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"doings" poems
Incoherent because of your doings. You've changed a lot. I am an introvert person now. Because I don't want to be invulnerable.
0
Sep 1, 2014
Sep 1, 2014 at 8:32 AM UTC
Change
All things that pass Are woman's looking-glass; They show her how her bloom must fade, And she herself be laid With withered roses in the shade; With withered roses and the fallen peach, Unlovely, out of reach Of summer joy that was. All things that pass Are woman's tiring-glass; The faded lavender is sweet, Sweet the dead violet Culled and laid by and cared for yet; The dried-up violets and dried lavender Still sweet, may comfort her, Nor need she cry Alas! All things that pass Are wisdom's looking-glass; Being full of hope and fear, and still Brimful of good or ill, According to our work and will; For there is nothing new beneath the sun; Our doings have been done, And that which shall be was.
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9.4k
Passing And Glassing
I saw my world again through your eyes As I would see it again through your children's eyes. Through your eyes it was foreign. Plain hedge hawthorns were peculiar aliens, A mystery of peculiar lore and doings. Anything wild, on legs, in your eyes Emerged at a point of exclamation As if it had appeared to dinner guests In the middle of the table. Common mallards Were artefacts of some unearthliness, Their wooings were a hypnagogic film Unreeled by the river. Impossible To comprehend the comfort of their feet In the freezing water. You were a camera Recording reflections you could not fathom. I made my world perform its utmost for you. You took it all in with an incredulous joy Like a mother handed her new baby By the midwife. Your frenzy made me giddy. It woke up my dumb, ecstatic boyhood Of fifteen years before. My masterpiece Came that black night on the Grantchester road. I ****** the throaty thin woe of a rabbit Out of my wetted knuckle, by a copse Where a tawny owl was enquiring. Suddenly it swooped up, splaying its pinions Into my face, taking me for a post.
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7.9k
The Owl
While I don't suffer, or suffer from Normal, eurocentrism, northern malaise, Nor, academia, a blood disease, I do mind manners in which doings And not doings are done or aren't, As it brings life and light to them, Or it doesn't, for those most attached To living or dying are most closely death. This while acid rain from your closed eye And an acre of rainforest falls each second. Thus Earth's tears bleed for all you see is gray. As machinations of travailing winds, Miraging, veil, mirror narcissistic nihlistic False-ego as self, do "..we(e),.." evince to be? A republican chides, "put another poet On the barbie", his idea of conservation. Prump has had his exec. branch criminally: Edit the official video and script of his Helsinki news conference where tutin was asked, "Did you help prump become president and did you Have your gov't do the same", with tutin's answers, "Yes I did, yes, I did..." + premeditatedly separate Latino families at the border to torture them, Dictate that "if they want to see their kids again They have to sign away their rights and leave". He just said, "don't believe what you hear, see", Almost a quote from Orwell's '1984', in which Is written, "this dictate of the gov't was most Important of all, don't believe what your ears Hear or your eyes see".  Since altright universe Invaders were installed in the Blackhouse we've Known things will only get worse, what other Reason could his "military parade in 11-18" be for Except military rule, will the American daymare end?
0
Aug 24, 2018
Aug 24, 2018 at 7:13 AM UTC
RumputiN, Underworld Crown
While I don't suffer, or suffer from Normal, eurocentrism, northern malaise, Nor, academia, a blood disease, I do mind manners in which doings And not doings are done or aren't, As it brings life and light to them, Or it doesn't, for those most attached To living or dying are most closely death. This while acid rain from your closed eye And an acre of rainforest falls each second. Thus Earth's tears bleed for all you see is gray. As machinations of travailing winds, Miraging, veil, mirror narcissistic nihlistic False-ego as self, do "..we(e),.." evince to be? A republican chides, "put another poet On the barbie", his idea of conservation. Prump has had his exec. branch criminally: Edit the official video and script of his Helsinki news conference where tutin was asked, "Did you help prump become president and did you Have your gov't do the same", with tutin's answers, "Yes I did, yes, I did..." + premeditatedly separate Latino families at the border to torture them, Dictate that "if they want to see their kids again They have to sign away their rights and leave". He just said, "don't believe what you hear, see", Almost a quote from Orwell's '1984', in which Is written, "this dictate of the gov't was most Important of all, don't believe what your ears Hear or your eyes see".  Since altright universe Invaders were installed in the Blackhouse we've Known things will only get worse, what other Reason could his "military parade in 11-18" be for Except military rule, will the American daymare end?
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34
Laying on the bed, reading your wedding invite. I recall the day you went silent and I threw my crown. Stepping down and lost myself. Today I let you go, my love. Not because I give up. I believe you cared and you still do. Your silence did cut through my flesh, Your strangeness burnt my heart. But here I stand today ready to let myself heal. Years of gathering broken pieces of my heart. My lost pieces of love, wailing to be found. Stranded I searched, and I still do. I held on to you, like a stubborn child. Your memories engraved, your doings encircling my thoughts. Strangely never remembering our fights, I was partial.   My heart wanted more, my soul was thirsty. I found pleasure in pain. I kept you alive. What a splendid journey, my love. The impeccable high of your addiction. As I drowned, I found myself. One day I chose to revisit my past. Regretting the time lost to stupid fights, blaming myself. I never felt, keeping you alive. Stupid were my acts, unreasonable was my anger. Childish were my demands. A sinner, at your altar I confess. Sleepless nights, result of a restless brain. Blaming you for the love I dreaded I deserved, For making me feel worthwhile. Keeping your memories alive, Redoing my past, for an escape. As the odds increased, so did my grief.   For the broken promises, and the endless thoughts. U left without a word, so did my Tears. You coward, I pushed myself to oblivion.   I saved our love when the world sympathised. I held on to respect, for u and our love. Wishing you the best, I kept u alive. My futile attempts to blame you, was a curse. A part of me found pleasure when they blamed you, My stupid selfish heart. But today I let you go my love, I allow myself to heal. You meant so much, you still do. But life is more than just you and me. A part of my soul is still with you, it’s yours now. Keep it safe my love. I’ll nurture what is left of it. As time flies by, I’ll heal. For a better tomorrow, for a better me. I’ll strive with a hollow heart and a partial soul. Thank you love, for the heat. For never cheating my heart. For the never ending  euphoria. I know u cared and you still do. When you found me, I found myself. For your breath of life, I’ll keep u alive. You made me believe in good. To Love someone more than my being. Surprised I’m to know my strength. Entwined souls, living in the moment. We headed together, Insane and reckless. Towards our predefined end.   I’m glad it was you and no one else. You were the one, my wildest decision. Oh my wings, my strength. But today love, I let you go. I was your princess. Now it's someone else. It’s time to put back my crown to rule. U won't be forgotten my love, but like any life chapter ours has come to an end.
0
Jul 28, 2016
Jul 28, 2016 at 5:31 AM UTC
I let you go
Laying on the bed, reading your wedding invite. I recall the day you went silent and I threw my crown. Stepping down and lost myself. Today I let you go, my love. Not because I give up. I believe you cared and you still do. Your silence did cut through my flesh, Your strangeness burnt my heart. But here I stand today ready to let myself heal. Years of gathering broken pieces of my heart. My lost pieces of love, wailing to be found. Stranded I searched, and I still do. I held on to you, like a stubborn child. Your memories engraved, your doings encircling my thoughts. Strangely never remembering our fights, I was partial.   My heart wanted more, my soul was thirsty. I found pleasure in pain. I kept you alive. What a splendid journey, my love. The impeccable high of your addiction. As I drowned, I found myself. One day I chose to revisit my past. Regretting the time lost to stupid fights, blaming myself. I never felt, keeping you alive. Stupid were my acts, unreasonable was my anger. Childish were my demands. A sinner, at your altar I confess. Sleepless nights, result of a restless brain. Blaming you for the love I dreaded I deserved, For making me feel worthwhile. Keeping your memories alive, Redoing my past, for an escape. As the odds increased, so did my grief.   For the broken promises, and the endless thoughts. U left without a word, so did my Tears. You coward, I pushed myself to oblivion.   I saved our love when the world sympathised. I held on to respect, for u and our love. Wishing you the best, I kept u alive. My futile attempts to blame you, was a curse. A part of me found pleasure when they blamed you, My stupid selfish heart. But today I let you go my love, I allow myself to heal. You meant so much, you still do. But life is more than just you and me. A part of my soul is still with you, it’s yours now. Keep it safe my love. I’ll nurture what is left of it. As time flies by, I’ll heal. For a better tomorrow, for a better me. I’ll strive with a hollow heart and a partial soul. Thank you love, for the heat. For never cheating my heart. For the never ending  euphoria. I know u cared and you still do. When you found me, I found myself. For your breath of life, I’ll keep u alive. You made me believe in good. To Love someone more than my being. Surprised I’m to know my strength. Entwined souls, living in the moment. We headed together, Insane and reckless. Towards our predefined end.   I’m glad it was you and no one else. You were the one, my wildest decision. Oh my wings, my strength. But today love, I let you go. I was your princess. Now it's someone else. It’s time to put back my crown to rule. U won't be forgotten my love, but like any life chapter ours has come to an end.
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72
This ***** ****** They say that beauty is in the eyes of the Beholder, so does this ***** have eyes? the power of evil and bad, Today we see what it can do Many a nation have gone to war, Because of this ugly beauty, many family units has been tread apart Because of its evil doings, The seven hundred wives of King Solomon and his three Hundred concubines was a great example of what the ugly beauty can do: Infidelity is on the rise, so many lies: so many shortcoming, Lucy ****** is an embarrassing subject why men lie and killed for it? this remarkable commodity: with ****** is like a Van Gogh painting, It gets lot of attention: the baseline dimensions is still a mystery: A weapon so powerful It can break a man down to his lowest It has a language of its own. silly words like sup, sup, sup. the same sound effects of a cold beer going down the gullets: the smoother, the  esophagus: pleasers The ****** and a beer have so much in common they both get their men all the time, a smooth transportation, in addition, the lamentation, ****** you are surely blissful: Men incredible dreams who wouldn’t want to own the team? No matter how destructive or fulfilling: ** Ô, the wine of a woman from heaven is sent, more perfect than all that a man can invent.” ― Roman Payne** Quote
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Apr 29, 2018
Apr 29, 2018 at 2:07 PM UTC
This ***** ******
Nostradamus and sleeping prophet's One lost image of the singular Eye Re(ad(d): No worry To, Love Our Sun :). Signs like Gemini is to air Sagittarius is to fire a pair in this crossing with Pisces to water is Virgo for earth too We are the mutable ones!! Sunny is however we coin the calling spiraling too EYE of the One generation transmutable souls of soil ARE to earth; 'hues EYED like a butterfly, here to sample many flowers connected within a Great Spirit invoked as in wilds if peopled or things'!!! We do feel it within or without the actual considerations of the ultimate doings; 'letting go and taking the risk of trusting and depending on another'!!! One by one!!! :) EYE of humus hued in spirit and love fused to the stone's twirling and of the ruse's tolling So many of paths we traverse here as on earth the singular EYE knows out on the HORIZON The great Eye is too glued on Sunny Sun's ever evolving viewing's as hued spirits cross          EYE'S Our blinded one eye's longing to Lyra's lyre, great musician Orpheus winging, whose           W music tamed wild beasts, caused rivers to stop flowing and enchanted even gates                    S to the Lord of the Dead Hades, the softly lit fire singing inside linking heaven                            A               to earth viewed from outsider's hues waxing and waning of sleep wakened                              I N so ode to the moon in the darkness of night gives but who takes her softer                               F USED delight when One day halves by sun setting all ebbs in flowing as tides                                       B I            to Great oceans moved like hearts breathe air to presence's emoting                                              STAR'S   from magic to tragic we long of ecliptic traces cryptically erasing                                                      W the blindness of memory and sight' majestic beast's floundering                                                            I a forever crisscrossed from the One Eye here now to Knight's                                                                N dear lost forbidden inner retreats from the East to God's lost                                                                     'S children cast out to the land from blood pooling in spoils                                                                        O as easily uncovered as readily as new western lands had                                 ~/ E \~                               N   claim maddened ravaged savagely eagerly discovered                                 ~(:YES :)~                          G fear still rocks this boat with hope still sailing onward                                (:FORGIVEN:).                       'S
0
Oct 8, 2012
Oct 8, 2012 at 7:52 PM UTC
Columbus's Crossing
Nostradamus and sleeping prophet's One lost image of the singular Eye Re(ad(d): No worry To, Love Our Sun :). Signs like Gemini is to air Sagittarius is to fire a pair in this crossing with Pisces to water is Virgo for earth too We are the mutable ones!! Sunny is however we coin the calling spiraling too EYE of the One generation transmutable souls of soil ARE to earth; 'hues EYED like a butterfly, here to sample many flowers connected within a Great Spirit invoked as in wilds if peopled or things'!!! We do feel it within or without the actual considerations of the ultimate doings; 'letting go and taking the risk of trusting and depending on another'!!! One by one!!! :) EYE of humus hued in spirit and love fused to the stone's twirling and of the ruse's tolling So many of paths we traverse here as on earth the singular EYE knows out on the HORIZON The great Eye is too glued on Sunny Sun's ever evolving viewing's as hued spirits cross          EYE'S Our blinded one eye's longing to Lyra's lyre, great musician Orpheus winging, whose           W music tamed wild beasts, caused rivers to stop flowing and enchanted even gates                    S to the Lord of the Dead Hades, the softly lit fire singing inside linking heaven                            A               to earth viewed from outsider's hues waxing and waning of sleep wakened                              I N so ode to the moon in the darkness of night gives but who takes her softer                               F USED delight when One day halves by sun setting all ebbs in flowing as tides                                       B I            to Great oceans moved like hearts breathe air to presence's emoting                                              STAR'S   from magic to tragic we long of ecliptic traces cryptically erasing                                                      W the blindness of memory and sight' majestic beast's floundering                                                            I a forever crisscrossed from the One Eye here now to Knight's                                                                N dear lost forbidden inner retreats from the East to God's lost                                                                     'S children cast out to the land from blood pooling in spoils                                                                        O as easily uncovered as readily as new western lands had                                 ~/ E \~                               N   claim maddened ravaged savagely eagerly discovered                                 ~(:YES :)~                          G fear still rocks this boat with hope still sailing onward                                (:FORGIVEN:).                       'S
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32
Life is crazy when you like someone and they don’t feel the same. You spend all this time and energy proving to them that you’re not the same, As the other people they messed with in the past. It’s so sad; to expect something so great, end up with nothing. Feeling so empty, guilty That you took a chance with someone who’s not worthy Of being with you. You, the one who started this all, from that first moment when that tear started to fall. You claimed you were sorry and you can do better next time, but you ran out of chances. Time is up, and she gave up, on you and those summer romances. When you find someone who is ready, who has their life together, and who is steady Then, you will truly be happy Until then, think back to all the people you been with, are you in any fault. You claim it was their wrong doing, and they were the ones ******** Buying items that were never bought, to you in your procession, the progression Of your relationship started to fall. Did you give up, or did you end up forgiving them Of all their wrong doings. See not all of us are saints, we all strive for happiness even when were shooting Blanks, no I mean into an empty barrel of love. You know, the one that cupid missed to go along with all your love and happiness. Sometimes being by your self is so bliss, calm, so serene like it doesn’t exist. But, every once and awhile you feel that your miss-ing out on something Or someone Life is crazy, but we must not get lazy, nor give up. Your knight and shining armor; your dream girl is just Outside knocking on the door. Open it, a be ready for what’s in store Goodluck
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Jan 24, 2013
Jan 24, 2013 at 8:40 PM UTC
Life is Crazy...
Life is crazy when you like someone and they don’t feel the same. You spend all this time and energy proving to them that you’re not the same, As the other people they messed with in the past. It’s so sad; to expect something so great, end up with nothing. Feeling so empty, guilty That you took a chance with someone who’s not worthy Of being with you. You, the one who started this all, from that first moment when that tear started to fall. You claimed you were sorry and you can do better next time, but you ran out of chances. Time is up, and she gave up, on you and those summer romances. When you find someone who is ready, who has their life together, and who is steady Then, you will truly be happy Until then, think back to all the people you been with, are you in any fault. You claim it was their wrong doing, and they were the ones ******** Buying items that were never bought, to you in your procession, the progression Of your relationship started to fall. Did you give up, or did you end up forgiving them Of all their wrong doings. See not all of us are saints, we all strive for happiness even when were shooting Blanks, no I mean into an empty barrel of love. You know, the one that cupid missed to go along with all your love and happiness. Sometimes being by your self is so bliss, calm, so serene like it doesn’t exist. But, every once and awhile you feel that your miss-ing out on something Or someone Life is crazy, but we must not get lazy, nor give up. Your knight and shining armor; your dream girl is just Outside knocking on the door. Open it, a be ready for what’s in store Goodluck
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27
Who are you to say that you know me better than everyone else? Even my shadow is unaware of my doings when I enter the darkness.
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Nov 9, 2014
Nov 9, 2014 at 8:55 AM UTC
The shadow that follows me.
Sometimes I trust my instinct, but it tells me to do things in ways that no one dares It can implore me there, to take paths no one walks I fear the fresh footsteps I make on the new brick road I'm a social animal, a human; doing what others do seems the right thing to do Once you're a bit different, society condemns They raise an eyebrow, they don't give their consent; But I've seen great people do great things Because they had faith in their instincts. They have the drive to keep going, To try and even fail. I'd very much like to do the same, At least I have real control over my own doings. If I succeed, I have only my instincts to celebrate. If I fail, I have only my flaws to blame. Everything under my possession, Ne te quaesiveris extra, as they say It's your life to do, your life to bear.
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Nov 30, 2018
Nov 30, 2018 at 1:02 PM UTC
Trust your own instincts.
your words so sweet they rotten your teeth. guzzling up your lies so we wont see. it'll be a battle to the death of our dignity. a fight between just you and just me. who will be the first to commit the worst? actions so painful but the memories more like knife work. they'll fade away and only be remembered as plastered faces. all that will remain are cigarettes with their lipstick traces. and to end with nothing but disposition, all those unaccredited good doings, all that wasted ambition. -dh
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Oct 21, 2014
Oct 21, 2014 at 11:48 PM UTC
Memories More Like Knife Work
When Winchester races first took their beginning It is said the good people forgot their old Saint Not applying at all for the leave of Saint Swithin And that William of Wykeham's approval was faint. The races however were fixed and determined The company came and the Weather was charming The Lords and the Ladies were satine'd and ermined And nobody saw any future alarming. — But when the old Saint was informed of these doings He made but one Spring from his Shrine to the Roof Of the Palace which now lies so sadly in ruins And then he addressed them all standing aloof. 'Oh! subjects rebellious! Oh Venta depraved When once we are buried you think we are gone But behold me immortal! By vice you're enslaved You have sinned and must suffer, ten farther he said. These races and revels and dissolute measures With which you're debasing a neighboring Plain Let them stand —You shall meet with your curse in your pleasures Set off for your course, I'll pursue with my rain. Ye cannot but know my command o'er July Henceforward I'll triumph in shewing my powers Shift your race as you will it shall never be dry The curse upon Venta is July in showers—.
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3.4k
When Winchester Races
I swear I love her, I.... I swear I love her but I don't understand why I wanna fuvk all the others She heavy on my mind **** I’m alwayz thinkin of her But I'm kissing on this stranger plus forgot to use a rubber My actions is on my conscious, thinkin my doings are nonsense don’t know how she has a concept of me being honest I promise I'll never lie but she sees the truth in my eyez don't even know why I lie but I do it all the time The truth is alwayz clear but the proof is never there Her pain jus disappears like magic and smoke & mirrors.... **** **** I need her, **** **** I need her I deceive her & she knows it **** I can't fuvkin believe her Cuz she rather be with me than being all alone But I swear she was doing good until I came along Valerie's misery seems to be lead from me but she won't leave and that's a total mystery
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Aug 19, 2018
Aug 19, 2018 at 1:33 PM UTC
Valerie
The opening eyes of the infant flickered from here to there, Taking in the world as it passed by, The sapling grew into a tree in the blink of an eye, People came and people went, Memories of their ghosts with some others stayed behind, The infant faintly recalled what the reflection he saw in the mirror looked like, It saw the mirrors change with its reflection, The people behind him grew older like it, He began to forget things that had been, But ghosts of his doings and things occurred haunting his mind, And as came near the end of time, It reflected upon who it had become.
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Nov 12, 2012
Nov 12, 2012 at 8:08 PM UTC
Lifetime in a Flicker
There once was a Queen who ruled a magical land.
 She reigned with an iron fist on a dainty hand.
 This Queen was much too mean with servants so humble
 who kissed her feet while she only would grumble.
 “I’ve had enough!” She said, her fists in the air, 
her eyes of wicked flame, snakes in her hair! 
What made this great Queen so wicked and bitter? 
They all knew what made her skin shiver. 
With looks of a tainted angel, this Queen was so mad. 
There was no joy in her kingdom to be had.
 T’was the doings of a man that made her this way 
the Queen learned the hard way how evil they play.
 How they twist, choke, slaughter and destroy a whole heart, 
only after making art and breaking her apart. 
So, in rage, this Queen commanded:
 “Bring me the man who caused my pain!” She demanded. 
As they brought him to her, she cackled with delight.
 They all would witness an awful sight!
 Everyone knew he’d wind up dead.
 “The blade!” She screamed. “Now sever his head!”
 And with that, the blade fell with a sudden: WHACK! 
And with a satisfied grin, the Queen wore black.
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Nov 16, 2013
Nov 16, 2013 at 6:36 PM UTC
Revenge.
You praised my heart and helping hand And for the longest time I could not understand How any of that could make me special Until you used those words to describe her And how perfect she is. And that is the paragraph on how you broke my heart for the first time ever. But even in my darkest hour, my darkest day Your doings could not take my humor away. I am more than what you did to me, I am more than what you made me feel. Even when you broke my heart I could not be mean enough to try and tear you apart. I cried so many tears, But for the next few years I wished you only the best. Even after you left that gaping hole Right there in the very centre of my soul, I could not hate you, never hate you Because I loved you, always loved you Beyond your kind heart and helping hands Your everlasting patience and my high demands You understood me like no one else had ever done You listened to me when I was undone You cared for me when I broke down And then you took my heart, my very crown. You broke my heart, my spirit, my pride But the one thing you could never take from me is my reflex to fight I'll fight your impact, your demeanour, what you made me feel I'll reclaim what you took me from me and reveal Once and for all what I know to be my greatest strength My love for myself. And that can really For real Unlike you And what I once allowed myself to feel for you Last the entire length.
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Sep 30, 2018
Sep 30, 2018 at 9:37 PM UTC
Fighting Fire
As I travel back to my younger days, I remember my occluded mind. The doings of neighbourhood and community, Being taught always, Darkness is sorrow, White light is where Peace and beauty you'll find... That black shirt needs no washing, As you cannot see its furrow, White ones should be cared... Hide yourselves with a black cloth, Show yourself off to the world With an angel ring that's white.... My heart is about to rot, My mind with agony was already whirled, I shall now began to fight, For my skin Is dark, But is brighter than your soul...
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Jul 2, 2020
Jul 2, 2020 at 1:03 PM UTC
The colour of my soul
# *Subdued,  into a constriction; Young  adolescent spirits were meant to grow.. meant  to  breathe. The "Fires of Hell" are the doings  of man based  on the fears of man and the need to control. Little child,  running wild "Forever"  is a stick to beat you down (Until the  wild  within you no longer  makes a sound) It is for Freedom's sake that you have now  been set free,  child* .       .       .   *In the "name" of the Father,   you were first   thrown to the ground Yet..  it is   in the Name of the Father also that Love came to town.* #
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Aug 1, 2023
Aug 1, 2023 at 10:47 AM UTC
..in the Name of the Father
Lovable I really wanna be Lovable Have someone who checks on me with little how are ya's or how ya doings But Im just ingnorable easily forgotten waiting for something to stick
0
Jan 8, 2013
Jan 8, 2013 at 11:39 AM UTC
Lovable
** insignificant- insignificant problems grand scheme- scope of things ignorance and over concern expectations of so much aggravation, frustration, complaints- complications the wish and desire for small change                                          so much more lack of care annoyance close minded unfair and unappreciated blame of others for my own doings no direction no motivation **
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Jul 18, 2011
Jul 18, 2011 at 12:40 PM UTC
blame game
i dont know what to think. i dont know what to do. i love him. right? yes, i do. but no, i dont, i can't. why am i still thinking about you? yes, he makes me smile, but, when im with him, i wish it were you by my side i wish it were you looking into my eyes, not him. the things he says to me, they make my heart melt but i think its because i hear them in your voice. i picture your lips moving and i am reminded of the way you lick your lips after every few words i remeber the effect the sparks that your words had on my heart and for some reason, i just dont feel them with him the way i did with you, especially when he tells me im beautiful. He gives me the world, but for some reason, it's just not enough. I know it sounds so selfish, but in reality, all i want is to be happy. i'm not happy. i can never sleep at night. the voices in my head keep me awake, sometimes, those voices tell me to forget about you and to continue being with him those, i consider those to be nightmares. but sometimes, those voices sound like your voice and like to repeat old memories in my brain slowly, but surely, drowing me. These waters im in continue to rise. so what should i do? contiune to go through the days, pretending im happy? or should i just find a way out? oh, i forgot, there is no way out. ever. I dont want to hurt him, yet I dont want to be in pain either, I want you to be happy, Yet i want to be the one to make you smile. So, i guess i'll stay here, stuck in the mess of emotions, while the waters im in continue to rise eventually drowning me in my own thoughts, wrong doings, and my own pity. when will i be able to just breathe?
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Jan 14, 2014
Jan 14, 2014 at 11:43 AM UTC
just breathe
i dont know what to think. i dont know what to do. i love him. right? yes, i do. but no, i dont, i can't. why am i still thinking about you? yes, he makes me smile, but, when im with him, i wish it were you by my side i wish it were you looking into my eyes, not him. the things he says to me, they make my heart melt but i think its because i hear them in your voice. i picture your lips moving and i am reminded of the way you lick your lips after every few words i remeber the effect the sparks that your words had on my heart and for some reason, i just dont feel them with him the way i did with you, especially when he tells me im beautiful. He gives me the world, but for some reason, it's just not enough. I know it sounds so selfish, but in reality, all i want is to be happy. i'm not happy. i can never sleep at night. the voices in my head keep me awake, sometimes, those voices tell me to forget about you and to continue being with him those, i consider those to be nightmares. but sometimes, those voices sound like your voice and like to repeat old memories in my brain slowly, but surely, drowing me. These waters im in continue to rise. so what should i do? contiune to go through the days, pretending im happy? or should i just find a way out? oh, i forgot, there is no way out. ever. I dont want to hurt him, yet I dont want to be in pain either, I want you to be happy, Yet i want to be the one to make you smile. So, i guess i'll stay here, stuck in the mess of emotions, while the waters im in continue to rise eventually drowning me in my own thoughts, wrong doings, and my own pity. when will i be able to just breathe?
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Thoughts of you drift daily through my mind. Images created from your doings that made me who I am. Mother,  my infinite support and guiding light. Inspired by you, I tread my sometime rocky path. Remembering your advice, 'keep pushing on'. To the next adventure, experience created. Still the floating thoughts arrive to mold The future that awaits me and my journeys end.
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Mar 15, 2015
Mar 15, 2015 at 1:00 PM UTC
Mothers day remembering
He stops to smile He becomes a statue No gestures of love No Darling I love you... Must be my mistake My words , my doings, What I did wrong? He remains speechless Expressionless Dumb like a still picture That boring face.. Sulking of course... I'd leave you fighting with your own emotions I am drowning in my own thoughts to hack the statue of you is there a way to break this solid rock? is there a way to  melt a cold hearted soul? soon.. I'd break you Soon I'd melt you I would find out... When there's a will There's a way...
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Feb 12, 2014
Feb 12, 2014 at 4:04 AM UTC
Statue...
walking down childish roads I weep spotting something rotten a tree & I wonder before tying my shoes in a church guarded by senile eyes I think to myself why must I hold in my fleshy heart one becomes itself. & below after years of walking & soaking structures & small soiled gatherers I see teal stained pages smeared red, white with the doings of our past only needing a page in books to breed fear in rosy hope. looking before as a camera wants we fly into the upward quickly with enthusiasm a smile etches our glossy face & we see me someone is here on my road I stay calm next to me sets the biggest jaw I have or will see sure there are greater in numerous numbers strange unfathomable flanks ranking from mine created from my rust & our immense patience seeing or realizing there are strange silences between the peace you held. no I don't care
0
Jan 5, 2013
Jan 5, 2013 at 1:23 PM UTC
Clay