I have homework to do
But I keep thinking about you
The way we where
It keeps me from thinking clearly

I have classes to follow
But I keep staying at home
Because I keep thinking about you
The way you moved on

I have a study to finish
But I can't focus on the tasks to do
My brain won't let me
Because all it can do, is think about you

I have point to gain, so I'll pass the year
I want to, I really want to
But you, my past are holding me back
I don't know how to, how to move on

It was 2nd Christmas day,
I woke up and knew, it is that day.
The day we were supposed to be with your family,
Instead, we were both with our own family.
It wasn't supposed to be like this,
And I hate how it is.
How we don't speak anymore,
For I see you as something more.
Then how you see me,
I hate this new me.
I hate the fact of being alone in those days,
And seeing every one around me having a great day.
It hurts to be a lone,
It makes my heart turn in to stone.
We were one,
Now we both have none.

Every one says merry Christmas,
But all I feel is sickness.
I am not who I was,
And life just won't pause.
It goes on with or with out me,
I have to become this new me.
For I will have to move on,
Because life is like a marathon.
move on or quit,
It is either, make or lose it.
There is no road in between,
At least, there is non that I have seen.

There hasn't been a day gone by
Without a thought of you
Every day again
Every hour again

There hasn't been a day gone by
Without a thought of the past
What we did
What we wanted

There hasn't been a day gone by
Without a thought of the here and now
How much I hate it
How much I resent it

There hasn't been a day gone by
Without a thought of the future
What it would have looked like
What we would have done

There hasn't been a day gone by
Without my mind being ****** up
Every day again, I torture my self
Every ******* day again, I wish I could travel back in time

I do it every time at the same time.
I do it every same day in every week of the year.
I do the same things every time I work.

But today, something was different.
Today was not my normal day of work.
Though today was still a great day.

A regular customer looked at me.
A regular customer recognized me.
A regular customer spoke to me.

And she said:
"I haven't seen you in a long time,
It is nice to see a familiar face around."

And I felt appreciated,
And I felt acknowledged,
And I felt great.

It is amazing how much some little words can mean to a person.
It is important to cherish those little moments.
It is something that we need to do more often.

Just say some little words to someone,
Even if they don't mean anything to you,
It can do a lot for someone else.

Breaking seems to be my new nature
Yesterday I saw a picture of her and a friend
It made me broken again
Broken like a earthquake cracks the ground

She went to a concert with a friend
A concert that we where supposed to go to
It hurts to see her move on while I am staying behind

It feels like I am stuck
Hanging in the past
Frozen in the moment she left me

I feel broken
I feel miserable
Don't know what to do
Where to go
How to get past it

I don't want to feel this way
I want to move on
But every time again
I feel this pain
This emptiness inside me
It keeps pulling me back
Into the void of pain and memory

The mind is traveling on it's own
West to South, North to East
It's traveling miles from one side to the other

Thoughts are spinning around
Like a rocket getting out of control
Up and down, right to left

Ideas are popping up
Just the same as a mole pops up to look above ground
Bending backwards over, almost inside out

That little blackhole full of things
It won't rest, it won't sleep
Not when it is in need
In need of space
To think, to be free
To be floating around the earth
Like a hot air balloon

Does this mean I am lonely
Laying in my bed
Listening to metal ish music
With a slightly tipsied head
Writing poems about my thoughts
Does this mean I am lonely
Because I am drinking alone
My brain racing around
Full of thoughts
Does this mean I am lonely

No I am not
But I live
So I will be in time

A scar here, a scare there
It is chaos in my mind
You are glued to my thoughts so it seems
Listening to metal keeps me sane
Reflects my mind
Just that organized chaos
I don't know what to do
How to get rid of you
Of the thoughts that keeps coming back
The way you left me
It hurts like hell
It broke me, it left me in pieces
You are glued to my mind
I don't know how to fix it
It makes me go crazy
I know one way to get rid of it all
I requires from me my last breath of air
So I can just be free for once
Maybe this is the solution
Unless some one else knows one
So I can be free and roam around once more
Free of pain free of delusions
Free of thoughts of wonders
Free of the past to get to the future
Free of me, to start anew

A poem to be written
Is a thought to be told
It gives you a new view
A perspective seen by others

A poem to be written
Is a tale to be told
For little kids to listen to
Just the little story before bedtime

A poem to be written
Is a conversation unspoken of
Words from one mind to it self
In order to keep it talking

A poem to be written
Is a song to be sung
For radios to play
And crowds to scream out loud

The gloomy glare in the lense
Looking upon a girl standing on top of the rock

It has this warm feeling, it gives a certain presence
Watching over the water, through the trees and over hils

Even though I know what her history is
I still wonder what she thinks about it

The series isn't over yet
Every day again she tries to get a hold of the wheel in the cockpit

But miserably fails over and over
The plane is swinging from left to right and back

Everything seems to be out of control, as if life was over
But there she is, standing strait
Looking over the trees watching the water
At a sunny day, she keeps going

She is bearly holding it together
Crying from day to day, but she has faith
It will all be better, one day, soon
Standing there on top of the rock, watching the water peacefully move by
She knows one day it will all be beter, just like the waters forthgoing

You shot me with your arrow of love
It made me feel great
In the end you shot me with your arrow of poison
It made me dead inside

The movie in the picture palace
It was a lot of drama
It was like a drama queen
It was about queen

The movie in the motion palace
It made me hate my self
It made me feel so sad
It made me feel broken

The movie in the movie house
It was pain full to see
It was beautiful to hear
It was confronting my live

The movie in the picture house
It made me think
It made me cry silent
It made me feel left alone

The movie in the motion house
It was heart breaking to see
It was reminding me
It was hard to see

The movie in the cinema
It reminded me of what I had
It reminded me of what I could have
It reminded me what love really is like

The difficulty with a love one,
When to talk when to keep quiet,
But never to shout.

The love for a love one,
When to keep pushing,
To give the space.

The fear of losing one,
When to stay, when to run,
But never to hurt.

The beauty of a love one,
To hold close, to be dear,
But never hate one another.

The love of a loved one,
The aching moments in between,
But never to be destroyed.

To love a loved one,
To be loved by a loved one,
To keep on loving,
And never to hate.

What to say to the world,
When there is nothing to say.
What to ask from the world,
When there is nothing to get.

Words are spoke,
Yet there is nothing said.
Deeds are being done,
Yet nothing is changing.

What to be in the world,
When it is doomed to fail.
What to do in the world,
When there is nothing to be done.

Where to go in a world full of hate,
Where to go in a heart of pain,
Where to go when there is no road to take,
Where to go when the path is dark.

Let it be a light in the darkness,
Be who you are, be who you desire to be.
Because being you are is not the hardest,
Being who others want you to be is not something you will agree.

Hello there
Lets get this message in the air
We might give the convesation a little flair

How are you doing
Maybey the next message goes with a boeing
Just to get the conversation going

I hope you like this little poem
I hope you will find this bottle unbroken
I hope our next message can be spoken

Let me know if this message came through
I would like it if you do
And the best of luck to you

When I first met you, I saw this broken girl.
A girl who was in need of someone, someone that would be there for you.
You had been through so much pain and trouble.
Pain and trouble that broke you from the inside.
Inside was a suicidal girl, hurt and broken.

I was there for you just as a friend,
I lent you my ear, so you could speak,
I gave you all my attention,
I gave you all of my time, even more than I had.

You where broken and needed someone to talk to.
To me you spoke about all of your pains.
Pains that made you feel left and miserable.

You never saw me as a friend,
You saw me and was instantly in love,
You wanted me,
You claimed me.

Words spoken by you cause me pain.
Pain in my ears because of your past.
Your past hasn't been easy.
Easy wouldn't have described our lives.
Lives that where full of pain from the past.

You said that I was the one, keeping you a live,
You said that you needed me,
You said that you could open your heart to me,
You said that you where able to speak with me.

And here I am, broken from the inside.
Inside of me is pain and it hurts a lot.
A lot of thoughts of us, are triggered by daily things.
Things we did together, things you liked.

I am broken,
I am hurt,
I am suicidal,
I am feeling left a lone,
I am in need of your help,
I am in need of your love,
I am in need of you.

Inside of me is a suicidal boy, hurt and broken.
Pain and trouble caused by you broke me from the inside.
I have been through so much pain and trouble.
A boy who is in need of someone, someone like I have been.
When you left me, I became this broken boy.

I need to put on some new glasses
To take a new and refreshed look on the world
On the reality we live in
Just to get the view of the other side of the world
To shift my view from bad and dark
To good and full of light

I need to burn the bridges down
The bridge between the new and the past
I need to burn the bridges down
Burn them down, burn them down

I need to start afresh, take a refreshed look
walk to the other side
Just to take it in another perspective
The turn the thing upside down
inside out, outside in

I need to burn the bridges down
The bridge between the new and the past
I need to burn the bridges down
Burn them down, burn them down

I need to walk away from the past
Move along the path
To the new future
And not cling to the old past
Which had moved on without me

I need to burn the bridges down
The bridge between the new and the past
I need to burn the bridges down
Burn them down, burn them down

I need to take that turn
Just to get away from the past
To start over, start anew
Keep moving even when it seems to get anywhere else
It might lead to somewhere you don't want to be
But that is the path of life
It takes you even if you don't want to

I need to burn the bridges down
The bridge between the new and the past
I need to burn the bridges down
Burn them down, burn them down
Burn them down, burn them down
Burn them down, burn them down
The bridges between the past of my life
And the here and now
I need to burn them down
Burn them down, burn them down
Burn them down, burn them down
Burn them down, burn them down

A new day starts.
The sun comes up,
I wake up.
The sun travels further,
I travel further.
The sun reached its top,
I reached my top.
The sun goes down,
I go down.
The sun has set,
I have set.
The moon rises,
As do I.
The moon travels,
As do I.
The moon reached the top,
As did I.
The moon has set,
As did I.
And an other day has been lived.

Please take me now
I want to go
God doesn't love for all I know
You, I don't know

Please take me now
I don't know where else to go
God I have never seen
Heaven know my sins

Please take me now
I must go
Never spoke with god, never seen god
There is no place for me there

Please take me now
I need to go
For I have no life here
And heaven knows

The empty void inside of me is growing
The only thing that I do is hoping
That one day my life will pass by
When I do, no one will cry

My life is ****** up from the inside
My life seems perfect and nice from the outside
My life has been turned inside out
I just wish for my heart to be pulled out

What makes it so impossible
What is the point of life if you hate it
What is life if it is far from optimal
I just want to die, just for my throat to be slit

I can't keep living like this
I need to get out of here
I just want to get that death kiss
There is nothing keeping me here

No one likes me the way I am
No one gets a long with me because they like me
No one loves me
All I need to do is, find that **** switch of this program

I am done with life
I can't go on like this
I just need to grab that kitchen knife
I just want my life to burst like a flower dehisces

Depression is like math
It is like a sinus wave multiplied by x    
Along the x line we can count the amount of depression
Along the y line we can count how much we feel it

In the beginning there is no depression and no pain
Then there is the first top, some pain and some depression
The further we go along the line of depression
The amount of pain varies between feeling and not feeling
And the bigger our depression gets the more we feel

At a distance far away
Your house is build on a solid ground
You walk your steps through the city

At a distance far away
Your bed is placed in a tidy room
Your books a stacked on the shelf

At a distance far away
You live your live
You read your book about the higher person

At a distance far away
You step in the teleporting machine
To start your travel to a place far away

This pain of mine
I am surely not fine
It feels bigger than me
For I am broken most definitely
I am in need of help
Like a lions mother without her welp

Is there a way to keep going
As the pain is growing
It rides like a car without gas
I get to see it al from first class
All I need is some words
The first to see, it were dead birds

I had a dream
A dream about you
You and I were back together
Together we were happy

Then something happend, I didn't want to
To stay happy, I should have stayed in that dream
That dream was about us being together
Together everything was fine

I wish I didn't wake up
Waking up is what made me depressed again
Again I want to stay in bed
In bed I want to be all day

Please let me go
Let me go while I can
I can be gone
Gone I want to be

Next time I don't want to wake up
Waking up doesn't make me happy
Happy I'll never be again
Again I hate my life for waking up

My ears are turned red
My body is filled with liquid
My relity is dizzed
My passed is passed
My life is now

I must move on
I can not look back, for it is killing me
I want it to be the passed
I need it to be the passed
I need to move on
I am filled with liquid

It makes me dizzed
It makes me feel wierd
It makes me react slowly
It makes me more wierd then I already am
It makes me qeustion

Do I want more
Do I need to stop
Do I need to drink more
Do I need less
Do I want to drink less

I know it is bad
But it makes me care less
It makes me forget
It makes me move on

Your love is like a drug to me.
You made me a drug addict.
For I can not live without your love.
I am in a dying need for it.

You said those words
"I love you"
But did you every really say them
Or was it more of a "it's what people in love say" thing

You broke my heart
At first I was fine
I was broken for sure

You were the reason
When I realised what really happened
I was gone, gone to the darkness of live

Your absence made me go crazy
I found the light switch
I felt fine, really I did
It was like I fixed my heart

You had me, and lost me
But it never really was a light switch
It was just a mere flashlight
A light that will run out of juice
And I never really fixed my heart
It was just wrapped in ducktape

You are still hurting me
That tape never covered my whole heart
It left open spots
Spots that leak my love, my live, my sanity
From time to time I feel this pain
This emptiness
This absence of sanity

It has been
Days
Weeks
months

Since
I have met you
You have left me

Every single day I have been
Thinking of you
Reminded of you
From the day we met

I want it to
Stop
End

I want to
Live my life
Move on
Be free

I want what you have, you want what I have
And the only thing we see in each others life
Are the good moments
The things, I think you like the most

But the opposite is true
We only see things we like ourselves the most
What we like about the other persons life the most
Are not the things they like the most

We should listen more
watch more
Feel more
Care more
Just to know someone else
And not only think about ourselves

Tell everyone,
Or no one.
Tell my parents,
Or tell my brothers and sister.
Tell to all who want to know,
Or don't at all.

I love them,
And I will miss them.
For I don't want to be here anymore,
This I can not bare.

Tell my ex girlfriend,
She was all I ever wanted.
Tell her I love her,
And that I will never forget her.

Tell all of them that I said,
Farewell, please live on without me, because you can what I could not.

My dear friends
Thank you for being there for me
Carrying me around, all day long
Feet by feet, step by step

No matter the weight of me
You walk me around
Day in day out, with any question

You are there when I need you
Where ever I need you
How ever I need you

My feet, my dear friends
I thank you for being there
In times of need, in times of feast
For every time you where there for me

Your words made my hair stand up right,
Like frozen water cones hanging from the mountain rocks.
It touched me right in the middle of my heart,
Like a campfire warming you up from the front.
But there was this little feeling,
This shivering down my spine,
It could have been from the cold of the mountain rocks.
You may warm my heart, But it leaves me cold.
You may light my path, But it only will lead into the darkness.
What ever it is that you are doing,
Don’t stop, don’t go,
Light my path, keep me warm,
Or I will end up being a frozen statue in the cold dark mountains.

I hope you will understand
My pain, my fear, my thinking
I have encountered some trouble along the way

I hope you will understand
When I say I am afraid you will leave too
I had a girlfriend, whom I loved to death

I hope you will understand
That I have been broken before
And now I am frightened it will happen again

I hope you will understand
That I love you with all I have
And I hope you won't leave me too

I hope you will understand
That I don't want you to leave me as well
Not as I have been left before

You must know
That I am giving all I can
That I want you in my life
So please don't leave me too
I want you, I need you
You are all I have, all I need
And I love you

Between dusk and dawn, time stops
Darkness rises, stars start twinkling
In the darkness you can hear the wolfs howling
Trough the darkness army rises
Armies with large creatures, creatures of the dark

At day they will hide
Seek shelter of the light
At night they will march
To war they will go

Creatures of the night
Rooming the world
Searching and fighting
Looking for salvation fighting for freedom
But they never find it
So they march until the light arises

When will it be Friday
So no one will ask why I drink beer

When will it be Friday
So I don't have to think about school

Please let it be Friday
Because I want to be free

You said you still wanted to be friends,
Yet you don't talk.
You said you still wanted to be friends,
Yet you don't say a word.
You said you still wanted to be friends,
Yet I don't hear from you.

When I text you,
You say words back.
When I text you,
You answer them.
When I text you,
I hear from you.
You said you still wanted to be friends.

Yet I don't know what you do.
Yet I don't know where you go.
Yet I don't know who you are.
Yet I don't know you.
You said you still wanted to be friends.

I wonder how you do.
I wonder what you do.
I wonder where you go.
I wonder if you want to speak to me.
I wonder if you lied to me.
You said you still wanted to be friends.

But I don't hear from you,
You don't speak to me,
You don't text me,
You don't call me,
You don't say a word.
And yet you said you still wanted to be friends.