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Jaycee Nov 2014
Voices live inside,
They have been telling me that,
They want me to die.
Bella Jul 17
Sometimes I get stuck in this state of Darkness
where my eyes can see
but it's like my head is just pitch black
and I almost wish I couldn't see anything,
like I wish I could just curl myself into a ball so tightly that I disappear from space for a while

sometimes I get stuck in this space
and I feel like my tears and my thoughts
are climbing up my esophagus and clogging my throat
blocking my airway
suffocating me from the inside

maybe I never told you I was depressed because who wants to relive that moment
that choking hazard moment of cotton ***** in my throat

maybe I never told you I was depressed because there are no words I can use to describe it that don't transform themselves into their meanings
that don't take over my mind
crawl through my head like little worms
eating away at my brain
my thoughts
my skin

have you ever thought of a traumatic experience and then felt those events happening again
felt the dark hole of life-threatening-trauma attack your mind
Shiver through your body
like it was a demon you let in through a memory-
through a word

maybe I didn't tell you I was depressed
because I wasn't strong enough
my depression fills me to the brim
fills my head and my chest
my arms and my fingers
I can feel it moving through my body
I can feel it expanding and engulfing everything inside of me
every last vein, nerve, *****, and tissue
how can you expect me to have the energy to fight
how can you expect me to have the energy to pick up the phone
to open my mouth
how can you expect me to have energy-to have the courage to utter the words of how I feel
I feel so worthless
in those moments I feel like there's this black whole inside me and it's consuming everything
it's taking everything but my skin
and it disgusts me

can you imagine the feeling,
having something so utterly repulsive on your skin you had to scrape it off immediately
It felt like you needed to be cleansed
like you needed a shower
take that feeling
now imagine it being under your skin
imagine, every muscle ***** vein nerve every cell in your body underneath your epidermis disgusts you
imagine all you wanted to do was to
GET
IT
OFF
and you can't
no matter how hard you try
you can't scrape it off
you can't claw It off

imagine you're scared of spiders
now imagine you're covered in spiders
and someone's holding down your arms
so you can't get them off
imagine them walking on your skin
in your mouth
crawling on your open eyes
in your ears
you're cringing at your own skin
You can feel them going down your throat
Their disgusting tickle in your stomach
in every crevice of your body
their tunneling under your skin
and you can't get them off
what are you supposed to do
but cry
My best friend's mom who doesn't believe in depression asked why I never told her I was depressed...
Cress Rosario May 2014
I closed my eyes, leaned my back
Relaxed, unwind, and lids locked
Suddenly, I opened my eyes
We were running away from fires

Eagerly holding his hand
I was afraid and terrified
He looked at me giving the bravest smile
"Honey stay with me, you'll be fine."

I blinked half a second...
We're inside a building left undone
Grunge, old, and sad
Something has been chasing us

A huge thing, a dauntless thing
Is it a wolf? No... It's a beast
They are increasing, expanding
Approaching, my heart is fast beating

This guy holding me never lets my hand go
With him by my side, I know what to do
The run never ends, the pant never stops
I closed my eyes, ran fast and then hopped!

My eyes were opened, he was beside me
It's a light cool dawn, I've been in a terrifying sleep
I continued leaning my back on a soft, white sheet
Stared at the window, what a dreadful dream!
This explains what happened and what I felt on my dream last night. Not an exact explanation.. but it's a terrifying one. I always dreamed of being chased and being on a scary places or scene. I'm glad I am with my beautiful guy there in my whole dream. Giving me the safest feeling.
She Writes Jul 11
I don’t know what scares me more
You wanting to know my secrets
Or my willingness to share them
Luisa C Dec 2016
am i scared of living without you,
or just scared of being alone
Day Nov 2015
don't look me in the eyes
it's pretty scary in there,
it's where i keep everything
that's not considered
''acceptable''
all the hate
and all the love

and everything
i'm too scared to say
out loud

so beware
you might find things
that you
don't wanna see
i'm scared of so many things
elaine Sep 9
my grip is slipping,
and falling scares me.
my world is fading away.
h      
          e
                     l
                             p
       m
                 e

h
          e
                    l
                          ­     p
          m
                     e

writing was an escape but even now words slip off the paper like tear drops.
why does it have to be like this?
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