I've been trying to change,
And it makes me cringe,
I have a vision that isn't too insane,
I see two paths,
Separated by the choices I make,
Begging me to make the right choices for my futures sake,
It's warning me that a lot is at stake,
Calling me to wake up,
From the slumber,
I've stumbled in.

There are several ways to earn that loonie,
Or even that toonie,
Just got to look for the right opportunity,
And it is never easy,
But that is the harsh reality.

I know that sounds heavy,
But keep listening to me.

I have a drive that pulsates within me,
And it wants to set a vibe around me,
You see,
I want to make the life,
So I can spend it with a wife,
And buy her the right ring,
And pay my parents back their earnings,
So keep watching me,
Because I am going to make sure,
That barrier will shatter,
Into forgotten matter.

Creativity is a spark that lights the fire,
Creativity is the genius in the soul,
Creativity is the genuine attraction in the heart,
Creativity is the spark in the eyes,
Creativity is the champion of obstacles,
Creativity is the essence of surprise.

You all are leaving,
and its putting me in a state of grieving,
I guess I'm scared of this strange change,
paired with knowing life is never going to be the same,
it's kind of a shame,
however I want us all to do good in this life,
and than can only happen,
with our feet pressing on,
and our faith maintaining to be strong,
so that we can meet on the plains of tomorrow,
where we can smile and greet,
and accept that life is bittersweet.

Listening to these depressing songs.
It's ironically giving me the will to be strong,
And I don't mind if they're being played for long.
They're making the oceans of my heart rift,
Letting my soul drift in the cold water.

Staring up into the sun,
Ironically it seems fun.

Dipping in my own sorrow,
Urging me to press play,
Again and again,
Making me feel a little bit insane.

I'm enjoying dwelling in my inexplicable pain,
Making me realize,
That maybe,
Sometimes,
One can be happy by just being sad.

I'm pretty scared looking down into the abyss,
Not knowing what to expect from its vastness,
It's hard to explain my paranoia,
And hard to understand my timidness,
But I have overcome other fears,
And I will conquer this one too,
If  not today,
Then tomorrow,
If not tomorrow,
Then one day,
I will come back and look straight into the abyss.

When I was young,
I thought I could control all the problems,
with the love of my heart,
through the sweet words spoken from my tongue,
but I grew up,
after my efforts,
were beaten and broken,
after they were worn and torn,
and here I am sitting,
older than I was before,
younger than I will be after,
trying to absorb and accept,
that things are beyond my control.

I don't know.
I don't know,
what it feels like to love as a parent,
because my experience is limited by my experiences.

I haven't had the chance to experience parenthood,
however existence is shared by all existing things,
and whenever I observe the existence of parenthood,
Many things are shared with me.
Good and Bad.

It is here I begin to understand what a child is to a parent.

A child is like the sun,
to its parents sea.

The brighter a child shines,
the deeper its rays penetrate,
the layers of the sea.

And you may wonder,
How does the sun get to shine bright?

The sun gets to shine bright,
Through the love, understanding and acceptance of the sea.

If you can't see,
How can you expect to be free,
Sitting on your knee,
Taking it all,
Paying a hidden fee,
To the engine.

Selling your soul,
Thinking you're not part of the sin,
And then wondering why does it smell so foul.

You're in it,
And so am I,
And so are the masses.
Programmed over the eras,
To chase the escape,
Forgetting that it's just vape.

Who are we kiddin?
We all can see,
Fom the seats we're sitting in,
Absorbing the malicious,
Expelling the benevolence,
and being blatantly shameless,
Forgetting that such an exsistence should be nameless.

But here we are,
Here we are,
Smitten by the evil kitten,
Claiming what can we do,
What can we do?

Who are you shittin?
Who are we shittin?
But ain't it fittin.

I guess we do belong,
We did reap what we sowed,
And we did it all together.


Here's a pill,
Forget that it'll make you ill,
But this is it.
There is no escape.
So why are we looking for salvation,
In the new phone,
In the company raise,
In the new hand bag.

Same fallacy,
Different phase,
Moving on.

The salvation you seek,
Is something that you'll find inside,
And even when you do,
She will never stick around.

So accept,
That every day won't be amazing,
And don't forget,
That everyday doesn't have to be bad,
And that's what this life is made of,
Till the day we all are just vape.

Friends standing on the beach,
Talking about what they preach.

Beers in a bottle,
Their thoughts on full throttle.

Justifying their strive,
to live a life.

Talking about the same thing in the same way,
but with a different take.

In all this strife,
while we seek for ultimate fulfillment in different things,
we forget we're preaching and reaching in different ways.

But that is how the universe spins,
Within and Without,
And I accept that it spins and spins,
even when I think of nothing,
even when I think of everything.

Never did I imagine growing up,
And never in such a strange way,
I remember everyone I grew up with,
They remind me of a simpler state,
However they probably grew up too,
In their own possibly strange way,
And maybe in their hearts,
They hum,
And wonder about,
How life goes on!

With each step I take,
I seek to move closer,
because you are the linchpin of ultimate knowledge and wisdom,
but each step has its own caveat,
So excuse me for all past, present and future missteps.

I am a victim of my own vices,
and the sources of my action or inaction,
scares me deep inside,
because I know what they perpetuate,
So I ask of you,
Provide me a right step for each right step,
and forgive me for each wrong step,
despite the judgement of others,
because I yearn to return home,
just like all the other travelers.

I am the captain of my ship on this soul plane,
The master of my fate in destiny's take,
The north star within my dark seas,
I will make it through the darkest valleys,
To the peak of the tallest mountains,
And on to the clouds,
And stars,
And the unknown beyond,
So unleash the drive and determination,
Within me,
That no zenith can,
Satisfy.

One:
We're all victims of our own vices,
Those things that cause a cosmic crisis,
Rather than attacking the ones that dwell within us,
We lash out at the ones we find outside in others.
It's a case of right enemy, wrong battlefield.
And those of us who do fight the war inside,
Are fated to fight on two fronts,
It may  be a Sisyphean task,
But we will not be judged by our failures,
We will be judged by our efforts,
Our resilience,
Our hope,
Our spirit.

Two:
The greatest evil a human will face is not the devil, not a demon, not an animal but another human and the irony of it all is that it is the evil we can not live without.

Three:
Man is political by nature,
His ego inherited from his father and mother,
And his struggle created by his creator.

Can you see?
Human, can you see?
You are the most special being in all existence,
Yet you act like you're nothing at all,
And you walk around like nothing else matters.

Can't you see?
Human, can't you see?
All the laws you're fighting against,
Are the keys to all the doors you seek to unlock.

Come,
I'll show you,
The maps to the cosmos,
That belongs inside of you.

Can you see?
Human, can you see?
How the birds fly to the south,
Against the wind,
Against all odds,
Obeying the laws,
Tirelessly keeping their spirit alive.

Then why do you complain about how hard life is,
Why do you complain about how unfortunate you are,
Why do you take the struggle as punishment?

Can't you see?
Human, can't you see?
The trees and plants,
Who witness the quartet of seasons,
Accepting whatever tune comes on their way,
Spinning tirelessly,
Spinning through life and death,
Spinning like the universe.

Then how can you use your brain and mouth to complain?
Why would you allow your assets to commit to such waste?
Speak not!
Unless you seek to add value to the ocean around your soul.

Can you see?
Human, can you see?
The mountain whose hem stretches into land and sea,
Offering you strange and exciting lands,
Offering you knowledge and experience,
It remains nailed to its purpose.

Then how can you go astray from yours?
How can you allow the wind and sea to throw you about like a pebble,
When you are a mountain.
Allow the wind and sea to carry grains of you,
But don't forget where you came from.
Don't forget your identity,
So even your grains don't.
No matter where they are carried,
No matter how far they are carried.

Can't you see,
Human, can't you see?
The fish in the sea,
the fish in the rivers,
who swim against the unforgiving currents,
never giving in to fatigue,
always focusing on their destination.
They refuse to complain,
because complain doesn't exist.

O human,
remember,
it is only in the strongest and hardest currents,
where the strongest and hardest muscles are developed.
Don't forget your essence,
don't forget your spirit,
because that is the mountain within you.

Stumbling and tumbling,
Shifting and drifting,
Losing and Looting,
I came to stand on the edge of existence,
looking down into the dark abyss,
staring up at celestial maps.
There I finally found the road that I searched for,
the knowledge I longed for.

So I traveled on the road of love,
sailing from shore to shore,
in the vastness of the cosmic ocean,
in search of the peaceful potion,
it taught me lessons,
it revealed  truths,
it humbled the beast,
carving a being that I can't explain,
a being that I love,
a being that loves.

Now I am in the long mesmerizing road home,
and the true journey has just began,
how long it will take? I know not
how hard will it be? I care not
All I know is that the presence of the present,
is the eternal gift,
the future uncertain,
and the past already written.

Society is broken,
soaked in the flaws of its own skin,
blinded by its sin,
looking for salvation,
at the wrong station,
breeding an apathetic nation,
not realizing the road it treads on is the road to the creation,
of its very own destruction.

Selfish and foolish,
short-sighted and narrow-minded,
it's a sad bunch,
that is being crunched and punched,
by its own hand.

It makes me sad,
it makes me weep,
how can we be so misguided,
and divided,
when the connection we seek,
is universal.

It's the devil I tell you,
the devil inside,
the voice that makes you forget,
that the battle for good,
is the one inside.

I'm starting to write again,
I've lit a furnace long forsaken,
It's a new look on an old hobby,
A different perspective through the same eyes,
An old dog with new tricks.

I'm sitting here,
Looking at the fan spin,
Noting the time tick,
And all I remember,
Is the moments that ran by,
And how they left their mark,
On a memory,
Whose eyes are already feeling tired,
Yet the brain connected,
Knows there is much to see,
Much to learn and much to do,
Before the eyes flicker out,
And the soul departs.

My father once said
"My son, the world is a cruel place."

I could not disagree more
so I set out to prove him wrong
so convinced was I
Till I realized,

He was right,
I was wrong.

He was older,
I was younger.

He was wise,
I was foolish.

He was the father,
I was the son.

Look at them,
The flawless skin,
Energetic stride,
The abundance of sin,
The overbearing pride,
These young fools.

How I use to be so,
Use to be like them,
And How I spent it away,
in the same way with a different code,
And different friends,
How we use to be young fools,
Just like them.

I'm scared,
Because I have visions,
Of my youthful soul fleeting away,
As it grows older in this world.

The picture is clear,
That this world is in a messy twirl,
Economics,
Politics,
Religions,
States,
Individuals,
And our planet,
Are all vulnerable to chaos,
And as I grow older,
The hope within me is slowly losing its momentum,
The hope to make sense of it all,
The hope to find the honest truth.

The picture is clear,
The truth is near,
Somewhere deep within my soul,
A part I still haven't reached,
And the hope lingers within me,
That if I'll ever find it,
If I'll ever embrace it,
If I'll ever have the courage to accept it

However,
My hope for our earth maintains it course,
Driven by my rationale,
And that is,
If we've come this far in history with chaos dancing,
Around every corner,
Then where could we be tomorrow,
With peace standing by our side?

You're all over the place,
Yet there isn't enough for everyone,
I'm not saying saying this because I'm hurt,
I'm just saying this because of what I see,
It isn't your fault,
But it's all these fools you're surrounded by,
Who go around accepting the love they think deserve.
When they should be accepting the love they already have.

I am a poet in my heart,
A philosopher in my head,
So I spin these words around,
Sometimes not knowing what they're about,
I know that comes of as a bit shallow and hollow,
But Look in between the words,
They contain a shard,
An ink of me,
Telling you why I write,
In spite,
Of it seeming pointless at times.

I look around at the pain of the world,
And it drains me,
To think about everyone being hurt,
it makes me thinks,
It makes me doubt,
That I could carry on,
I would shrivel and die,
But I can't,
So I won't.
I'll just remember the pain,
In my thoughts,
And not in my heart.

I don't write to be good at it,
I don't write to show it off,
I certainly don't write for me,
I write for the sake of writing,
Because it is the right way to write.

However if you open my writing,
Then you'll realize I write for everything,
Anything and anybody,
I write for inspiration,
I write for the sake of writing,
Not as a means to an end,
But just as end.