Lift me up to the highest height,                                                          ­        
                                                                ­                                                
release me, I'm a bird in flight                                                           ­         
                                                                ­                                                      
Let the Earth's beauty fill me up,                                                              ­      
                                                                ­                                                    
until I'm breathless & had enough                                                           ­             
                                                   ­                                                                 ­   
Let me soar into the azure skies,                                                           ­   
                                                                ­                                                
spread my wings so I can fly,                                                             ­           
                                                     ­                                                               
with soft wings, I sail, gliding by                                                               ­                         
                                                                ­                                    
Everything is different way up here,                                                  
                                                                ­                                                  
the beauty of life is much more clear

I've been running around trying to change                                                      
    ­                                                                 ­                                              
   but found one mold doesn't always fit                                                              ­            
                                                                ­                                                
There's not a lot I can do about being strange                                                          ­              
                                                  ­                                                                 ­       
it is what it is & that is this,                                                            ­                        
                                        ­                                                                 ­               
I may not have the typical family,                                                          ­      
                                                                ­                                                      
I'm not ashamed of being me,                                                              ­                      
                                          ­                                                                 ­     
there's no reason for trying to be,                                                              ­              
                                                  ­                                                          
someone else other than me                                                               ­               
                                                                ­                                                      
I might not share your point of view,                                                  
         ­                                                                 ­                                    
that's because I'm me, not you                                                              ­            
                                                    ­                                                                 ­  
If we were to act exactly the same,                                                      
     ­                                                                 ­                                              
we may as well all have the same name                                                             ­           
                                                     ­                                                             
You­ might not like how I carry myself                                                  
        ­                                                                 ­                                               
but I don't want to be like everyone
else                                                          
                                                                ­                                                      
I like the differences I see in me,                                                              ­        
                                                                ­                                                      
I am not a clone or a wanna
be                                                               ­       
                                                         ­                                                         
You can point at me in judgement,                                                       ­                                   
                             ­                                                                 ­            
pretend you are heaven sent                                                             ­   
                                                             ­                                                     
But I know I have common sense,                                                           ­       
                                                         ­                                                             
I don't want to live a life as someone I resent

I open up my window & shades                                                           ­           
                                                                ­                                                      
and let the fresh air rush in                                                               ­                   
                                                                ­                                                      
Feel the sun's warmth on my face,                                                            ­    
                                                            ­                                                          
get ready for the day to begin                                                            ­                    
                                                                ­                                                  
Smell the fresh cut grass                                                            ­                          
                                      ­                                                                 ­               
see it's covered in dew                                                              ­                    
                                            ­                                                                 ­             
  a lemon lime zest draft,                                                           ­                       
                                                                ­                                                     
  I drink in the view                                                             ­                                         
                       ­                                                                 ­                          
The birds are outside singing,                                                         ­                   
                                                                ­                                                        
the tree's rustling in the breeze                                                           ­               
                                                 ­                                                                 ­
All the while I'm saying                                                           ­                   
                                             ­                                                               
Thank you, God, it's heavenly

The sparkle in her eyes,                                                            ­                      
                                          ­                                                                 ­           
get fainter every day,                                                             ­                     
                                           ­                                                                 ­            
no one can deny,                                                            ­                                                      
                                                                ­                                                      
that she's fading away                                                             ­                           
                                     ­                                                                 ­  
Sometimes she doesn't speak,                                                           ­           
                                                                ­                                                
there're times she won't eat                                                              ­                          
                                                                ­                                                      
We watch her grow weak,                                                            ­                  
                                              ­                                                                 ­       
as we tend to her needs                                                            ­                  
                                                                ­                                            
There're days she lays in bed all day,                                                             ­ 
                                                               ­                                                         
up inside her head it's okay                                                             ­               
                                                 ­                                                                 ­
Her memories become a haze,                                                            ­          
                                                      ­                                                  
bringing smiles that quickly fade                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                                      
I wonder what she's thinking today,                                                           ­ 
                                                                ­                                                  
you never know what she'll say                                                              ­          
                                                                ­                                                  
Her skin like tissues in my hands,                                                           ­     
                                                           ­                                                       
she says things we don't understand                                                       ­     
                                                           ­                                                       
  We all love her the best we can,                                                             ­ 
                                                                ­                                                
she is such a strong woman                                                            ­                
                                                ­                                                          
  Pict­ures of family on the wall,                                                            ­        
                                                                ­                                          
  nursing station down the hall                                                             ­           
                                                                 ­                                                 
We can't invoke new memories                                                         ­                                       
                         ­                                                                 ­                        
but that doesn't stop us from trying                                                           ­ 
                                                                ­                                      
Some day's we feel like crying,                                                          ­          
                                                                ­                                              
while we love her while she's dying

With a head full of anger, a heart filled with rage,                                  
                         ­                                                                 ­                            
she ran away from home at an early age,                                                
            ­                                                                 ­                                         
she headed to Hollywood to take the center stage,                                      
                    ­                                                                 ­                                   
a predictable ending before the last page                                                    
        ­                                                                 ­                                             
She spent all her money on a ticket there,                                                  
        ­                                                                 ­                                             
she didn't make plans, she didn't care                                                             ­ 
                                                                ­                                                      
Just the kind of person ripe for abuse,                                                           ­     
                                                           ­                                                                 ­ vulnerable, scared & very confused                                                         ­                                           
                                                                ­                                                  
He bought her dinner, she sold her soul,                                                            ­                  
                                              ­                                                                 ­   
she dressed the part & played the role                                                          
                                                                ­                                                
Now she walks the track, every night of the week,                                                            ­  
                                                              ­                                                  
does as she's told, listens when he speaks                                                
                                                                ­                                                 
 She longs for the life she used to have,                                                        
                                                                ­                                            
misses her mom, misses her dad                                                              ­                                                                
The drugs he gives her, numbs the pain                                                             ­                           
                                                                ­                                                  
from when he beats her, calls her names                                                    
                                                                ­                                                  
The stories she could tell you, things she's seen                                          
                  ­                                                                 ­                           
make her look much older than seventeen

It's been a long time since you loved me,                                                        
                                                                ­                                                    
   even longer since you held my hand,                                                      
     ­                                                                 ­                                                
my walls are working perfectly,                                                       ­                 
                                               ­                                                                 ­          
now I don't give into your demands                                                          ­        
                                                        ­                                                                
  I don't think often about you                                                              ­      
                                                                ­                                                        
  or the way you made me feel,                                                      
     ­                                                                 ­                                    
convinced myself I don't love you,                                                            
                                                                ­                                                        
 It was the only way I'd heal                                                             ­                                   
                             ­                                                                 ­                  
Why did have to come over here,                                                        
                                                                ­                                            
telling me that you still care?                                                            ­              
                                                  ­                                                      
Showing me, eyes filled with tears,                                                  
                                                                ­                                                  
you never did play fair                                                             ­                       
                                                                ­                                                    
I'd be a fool to let it get to me                                                               ­         
                                                                ­                                                  
and be your victim once again                                                            ­                          
                                                                ­                                              
When it's all been done, I'd rather be,                                                              ­        
                                                        ­                                                  
someone else than who I've been                                                             ­     
                                                                ­                                                  
 I'd like to think I learned a thing or two                                                      
                                                                ­                                                    
in the time we've been apart,                                                           ­           
                                                     ­                                                                 ­
I can't fall back in love with you,                                                             ­               
                                                 ­                                                             
you­'re no good for my heart

I don't know why I cried,                                                           ­                       
                                                                ­                                                  
when you walked away,                                                            ­                          
                                                                ­                                                        
I felt like we had died,                                                            ­                            
                                    ­                                                                 ­               
long before that dark day                                                              ­                    
                                            ­                                                                 ­         
    I think I was still holding                                                          ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                        
on to a sweet memory                                                           ­                           
                                                                ­                                                        
as I felt my heart folding,                                                         ­                             
                                   ­                                                                 ­                     closing in around me                                                               ­                       
                                         ­                                                                 ­            
It had really hit me,                                                              ­                      
                                                                ­                                                 
that our love was gone                                                             ­                     
                                           ­                                                                 ­      
and I would then be                                                               ­                           
                                     ­                                                                 ­      
forever lonely & alone                                                            ­                      
                                          ­                                                                 ­       
My heart was aching                                                           ­                               
                                 ­                                                                 ­                
and no one really cared,                                                           ­                                     
                                                                ­                                              
inside I was shaking,                                                         ­                                  
                              ­                                                                 ­             
broken & scared                                                           ­                                   
                                                                ­                                                  
We both knew it was coming                                                           ­             
                                                   ­                                                                 ­
but let it happen anyway,                                                          ­                
                                                ­                                                                
both hell- bent on burning                                                          ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                     
the one we loved in every way                                                              ­                     
                                           ­                                                                 ­          
a lesson worth learning                                                         ­                               
                                 ­                                                                 ­              
look at what we've done today

Laugh loudly, walk proudly,                                                         ­                           
                                                                                                              
     dance around till you fall down,                                                            ­          
                                                                ­                                                  
smile until it hurts your face,                                                            ­                                      
                          ­                                                                 ­                                   move your body, don't stay in one place,                                                           ­                       
                                         ­                                                                 ­          
sing even if you know you're bad,                                                             ­   
                                                             ­                                                         
tell dumb jokes & be stupid glad,                                                      
                                                                ­                                                  
drink wine, get buzzed,                                                          ­                              
                                  ­                                                                 ­                 
give a total stranger a hug,                                                             ­                                   
                                                                ­                                                        
      wear something you never would                                                            ­              
                                                  ­                                                                 ­ 
act a fool, you know you should,                                                          ­      
                                                          ­                                                        
this is my recipe for fun,                                                             ­                                                                 ­                                                    
                                                                ­                                                    
go ahead & get yourself some

She comes at him, hot flushed face                                                             ­       
                                                         ­                                                           
  She's throwing things all over the place                                                    
       ­                                                                 ­                                              
Her eyes are wide & mostly black,                                                           ­     
                                                           ­                                                      
 facing her enemy, about to attack                                                           ­                                 
                                                                ­                                                     
 She pushes away a strand of hair,                                                            ­  
                                                              ­                                                
making   a scene & does not care                                                             ­           
                                                                ­                                                      
Just found out, he's cheating again                                                            ­
                                                                ­                                                      
and making sure he knows he's sinned                                                           ­                               
                                                                ­                                                
She's screaming, bringing the house down,                                                            ­                                  
                                                                ­                                              
along with anything else that's around                                              
                                                                ­                                              
While she's cursing up a blue streak,                                                    
                                                                ­                                                      
a thrown book makes him shriek                                                           ­         
                                                       ­                                                         
Even after what he's done to her,                                                             ­ 
                                                                ­                                                  
he's wondering what just occurred,                                                        ­        
                                                                ­                                                  
he's sure she will come back easily,                                                          ­  
                                                                ­                                                  
just like before, so greedily                                                         ­                   
                                                                ­                                                  
He can't let go; he can't hold on                                                               ­         
                                                                ­                                                  
but for her, that loves long gone

Every lie you say to me,                                                              ­                          
                                                                ­                                                  
every infidelity,                                                      ­                                              
                  ­                                                                 ­                               
taints another memory                                                           ­                           
                                     ­                                                                 ­               
 and you are slowly killing me                                                               ­                                       
                                                                ­                                                      
You have filled my heart with hate,                                                            ­                              
                                                                ­                                                  
every time you come home late,                                                            ­          
                                                                ­                                                      
  my heart & head has to debate,                                                          ­              
                                                  ­                                                                 ­   
  you always end up second rate                                                             ­       
                                                         ­                                                       
Why didn't you just walk away?                                                            ­              
                                                  ­                                                              
  ­How can you treat me this way?                                                             ­     
                                                           ­                                                     
  You want your cake & eat it too,                                                             ­   
                                                                ­                                                 
 and **** you got a big, sweet tooth                                                        
                                                                ­                                                  
She didn't take you away from me,                                                              ­
                                                                ­                                                      
I will give you to her, gladly                                                           ­                     
                                           ­                                                                 ­    
then I will sit back just to see,                                                             ­               
                                                                ­                                                
what happens when she becomes like me

Like a tape player on rewind,                                                          ­              
                                                                ­                                                      
          ­                                                                 ­                                           
 I see it all clearly in  my mind,                                                     ­                             
                                                                ­                                          
memories flash before aged eyes                                                             ­             
                                                   ­                                                                 ­    
                                                                ­                                                    
of the things I lived before I die,                                                             ­     
                                                                ­                                                        
  I see my children, small & frail,                                                           ­           
                                                                ­                                    
acknowledge attempts that I 've failed                                                           ­                               
                                 ­                                                                 ­                    
that I would have done differently,                                                     ­       
                                                                ­                                                        
in the life of another me                                                               ­                 
                                                                ­                                                      
  I remember first days at school                                                           ­           
                                                     ­                                                       
  picnics­ at the swimming pool                                                             ­     
                                                           ­                                                             
  all of those wonderful
memories                                                         ­           
                                                                ­                                                 
 and others not so
pleasantly                                                       ­               
                                                                ­                                                      
I remember how love can hurt                                                             ­           
                                                     ­                                                              
 of things that were far worse                                                            ­            
                                                    ­                                                              
All of this pain I pushed away                                                             ­         
                                                       ­                                                             
to remember another day                                                              ­            
                                                    ­                                                                 ­ 
I hope if that day comes,                                                           ­                                     
                                                                ­                                                      
I can stand up & be the one                                                              ­              
                                                  ­                                                                
­ that is so convincingly                                                     ­                 
                                                                ­                                                                 ­       
another version, another me

I am not a writer, I 'm a prisoner in my head,                                              
                                                                ­                                          
compelled to think, to write, what is being said                                                             ­       
                                                                ­                                                
Feeling too much, it comes pouring out of me.                                          
                                                                ­                                            
bleeding onto pages, demons exorcised from me

Broken glass on the floor,                                                           ­                       
                                         ­                                                                 ­        
  holes punched through the door,                                                            ­                
                                                                ­                                                        
                                                                ­                                                    
all say I love you & more                                                             ­               
                                                                ­                                                        
to those who've been there before                                                           ­               
                                                 ­                                                             
Pictures out of the frames,                                                          ­          
                                                      ­                                                            
piled up ready for the flames                                                           ­             
                                                                ­                                                              Curse words & then your name                                                             ­     
                                                                ­                                                        
all in efforts to assign blame                                                            ­            
                                                    ­                                                              
Cell phones with cracked screens,                                                         ­   
                                                                ­                                              
police called to a domestic scene                                                            ­            
                                                    ­                                                    
Bleached clothes strewn in the tub                                                              ­    
                                                                ­                                                  
   all this has to be true love                                                             ­ 
                                                               ­                                             
Ripped clothes thrown on the floor                                                            ­            
                                                                ­                                              
along with your heart & more                                                             ­   
                                                                ­                                                  
All of this drama, what's it for?                                                             ­             
                                                   ­                                                             
This isn't love, it's settling a score

You are here right here with me,                                                              ­                    
                                            ­                                                                 ­ 
looking through, not at me                                                               ­                 
                                                                ­                                                      
We are suffering quietly,                                                         ­                   
                                                                ­                                                                 so much is said, silently                                                         ­                     
                                                                ­                                                      
The TV plays way too loud                                                             ­                 
                                               ­                                                                 ­      
You stomp your feet too proud                                                            ­  
                                                              ­                                                
  Neither of us is willing to do,                                                            
                                                                ­                                                
what's needed to get us through                                                          ­      
                                                          ­                                                        
You give me an icy glare,                                                           ­                   
                                             ­                                                     
interrupting my focused stare,                                                           ­                                           
                     ­                                                                 ­                  
slapping me into reality                                                          ­                            
                                    ­                                                                 ­               
of how bad it is between you &me                                                               ­   
                                                             ­                                                     
  The washer machine in the background,                                                      ­
                                                                ­                                              
   cleans up dirt without a sound                                                            ­  
                                                                ­                                                  
   But you & I can't get
by,                                                              ­                  
                                              ­                                                                 ­   
   our dirt gets materialized                                                     ­                 
                                                                ­                                            
   Behind the walls we are seen,                                                            ­          
                                                                ­                                                    
as a couple whose grass is green                                                            ­        
                                                                ­                                              
  While eating our dinner we fall apart.                                                           ­                                                       
         ­                                                                 ­                                        
  as we eat the other's hearts                                                           ­       
                                                                ­                                                 
 The fence is white & the flowers bloom.                                                
          ­                                                                 ­                                         
as we explode in the living room                                                             ­         
                                                       ­                                                           
The pictures hung so perfectly,                                                       ­             
                                                                ­                                                  
like we once used to be

I've tried but I can't get enough of you,                                                          
  ­                                                                 ­                                                     
no matter how I try, it will not do                                                        
                                                                ­                                                       
   When I see you smile, I can't contain mine                                                
                                                                ­                                                        
  I want to play it cool, but I lose my mind,                                                            ­
                                                                ­                                                      
Whenever we touch, I just want to feel.                                                      
     ­                                                                 ­                                    
something beautiful, something real                                                            
                                                                ­                                                      
My heart beats wildly when you're near,                            
                                                                ­                                          
whenever you whisper, "I want to be here"                                                      
                                                                ­                                              
  Wrap me in your arms, I'll melt into you.                                                    
        ­                                                                 ­                                         
Put your hand in mine, I love you                                                              ­                    
                                                                ­                                            
  Hold my face in your hands, when we kiss,                                                
                                                                ­                                                      
I won't close my eyes; I won't want to miss,                                                  
                                                                ­                                                  
any kind of look or sign that says to me                                                               ­                                                         
       ­                                                                 ­                                              
I love you as much as you love me

There are smiles you use to greet,                                                           ­                         
                                       ­                                                                 ­          
there are smiles when you meet                                                             ­           
                                                                ­                                                      
The kind that looks into your heart,                                                      
                                                                ­                                                      
that cause your pulse to skip a beat                                                             ­           
                                                                ­                                                      
The type that can ignite a flame,                                                           ­               
                                                 ­                                                                 ­      
so, you never feel the same                                                             ­             
                                                                ­                                                        
  A smile that reaches their eyes,                                                            ­              
                                                                ­                                                          
a kind of flirty surprise                                                         ­                             
                                                                ­                                            
There's the one reserved for you.                                                             ­                             
                                   ­                                                                 ­                  
a look that's shared by you two                                                              ­                
                                                                ­                                            
Where words are never said,                                                            ­              
                                                                ­                                                      
it is a look to be read                                                             ­                                                       
         ­                                                                 ­                                
between two lovers, privately.                                                       ­               
                                                                ­                                                     
 it looks like the one, you just gave to me

My heart looks like a crime scene,          
                                                                ­                                                        
   a victim of love bleeds profusely                                                        ­                
                                                ­                                                                 ­       
So many cuts inflicted on me,                                                              ­                    
                                                                ­                                                        
your love has left it's print on me                                                               ­ 
                                                               ­                                                     
Your weapon of words cut like a knife,                                          
                                                                ­                                              
causing me pain, threatening my life,                                                          
 ­                                                                 ­                                                  
only held together with caution tape,                                                
                                                                ­                                                
sealed with lies & bitter hate                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                                  
Hit & run, I am left dealing.                                                         ­             
                                                                ­                                                
with a heart that has no feeling                                                          ­        
                                                        ­                                                          
You are guilty, the jury is in                                                               ­           
                                                     ­                                                           
may you burn with others condemned

We are living together yet falling apart.                                                           ­       
                                                                ­                                                      
the word forever isn't written in our stars                                                          
 ­                                                                 ­                                        
Heartache is the only thing that we share,                                          
                ­                                                                 ­                                   
now nothing matters & no one cares                                                            ­    
                                                            ­                                                                I take from you, you take from me,                                                          
                                                                ­                                              
hurting each other deliberately                                                     ­                 
                                                                ­                                                        
So far gone we don't care to see,                                                             ­                 
                                                                ­                                                      
I'm killing you & you're killing me                                                               ­   
                                                                ­                                                  
You push my buttons & I push yours                                                            ­      
                                                                ­                                                    
so many times, we stopped keeping score                                                        
   ­                                                                 ­                                                  
  I keep on threatening to walk out that door,                                                      
                                                                ­                                            
you're screaming at me; I can't take anymore"                                                         ­                           
                                                                ­                                                      
I am ashamed of what we have become,                                                
         ­                                                                 ­                                            
but I have the sense to know we are done                                                        
                                                                ­                                            
Broken hearted, I'm standing my ground,                                                        
 ­                                                                 ­                                                
you are someone I can't be around                                                          
                                                                ­                                                      
I detach myself & I wrestle free,                                                            ­          
                                                                ­                                                      
  I got away, a small victory

How you rekindle a flame that's gone cold?                                                      
                                                                ­                                                        
                                                                ­                                                
  Play a bluff hand you know you should fold?                                                            ­          
                                                      ­                                                               
                                                                ­                                                
How do breathe life into a faded romance?                                                         ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                           
How do you know it's even worth the chance?                                                          ­                
                                                ­                                                                 ­     
Do you move on & start love anew,                                                            ­            
                                                    ­                                                                 ­   
or be true to what your hearts telling you?                                                  
                                                                ­                                                    
How do you convince someone to try again,                                                  
                                                                ­                                                  
when it's hard to even remain being friends?                                                  
      ­                                                                 ­                                         
How do you go about making the first move,                              
                                                                ­                                              
when you know they will just reject you?                                                      
      ­                                                                 ­                                            
You can tell yourself, maybe they feel the same                                                
            ­                                                                 ­                                     
but if not, you're opening up for pain                                                  
                                                                ­                                                    
So, you wait & another day goes by,                                                              ­  
                                                                ­                                                  
do you harden your heart or even try?                                                          
                                                                ­                                                 
 The longer you wait, the harder it becomes                                                          ­            
                                                                ­                                                    
till your loves gone forever, it's all come undone

When my heart was broken,                                                          ­                
                                                ­                                                                 ­       
    there was a boy who cared                                                            ­                
                                                                ­                                                        
   no words were louder spoken,                                                          ­          
                                                                ­                                                    
   than the flowers he shared                                                           ­                     
                                                                ­                                                        
  As I cried in my misery,                                                          ­                  
                                                                ­                                                        
he waited in the wings                                                            ­                                  
                                                                ­                                              
  Hoping one day he would be,                                                              ­                
                                                ­                                                                 ­     
my all, my everything                                                       ­                                 
                                                                ­                                                  
He focused his attention,                                                       ­                       
                                         ­                                                                 ­       
 and each & everyday,                                                        ­                            
                                    ­                                                                 ­               
he showed his affection,                                                       ­                           
                                                                ­                                                
with a floral bouquet                                                          ­                                  
                                                                ­                                                  
But so pained was I                                                                ­                            
                                                                ­                                                  
and blinded by hot tears,                                                           ­                     
                                           ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                             
I closed my swollen eyes,                                                            ­                
                                                ­                                                                 ­ 
and he then disappeared                                                      ­                                
                                                                ­                                             
 Lately he's been coming back to me,                                                          
   ­                                                                 ­                                  
sometimes in my dreams,                                                          ­                
                                                                ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                             
I can remember him vividly                                                          ­          
                                                                ­                                                
even though it's longer than it seems                                                            ­        
                                                        ­                                                          
He loved me then, now I see                                                              ­                
                                                                ­                                                 
 The boy with the flowers waiting,                                                         ­         
                                                       ­                                                             
for me to love him, patiently                                                        ­      
                                                                ­                                                                 ­                             
                                   ­                                  ,.

Those walls that you put up to protect you from everyone.                                                        ­                                             
                                                                ­                                                  
can isolate you from those who mean you no harm                                                             ­ 
                                                                ­                                           
I see you seeking safety and holding your breath                                              
                                                                ­                                                      
 but hiding from your life is like hiding from death                                        
                   ­                                                                 ­                            
  Sooner or later, something falls between the cracks                                            
                                                                ­                                                      
You only get one life, and you don't get yours back                                              
                                                                ­                                            
Everyone makes mistakes & you learn from them all,                                                        
                                                                ­                                                        
  so, knock down your barriers with a wrecking ball                                        
                                                                ­                                                
With tears comes growth & lessons learned                                                
         ­                                                                 ­                                    
Don't think that everyone   doesn't take their turn                                
                            ­                                                                 ­                           
I think it's true, that you reap what you sow,                                                  
                                                                ­                                                
plant a seed of trust and watch it grow                                                    
                                                                ­                                        
Embrace your life & proceed carefully,                                                       ­   
                                                             ­                                                       
no life is perfect & neither are we

I will be okay, she said to me                                                               ­                                                                 ­                                                           
wiping a tear off with her sleeve                                                           ­                                                 
                                                                ­                                              
blood shot eyes looking at me,                                                              ­        
                                                                ­                                              
smiling at me with false bravery                                                          ­              
                                                                ­                                                        Embarrassed by emotions shed,                                                            ­
                                                                ­                                                        
she put her hand on top of her head                                                            
                                                                ­                                              
Pushed me away & said,'' leave me alone''                                                          ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                      
I just need some time of my own                                                              ­  
                                                                ­                                                      
I did as she said out of respect,                                                         ­ 
                                                               ­                                                   
she reacted in a way I didn't expect,                                                          ­      
                                                                ­                                                  
she left the house, she was distraught,                                                      ­          
                                                                ­                                                      
I sat there, left with her thoughts                                                         ­       
                                                         ­                                                          
She was one of my best friends                                                          ­                          
                                      ­                                                                 ­         
after that day, never seen alive again                                                            ­      
                                                          ­                                                      
They found her after a few days                                                             ­           
                                                     ­                                                   
someone killed her in a bad way                                                              ­          
                                                                ­                                                      
I always felt responsible                                                      ­                                
                                ­                                                                 ­                 
but stopping her was impossible                                                       ­                 
                                               ­                                                                 ­      
If she had not run away,                                                            ­                          
                                      ­                                                                 ­           
she would still be here today                                                            ­                    
                                            ­                                                                 ­      
 So many things I wanted to say,                                                             ­     
                                                           ­                                                       
that may have changed that day                                                              ­    
                                                                ­                                                      
  I should have said,'' you can count on me''                                                    
                                                                ­                                                
That her friend, I would always be                                                  
                                                                ­                                                  
  and that if she ever fell apart,                                                           ­           
                                                     ­                                                             
that I would hold her broken heart,                                                           ­   
                                                             ­                                                   
until she was able to mend,                                                            ­            
                                                                ­                                                      
I loved her, she was my friend                                                           ­           
                                                     ­                                                           
now I am filled with, ''if only I's?"                                                            ­      
                                                          ­                                                        
and left with wondering why?

There's a long & winding road,                                                            ­
                                                                ­                                                 
 where for the price of your soul,                                                            ­            
                                                    ­                                                    
depression will give birth                                                            ­                                                 
                                                                ­                                                    
 It costs whatever you are worth                                                            ­                                                
   If you chose to reside,                                                          ­                              
                                                                ­                                                      
you better swallow your pride,                                                           ­         
                                                       ­                                                             
It'll take the strut from your stride,                                                          ­  
                                                                ­                                                
possess you from the inside                                                           ­                   
                                                                ­                                                  
It lives to take your voice,                                                           ­               
                                                                ­                                              
make you surrender your choice                                                           ­             
                                                   ­                                                                
                                                                ­                                                    
To dry all of your tears,                                                           ­                         
                                       ­                                                                 ­        
pain is music to its ears                                                             ­                   
                                                                ­                                                        It gathers it's strength,                                                        ­                            
                                                                ­                                                   
during your quick descent                                                          ­                                                                 ­                                     
                                                                ­                                                    
As you slowly wind down,                                                            ­                  
                                              ­                                                                 ­       
no solutions to be found                                                            ­                            
                                                                ­                                                  
The road is covered in vines,                                                           ­                   
                                                                ­                                          
growing fast over time                                                             ­                     
                                                                ­                                                    
don't find your way there,                                                           ­                         
                                                                ­                                                    
  it's the road to despair

You deserve to feel heartbreak,                                                      ­                    
                                            ­                                                                 ­           
be forced to give, not take                                                             ­       
                                                                ­                                                      
                                                                ­                                                      
I want you to feel devastation,                                                     ­               
                                                                ­                                                        
be put in awkward situations                                                       ­                           
                                                                ­                                                      
You should endure deep pain,                                                            ­              
                                                                ­                                                    
have it inflicted again & again                                                            ­              
                                                  ­                                                                
None of that will even come close,                                                           ­ 
                                                               ­                                                         
to what you gave me, what you chose                                                            ­          
                                                      ­                                                            
You should feel how it feels to cry,                                                            
                                                                ­                                          
wonder why I am not home at night,                                                        
  ­                                                                 ­                                               
ask yourself a million times, why?                                                             ­ 
                                                                ­                                                
  keep getting up to look outside                                                          ­            
                                                                ­                                                  
You need to walk a mile in my shoes,                                                          
­                                                                 ­                                             
while my decisions cause you to lose                                                             ­ 
                                                                ­                                              
Have your heart shatter like glass,                                                           ­       
                                                         ­                                                               
  get no answers, but continue to ask                                                              ­  
                                                                ­                                      
Screamed at by me while your frustration rises,                                                
          ­                                                                 ­                                         
as I cover up truths with fake disguises,                                                       ­               
                                                 ­                                                               
  look at you boldly while I am lying                                                        
   ­                                                                 ­                                            
This is what you have done to me,                                                    
                                                                ­                                                  
  this is the love that I have seen

You're cold & callous, a mega *****                                                            ­        
                                                        ­                                                          
and that's not even the half of it                                                               ­                                                
                                                                ­                                                
hope you get what's coming to you                                                              ­                          
                                      ­                                                                 ­               
but that is not for me to do                                                               ­             
                                                                ­                                                  
You'll hang yourself when you're through                                          
               ­                                                                 ­                                        
and I don't feel sorry for you                                                              ­                  
                                              ­                                                                 ­   
What you put out, you take back in                                                               ­   
                                                             ­                                                         
and you'll be punished for your sins                                                             ­           
                                                                ­                                                    
So, while you're laughing at my pain,                                                            ­    
                                                            ­                                                          
I take comfort in what I've gained,                                                    
                                                                ­                                              
some insight into your black heart                                                      
                                                                ­                                                  
and a front row seat to you falling apart                                                      
     ­                                                                 ­                                            
Yes, I thought you were a friend                                                           ­         
                                                       ­                                                            
 but in time, my heart will mend                                                             ­               
                                                                ­                                                    
I'll put to use to what I've learned,                                                         ­     
                                                                ­                                                  
that some people want to watch you burn                                                             ­                           
                                     ­                                                                 ­          
That smirk you have on your face,                                                    
                                                                ­                                                  
will be the first thing that gets erased,                                                          ­                                                                 ­   
whenever the Devil collects his due,                                              
              ­                                                                 ­                                   
you will have hell to answer to

Somewhere deep inside of me,                                                            
                                                                ­                                              
there's an insect squirming                                                        ­              
                                                  ­                                                            
waiting for an opportunity                                                      ­                            
                                    ­                                                                 ­                   
or a perfect morning                                                          ­                              
                                  ­                                                                 ­                     
It laid dormant for so long,                                                            ­              
                                                                ­                                                       
I thought it was dead                                                             ­                         
                                       ­                                                                 ­              
but I was dead wrong,                                                           ­                         
                                                                ­                                                          
it chose to be hidden instead                                                          ­                
                                                ­                                                                 ­     
I would get a glimpse of it                                                               ­                                                                 ­                              
                                                                ­                                      
Somedays, I would cover it up                                                               ­   
                                                                ­                                                      
I tried to forget about it                                                               ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                            
                                                                ­                                                  
but it was never enough                                                           ­                   
                                                                ­                                                  
One day it just emerged,                                                         ­       
                                                         ­                                                      
quite by mistake                                                          ­                                                                                                                      ­                                               
right on the verge of its big break                                                    
                                                                ­                                                     
 It struggled inside of me,                                                              ­            
                                                                ­                                                      
I could feel it writhe                                                           ­                           
                                     ­                                                                 ­                
It wanted to be free,                                                            ­                          
                                                                ­                                                      
I could sense it try                                                              ­                                
                                ­                                                                 ­             
What could this insect be?                                                              ­                
                                                                ­                                                      
It was a butterfly

Standing on the front porch on a hot summer's day,                                                             ­                     
                                           ­                                                                 ­
pregnant & barefoot, you chose to walk away                                                  
                                                                ­                                            
Standing in a pool of freshly cried tears,                                                           ­ 
                                                                ­                                              
enabled me to regret loving you for years                                                            ­
                                                                ­                                                        
As your tires kicked up asphalt & dirt,                                                        
   ­                                                                 ­                                                    
                                                                ­                                                  
I was busy calling you a liar & a ****                                                             ­             
                                                   ­                                                                 ­    
I swore after that day I would be strong                                                           ­ 
                                                                ­                                                      
and my grieving time wouldn't be long                                                        
    ­                                                                 ­                                                 
I had our baby two months after you'd gone                                              
              ­                                                                 ­                                 
with him by my side, I was never alone                                                        
   ­                                                                 ­                                              
He was beautiful & you'd never know                                                      
      ­                                                                 ­                                   
because you weren't there to see him grow                                            
                ­                                                                 ­                                     
I never told him his daddy's name                                                             ­     
                                                                ­                                                      
I didn't want rejection to bring him shame                                                  
                                                                ­                                                  
So, I just loved him for the both of us,                                                            
 ­                                                                 ­                                                    
and always let him know that he could trust                                                          
                                                                ­                                                      
I know that you were trying to punish me                                                
                                                                ­                                                  
but I was the one doing the punishing                                                  
                                                                ­                                                          
I got years of his unconditional love,                                                            ­  
                                                              ­                                                    
not once were you mentioned or even thought of                                        
                      ­                                                                 ­                             
Now that you've grown into an old man                                                              ­              
                                                  ­                                                               
 and his life turned out better than you planned                                                      
   ­                                                                 ­                                                  
I don't feel bad that you are all
alone                                                          
                                                                ­                                                     
it's just a shame that your son is now grown

I see you smiling through your tears                                                            ­    
                                                                ­                                                      
   You still amaze me after all these years                                                            ­          
                                                      ­                                                              
                                                                ­                                                
Your strength helps me to believe                                                        
                                                                ­                                                   
   That all will be okay with me                                                               ­                     
                                           ­                                                                 ­            
   In your eyes I see a glimpse of hope                                                             ­   
                                                             ­                                                         
You are the only knot in a flimsy rope                                                             ­   
                                                             ­                                                         
  An anchor buried in me so deep                                                             ­                 
                                                                ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                         
holding me steady, firm on my feet                                                                        ­                                                      
I often wonder where I would I be                                                               ­ 
                                                               ­                                           
without you always supporting me                                                              
                                                                ­                                                      
I admire every aspect of you                                                              ­            
                                                    ­                                                              
You have always told me the truth                                                            ­
                                                                ­                                                    
No secrets & nothing to hide                                                             ­       
                                                                ­                                                        
  So easy for me to confide                                                          ­                      
                                          ­                                                              
Na­turally beautiful in every way                                                            
                                                                ­                                                      
I love you more than I can say                                                              ­  
                                                                ­                                                  
You accept me just as I am                                                                  ­                                               
 Push me to be all that I
  can                                                           ­               
                                                                ­                                                  
You listen to me & you understand                                                       ­         
                                                       ­                                                             
I'll walk through life with you, hand in hand

You are drowning me with your negativity                                                       ­                                               
Coming off you like waves soaking me                                                               ­                    
                                                                ­                                                          
I look for the sunshine, I long to see,                                                             ­   
                                                                ­                                                        
feel it's rays on my face & be happy                                                            ­            
                                                    ­                                                                 ­ 
You are the darkness, I need the light                                                            ­    
                                                                ­                                                      
You feed off me like a vampire at night                                                            ­        
                                                        ­                                                       
 Slowly draining me of my energy                                                           ­                 
                                               ­                                                               
Leaving me feeling weak & empty                                                            ­      
                                                          ­                                                            
You were a dark soul when we met                                                              ­                                
                                ­                                                                 ­               
That I couldn't help you, I regret                                                           ­             
                                                                ­                                            
You've one foot in the grave & one on my chest                                                
           ­                                                                 ­                                
You've taken my all & stolen the rest                                                      
                                                                ­                                                      
A dried-up flower I have become                                                           ­                                               
                                                                ­                                                  
 my beauty & scent are long gone

On the day that my Daddy died                                                             ­                 
                                                                ­                                                        
I went home for my last goodbye                                                          ­        
                                                        ­                                                          
                                                                ­                                                
Took my last walk around that place                                                          
                                                                ­                                                    
Held his jacket up to my face                                                             ­                 
                                               ­                                                             
breathed in my last scent of him                                                              ­                
                                                ­                                                              
thought about how I'd miss him                                                              ­    
                                                            ­                                                        
paid my last respects at his grave                                                            ­                            
                                                                ­                                              
thanked him for all the love he gave                                                      
                                                                ­                                                
Then I cursed my stubborn pride                                                        
   ­                                                                 ­                                      
  because I wasn't there by his side                                                             ­     
                                                           ­                                                           
we had drifted apart with time                                                             ­   
                                                             ­                                                           
but he was always on my mind                                                             ­                   
                                             ­                                                                 ­        
I was stubborn, I was proud,                                                           ­                   
                                             ­                                                                 ­
didn't say I was sorry out loud                                                             ­           
                                                                ­                                                
That was the pain I'd always have,                                                        
                                                                ­                                                    
after all, I still loved my dad                                                              ­        
                                                                ­                                                      
  I felt guilty for many years to come                                                             ­     
                                                           ­                                                   
  didn't want to face it, I'd rather run                                                          
                                                                ­                                                  
But in the end, it catches up to you                                                              ­                
                                                ­                                                                 ­ 
and when it does, it still rings true                                                             ­       
                                                                ­                                                      
I had to choose to forgive myself                                                           ­       
                                                         ­                                                           
or live a life writhing in hell                                                             ­       
                                                         ­                                                        
 I've come to grips with that pain                                                             ­                 
                                                                ­                                                         whenever I see my dad again,                                                           ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                        
 I'll tell him that I was so wrong                                                            ­    
                                                                ­                                                      
I didn't know I didn't have long                                                             ­                                                                 ­                              
                                  ­                                                                 ­               
I have learned lessons along the way.                                                        
    ­                                                                 ­                                                 
  I tell my loved ones I care every day                                                          
   ­                                                                 ­                                                  
  I know I'm still my daddy's girl,                                                      
                                                                ­                                                  
that he's watching me from his world                                                            ­    
                                                            ­                                                          
I sense his presence time to time                                                             ­             
                                                                ­                                                  
  He tells me he is doing just fine                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                                      
I know that he has forgiven me                                                              
­                                                                 ­                                                 
  and that knowledge sets me free

Anything I did to you is less than you deserved                                              
                                                                ­                                                 
When I said I hated you, I meant every word                                                
            ­                                                                 ­                                   
your lying & cheating didn't break me down                                                        
You can do what you want, I won't be around                                                           ­                                          
                                                                ­                                                
 You can let your girlfriend take care of you                                                              ­      
                                                          ­                                                             
I am sure you will tell her what to do                                                          
    ­                                                                 ­                                                 
You two can run off in the sunset today                                                            ­            
                                                    ­                                                              
Don't let the door hit your *** on the way                                                        
     ­                                                                 ­                                            
You are Mr.Irresponsible,is she aware?                                                           ­               
                                                 ­                                                               
  That when she needs you, you won't be there?                                            
                                                                ­                                                
That when she starts acting just like me,                                                      
                                                                ­                                                  
that I wasn't the ***** you made out me to be                                                               ­                   
                                             ­                                                         
Goodluck, good riddance, you're not killing me,                                      
                                                                ­                                                      
I should thank her for setting me free                                                      
      ­                                                                 ­                                               
I hope you are happy now I am gone                                                             ­   
                                                             ­                                                     
she will go too & you'll be alone

I feel like I am shattered glass                                                            ­                            
                                    ­                                                                 ­   
Splintered, broken, still intact                                                           ­           
                                                                ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                                               
Held together with resilience                                                       ­           
                                                     ­                                                                 ­     Straight forward no nonsense                                                         ­           
                                                                ­                                                      
You tell me I am too serious                                                          ­            
                                                    ­                                                                 ­ 
you don't understand any of this                                                             ­                                 
                               ­                                                                 ­                      
If you walked a mile in my shoes                                                            ­                  
                                                                ­                                                
then you would be somebody who                                              
               ­                                                                 ­                            
trusted in people & was hurt in return                                                        
  ­                                                                 ­                                               
was fed to the fire, charred & burned                                                           ­ 
                                                               ­                                                    
 who put their faith into backstabbing *******                                                    
                                                                ­                                                
held together with a thousand stitches                                                         ­   
                                                             ­                                             
walking wounded casualties of war                                                              ­        
                                                        ­                                                        
what are you judging me for?                                                             ­     
                                                           ­                                                           
I am a survivor despite my pain                                                             ­       
                                                                ­                                                        
  who's learned to never trust again                                                            ­                            
                                    ­                                                                 ­         
  Don't look at me as injured & flawed                                        
                                                                ­                                            
  despite the odds, I have stood tall

You wonder why I am with you                                                              ­                                         
                                                                ­                                                        
I hear you ask the reason why                                                              ­   
                                                                ­                                              
Because no one loves me like you do                                                            
                                                                ­                                                      
You make me laugh until I cry                                                              ­          
                                                      ­                                                          
There'­s no one I even think of                                                               ­           
                                                     ­                                                            
                                                                ­                                            
 When I'm with you it feels so right                                                            ­    
                                                            ­                                                            
  I love the way you love me                                                               ­             
                                                   ­                                                                 ­    
  I don't want you out of my sight                                                            ­            
                                                                ­                                              
When you wrap your arms around me                                                      
                                                                ­                                                  
pull me close & hold me tight                                                            ­      
                                                                ­                                                 
 You make me so **** happy                                                            ­            
                                                                ­                                                      
It gets me through the night                                                            ­            
                                                                ­                                              
  When we are not together                                                         ­                 
                                               ­                                                                 ­      
I close my eyes & see your face                                                             ­           
                                                                ­                                                      
I want to be with you forever                                                          ­                                        
                        ­                                                                 ­                         
No one could ever take your place

Even though the love is gone                                                             ­           
                                                     ­                                                                 ­  
                                                                ­                                                      
I am still holding on                                                               ­                                                    
                                                                ­                                                    
  I am too scared to let go                                                               ­                                                   
I don't want to be alone                                                            ­                        
                                                                ­                                                        
I am protecting my heart                                                            ­                            
                                    ­                                                                 ­                     
It bears so many scars                                                            ­                        
                                                                ­                                                        
I need some time to heal                                                             ­                       
                                         ­                                                                 ­            
I'm still afraid to feel                                                             ­                       
                                                                ­                                                      
I can't go back to us                                                               ­                         
                                       ­                                                                 ­    
You're someone I can't trust                                                            ­                          
                                                                ­                                                      
I can't forge on ahead                                                            ­                            
                                    ­                                                                 ­           
with a heart that is dead                                                             ­                 
                                               ­                                                                 ­      
I can't keep up this pace                                                             ­                                                   
             ­                                                                 ­                                        
I just need a safe place                                                            ­                            
                                                                ­                                                      
I need to catch my breath                                                           ­                         
                                                                ­                                                      
I need to give my heart a rest

If this is the last time I see you,                                                             ­             
                                                                ­                                                
please know that you were loved                                                            ­    
                                                                ­                                                      
and is you're missing me too                                                              ­                
                                                                ­                                                    
then you can look up above                                                            ­                                                
I will always be watching,                                                        ­              
                                                  ­                                                            
making sure you're okay,                                                            ­                    
                                            ­                                                                 ­ 
                                                                ­                                              
 even though we aren't touching,                                                        ­          
                                                                ­                                                        
I'll be with you each day                                                              ­                    
                                                                ­                                                
  You were my favorite treasure                                                         ­           
                                                                ­                                                 
 that I was blessed to have                                                             ­               
                                                 ­                                                                 ­
and it was my pleasure                                                         ­                   
                                             ­                                                                 ­      
to guide you down life's path                                                             ­     
                                                                ­                                                        
  If you ever loved me                                                               ­                 
                                                                ­                                                
keep me in your heart                                                            ­                      
                                                                ­                                                
with your love & memories                                                         ­                   
                                             ­                                                                 ­        
I will never part

She holds her hand over the flame,                                                           ­     
                                                           ­                                                         
                                                                ­                                            
 trying to tolerate the pain                                                             ­                         
                                       ­                                                                 ­        
behind her someone calls her name,                                                            ­        
                                                                ­                                                        
in their attempt to make her refrain                                                          ­          
                                                                ­                                                      
She blinks back her hot tears,                                                           ­         
                                                                ­                                                     
 that she's held back for a thousand years                                                          
                                                                ­                                                      
but it isn't the pain she fears                                                            ­                
                                                                ­                                                     
 and not from the voice she hears                                                            ­        
                                                                ­                                                    
In her mind she is not there,                                                           ­                   
                                             ­                                                                 ­  
she's taken herself to somewhere,                                                       ­               
                                                 ­                                                                 ­
  that she can escape & not care                                                             ­             
                                                   ­                                                             
from the reality she cannot bear                                                             ­           
                                                     ­                                                     
  running fast, she's broken free                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                                    
  of all those painful memories                                                         ­             
                                                                ­                                                  
like a horse out of the gate                                                             ­                     
                                           ­                                                                 ­      
she runs from her growing fate                                                             ­           
                                                     ­                                                               
as a child, she was abused                                                           ­                   
                                             ­                                                                 ­      
as a teen, she was confused                                                         ­                   
                                                                ­                                                      
a little girl who was used                                                             ­                     
                                           ­                                                                 ­
helped all that anger to fuse                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                                  
into the girl whose name                                                             ­             
                                                                ­                                                      
  is being called again & again                                                            ­                                    
                            ­                                                                 ­                       
so many people are to blame                                                            ­    
                                                                ­                                                    
for hurting the girl who seeks the flame

I am broken into pieces                                                           ­                       
                                                                ­                                                     
  No glue will ever mend                                                             ­                     
                                                                ­                                                      
Out of anyone's reaches                                                          ­                                
                                                                ­                                                        
  I will no longer pretend                                                          ­                              
                                  ­                                                                 ­                     
I am holding onto ledges,                                                          ­                          
                                                                ­                                                          while defying gravity                                                          ­                          
                                                                ­                                                    
with oil on the edges,                                                           ­                                 
                                                                ­                                                        
I cannot rescue me                                                               ­                       
                                         ­                                                                 ­            
I am walking a fine line,                                                            ­                                                              
wi­th a heavy heart                                                            ­                      
                                          ­                                                                 ­       
But I'll say that I'm fine.                                                            ­                      
                                                                ­                                                    
so, I don't fall apart                                                            ­                          
                                                                ­                                              
  Inside a war is raging,                                                          ­                        
                                                                ­                                                    
  it's me against myself                                                           ­                         
                                       ­                                                                 ­          
But I'll keep on staging,                                                         ­                   
                                                                ­                                                    
So no one can tell,                                                            ­                                  
                                                                ­                                                
that I am really close to                                                               ­   
                                                             ­                                                    
 going straight to hell                                                             ­                       
                                                                ­                                                  
No one knows what I go through,                                                         ­             
                                                                ­                                                      
  I guess it's just as well

This is my heart broken in two,                                                             ­                                                                      ­                                                      
it can't heal; it still loves you                                                              ­            
                                                    ­                                                              
Th­ese are my eyes tearing & blue                                                             ­     
                                                           ­                                                       
They can't dry; I still miss you                                                              ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­           
                                                                ­                                                  
These are my hands, shaking so bad                                                              ­                                                  
              ­                                                                 ­                                 
They just let go of the best I've had                                                            
                                                                ­                                                 
 These are my lips cracked & dry                                                          
                                                                ­                                              
Missing your kiss, asking why?                                                             ­                 
                                               ­                                                               
 ­ These are my feet unable to move                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                                      
I can't live here without you                                                              ­                                                                 ­                                     
                                                                ­                                                
This is my life without you in it                                                                     ­                                        
 Missing a piece that only you fit

During the time we were apart,                                                           ­               
                                                 ­                                                                 ­  
wounds formed scars on my heart                                                            ­        
                                                                ­                                                    
Now whenever I close my eyes,                                                            ­            
                                                    ­                                                                 ­     
I see you & her, I can't deny,                                                            ­          
                                                      ­                                                            
when we kiss it isn't the same,                                                            ­                                              
                                                                ­                                                          
I feel your mouth say her name                                                             ­         
                                                                ­                                                  
then I flashback to where we were,                                                            ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                           
when I caught you alone with her,                                                             ­       
                                                                ­                                                        
I know you want us to move on,                                                          
   ­                                                                 ­                                              
but I'm not sure I am that strong                                                           ­             
                                                                ­                                                    
It's not easy to forgive & forget,                                                                    ­                         
because I am not over it yet
                                                                    ­                                                  
Just because it fell through for you,                                                             ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­               
doesn't mean I should go back to you                                                        
                                                                ­                                                  
You should have thought about it first                                                      
                                                                ­                                             
 before you decided it was me, you'd hurt                                                      
      ­                                                                 ­                                                 
I 've been with you through thick & thin                                                             ­     
                                                           ­                                                         
and you **** on me again & again                                                            ­                          
                                      ­                                                                 ­       
Don't blame me for what you've done,                                                            ­        
                                                        ­                                                              
I won't miss you when you are gone                                                             ­ 
                                                                ­                                              
While you were busy replacing me,                                                        
     ­                                                                 ­                                                
I was seeing what I couldn't see                                                              ­                    
                                            ­                                                                 ­   
Now that I have really opened my eyes,                                                            ­  
                                                              ­                                                        
I love you less than I realized                                                         ­                 
                                                                ­                                                    
So, thanks for the favor for me                                                               ­                                                                 ­                                          
                      ­                                                                 ­                     
Maybe she is still there waiting

What words do you say to your only son,                                                             ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                         
When he's going to jail on a ****** one?                                                             ­                                                                 ­                                        
Do you tell him to be brave & strong?                                                          ­    
                                                            ­                                                          
Do you confront him on being wrong?                                                           ­ 
                                                               ­                                                       
Do you hug him knowing his life is through?                                              
                                                                ­                                                      
Remind him of what he's done to you?                                                      
      ­                                                                 ­                                               
  Do you smile & put on a brave face,                                                   
                                                                ­                                                  
  knowing he'll spend life in a hellish
place?                                                        
                                                                ­                                                      
Do you promise to visit him frequently,                                                      ­      
                                                                ­                                                    
Knowing he'll serve his life lonely?                                                          ­                                                                 ­                                                                       ­                       
What do you say to your only son,                                                             ­   
                                                                 ­                                             
When you know he's guilty on a ****** one?                                          
                  ­                                                                 ­                               
Do you support him as best as you can?                                                          
                                                                ­                                                  
Do you tell him to be the better man?                                                          
  ­                                                                 ­                                               
Do you tell him to tell the whole truth?                                                           ­ 
                                                                ­                                              
Knowing exactly what it's going to do?                                              
                                                                ­                                                  
Do you blame him or blame yourself?                                                        ­                                                                 ­               
You didn't load the shotgun shells                                                           ­             
                                                                ­                                                  
Do you throw your hands in the air?                                                            
­                                                                 ­                                                 
Cry out to God in your despair?                                                         ­                 
                                               ­                                                                 ­  
Do you fall to your knees & pray?                                                          
                                                                ­                                                    
Do you let him find his own way?                                                             ­     
                                                                ­                                                        
Do you cry & break down
inside?                                                          ­            
                                                    ­                                                             
 Tell him there's no reason to
lie?                                                             ­         
                                                       ­                                                       
What do you tell your only son,                                                             ­               
                                                 ­                                                             
Whe­n he's going to die for a ****** one.

Sixteen years ago, on this same date                                                                      ­                                                    
 I was in such a different headspace                                                        ­              
                                                  ­                                                          
Hopele­ss & thought that nobody cared                                                            ­    
                                                                ­                                                        
I convinced myself to not be scared                                                           ­     
                                                           ­                                                               
I gathered up all the medications                                                      ­                
                                                                ­                                                  
More than enough for relaxation                                                       ­                     
                                                                ­                                                    
Laid down on the couch like I had                                                              ­  
                                                                ­                                                           always done before when I felt bad                                                      
       ­                                                                 ­                                              
I had spent so much time lately                                                  
        ­                                                                 ­                               
Planning & plotting ******* me                                                               ­ 
                                                               ­                                                 
  That night I couldn't take it anymore,                                                         ­ 
                                                               ­                                                       
  I had pain inside of my inner core                                                            
                                                                ­                                                      
I put my faith in the whole amount,                                                          ­        
                                                        ­                                                              
A handful of courage, I drank them down                                                    
        ­                                                                 ­                                           
All of this dialogue in my head                                                             ­ 
                                                                ­                                                     
   would soon be silenced, would be dead                                                          
  ­                                                                 ­                                               
But God had other plans for me                                                               ­                                                                 ­                        
                                        ­                                                                 ­       
  sent an angel and his mercy                                                            ­              
                                                                ­                                                
Now I am feeling so differently,                                                     ­               
                                                                ­                                                      
I thank God for loving me

There is an ocean deep inside of me                                                              
­                                                                 ­                                                     
and lately I've gone deep sea diving                                                           ­         
                                                       ­                                                           
I'm doing a little bit of self-reflection                                                  ­                      
                                          ­                                                                 ­   
Making sure I'm headed in the right direction                                                    
   ­                                                                 ­                                        
Trusting my intuition, no second guess                                                            ­  
                                                              ­                                                          
It's working pretty well, no problems yet                                                    
         ­                                                                 ­                                    
Walking in the path that's right for me                                                            
                                                                ­                                            
Standing tall in the face of adversity                                                        ­        
                                                        ­                                                    
Saying what I believe is the real truth                                                           
Even if it's not hitting your sweet  
tooth                                                    ­                
                                                                ­                                                
Hold my head up & walk through the crowd                                                  
                                                                ­                                                
This is me being me, me being proud

So, while I'm here broken & ******                                                           ­                     
                                                                ­                                              
Mascara smeared; she still looks pretty                                                           ­ 
                                                               ­                                                     
Even with that smile in her eyes                                                            
­                                                                 ­                                                
  That ***** is the devil in disguise                                                         ­         
                                                       ­                                                               
She took my love & my pride                                                            ­                      
                                          ­                                                                 ­         
Now every day, I die inside                                                           ­               
                                                 ­                                                                 ­
Puffy faced & pouting mouth                                                            ­              
                                                                ­                                                      
She shows you what love's about                                                            ­
                                                                ­                                                  
She was a habit you couldn't quit                                                            
­                                                                 ­                                                   
  It was me you chose to forget

Unblinking eyes, plastic smiles                                                                       ­    
Not seeing me, this thing defiled                                                                      ­ 
No friends, many enemies                                                          ­                                                                 ­                                             
No one cares about me                                                                          ­                                        
                                                                ­                                        
 Shunned kids at school                                                           ­     
                                                                 ­                                                     
Not good enough, too uncool                                                                      ­                                           
 Taking me to my limit
                                                           ­                                                            
I just kept on taking it                                                                  ­                                        
Pushing it down deep inside                                                           ­             
                                                   ­                                                           
Shows itself as I hide                                                             ­                               
                                                                ­                                                      
A target, bullied every day                                                              ­            
                                                                ­                                                      
I die a little more each day                                                              ­            
                                                                ­                                      
Collapsing inside, heart first                                                            ­          
                                                      ­                                                        
Don't they how much it hurts?                                                           ­   
                                                                ­                                                      
In private, hot tears slide                                                            ­                  
                                                                ­                                              
Won't let them take my pride                                                            ­      
                                                                ­                                                      
I pretend that I don't care                                                             ­                                               
                 ­                                                                 ­                                      
Don't return their cold stares                                                           ­             
                                                                ­                                                
Rush back home to get away                                                             ­       
                                                                ­                                              
Don't want to be bullied today

Between you & me the sands of time ran out                                                              ­
                                                                ­                                                        
So many memories that I forgot about                                                            ­      
                                                                ­                                                
Riding out on a canoe, swimming at the Gap                                              
                                                                ­                                                      
The first time you kissed me, I was taken aback                                              
First date in January snow, it was so **** cold                                
                            ­                                                                 ­                       
Your love was the first I'd known & it felt like gold                                              
              ­                                                                 ­                                   
  Going out to your parent's place, I was so **** scared,                                                          ­      
                                                                ­                                                      
  and from the look on your face, you were scared as well                                                      
      ­                                                                 ­                                           
  but it all worked out & we had a good time                              
 Without any doubts we got along just fine                                                             ­     
                                                                ­                                                  
We dated for a long time & before we knew                                                  
                                                                ­                                                  
You were all mine & our love grew                                                             ­ 
                                                                ­                                              
  Sadly, I was much younger than you                                                                      ­                                                
  You grew more serious than I really knew                                            
                ­                                                                 ­                                 
  You were ready to marry & wanted to have kids                                
                            ­                                                                 ­                 
  More quickly than I ever did                                                              ­                                            
 You began to scare me with all your
needs                                                        
   ­                                                                 ­                                            
  And I wanted more than I received                                                         ­ 
                                                                ­                                                  
You were my first love, but the timing was bad                                                                            ­                                                     
I was too young & you were all I'd had                                                          
   ­                                                                 ­                                                  
I wanted to live, I wanted to love                                                             ­       
                                                         ­                                                             
I wanted to see what else there was
                                                                 ­                                                   
I'm so sorry I hurt you, it wasn't my intent                                                    
                                                                ­                                                        
I was too young to know what love really meant                                    
                       ­                                                                 ­                              
I know you loved me & wanted it to work                                
                                                                ­                                            
Believe me, I never wanted you to hurt                                                        
    ­                                                                 ­                                                 
It wasn't until the same thing happened to me                              
                                                                ­                                                
 That I knew I had to tell you, I am so sorry

Get your knee off of my neck                                                             ­                                                                 ­                
Take your foot off of my chest                                                            ­                
 You used to say I was the best                                                             ­               
You fill my heart up with regret                                                          
­                                                                 ­                                                 
You build me up to bring me down                                                             ­                                                
I do better when you're not around                                                           ­       
                                                         ­                                                             
You want me 6 feet underground                                                      ­                          
                                      ­                                                                 ­           
Prefer me not to make a sound                                                            ­                          
                                                                ­                                                    
At one time, those big dark eyes,                                                            ­                                                          
      ­                                                                 ­                                       
made me feel safe inside                                                           ­                   
                                                                ­                                                  
but there was hatred brewing there                                                
           ­                                                                 ­                              
  exposed by your cold, blank stares                                                           ­           
                                                     ­                                                             
  Y­ou are not who you used to be                                        
                                                                ­                                  
  Sometimes, I think you'll **** me                                                               ­                 
                                               ­                                                                 ­      
I think you have a monster inside                                                           ­   
                                                                ­                                                
That you wish you could still hide                                                             ­                                         
                       ­                                                                 ­                              
I no longer feel love for you                                                              ­                                                                 ­         
                                                                ­                                                      
  I only stay because of what you'll do                                                               ­                                                                 ­                          
                                      ­                                                                 ­           
  I'm too scared to run away                                                             ­           
                                                     ­                                                                 ­
I know that will fan the flames                                                           ­ 
                                                               ­                                                   
The thrill of the hunt in you                                                              ­                                                                 ­                 
                                                                ­                                                
will give you any **** excuse                                                           ­           
                                                                ­                                                    
  To give me what you think I need                                                             ­                                                                 ­
  A lesson you're sure that I'll heed

They were breaking her, she was their favorite game,                                                            ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                                
Her face was a blur, they all called her names,                                                           ­                   
                                                                ­                                                      
She could have been anyone; they just had a need                                                                   ­                                                     
                                                                ­                                                    
to hurt someone with their reckless deeds                                                            ­                                                           
     ­                                                                 ­                                          
Fragile as glass, they chipped away at her,                                                                      ­                                                   
all in the same class, they liked throwing dirt                                          
                                                                ­                                                  
Some said she had demons of her own                                                                     ­                                               
they exorcised theirs by computer & phone                                                
                                                                ­                                                
They saw her as weak & hoped to bring her down                                                             ­                                                                 ­                                                                 ­                           
They sought out to seek someone to push around     
                                                                 ­                                                   
It all became too much; she committed suicide                                    
                     ­                                                                 ­                                
It was just too much for her to abide                                                    
                                                                ­                                                
They had broken her, she was their favorite game,                                                    
       ­                                                                 ­                                            
   To them a faceless blur whose life forever changed

What are you so afraid of?                                                              ­              
                                                  ­                                                                
­Being gay isn't contagious                                                       ­                     
                                           ­                                                                 ­        
Why can't you be true to you?                                                             ­                                                                 ­                                                
                ­                                                                 ­                                   
Love anyone that you want to.                                                              ­          
                                                      ­                                                                 ­ 
Is it wrong to be different?                                                       ­             
                                                                ­                                                    
Who are we to consequence?                                                     ­                             
                                   ­                                                                 ­              
We're all unique in our own way                                                              ­    
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What is wrong & who's to say?                                                             ­     
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Judgement is passed so easily                                                           ­           
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Like a cycle of stupidity,                                                       ­                                                              
Do you believe you can choose                                                           ­             
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Be careful of who you lose                                                             ­                 
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Friends come is all colors & size                                                          
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Do you have so many by your side?                                                            ­
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That you can choose to discard                                                          ­                
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everyone who's not your star?                                                            ­            
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  Words can hurt so **** much                                                             ­                                                                 ­    
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  Stop the hatred, enough is enough!                                                          ­                                                      
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  This hate could only make sense                                                            ­             
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If we embraced intolerance

Behind brown eyes & a beautiful face                                                             ­                                                                 ­                                                                                       ­              
Lay sad memories she wished to erase                                                            ­
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She longed to not be part of the human race                                                  
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 Now God has set her free                                                             ­           
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Not always what we hoped she would be                                                               ­                 
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We needed more than our reality                                                          ­            
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We saw things she couldn't see                                                              ­              
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Now God has set her free                                                             ­                       
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I never thought we would be friends                                                          ­
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But that's what happened in the end                                                              ­              
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Sharing memories & making amends                                                          
­                                                                 ­                                               
Now God has set her free                                                             ­                     
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I know she's in a better place                                                            ­            
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All her pain has been erased                                                           ­         
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   I 'm sure there's a big smile on her face                                                          
  ­                                                                 ­                                             
  Now God has set her free

Don't you know once we're down this road, there's no going back                  
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All these years of loving you, where did we fall off track?                                
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Looking back at all the years, I doubt we would know when                                                             ­                                                
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We would rather hate each other than to call the other friend                          
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No use getting sentimental, it is what it is                                                  
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I don't know where we go after all of this                                                             ­                                                                 ­                                      
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You can go your way, and I will go mine, there's no turning back                      
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The cards are laid & they've been played but the cards were stacked                
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It was felt but not said aloud for a long, long time                                                             ­         
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We could have lived in ignorance & it would be just fine                                      
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But I decided that truth would set us both free                            
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What we couldn't see was how it affected us emotionally