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Jun 2020 · 79
like the moon
Emily Jun 2020
I replay in my mind
the feel of your lips against the skin of my back
the softness of your beard on my legs

I hear in my head
your tired but hungry voice
the words ‘i love you’
sweetly in my ear
my heart feels so full
like the moon

but more than these physical sensations
are the feelings of rapture and safety
when you look at me with love and deep care
your admiration for me washes over me
my soul is so peaceful
now I sit back and wonder, did that disappear?

losing you is my greatest fear
for jkm
Jan 2018 · 1.3k
you thought wrong
Emily Jan 2018
You think you’ve met someone different
But you’ve not

You think you’ve met someone genuine
But you’ve not

Smooth words, care in his tone
Texts you back, picks up the phone

He’s deep and sincere
Loves his family, has no fear

You think you’ve met someone different
But you’ve not

He calls you every night
You hear his voice for hours
He tells you he wants you as his wife
Assures you this world is “ours”

You think you’ve met someone different
But you’ve not

Days, weeks, months pass by
Slight changes take place
You start thinking it’s a lie
Calls are less frequent
Affectionate words no longer spoken
He’s met you, he’s felt you
Does he know that you’re broken?

What did you do to deserve such a phony
You thought he was different
You thought you met someone genuine
But you didn’t
You thought wrong
And now another piece of you is missing
people are still as fake as ever
May 2017 · 1.2k
talk to me
Emily May 2017
why won't you talk to me
don't you miss the excitement i gave you
i made you feel so good
right through the phone
your desire burned deep
like you finally made it home
you wanted me bad
you wanted me good
you wanted me anyway i came
just like all bad boys should

why won't you talk to me
don't you miss the excitement i gave you
you felt passion once more
love entered through your chest
you could breathe easily again
alive from being suppressed
yearning ran through your veins
just like the sweat ran down your temple
my lips the subject of your fantasy
real enough to make you tremble

why won't you talk to me
don't you miss the excitement i gave you
May 2017 · 847
Emily May 2017
There's something comforting
In the pitter patter of the rain
The deep rumbles of thunder
Flashes of lightning through the window
Washing away the problems of yesterday
May 2017 · 361
Emily May 2017
How can you miss someone
You've never even met
I've never held your hand
But I miss feeling it in my palm
I've never tasted your lips
But I miss your soft kisses
I've never sensed your breath
But I miss the feel of it on my neck
I've never felt your teeth
But I miss them grazing against my shoulders
I've never had your love
But I feel empty without it
I've never heard your voice
But I keep longing to hear it
I've never touched your hair
But my fingers wish to run through it
I've never had you next to me
But I miss you
May 2017 · 324
What I Can Do
Emily May 2017
My desire for you burns like the sun hitting my skin on a hot day
My thoughts about you never cease, always on like a loop in my head
I think about your lips and how they will feel against my skin
I think about the hair on your face brushing up against my neck
I think about the taste of your tongue entering my soft mouth
I want to feel your warmth
Your body around me
My body around you
I want to grip your heart in my hands and slowly heal you with every kiss
I want to touch all the tender parts of you until you are whole again
I can be your source of comfort
Your soul can fit with mine
It's hard to face the truth
But let me be the one to show you reality
I can be what you truly desire
I will be what you had, but so much more
I will be what you need on every night and every day
You will look into my eyes and know I'll never stray
I want to restore what is broken in you
So give me the chance to show
What I can do
May 2017 · 1.0k
Emily May 2017
Why must I get myself stuck
I'm short for air
I can hardly breathe
My heart races fast
I think about my past
It's all too familiar

I pull the moon from the sky
And hand it to you
I take your broken heart
I mend all the pieces
Rid you of your diseases
Where does that leave me

I'm still in the dark
Grasping for air
Suffocating in my own house
Depleted of all my energy
Void of any memory
I am alone

Nothing is what I am
Not to you
Not to her
I'm just a crutch
Until you're on your feet again
I'm on my knees
Washing your feet
You walk away
Leaving me *****

No, I'm not worthy
Mar 2017 · 851
new air
Emily Mar 2017
meeting you
is like breathing
new air

your soul
your passion
your care

my stomach jumps
my heart flutters
my eyes fill with tears

i feel it again

but this time
it is raw

i want you
not only in my head
not only in my heart

but in my soul
in my bed
in my arms

i want to breathe
this new air
Waiting for God to bring me a lover.
May 2016 · 707
Emily May 2016
I feel such a deep connection
Such spiritual emotion
When I'm with you
I want to feel your kiss
And share my passion
For how I feel about you
No one in this world
Affects me quite like you do
Not in this moment
Not in the past
I want you to be my future
I want to be your woman
Your source of comfort
I want to be your lover
Your source of pleasure
I want to be by your side
Your source of encouragement
I want to look you in the eye
And have you see my devotion
You'll feel my love with my embrace
You'll feel my warmth
With the grace of my lips
I want to feel you next to me
Feel your body against mine
Exchange my feelings for you
Every moment in time
You are a man
And I'm ready to be yours
Tell me what to do
I want to submit to you
You're my man
Don't let me slip through
Your fingers
May 2016 · 390
Emily May 2016
there is a chemical connection
between our souls
i can feel the passion
when you say my name
i can sense the potency
in your urge for me
i can feel the desire in my gut
i've never felt this way
it's you i want
i imagine us
i imagine you
being mine
being true
the things you say
the words you use
how has it taken me
this long to find you
where have you been
and why have you gone
didn't you feel
what i felt all along
i can be the one to show you
what a real woman is
i can be the one to commit to you
and make you feel bliss
i will take the moon from the dark sky
and put it in your hands
you have the power over me
it's this space i can't stand
come back
i will show you the way
you are the alpha
i am the omega
you have all the power
i am yours to keep
we don't know where we end
or begin
we only know that we belong
May 2016 · 592
the one
Emily May 2016
your personality came through the screen
your kind heart was potent
though you couldn't be seen
i felt you coursing through my veins
just after one day
this immediate connection
felt like our own version of heaven
were you the one?
i like him so much
Feb 2016 · 653
Emily Feb 2016
when i met you
i judged you
and for that
i'm sorry
it was wrong of me
because God made you special
you bring me joy
you share jokes
you give me moments
of freedom
when we talk
i feel free
free from the pain i've felt
free from the twisted sadness
i want to be close friends
i know this is just the beginning
but i really care about you
i enjoy my time with you
and how much we have in common
i'm so thankful that i met you
you're such a sweet person
i hope you think the same about me
because right now
you're the only good thing in my life
you're the only person that makes me smile
i find myself wanting to talk to you more and more
thank you for waking up my soul
thank you for giving me something to look forward to
thank you for being my new friend
Jan 2016 · 718
Long nap
Emily Jan 2016
I can feel myself fade away
My body gets weak
I can't even see anymore
Not sure if it's the tears in my eyes
Or the fact that my body may shut down
I called a suicide hotline
But I just hung up
Nothing matters to me now
Except my dog
This doesn't make sense
But I'm scared to leave my dog
I'm super hazy
Haven't eaten
Took a shot
I have work later
Who knows if I'll be awake to go
I don't want to go
I just want to stay under the covers
If that means dying
Then that's what I'll do
Why should I care
to keep a promise for you
You don't care
You think I'm bad
You think I lie
But all I did was give you my heart
I would rather die
Than live like this
I wiped a tear
And another one came down
And another one
I closed my eyes shut
And a few more poured out
This doesn't even make sense
But I think it's the meds
Taking a long nap
And hope it never ends
Nov 2015 · 742
I want this
Emily Nov 2015
I'm trying to compensate
For the void in my mind
With other people
With other pastimes

Nothing is very satisfying
Especially after I've crossed the line
Now I really wish
That I could just rewind

I wouldn't take advantage
Of the moments we shared
The long nights together
When our eyes would stare

Into each other
I could see your soul
Now I am empty
With nowhere to go

I wish I hadn't given up
I wish I gave us a better chance
Everything seems ruined now
Slim odds of romance

I don't think we can come back
Not from this damage
It's all my fault, I've done it to us
It was too hard to manage

I'm sorry for how I've treated you
Nothing can take back the things I've said
I'm sorry for how I gave up on you
Nothing can take back the things I did

Despite my tragic flaws
You still treat me as if I'm the best
You love me unconditionally
Every day I am blessed

What did I ever do to deserve you
I ask myself why I don't try harder
Why I'm not on my knees begging
Why didn't I act smarter

All these questions
Swimming in my head
I know I want this to last
To clean up all I've bled
Nov 2015 · 927
hope lingers
Emily Nov 2015
i have a hope that we can make it through
i am trying to decide why i would ever mistreat you

i am sorry for the way that i've acted
for always being confused and distracted

i can't undo the mistakes i have made
i just don't want this love to fade

it scares me to think of a life without the one
that would be like the earth and no sun

i feel things for you that i don't quite understand
i feel like i know you like the back of my hand

but at the same time i don't
i've never known you and probably won't

it's saddening to think we live so far apart
we deserve so much more for the longing in our heart

living my life day by day, doing the same
i just want to wake up with you and feel no shame

i don't want to be embarrassed that my love is for you
everyone makes me feel like it's wrong to do

maybe nobody will ever see what i see
but at least your love makes me feel free

i feel myself, i am not ashamed
with you, the person i was meant to be, i became

thank you for giving me myself
thank you for your love, and yourself

i have a hope that we can make it through
i have a feeling i will always love you
Nov 2015 · 730
hold my hand
Emily Nov 2015
it's not an unfamiliar touch
but it makes my body tingle
when the slightest brush of your finger
graces the top of my hand
i get a cooling sensation down my back
a smile wide across my face
and butterflies dancing in my stomach

your smile is worthy of a prize
it stems right from the lightness of your eyes
i think it stands out as more than precious
something rare
not often come by
the warmth of your smile
along with the specialness of your touch
is all part of the drawing factor
that brings me closer to you

i want to know you differently now
i want to know you better
i want to be an adult with you
i want to explore all that is your mind
and all that is your body
i want you to explore me just as equally

i love when you look at me
deep into my soul
i wish that i were around you all the time
never having a moment so dull
hold my hand
and tell me you love me
call me baby
tell me our deep thoughts
take me out for talks and long walks
play my favorite movie
and sing my favorite song

i want all that is special in your mind
just please hold my hand
that will be infinitely enough from you
to my special someone that i love so much.
Nov 2015 · 415
this is true
Emily Nov 2015
you are beautiful,
and kind
there is nothing
that i would change
you gave me peace
you gave me security
you made me happy when i was at my worst
you gave me purpose
made me feel beautiful
made me feel wanted
and adored
it's not that i don't love you
because i love you very much
from afar
but my heart doesn't want to continue
it is tired of the struggle
it is tired of trying to find all the right
in the midst of all this wrong
i am dragging you down
deep into my confusion
into my loneliness
into my dissatisfaction
you deserve so much better
than what i am offering you
i can't continue to short change you
i am not made for you
not right now
you are my soul mate
you are my first
you always will be
i will never stop loving you
never cease to pray for you
you are the highest of the high
and the most beautiful person i have ever known
don't you ever think for a second that it is a lie
because this is the truth
i love you
i will always be here for you
i know you will be happy in this life
because God knows how much you deserve it
and He will make sure that you get it
break ups are difficult and anything but ideal, but sometimes they are necessary.
Oct 2015 · 1.2k
Emily Oct 2015
something about the rain
the gloom and doom sensation
yet it feels like relief
all your emotions and sorrows
pouring out and coming down
banging ******* the driveway
window cracked open
the repetitive sound in your ear
nothing to do but listen and think
the rain brings long thoughts
frustrating, sad, anxious
but at the same time, freeing
parts of me are washed away
parts i wish that weren't there
a new chapter can begin after the rain
the smell, the feel, the look
out of dark clouds comes light
you take a deep breathe
Oct 2015 · 452
Emily Oct 2015
what are you supposed to do
when you get that feeling in your stomach
you're gonna be sick
your heart drops
no air in your lungs
your heart stops

what are you supposed to do
when you get the feeling in your stomach
the one that's terrible
the one that makes you feel like your world is crumbling
the blurry confusion
the inability to know how you feel
when your sanity turns into delusion

what are you supposed to do
when the feeling in your stomach
is caused by wanting it all to end
by wanting to give up
what are you supposed to do
when the same feeling occurs
because you are scared of it ending
you don't want to lose it

the feeling in my stomach
it makes me sick
i am so conflicted
it's like an evil trick

wishing i could shut off my mind
wishing my stomach could feel fine
Sep 2015 · 638
back in time
Emily Sep 2015
Sometimes you wish you could just go back
Take away all the pain you caused
What you did
And what you said
The mistakes you've made
And the person you became
Sometimes you don't see what's in front of you
You don't realize the importance
Then it's all gone
As if you just flinched
Your life passes before your eyes
But you're not on the brink of dying
You're on the brink of life
You're now aware of how you have nothing
You let it go to waste
All because you were just bluffing
You were fake and you were mean
You ruined people's lives
You acted obscene
You deserve to be lonely
Deserve to have nobody
What goes around
Comes around
And you can't take it back
You can't go back in time
How I feel about myself
Sep 2015 · 313
Emily Sep 2015
I hate you for destroying everything I had
I hate you for always holding me back
I hate you for the times when you'd mess with my head
I hate you for all the damage that you did
I hate how you watched as I wasted away my life
I hate how everything you ever said was a lie
I hate how even today, the affect of you still remains
I hate how for all my problems, you're the one to blame
I hate the stolen hours, days, weeks
I hate how you turned me into a freak
I will never forgive you for what you did
Not just to me but even to little kids
I hate you
Aug 2015 · 483
Emily Aug 2015
I can't help but cry
I think about the distance
And the next time I'll see you again
I don't know the exact date or time
But my lips miss you
Like my lungs need air after being under water for so long
I'm suffocating without the scent of you
Without the taste of you
I want to hear your voice
Not just over the phone
But whispering in my ear
I miss the warmth of your breath
And the smell of your hair
Life without you is so dull
There are no colors around me
Only worry and fear are the emotions I feel
I want to be with you
I have to be with you
5,000 miles with an ocean between us
I am afraid of a future without you
I'm confused and puzzled as to why this had to be so complicated
Why us
Why were we cursed with the terrible luck of finding love in someone who lives so far away
It almost seems impossible to maintain
But what's even more impossible is living a life without you
It's unimaginable
I would wait forever
Just for a single day with you
i love you
Aug 2015 · 478
I miss you
Emily Aug 2015
Missing you stings my heart
Now I know why they say love hurts
Loving you is the easiest thing
And the hardest thing
I've ever had to do
I know you're the one for me
Because with you,
I am able to breathe better, easier
I don't get choked up on life anymore
Rather just choked up when I think of all the cheesy things I think about you
Sappy, yet true
If my passion for you was to be a color
It would be gold
Bright like the sun
Everlasting and precious
It is easy to love you because you make me feel at home
It is hard to love you because you are so far from home
I want to make a new home with you
I miss you
my beautiful Lauren
Jun 2015 · 451
Emily Jun 2015
The good thing about boyfriends
Is that they have no emotions

All these girls are so high strung
Makes me feel like they're less fun

So many points of view
So many arguments
All I want is to just chill
No more backhanded compliments

Guys kick back, relax
It's not a big deal
Let's kiss, laugh, drink
Loving what we feel

Do you want love
Or do you want passion
Do they always come together
Or just in small rations

Do you want drama
Do you want sensitivity
Do you want strength
Do you want security

A personal dilemma
When trying to discover
What you want in life
What you will uncover
Jun 2015 · 355
all you have is you
Emily Jun 2015
No more sparks
No more butterflies
No more curiosity
Just a bunch of lies

Love is fleeting
Respect is gone
There is nothing left
It's all gone wrong

It's a sad to remember
How you used to feel
You wanted her so badly
Now nothing is real

You want it to last
You try your hardest too
You can't replace the love lost
All you have is you

Nothing more
Nothing less
Just you by yourself
With a bunch of regret
Jun 2015 · 595
get away
Emily Jun 2015
Sick of the traps
Sick of the questions
Get away from me
If you think I'm a fake
This is all I can take
Get away from me
If all you do is question me
Clearly we weren't meant to be
I am done with this mess
It doesn't even make sense
Not even a little bit
Everything is wrong
We never get along
As much as I want this to work
It just keeps getting worse
Please understand me when I say
I'll always love you
But please get away
Jun 2015 · 294
love seems lost
Emily Jun 2015
Spending your love on something and it goes unnoticed
You're pushed to the edge and then start to lose focus
You don't know where things might have gone wrong
Because all along you thought you were strong
You try your hardest, you do your best
But all you're left with is pure unrest
You begin to feel worthless
You are ridden with stress
Love seems lost now
So take back your vow
It doesn't mean anything anymore
May 2015 · 676
further away
Emily May 2015
I hate every part of me
I hate going through life that way
I stay awake in the middle of the night
While everyone else is asleep
I sit in a puddle of self loathing

I have no desire to speak to anyone
No desire for that at all
I'm a prison in my own home
I don't want them and they don't want me
What a terrible life to lead

Everyone is finding fault with me
They're always so disappointed
Makes me feel worthless and stupid
Why should I try any longer
I gave up a long time ago

My blood is my refuge
If anybody knows my pain is real, it is me
It is never something they can take away
It is all that I have, the scars and the darkness
Without it, I'm lonely

Don't sit there and tell me that I'm fine
That I have it made
None of that means **** when I'm holding this blade
Your pointless words and hateful glares
The most perfect triggers

Thank you for bringing me closer to my pain
And further away from you
Mar 2015 · 707
Emily Mar 2015
I'm disgusting from the inside out
Tormented by something that won't get out
A monster since my childhood
Crippling me with a disease
Convincing me that I'll always be ugly
Stuffing my face with everything imaginable
I'm growing by the minute
The fat comes on and adds to the filth
I'm so disgusting
It's something I'm aware of but I just can't fix
Something I always ignore
I'm used to all its tricks
I'll never get better
This monster will always have a home in me
For every step forward
I take three steps back
I can never win
I will always hate myself
I will always be this way
Gross, fat, and ruined
Feb 2015 · 1.5k
my desire
Emily Feb 2015
i want to be able to touch you
and feel special
i want to be able to touch you
and feel like i'm the only one
i want to be able to touch you
knowing that your body has been preserved
i want to be able to touch you
knowing that you have saved yourself for the right person
i want to be able to touch you
and feel like my hands were the first hands on you
i want to be able to touch you
and make you feel pleasure that you haven't felt before

*but i guess i can't
i wish
Feb 2015 · 1.9k
don't give your body away
Emily Feb 2015
there are a few sacred things in this life
one of them is our body
it is not supposed to be used or abused
by those that don't know us or love us
it is not supposed to be touched
unless it is done so in love
in care and affection
and with the utmost respect

don't give your body away
without thinking
don't give your body away
unless you're mature
both mentally and physically
enough to understand what happens with your body
what happens when you experience the feelings that are associated with ***
unless you're old enough to understand love
understand that you shouldn't give your body away for just any reason

give your body away
if you wish to share love and intimacy
with someone who loves you unconditionally
with someone who has fallen in love with not just your body
but with your heart and with your soul
love should always come first
not really a poem i guess.
Jan 2015 · 624
empty space
Emily Jan 2015
I roll over in this large bed
Only to see that the space next to me is empty
It is where you should be laying
It is where I should be able to look into your eyes
And show you how much I adore you with just one glance
But instead I catch myself staring at the emptiness
Trying to understand how my one true lover lives across the Atlantic
My vision starts to become blurry
My emotions start to run together
And I am left feeling numb and hollow
How I wish I could reach my hand out
And feel your body next to mine
How I wish to feel the warmth of your breath as we speak in close proximity
And as I imagine these things, I feel happiness for a split second
But no, my world is shattered and my heart breaks
As the sudden realization hits that you are not here
I cannot see you, feel you, or hear you
You are elsewhere
And I am here
Broken from our separation
Longing for the next time I see your face
Dreaming of the day that I roll over
And see my love lying next to me
Instead of this empty space
i miss you
Jan 2015 · 1.1k
Emily Jan 2015
Pain is the feeling I experience
When she cries for me
Yearning for me to touch her again
I feel it too
The longing and the need to have her in my arms just one last time
Sadness comes over me when I see her brows furrow
Getting ready to cry
I feel so helpless being all these miles away
The memories we made carry me through every single day
And although this isn't the end
The distance between us is no easy obstacle to overcome
Our love is strong
The want is there
The need is shared between us
I just pray that the days go by quickly
And the nights pass easily
Until the next time that we meet again
I love you, my darling
Jan 2015 · 1.4k
Emily Jan 2015
it's a scary thing
to love someone more than you love yourself
to love someone more than you love anything

it's a scary thing
to need someone like you need oxygen
to need them so bad or else you'll suffocate

it's a scary thing
to want someone with every bone in your body
and you feel it in your muscles
you've come undone
you have to have them

it's a scary thing to devote every piece of yourself
and to commit every part of your life
to one person

you can't help it, though
that is love
love works that way
it's scary

it's scary because at any moment
things could change
and your whole world could come crashing down
your whole life will seem over
you will feel doomed
like you can never move on
you're suddenly out of breath
gasping for air
and that sickly feeling comes over you

i cannot live without you
please don't make me
it would be the end of me
more of just a stream of consciousness than anything else
Jan 2015 · 384
rest in peace
Emily Jan 2015
Sometimes I wish you were looking down upon me
Sometimes I hope you can hear me
And see all of your friends and family
Missing you, remembering you
But I know that you cannot
For you are in a beautiful place
That knows no sorrow or sadness
A place that is not of this world
You are where you have always belonged
In a place where you deserve to be
A place full of happiness and peace
You know not of this earthly world
Full of sin, lies, and disorder
You're where there are golden streets
And pearly gates
With the beautiful sound of trumpets
And however much I wish you were here
Or could at least see me
It makes me happy that you've found your heaven
And the next time I look into your eyes
We will both have wings
in loving memory of my dear friend of 13 years, who died three years ago of a drug overdose
Jan 2015 · 465
miss you
Emily Jan 2015
The feel of your touch
Your soft warm skin
The feel of your kiss
So sweet and passionate
The feel of our bodies together
Are all something I miss
God I miss you
Jan 2015 · 377
Slipped Moments
Emily Jan 2015
The sweetest ******* earth
That is you
I regret so much everything I did not do
Everything I continue to neglect
Like looking into your eyes a little longer
Telling you how much I love you one more time, and a little nicer
Smiling at you as I look into your eyes
I'm foolish and stupid for ever letting go of your hand
Because now that I am without you
All of my mistakes is all I think about
I hate myself for letting moments slip by
Where I felt tired or lazy and let go of you
I hate how I've been rude to you
My lack of sensitivity towards you I despise
You only deserve the best
You're so sweet and so kind
You love me so much
And I love you so much more
But my natural flaws hold me back from being the best companion
I adore you with all my heart
I miss you with every bone in my body
I long for you so much
I need you more than I express to you
I just wish I had all those moments back
Moments spent arguing with you or yelling at you
Moments spent being bitter and creating tension
Moments when I should have been smiling with you
Moments when I should have been loving you and reassuring you
I can't let you go
I won't, I never will
But I promise I will get better
I promise I'll be the perfect person for you
Just like you're the perfect person for me
I'll never let another moment slip
Time is precious
But not as precious as you
I love you deeply, forever
I promise
I'm so sorry, baby
Jan 2015 · 500
my love
Emily Jan 2015
through all the ups and downs
the joy and the pain
there is no greater happiness
than finding my soul in you
the essence of everything you are
gives me a faith and a belief
that i have never known before
a belief in the good
a faith in a happy future
i've grown to become so attached to you
not by habit or conditioning
but by true commitment
true compatibility
true companionship
i've never seen someone as beautiful as you
with a heart so big
and a love so strong
i'm so blessed to be the one you give yourself to
the one you want to share your life with
i'm so blessed to be on the other end
of the love you extend
you're my everything
my angel
you make my life glow
you give me everything i've ever wanted
i could never want more
with you right by my side
except for one more kiss
one more look
one more embrace
one more soft touch
one more smile
i always want more of you
Jan 2015 · 470
i miss you
Emily Jan 2015
in a constant state of melancholy
i miss you constantly
suffocating from
the lack of the one i love  
conditioned to want you
conditioned to need you
experiencing a painful withdrawal
just take me back
Jan 2015 · 277
the reason
Emily Jan 2015
trying to find a remedy
for the pain that i feel inside
i miss you
and it creates a hole in my heart
filling the void
with things that make it even worse
i just need you
need you by my side again
it's hard to keep the faith
when the one you want is a world away
but she's the reason i'm alive
the reason i am ever happy
so i'll keep going
smiling for her
it's what she deserves
been a while since i've posted and yeah i think my writing *****, especially these days but thought i would post a little something. Happy New Year.
Jan 2015 · 794
waiting for the days
Emily Jan 2015
we are apart for the moment
but now that i've had a taste
my taste buds are shot
i have a taste for nothing else
the fact that you're not around
is brutally killing me
i love you so much
i can barely breathe
i'm lonely without you
i'm worried about everything
you're the only person that can calm me
you're the only one with the power to make me feel better
i wish so desperately to look at you again
to feel my arms around you
to kiss your lips softly
to hold your hand
to hear your laugh
to watch you eat
i want to wake up next to you again
the days we shared together
keep replaying in my head
i'm living for the days we had
and waiting for the days we will share again
you're my everything
no matter what the distance
i will always love you
Nov 2014 · 1.5k
our future
Emily Nov 2014
these night are lonely without you, my love
but i possess no fear
i know my life will be full of nights with you
the nights where we stay up for hours talking
the nights that lead their way into dawn
when the sun begins to come up
peaking through our window
as i tenderly kiss you
as we softly fall asleep
lying in each other's warm embrace
the nights full of passion and excitement
the eagerness to please one another
the deep kisses, the stares full of longing
the moans, the breaths
the ultimate pleasure in our hands
where nothing could possibly stop our love from blossoming
and the nights that we call early
the nights where we are too tired to even speak
but never too tired to softly kiss
subtly caress each other
admire each other with just our hands and lips
the nights where we fall asleep within moments
only because we are at such peace with each other
next to the one we love
for eternity
for always
thank you, my love
for a future full of endless nights
tonight i look forward to you
to them
to forever
thank you all for the reception my last poem received. i hope this one reaches you all in the same way.
Nov 2014 · 2.7k
Emily Nov 2014
the love i have for her
is unlike anything i've ever felt
i care more for her than i even do myself
she is so fragile, so weak
yet at the same time
her strength is inspiring
her face is a wonder
her eyes a beautiful, blue hue
i could stare into them forever
for there is no competing view
i love the way her voice sounds
it's so sweet and pure
when she tells me she loves me
when she calls me baby
it is my undoing
i fall in love with her all over again
kissing her soft and supple lips
is my most favorite task
they're plump and pink
her tongue is so sweet
there is something so precious
about her very essence
i can't quite pinpoint what it is
but the more i am with her
the more that i see her
i realize it is because
being precious is inherently part of her
there is no other way for her to be
that's just how she is naturally
i can't believe that she is mine
she is sweeter than the finest dessert wine
if i am completely deserving
i do not know
but i will fight for her always
i will never let her go
sorry i haven't written in a while. i have been busy and haven't believed in my writing like i used to. but i thought i would post this. my girlfriend deserves more poetry written about her. hope y'all like it.
Oct 2014 · 447
you're not a father
Emily Oct 2014
I'll never forget how you saw your daughter's blood and told her she should have cut deeper

I'll never forget how you became aware of my mental illness and instead of trying to help me, you got angry and left me

I'll never forget the way you looked at me while I was crying, as if I were crazy and out of my mind

Maybe I am, but as my father, as the one who watched me grow, wouldn't you want to help me reach the aspirations you claim to have for me

I'll never forget the way you left and cut me off, the way you acted cheaply and said you would no longer help me

For as long as I live, I'll remember this abandonment and how you made me feel more worthless than I ever have before

And next time I pick up the blade and slide it across my skin, I'll see the blood, the blood we share, and remember your harsh words
Sep 2014 · 378
Once So Sure
Emily Sep 2014
My body is weak
My eyes wish to close
My limbs feel sore
My desire to sleep forever
Outweighs anything else
I had in mind for my life
If only I could stop the madness inside my head
If only I could have one moment of peace
Then maybe I would get the rest I need
My body battles my brain
Tossing and turning
Wishing it would just shut up
"Stop, please ******* stop"
Sleepless nights and thoughts of rage
It's like I'm stuck in a cage
And someone threw away the key
I'm left alone with only me
Insanity strikes
I'm starting to think things that don't make sense
I've become this unrecognizable being
Who am I
What am I doing here
What is my purpose
Once a girl so sure of herself
Now all I think about is death
Sep 2014 · 348
Another Heartbreak
Emily Sep 2014
Tired of waiting
Exhausted from the constant bickering
This isn't how love should be
Love is about sacrifice
But up to what point?
Are we supposed to stop our lives
And give up everything we have
Or is that too much?
I'm confused at what to do at this point
Will it all be worth it?
And if it isn't
How is it going to leave me in the end?
I'm already damaged enough
I don't think I could survive
Heartbreak again
Sep 2014 · 417
Unanswered Prayers
Emily Sep 2014
I'm sick of the unknown
I'm dying from this occasional tension
It doesn't even feel like we're close
And all I manage to feel is apprehension
I'm expecting the worst
And praying for the best
But as I've learned in the past
Not all prayers are answered
Sep 2014 · 699
my counterpart
Emily Sep 2014
oh baby
the way you make me feel inside
is unlike anything i've felt in my entire life
you make me feel excited
you make me feel like i am invincible
like i can take on the world
you make me feel like i'm the only girl
in your beautiful, blue eyes
and you're mine
now that i've got you
i'm on cloud nine
with you, there's only yellow
there is no blue
when i miss you
i look up and think of you
you are the sun
the moon
and all the stars
you are my sky
you are my everything
my whole world
our time together is my favorite
i swear, i knew you in another life
there's no way a bond like the one we share
could come out of no where
this is destiny
this is fate
this is something more
you are God given
you came straight from Heaven
i love you with my entire heart
i worship you with my body
i adore you with every fiber of my being
you are my counterpart in this life
oh baby
i love you
Sep 2014 · 4.0k
ethereal glow
Emily Sep 2014
tears fall from our eyes
as we say goodbye
and come down from this high
my lover is precious
she is everything to me
without her
i have nothing
what would i do
without her eyes to look into
what would i do
without her kisses to feel against my lips
what would i do
without her beautiful voice to soak in
what would i do
without her sweet heart
i'm so lucky she loves me
i just hate it when we are apart
every day our love continues to grow
i can't wait to see her next
and witness her ethereal glow
she is my darling
and nothing or no one
could ever come between
bonded for life
she is my queen
Sep 2014 · 1.3k
love letter
Emily Sep 2014
dear the love of my life,

thank you for waltzing into my world
so quickly and so unexpectedly
i think we are nothing more
than the perfect stroke of destiny
we are meant to be
there is a reason we found each other
to cure one another from hopeless days
and finally live through our own cliches
you are my sun, my moon, and my stars
without you i am nothing
but a body full of scars
you cure me from self doubt
you fix me from self hate
make me realize i'm unconditionally loved
make me truly believe in fate
you are my mantra, my muse, my woman
i can't breathe without you
not with the absence of your love, i just couldn't
thank you for being mine
and thank you for giving yourself to me
no amount of time or words
could allow me to ever express that to you adequately
give me your forever
not a day less will do
i will love you until my last breath
and when my spirit thrives after my body has died
you, my soulmate, will always be by my side
i love you, lauren.
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