There are no ordinary people-
everyone has a story to tell,
a dream to chase and a
mind unto itself.
What is your
story?

Dear diary;
Today I came to
the realization that
I can probably count on one hand
the people who know anything
about me in real life.
If you are reading this,
I doubt you're
one of them.

To live a good life,
to stay fulfilled and alive
is to keep you in this heart
at all times.

Things don't really end-
they just transform or morph for
better or for worse

11:16 AM
17/7/22

Sometimes
you just have to
let the anger, the darkness,
the sadness and chaos go.
Sometimes
all you can do is
yield these feelings
to the past and try
to not look back.

Once a crab has made
a home in one shell of a heart,
it is difficult for it to find
a home in another.

I won't say your name-
you are not for me and I
am not for you, dear

11:49 AM
20/1/21

I want to let go
of these feelings
I have held onto for far too long.
I want to let go
of these memories
like a child lets go of a balloon.

I miss someone whom
I've never met before - is
there a word for that?

11:38 PM
17/3/21

Doing what others
do for acceptance is a
form of suicide

4:10 PM
27/6/22

Like the rain
drowns the plants,
your words drown
this sinking heart.

Dear diary;
at the end of the day,
I have no one to blame but myself
for this wall I have built
to keep everyone else
out.

The truth will set you free
no matter how frightening it may be
to shed the ignorance we have
found comfort in.
Some people may run and hide from it,
others even fight it,
but the more you seek truth,
the easier it will be to
make that peace.

Dear Diary;
now that the dust has settled
I have realized that
all I want to do is
work,
travel,
work,
travel
to distract myself
from the joke that is my life

You are my chai-
there is nothing as sweet
or as warming as you.
I need you every morning
to get me through the day
and each night to grant me
the sweetest of dreams.

Joy not just by name,
but my joy around the world,
the joy in my heart.

11:19 AM
20/11/22

what a
tragedy it is
to think of you
and not tell you
because you are
no longer
mine.

Oh Chai,
you cleanse this soul.
Your warmth rushes through this body
on the way to this frozen heart.
So sweet you are,
I need you every night.
Oh Chai,
it's you that makes me feel alright.

Even in dreams
I cannot escape you.
Your voice still shrieks through sleep
and your face can still be seen
throughout these dreamscapes.
What was once a method of escape
has now become a prison of
memories of a love I thought I
left behind long ago.

I thought I
could save you
but it turns out that
I only made it
worse.

The burden of hope
is bound to take its toll on
everyone one day

11:56 PM
15/5/21

Why are there so
many broken hearts?
What sort of world are we
living in where so many of us
feel unloveable and so
utterly alone?
I keep having to remind myself
that I am not the only one,
that there are other
broken hearts
in this valley
we call
life.

I seem to know how
to chase the stars-
but never how to
catch them.

Memories are as
delicate as the petals
of a sunflower

11:54 PM
22/8/21

That time between
Christmas and New Year
has always felt like purgatory
and we are just ghosts with
nowhere to go but haunt the time
until the new year is here.

You may not
be able to forget them,
but you sure as hell
can remember them
as lessons.

Once someone breaks your heart,
it's hard to ever let your guard down.
A new person, a new heart-
one that does not beat so blissfully
as it did before the heartbreak.
We overanalyze their every word.
Are they lying or do they
really mean what they say?
Maybe they're hiding something
or maybe anxiety strikes again.
Maybe they will leave at any moment,
it wouldn't be the first time.
Indeed, we try to think outside the box
in hopes to avoid another heartbreak.
In doing so we lose a part of ourselves.

Don't let me close my eyes-
wake me if I do,
even if I am dreaming because
no dream can compare to the one I lay beside.
I want to dream of you
with eyes wide open.

Baby,
I'm a broken man.
I'm nothing but damaged goods
but I promise to give you
all of the love that I
couldn't promise
to myself.

Just as the
dawning sun
kisses the sleeping Earth,
your smile brings
warmth and light
to my
soul.

Everybody's book
has some pages they'd rather
tear out and forget

12:02 PM
10/7/21

I will wait for this to pass,
sometimes, that's all you can do.
I will pray it to go away,
this is what desperation does.
I will wish for it to never return,
I wish this every time.

When the time is right,
we will meet again, that is
my promise to you

4:12 PM
4/1/21

Sometimes it's okay to disassociate,
to tune out the world and be sad.
Go for a walk, put on some music,
do what you need to do
to ease the pain.
Remember,
there is no rush
for this is what it means
to be human.

There are things I will
never understand such as
why I still love you

11:51 PM
27/3/23

I am a bee in the
sunflowers of memories.
I find shelter and solitude
underneath the petals
and harvest that sweet nostalgia
of this garden we once shared.

If I get used to
your touch then
I fear I would not be able
to let you go.

The night is solitary,
not sadness.
It is the embrace of the moon
that makes for good company rather
than the unforgiving sun.
These neon lights will not fade,
nor the city ambience-
the soundtrack to my nights.
Once again,
I find myself with a bottle in hand
as the dying dusk comes and goes-
I sigh.

What hurts more:
Hearing the truth or
ignoring it?

Dear Diary;
I have concluded that
there is no soul left in me-
maybe I never had one.
All I know is that there are
no dreams and no love
to be desired.

Her flesh may be scar-less,
but don't be fooled,
her broken bones and
broken heart are
all part of the
journey.

We were
not made for this world.
We were made for
each other.

I never asked for
any of this. It was all
you. you wanted this.

10:07 AM
14/8/22

Why do we bottle it in,
and hold ourself together
in front of strangers who
do not care nor matter?

Dear diary;
Today,
I feel alive.
so much so that
my demons are
laughing with me.

People can get quite
defensive when they don't know
what they claim to know

4:01 PM
31/10/22

We live in
troubled times,
where leaders fail
and pandemics prevail.
Mass hysteria is
the only game in town-
society's going down
because we cannot hear,
and we cannot think
over the turmoil
spreading across
our soil.

The demons never really leave,
they only slumber in the
dark corners of the mind.
They do not leave,
do not let them fool you,
they will hide and wait for the
right moment to wreak havoc upon
the soul once again.

We have nobody to blame
for these feelings but ourselves.
How we react depends on how
we interpret the situation.
Just remember that you are
your own source of emotion-
the keys to this ride
we call life
is yours.

This world
is under no obligation
to be less weird
than fiction.