I want to lay in the corners your smile
And sleep between your laughter of eternity.

The past is like an unwelcome guest
That sleeps on your couch and eats all your food.
You can’t get rid of her because you’re the one
that keeps inviting her.

Decorate your sadness with flowers
And make your wellbeing a beautiful garden.
Don't be afraid to blossom in his comfort.

I searched for you in the alley of conversations.
In the backyard of a smile.
Between the walls of simplicity.

I searched for you in the corners of affection.
In the garden of butterflies.
In the unsafety of my dreams.

I searched for supernatural, divine encounters.
For beating hearts and shaky voices
For mindblowing realities.
I searched for God in a man.

Instead I found sincerity
I found differences
I found fear and jealousy
I found mistakes
I found acceptance

I found human.

For what it's worth i loved you.
Even when my eyes were too afraid to meet yours.
I just wanted to escape the breathlessness of being near you.
I was waiting for the rain to pass over our circumstances.
My heart was like a never ending earthquake.
The beautiful landscape of your mind was never the reason.
For what it's worth i really loved you.

i'm not a slave of compliments.
I won't overdose on injections of racism.
The only addiction i have it of the melanin in my skin.
My heritage is not a sin.
My womanhood has always been the evidence of excellence.
My faith is not a bad habit I need rehabilitation from.
If discrimination was a drug i would be high every day

If you ask me how my mind works,

I would have no words to define
No poems that can describe
You would have to step inside

My mind is a maze.
Guided by maps of conversations
Lost between walls of questionmarks

If you ask me how my mind works,

I would invite you in.
But there's no guarantee you'll find your way out.
Bon voyage.

I am black coffee with curves of sugar.
I am a spoon of chocolate
I am soul food
I am a wombed man
The rib of an african king
The golden crown of the cosmos.

I am full moon or a sunset
I am light,
I am a spark,
a flame,
a bonfire,
I am fire works.

I’ll leave traces of smoke in your nostrils.,
Just so you’ll recognize my presence when you’re seeking me.
I’ll shelter myself between your veins just to make your heart beat a little faster.
I am the revolution of love.
I am a silenced desire.

You are the oppurtunities you need.
You are the miracles you seek.
You are the stars you're trying to reach.
You are the proclamations you speak.

You are the treassure you're trying to find.
You are the mountains to climb.
You are whatever you decide.
Because God resides in you

Beauty is connected to the soul.
Beauty is a presence instead of an appearance.
It goes beyond dimples and perfect teeth.
Beauty means being comfortable with things society is trying to make us feel insecure about.
Beauty means waking up from the nightmares of insecurities and leaving the ugly pieces of the mirror shattered in your bed.
It is misunderstood and therefore underrated.

I was told i wasn't smart enough.
I was told that i wouldn't achieve anything.
But here i am, standing on a stage. Undressed by all my imperfections
With emotional nakedness in front of the mic.
Covered in fear, but driven by courage.

We've all been told something negative.
However our necessity to survive these discouragements should keep our dreams alive.
We should follow our happiness like footsteps in a minefield.
And let succes exist through the art that we create.

Karma is a woman cause she never forgets.

Even if the sun steals my shine
I will still sparkle.
Don't forget the moon catches sunbeams in his reflection
In order to light up the universe
When it's his time to shine

Sometimes the absence of the face helps us to look inside the soul.

She was different
because of the stars in her eyes.
She was different
because the universe was her playground.
She was different
because the sun was her crown.

The planets surrounded her
and served her in grace.
Full aware of her beauty and excellence,
still she did the unthinkable.
She robbed the moon from me
leaving an empty sky to play with

She was different
because she didn't care.

Capture my imperfections.
They display the most pure and honest parts of me.

Dear Spanish breeze,
You rolled up my inspirational sleeves.
You gave me a glorious sight and placed me in an inventive light.
I call you a thief in the night for robbing words out of my mouth.
You guide my fingertips and the lips of my pen
by kisses of daydreams and endless ideas.
I am a home where the sweetest poems abide in.
Ready to come out and imprint a thousand pages.
What a delight to travel through poetic time of this artistic city.

Dear Spanish sun,
You burned my lack of poetic desire.
You colored my inventiveness like you darkened my skin.
I admire the way you have inspired me to become the poetess i aspire to be.
Your ravishing art undressed the indecisive poetess in me.
So here I stand emotionally naked in front of written truth
ready to loose myself in your Catalan atmosphere.
"Rest your ears darling and let your eyes whisper poetic visuals," you say.
And i close my eyes. I travel through this dream till forever ends.

All the shed tears will not carry the weight of your absence
But they will remind me that's it okay to drown in memories of you.

That night,

I felt the kiss of the lips that weren't yours.
I welcomed them with mine but they didn't feel like home.
His hands gently introduced themselves to the side of my face
but every stroke felt like an emotional choke.
He admired me like art, unknowing that i was already sold.

Sensational smile. Enchanted eyes.
I'm in love with every being that you are.
My spirit screams "beautiful" every time my eyes
have the honor to admire you.
Your voice caresses me deep down in my soul.
Your presence tastes like heavens rain.
My pride bows in your absence and becomes humility.
Honestly, i've flirted with the imagination of us.
I've danced with the fantasy of our lips embraced.
Every night the scent of your hair tickles my senses
like i'm falling asleep in a bed full of roses.

You timetravel me back when earth was still a paradise.
Back when men didn't know sin.
Back when God Himself dwelled among His people.
Probably i wouldn't love you then cause the way i love
you now is already a sin to me. And then i remember: this is not paradise
and i'm already a sinner who was drugged at our first encounter.

That night,

After meeting the lips of an undesirable visitor
i realised that i can kiss as many as i want.
My soul would only be satisfied when i come home. To you.

There's a combination of words stuck at the back of my tongue.
As i diligent search a way to self express, i discover
that my vocal chords have already given up.
I´m numb in my actions and paralized in my speech.
A blend of fear and past dissappointments
are causing a knot in my stomach
and arousing a battlefield between
the words on my lips and the words of my thoughts.
Swallowing through feelings and sentences confining my emotional vocabulary,
i continue to move myself with the words left and
the right intentions in the back of my head.
Drenched in fake smiles and fake laughters.
Wounded but still whole. I move on.
Till they become scars on the invisible side of my soul.
I know that there ain't no way that
you´ll ever dance to the rythm of my heartbeat.
So i'll continue to move myself in life on instrumentals.
Alone. Silently. Broken. Unspoken.

I used to love h.e.r., but a bad friend is what i discovered
I should've known, i should've seen it like no any other.
But I didn't bother, i kept my head high.
My eyes were being covered so i couldn't see through the right signs.
I ignored them but accepted in the right time.
My intiution warned me for her light crime.
I should've watched my back-stabbed from the beginning.
I was trapped in her lies that she packed with a smile.

Thoughts wander like grains of sand in the desert.
The Bible is my oasis in the drought.
I exhale my own mind
breathe in psalms and scriptures.
Fill my lungs with air of all godliness.
I surrender to a beautiful mystery.
Unknown yet sure.
Inexperienced yet secure.
I'm a seeker that became a finder.
Lift my hands in exaltation of the Almighty.
Waiting for His grace to shower me like precious oil.
God,
Renew in me the visions of life.
Recreate in me a new mind.

What's going on?!

With these beautiful dark women bleaching their skin and hiding their features.
Reaching to a point of shame from these beautiful creatures.
They don't believe what the bible says, so they're their own preachers.
While God designed them to be beautiful queens,
living the unachieved dreams of their african ancestors.

Daughters of Africa, daughters of slaves.
Free in the physical, but mentally chained.
Darkened by the morning sun.
Brightened by the evening moon.
A smile that captivates homeless hearts.
A strenght that fascinates hopeless minds.

Dear beautiful black woman,
Know who you are.
Black is beautiful. Black means strong.
Skin tone that matches the earth.
Curves that catches the eye.
Walk like a goddess and talk like a queen.
When you enter a room
let your appearance speak, let your presence prophesy:
"I'm worthy, I'm proud and I'm beautiful"

He smiles so bright like he has teeth of gold.
Projecting the reflections of his own inceptions.
I'm done grieving the words that once killed the inner me.
Verbally abusive was the past that didn't last.
He shattered my hope like splintered and shattered glass.

As far as the moon is to the sun is he to me.
I can picture his face but to me he's faceless.
His voice is like the echo of a stranger.
He salts his words with flatter,
it doesn't matter, they are tasteless.

His speech is drenched in hypocritical lyricals.
Transmissions of emphatic subliminals
transformed him into an emotional criminal.
If people would obey the limitations of their naive believes.
Maybe they would know that he calls me once a year...

If something is bothering you today don't hold it in. Talk about it, pray about it and let it go. Don't let internal issues transform themselves into anger, bitterness and unforgiveness.

I let the ink speak for me cause frequently
i got a foolish tongue.
Weak words absorbed in long one man conversations.

It's funny how it seems to be.
Everything used to flow so easily.
But now i'm stuck.  Nothing is more fluid.
I tryna do it. The more i put into it, the more i fail.

Tryna give birth to a wise vocabulary,
but i paralize when i look into your eyes.
I kinda lost myself in you when our intelects connected.
I reacted bad, i'm verbal passive,
cause i lack communication skills, conversation killer.
Chilling on a J Dilla track.
I'm on a tactic missionary. Dyslectic dictionary
effected by my own ways and sinful vissionary.

I guess i can't feed you, but i need you.
I put my soul on paper, naked like a see-through shirt
I hope you know how much you're worth.
And that you're much better than what i deserve.

I loved you
Before our eyes met
I loved you
Before our minds spoke
I loved you
Before the storm
Before the dissapointments

Hidden like a treasure inside my chest.
Buried under the palms of my hands.
Well kept, well protected.
Like a secret.
Sustains the unsaid.
Interpreter of the acceptable.

These hands have caught the salty tears
of sweet miseries.
They've known the touch of beauty
in its highest form of perfection.

These hands can melt together in a beautiful interlock
and become one.
Part of a beautiful history they are.
They've folded themselves into prayers of despair.
An extension piece of the inexplicable tongue they are.
So don't tell me that hands can't speak.
They have a code. A voice. They are a language.

These hands will be ready to comfort, to hold and to love.

A poetic instrument they are.
Without them poetry would non-exist. Non-written.
Where would i be?
Lost, like souls without peace.

She says: WHY R U STILL LAYING THERE?
First she whispered, then she spoke and then she screamed
cause it seemed like i was consciously deaf.
'You say ur tired but are you really?
You say ur done but do you mean it?
You sure don't act like it.
You were happy, you were at peace cause i've seen it'

Well, now i'm not, i answered.
I'm emotionally broken cause he broke me,
My heart so full of feelings, they might choke me.
Feeling it wraps its cold hands around my neck,
As i gasp for air, waiting for my lungs to fill,
fuel my body with energy and try to fight back.
But i lack hope, so i finally gave up.
I fell so hard spiritually,
i landed on my back and decided to stay there.
Why? because:

There's only an amount of weight i can bear.
I feel like i passed the limit, twice
then three, four and five times.
So I've had it! My goal is so far, i can't even grab it.
Instead of feeding my spirit i overfed my habit.
Pulling myself away of His light, while my world turns black.
Crawling into the darkest corner
far away from Him cause i'm to ashamed to show my face
Ignoring her calls, denying His arms, disregarding His embrace.
Forgetting His grace and neglecting my thoughts.

And then she, the inner voice in me,
finalised our dialogue.
Why are u broken while He healed you?
Why are you a slave while He freed you?
Ain't there anything that you've memorised.
Rise up before you realize it's to late.
before your inner voice, actually the voice of God, is gone.
Cause then you'll get as cold as the floor that you're laying on.

Rebelious mind against all godly.
Tryna push this pressure of me.
Nobody to stop me.
Seduction robbed me.
Started as an innocent introduction.
Befriended it's way through my thoughts and made me
fall in love with the idea of sin.