Holding my hands out as you split my wrists again
Bending my fingers back, I’ll breathe again when I hear them pop
Holding handfuls of glass as it shatters, smaller and smaller.
Sinking into my skid.
How comforting your lies feel.
How cold your love feels.
Dancing around the noose, walking our little circles.
Just kick the stool out, I deserve that.
Maybe the audience will find some solace in the way my eyes fade, maybe they’ll have some pity as my body flails.
Maybe the circles will get tight enough to suffocate me.
Maybe I’ll find the thing that you couldn’t give me,
Floating mere feet from the ground
You are a loser.
It's not right to claim that
you are great.
You can do well.
But that's not true because
You are less of a person.
You'll never succeed since
you are just an underdog.
(Now read bottom up.)
Copyright © 2020
Sam N. de la Rosa
All Rights Reserved.
Slowly letting go
Daydreaming lovers and lies untold
Bold but homely
Bored and lonely
Cross-eyed and painless
Strung out and brainless
Uncomfortable oh comely
I still exist - I think.
I know this isn't all there is
*****, beautiful, broke, and free
Is the only state in which I find peace.
Dawn is breaking and so am I
Daylight bright in misty eyes
I woke alone, in my tent in a forest;
hugged and kissed the void good morning
I miss something I've never had and it's vicious in my mind.
There are certain emotions I am unable to process
They’ve left me suffocated. They cause me to stress
Stress over things that might be of no value in the near future
But it is now; they make me feel like I am a complete loser
These emotions go tough on my body but they flow with ease as I bleed on paper
And the feelings I once had for people I loved, are depleting layer by layer.
I do not want to argue anymore
Show me the way to the door
I would rather slum it surfing couch to couch
Than hide from life as I slack and slouch
Look down upon from your self-righteous horse
Insults hurled til your voice is hoarse
And "wouldn't you feel bad if I died?"
As if unaware of how I feel inside
I hate living with constant fear and anxiety. I honesty do not know how to refrain from taking it out on other people. Especially those close to me, such as my mother.
Dont call youself a loser
Because that's not what you are
In my eyes and in my heart,
You're a shining shooting star
You are perfect and loving,
The flower that always blooms.
Even when your stuck in dirt,
Your petals gleam amongst the moon
Dont give up the grueling fight
This is what you've known and done
Dont keep beating on your head,
Strike the pain until you've won.
Dont suffer or be angry
Thank God for this great chance
To show them you don't just sing
But steal the spotlight when you dance
Dedicated to the woman i love the most❤
Where are you, my Victory?
I'm such a loser without you.
Put your hand in mine
Hypnotize with a smile
Keep me warm.
I want to know
If you like my stupid soul
I'm just a loser in this sad world
And you're my hope
Take me with you
Wherever you go.