Sweet little innocent blue eyes
Wanna know what they hide
Hey cat-kitty-kat-doll
Wanna come down and forget it all
Look in my hand
There's a magic wand
Wanna play with it
And build castle in the sand
Crooked-cold-scary-crazy-old-man
Walked with a cane in his right hand
Wicked smile and pocket full of candies
Tonight was in her dreams again
Cruel-dark-sick-black-world
Wanna know what you did with her
For a candy she lost her smile
And you gave her demons before her time
She was small and could barely speak
One little candy all she seek
And you gave her a nightmare before her time
made a face and said its just another crime
Sweet little innocent blue eyes
Wanna know what they hide
Hey cat-kitty-kat-doll
Maybe one day she can forget it all

what doesn't exist
you cannot resist
and it's all in your mind
the pain and the bliss

what isn't there
it must be here
isn't it ?

blind and down
but can you see through
tears of that clown

but can you see you
see what you do
through the mist ?

and they'll scream at you
that it's not your time
to escape from this



you can hate it all if you so want
hate them all if you so wish

but you cannot love, no you don't
you cannot love what doesn't exist




this moment you're stuck in
they told you it must be within
the things you've said before
every last of your sweet sins

and all of your bland stories
those dreams and a wish
they told you not to worry
here, have this poisoned kiss

one for the road that's ugly
for all those pieces that never fit




you can hate it all if you so want
hate them all if you so wish

but you cannot love, no you don't
you cannot love what doesn't exist



so many questions
those don't mean anything
they don't scream everything
there's nobody left to miss

and where were you gone before
now here you are
so alone, on your own where you sit

and you keep telling your tale
how it never fails to make you sick

sick to your heart,
how it tears you apart

so go on, and take your pick
it's something you cannot get rid
it won't see who's blue or what's green
who's been true nor who you're with




you can hate it all if you so want
hate them all if you so wish

but you cannot love, no you don't
you cannot love what doesn't exist




pretending it's all fine
I won't erase anything if I was blind

but when you know something
it's so hard to leave it behind

so many ways to die out there
why don't you make me a list ?
I'll be there for you to share
lie to me now, I insist

I've been a stranger all my life
in my anger to be rich


but I'm not yet ready to be found
by some rich man in the town

for I know what greed can do to you
I've heard how his throat got slit

leave me alone with my thoughts
I want to drown
before I can escape from arms of his





you can hate it all if you so want
hate them all if you so wish

but you cannot love, no you don't
you cannot love what doesn't exist




my baby once told me
it gets warm when fire's been lit
but don't take it in your arms
or you'll burn with it

such a strange feeling to have
when you don't know what you did

and they're all standing in a line
blaming at the same time

wandering in the cold desert
looking for some fish
there're so many fools out there
that the oasis cannot persist


what doesn't exist
you cannot resist
and it's all in your mind
the pain and the bliss

what isn't there
it must me here
isn't it ?




you can hate it all if you so want
hate them all if you so wish

but you cannot love, no you don't
you cannot love what doesn't exist

little red drops of pain
dripping again.

and i'm sipping on
the salt, telling my
brain, that there's a name
i need to burn.

I'm cold, and that's not a lie,
like the ocean i hold, of
delusion, and petty illusions,
that creates a ripple, in the
pond, and i find myself adrift,
and so on my own. in this
confusion.

give me knowledge,
questions. answers are
for scientists and the
redundant. i have an
abundance of those.

i hold myself close.
like thorns to a rose,
i'm my own sin,
nothing ever more.

i am sure, there's a door
somewhere to the light.
somewhere on the right,
away from sight and wrongs-
i've heard so many songs
about kisses and stars,
of names and scars,
i need something else.

i need a new galaxy,
to hold on-to and learn,
to cherish and then burn.

because it is only, i, here,
and i'm not the only one.

with my head between my arms
and people screamin' all around

tryin' not to **** somebody

like a bored fish I'm out of breath
oh god, why did you make me..
and make me hate everybody ?

**** me already
I'm dead with feeling dread

and I can't relate to anybody

or anything that comes my way
and whatever I like goes away

so far away

and I'm just lost in my days
pretending to be in love with dark

fading and escaping
into a void every hour
with every scar that I'm keepin'

I'm afraid to share
what I've been dreamin'

if I pray would I be spared
can I leave them behind
do you go to hell for
thoughts that are stuck in your mind ?

caught this time
I swear I'll be a good kid next rhyme

when is it enough ?
to stop lying
does it matter when I'm crying,
will that save me ?

will that save me from trying

I'm so tired
of this sun shining all the time
can I paint it black
with sulphur and smoke
bleach and choke it
until it is fine

like I am
when they ask me my name

I wish I could drink all the rain
so they'll know my thirst

flood them with my pain
so they'll realise my hurt

look, a flower in the dirt
and they keep repeatin'

how they saw it first
the flower in the dirt


so why don't you pick it up ?

across the mountains and high seas
i want to travel as far as the moon can see
and still a little more to numb my thirst
as far above the sun as below the dusk

until the night howls and winter combusts
all around the spring singing of hurt
until the autumn grows loud enough to rust
until the day burns and stars submerge

wandering down the ways uphill a bliss
where mermaids drown and the gods sit
somewhere far where the flowers hiss
and all the pieces are where they fit

there where the clowns cry and live
from nowhere to across all the towns

carrying not an ounce of pain or a crown
in temples of Angkor with nothing to give

at the end of a rainbow and rain profound
the hollow windows and barren grounds
from rotten whispers and forgotten blitz
where demons prowl and angels ****

very depth of hell and under the ground
i'll travel as deep as a melancholic sound
under my skin crawling all the way down
the thunder and my sins all in a 'round

where the lights are dim and bound
with my plastic grin and elastic faith

down the road where none can be found
i'll wait there and sin with all my hate

so come for me before i go to waste
so come for me before it gets too late

so come for me before i close the gates
so come for me and come with a blade

so come for me before i fade,
so come for me before i name my price
so come for me before i wake,
so come for me before i take my life.

I see this world rotating hanging upside down
with all of these voices screaming in my head and in the background
Like a pendulum I swing back and forth and up again
I ******* tears leaving me.. I think it's about to rain

And I wonder if it's my time ?
And I wander in my filthy mind...

Trying to make sense of this world and what I see
It's all so strange in ways I could never ever be



My thoughts are collapsing in the noise of silence
Blood rushing to my brain and I'm tasting the violence

How the hell did I find my way back here again ?
After a thousand memories as if nothing has changed
And it's all still the same

Can somebody cut the rope.. too much pressure on my veins
And I'm seeing things that cannot be


And I wonder where's my mind ?
And I wander in my filthy mind

Trying to make sense of this world and what I see
It's all so strange in ways I could never surely be

It hurts so bad and I'm normal once again
Only if for a moment..
I love when my dreams get me insane

I see the kids playing in dirt and killing all the flowers
I remember how I ate away the guilty world of ours
Just hanging by a thread and it's now bleeding me the years
And I'm afraid if I don't find a doctor soon I won't even be here

To tell you I took more than my share
And maybe that's why I'm all so f*cked up and alone there
In that space
Just hanging..


Can you not hear me ?
I've been doing things to gather your attention
I've done so much that nothing gives me the satisfaction
Twisted moments give me nothing but another dose of pain
Like a pendulum I swing back and forth and up again

Can't you see ?
All I ever wanted was to be free


And I wonder if it's my time ?
And I wander in my filthy mind

Trying to make sense of this world and what I see
It's all so strange in ways I could never truly be


Find me a potion and make me a person again
I've met all of your flavours and I want it plain
Give me poison.. I want the erosion
I don't want to be left the same



I've been awake every night I have lived in a hope to be found
And now i can't see the sun for it hurts my eyes
I've forgotten how it sounds

outside

Besides,

Way out in the woods you'll find me reaching inside my throat
Pulling out my insides so I can find my heart and build myself a boat

I've been drowning since forever and I'm feeling like a broken home
Go away from me now.. I don't ever want you to see me this open and alone

This is not how I am

I'm more than I pretend to be

Can't you see what I'll never be ?

Can you save me from me ?

Can you pretend you see what I want you to see ?



And I wonder if it's my time ?
And I wander in my filthy mind

Trying to make sense of this world and what I see
It's all so strange in ways I could never ever be

A song for you: 5/9/22










if only i could cry with somebody
how beautiful must the day be

when you're lost lookin' for somebody
oh their face is all that you see

they will tell you all love's the same
when you die nothing remains

it takes a life to forget a name
say your goodbyes when it rains

                       ------

for the night if i could be anybody
I'd be the one right next to you

doesn't matter if you want somebody
it only matters if they're not with you

they will tell you how much it pains
even though it's so hard to explain

done it before and you'll do it again
it takes nothing to fall in love again









@writeweird

comfort my mind
touch my skin

make me believe
i am here

here

i breathe nothing
i see nothing

how can i tell
anything apart?

you tell me to
sing my name

what's my name?

am i not yours
to keep

what am i
living for

is there more
to me

will i ever be
enough just for one?



how far can
i run

before i leave
me behind

is there a mountain
i can spend

between green
grass blue skies

it must mean
something

surely

things should mean
something

anything but this
sinking feeling

that keeps me awake
when i'm dying

do you know how
it feels to die

to die

how can i tell
anything apart?

when i'm never
here

when i'm already
gone

how sharp is a
memory

to cut through
the bones

the heart keeps
knocking

nobody's home
nobody's home
nobody's home

anymore





@writeweird

between, there lies my burden
on my knees i am but a servant

serving at your feet as i've done
a thousand times before

swollen gaze
resting upon your eyes

i can't flinch
and catch me by surprise  

bound in chains, kissed by
******* --

i want to taste your
addictive lies

corrupted conscience
lost in sermons

you're so vindictive it'll
never suffice

you and i cannot
survive

in this malfunctioning
world

spiralling through summer
as it grows

into autumn, uncertain,
of the winter that passes by

in that weakness i find myself
drawn to you

in your arms of ruthless
subversion

suffocate me with your
fruitful diversions

the more i am awake
more it worsens

i'm barely alive haunted
by desertion

desperate for an escape
from this burden

yours even   ever after,
i am truly yours.

find me and tell me,
that it wasn't easy.

blind me and sell me,
hell with me, i wasn't easy.

mind me and spell me,
paint me in dusk and daisies.

remind me of the hell in me,
tell me, how it consumed me maybe..

baby, lately.. it's been...
it's been hazy.

if you ever find love,
find me and tell me
that I wasn't crazy.

it was always true.

look at home,

the night is dark
and yet forgetful

warm room with
bodies sound asleep

cosy air breathes
through the windows

as the leaves fall
somewhere in the future

and a rainy day
is on the offering

carelessly stoking
arms of the clock

it's a shelter still
this warm room

filled with things
that will be --

old and dying,

as the leaves fall
somewhere in the future

for enough springs have
come to pass

now that i sit here
looking at old photographs,

visiting home.

i cut myself today
into tiny
pieces of hurt

there's so much to say
but i've sold all my words

sold all my love
and i know what i've done

living inside my flesh
i don't know what i've become

i don't know myself

and i don't want to be inside
someone else

without shiny things
without any wealth

scars smile wide
as i write on myself

colour myself in a different creed

i do not bleed
there's no ink
to breathe

and i cannot leave
this prison made of me

what i cannot be
these walls
touch and see

the window is broken
the door wide open

but i cannot flee
out there
it's all an empty sea

and i'm already so lost
so ready to pay the cost

and leave before
they catch me dreaming

like a fish
who forgot it's alive
and still breathing

i have to stop
or i'll fade before
i can stop reading

between the lines
eating on my mind

walking on acid and wine
staring into the mirror

it's so cold and sharp
and it whispers

to me
about everything that withers
back to winter

and i'm so old with no heart
it's so easy to forget
how the dark still lingers

but the blood's still red
as it flows down a river

and i'm drowning,


laying underneath my bed
with monsters in my head

nobody has ever found me


and i'm still crawling
angry and howling

i don't know why

searching for a way
back to my myself

as the moment dies.

far from this place
there is a september

that waits for us
with a golden sunrise

where siblings sing
in circles

holding hands like
they used to

back in '99

when this world was
a better place

grass was soft
and green

sky was big
and blue

whence dreams
never left

how quickly the
sun sets to the west

now that it's the
end of the world


@writeweird

One..two..three..

Sleep..


confusion creates ripples
Blurred faces and hushed whispers
All across the place where it stands
So many thoughts unraveling
Flowering into the empty space
in a voice i do not understand



Do what makes you happy
For in time you'll be empty
The day will be spent
With nothing to repent
And tomorrow will be gone
For an eternity




Ask yourself when you can
Was it all worth it ?


The dream you've been living
Did you ever find it ?




My heart simmering in warm glow-
Of the heavens angels those sing
Falling in love with my wishful dreams
Screaming about my lonely sin
in a way i do not understand






I am crawling back to deep slumber
With all that maths
and all those numbers
Staring at me from the corner
Of the coming december




As i sit and,




Separate the two faces staring at the wall
Before the blues infects the tear drops





Do not whisper
Close your eyes
And just breathe

Do not linger
Let it all die
So you can leave





Pretend to be someone else
It's easy to lie and fade
You can almost see yourself
In pieces you've been made

The dreams you've been chasing
You're never going to catch it
What else are you still looking for
Do you think you'll ever find it




As i sit and,



Break the two hearts beating as one
I know, there's only room for one




No it's not weird
When no one seems to understand
Sometimes it's not real
Like a broken castle in the sand


Let them all disappear
Now there's nobody here
They're all gone

Do you still feel naked
Are you still scared
Was it the fear all along ?




Slow down and freeze
Into another moment and drown
Can you feel the torment
Of being never found
Even when they're all around




Just when you're smiling
You're about to cry
Everything you've been missing
And you don't know why



Something is always missing
So
You've painted the night
With a million stars you'll never see
In a hope the sun sets one day
And we could be free



Wake up..



One..two..three

you suffer,
and so, you learn-
talk about stars and lovers,
through scars, and
how they don't burn anymore

dreaming eyes,
dream about the dreadful lies;

the man in the sky,
isn't here sitting besides you-

the woman you pry;
maybe she's slick and sly,
it makes you sick,
and you wonder why ?

maybe it isn't about
love anymore.


the world has summer,
and it had your winter-

autumn withers'
spring too;

and the man in the sky,
he isn't sitting there anymore

the child you could see
in the mirror, died;

he's no more, maybe-
only as much as you are today;

and the bird you
could've freed;

you placed silence by
its side, and a song
on it's beak, so bleak-

bleached by the solemn
good-bye, and a seed,

praying, it becomes a tree,
and not a storm.

i'm in a war zone, with rage in my bones, with stick and stones, so sick and tired of the ones gone,
i feel so alone, on my own, with brick and fire, building myself a safe haven,
where i won't be mistaken, for mistakes and scratched lines,
i'm too attached to my mind, i don't see the outline, I don't care for time,
it's just a needle going back and forth, and before you tell me I'll grow old,
i'm already dead, and I know you already know,
if somebody cut open your head, it'll be as ugly as mine,
if somebody cut open your heart, it'll be as cold as mine,
this world taught us we'll be fine, it'll rip us apart before we ever see the shine, sun-shine

there's sun to shine,
in sun shine,
there's nothing to be afraid of,
you see them lying,
you see them crying,
you see them be lost,
oh, you see them crying,
you see, there's only one kind,
the one nobody minds,
there's only one sun to shine,
in sun shine-
there's nothing to be afraid of,
nobody's dying,
everything will be fine,
act surprised, they don't know
what you are made of.

and I'm not the king, oh no,
I'm not the slave,
I don't have the comfort of knowing,
I'm just growing old,
so rotten and cold, maybe it's forgotten,
and I am back in autumn,

so hold onto this torch for me,
and put me on fire if someday I do not wake, that's why I put my voice on tapes,
I don't have a choice, there's only noise
and it does not fade,
put me on fire if I do not break,
if I do not wake, if I do not hate,
put me on fire if I do not fade.


let's talk, just you and me, let's talk-
just you and see, let's take a walk,
count, one, two, three and down,
one for free, drown for thee,
there's nobody else,
who has seen the hell, you claim to be
handful of scars and nothing else to see,
mindful, any day could be your last,
don't ask too many questions,
there's no need for emotions,
there's no need to bleed on vacations,
don't worry about annihilation, for the duration-
sorry, but only the man with gold deserves standing ovation,
and you can't get in, all the tickets sold,
this place is wicked,
the face is sick and wet,
with all those tears and years it was fed lies, they say in heaven nobody dies and everybody is happy,
and anybody who's anybody gets what they like, rich folks,
with their fancy hair and dyes,
ugly teeth, can't you see,
they are as empty as you and I,
it's all the same, and we shouldn't take no name,
we don't know what's sane anymore, we act surprised,
all we do is write stories and complaint, maybe we're all the same,
maybe it's just one huge game, there are a few but not many who can tame,
that beast inside of us, full of love, don't mention the stuff in your veins,
put things in motion, and everybody is now chasing erosion, like some form of poison, pacing up and down in their minds,
inside, in oceans,
outside there are these walls,
can't be broken,
there are no doors, so, therefore
there's nothing to open,
I'm just awoken, and maybe I'll go
back to sleep,
sing for me, dream, scream for me,
grin for me, take the smoke in for me,
choke on your thoughts,
caught up in your rot,
you ought to be ashamed you see, doing things your mamma, did not
want to see, tell me,
is this what they wanted you to be ? but **** them right ?
they don't see what you can see,
they cannot hear what you wear, they cannot
feel what you feel,
so, steal away all their time, don't mind,
they were never the equation, and you were never patient, they are ancient,
that's how you were raised, the weaker gets eaten up by the invasions,
nobody is anybody just names on a page,
this world is nothing, it's everything, it's a cage-
and I'm not the king, oh no,
I'm not the slave, I don't have the comfort of knowing,
I'm just growing old, so rotten and cold, maybe it's forgotten, I'm back in autumn, so hold this torch for me,
and put me on fire if someday I do not wake, that's why I put my voice on tapes,
I don't have a choice, there's only noise
and it does not fade,
put me on fire if I do not break,
if I do not wake, if I do not hate,
put me on fire if I do not fade.

Wish I could tell you all the things in my mind,
swimming in circles, breathing fire.
I lost myself a thousand years ago,
And with time there was no desire to be anything,
I'm satisfied with nothing...
but they don't want that for me
they always want everything.

After all will be said and done,
I'll still mourn for your loss.
I am still young, forever old,
cold and calculating the cost,
evaluating what is left for the lies,
in my truth.. I never asked the price.

now they will enslave me,
take away the air and replace it with chains,
I remember their faces, I do..
but I cannot recall their names,
ghosts and angels,
they tell me..
that my time is near
I hear their blame,
can they not see my pain?


I cannot tread any mountain,
nor I can change the direction of any river,
spring means nothing to snow,
it'll only fall in winter..
to paint my creed
so black and white
so frozen..
I am broken..
yet, I cannot leave
I cannot breathe
if I stop to breathe,
Would I die?


No,


I've done that for a thousand years,
and I'm still more alive than dead
and one day they will whisper my name,
oh, they will scream it in the air
and I will be everywhere,
burning everything to the ground,
for in time they will make a monster,
oh, when my parents will die..
there would be nothing but a thousand years of vengeance,
raining down from my eyes.



and I will forgive no one.

cut open the lamb
give in to your scars

there's only a whisper
to comfort your soul


wandering the lands
searching the stars

world's going to wither
back to the cold



find me in your dreams
strangle my breath

look away when i scream
you don't have to be here
with me inside my head


you're torn at the seam
in same ways as i

i'll tell you all that i've seen
only if you promise
you'll be here when i die



in the forests green
where the devil spies

will you find me there
even if i never tell you why ?

comfort my soul
touch my hand

make me believe
i am here

here

i breathe nothing
i see nothing

how can I tell
anything apart?

you tell me to
sing my name

what's my name?

am i not yours
to keep

what am i
living for

is there more
to me

will i ever be
enough for one

how far can
i run

before i leave
me behind

is there a mountain
i can spend

between green
grass blue skies

it must mean
something

surely

things should mean
something

anything but this
sinking feeling

that keeps me awake
when i'm dying

do you know how
it feels to die

to die

how can i tell
anything apart?

when i'm never
here

when i'm already
gone

how sharp is a
memory

the heart keeps
knocking

nobody's home
nobody's home
nobody's home

anymore





@writeweird

with my hands on my heart and knife on the clown
I'm just pretending I'm laughing..while it all crashes down..
just breathing for a moment.. and watching everyone around
they look so happy.. have they all been swimming in the magic potion..
brewed by the old ghost i found lingering in the shadows..
I wonder if they can see how the flood has swept everything away on the ground..
the noahs arc is broken.. begging for mechanic to repair the scars..
every hour a new boy is born to rip off the struggling heart..
no daughter to confuse your soul with.. the father makes me sick..
and mother's out there in the ocean.. ready to drown..

is that what they preached when we were kids ?
I never came to know.. i was down for a while with random ****..
and they told me my words don't mean anything unless I learn with fire..

where there is hate there is desire to destroy whatever you make of it..
stranger times have weathered the storms.. those gave me the chills

and I'm forgetting if I was supposed to be polite to the outside world..
the same folks who never cared if the little boy was hurt..

now Give me your solution and dissolve me of your worries..
I want that bollywood hit... where I'll be lost with a beautiful chick lost in poppy seeds.
I've bled what you bleed and I was never disgusted to how it all panned out...

no matter how much the school principle spent the time in screaming..
I never heard  anyone shout...
MAYBE I never cared for the migraine bouts..
far too less concerned with life and all that it takes away..
always ready to run away
from their dreams and what they kept out to be lost..

I was never the good child.. always pathetic and vile...
ready to **** in a moment of heat.. now I've stabbed myself enough to leave..

Let me go.. let me rule my world..
let me love like no other..
I don't need your fake sisters and brothers..
I DON'T pray to your god.. I'm just happy alone in the woods...
With a pair of socks and twenty dogs..
waiting for me to whistle I never came to realise..
I'm ready for your demise..
I'm ready for mine..

pray that I don't ever cross your path.. they say I have a burning mind..

too engrossed in moment of bliss.. that i don't have the time to be who's right..
But that's alright..
that's enough for a fight..
and in the night I'll pretend I've fallen asleep...
dreaming about things they never let me keep..
for an age.. I was getting on the stage.. for the reapers who wouldn't really reap..

that's a thousand feet from where I've stood all my life..
holding the knife on my throat that cuts deep..

isn't it beautiful to be different when you don't know how to be anything else ?

maybe a tree that isn't free ?

What they cannot be And what I cannot see ?

do I have to be what they tell me how it's all supposed to be ?

never beautiful but always afraid..


why not be how i was made ?

even though a mistake..

isn't it beautiful to be ugly..

you're still as beautiful as the morning sky, the reason to my rhyme,

don't care about that many miles, i don't have any lines to combine,

words don't save you when you're blind.

i needed somebody and i found you,

so thank you for being there for me, when it was the time,

i'm so sorry that i had so much hate in me, that i wasn't right in my mind,

but i hope you're alright and everything's fine, you still smile-

and that you're closer to that place that you always wanted to find,

i know you have it in you to shine, bird, i know it now, i knew it then, when you were mine.  

so one of a kind, but i guess it's fine 'cause we are all designed to forget with time

and before i do, i want to say thank you before i forget you, and after all it's you,

so i don't have to say anything to you, for the laughter was true, as true as you was and I,

and i know you'll miss me too, it's a good-bye.

I've been looking
for you everywhere
where are you ?
I've been breaking the sun
every night.

what has it done
that you've become so ugly
you don't make me feel pretty
anymore alright.

is this what you've become
is this how you come undone
is this all there is to it ?

I've been searching
for you to wake me up
I'm feeling so afraid
of monsters that you made
that i've forgotten how to love


is this what you've become
is this how you come undone
is this all there is to it ?


I don't know if it's you
I've learned enough stories
that now I'm sure I know
how this universe works

If it's guilty and true
it has to hurt
I'll write you down
in my mind
before your soul erupts

I'll even help you
count the cost
I'm not telling any lies
but you stink of loss

but you will never listen
even though they're all gone

something's wrong
with your brain they say
they're not my words
that i can erase any way

tell me please
do you remember
what you miss the most ?

or is it still hard
and you cannot leave
this mind of yours ?

don't be rude
make up your mind
nobody else is going to
paint it for you
but be sure if you do
we only sell in black

now tell me
where in hell were you ?

little people
small people
people full of scars

riddle me people
why the feeble mind ?

why bother time
with your reaper's heart ?

cry with me,
when I read you your tar,

filthy hands, guilty stars
many men, any man-
but yet i see no flowers

nobody's awake at this hour

and i've slowly spent all my
will to live,
i repent the kind man who
sought this thrill to give,

frozen smile, stuck by the clock;
locked in place and stiff,
opened files, an omen dies,
and he spoke with a slight lisp

munching on something
light and crisp,
searching for nothing,
nothing's as vile and sick;

reaching for that one thing-
that gun thing, them rocks and sticks,

how about that sun thing ?
what would a son think,
when he's burdened by the mist,
pretending to be human enough
to pretend that he's amiss,

amidst the chaos and the risks,
forgotten names and letters,
from faces that he don't miss-

and they think it gets better
the more you drink and fish,
so ink yourself a moon, and
buy yourself a letter-
so, you can sin, sing and wish

for some time alone.

*****, murdered and tortured
and they say we'd fix this,

it's just out of order, it's not
one of our own, we cannot risk it

it's far too far from my home,
I couldn't possibly see it,

impossible impossibility, I'm losing
all my sanity, my ability to see
monsters from men, i can clearly see
how bad it becomes, when you only
care about the ends, ends justify the
means and there's no one to blame
'cause all we do is talk through paper and pen, where were we when she was taken ?
why couldn't we see, the reality
and what will it take for us to be awoken
and bleed humanity,

get our hands outside the oven,
get our heads outside in the open

I swear the world has lost
some of its colour,
I swear I can hear the sky cry,
and I can't deny, and I don't
even know why,
but I can see how it all
is being broken

inch by inch, one by one
someone preaching to sin,
somebody teaching how to bottle up all our emotions,

somebody reaching for the neck
and squeezing it until it is broken
how do you do that ?

don't they ever look back
in your eyes ?
what made you so broken ?

why is the world broken,
can somebody repair the air,
it's too toxic to breathe,
it's everywhere now and it's
just so exhaustive to see

maybe the gods have spoken
there's no silver lining and there's
no lying, the birds ain't flying
no more

everything is crashing down
all around, it makes no sound,
wakes nobody around, and nobody is ever going to come around,

this world is pathetic, and I've had it
it's automatic what I'm feeling
and I still haven't been outspoken

you haven't seen me at my worst,
but there's more to the pain when every inch of you hurts

we'll come for you,
as you did for us

I'll take no names
and I'll talk no more than you deserve

I'm just here to tell you, your seat in hell is reserved,

see you there, *****
your sight make my eyes hurt
your face makes me sick,
you are a ******* disease

my momma taught me to never
abuse anybody,
but you're not anybody, you're a ******* leech,
feeding on the *****, murdered and the tortured,
why did you do this, you sick ****, why did you have to torch her,
and eat her remains, see what you did, now ******* look, look what remains,

a world burning, pages turning, cameras clicking stains, the clock ticking,
for the next victim to die in vain,

what will it be, how could you be so blind that you couldn't even see,
a child dying, tears drying, a mother crying for the nightmares to leave,

how could you not feel, how is this ever supposed to be fine,
but I'm so numb now, it feels as if it's better not to feel,
that way at least you won't lose your mind, you've lost your heart,
and you'll lose yourself in time, consume yourself, exhume yourself,
take in the fumes when they set, forget what you thought,
you aren't caught in the storm, you're just watching through a screen,
you can mute the screams when it starts making you feel wrong,


I swear to god, if there's a god, he must be in pain,
I swear to god, if there's a god, she must be going insane,
I kid you not, we're all involved, because somewhere deep down we're all the same,
****** up monsters, and maybe a month down the drain, we're all be looking for the next slaughter, laughter,
our happily ever after, until the flames go up again,

and then we'll light a candle,
put pictures up on the mantel,

read the scriptures, give the verdict,
pull out our *****, and be a **** about it

talk mental, walk in anger,
cause everyone else is frowning too;
yeah maybe we'll even feel pain
after all she was strangled, her body
was found dismantled and mangled,

around the corner, stranded and
by the standards,

and we'll light candles,
******* candles.

to light up the night, or hide the darkness all around us ?

I'm sweating, I'm getting rotten,
I'm running, I'm screaming,
I'm fallen.
somebody take me back to autumn,
I'm not leaving, I'm still dreaming,
I am not forgotten.





I'm clinically insane, I don't remember my name,
I can clearly hear voices in my brain, someone just screamed at me to hurt myself again.

I can tell you my story but you see... you see I'm not sorry for what I became,
I never knew who I was long before when things seemed so lost and strange.

no matter how much I bleach my eyes, I can't undo what cannot be changed,
no matter how much I teach my lies, the words will whisper the same.



I left that place a wrong time ago and all that's left of it is deranged.



A feeling I can't describe, it eats me out alive and I feed on the pain,
I can't explain, there's so much noise to bleed that I fear I might miss the train.

I don't want to be the lonely one, the only one closed in a frame
weeping in silence forever, at a
corner where no one remembers my name.

I know in time I will eat all that is mine, the monster won't be tamed,
for I've seen the evil shine when ever my eyes rain.

and they will tell you it was me, no one's else guilty enough to be blamed,
hell, don't tell it wasn't for me, for I fell in love with the chains.