The still-beating heart that stopped once,
Thumped ardently.

The rigid cold wrap of Death's embrace
withered fictiously.

A soul forever trapped in its own darkness, found light in a space that never knew dawn's caress, a vibrant love that defied oblivion's address.

I am quite unsure if the universe conspired or was inspired by our depth for each other, But I know with unwavering certainty our souls were destined to meet,

A cosmic dance orchestrated by hands unseen, forever our hearts will beat.

For Its a curse that i bare witness to and cross that I owe for letting the sheep's that are gutted for its shallow thoughts and fleeting distractions. I wish, I could unsee all that I see. I wish, I saw no pattern. I wish, the bigger picture was forever hidden and be gutted as one among the many.

Festered with Love.
Feigned by an Illusion of Trust and Deceit,

Never had a chance to clarify the Endless Desolation.
On the Twilight before a dark night,
I lost my light to a starking sight.

The love that Festered with the light is long lost in the oceans of the night, The sight of the shimmering light, dwindled in the mighty ruth of the dark.

I waited so long to see you happy.

I am truly happy, to see you smile.
I hope you finally found someone who is worthy of you.

For whatever we had was worth, I know I truly lost something that was real.

And i logged out of the account i was stalking you with for so long.

Walks and strides all around an'd amidst the crowded streets and lonely roads where she will never be seen.

She came unasked she disappeared in a stead.

The dread fell in love with the damsel,
        The devil frowned, The angels envied.
Hate and jealousy insued.
         Fear and Fate dispute.
Time and tide did rescue.
         Love died, tears dried and the Sun Shined.
Dread triumphed.
         Angels fell, the Devil died.
The dead heart dubbed at last.

Now I have to remember longer than I have known you for.

Dear God,
I am sorry, for hurting myself.
I am sorry, for blaming her for all my sorrows.
I am sorry, that I couldn't find the strength in myself to let go her,
To bare the sight of her being in love with someone else.

I realized that its okay that she is not in love me. I realized its good that she is in love with someone who makes her happy.
I am truly happy that she is happy.

I know you'll have something in store for me, I am gonna forgive myself for all the pain that, I put myself through and I am gonna do what makes me happy. I am not at peace now but I am sure I will find it someday.

PS.
A withered Soul.

And the prophecy calls me a heretic for claiming that the wider vision puts the hoax as a pursuit of distraction for herds to follow and while distractions, distractions are the ones that keeps the inner animals at bay, for all we are, are animals with distractions. Claiming to follow the noblest of all paths that are laid bare, before eyes, Eyes that lack vision, eyes that don't see beyond.

For Its a curse that i bare witness to and cross that I owe for letting the sheep's that are gutted for its shallow thoughts and fleeting distractions. I wish, I could unsee all that I see. I wish, I saw no pattern. I wish, the bigger picture was forever hidden and be gutted as one among the many.

Why do you do what you do and if that why justifies the very reason for your existence from yours and truly just your perspective among the grand scheme of randomly existing things accross an immeasurable universe whose secrets bare no witness, then we'll there's nothing more that anyone could say dear friend, you are already at peace.

The Construct is Malleable.
The absolutes are undefined.

What we reap isn't what we sow.
Nothing is True.

For everything is right in its own accord.

Everything you touch,
Everything you feel,
Takes a toll on your Soul.

Weep and wither on the edge or the crevice
The Deep and Dark devoids all the same.

Cry and Love all you want but in the End
All you get is all you Take.

Grief of a love lost, has no timeline sometimes its just you with yourself fighting to find solace between the raging momentary whisks of anger and pointless sedition of your soul that irks to find the once long lost peace, You wish it has an end and rebel against the never ending !

For my soul that burns in thy Decree
For thy gates of Hell that awaits my arrival
For the song of hades that drags me to hell'
For the wrath of Amun that Plunders my Veins
For the spree of Ra that burns my soul,
For all of me that wanted to reach the field of Reeds,
Faded Away ..!
Away with her smile

Somehow I knew you were gonna break me, bad!!
yet my heart never had the heart to choose otherwise.

I am caught in the Cadence of your breath.
Your Decadence melts my soul as if It was yours.

I wondered as prisoner of this soulless grave roaming around on the wake of light and falling down on the drapes of night.

Will I ever feel the warmth of your breath or the gaze of your eyes which is more than enough to dream of for a thousand lifetimes, more than enough to be your prisoner for eons and ages to come..?

You ripped me off the very thing
I lacked and left me here to ponder over
all the things that we could have been.

The world paints over whatever it wants over you like you are an empty canvas, Its upto you to stay vigilant and selectively absorb what you need rather than what you're forced with.

Find your direction, find your sense of perfection redefine yourself to be the art you dream of.

In the process of finding ourselves
We lost each other.

No matter how much We want to go back,
We lost the one thing that mattered the most.

and Now there's nothing left to go back to.

Had I had heart to love me, the way I loved you, I would have never been so stupid, vulnerable and misled, enough to let my heart be broken and  my soul be condemned to shatter everytime I hear your name.

Would you look into my soul and sell me a savouring lie?

Could you break my heart that's shattered beyond a thousand pieces?

Should you stoop into the depths of my soul,you ll never find your way back.

What did I do to bring forth such an unbound agony and unending pain?

I cared.

I don't know what i am feeling
But there sure is lots of it that reeks of your cologne and hairspray.

Its not love on which the strongest Foundations are built,
Its the decency of Merciful Lies,
That are buried deep in our hearts,
Bound! never to peek or pry through our meek
Withered Hearts.

From floating adrift in a salt lake
To riding alone into the sunset  

Every corner of this gruesome world reminds me of you, I know you are not mine and you'll never be.

And maybe its time, I end this lonesome charade and bury my broken heart.

Most People that say that they understand Your pain.
Do you really understand?

Do You know what its like to be waiting for a call that will never come?

Do you know how to know the end and yet hope for something better?

Do you know what its like to be left alone writhing on all the words that was never said and never heard?

Do you know how smooth her skin was when she held my hand?

Do you know how she made my chaotic world so calm and unburdened?

Do you know how far her absence wreaked havoc in my world  and let me delve right beyond the edge of the abyss that I wish I never knew?

Love is the most hideous of all
that you'll ever feel,

You wont even realize its there when you have time with that one person and

all of a sudden

you feel all this weight pulling your heart down at once knowing that your time with them has come to an end.

One of the hardest things you will ever have to do in life is to love someone so much unconditionally and still walk away from them since thats whats best for both of you.

People quarrel about being
Single and committed like they know what love is.

Love is something that you can only understand through grief,

It is a discovery of voids in yourself, voids that vortexes into your soul shattering all you've ever felt,

You ll never know what love is until you lose someone you love.

In the process of Failing to notice
That I was Falling in love with You,

My mind made you a part of me and
Now that I realize, I came so far and Loved so long,

I don't even remember what you were like,
All I have left is a figment of my stupid imagination and That!,
That doesn't even amount to a fraction of what you are.

You preached love to a heartless being and you clipped its wings right when it wanted to fly with you.
Are you the angel that I deserve, dream and desolately mourn along till the end of my days?

What I lost is something that can never be replaced.

🙂
Was any of it even real?
🙂
Does it really matter?
🙂
I dont know, it was
atleast for me it did.

Time Froze
The Wind Stopped
The Rustling leaves
The Whispering Trees
Their Falling Dews all stood still.

In the Second Floor Corridor.
I froze, I still am frozen right back on 28th of October 2017
The day I set my eyes on you,
You, You who looked at me as if i was more,
You, you thought i mattered and
All of a sudden across the 18 years of my life in this world,
My Life, It didn't feel so Meaningless.

And I froze right there in that moment,
I am not out of it, I Never think I will ever be.
That one Ferroro Roacher,
In That one glimpse,
In That one Moment,
With our eyes set upon eachother,
as if we were the only people in the world,
I froze,
I froze and I am still there.

I am lost in the vortex of space and
You are the Void,
That chokes and wraps and reeks me around until I break.

You love me in my dreams and haunt me in my days and
yet All my hope remains awake.

I am dead to one and known to none
for my love and hate to you will remain adrift
bleeding in the void of space.

Sometimes We see things,
Things that are so beautiful ,
For which our soul craves and
every fibre of our being pushes us towards it and
yet deep down you know ,
you know
Its not yours and it was never meant to be.

She said

You can be a person with good intentions
You can be a person with generosity
You can be a person with Kindness
You can be a person with always others best interests at heart
but none of it really matters people see what they choose to see, and theres nothing you can do about it

When you lose someone, people say they don't probably deserve you or they are not worth it and stuff,

But deep down you know they were worth selling your soul.

No matter how lame or self-destructive the aspects of love are, we still would choose to feel the pain, the rage, the anger, the love, the kisses, the slightest touch on our waist and cheeks, the endless stare into the eyes filled with love that reflects the depth of an abyssal gorge, the never-ending feeling of wants and being wanted, because what more is there that sets us apart from the non-living elements of this world.

What is the point of living?
What is the purpose of life?

If death was the ultimatum then what's the point of being born?

Maybe we are too small to speculate it.

Maybe we will get extinct before we know it.

Sometimes it all boils down to
knowing when
to give up.

Sober up pal you ain't living forever.

I am Awake all night wondering what if  we never did what we did so we never got where we are.

What i had wasn't perfect,
It never had to be.
I just loved the way it was,
For it laid perfect on its own way.

moments wrapped in romance that end with bitter sunrises and goodbyes
moments so fragile and rare that i wonder
if they would have the same taste if not such a delicacy
but i'd still devour you as i lay here and recall years of wavering emotions
suppressed desires and volcanic explosions that retreat into dormancy
i wonder could we ever flow together
or are we two twin souls finding each other in the wrong lifetime

Losing what you never had
Might still be the worst thing that could ever happen,

Cause once you lose what you never had,
you never stop contemplating " what if you had it ",

and though you know what your heart wants,
You ll never do it because it wasnt yours to begin with.

From being Barney to becoming Ted i fell for the Robin i could never have.

She said she wanted
to see the stars
while holding the
hand of someone
who loves her.

Yet i lay here
staring
into
the abysal plane
of the universe,
wondering
if she would ever realize
that my arms are
hanging forever open
just for her to clasp.