My stupid idea
of you and I making love
is like what poets and writers do
with words and sentences
fancy tongue work and grammar
no touching
no holding
just the movement of our lips
forming the love
that we make
with
words

One of the greatest feelings I have ever experienced
was the feeling of invisibility
I sat on the floor in front of the auditorium  
waiting for the class before me to be let out
just reading a book and listening to music
A few minutes passed
The class was released from their professors grip for then night
a swarm of kids left the room
I stayed on the floor reading
not being noticed
Alone
I watched from over the peripheral of my book at all the legs passing by  
No one noticed me
No one tripped over me
I was ignored  
I felt like I had stopped time
I felt like I'd mastered the art
of being invisible

All Again For You- We The Kings
You were everything that's bad for me*

Pheromone Cvlt - Letlive.
All the boys will grow up to be those broken men

Follow You- Bring Me the Horizon
So you can drag me through Hell if it meant I could hold your hand

Boston- Moose Blood
Bored with nothing to do, but lay around listening to Deja Entendu thinking about you..

Come Home - Tonight Alive
Laying under the light of the full moon and I would give anything to be there with you.

Drown - Bring Me the Horizon
What doesn't destroy you, leaves you broken instead

All Along The Watchtower - Jimi Hendrix
But you and I we've been through that and this is not our fate

Dreamers Disease- Letlive.
While I’m out here making history, you’re making love

True Friends - Bring Me the Horizon
Karma has no deadline

Better Off This Way - A Day to Remember
When will you act your age

The Divine Zero - Pierce The Veil
Maybe I can swim into your thoughts like your drugs do

The Other Side - Tonight Alive
I meant it every time I said I love you; And there are so many things I wanted to say, but I was a mess.

Lane Boy - TwentyOnePilots
I know a thing or two about pain and darkness; Who would you live and die for on that list

The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot-Brand New
You say you wanted a solution; you just wanted to be missed

Your Guardian Angel- Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
How this world turns cold and breaks through my soul

Cardiology- Good Charlotte
No book that I can find has the answer, a medicine can't cure the fact that I'm still yours

All My Heart- Sleeping With Sirens
I could have been better and stronger for you and me

Vanilla Twilight - Owl City
*Cause cold nostalgia chills me to the bone; Oh if my voice could reach back through the past

I want to feel stellar
I crave the feeling
of your skin
when I feel my worst
your fingers tracing
the profile of my hand
will make my grayest days

*vibrant

to love is one thing*

---

to be in love is another

I received an email today
with some of your last thoughts and words.
You wanted to change the world
but you are now no more.
I have never met you,
spoke with you,
seen you face to face.
But in reading your words,
I have found common ground.
You will never know me
and I will never know you.
While I’m still here
still stealing breaths while I can,
I want this to be clear...
You are my friend
and you have changed my world.

Often times when I need them most
my words will runaway.
Confounding me, leaving my mind to coast
while I can't find anything to say.
I have all these ideas I would like to boast
but in my mind, they won’t convey.

****.

My heart is a rodeo
and when I draw my last breath
I will finally win
my gold buckle.

My favorite book, you know,
the one I read over and over again,
the one I never get tired of talking about,
the one with the story that hits me the hardest,
the one that makes me think,
the book I can’t put down
and makes me say
“just one more page”
before I go to bed.

The book that I never want to end.

The cover is brilliantly put together;
colorful, eye catching, yet fragile,
It’s beauty is not only in the cover,
It lies deeper within its contents.
A story so spellbinding it puts
Harry Potter and company to shame.
Pages filled with a love, so magnificent
John Green’s characters can’t compare.
A story and adventure so wildly vast,
not even Jodi Picoult could keep up.

Here’s the dilemma
the book I love most
Is sifted through with a fine tooth comb
when really it does not need to be,
And the worst of this dilemma
Is when I came to the realization that
My favorite book of all,
The one I have read and reread,
scribbling notes in the pages,
memorizing my favorite quotes,
and putting my own heart and soul
into its existence,
is when someone borrows it

and never gives it back.

I look at your countenance
so close to my face
and it takes every ounce
of self control
to not discover*
*what you taste like

I can't get close enough*
to my computer speakers
while my favorite band plays
so I inject the thumping
of the bass
*into my veins

As I lay with bated breath
my arms and legs drape over the sides of this bed
I collect the strength to carve a message into the hardwood floor:
“I loved her"