Remember when things were simple?

When the most complicated thing in life was deciding what flavor juice box you wanted?

Everyday, I wish I still had the innocence of a youth.

Before I knew anything of drugs, or alcohol, or relationships, or love.

When I still trusted those close to me.

Remember when things were simple?

Those precious moments are slipping through my fingertips, poisoned by reality.

Art defines me...
Reading unwinds me...
Poetry keeps me going by keeping the blood in my vanes flowing
Most people judge me, even though they barely know me

That's why I spend my time on me
Yes... I'm lonely
But nobody gets me

Nobody get's that I'de rather put my head in a book
Or I'd rather write a song...1 or 2
Nobody get's that poetry is like a drug
I keep on using but can't get enough

Even GRAMMAR is fun
Thats why my friends don't walk they run

To scared of the girl who always writes
And never has time for any real fun
I mean like playing with a real gun
Or riding a bike with her eyes closed
Real stuff like getting in a bed without any clothers

Most people don't see I'm just not ready
To pretend I'm something I don't want to be
But still they keep on pushing pushing and pushing me

The vast space between them
As the sun continually chases the moon,
Who smiles back at the sun.
Watching her in the dark
Knowing she's admiring him from afar,
The sun can distinguish the moon
In the dark with a thousand stars
But the moon has trouble finding the sun.
One day, they'll be in front of each other.

As the moon says,
   " Ah, this is the girl who radiates
       As beautiful as the stars around me"
And the sun says,
   "So, I finally get to see the boy
       Who perfectly reflects my light,
       A quiet mirror of my own image"

When that day comes,
That will be the time
The world will stop.

Dearest Unreal and Unforgiving God,

It's three weeks to the day an old friend killed himself and I'm counting the ways I've changed.

My world is still upside down, even though I've stopped crying now I can't stop reimagining life in ways to make it tender again.

I swear, I've held my hand out to everyone I've ever wanted to and it's not enough. I can still feel myself falling so incredibly short.

How do you explain to someone how softly you felt for them while they shivered in your arms, how all their scars seemed to run through your heart, tugging your sleeve towards the direction of "I want to love you more and more until you love yourself."? How do you tell them you wanted to rewrite every suicide note, resign it with "never mind"? I can't began to find the words for "I want you to be happy so bad it keeps me up at night."

And hey God, would it **** you to make a miracle happen every once in a while?

I have wanted to spread the incredible, bursting compassion I felt when he died, that terrible, uncontainable empathy, but how is it that words fall short on everyone except I'm sorry?

I'm trying to touch lives in a way that November 27 will again just be a date. I'm trying to make it all right. I'm trying to be the light that could've lit up the dark and made the world turn again.

As you were taking your last breath I hope you felt this.

today,
i passed by a stranger.

she looked worried,
eyebrows bunched together forming little lines in between.

today,
i passed by the same stranger.

she look tired,
skin pale and lips peeling.

today,
i passed by the stranger once again.

she looked happy,
eyes as bright as the sun and teeth baring its refreshing white.

today,
i realized time does wonders for everyone.

the gray, dull me a few days ago was replaced by the shocking yellow i am and will forever be.

The feelings I hold for you, are held back by the ways you feel.
But maybe as time goes on, what's better will soon be real.
I could go on about how your words entertain my drive to live.
To be by your side and with you so much more, there's few that I wouldn't give.
You hold me down, you call me out but you shelter me from the storm of my life.
You've taken me to some greater wisdom, such wit sharper than the knife.
You're view relates and still you widen the way I continue to see.
So maybe if I could stick here with you you'll come around and want more me.
This love I can't define, I don't even know how sure.
But what I know is that I love you now and there'll be always more

Moon sighs into infinity,
she moans
at the thought of morning kisses from the Sun
fleeting passions
always spinning into eternity

Moon dreams
of delicate snow angels
in a dance of wings around her
she is frozen stardust carved by a sightless deity
she is ice
glistening when the Sun touches her
melting
when the Sun touches her
melting
at his touch

Moon closes her eyes, whispers
touch me
Sun opens his eyes, smiles

they are one
dawn
symphony

If I must die,
Let it be as a leaf does in autumn.
A brilliant flash of color
Gentle drifting to the ground.
Oh, let me die as a leaf does
When the mornings are cool
And the air is crisp.
Let me dance upon the breeze
Let me rest upon the pavement.
If I must die,
Let it as a leaf does in autumn
Fading away
Before the cold of winter.