When we met I didn't know you were hiding behind a disguise
There was something dark deep inside
When I met the real you there was no turning back
I was in love with your disguise

The moment I fell in love with you
I didn't land on my feet
I landed on my heart
I fell and I fell hard
Unable to catch myself
And when I landed
You werent there to catch me

Without you I'm falling apart
With you I'm breaking down
Before you I didn't know what I was missing
I wish I never knew what it felt to be yours
Because now I'm lost

There's a beginning a middle and a end
You weren't in my beginning
I don't know if you will be in my end
But oh the middle was so sweet
Where my heart bubbled with love
My soul was made new
And there I grew

Leave again
Just to come back
Be so sweet pull me back in
Leave me again
I'm crying I'm dying
Waiting on you again
Will you be back this time
How long will it last
I'm waiting on the day you don't show back up
That day will be bittersweet
I want you to stay
But coming and going is killing me
What kind of game are you playing
Because I don't know the rules

Love isn't coming my way
Only heartache and pain
People say love hurts
But does it even exist

I can't forget you
All I can do is miss you
I love you and I can't stop
My heart doesn't know how to

When Everything's quiet
My thoughts are the loudest
In this darkness
I ponder my mistakes
I feel like I'm running
From everything that's hiding
Deep inside

I want to be the lyrics to a song
My words flow and relate to peoples thoughts
The lyrics people listen to when they are sad
The lyrics they listen to when they are falling apart
The lyrics that describes their thoughts
I want to be a song for people like me
The sad. The angry. The broken. The confused.
I want to be a song
That makes sense
Right?

I don't know why I love you
I don't know why I care
I just want you to love me
But I feel like you don't care
Maybe you don't know how

What if I told you that girl over there.
Yeah the one you just complimented on how skinny she's gotten.
What if I told you that that girl is staving.
Staving in so many ways.
Yes she is hungry. In the literal way and metaphorical way.
She is starving but it goes deeper than that.
She wants to be seen. She wants love. She wants life.
She wants happiness. She wants to be pretty. She wants the things you do.
Hell she doesnt know what it is she wants anymore.
Maybe she is just like you in away.
She cant even pinpoint when she decided this for herself.
Maybe it was the first compliment. The first time a guy looked at her.
The first time someone told her she was pretty.
She wanted to be prettier skinnier better.
She doesnt even realize she is living in hell, or maybe she does and doesnt care.
She wants all these things that much. That she doesnt care.
And you are "feeding" into that with every compliment, every look and every word.
She has made herself weak. Weak in so may ways.
Mentally and physically. Now look again. You see it now. Dont you?
You see the circles the tiredness in her eyes.
Now look again you see the sad the hurt and the pain.
Now look again you see that she is me. Now look again she could easily be you.

I Stopped loving you today
I Replayed all the memories
Confronted all the pain
With rain falling down
I let you go
And Found the parts
I had lost while loving you

Why do you do it destroy yourself like you do
Your better than you think you are
You had a past but you do have a future
Don't let your past take it away
Mistakes of a teenage boy running into adult hood
Covered by a smoky drunken haze
Drugs fills your head making it foggy
You take hands fulls of pills to push your fate
The rush the burn the way it makes you feel up
I don't understand it

You left
That was your choice
A choice I had to deal with

I feel this way
You feel this way
Im scared to feel this way
Just to let it all go
And be with you with no worries
It scares me
It scares me that I need you
That you are the only thing that makes sense
That you're the one
I feel like I'm diving in ice water blind folded
Not knowing what will happen
Trying to find something wrong
Where everything is right
Driving us both crazy

Wake up
The party is over
Grow up
Put it
Away
Its not worth it

We were two completely different characters
From different story's
We were never meant to meet
But we wrote our ownstory
Now I know to never do that again
You belong in your world and I belong in mine

I have this same recurring dream
And you are always in it
Mostly its us cuddled together
Legs over legs
Fingers laced together
You holding me
Sometimes Im crying
Sometimes were laughing
But all the time Im happy with you
I talk about my life
My childhood memories
I want you to know every part of me
Sometimes I want to give up
Because loving you this much hurts
But I can't imagine life without you
Because without you
I couldn't imagine
And that's why it hurts so much

You feel like your in my past
I talk about you as a memory
I feel in my bones this is the end
The last memory I have
Is the last one I'll ever have of us
If I knew it was the last I would of paid more attention
Remembered every word of it
Every touch
Traced your face until it was burned in my memory
The last memory we had together is lost

Its not healthy the way I cry for you
Brownies and swings remind me of you
My heart aches for you
My stomach turns when I think of you with another
You calling someone else baby girl
Holding them calming them down
Cuddling the way we use to
Calling them out of the middle of nowhere
Writing silly little poems just to make them smile
Showing them your favorite songs
I wish you were still doing those things with me
And the worst part is I don't know where we went wrong
Was it you scared of your feeling
Or me being to clingy or to obsessive
Or a little bit of both

I'm addicted to you
I make myself sick
When your not there
I Wish I had a endless supply of you

Though Years have passed
I still visit you in memory
Your voice plays over and over
Like a old favorite song
It takes me back to a time long gone

Ill always have what we had in my memories and thats better than not having it at all.

His a ******
I never suspected
I blinked and was in love
Blinked again and my heart was broken
Your alive if you want to call it that
You blinked and lost yourself
Blinked again and lost me

It hurts it hurts
It hurts to know its over
What we were
What we are
Nothing last forever
I wanted us to last forever
Tug pull tug pull
I can't take it

You were like a disease
You infected my blood
And made me weak
No matter what i try
I couldn't get over you

I wish I could write a book
It would be about me and you
It wouldn't be perfect no book is
It will have fights
And arguments
Love scene that will make your heart sing

I wish we were a song
The lyrics would be cheesy
Because the way I feel
About you is so cheesy

I wish we could last forever
Our pages and lyrics grow and grow
If we were a book
We would have a happy ending
If we were a song
We would be that cheesy happy love song

But we aren't a book or a song
So its unwritten
I don't know where it will go
Or how it will end
Im just going to let our story write its self
And hope you feel the same

When your heart breaks
It breaks
It's gut wrenching pain
You lose apart of yourself
You will never get back
But in the end
You are who you're meant to be

I wish I could trust you when you say you care
I wish you could trust me when I say I'm trying

I want to write a dark and sad poem
But you're making me happy

What your addicted to
Has convinced you that you need it
You got ****** into a black hole
Disguised as fun
Now you're drowning
Losing your grasp on reality
Keeping you away from the things you want
You choose it over anything else
You let love go
Just so you can be with addiction

Are we just a ship wreck
Stuck on a desert island
Traveling unknown territory

Silly girl what are you doing
You're doing it again
Silly girl you're gonna get hurt
Letting someone in
Silly girl put your guard up
Silly girl what were you thinking
Crazy girl slow down
Your so intense girl
Take a breath girl
Put on the brakes
Girl

You say its up to me
To do whats best for me
Open up your eyes
And realize
Your the best for me
Close your eyes and kiss me
Forget your past
And just be with me
You think your protecting me
When really your breaking me

Im a quiet person
I might come off rude or unfriendly
But get to know me
And you will see
Im not rude or unfriendly
Im just Brittany

You hide your smile like you hide your secrets

She gets in another guys car
She talks a lot
She knows he isn't listening
All he sees when he looks at her
Is a lay
Some would say how sad
She says lay down and let me on top
You'll try to hold her hand
While she goes down
She'll move your hand to her ***
She doesn't want the fake hand holding crap
Why do something that's not real
Just to make her feel you care
She used to be a fool
And believed every guy
When they promised they wouldn't leave her
Promises are easily broken she knows that now
Sometimes they might come back for seconds
Her heart used to sing when she'd hear the ding
He'd send "You wanna do it again?"
She thought that meant he liked her for more
She waited for the text
It didn't come so she sends "Wanna do it again? :)"
No reply
She learned quick that they never come back for thirds  
And then she got used to it
She's forgotten she wants someone that cares

I'm sorry you fell for such a selfish girl
I wish I knew how to show you that I care
Because I care I do
I think I love you
I wish I weren't so selfish
So I could show it
Because my heart beats for you
I want to be that girl for you the one you need
The one that knows how to show she cares
I wish I could be that girl for you
Because your that guy for me
You give me everything and more
Even when I dont deserve it

I saw your face today
I don't know if it was a dream or reality
You know when you lose someone
You start to imagine that they're there
Holding your hand
And maybe they are
Sometimes I hear your voice
I know its not there
It's gone forever
Its a voice I've heard for 20 years
And now it's no more
It's gone
That Beautiful strong voice
Is no more
Yes it hurts
Everyday I long to hear it
Once more, Just one more time
Why'd you have to leave
At such a sad time
I miss you
I miss your nicknames
You had one for everybody
I could say I missed your smile
Honestly I can't remember it
But oh how I miss you

The pain
Still lingers
It bubbles up inside
And out my eyes
Pouring down my cheeks
Aching the empty space in my chest
The left over memories
Overwhelming my mind
And takes my breath

When he left her it never crossed her mind
He'd come back
And it never crossed his that she'd be gone

I'm falling apart
Here without you
I don't know what to do
Memories of you flooding my mind
Tears flowing from my eyes
Im falling into a million pieces
I close my eyes and imagine
That my heart isn't breaking
That I didn't lose you
This isn't happening

Im done with waiting
Im over crying
I don't believe a word you say
Ive had my heart broken many times
By your broken promises
I should of learned a long time ago
Not to let myself fall for your words

You're gone
And I'm waiting
On time to speed up
Or to turn back
A temporary fix
We can't go back
There is no future
My love is strong
But I can't do it on my own
You try to come back
But I'm beginning to think you don't know how

I was young and naive
Innocent if you please
I didn't know what you were
I didn't know what it meant
You brought me into a world I didn't know exist
You showed me pain
Left my heart in chains
Your soul to blame

When we met I didn't know
You had a dark secret
One that would effect my soul
And break my heart
That would change my life
You showed me things I never dreamed of
I was there when you continued down a dark road
I watched you destroy yourself
I felt my heart break every time you chose it over me
I struggled with wether I should let you go
I needed you And you needed me
But there was something else
You thought you needed more

She passed with bright lips
And wet finger nails
Freshly dyed hair
Sad eyes a broken heart
Torn apart
She fell in love
Look at her now

Your always on my mind
Each and everytime
I go through the day
But in my heart you will stay
And beside me while I dream you will lay

I wanna delete you from my memory
So I won't know how much I miss you
Because when you aren't here with me
I feel like I'm dying
I didn't know you before
So why does it hurt so much
When your gone
Why do I miss your smile
I was fine before I knew you
So why am I falling apart without you
Why do I miss the things I never knew before
Why do I want to feel your lips on my lips
Why do I want to feel your body against mine
Why do I crave your smile
Why do I miss everything about you
I count the days until I see you
And when I see you again
Ill feel your lips on mine
Ill feel your body against me
Ill see your smile
And ill take in every part of you