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M Vogel 7d

Ah, ****..
This Delta Variant
it almost just took me out
Too stubborn to drive to
the emergency room,
and then far, far  too sick.

There is a fever beyond
all description,  and a  death
with my name all over it.

There is a music that sustains..
voicetones  that are iconic
and a Magic that is threaded

   all the way through  
   every single part of it

Why can't I just die in peace?
You are standing there,  by the ocean;
Your love..  a beautiful haunting

I ain't got many friends left to talk to
nowhere to run when I'm in trouble
You know I'd do anything for you
stay the night, but keep it under cover

bring your mask xoxo
  Aug 16 M Vogel
and it feels nice to see you working around
back and forth back and forth
after a final foot forward
splashing behind
near a waterfall
giggling babe and a chuckling man
ran away into an epilogue
skinny dipping in the water back there
i tried to cover myself and my scars
but you pull my hand back and you pull my hair out of my face and you can see me
free bare wet and i can see you free bare wet
you say this is how you like me

my head swirls in cream
fresh air inhaled nostrils expand
so does my chest
in our bright youth
boulevards in my eye
the stones we crossed
the skies we drank
the cement we licked
locked eyes then
sitting under a moon
staring until i swoon
in galileo’s room

curled up to white
flows dreams brick and a brick
seemingly to know the words will not flow
there’s no body for you but mine—
somewhere to the blues and sleeping
in a bed made of cherry bark
or whatever you want to do—
i’ll let you make the rules
M Vogel Aug 15

You are in there,  I am certain of it--
Behind the gear's finely-honed,
precision fit..  gear
in to gear
in to gear

into gear..
And I wonder..  do you want out?
The machine  on the outside, self-repairs
Any attempt towards dismantle  from
the external,  is futile..
But the internal,  beautiful girl..

"I don't know what you mean, about 'machine'"
She is apprehensive, those beautiful
brown eyes,  looking up at me..
"Look down, sweet girl"
Her thighs, fully parted,  as I slide
in to her.. those amazing hips,
moving so perfectly with mine,  extracting..

Milking from me, my warm  pulsing *****--
a deeply-penetrating lubricant,  pulsed
deeply into the machine
As if to lubricate its gears..
As if..

But penetrating so deeply, as to now
permeate the insides  of the
mechanization's innerworkings--
turning from lubricant, to that
of a corrosive nature..
Fully coating now, the inner you..

as it turns back now, into that
of a healing balm
Bringing a to you moment of light  
and internal clarity--  
long enough for you to see

That the machine  is made vulnerable
by the ever-changing qualities  of
Love that found its way through
As the awakened parts within you, for the
first time.. understand
the machine's love-blocking, nature

And you begin to choose, mid-******
the machine's dismantle,  from the inside--

'Little by little..

Line, upon line..

Block, upon block..

Precept, upon precept..'

Until we have the chance,  once again..
to do it all again
the power of christ compels
  Aug 12 M Vogel
I wonder how the pattern goes --
how it feels when you exchange your own
for the mine moving in tight-rope missives
tilting puddles reflect half - forgotten
concrete ground

and grazed knees
and only metaphorical
simping daisies

Printed in damply lit skeleton leaves
their buyoning echoes leftover
in the taste of burnt toast and orange peels
delightedly picked apart in an air of snowflakes expected
to rest on the lonely ground

tanned and tinted by the ticking sun,
foaming at the constant brink of disappointment
blinking rainbow dot in tripping chains
in the corner of my eyelashes in the tears that
threat to fall

like all the black stars we painted
all the way down to his harlequin frown
on those poor porcelain masks we hung festively on our door
Red springing from the bulb-spread head
On cheeks and nose and lips and one shameless *****
Shivering between doll and med-fed clown

Who gasps anyway
his tongue alive and licking
in the rhythm of when i clack
when i walk,  sturdy, profile grinning,
straight into how i can feel your hands
clasping each of my underarms
and lifting me

slightly [fractured breeze beneath my feet]
and you kiss my neck
and you kiss my cheek

we danced one time in all my clumsy
assumption to ecstasy
and failing failing failing to quite perform it
but tapstepping across and clampering on
to a tangible cloud of imagination and
inordinately human perfection

and a loss, a disappearance of
the clinging agony
of all our expectation
  Aug 9 M Vogel
Dark Dream
of feeling
For you
I know
You will
  Aug 5 M Vogel
Though she once,
At the moment of her birth,
Shone with immeasurable light, 
Unadulterated, unremitting, unashamed
Breaking the barriers of time and space
Wide-eyed emerging into that very first day
Unwrapping the shadowed arms of the other side

Though she proclaimed
I am here!
Like the brightest star,
Speaking with her spirit alone

Having not yet lost
The language of God

Though she was at that moment
Lifted into her place
Embraced by vast, light-laden arcs
Cast just right
A speck of hope within the wide
Galaxy of life

Though she emerged bright
And sure,

She fell

She plunged through a darkness that stole it all
Light years of cold
Voices that battered the
Stardust core
Of her soul

Until one day
At the edge of some endless abyss
She turned and tried to find her own star amongst the farthest
Reaches of the night sky,
Eyes seeking in the black,
And at last perceived the faintest glow,
A tiny spark from so many, many years ago,
A remnant of a little girl she once knew.

But the pain is just too far
And the cruel wind slaps at her reaching arms
And so she just steps back and lets herself fall

Away from the light.

Away from it all.
For my mom, for me, for all. How the darkness can carry us so far. Away. I still believe we were born of light, once.
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