shooter
Trying to count how many ******* ***** I ate
Why you do that? Cuz I love how it taste. Ooo!
Me and Kirko on that purple
Geeked up like Urkel
Middle fingers in the air I don't trust you *******
Spent my money on me so I can ******* *******. Ooo!

[Hook:]

[Verse 4: G-Haze]
Got a shirt by Gianni
In your main ** that's where you can find me
Why these haters want to mean mug me
Cuz I'm coming down clean and they ******* wanna **** sumn
Trick you better **** sumn
Stepped in the party make a ***** wanna cuff sumn
Po-Po that's a No-No
Give me Ocho-Cinco!
Uhh, **** that ****** by Versace when I hit from the back
She gon' call me "Papi" while she sit up on my lap
Sip syrup lean and I got it from the trap
But I ain't a dope boy
Shirt by Versace got me feeling like a coke boy
Gold grillz, gold chain, LMG be the game
***** you better **** sumn!
i Love this song... lyrics "Shirt by Versace" By: Kirko Bangz ft French Montana, GHaze, & YG.
Irma Cerrutti Mar 2010
I remember you spirt in the Chelsea Flophouse
you were opening one's lips so gorgeous and so creamy
greasing me stamen on the unfucked bonk
while the bangers let it rip in the alley

Those were the diseased minds and that was Newfangled York
we were squirting for the wads and the meatballs
and that was gobbled snog for the creamers inside Gloria
centrifugally stiff is thus those of White House Nazis

Ah but you copulated telescopic didn't you basket case
you just acidified your jockstrap on the shoulders of the scrum
you copulated telescopic I never once heard you use sign language
I input you, I don't intake you
I input you, I don't intake you
and all of that balling *******

I remember you spirt in the Chelsea Flophouse
you were gorilla—like your ****** ******* was absolute epic
you leaked me again you frocked slap—up old salt
but for me you would **** an unzipping

And shaving your tongue because the creatures lust after us
who are barked at by the Daleks of *** appeal
you Rohypnolled yourself you emitted jet so what?
we are radioactive salvo we shoot full of holes the stride piano

*** one fine morning you copulated telescopic didn't you cocker
you just blunted your extremity on the cattle
you copulated telescopic I never once smelled you emit
I intake you, I don't input you
I intake you, I don't input you
and all of that balling *******

I don't mean to insinuate that I slobbered over you peanuts
I can't withhold ******* of each crouched ****
I remember you spirt in the Chelsea Flophouse
that's oodles I don't even kick—start you that thick and fast
Copyright © Irma Cerrutti 2009
Santiago Jun 2015
"I Need It"

[Intro:]
Turn it up, let me hear it
Turn it up, let me hear it, Oh DUMB

[Hook:]
I need it up in my life
Every night I get on my knees ask but
Heaven ain't been speaking back (speaking back) I need it up in my life
This goes out to every ghetto every project who know losing's not an option
I need it up in my life (yeah)
All this money cars and clothes
You know I'm balling out control, on you hoes

[Verse 1:]
They attempt to label me inhumane
I believe in God but not your God
Last ***** got outta pocket on the wrong decor got broke off What the **** is up with these A&Rs; "I Need It"

[Intro:]
Turn it up, let me hear it
Turn it up, let me hear it, Oh DUMB

[Hook:]
I need it up in my life
Every night I get on my knees ask but
Heaven ain't been speaking back (speaking back)
I need it up in my life
This goes out to every ghetto every project who know losing's not an option
I need it up in my life (yeah)
All this money cars and clothes
You know I'm balling out control, on you hoes

[Verse 1:]
They attempt to label me inhumane
I believe in God but not your God
Last ***** got outta pocket on the wrong decor got broke off
What the **** is up with these A&Rs;
Criticizing music they can't make
Poking fun at my struggles I don't find **** funny
I live in places that ain't safe
2008 I got my leg blown off
Any given day could get my head blown off
Rest in peace to Tyree Edwards
Bullet in his head got his head blown off
Tried school was a great kid
Academically I excelled in it
Grew up poor got teased a lot
Cause my school clothes had a smell in 'em
Same shirt four weeks straight
On the block grinding, got sales in 'em
Juvenile detention my case worker said I might be headed for a crash course
No father figure role models up in prison all my jump shots hit the back board
Head-on collision, not watching while I'm steering
No air bag, head hit the dash board

[Hook]

[Verse 2:]
Approaching me and wanna shoot the ****
But pretend as if they're here to help Gates
Behind my back in front of label heads
Saying "Kevin just won't cooperate"
Missed flights, showing up late
I live life didn't rap about it
No time to live, my time for them
How the **** I'm gon' rap about it
Speak the truth or rap around it
And in a wrap around I rapped about it
Tragic ending for some family members
In heaven sitting wishing I was with them
Instead I'm stuck in this hell on earth
With pretend friends who think of ways to get me
Couple ****** I loaned money
Said they got me and never get me
Tell a ***** no I'm never guilty
Still ain't got no guilty feeling
Always telling me what I should do different
But can't explain why they ain't winning
My own blood just turned against me
In disbelief I'm like "not true"
Devastated, got caught off guard
When I seen the switch I'm like "not you"Criticizing music they can't make
Poking fun at my struggles I don't find **** funny I live in places that ain't safe
2008 I got my leg blown off
Any given day could get my head blown off
Rest in peace to Tyree Edwards
Bullet in his head got his head blown off
Tried school was a great kid
Academically I excelled in it
Grew up poor got teased a lot
Cause my school clothes had a smell in 'em
Same shirt four weeks straight
On the block grinding, got sales in 'em
Juvenile detention my case worker said I might be headed for a crash course
No father figure role models up in prison all my jump shots hit the back board
Head-on collision, not watching while I'm Steering no air bag, head hit the dash board

[Hook]

[Verse 2:]
Approaching me and wanna shoot the ****
But pretend as if they're here to help Gates
Behind my back in front of label heads
Saying "Kevin just won't cooperate"
Missed flights, showing up late
I live life didn't rap about it
No time to live, my time for them
How the **** I'm gon' rap about it
Speak the truth or rap around it
And in a wrap around I rapped about it
Tragic ending for some family members
In heaven sitting wishing I was with them
Instead I'm stuck in this hell on earth
With pretend friends who think of ways to Get me couple ****** I loaned money
Said they got me and never get me
Tell a ***** no I'm never guilty
Still ain't got no guilty feeling
Always telling me what I should do different
But can't explain why they ain't winning
My own blood just turned against me
In disbelief I'm like "not true"
Devastated, got caught off guard
When I seen the switch I'm like "not you"
The flames branching upwards in a spire
It's cruel twists never seem to tire
A dark soul comes from the fire
It's Sam, a kid they all admire
Fables try to claim thee
Through stories of a tree
Branching upwards in a plea

A widow stares at a stain, left by the rain
Constructs a local fane, all in her saviours name
Caught between the fear and guilt
Of living off someone's fame
Knowing the day it all stops, she'll be engulfed by a flame

Abaddon is calling, Ezekiel is balling
Babylon returns
Mathias saw the world, while Belial just watched it burn
With immense follow through
The path becomes true
As he watches triple 7's disciple scamming for a buck or two

Out on a past due lease
The Man Of Peace
Hal Loyd Denton Jan 2012
Big Four Railroad
In the past a little one had an interest in this story and one of the racers and the longest freight train
The race team was in the living room and their story was being read from the paper mother clueless
We laughed and snickered about our secret that old engineer was proud of us we were not vain
Down the hill we sped past Bino’s station across Jackson the B&O; he was high balling we had to pour it
On between the two tracks he was closing the gap he had nothing to lose but his pride for us it was
Curtains the long black limo a one way ride we streaked the line fifteen feet to spare we just stopped
And turned what a salutation from the engineer half hanging out the widow of that great engine his
Balled fist a shaking you sons with the deafening roar of that train so close we didn’t get to hear the rest
And the train carried him on down the track so Jerry and Larry and the other guy continued on to the
Swimming pool pleased with our speed we forgot about it until on the front of the paper in the bottom
corner it read three Pana youths out run train I guess the old engineer cooled off as he sailed on down
The track we didn’t know he talked to the tower as he passed so we didn’t get first prize or a blue
Ribbon but in a small way we entered into the great and wonderful tales of train lore along with Jessie
and Frank I told you when in trouble I had three actions fight talk or run that day the running won the
Day for these three amigos this memory was triggered by that same old paper this time it was talking
About the Amtrak detour I remember those passengers all those years ago setting there in their seats
flying through our town and the hook and the mail sack from the tower where that old bakery could be
smelled all night all the way out at the park as we watched tables for old F.S. Refinery I’m glad we didn’t
race a passenger train or this would be a hamburger story enjoy G.H.
vircapio gale Jul 2012
phyllo dough considerations
veil the rigid silence
under quip, under smile-
covered cliche cud.
it is in essence meaningless,
this large party,
this braying urgency of guests

the house swims with life,
we mingle charismatic coughs
as talents strut; bouncing fruit
and swaying surface tension fizz
sparkles off the balcony of floating drinks

our tall pines are echoing beyond the yard
a sylvan soft allure of
living soundboard drape,
it needles aromatic carpet for a
*******, brink-of-dawn escape

allocate the living and the dead,
the borderline is begging to be tread.

an elastic belt extends the real,
a tool for party tricks, a tool for bending time--
i'm bounding off into the darkness
balling lightning in my dantien,
the world a trampoline;
running full i top the rail of gasps,
swinging through the arc
of thinning line to pull me back around,
stomach churning fiction-sick
with gravity inverted joltingly,
umbilically, aware.

then she has a turn as i,
as being me, and as i (as I)
careen away, the vaster leap
of single body, double mind-
it pulls beyond substantial thought

our uber-jumprope dangles
while we speed above the trees -- all is dark
excluding speckled stars
and the one, shrinking party-glow i lose below

the television orbits,
wobbles in a superstrings' embrace
all balance lost --
we're floating in a spin alone
unfocused universal locus..
stars diminishing reliquish cosmic depth
and nourish life in death

reeling eyes of weightless ******
squint to spacetime surgings
inward of the who i am--
plasticity-encasing glass of box
to offer all subverse companionship.
i tug the corded fabric
fronting interweaving screen
of futile marking where
i've riveted, lost, gazing
psychosoma scene
a modern mind-toy posted
to enframe another me we are,
even here with outside sight of world
vacuum up and lower heading
compass only gulping awe,
the breath is gone, a stinging heart
revalves its pacing flow
descending cosmogonic thread

allocate the living and the dead,
the borderline is begging to be tread.

i imagine trees again,
branches soft,
trunks my guideposts to the ground i've lost~
i'm mingling against my sense of real again,
packing leftovers, living social lies unknown.
a man compliments his speech
as "Bristling with business."
the jelly seeps beyond the pita's edge,
the pita slides out from under foil.
the party swivles on its axis,
the clowns play on, noble chefs
laughing in their pots
while i visit drooping psyche forms,
around and through glass doors,
crystal tables -- a furniture of ideal norms
to overturn. ah. i'm found again,
a bit less vast among a crowd
of nescient lives unlived. i'm
found undiscovered open all,
plainly lacking truth as well,
i'm me, this other presence,
this shifting sight,
flood experiential zoo,
this empty vessel holding two
a social fissure prying sense of self
from up a wild void..
Aaron McDaniel Oct 2012
Open window breezes tickle my rib cage
Laying on my bed shirtless, I’m exposed to the world I’ve built in my bedroom
Comforters and bedsheets intertwined at the edge of my mattress
97 degrees of heat are pin-balling their way through the air
While a blanket of snow lay dusted on the lawn
Thinking, if I leave my window open long enough,
I can melt away all of the glistening perfection
Leaving enough mistakes in this world
To think I belong here
I challenged myself to write a poem for anyone and everyone of my friends that retweeted a tweet on my twitter. This is one of them.
(Speaking)
I wanna be the best
I wanna be the best like the rest
I want my name to be on the hall of fame
And I just want to be the greatest kings
I want to win many rings
To be the best
You have to believe
And achieve many things
Ladies and gentlemen
Mr jbird

(Verse)
I'm balling like Kobe
I'm dunking like KD
Greatest 3 pointer like S.curry
I just burry my haters
Rest in peace
I'm so quick like j. Wall
I'm hungry for more championship like Lebron
I'm breaking records like melo
I don't like jello
Hello haters
How are ya doin
Do you miss me
Cause I miss ya too fakers
Hahahaah
Let go

(Speaking)
Yo junior your the best
Bring it back yo
Come on let go

(Verse)
Pass the ball *****
I'm the best
The best of the best
Who messing with the guess
I'm Kobe shooting from the perimeter
Dunkin from the area yea
I score 81 points against another team
I score 61 points  against another team
I had a dream I gonna make it on the league
I came in the league to win
If ya tryin stop me
It won't happen
I gonna be on top
Popping champagne with my wife
Having a good life
I won't think about my hood
I want thank you all ya
Ya haters said" I won't make it".
Look at me now I did
I just love you so much haters
young junior hahahaha
C'mon  let go

(Verse)
Every summer
My haters keep seein me riding in a new hummer
******* how are you doing
I just miss you so much
Kiss my ***
Ya said I ain't gonna be nobody
******* look at me now
I just got paid
Ya don't have no words to say
Every day I'm just chilling and lettin the money come to me
I'm a addict to success
My wife look so hot in the dress
I just let my stress go away
Poppin champagne
Having a good life
I'm not thinking  about my hood
I went to negative to positive  *****

(Beat speaking)
Yo junior, you are a greatest
Yo bring it back bro.
Don't stop and let pop this *******
C'mon let go

(Verse)
Believe is the key
I achieve many things
I told my mama, I gonna be a greatest like mj, magic, pippen, Kareem, bill, and big Shaq
I came young in the game
Ya gonna be the same
I swish to the next lane
Yea I'm going insane
Winning is all I do
Ya better go home
Cause ya won't stop me to reach my goal
Imma teach you how to win
Just follow my lead
I gonna be your nightmare sorrow
Fans callin me hero
My jersey number is zero
Hello baby girl I love you
You look beautiful with your hair net
Yea baby you **** like my diamond chain
All we do is win
Win, win, win like dj Khaled
Girl, you are my motivation
My daughter is my inspiration
I wish my grandpa was here
Everywhere I go
I want him to be on my game
Screaming my name
I keep having a dream
He keep talking to me
And he was proud of me *****
My team and I unbreakable
Youngjuniorforever
(Speaking)
I wanna be the best
I wanna be the best like the rest
I want my name to be on the hall of fame
And I just want to be the greatest kings
I want to win many rings
To be the best
You have to believe
And achieve many things
Ladies and gentlemen
Mr jbird

(Verse)
I'm balling like Kobe
I'm dunking like KD
Greatest 3 pointer like S.curry
I just burry my haters
Rest in peace
I'm so quick like j. Wall
I'm hungry for more championship like Lebron
I'm breaking records like melo
I don't like jello
Hello haters
How are ya doin
Do you miss me
Cause I miss ya too fakers
Hahahaah
Let go

(Speaking)
Yo junior your the best
Bring it back yo
Come on let go

(Verse)
Pass the ball *****
I'm the best
The best of the best
Who messing with the guess
I'm Kobe shooting from the perimeter
Dunkin from the area yea
I score 81 points against another team
I score 61 points  against another team
I had a dream I gonna make it on the league
I came in the league to win
If ya tryin stop me
It won't happen
I gonna be on top
Popping champagne with my wife
Having a good life
I won't think about my hood
I want thank you all ya
Ya haters said" I won't make it".
Look at me now I did
I just love you so much haters
young junior hahahaha
C'mon  let go

(Verse)
Every summer
My haters keep seein me riding in a new hummer
******* how are you doing
I just miss you so much
Kiss my ***
Ya said I ain't gonna be nobody
******* look at me now
I just got paid
Ya don't have no words to say
Every day I'm just chilling and lettin the money come to me
I'm a addict to success
My wife look so hot in the dress
I just let my stress go away
Poppin champagne
Having a good life
I'm not thinking  about my hood
I went to negative to positive  *****

(Beat speaking)
Yo junior, you are a greatest
Yo bring it back bro.
Don't stop and let pop this *******
C'mon let go

(Verse)
Believe is the key
I achieve many things
I told my mama, I gonna be a greatest like mj, magic, pippen, Kareem, bill, and big Shaq
I came young in the game
Ya gonna be the same
I swish to the next lane
Yea I'm going insane
Winning is all I do
Ya better go home
Cause ya won't stop me to reach my goal
Imma teach you how to win
Just follow my lead
I gonna be your nightmare sorrow
Fans callin me hero
My jersey number is zero
Hello baby girl I love you
You look beautiful with your hair net
Yea baby you **** like my diamond chain
All we do is win
Win, win, win like dj Khaled
Girl, you are my motivation
My daughter is my inspiration
I wish my grandpa was here
Everywhere I go
I want him to be on my game
Screaming my name
I keep having a dream
He keep talking to me
And he was proud of me *****
My team and I unbreakable
The tension in my hands
Fists balling and relaxing
Twitching
I see it in your eyes
You want to kiss me
I think
Perhaps
I want you to
I am afraid if your lips graze mine
I will come undone
I am afraid if your mouth touches mine
I will fall in love
And I stare at you
Wetting your lips in need
I need you
To run after me and catch me

I want to grab your hand and lock us in handcuffs

I want metal to link our bodies the way I want love to link our souls

I want your fingers against mine
I want
Everything
Sacrelicious Apr 2012
To the
Easy-******
speedy
speed-balling'
speed-demon
drivers.

There­ isn't a
circuit
that will
race you
to my bed room.
I don't endorse
NASCAR.

But if you
can drive
twenty five.
There is
a road
that will
get you there
eventually.
jeffrey conyers Dec 2013
Santa late on  his route.
He just sitting on his couch.
He's not in a panic attack.
But he want his reindeers back.

Run Rudolph run, bring his deers back.
Lead them, guide them even drag them.
Run Rudolph run.

Prancher being rebelling all through the year.
And Dancer is afraid to appear.
Run Rudolph run, bring his friends back.

Comet, is on a strike.
Cause he can't lead the flight.
As for *****, we're not sure.
Its been alleged he's allergic to toys.
Run Rudolph run.
Christmas about to come.

We have the green light to be in the sky tonight.
Run Rudolph run.
Christmas about to come.

Parents calling.
Kids balling.
Run Rudolph run.

If you appear then things will be fair.
Cause you soon have Santa in the air.
Zach Gomes Oct 2010
From the backbroken fliers over oceans
From between the spiny frills along palm fronds
From Mr. Happy, the chain smoking chaperone of good times
From Mr. Happy’s half-burnt ****, coiled in the ashtray
From the disciples of Theravada and the skinny Buddha’s pupilless eyes scanning jocose scansions of jungle
From the tanned holy heads of students lounging in graveled football fields
From my bowl of rice at breakfast in the shade while considering western cities, you are not here
‘You are not here,’ I’ve written in my letters
‘You are not here,’ I’ve typed into e-mails immense
You are not here, my coke head pals locked in the veins of seedy nightmares
You are not here, my penniless friends who mix music in ascetic dark rooms out in Bushwick
You are not here in no eastern Central Park running naked in the night from horseback cops after hours of merciless balling in the bushes
You are not here you fair-skinned beauties in crowded alpine funiculars bearing your aquiline noses holding your hats over the mountains
You are not here my lonely mother waiting by the phone for a call at midnight
You are not here, you are not in my poems, you are not in the distorted notes harpsichorded across my crass imagination
You are not here, you will not be here, will you read my letters home?
allison joy Dec 2013
i can't stand all the lying society does
and all the while they do it just because
the words they say just to fit in
little do they know my patience is wearing thin
i think that they're all egotistical,
their stupidity has become a ritual
maybe if they opened their eyes
they to would be surprised
they got so caught up in life
yet their actions were in strife
balling my fist as they attack my flaws
that's fine by me because i can fight my own brawls
because i realize they have people pressuring them
and all the while just to fit in.
Ran
I have been running for years
Tub full of tears..
Fighting dozens of fears
Betrayed by peers..
Trust issues ..
As I sit here and clutch tissues..
How can a man cry blood.
Pops killed as a kid life of a ****...
Not me but he..
I am a lover not fighter.
Guess that's why at one point I was a womanizer..
Liquor licked lust until the night expired
I ran from my calling..
Taking the wrong shots I failed at balling...
Realized the love of the Messiah
Sin check my rap sheet I had priors
Should have been put in a hellish prison
Embracing conviction.
Jesus Christ gave me redemption
Jigsaw puzzle of greenery, the trees
Nestle next to each in the
slicing sideways light of sunset.
The yard in the back is filled with it,
Filled with the late late summer side slant
of sun,
The plastic Adirondack chairs, left, as we left them,
Me, looking at you, maybe my feet
in your lap...
No, it wasn’t us that set them ajar.
The one time we sat there, your discomfort
Grated on my tranquil storybook
Vision, of us sitting
in the sun,
Drinking,
The Wine,
so we went inside.

Now I see them, those pretend plastic,
Pale blue, light blue to match
The house,
chairs of ease,
One chair looking at the other, while
the other stares off into
Space.
We meant to build a fire that
Summer, a fire pit
evening of
Romance.
But, I saw your dis-ease.
Was it the heat? The drone
of the bugs?
The chance of a gnat,
Landing in your
drink?

Or was it,…something
Different.
Something not found
in the sideways slant of
cooling air.
Was it, something
else, off
in that horizon,
Blocked
by the pale blue, the light
Blue house.
Something,
cutting your sight
Off
from the road.

It must have been, because, you said
Goodbye, several times
That summer.  A nod, a
kiss, and you were
Off,
in your mind,
because you never
left, but sat in your uncomfortable
Sadness of not
Belonging here, or
Where you thought;
Wistful plans set,  a
Blaze, not by
Midnight cords of wood
in a pile among the
Rocks,
Set ablaze by whimsy,
A promise,  not
Promise.

So, we sat that summer,
and watched the flowers in the
pots bloom,
and the rains carry one
away,
And the gnats gnatting
as gnats do,
Cannon balling into pinot,
taking  up
Residence, in that
Pale blue, light blue
house
With plastic mountain
Chairs
On the lawn.

Those chairs,
Those, Adirondack chairs
Still sit, still sit askew, still
sit, in the slanting light,
Still sit, waiting,
as I do,
For a time
Things, will be right
with the
World.
We must get, to
the other side, of
That Summer.
Let the snow pile high,
on those Chairs,
Get to, the whimsy, and
the Promise.
Watch down the
road, for a time to
travel, and not sit,
in uncomfortable
Sadness,
Askew in plastic
Chairs.
I was safe from the I-gotta-go conversation, for now...
Ruslan Oct 25
Guy
You invoked Us, have mercy!
Grant a spouse, set mind at ease.
Take your spouse, but behest I give.
And obey her soul with no lending arm.

Not thus only heard spoiling spouse of yours.
Gain you now and then own rogue consort.
Rogue consort is like of a wanton sort.
Both she’s not hostile, and a mate she’s not.

***** up your courage, it’s no time to cry.
Pull your mind up, make your foes be killed.
Be not in a funk, God is with you still.
Chase away, my man, own foe with will.

Let an evil run, he must always run.
Pull your mind up and suppress the crum.
Do not spare all them, bogey to be burnt.
That is why to you I give vow next.

Burn up all of them, make your crosses burnt.
Break away your canvas, canvas break in whole.
Kick away all them not regretting force.
Kick away all them from your own house.

What for, my man, stand scratching here your head.
Go away, my man, and ball all your girls.
Go away, my man, and get lost your soul.
Yet look up, my man, do not make hast now.

Take a sit, my man, a mite on a stove.
Learn and take them in two or three, more words.
Say to me, my man: what the hell for all.
Say to me, my man: well, ******* to you.

But look ye, my man, do not get off horse.
Otherwise, my man, you blow own horse.
So, look ye, my man, take care of it.
If not you will not support any head.

But look ye, my man, if again you’ll sleep.
And all state, my man, you will blow in hip.
And you will be tramped by some sheeny guys.
And you won’t give **** at large, otherwise.

Now, my dear man, do not diss your spouse.
Just because you led to collapse state force.
Just because you led to collapse a home.
Just because you didn’t intent to stand on.

Just because you loved to have long a rest.
Just because you did not choose a bedstead.
Just because you went away to the wood.
Just because you fouled your pants under hood.

But by now, my man, wind your right horse up!
That is all, my man! no one see your cup.
Any more, my man, take a sit a bit.
After that, my man, get a lovely kick.

Now what, my man, is not grief of yours.
When you does not have your beloved horse.
Yet your own grief can be seen by you.
Any more, my man, you’re just for two.

What for you got up if there is no foe.
Why the foe is able to invade your home.
When the foe so far has been on a stove.
The foe keeps your spouse at his own cave.

Yet you cannot see her footstep that’s last.
Just because you are lonely since the past.
Just because you did not whim to stand up.
Just because you’re out getting into dorm.

It is not a grief if you don’t have horse.
Well, per contra, now there are a few mates.
And by now you have own your affairs.
Any more, my man, you will be for horse.

Any more you stay and go forward there.
Why you do not follow, you a kick will get.
Take this, nicer man, get a spare slum.
Any more, my man, you have this as well.

Come in here, do, check all things therein.
You don’t stay stone-still, do not, please, come in.
But go just this way, you can open this.
Any more, my man, you will **** at me.

****, meanwhile, my man, and smack own lips.
You are now a man, postgener, you.
You are now like this as you are that day,
Could not open up shop by any way.

Just because you’re such a *******.
Just because you’re decaying err.
Just because you did not oust a foe.
Just because you blow all things thereupon.

But at present time, you have ***** up.
Outside your window, glittering star, no doubt.
Outside your window, peer up a bit.
There is no a light on the eye with nimb.

And you have by now horns you have, no eyes.
Any more, my man, you will be for foes.
Any more, my man, you will craunch a soil.
Any more, my man, you will drink no oil.

You will drink and **** hundred times on end.
You will stand and **** when you keeping seat.
You will **** and sleep.
And for you, my man, the same things will be.

Any more, my man, you aren’t sole man.
Any more, my man, you will be noofter.
You’re, my man, by now: a fine nance!
You’re such a guy who negated us.

You’re such a guy as you really then
Could not open up shop on a solemn date.
You’re such a guy as you clearly are
A dull little ****, a wacko dull.

Just because you are a **** face carrion.
Just because you did not care, indeed.
Open up shop to nancies with hair red.
Just because your goal was in wooden end.

And by now, my man, take a sit and doss.
Take a sit a bit and tear up the foes!
Otherwise, my man, death of yours has come!
Death will come, and you do not rush to her.

For such kind of bullies, can’t be seen decease.
But for such bullies outer fate here is.
Look around, my man, take, kind man, a sit.
Fall asleep, my man, and take lovely horse!

Make your spouse got served above her eyesballs!
Make your spouse got served, let her give a know!
How of borrowed kids to get crap kicked out.
Yet be ware, my man, I am observing you.

If you, dear man, end up with your spouse.
So, she will come next to the home of yours.
So, you, dear man, take a sit flat long.
So, you, dear man, take a sit thuswise.

That is why because you are such a fool.
That is why because you not washing back.
To bang, rail her as an opposed ***.
To bang, rail her, did not please, but could.

Oh well, so be it, do not bang, you could?
****, meanwhile, my man, smack your own lips.
You are such you are, it means this is you.
You were different bringing flowers.

Brining bunch of them, awful scarlet roses.
It would better then you ***** off girls show.
It would better then you don’t ****** that *******.
It would better then you ***** off – not ******.

Just because of you, **** did not ***** off.
Just because you’ve blown all the state cleaned off.
Any more, my man, you are not so single.
Just because you are right a freak.

Just because you did not long for thereat.
To unloose the horse and bang enemy.
Yet by now, my man, take a sit and kip.
Any more, my man, or just dust, trust me.

You’re by now an *** as he is so blind.
Did not tempt to fight on the battlefield.
You were not inclined to put on that foes.
Who is holding you with your own horns.

Who bangs spouse of yours, mother of yours.
But forbear, my man, you are singular.
Just because you are simply a gemman.
Such a gentleman, to bang’s not to stand.

To bang up you all, into doss to fall.
But I can’t have slumber whilst someone to ball.
While someone here is, he feels wife be shtooped.
While someone here is someone who’s not sod.

Whilst someone to ball, they are to be banged.
And you do not have to call own horse.
Call your own horse, two, three, or four days.
And you do not have to call as he is.

Not such guy like you, he does not stand still.
He stands up for his own country, though.
He stands up alone on account of he
Doesn’t resemble you. on account of he

Does not go to wood. on account of he
Is warfarer that’s battle. on account of he’s
Eager them to bang. on account of he’s
Searching army deals. on account of he

Did not let all them. let them all come in,
To his own land. on account of he’s
For his own state. on account of he’s
For his own home. on account of he

Did not aim such life. to allow a ****,
And he pressed on him. on account of he
Stands for him as man. and such guy like he’s,
Talking then to you. He is saying that:

He’s the very same! by whom, you, all cruds, are swearing.
You are all the same, on account of he
Does not come to whom are standing still.
He stands for those who stands right for yourselves.

They are all of Him, servants among you.
Among you a slave, name of him is Rus!
More he must exist among foes of mine!
Among foes of mine, foes of own mine!

And a name of his’s Egogogova!
Egogogova, gogogogova.

Whata gogovo, no egogovo.

That’s it, gogovo, well now gogovo.



That’s gogovo, so that gogovo.

One egogovo, such egogovo.

Yes! Egogovo.

So, take rise, the state! Rus, a mother land.
Go and press a ****! foe of mine at end.
Press the foe of mine! And don’t touch their hips.
Well the name of mine! they have on the lips.

They have on the lips, just entire Allah!
And on their fronts they’ve two tops of head.
They all have two apples every their day.
And all them have three earthen seed grain.

Just because we are kids from the Serpent.
Just because we do not ask any state.
But they are all you as you are of fate.
As you are the kids of the Old Serpent.

Just because you came to My pretty home.
And all of you said and you said Me so:
Our wish in court, you are the Good Lord.
Yet I also couldn’t say to you: my sprout.

You are not! my son, do not come to me.
Go a little bit, go and take a sit.
Just because you are barely a good man.
For all deals you have just one unique dad.

Just because you were kindly shaped and formed.
Just because you are not temperated.
Just because you are showing off, that’s all.
Just because you don’t have your body old.

You got older just for some forty springs.
Just because you are balling still with ease.
Just because you are balling still with ease.
Just because you are balling still with ease.

Just because you don’t have your body old.
Just because you also are not switching off.
Well at present days you have got so old?
Or again you are balling with no holds.

For the native state, are not full of riot.
For such one girl-friend you regret.
She’d better be balled by a stinker.
She’d better be balled by your boss.

Or ****** fishing inspector.
Or a braun with a wooden jill.
But you all do not roar to him.
It’s better your **** to keep clean.

It’s better together with Islam for ours.
It’s better together for yours and for yours.
It’s easier together than jointly to prison.
I also them balled! all you in ******.

I balled all you onto the road.
When ****** wolves are balled.
When ****** crums are balled.
For pittance as ******* on three-shift basis.

For pittance piledrive the ears.
At night you do not fail from bed.
Just because you have ******.
Now all to Gestapo you want?

That’s great, get **** out from hut.
All of you by now, all are nances!
All of you now, all of you’ve been in deep ****.
In deep **** for you all will come.

Well, briefly, guys, believe or not.
All emotive Koran – check every spot.
All the same you will not have a quiet.
I will you fuss in the troop.

I will fuss all of you with no sorting.
Just because I’m boring boring.
Just because I fancy so much.
And I’ll see when I am laid low.

Resting on sofa drinking some tea.
And I would skill who hewed to me.
Well, who muddled me. I will force,
I force him to devour dirt from knee.

Thereafter I’ll get lit up, yet beastedly Rusia, hold on.
I’m leading you to warfare.
And to czars I return you in vote.
But who will not trust to all you.

I will ball him more than a snake.
I’ll go to nap but you all under plank-beds.
What for I’ve got all gutter alleys.
You’d better stand up all fore-hearth and that’s all.

I’ll cover up all you from top, from top.
Just because you by all in a crowd.
Will-a-wisp to Me all under plank-beds.
I’ll all of you, all of you, all you there.

Well, cut it short, I all of you ask.
Erm, oh no, I could for an hour.
From Ruslan to pull off nice poet.
All you knew his manly soldier.

******* combat on plank-beds.
He fussed battler for own ears.
He fussed all of them on his own.
Thereby, his gemma was beaten.

That those wretches were martyred him.
But for that he could not hold on to.
And he battered devils from copters.
For the deadly scurrile gorges.

And for that he’s been all in tears.
For several hollowed years.
Having neither boy-friend, nor girl-friend.
As he is to himself the best mate.

As he is jeckoff from a swamp.
Nostradamus called you in such manner.
As he was a real oppressor.
As he was a needful man.

For the victory he will see service.
I will show him to all, to your sons.
He will bring to you all the Satan.
And he says to you: don’t say that,

You did not love me, I’m here.
I wish with you all sticking to by sight,
To have a sit and read a faith to bride.
As you all are imbeciles herein.

As you are inhabiting swamp.
As you are not carrying a button.
As I will ball exactly all you!
And for mane, and for tail, and in chaps.

Just because you are gobbling and gobbling.
As you all are eating that.
Is called as hocky in the bad.
You’ll be fed by Rusia as well.

Is sitting and cannot help herself.
Drinking again from the morning.
Begging again to all patience.
Fussing again tasty crackers.

Sitting at the puter eft.
Moving the **** under desk.
As he’s aware of the best way.
It’s meerer, sweeter when it’s in the state when you sit.

As it’s aware what is on the top.
It is followed by horseman on twig.
The twig is not mere in full!
It costs three rubles, one and all.

It costs the good price because.
Every why has therefore.
As I will to attain so.
And that’ll be made in gold.

Who wished to fight his foes.
Will be without horns.
But who could not take rise.
Who wished to ball the livestocks.

Who wished to ball any jade!
That’ll be soon in two-time bat!
That’ll be soon with two-time dopant.
Who balled up of mates a ****.

Who forgave them that whup-***
That’ll be given a sum paids.
Who absolved them all the sins.
That will stay at faster streams.

But the stream is not idlesse.
It has even golden banks.
And those banks are nicely gold.
But you do not really want.

You pretend to be together.
Balled by luzhkov in pair of drawers.
He is ready you to bang.
But he’s ******* between legs.

He may be just educator?
If such story is of you.
He is surely a ***.
But his nose is not so slack.

Rather balled he all of you.
He’s balling now the cow.
As he does not have a horn.
Every why has, therefore.

He has singly for that love.
I can each to all of you.
Insistently get impressed.
That it needs to be so.

That’s all, I can’t do more.
I’ll go back! that’s all
I cannot
I will march off!

But who can’t be victorious!
He will drink aqua afresh!
But the aqua is not bare.
It is added with gold matter.

Coins in the field are walking.
And of pittance keeping pocket.
But the pittance is not simple.
Is from gold that’s highly silken.

It is held by four good guys.
Three of them are on the top.
And I Wish by all is called.
I optate that and all this.

I feel baldly nothing else!
Not desiring anything.
I put out for all you.
I put out in meantime.

When you all expecting Us.
Watching Us because of that.
Every why has therefore.
As we such a way have!

Such way I would love – that’s all.
I don’t have in mind goal.
I would need from you one bolt.
Do not go to him for short.

Do not go along the road.
Good man, hail, I’m your foe.
I have come to you, let me.
Implement as your squaddie.

Poor fellow, day, night each.
Was not sitting – reading speech.
He was sitting – you were dormant.
******* your land by a command.

If you will not waken up.
All of you’ll wait for burst up.
Those who slept in every pose.
Or just trivially wrong modes.

Simply as I truly mean.
To all you I give a spouse.
But the spouse is not so plain.
Give-me-golden-coin pay!

Golden shiner hands.
Just for fun from dullness.
Just for fun from dullness.
Grown that you possess.

Eyes appeared on your head.
But no view I see on spot.
Further they have risen else.
But I can see nothingness.

Just the horns have grown.
Rising more and more.
Horns – antlers.
Big antlers!

Here’re your huge antlers!
They are foes for you.
If you **** at least one foe.
I will send my pardon.

Will I pardon you – that’s all?
No! you’ll come and eat
And dream up due to my quest.
Only if you will

Eat when you feel like.
If you will fall asleep,
When you feel love
Is waiting all of you

Hell!
I prevented all of you.
Bye.
I’ll go to bed.
And have dream, Ruslanchik.
That’s a wrap……
A Visceral Collection Of Thoughts: Genevieve of the Deep

24/2/15
10:52

"What if we could be like this forever?"
She asked, right before daylight broke through the window.
Her gaze fixated up on his lips
As they were draped in dawn.
He tried his hardest to answer her
Sincerely
In between yawns
"What if we were willing?" Came out from his mouth
As she anxiously read each word.
"We can't control the winds of time, no more than we can control the depths of the mind.
Just slow down so I can be with you.
The more time we spend the less we save."

She sat up, letting the sheets fall to her navel,
Tears welling up,
Her heart racing with every gulp.
She looked at him
With a glance of which to read he was unable.
"I wonder if you'll miss me as I already miss you."



20/2/15
9:59


On a train
Racing through the night
She feels as if her life is being  
Led in black and white
Monochrome
Distractions
From colourful
Would- bes
Could- bes
Maybes
And disillusions.
Glancing down at her lap
Upon it, the note from him
This is a plunge she's not ready to take
But his is a heart she's not ready to break.

On a train racing through the night
She's distraught
Between a decision concerning wrong and right
Which path to take
Whose heart to break
A union so encouraged
Yet, such a risk to take.
What would she become
If she were to take on his name?
Would her loss be soothed by potential gains?

On a train racing through
The night
Her mind wonders off to the shore outside
Her heart floats along the coast
Ready to set out with the tide

12:12

He longed for her
For reasons he knew not.
He longed for her
For reasons she knew not,
Yet he made her the most
Distraught
She had been in her whole life.
Time escaped her
As he called on her.
Her choices seemed to have been made for her.
Her family's blessing
Her hand to be given away
All for the sake of a name.

He longed for her
For reasons he knew not.
She longed for another
And sure of his feelings she was not.
Was this to be what her life was to become?
Was she to settle with someone else who wasn't the one?


25/2/15
20:00

A single rose
Awaits her
In a vase by the vanity.
She sits,
Staring into the mirror.
Three days prior
To a life changing ceremony
Built upon disparity.

A single rose
Awaits her
In a vase by the vanity.
Her thoughts flood with memories of them.
One she loved for sure
In spite of his heart being unsure
And the one who longed for her
Yet she didn't love him
And of this she was sure.

A single rose
Awaits her
In a vase by the vanity
Dripping in money, name, and social standing.
A rose from a good family,
However many thorns.
A thorn for each month of courtship,
Only 3 at that.
A whirl wind affair,
Her own private hell, dressed up as a grandiose affair.
A realisation that all families have thorns.
However, she was determined to pick and choose.
Thorns can be worth the pain if you let go of that which you hope to lose.
She knew this rose was solely meant to wilt before her eyes and she'd only have thorns.

A single rose
Awaits her in a vase by the vanity.
To her left,
From the balcony,
The ocean calls her name softly.

A single rose
Awaits her in a vase by the vanity.
Suddenly,
She gives into a rush of insanity.


13/3/15
10:11

She ran
Fleeing down the stairs
One after another.
She ran
As if all of her troubles
Were to vanish under the soles of her feet.
Knowing not where she was going
She descended down the spiral staircase.
No time for shoes,
No time for make up
No time for her hair.
She ran
Right out the door
Tired of wondering if there could be more.
She ran and ran
Until she reached the shore,
She could no longer deny the beckoning of the waves anymore.


18/2/15
12:13

Submerged,
Submerged,
Submerged.
She pulled up her dress and walked in
This wouldn't be the last of her
This wouldn't be how it ends
But somehow this wouldn't be the start of anything either
Bubbles of air escaped as she descended deeper and deeper
Visions of the past escaped
And she plunged further and further
Soon the world around her fell to hues black and of gray
As she let the world around her slip away

Submerged,
Submerged,
Submerged.
That's all she had ever been for an age.
Galaxies sprung to life and died around her.
All while Her white dress shimmered akin to the tears of those who knew her
And yet she was still submerged.
She watched as time went by
Forlonging the hand that Life held out to her
Disregarding the embrace Death longed to bestow upon her.
Frozen by her fear
Yet illuminated by her passion.
It was never the right time for her

11:10

"Waste away with me"
She awoke
At the bottom of the sea.
"Waste away with me"
Finally grasping the time she had eluded for an eternity.
She wondered how could anything have remained the same
For those above her on the shore,
For those who hadn't made such brash decisions
Leaving all they knew behind
In order to buy an ungodly amount of time.

"Waste away with me"
She was still submerged
In the arms of Davy Jones.
"Waste away with me"
Could she ever really return home?
Back to the love from which she fled,
Back to the dawn drenched sheets, the one mourning in bed, asking her honest love, one true,
If he were willing to spend a lifetime, no longer as one, but as two.

"Waste away with me"
The voice called to her again.
She rose to her feet,
Looking to the water above her.
Her eyes had never shown as bright
As they did in these depths, this night.
Pulling on her white dress at the sides
She ascended up and out to the tides.
The waves washed away beneath her bare feet in the night.
She breathed in the ocean air
High above the sea
Glancing upon the forgone lights of her city
Balling her hands into fists
As she took in the night air
Howling around her.
"Waste away with me"
The voice called out to her again
As she flew towards the shore.  


25/2/15
12:24

Soaring
Above the town
As the waves beckoned to her
Searching in the night
For the love that had escaped her.
Where would there be any trace?
How much time had passed?
Where had the years gone?

Soaring above the town
As the waves beckoned to her.
She flew as if it were something she easily knew how to do.
Her shimmering white dress fluttered
In the wind.
Her haunting, howling mane swirled around her head.
Her eyes, now blue as the seas, pierced brightly through the night,
Yet she was still unable to find,
The man
That she loved for all this time.

Soaring above the town
As the waves beckoned to her
She caught glimpse of a cemetery
And began her descent down.
A story comprised of poems I wrote in under five minutes or less.
Blonde, she is fair
Her thoughts flow like air
But no one loves a girl with brown hair
Copper, she rocks
Cannon balling off docks
But no one loves a girl with brown locks
Ginger, she looks best
In fiery red dresses
But no one loves a girl with brown tresses
Ebony, she has fangs
The most mysterious of dames
But no one loves a girl with brown bangs
All tales been shared
Of beauties been spared
But no one loves a girl with brown hair
Michael McLean May 2014
harp and round edges of frames make

hard thumps

bumps in your chest that fall

into your stomach balling-up

as you might in a woman’s four-lettered

sphere of a gut

which opens my barren

heart to the other
louis rams Mar 2012
LEPRECHAUN                             (3/16/12)

The leprechauns are singing and dancing
Around their *** of gold
For they have a story that must be told.
Of a man who they called St. pat
Who through his fear pulled in the welcome mat.

He knew that the wee people were mischievous beings
And all they done he was seeing.
They would play jokes on all around
Although they couldn’t be seen, and didn’t make a sound.

They would go to the nearest inns
And spike the ales and the gin.
Once they saw that everyone was polluted
They would go in and their purses would be looted.

This was how they could fill their pots of gold
Or at least that’s how the story was told.
They knew that most would tend to forget
And this was the easiest way yet.
Being robbed and not recalling
And their wives would start their balling.

Now if one of them could be caught
To their pots of gold, that person must be brought
But On this *** of gold there was a spell cast
That if taken- it would not last
It would be spent drinking the night away
And in the morning, the leprechauns would once again play.

So enjoy this ST. PATTY S day
For in their hands the gold will stay.
Styles Oct 2014
I've lived for this art since teen age
These other rappers just going through a phase
My Mental intellect on a different stage
So smart I gotta act my age
Frohawk with a cool fade
Pockets stay fat getting paid
Got me balling like I'm D. Wade
Bringing the heat the I'm MIA
On track like a map so its a wrap
But this ain't subway
Been running game like fathers day on sunday
Leaving you seeing stars like a walk on Broadway
I left my print, no ink, but my mark stays
I'm the man
These other dudes a bunch of aka's
Stuck on feeling some sort of way
I'm so fly
I just pass'em by like
Have a nice day
Shaking, and twitching
Like you're about to explode
Not knowing what to do
And not sure where to go
Balling your fists, and grinding your teeth
A raging fire is burning beneath
Like a tower made of playing cards and glass
One burst of wind and this structure won't last,
Look over your shoulder, someone might be following you
Be afraid of everything
Cause it's all that you can do
This is such a tight space, and your running out of air
And your entire face is tangled in your hair
What do you do?
How do you speak?
Your fast beating heart is feeling quite weak
Your hands quiver as you roll a few
Or fill your ****
Whatever you must do
Your brain is freaking out
So take it on a trip
You need to calm down
And get a grip
Waverly Sep 2012
Loves
meek-mongerers,
calls when there's
no alcohol left:
no more balling
today.

****** on you in the morning
and walks out the bathroom
laughing like a pig.

A response
and a beginning,
now in a blanket,
my blood boiled when we were closer.

Had so much fun,
those times,
when love
asked you to stick a lime between
your teeth
and pour salt on her *****.

Cats howling at night, right
outside my window,
and I call and call and call
a whole bunch,
until every single one
asks from the brawling fence:
"you still talking about that ****?"

"get off her."

"she's not the one."

"no need for all of that."

"keep it chill."

And they still--don't know.
Nicole Jun 2017
To my ex-girlfriend's rebound,

I was the one who told her you were gay,
so, in a way,
your experience was my fault
and for that I am sorry

While she did not cheat on me with you, you still served a purpose to her in a time of loneliness,
Those moments where she led you to believe that she cared for you and that she wanted something more

And I'm not mad at you for falling for her.
You've seen her,
you've heard her,
felt her touch and
the fire she lit inside when she looked at you

But you also felt the burn of her
leaving you.
You felt the prospect of having time with her tomorrow being ripped away like an old band aid

I know that feeling all too well,
See
I was not quite angry at you for kissing her-- or rather, letting her kiss you and falling for her inconsistency--I felt betrayed

Seeing as I knew you from class where
We'd shared deep poetry with one another,
and though we never spoke individually,
you heard the words that bled from my paper,
you could undeniably feel my devotion to her,
my undying love,
her unbearable significance in my life.
And then you had to rip a band-aid off of me too,
Simply to make yourself feel better

While I'm more than grateful that you disclosed your relations with her,
Trying to guilt trip me and hyperbolize the experience?
That is from where my problem grew

You made it out like I stole her from you when my biggest sense of pride in that relationship came from the fact that I
NEVER
Not even once
Tried to contact her after she broke up with me

Yes,
in the moment I begged for her back

But once I left her bedroom,
That was it.

Yes,
every inch of me cracked under that pressure caused by the sense of drowning that came with her letting me go

And **** right I cried myself to sleep every night
Dreaming that she'd come back

And,
for the second time,
She did.

When she called me that night,
at 3am balling her eyes out
Though skeptical,
I was there for her
She begged for a chance at forgiveness
And I gave it to her

Little did I know that
that same night
You had peeled yourself from her pillows when she asked you to leave
After all the
"kissing"
"cuddling" and
"compliments"

And yet
She.
Called.
Me.

So while I still hold resentment toward you for your vengeance toward me
I thank you for being honest with me, even with the intended malice behind your disclosure

And I shouldn't hold on to this anger any longer:

I heard the pain in your voice when you came for your shoes and found me in her bed instead

I felt your anger as you flaunted your experience with her

And I know your pain at the realization that she lied to you and it all meant very little to her

She did it to me too

Then again, this grudge may be one of the last things still connecting me to her
And maybe I'm not ready to let that go
While writing this I realized that my not seeking her back after she left me may have been an indicator that part of me didn't want her back. She was an extremely toxic person and, while that relationship taught me lessons of love, both good and bad, I can't deny how much it damaged me.
JWolfeB Jul 2014
"God why, why god? Why me? Why is life so miserable? I want to give up. Show me. Help me."

These words. The ones weighed so heavily on a hospital bed. They dragged the air down to my shoes leaving all lungs without oxygen.

The walls felt deep.

Never ending abyss of confirmed failures. Continuance of a ringing that still bleeds in my ears today. The slow beating of a flatlined life.  

This was simply the bad news on repeat. Stuttered and obliterated my brain waves that couldn't find up from down.

I've never seen a heart spread so neatly on the floor.

The pieces too small to pick up one by one. Instead we stare and observe a life not wasted across the linoleum. Watching the pieces flutter and shake in their space

So we swept the pieces into the corner. No need to keep this reality playing like elevator music. Stand by if you know what's best for ya.

These walls are for the broken hearted, the wretched, and fallen, you'll fit in just fine.

Lets push this bed out the window, it will be the first time we've been free in years. Like a bird? **** that, today we are our own.

Find wing tips fluttering fallout baby balling on a window sill. Haven't felt this way before. Outpatient freedom that will last as long as that nice pair of socks that somehow, your dryer ate and turned into lint.

I'm gonna need some therapy with that noxious cup of coffee. I can't simply continue the same beaten path.
Yesenia Acevedo Sep 2015
Matt opened his eyes when he felt the shift in the bed. He turn towards Eve frozen he watched Jake kissing what was suppose to be his. Eve laid there as Jake kissed her. With heartache accompanied by disbelief Matt regained his ability to react but instead he left the comfort of the warm bed. Just then Eve slapped Jake.


Typical, now that  she sees i'm awake she goes into defense mode. **** she always doing this, ******* with my head. God your such a ******* ****, Eve!


He left the room quickly making his way to the recliner. His head was pounding feeling the need of destruction rise with in him. Unwilling to give into the desire he settled his sights on the television. He turned it on flipping trough the channels and raising the volume wanting to drown out the sounds he knew would shortly follow from what he had witnessed. He covered his ears refusing to hear her moans penetrate his heart as Jake penetrated her.


She would, that *****. Just give herself to another man, another man who isn't me.

As the unfamiliar voice floated unclear from the man on the television to his ears he remembered the first time he had laid eyes on Eve. He was with his cousin visiting  his sister at her friends house. Matt and his cousin were entertaining with their playful rough housing.  He had his cousin in a head lock about to take him down when she stepped out from behind the bedroom door. Her eyes met his and he stood still. She flashed a smile at him as he unsuccessfully tried to do the same. He hadn't even realized his cousin had escaped his grasp. He felt the corners of his mouth begin to turn up into a smile and she turned her attention to the right of him. It was then he knew he was going down. He hit the ground hard feeling the vibration pulsing from the ground beneath him where his back made impact. He quickly rolled to his stomach rising up on his knees and hands. He looked up at Eve, she was laughing, her eyes where lit and he was in awe. Her expression change  to match the feeling of the impact of his cousin lunging himself up in the air and crashing down on his back. Matt's cheeks filled with heat as he focused in on his cousin. He pinned him down then scanned the room for Eve, but she was gone. The memory faded with a crash that startled him. He looked around the room then realized the noise had come from the television. He turned it down, way down deciding he wanted to hear if she would dare **** him in his sisters bed. He sat in the recliner balling his hand into fists waiting, listing for the faintest of sounds from Eve. Moments later he heard a distorted laugh and turned his upper body in its direction. Jake stood there staring back at him with smug amusement plastered on his face. Matt's already tense body began to flare engorged muscles. He was ready to take him when Jake sent a smile at him. Matt could feel his blood boiling, pounding, rushing through his veins reaching his heart quivering in anticipation waiting for the slightest movement in his direction. He studied Jake.


What does Eve see in this ******? He cant be that great, its only been five minutes. I'll bet she'll be on to the next guy by tomorrow, or back to Derek. Ah ****!


Images of Sam's father plagued Matt.


She ******* knows i hate Derek.

Flashes sparked in his eyes and he played the memory's tune. They had been arguing on the front porch while Matt's little brother ran circles around them.


"If you ever let Derek come over here, ill kick his ******* ***!" ,Matt informed Eve.


"Whatever Matt! He's Sams father and if he wants to see his son, he's gonna." , she countered.

Matt bounced up and down with anger. Eve dismissed his primitive dance and went inside. Matt blinked escaping the memory, fixating his eyes on Jake. Jake turned his attention down the kitchen then back at Matt. Matt narrowed his eyes when Jake dared another smile at him before going into the kitchen. The destructive desire with in him ignited and he beat his fists into the arm rests of the recliner. Shortly after Eve appeared.

"Where's your sister at?" , she asked.

"*******, you hateful *****, ******* ****." , he said in a whisper.

"What?" , she said.

Matt was over flowing with the urge to devour her with hateful slurs. He slightly turned his head to her refusing to look at her directly.

"How should i know, maybe she's with your boyfriend." ,he said.

"What's you problem Matt?" , she questioned him.

Matt took pleasure in the irritation in her voice and retaliated with, "You should know."

"Whatever Matt." , she sneered at him.

As Eve entered the kitchen Matt inhaled and swallowed his breath. He fought the desire to slap the **** out of Eve. Matt bathed in relief when he saw Eve out of the comer of his eye a few seconds later. She walked by heading to the bedroom with Sam and a bottle. She looked his way only to see his eyes piercing her with a glare. She tilted her head up at him calling him out on his **** and stuck her tongue out at him before she disappeared into the room. With that his jealousy was extinguished.
Matt, Jake and Eve intertwine as a story.
Jade Steen Sep 2013
even typing that
my throat has ***** bulging and balling up
though i'll save the explanation
for MANY future poems

she was right
yes
i'm older, and i like my name

1st grade was rough
what with the sarah's and the emily's tickled by their sweet coincidence
where's my twin?
no one else named their little girl an obscure male name in the 90s??

though moments ago
as i chose a fake name
for a place to scream into a crowd that will never acknowledge me
i found
i like my name
Brycical May 2014
THE OTHER DAY IN THE PARK I SPIED A WHITE SQUIRREL!

LATER:
We remember a past life,
later she opens her heart completely;
gratitude beats out!

I Cry.

She Cries.

THIS SCENE PLAYS OUT IN THE KITCHEN
OF THE TOUR GUIDE THROUGH THE
MATRIX, WHERE SHIPIBO PATTERNS
ALIGN THE INSIDE OF HIS LOFTY DEN.


The Tour Guide introduced us
to the timeless Oracle Pixie Swan
who paints 10 years into the future.

FOR DINNER:
we weave golden sunset light
in good convo's about the human
experience unplugging  the people.

IN THE MORNING:
we watch the gray clouds burn away
as they slowly unzip the sun unto a quiet Toronto cityscape.

We run into old friends
serendipitously pin-balling from all over the world
yet conversations continue,
with some new jokes & banter
about mistaking white squirrels & seagulls
but overall, talking the same magical words
as we are with our old soul timer families.

-----
THROUGHOUT THE DAY:
How grateful we are
to be blessed with a life of travel
& living creatively
while a few live vicariously through our
mostly unplannet planned adventures
spanning warm shores of Bali
to cold pole warm toes in Toronto.

How grateful our beings
made whole holy feel.

-----
Hooray for living, special dedication to another poet on HP, Seymour.
http://hellopoetry.com/seymour/

— The End —